Veronica stared up at her ceiling. She couldn't sleep. Three days and she still couldn't find a way to fall asleep that wasn't passing out form sleep deprivation. Heather had Heather and Kurt had Ram. She didn't know what Martha, Heather, and JD did but they all looked better rested than she did in the morning (Dr. Fleming spewed some bullshit about how she just needed to open up more to feel more comfortable, as her dark circles were the one thing Veronica couldn't hide form the therapist).

Veronica sighed and sat up, counting sheep wasn't going to work tonight, not that it ever did. She thought about getting her notebook out, but then she'd stay up all night writing instead. She needed something to put her to sleep that wasn't crawling in the bed with Heather and Heather, even if they were going to get married. The only other thing she could think of was a late-night snack.

Veronica tiptoed down the hallway and into the main area, where the couch and the chairs had yet again been rearranged by Heather, Kurt, and Ram in an act of stir-crazy impulsion. It really was pathetic how little had been planned for a group of teenagers to do all summer.

She was surprised to see the kitchen light on and even more surprised to see JD up an all the bowls and glasses seeming to have been drug out of the cabinet. "What are you doing up so late?" he raised an eyebrow as soon as he noticed her.

"I was just about to ask the same thing," Veronica crossed her arms.

"Same as you, I suppose, can't sleep like any other sane person in this hellhole."

"So you got the sudden urge to have a midnight snack or something?"

"And you're in the kitchen doing who knows what with all the dishes." It suddenly registered to her that they weren't having a normal conversation, or he hadn't. It was so confusing when he was so close to sounding normal. Several times the past couple of weeks she'd get a few sentences into a conversation before realizing he wasn't stopping his third person mannerism. Expect this time she was too tired to play along and she didn't have her notebook to write about it either.

"I'm making some hot chocolate, want some?" she offered, reaching for one of the glasses that were already out. Picking it up she noticed there were markings, looking closer she found the markings were measurements. "What is this? Serving size for milk one cup… serving size for orange juice three-fourths cup… Did you do this?... Did you do this for Heather?" That's when she finally saw the marker in his hand.

"So you've noticed how she's always fussing about whenever we try to make her eat even though she knows that she needs it." He remarked, writing something down on a baggie.

"You're measuring out exact serving sizes for her." Veronica finally put it together. That's when she saw everything. Not only were all the bowls and cups and plates out, but so were boxes of cereal and measuring cups and other assortments of food. "You think that'll help anything?" he merely shrugged in response and pointed to the milk jug. Veronica was puzzled for a second before remembering her hot chocolate.

"Can I help?" If she was going to be up she might as well do something that might be useful. Again she was met with silence and just a shrug. They worked together in silence (except for JD chewing on some ice like he "always seemed to be doing).

Eventually she did have hot chocolate, but that was after she helped JD finish measuring out serving sizes and put the dishes away. They sat on the couch, dreary eyed and while she sipped on a mug of warm cocoa and JD continued to suck on ice cubes. It was 3:47 in the morning, there was no way she was going back to sleep so all there was left to do was wait for the sun (or Kurt, Veronica was pretty sure Kurt got up at 5:00 to exercise while Ram couldn't monitor him like a child).

JD hadn't really said much, which she considered odd. He was usually engaging in some sort of sharp banter with someone that he, more often than not, started.

Veronica felt her fingers twitch against her mug. She didn't like thinking this early in the morning, especially without her notebook. She needed to write down her thoughts.

JD bit down on an ice cube, breaking her concentration. "What's that supposed to do?" It was the first thing that came to her mind and she was too tired to have a filter.

He raised an eyebrow at her. "I thought you already told me this."

"You told me it's a coping mechanism, but you didn't tell me how. It's an alternative to self-harm, but how? You're chewing ice, how's that an alternative?" She didn't think she was being nosy or insensitive. It's not like she was asking him to prove the validity of his problems.

"You just sit there numbing the roof of your mouth like brain freeze." He sucked another ice cube in with a pop (like with a grape).

"Brain freeze?"

"Like second rate brain freeze." He corrected, grinning.

"So why not ice cream?"

"So why not a whole gallon in one sitting?"

"... Is that problematic or-"

"Just the fact that any normal person could eat a tub of ice cream in one sitting?" he finished for her. She wanted to relax a little, but he always had cup of ice so she couldn't help wondering.

"So is there anything better than ice besides eating a tub of ice cream at a time?" Veronica tried to keep her more relaxed front.

"So is there anything better than a Slurpee?" Veronica thought back to the other day when Heather had complained about wanted to go to a Sev-Elev for a Slurpee. JD hadn't replied, but Veronica remembered joking to herself that he fit the type of person to actually kill someone over a Slurpee from Seven-Eleven.

