Apologies if this took so long. The first draft got lost in the shuffle. So, I have to start from scratch.
Sinnoh Now has been running a coverage about the sinister dealings of the new emerging organization, Association of Shunned Helpers (ASH). The viral popularity of the Pokémon Honest Trailers has reached to every region possible. It is uncertain if it is a positive sensation to the citizens or a click-bait marketing that only exists to fill in the gaps for people.
To cover that, Rhonda hosts a segment entitled Honest Trail to Justice, which documents the authorities' investigation of the mysterious organization. She interviews different personalities from regions other than Sinnoh, like Kanto, Hoenn and Kalos.
Speaking of, for her segment this time, she brings a special guest from the European-inspired region.
In a typical talk show format, with two chairs and talking heads, Rhonda introduces the show, "Good morning, Sinnoh. I'm Rhonda. And we're continuing our segment Honest Trail to Justice, where we cover the mystery of the obscure group known as Association of Shunned Helpers and their 'Honest Trailers'. Joining with me right now is Kalos Region's most renowned Pokémon professor, Professor Augustine Sycamore. Greetings to you, Professor! Welcome to Sinnoh."
"Thank you. Likewise. Great to be here in Sinnoh," Professor Sycamore charmingly replies.
"Now, you are readily aware of this secret war. What do you think may be the motives of this?"
"Well, upon studying the nature of the videos, they seem comical in nature. I don't why the content is like that. It's not anything resembling of a threat or even propaganda. It's probably flattery."
"Well, some people label this as a form of trolling."
"You could say that. It's impossible to tell since the group basically verbal-attacked those people in their videos. Especially Ash."
"So, should people take this seriously?"
"People should only be vigilant. And that's it. If they sense any activity done by that group, they should report it immediately."
"And would you assure that your fellow Kalos citizens will be safe from scrutiny?"
"Rest assured, Rhonda, that Kalos will help solve this case, and will not be the subject of their mockery."
However, Rhonda receives cues from her producer via earpiece about another video from the Association of Shunned Helpers. "Hold on." She then tells the professor, "Professor Sycamore, we have received word that another video has been dropped by the Association of Shunned Helpers. May we play it before the viewers? Then, we can do a brief in-depth analysis."
The professor politely agrees to go along. "Sure, let's see what they brought for us this time."
With that, the Honest Trailer premieres during Sinnoh Now.
The Honest Trailer obligingly starts with flashing the screenshot of video requests and the usual title card by Fandom.
The epic voice guy starts out his introductory piece, with flashing accompanying clips to support his piece, "We've been through many regions. We've gone to many quests. We've faced a lot of creatures. We've encountered a lot of allies. We've defeated a lot of enemies. And we've joined many matches. Now that we have reached on the sixth part of the series, we are doing the exact same things from the previous series. Though this time, with a new fresh coat of paint." But upon realizing that this is the exact path that previous seasons took, he comments, "Do I have to repeat myself that this series is getting redundant?" Regardless, he says the title, "Pokémon: X and Y."
The narrator proceeds to the body, which describes the show's setting, "Journey to the region of Kalos, a Europe-inspired region that has Parisian-inspired architecture, though none of the French stereotypes you'll ever see." Noticing the progressiveness, he utters, "Hmmm…"
"And grab your backpack with another journey with Ash Ketchum, who evolved from digressing as a protagonist to acting like a lunatic, and whose new running gag is gloating about science crap that you see in kid shows." Cue montage of Ash gloating over Clemont's inventing mumbo-jumbo.
"Pikachu, who is just there as villain bait and deus ex machina." Cue compilation of Pikachu being captured or having to save the day.
"And of course Team Rocket, who we now count as the good guys because they don't really do anything as heinous as before…" After the video shows the lighter side of Team Rocket, it cuts to a series of clips showing their involvement in the series. "…who still after fifteen years of televisions, are still stalking on a 10-year-old boy and his rotating set of friends." Realizing the unsettling undertones, the epic voice narrator remarks, "Hmmm…best not to think deeper on that."
"But Ash and Pikachu are not alone. Along with a cast of one-episode characters or numerous game Easter eggs that fans would likely recognize, there are new companions like Clemont, the nerd, who acts like a nerd and a loser…" Cue montage of Clemont in his ingenious moments, which gets undercut with pitiful moments.
"Bonnie, a whiny little girl, who acts…like a whiny little girl, spouting out adult stuff like Honey Boo Boo…" Cue Bonnie's moments being a sass bucket.
"Professor Augustine Sycamore, the first Pokemon professor hunk, who, when you think about it, looks creepy when the kids are around him." Cue the clip of Serena and Bonnie trying to loosen the bonds of a tied up Professor Sycamore.
"…and Serena, the token love interest who is finally given the additional backstory as Ash's childhood friend, the arc where she starts out as a nihilist, her own journey to become a Pokémon Showcase Master performer – which is another fancy word for Pokémon contests with stricter standards than Anna Wintour – and probably the most notable makeup transformation of anime history." As the video flashes Serena's best character moments, especially her amazing transformation, the epic voice guy comments, "Didn't see that coming."
