I do not own Naruto or Percy Jackson. They are owned by their respective owners

Chapter 12:Snakes on a woman.

It was deathly silent as the group walked along the jersey riverbank shore which went through the forest they were hiking in. Annabeth, Grover and Percy walked in front while the two 'adults' stayed behind.

Hela looked to the side and saw Naruto smiling slightly.

"What's with that smile?" she asked as they walked. "You were pretty angry a few hours ago."

Naruto shrugged as he stared forward. "Honesty this brings back memories. Hiking in the woods." he said.

"I take it you and your father hiked in the woods a lot?"

"With my dad? No. That bastard turned every fun thing into training." Naruto said bitterly. "My...ex girlfriend liked camping. A lot."

"Hmm," Hummed Hela. "They seem more tense now..." she pointed at the teens in front of them.

"Yep, it's finally catching up how dangerous this quest of theirs really is." Naruto said with a frown.

Hela nodded. "So Naruto, tell me about your childhood." she said. "What was it like?"

Naruto looked up a bit as thought things through. "It was...

Flash back

"My father had sent me to buy some candy at a store nearby. I had bought the candy and was on my way home when suddeny..."

"DODGE!"

He whacked me hard in the face with an Iron baseball bat. He would do this everyday for six months until I was paranoid as fuck and could dodge.

One time I got kidnapped by his enemies and they slit my throat. That was the day I discovered my high speed healing factor. Unfortunately so did my dad. The training I endured from that point on was Hell. My dad didn't hold back cause he knew I could take it. One time he had me climb a mountain...with one hand tied behind my back. And I was nine years old.

"...Okayyy? Tell me about Annabeth's childhood." Hela said a bit freaked out.

"It all started when I bought a new car for myself and a 5 year old Annie a little doggie called Cu. The name Cu is short for Cù Chulainn. Anyway some very bad guys came to our house, beat the shit out of me, killed my best doggo Cù and stole my car."

"Wait? I thought you were a professional killer. Wouldn't it be easy for you to kill them?" Hela asked in confusion.

Naruto stared at her for a moment. "Anywho, I tracked them down and killed them! It was glourise!"

"I don't remember having a dog!" Annabeth yelled out from the front. "And why would I name Cú Chulainn of things."

"You named the dog, why are you asking me!? Besides you were five years old of course you don't remeber Cù!"

"Honesty that sounds like a movie I once saw but can't seem to remeber..." Percy added with a thoughtful look.

"Whatever you brats it happened!"

"Fine tell us another one..." Hela said with chuckle. " This one better be real..." she muttered to her self.

"What was that?!"

"Nothing..."

"Fine..." Naruto glared. "Annabeth took a trip to Paris with her classmates. While their some traffickers managed kidnap her, luckly for me she was on the phone when they kidnapped her. The bastards even picked the phone! I had words for him, I said I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particularly-

"...Set of skills." Hela interrupted with blank stare. "Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you."

Annabeth then cut in. "If you let my daughter go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't-"

Percy also added in. "I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."

"..." Grover had no idea what was going on.

"...We've all seen that one." Hela said with a chuckle.

"Fine be like that!" Naruto pouted as they all laughed.

Hela glanced at Naruto with wide eyes. "Everyone was on edge but he cracked jokes to lift the tension in the air." She then pulled him back and whispered in his ear. "I know what you did. And I find myself liking you even more."

"Sure..." Naruto said unsure. "What a weirdo!" thought the biggest weirdo ever...

As Hela held him close Annabeth stepped closer to Percy and spoke. "Look I..." Her voice faltered. "I appreciate you coming back for us, okay? That was really brave. it's just that if you died...aside from the fact that it would really suck for you, it would mean the quest was over. This may be my only chance to see the real world."

Percy nodded as the talked a bit more.

"I ask...why are you on my back." Naruto asked as he walked. Hela was no longer next to him but was riding his back.

