The day seemed to fly by. The newlyweds checked in with Duncan before eating breakfast together and returning to Gilmore's tent for some final alone time before being summoned to the long anticipated Joining.
The recruits gather in the half ruined pavilion overlooking the valley below. Torches crackle and flicker in the slight breeze as they all awaited Duncan to arrive. Ana glances around, the anxious looks on Gilmore and Jory's faces far from reassuring. She nudges Gilmore. "I'm wishing we would have left when we had the chance." She whispers with a frown. "I don't know what it is, but all this secrecy doesn't sit right with me."
"I wonder if they'll make us fight each other. From what Alistair has been saying, this'll be our final test." Jory mutters.
"I don't want to do this." She hisses as the familiar wave of nausea washes over her. She refrains from gagging as she places a hand on her belly as though that would help settle it. Maker's breath. I'll really have to stick my head into this yolk.
"Good. I'm glad you're all here."
All the recruits turn to see Duncan walk up the stairs and comes to stand before them. Alistair steps forward and they converse quietly before Duncan places a large silver chalice on the stone pedestal near the center of pavilion. Opening a vial of red liquid, the recruits watch as he pours it in before turning to face them.
"Finally, we come to the Joining." He says solemnly, his eyes flicking to each of the worried recruits in turn. "The Grey Wardens were founded during the first Blight, when humanity was on the verge of annihilation."
Alistair risks a glance at the others, his gaze falling on Ana. His jaw tightens. This is it.
"So it was the first Grey Wardens drank of darkspawn blood and mastered their taint."
Ana's eyes widen and she looks over at Alistair with a scathing look before turning to Duncan. "Are you joking? Surely you're joking."
Duncan's expression remains flat as Jory shakes his head. "We're… going to drink the blood of those… those creatures? The same ones whose blood killed Daveth?"
Duncan nods. "As the first Grey Wardens did before us and as we've done before you. This is the source of our power and victory."
Swallowing, Ana grips Gilmore's hand as she looks up at him, her fear reflecting back at her. "Rory…"
"Those who survive the Joining become immune to the taint." Alistair adds. "We use it to sense the darkspawn and use it to slay the archdemon."
Ana's head snaps in Duncan's direction. "Those who survive? What the hell does that mean?"
The look on the elder Warden's face did little to reassure her. "Not all who drink the blood will survive and those who do will be forever changed. It is the price we pay to be able to do what we do." His eyes shift to Ana who grips Gilmore's arm. "This is why the Joining is a secret."
"I don't want to do this, Rory." Ana whispers, her hands and lip trembling as she looks up at him. Tears line her eyes, making her luminescent blue eyes shine even more. "Let's leave. Let's run from here and never look back."
Hearing this, Duncan steps forward and shakes his head. "I'm sorry, Ana, but there is no leaving now. I promised your parents that I would look after you. My protection is limited unless you join the Wardens, as your father promised you would."
"No." She shakes her head violently. "This is my life. I loved my parents dearly but even they have no say now."
"Ana."
She turns to look at her husband's face as he places a hand on hers.
"Sweetheart, we need to be brave." He whispers. "He's right. This is our destiny. He said there's a chance of not surviving. Perhaps we'll be the lucky ones."
"And what if we're not? Or what if only one of us live?" She asks, shaking her head. "I can't and won't live without you!"
The other men watch as the knight turns to face her. Gently caressing her face, he leans in for a tender kiss. "Whatever happens, remember that I always have and always will love you, Ana. You are the light of my life."
Tears free and spill down her cheeks as a choked sob escapes. "I love you too, Rory. Always will."
Pressing a final kiss to her forehead, Gilmore steps back and turns to Duncan with a nod. "I'm ready. I'll go first."
Ana covers her mouth with her sleeve to muffle her sobs but does little to help.
"I admire your sacrifice, Ser Gilmore." Duncan says. "However, we speak only a few words prior to the Joining, the same words that were said by the very first Wardens." He motions to his junior warden. "Alistair, if you would?"
His eyes still on the emotional Ana, Alistair feels his stomach knot up but nods. Bowing his head, he waits as Duncan and the other two men follow suit before clearing his throat.
"Join us, brothers and sisters. Join us in the shadows where we stand, vigilant. Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn."
He pauses, guilt eating at him as he tries to block out the sobs coming from nearby. Jory looks at her and then Gilmore whose head is still down before he glances worriedly at the giant chalice of blood.
"And should you perish," Alistair continues, "know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten and that one day we shall join you."
He raises his head once more as do the others and he nods to Duncan. Swiveling around, Duncan retrieves the chalice and turns back, his gaze landing on Ser Gilmore. "Ser Gilmore, step forward."
Ana's sobs get louder and he gives her hand a squeeze and sad smile before walking up to Duncan. Taking the chalice, he takes a deep breath to ready himself before tipping it and taking a long drink. He winces at the taste before handing the chalice back. Everyone watches and waits as Gilmore stands there.