"Follow as our quartet of pint-sized heroes journey around Kalos across three season of the X&Y series; with the first season being Ash going through gym battles, the gang encountering a Pokémon phenomenon, something goes horribly wrong and the gang and their allies rally to stop the threat from growing; the second being Ash going through more gym battles, the gang encountering a Pokémon phenomenon, something goes horribly wrong and the gang and their allies rally to stop the threat from growing; and the third being Ash going through the Kalos League, the gang encountering a Pokémon phenomenon, something goes horribly wrong and the gang and their allies rally to stop the threat from growing." Seeing the repetitive nature of each season in X&Y, the narrator grumbles, "When I said if it ain't broke, don't fix it, I do not mean a copy-and-paste template like this. This starts to feel the Michael Bay Transformers series, isn't it?" The video then cuts to a clip from Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, featuring the notorious Skids and Mudflap.
"But not to be outdone with the clichéd storylines, because X&Y has few tricks on their sleeves in the form of the Mega Evolutions, a new evolution phase for Pokémons that is not so much of an evolution but more of an upgrade. Watch as one of the coolest Pokémon in the games and anime history get a shinier transformation with a mecha-inspired armor, cool chrome color scheme and a charging power that is purely super saiyan." The video then cuts to a mash-up of the Mega Evolution transformation moments between clips of Saiyan power ups in Dragon Ball Z.
"Watch as our heroes encounter a bigger enemy in the form of Team Flare, a megalomaniacal villain team, who – let me guess – wants to take over the world?" As the video plays the Bison clip from Street Fighter: The Movie, the narrator frowns, "Ughh, guess nothing better to do." But he switches back, "They are led by the charismatic Lysandre, the big boss with the sideburns of a Pyroar and the personality of an actual Pyroar. Witness as he fulfills a prophecy about sending destruction to all of Kalos, using a legendary Pokémon, because that worked in the past." The video then cuts to a mashup of other villain team failures of previous seasons. "And as his plans fail before his eyes, he will do what any villain of the past hundred years did – presumably fall to his death. Only he did not die that time and recovered, but he was engulfed by Zygrade's power attack. So, did he die?" As the video flashes the presumed death scene of Lysandre, he comments, "Well, that's a twofer. For kids."
"But like any season of the Pokémon anime, the show gave its best element yet: the action. And this season…promised some of that. Follow the gang in their quest for Mega Stones to master Mega Evolution until Ash reaches the Kalos Pokémon League Tournament, where he finally meets his match, Alain, who was way better in the Mega Evolution specials, and finally for once, gets the opportunity in a Pokémon league to…lose?" When the epic voice guy reads that line, he begins to rant over Ash's defeat, again, "WHAT?! ASH LOST?! YOU GUYS TEASED IN THE TRAILER THAT ASH WILL FINALLY WIN IN A POKEMON LEAGUE. AND HE GOT AN ADVANTAGE WITH GRENINJA. BUT HE LOST?! LOST?! HOW? HOW POKEMON COMPANY INTERNATIONAL?! HOW?! GOSH, THIS SHOW SUCKS! AGHHHHH!"
It takes seconds for the narrator to compose himself over the ravings over the infamous Ash defeat in X&Y. As soon as he takes his breath, he continues, "Okay, before you got fed up with how long the series stretches, enjoy this gratifying season with an irritating resolution that at least got spruced up with neat visuals, tolerable characters and passable subplots. But if there is one important takeaway for X&Y, it is that Ash finally got to first base." The Honest Trailer finally shows the famous romantic scene of Serena chasing Ash on the escalator and kissing him. "Well, that took twenty years." But the epic voice guys still finds room to give his commentary, "But wait, isn't he still 10-years-old and Serena is also 10-years-old? So why would she…? You know what, skip it. Let's just go to starring."
Now to the best part of every Honest Trailer:
"Starring:
Ryan Reynolds (Pikachu)
Justice Smith (Ash)
And the Pokémon that chased them in Detective Pikachu (Greninja)
"He blinded me with science!" (Clemont)
Pokeshippers' Worst Nightmare (Serena)
Bonnie & Cried (Bonnie)
Professor Hugh Grant (Professor Sycamore)
The MCU Version of Team Rocket (Team Rocket)
Hamtaro (Dedenne)
C3P-No! (Clembot)
Alain Walker (Alain)
"Alexa, can you play Noivern?" (Alexa)
Mozilla Firefox (Fennekin)
Theodore from Alvin and the Chipmunks(Chespin)
Lacey Baker (Korrina)
Lacey Chabert (Shauna)
Megan Markle (Aria)
Came from Yokai Watch(Tierno)
Angie from Diamond and Pearl(Miette)
Dumb Sawyer (Sawyer)
Carrot Tops (Team Flare)
Z-grade (Zygrade)
Lord Lionheart (Lysandre)
And Transformers: Beast Wars (Every Mega Evolution)"
He also dictates the Honest title: "Pokémon: Ex's & Oh's"
Before the video wraps up, the video shows a small nugget of nitpicking. "What is with this show and bondage?" Cue classic moments of Ash and the gang, or any character tied up.
After that video was aired, Rhonda moves back to the segment courteously, "That is the latest Honest Trailer by the Association of Shunned Helpers. Professor Sycamore, do you have any comments?"
However, the professor is petrified, anime style, over what he witnessed. His jaws are dropped. His eyes are stunned. And his face is filled with embarrassment.
"I guess that's a no," Rhonda ends.