"Shut up you," She wrapped her hands around him and snuggled into his back. "...Besides most men world be happy to say a gal like me was riding them tell they got tired!.

"Whatever..."

"If anyone is going to ride daddy until he gets tired its gonna be me..." Somehow half of Annabeth's face was shadowed with only one glowing grey eye glaring at Hela. "...got that?"

"And she was just normal a minute ago..." Percy cried silently.

Grover on the other hand was playing his flute pipe thing. Honestly to Percy it sounded like an owl getting strangled but he didn't have the heart to tell Grover. His friend looked happy, even though monster ladies almost killed them. For now he would just have to endure the painful-

"Is it just me or does anyone else hear a Parliament of owls having sex?"

Percy face palmed.

"How would you even know what a Parliament of Owls having sex sounds like?" Hela asked in amusement. Naruto just suddenly zoned out.

"That was a day I wish to forget..." For some strange reason one day everytime Naruto would get close to Artemis (back when she hated him) every animal within range would just start humping each other. It was really awkward! but that's a story for another day...

"Looks like old thunder head just cooled down..." Muttered Hela. Thunder storm above had stopped but it was dark due to it probably being evening.

After a few minutes walking, tripping over and walking into trees eventually they found themselves staring at a neon light sign just up ahead of them.

"I...smell junk food!" Grover pointed forward.

They walked closer and by now all could smell it. Through the trees they found themselves stopping at a two laned-road. On the other side was a closed-down gas station, a tattered billboard for the 90s film Jurassic park and one open for business. Which was the source of the Neon light and the greasy fat food smell.

"I honestly doubt people come here..." Naruto said as they stared at the building with neon sign.

The walked up to it and so that it was not a fast food restaurant.

"Must be road shop, wonder what they sell." Naruto said to Hela. He noticed that her grip tightened on him. "Hey you okay?"

"I...just getting some weird vibes from the place is all." 'Should I warn them!? Tell them that a monster lives here!? But they'll ask how I know!' in her head she was panicking.

"Really? We better just pass it by then," Naruto said.

"If you say so daddy..." Annabeth said only for a stomach to protest...loudly.

"Food...Food." Percy was openly drooling as they got closer.

The main building was a long, ware house, surrounded by acres of statuary. The neon sign was red in colour and was in cursive English.

"What does it say," Percy asked with blush of embarrassment. "I can't read it." he looked to Annabeth and she shrugged.

"To me it looks like ATNYU MES GDERAN GOMEN MEPROUIM." Annabeth said as Naruto walked past them. Probably to get a better read.

"It says Aunty Em's Garden Gnome Emporium." he said as Grover nodded.

"That's what it says,"

"How did you learn to..." Annabeth asked shocked. "If you're a demigod then it should be hard for you!"

"I told my father the words usually floated in my head so he took me to a doctor. Once the problem was found I was taken a to an after school programme that helped a lot. " Naruto said as he turned from them to the reader. "Remeber if you have a problem that's affecting you and your life it's good to tell someone. Secking help is not a sign of weakness and one should always swallow down their embarrassment!"

"Who is he talking to..."

"I don't know..."

"Oh look the lights are on! Somebody must be home." Percy said as Grover nodded. "We should see if they'll give us a hand. I think they might have a snack bar."

"Well lets go then!" Annabeth said as they walked.

"I don't know you guys, this place looks a little weired." Grover said as he nervously gulped.

Behind him Naruto's eyes narrowed. Hela didn't like this place and from camp he learnt that Satyrs are guardians or protectors of Demigods. So if their guardian was feeling nervous about this place then, perhaps it was best they leave.

"Hey maybe was Should-" Annabeth and Percy had already gone ahead with Grover following slowly behind. "Fuck..."

They headed over and the first thing they saw was all the stone statues. The front lot was pretty much just a forest of statues: cement animals, cement children, even a cement satyr playing the pipes, which gave Grover the creeps. The place was just odd and the by the looks of it no one visited in a while.

