It was all therapeutic. Every morning, Ana rose from her bed and drank one of the vials Hawke left for her to help with the damned nausea that seemed to never leave her. After, she'd spend the a portion of her morning in the chantry tent in prayer before meeting with Hawke at the mess tent. Grief still tugged at her and weighed her down but Hawke's light-hearted demeanor and shameless flirting were oddly comforting in the past week.

Ana breaks her hard roll in half. Normally she would have rather gone hungry than eat the food offered in camp but after barely being able to keep anything down for a week, the hard bread and thick stew was a welcome change.

Ana's eyes flick up to watch Nate as he shoveled the stew in his mouth. A sad smile forms as she's reminded of Roderick when he first arrived in camp. The rabbit Hawke offered to him didn't last long as he wolfed it down.

Feeling her gaze, he pauses and looks up at her. "Have I offended you with my barbaric manner, my lady?" He smirks.

She shakes her head. "No. You just remind me of Rory." She says, the tears pricking her eyes. She swallows and sighs. "Sorry."

"Don't be."

Looking down at the stew in her bowl, she felt her stomach knot up. "Fergus spoke of the damn Joining again."

Hawke raises a brow. "Oh?"

She nods. "For a week now, he's been hinting at our father's promise and how I have an obligation." She frowns. "It's apparent that he doesn't like it any more than I do but... I'm scared, Nate."

He nods sympathetically. "Death is scary."

Ana shakes her head. "It's not so much the death part. When Rory died, he was in such agony. His screams…" She covers her mouth as tears begin to form. Nate reaches out and places a hand on hers comfortingly. She glances down before pulling away from him. As thankful as she was for his company, it still felt odd to take comfort in his touch, no matter how friendly it was.

"Perhaps..." Nate begins before trailing off. Ana raises a brow.

"What?"

His dark blue eyes meet hers and she sees the hesitation. He sighs. "I was going to say that perhaps you can take something to numb the pain." He shrugs. "Although, I doubt there's anything that will dull the pain of darkspawn taint. If there was, I'm sure the Wardens would have already been using it."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that." Ana mutters bitterly. "They probably get off on it." With a sigh of her own, she abruptly rises to which Hawke looks up at her expectantly. "Well, thank you for everything, Nate. Seeing as I have little to live for these days, I might as well get it over with." Before Nate can respond, Ana becks Much at her feet and starts walking away.

After parting with Hawke following their meal, Ana's heart pounds in her chest as she makes a beeline to Duncan's tent. Without waiting for Duncan's guards to announce her or ask permission, she strides through the entrance with Much at her heels.

Duncan's brows jump up as he sees her. Much to her embarrassment, he wasn't alone.

Cailan, who only moments ago was finding himself falling asleep as Loghain described in excruciating detail his plans for training the soldiers and possible strategies for the battle, eyed her with amusement while the other men glared at her.

Before Duncan can speak, Cailan smiles at the welcome distraction.

"Ah, Lady Cousland. What a wonderful surprise."

Ana's cheeks burn as she dips into a curtsy. "Forgive me, your Majesty. I didn't mean to interrupt."

"Yet you did." Loghain sneers. He lets out an annoyed sigh as Cailan dismissively waves his comment away.

"Nonsense, my dear." He says cheerfully, motioning for her to rise. "It's always wonderful to see you."

"Ana, is what you need an urgent matter?" Duncan asks, levelly.

Her eyes flick between the men before returning to Duncan and she shakes her head.

"I just came to speak of Warden matters."

"Then you can wait outside. I will inform my guards of when you may enter."

"Or we can hold our talks at bay for now." Cailan says, winking at her. "I'm quite famished anyways so we can reconvene afterwards."

Both Duncan and Loghain begin to argue but Cailan raises a hand and that's the end of it. Loghain mutters something under his breath as Cailan rounds the the table to stand before Ana. Taking her hand, he presses a kiss to the back of it as he lifts his eyes to meet hers.

"I hope to see you again soon, my dear." He practically purrs before releasing her hand. "Perhaps one of these nights, you will join me for supper and perhaps some entertainment?"

Ana feels her cheeks burn but she bows her head. "I would be honored, Your Majesty. Thank you."

Ana stands there awkwardly as both the king and his commander exit the tent along with the various other members of the king's entourage.

For a long time, neither of them say anything. Reigning in his irritation, Duncan finally speaks. "It's been quite a while since we last spoke." He says. "How have you been?"

"I've been better." Ana replies. "Afterall, I did recently lose the love of my life after losing almost all of my family and being run out of my home."

It came off as bitter sarcasm which Duncan didn't seem too pleased with. Regardless, he said nothing about it.

"As I'm sure Fergus has told you, I've asked him to convince you to finally go through your Joining."

"I've heard." She raises her chin slightly. "Before I give my answer, what if I refuse?"

She felt a chill run up her spine as his gaze darkens.

"Now that we know that Fergus is alive and well, I believe you saw the answer to that during the last Joining."

While she expected such an answer, to actually hear it from his lips was shocking. Her jaw drops. "You'd kill me?"

Duncan nods, his expression betraying his regret. "It is never something I wish to do but the way of our Order requires the Joining ritual to remain a secret, at all costs." Noting her reaction, his expression softens. "What happened to Ser Jory was unfortunate…"

"Unfortunate?" Ana hisses. "You murdered him!"

"He drew his weapon and refused to partake in the ritual."

Ana's eyes flashed. "He was scared! We all saw how much agony Rory was in. The very thought of that already makes me not want to do it!" She balls her fists at her side. Much picks up on the tension between them and his ears flatten against his head and he bears his teeth with a menacing growl. Duncan ignores him as he watches the grief begin to peek through her hardened expression. "I have to know; Why was I spared?"

The elder warden's brows furrow. "What?"