The pain starts from deep in his stomach. Ana watches in horror as her lover groans and scratches at his head before he begins screaming and clawing at his skin. As soon as Duncan sees the lad's eyes go pure white, his face drops. Gilmore suddenly stops screaming before finally collapsing onto the cobblestone, his eyes blank and blood streaming down the side of his mouth.
"Rory?" Ana says, her voice small as she watches his lifeless body. Her knees feel weak and she can feel them buckling beneath her as she steps forward. A few feet away, they finally give way and she collapses to her knees as new tears stream down her cheeks. Crawling over to him, her lip quivers as she touches his face. "My love?" She squeaks, knowing well that he can no longer hear her. The sobs she was trying to hold back earlier tear from her throat as she flings her body over Gilmore's chest. Her cries grow in volume and agnony, clinging to him for dear life.
"Maker's breath." Jory mutters, making the sign of the Maker.
"I'm so sorry, Ser Gilmore." Duncan mutters. "You were one of the best and bravest. Your sacrifice will not be in vain." Slowly he turns and Jory begins to back up, his eyes wide and wild looking as he reaches for his sword. "Step forward, Ser Jory."
"But… I have a wife, a child! Had I known…." He stammers, pointing his sword at him.
"As I told Ana, there is no turning back." Duncan says, his gaze darkening.
Jory shakes his head, his head moving back and forth as Alistair and Duncan start toward him.
"Jory, calm down." Alistair says, unhelpfully.
"No! You ask too much!" Jory exclaims. "There's no glory in this!"
Setting aside the chalice, Duncan's gaze stays trained on Jory as he also unsheathes his curved sword at his hip. Jory lunges at him and their swords clash against one another until Duncan is able to run him through. Jory gasps is shock as Duncan holds him close, his expression sympathetic. "I am sorry." He mutters. He pulls his sword out and Jory slumps to the ground with a groan. As blood pools around him, Alistair frowns and looks up as Duncan wipes the blood off onto his sleeve.
"Poor soul." The lad comments.
"You bastard!" Both men turn to see Ana, sitting up with her hair in disarray, her eyes red and Gilmore's blood smeared on her cheek. "Now I see you Wardens for what you really are. You're just murderers!"
"Ana, please try to understand…" Duncan begins calmly before she cuts him off.
"No! Don't try to use your honeyed words. You're a murderer! You just murdered Ser Jory and you…." She stops as she gets choked up. "You killed Ser Gilmore."
"Ana, I am sorry for your loss." Duncan frowns. "I know he meant a lot to you but like I said, this is the price we pay. Now, come forth. It's your turn."
She shakes her head. "Go to hell. There's been enough death for one day."
"Ana…"
"Leave. Me. Alone." She hisses.
With his hand on his sword, Alistair shoots Duncan a wary glance.
"Ana, you must go through the Joining. If you don't…" Duncan begins only to be cut off.
"You'll kill me?" Ana sneers. "Then do it. Get it over with." When Duncan doesn't move, she returns to sobbing over her lover's body.
Tentatively, Alistair moves up beside Duncan. "What should we do?" He whispers.
Duncan watches in silence for a moment before sighing. "Leave her be."
"But Duncan…"
He turns his gaze to meet the lad's. "She will take her Joining. Right now she is wracked with grief." Sheathing his curved sword, he turns around. "Keep an eye on her. I'll be right back."
Alistair's eyes widen with alarm as he opens his mouth to object but his mentor quickly descends down the steps and disappears.
When he returns, he's followed by an equally grim-faced Fergus. They climb the steps to where Alistair is sitting beside a pillar. He looks up as Duncan motions toward Ana who has since stopped crying and was now silently sitting beside Roderick, holding his hand as she stared down at his lifeless body.
She couldn't cry anymore. Her head was pounding and she felt numb. Roderick's hand, which recently was so warm when he touched her face, now felt like ice. Yet she couldn't let go. To let him go would mean that she was one more alone.
Duncan stayed back with Alistair and they watched as Fergus slowly approached his sister.
Kneeling beside her, he touches her shoulder. "Ana," He says softly. "You need to let him go, sweetheart. He's gone."
Without looking away, she shakes her head. "I can't." She whispers. "I can't let go of him."
Reaching out, he places his hand on hers. "Come on. Let go and hold onto me." Holding her hand firmly, he pulls it away from Gilmore's as she chokes back a sob. As Gilmore's lifeless hand falls from hers, she collapses into her brother's chest, her body shaking as she allows her grief to crash over her like a wave. She clings tightly to him for dear life.
He scoops her up in his arms, muttering soothing words and starts over to the where the other men are. Alistair scrambles to his feet.
"I think it'd be best if she stays with me for the meantime." Fergus says. "I'll send somebody to your tent to retrieve her things." As Duncan nods, Alistair watches as Fergus descends down the stairs once more and heads back to the camp. The lad turns a questioning glance to his mentor.
"What if she doesn't return to take her Joining?" He frowns. "She's now aware of what the Joining consists of."
"She'll return." Duncan simply replies. He glances at the lad. "Fergus is aware of his father's promise and is a honorable man. He may not know the dangers associated with the Joining but he will allow her to mourn for her loss and then will convince her to return."