"Bla-ha-ha!" Grover said excitedly as he began to examine the statue before he bleated. "This looks like my Uncle Ferdinand. That is so weird" he said examining it carefully.

"It does look pretty detailed. Whoever made it must be pretty skilled."

When they finished looking at the statue the group went to the front door.

"Do we just knock?" Percy asked getting a shrug from Annabeth.

"I don't know but I really don't trust this place. Something about this place is just off. Let's try somewhere else" Grover asked with Naruto and Hela agreeing. But they guessed Percy and Annabeth's hunger was getting the better of them.

"All I smell is burgers. Aren't you hungry?"Percy said looking at Grover.

"Meat!" he said scornfully. "I'm a vegetarian. When have you ever seen me eat meat?"

"You eat cheese enchiladas and aluminium cans," Percy reminded him.

Grover would have retorted but the door in front of them suddenly creaked open. When the door was fully open standing in front of them was a tall Middle Eastern woman. She was wearing a long black gown that covered everything but her hands, and her head was completely veiled.

She had coffee-colored hands that looked old, but they were well-manicured and elegant. By looking at her perhaps she had been some sort of model and getting old was not something she enjoyed due to the fact that she was completely covered up.

"Children, it is too late to be out all alone. Where are your parents?" she asked with a very thick accent. Listening to her accent Annabeth thought she might have been from the Middle East.

Naruto instantly stepped up. "Sup bitch how you living? We hungry as fucking and are here to eat you digesting food. So you gonna let us in?!"

Annabeth, Percy and Grover stared at Naruto with wide eyes and gaping mouths.

"Really, Starving children?" the woman gasped Dramatically. "Oh, my dears come in, poor hungry children. I am Aunty Em. Go straight through to the back of the warehouse, please. There is a dining area."

The two kids sighed in relief and Naruto's frown deepened. They most definitely should have been sent away or at least yelled at for being rude. But no the woman laughed it off, she almost seemed eager to let them in.

"Daddy what the hell?!" hissed Annabeth angrily.

Naruto said nothing as they walked through warehouse they all saw that it was filled with more statues—people in all different poses, wearing all different outfits and with different expressions on their faces. What was off putting was that many of them looked like they had scared faces plus the eyes of the statues just looked like they were following them.

Eventually they arrived at the back of the warehouse to see a room with a dining table with some chairs around it. They saw that there was a fast-food counter with a grill, a soda fountain, a pretzel heater, and a nacho cheese dispenser. Everything that you could want was there and it was all there's.

"Please take a seat my dears" she said gesturing to the chairs at the table.

"Um," Grover said reluctantly, "we don't have any money, ma'am. We can't really pay you anything."

"No, no, children. No money. This is a special case, yes? It is my treat, for such nice children."

"Thank you, ma'am," Annabeth said before Aunty Em whipped her head around to look at her. When she did Naruto saw a quick look of anger cross her face before she managed to get back under control. Naruto wasn't sure if anyone else noticed it but it was a little off putting.

"Quite all right, Annabeth," she said. "You have such beautiful gray eyes, child." She then turned to look at Naruto. "You young man are very handsome!"

Naruto helped Hela down on a seat as the girl shivered. "Urm thanks..."

Aunty Em then went behind the snack counter and started cooking. While she was away Naruto sprang into action.

"Come dumbass Dave and Awesome Steve! We must go and see that statue of man looking like his having an Orgasm!" He said loudly as he Grabbed Percy and Grover by the back of their shirts and dragged them out of the chairs.

"See look at his face! Like some bitch is sucking his soul out!" Naruto randomly pointed at statue with a horrified look on its face. He then wrapped his arms around the two boys and brought them in. "Awesome Steve," He whispered to Grover but Percy could also hear. "Your uncle Ferdinand did he really look like that statue?"

Confused Grover nodded slowly. "Yeah he did." he answered in whisper.