"Both Jory and I expressed our refusal to take the Joining yet he was killed and I was not. Why?"

He shrugs. "Like I said, he drew a weapon."

"So if I pulled out a dagger, I'd be dead too?"

Duncan remains silent and she strides up to him, making Much growl menacingly at the Warden. She narrows her eyes at him.

"Answer me!" She hisses. Even as his gaze pierces through her, he doesn't utter the reason that hung between them; Without knowing how to wield a weapon, she would not have been much of a threat.

Angry tears begin to prick the back of Ana's eyes as Much begins flat out barking. Unable to take it, she snaps at Much to stop. Her hound immediately stops and looks up at her with its big brown eyes. Seeing her expression, he whines and nudges her hand gently with his snout before licking it. Guilt grips her and she collapses to her knees before him and wraps her arms around him, burying her face in his fur.

"I'm so sorry." She mutters. As she pulls away to wipe away the rogue tears that broke free, he licks her face. A hint of a smile forms as she brings up her hand to scratch him behind his ears lovingly.

Duncan clears his throat and her smile fades. Decision time.

Pressing a kiss to her hound's forehead, she rises once more to face him. "Fine." She sniffs, wiping her face with her sleeve,

Duncan raises a brow. "Fine?"

She nods; "I'll go through your Joining." Turning her gaze to Much, her expression softens. "I am a single flame surrounded by the ashes of my former life anyways." She mutters. She turns her gaze onto him once more. "With luck, perhaps my suffering will come to an end and I will become ashes as well."

Before Duncan can respond, Ana motions for Much to follow and leaves the tent.

"You're starting to look better."

Ana looks up from her book as Fergus enters the smiles at her. "Well, you're looking better."

She shrugs. "The potions that Hawke has been giving me seem to be helping." She sits up and watches as Fergus removes his cloak and boots. "I spoke with Duncan."

He pauses with his boots still in hand. "Yeah?"

She nods. "I'm going through with Father's promise. I'll be taking my Joining for the Wardens."

Fergus turns away from her as he feels grief grip his heart. "I see." He manages to say with an even voice. "When will that take place?"

She waits a moment before responding. "I have no idea. I imagine he needs a couple days or so to prepare." As she says this, she envisions the chalice and its revolting contents. Her stomach lurches and she takes a deep breath to calm it.

Much nudges her hand and she smiles sadly at him. "Fergus?"

She glances up as he turns around. "Yes?"

"If anything should happen to me-"

He flinches as though struck; "Ana, don't-"

Her lower lip trembles as she places a hand on Much's head and continues. "If anything should happen to me, promise me you'll take care of Much."

When Fergus looks at her again, his blue eyes are bright with unshed tears. He hesitantly nods. "I will."

Setting her book aside, she jumps up from her cot and strides over, embracing her brother. So it begins.

Ana felt the icy breath of death on her neck, sending a chill down her spine as she gazed down at the neat handwriting. When she had awakened, she could already feel the dread that sat in her stomach like a lump of cold fat which did little for the wave of nausea that had become her constant companion. WIth shaking hands, she retrieves one of Hawke's vials and knocks it back. Immediately after swallowing, she collapsed onto her bed as sobs wracked her body.

Following her talk with Duncan where she agreed to continue with her Joining, she believed that she would have at the very least a week to prepare herself. Yet as she sat up on her cot, the remainder of what little sleep she managed to have still clinging to her eyes, she found the neatly sealed parchment with her death warrant inside.

Managing to pull herself out of Fergus' tent, she absently walks to the mess tent, oblivious to her surroundings as they pass by in a blur. It isn't until she's woken from her trance by Nate's concerned urging. She blinks at him as though seeing him for the first time.

"Ana, are you alright?" He frowns. "You're looking a bit pale."

She nods. "I'm fine." She says quietly.

"Are you sure? I greeted you but you looked straight through me."

Her brows furrow slightly. "Oh…. I'm sorry."

Her eyes cast downward to see the bowl and wooden cup on the table before her. She couldn't remember getting food, nor sitting down. Her eyes widen and she glances around herself frantically as Hawke watches with a concerned expression on his handsome face. "What's wrong?"

Finally seeing her hound lying under the table near her feet, she lets out a sigh of relief. Thank the Maker.

"Ana?"

She looks up to meet his gaze. "Sorry. I was worried that I lost Much or something."

Hawke's frown deepens. "Has something happened? You don't seem yourself."

With a sigh, she nods. "Last night I spoke with Duncan."

"And?"

Ana swallows as her eyes cast downward. "I agreed to go through with Joining."

Hawke purses his lips. "I see." There's a long pause. "When?"

When she looks up at him once more, he sees her eyes brimmed with tears. "Tonight." Her lip trembles. "This could be our last breakfast together. You've been such a wonderful friend to me-"

Hawke shakes his head. "Don't talk like that."

"Why not? You said so yourself; Not many survive the Joining."

"You might."

She scoffs at this before sniffing. Bringing her sleeve up, she wipes her eyes. "Anyways, I have a request for you."

"Anything. Name it and it's yours."

Reaching across the table, she touches his hand before meeting his gaze. "When it's time for my Joining, will you please look after Much? I feel like it would be best for him not to be there."

Nate stiffly nods. "Of course."

"And…" Her voice catches. "And if I perish, I want you to bring him to my brother. If I can leave Fergus with just one thing to remember me by, it's Much."

Hearing his name, Ana feels Much raise his head and lick her hand beneath the table.
"Please promise me." She sniffs.

Nate smiles sadly as he places his other hand on hers. "I promise."

She returns his smile. "Thank you, Nate." She wipes her eyes once more. "So, what would you say to hunting together one last time?"

He gives a low chuckle. "I doubt it'll be our last but sure. Let's do it."