"A Slurpee huh? I guess I was right when I suspected you and Heather were in cahoots to break out of here and haul ass to rob the nearest Sev-Elev."

"The biggest heist since Ocean's 11."

Veronica suddenly burst out laughing uncontrollably to the point of mild hyperventilation. Eventually she calmed down enough to barely coherently mumble out "Ocean's 7-11" before succumbing to nothing but giggles again. JD was looking at her very disapprovingly but was also trying very hard to keep from laughing. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, but he too ended up giving in to her dumb joke and the both of them laughed hysterically together for at least thirty seconds.

She was a little shocked to hear him laugh fully and not just snicker. Again, it was probably the lack of sleep they were currently running on. "Worst. Joke. Ever." He managed to deadpan.

"You laughed so I don't believe you." She finished off the remainder of her hot chocolate and set the mug to the side. "So where did you learn such a nifty little trick?" Upon examine her words, she wasn't entirely sure she should call it 'nifty'.

"Was it suggested by a half decent therapist or was it self-learned when the other stopped being an option? Or maybe a combination of both?"

"And how did you mom take this therapist prescribed addiction to Slurpees?" she air quoted 'therapist prescribed'.

"Guess she couldn't really do much being dead and all." Veronica stared at him. He really hadn't just said that so casually, had he?

Veronica gaped stupidly but she wasn't sure what she could say.

"Guess it didn't help with all the crazy. Poor Jason Dean watched his mom commit suicide by walking into a building his dad blew up a few minutes later, of course he's going to have a few screws loose." He tugged at the sleeve of his trench coat. Veronica hadn't even realized he had it on. He always had it on it had just became a part of him. But if he had it on now, then did he ever take it off?

"I'm-I'm so sorry JD You didn't deserve to have that said behind your back."

"Or in front of your face either."

"They did not." Loathing crept into Veronica's voice so pure she wasn't aware she was even capable of feeling.

"But you're crazy and a kid, so it's not like you're going to understand." JD continued picking at his sleeve. He was no longer looking at her and had lost the sarcastic drawl in his voice. "It's not like each word cuts like a blade until the cute become real. But what else can you do except pretend you don't hear the whispers and the gossip. You're asking for it aren't you? When you change schools every trimester and you wear a trench coat and talk in third person. Why even ask for people to give you a chance when that's what you present them with? People don't care how hard you've tried in the past or how hard you're still trying because you're obviously not trying hard enough if you're still doing it. They don't care if you wear the coat to hide the scars or if you talk that way because you literally can't stop no matter how hard you try. They don't care how hard you try as long as you're still doing it."

Veronica couldn't process all the information being thrown at her. She picked up bits and pieces, 'change schools every trimester', 'to hide the scars'. She needed her notebook to write out her thoughts and process what was being said. But one thing that made its way through loud and clear was J.D.'s voice cracking. Without thinking – she couldn't think – she leaned over and hugged him.

She wasn't sure if she was surprised when he hugged her back, there were too many things running around in her brain, but she could feel him grasping at her shoulders. He shuddered against her as he attempted to keep his breath under control. She didn't let go and she wasn't sure how long they stayed like that but eventually she realized JD was muttering something in her ear as he buried his face in her shoulder. 'Veronica, Veronica, Veronica'

AN:: Sorry this update took forever, welcome to my normal update schedule (randomly after long wait times).

So a few things happened that held this up.
First, I could not for the life of me get in the groove for writing this chapter. I started over like five times (seriously).
Then I finally got what was a pretty mediocre chapter finished (literally ready to post it, like was writing up the author's note and everything) - and I'm not kidding when I say mediocre, I wasn't very happy with how the chapter turned out but decided that I would never move on with the story if I kept staring at it - when a few people on my FanFic account commented THE SWEETEST FREAKING COMPLIMENTS I HAVE EVER RECEIVED - not to say my average comment isn't nice, but one girl asked me if I'm on the Heathers writing staff (no honey, I'm not, I'm just a girl finishing up her senior year in high school and using this as procrastination but I am so touched you think I'm that good) - and I could not post that chapter when I thought it was that crap after receiving such high compliments. Like I felt morally obligated to a better chapter for y'all.
So I started again.
Then I got addicted to NBC's Hannibal and binged that and read way too much fanfiction so that was a distraction (hehehehe please don't kill me).
And now we're here! I finally finished!
I hope you like it and I really am sorry it took so long. Love y'all!

P.S. If you're wondering why I respond to other people's comments and not yours it's probably because it's been more than a week since I updated and I'm afraid if I'm seen answering questions and stuff y'all will be expecting me to be working on the next chapter which 9/10 I'm not so I'm too scared to answer. I think I'm going to go back and answer and talk after an update if I didn't respond in the author's notes