"I saw you examine the statue, was it exactly what a sayter should look like? Were any details missed?" Naruto asked quickly.

"N-Now that I think about it, it was pretty accurate..."

Percy finally caught on. "Grover...what happened to you uncle Ferdinand?" he asked in a hashed whisper.

"Oh he was killed by the monster Medusa!"

The three paused as it finally sank in. "Every single statue looks like it saw something horrific." Naruto muttered. "And their isn't a god damn Gnome insight..."

"And their are hundreds of them..." Percy added his face pale.

"Okay listen up-OH MAN THIS STATUE IS SO LIFE LIKE-I bait her to get in close and I'll pin her. Then Percy you go in for the kill. Take out your pen under the table to be ready. Grover act as normal as you can. And make sure you're not seated to close to table, you need leg room for you to jump into action, got it Dave?" The boy nodded.

"Naruto, Grover and Percy your food is ready!" the lady called as the all stiffened.

"We didn't even introduce our selves, I've been calling you Dave and Steve..." Naruto muttered as the boys turned. They walked towards the table.

Aunty Em set the trays of food on the table. The boys were hesitant to eat and when Annabeth tried to eat a fry Naruto stopped her hand underneath the table. She was about to ask what was wrong when Hela grabbed fry from her plate and ate it.

"It's really good. Dig in guys," She said.

"Sorry about that Sandra," Naruto said as he rubbed the back of his neck. "We forgot say grace, didn't we guys?"

"Yeah grace!"

"P-praise god?"

They ate their food slowly. Though he was really hungry Percy stayed vigilant. He was waiting for for his time to strike. But things Changed as Aunty Em sat on the opposite side of the table. Her fingers interlaced as she stared at Percy.

"Hey, Aunty this food is fucking delicious!" Naruto yelled as put on his best smile. The stare she was giving percy was unnerving. 'Never charmed a monster lady before, should be interesting."

Oh my thank you," She said.

"You know you can make a fine wife!"

"Oh my I'm flattered." she said with a giggle.

"You know I would ask you out...but I'm ugly and someone as beautiful as you wouldn't want me." Naruto said sadly, pplayiny with his fries as he pouted.

"Oh dear you're so beautiful!

"But the girls I ask out say I'm too ugly!"

"Don't listen to them young man. You are very handsome!" the woman declared passionately.

"Really? Then come over here and prove it!" Naruto said as he stood from his chair and moved to the side. "A woman as beautiful as you telling me I'm handsome is just some dream."

"Then what do you want me to do?" Aunty Em asked confused as she moved off her chair and stood in front of Naruto. he was few inches taller than her.

"Touch me as I touch you," Naruto said with a foxy grin.

"If you say so my dear," She said as her wrinkled rough hands went to his cheeks. "Sorry my hands are a bit rough from all the sculpting."

"No problem you gorgeous milf," Naruto's hands instantly went to her bum. Giving them a firm squeeze. "You're body is perfect!"

"Oh you!" she laughed as Naruto played with ass.

Meanwhile. "That Nacho cheese sure looks delicious," Percy said blankly as got out of his chair

Quietly he made his toward the Nacho cheese dispenser, next where Naruto was. Pen in hand Percy slowly got into a stance.

"This ass is beautiful..." Naruto purred as Aunty Em giggle.

"You like my ass don't cha! In my prime even gods came down just to get a glimpse of it." Said...her last words

Percy sprang into action with a silent battle cry he moved. Swing his hand he felt his pen get slightly heavy as it turned into his sword. Every thing was in slow motion as Aunty Em slowy begun to fall towards Percy. His sword Anaklusmos meeting her neck as it cleanly-

Slice

-sliced through.

The head fell with a thud along with the body.

"I...really hope she was not some super nice but weird lady that we just beheaded." Percy said as he caught his breath.

"Celestial bronze doesn't work on normal people it just passes right through them." Naruto said as they stared at the Head, the body having turned into a golden dust.

