AN = I've fell in love with Jennette's songs, like Better and Place To Fall. And I've never written a song fanfic before; so I'm gonna put the two together. I sang this song to my class; and they weren't that nice to me about it. Well, my 'friends' were, but I was still shaking like an hour after I sang. Hope you enjoy!
Better
In the corner of my room, there's a pile of things that still belong to you.
I look over to my dresser and realize there's a few textbooks and a white fluffy jumper piled up. The textbooks are his and, surprisingly, so is the jumper. Well, the jumper is sort of his. He gave it to me a while ago when I complained about being cold; and I guess he just never asked for it back.
And I'll give 'em back, but here tonight, I'll go through 'em one by one without a fight.
I chuckle as I look through the writing book. Pieces of paper come tumbling out. Not just any paper though. I chuckle again when I see what it actually is. It's the notes we were sending each other when we were bored. The teacher yelled at us and made us wash her car. I'm not sure if teachers are actually allowed to do that, but I didn't want to get into anymore trouble.
And I don't care if I cry, it should hurt you said goodbye, and I have the right to drag it out and make it worse
I love the way we lie to each other about how we actually feel. It seems like that's our own secret language of saying 'I love you'. I can say that, but I can't say everything I wanna say. A tear rolls down my cheek and drops onto the paper. Here I go again. The waterworks. I almost feel disappointed in myself. But I totally have the right to be upset because we said goodbye.
I'm going to take my time, 'til I wake up one morning and I find... That I feel better.
I carry on looking through the pile of books. Physics. Chemistry. Algebra. Spanish. French. I can't believe I actually let him tutor me for those exams last week. I wasn't really bothered if I was to pass or fail anyway; but he said that these exams are really important. I glance over at the jumper again. I can't fight it anymore, so I quickly put it on and admire myself in front of the mirror. It's as fluffy as sheep's' fur itself. The strong scent of his cologne makes me imagine his arms are wrapped around me once again.
Outside my window, there's the moon, and it's saying don't get over you too soon.
The moon shines into my room. I remember about a hour ago that I was walking beneath it back from his place. We both said we would try 'us' again soon but we were just too different. Still, I shouldn't give up hope.
So I'll keep breaking until I'm done, and I get it through my head you weren't the one.
He is the one for me, I think to myself repeatedly. I'm surprised that I haven't ran out of tears yet. I collapse back onto my pillows, leaving the textbooks half open in front of me.
And I don't care if I cry, it should hurt you said goodbye, and I have the right to drag it out and make it worse.
This is going to be harder than I thought. Nothing is going to make this better. I'm broken.
I'm going to take my time, 'til I wake up one morning and I find...That I feel better.
I doubt I'll ever feel better though. I sit back up and pull out paper and a pencil from the drawer beside me. I start to write how I feel down, every last detail. Maybe this will be better as a song... Now, what should it be called?
Better.
Perfect.
'Til I look at your pictures and run out of tears and you're not all I'm thinking about. 'Til I don't turn around, hold my breath for the sound of you saying my name out loud
Oh Whoa Oh Oh Oh
And I don't care if I cry, it should hurt you said goodbye and I have the right to drag it out and make it worse. I'm going to take my time, 'til I wake up one morning and I find... That I feel better.
Better
And I know now, that I feel a lot better...
AN = This story has been up a week already! It feels like only yesterday when I looked at my traffic stats. (Oh, wait, it was.) I'm really happy how this story is going. Thank you so much, everyone! Reviews to me are like Sam and her ham.