"Nice kill," Naruto said with a thumbs up. "I just groped Medusa so...I want to wash my hands." Quickly went to the cooking a area. upon coming back he found Percy writing something on a taped up cardboard box. Upon closer inspection it was

The Gods

Mount Olympus

600th Floor,

Empire state Building.

New York, NY

with best wishes,

PERCY JACKSON

Naruto just laughed While Annabeth looked shocked and Grover looked like he was going to faint.

"Percy they are not going to like that. They will take it as an insult." Grover said hoping to changes his mind.

"Next time they won't be careless as to lose their most powerful weapon!" he growled.

"And send kids to find it for them..."

"That too!" Percy yelled. "So how do I-" the box glowed and vanished in an instant. "Where did it go?"

"Since it's addressed to the gods Hermes probably collected it. it is his Job as the God of Messengers after all so the gods will probably get it soon no doubt." Annabeth answered.

"Okay..." Percy nodded.

"Now thats taken care of, you three come here." The trio Annabeth, Percy and Grover now stood in front Naruto. "You Damn brats!" Naruto's hands instantly went to Annabeth and Percy's heads. His fingers digging into the scalps painfully.

"I'll go rummage for stuff..." Hela said from the side as she went to the cooking area.

"Daddy! Owe, Owe!" Annabeth cried. she tried removing his grip but he would let up.

"Owe what is this!?" Percy asked as he too tried to remove the hand.

"Annabeth," Said girl instantly stopped her struggle. This was bad...he hardly called her Annabeth. "To quote a conversation you and Percy had. '"At camp all you do is train and train' But the real world is where the monster are at. This is the real world and we in counted a monster!"

"That I killed-"

"By pure luck! if Medusa wanted she would have killed us the moment she set her eyes on us. But for some stupid reason all she did was feed us. And you two idiots didn't even notice that something was off." Naruto said with scowl on his face.

"What do you want from us? Demigods can't sense monsters!" Percy yelled angrily.

"Thats true and who pre tell do we have that can?" Naruto forcefully turned their heads to Grover who jumped at the stare.

"Grover has a strong sense of smell, he is able to tell when monsters, gods demigods or other creatures are nearby..." Annabeth said slowly as her eyes widened. "I see..."

"The moment we got here Hela and Grover had expressed their discomfort multiple times but all you brats thought of was staffing your faces." Naruto's grip tightened. "So the next time the guy who can sense monsters says he feels nervouse about a place we hear him out, got it!?"

"Yes Father!"

"...Yes sir!"

"Good," He said as he let them go. "And you Grover, don't doubt yourself. If you feel we are walking into a trap then spit it out!"

"Y-Yes sir!"

"Good, now lets go help Hela with picking anything we might need!"

The End

So hey guys! It's been a minute! I just want to wish you a happy new year from this story. I know this chapter short up I just wanted to just to get it over with. Truth be told I had a hard time figuring out how to go about this chapter, Cause the first time had a big fight scene but then I went and read this part in the box. And I was like...my Naruto could spot that Grover was feeling uneasy. Also Hela was out of commission because...You just have to find out next time. Special thanks to my reviewers, Followers, favouriters (is that even a word) and people who don't do any of the things above but read the story. You are all appreciated. my Fav count is currently in the 600s and my Follows are also in 600s I'm honestly excited I'm close to 1000. please help with the dream and follow, Fav and review kindly. kind words mean a lot and make a difference.I was honesty Bored out of my mind, telling myself there is nothing to when Have ton of staff to do. out of nowhere a received a notification, PM from Zack Lynch While reading his pm I noticed their was one more on top his recent one. He, along with several others have been waiting a ass time for an update. It brought smile to face and lit a fire under my ass! So to my loyal readers, give me time to skim the book once more and once thats done it's weekly up date!

Anywho in other news teamfourstar are no longer doing DBZA sad right? I added in a tribute to that classic abridged series, hope you spot it!So this is Chris from Zambia sayingbyebye