Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Attack on Titan

Rated M for gore violence, language, and sexuality

Enjoy

Mountains of Wall Rose, 845...

"That's it. Breathe. Breathe. Now, push!"

Doctor Grisha Jaeger knelt before a bed. The woman's legs were spread out in front of him. She followed his instructions, breathing and pushing. She was covered in sweat from the strain and the pain. She cried out as she pushed again. Grisha guided the newborn, hooking his fingers under the child's little arms and pulling. The woman gave another push and the baby slipped all the way out. The woman collapsed onto the pillows behind her, relieved from the pain and pressure. Grisha held the child in his hands. The baby's little face was scrunched up. He lowered his gaze to the baby's sex. "It's a boy."

The woman pushed herself up on her elbows. She smiled at the sight of her son. Even though he was covered in blood and mucus, he was the most amazing thing she had ever seen. "He's beautiful."

Grisha smiled down at the boy. He recognized the baby's features; the shape of the nose and eyes. But, the baby had his mother's features, too. His skin wasn't copper like hers, but he had the same violet eyes, the same chin. Grisha handed the child to the mid-wife as he cut the umbilical cord and guided the woman with expelling the after-birth. The boy was cleaned and swaddled. He barely cried, only fussing. Once he was placed in the woman's arms, he calmed down. The woman smiled down at her newborn. "He's perfect."

Grisha sat down beside her, smiling softly. "Have you thought of a name?"

The woman nodded. "Alix."

She gently caressed her son's cheek. His eyes fluttered then closed again. Grisha's smile faltered a bit. "He looks like his brother. It's uncanny."

The woman raised her head to look at Grisha. She no longer smiled. She shyly asked, "will he ever get to meet his brother?"

Grisha sighed. He reached over and gently touched the baby's soft head. "I'm sorry, Nadia."

Nadia looked away towards the window. She took a deep breath. "I understand."

Grisha placed his hand on her thigh. He loved his wife. He loved his son. But, he loved Nadia, too. Grisha sighed. He knew it was wrong for him to feel this way. He got up and walked over to his tools. "I must go. The midwives will stay here to look after you. This delivery went smoothly so I'm positive you can return home tomorrow."

Nadia furred her brows in sadness. "I see. Are you heading back to Shiganshina?"

"Not quite," he confessed. "I have to head north into Wall Sina for an errand. Then I'll travel back to Trost to check up on your sister, Katya. She should be due in a couple months."

Nadia tensed at the sound of her sister's name. Alix sensed his mother's discomfort and fussed slightly. Nadia calmed herself and rocked him in her arms. "Tell my sister I wish good fortune on her and her unborn child."

"You could tell her yourself if you'd visit."

Nadia shook her head. "It's not possible. I have my mother and now my son to take care of."

Grisha noted the change in her tone, but chose to ignore it. "I'll be back in a few months to check up on you both."

Nadia said nothing. She instead focused on the cherub-face of her newborn. It was hard to stay mad or feel anything negative the longer she stared at him. He made her feel nothing but love. It burst from her chest. He was perfection. Grisha paused by the door. "I promise, Nadia. I will return."

"I know," she whispered.

Shiganshina District, Wall Maria...

The Scouts rode back into the district with their heads lowered. Most of them were wounded and full of despair. Erwin rode to Commander Keith's right side. He noticed a young boy with teal-green eyes smiling at him in awe. But, Erwin looked away. He didn't want to be admired. Not now. Raisa rode behind Erwin. Her hair was longer now, reaching the bottom of her shoulder blades. Her braids were tousled from flying and fighting. Her face was dark with silent, internalized despair. The convoy came to a stop as a middle-aged woman approached Commander Keith at the front. "Moses! Moses?"

She glanced around the soldiers, searching. "Beg your pardon. Where is my son? He should be with you all. Oh, please tell me he made it."

Keith stared down at her. "I wish I had better news." He glanced at Section Commander Vaughn. "Give it to her."

The woman's eyes grew wide as Section Commander Vaughn placed a small, wrapped up thing in her arms. She quickly unwrapped it, revealing the severed hand of Moses. The woman gasped and burst into tears. Keith softened his tone. "I'm sorry. It's all that was left of him."

The woman hugged her son's arm as she fell to her knees. The street was quiet save for her sobs. Keith knelt down in front of her. The woman sniffled. "He...he did good, right? He was brave? Tell me my son stood his ground to the bitter end. Tell me his death meant something!"

Keith stared at her in shock. "He was brave..." he began, but his confident tone soon disappeared. "His sacrifice...meant nothing. It's ever the same. The day was lost! We've gained nothing! Your son died because of me! I sent him to his death! I sent them all to their deaths! It's all been for nothing!"

The soldiers were silent, staring down at their Commander. The woman's family came for her, guiding her away. Keith mounted his horse once more, and led the Scouts through the district. Raisa slumped her shoulders as she glanced down at the necklace wrapped around her hand. It was a simple gold chain, but it was the cherished possession of Captain Donar. The Scouts moved out. They left Shiganshina and continued on to a small village on the road to Trost. The soldiers dispersed, either seeking solace or medical attention. Levi noticed Raisa disappearing atop the roof. He had tried to speak with her on the route back, but she had remained silent. Levi stared up at the building. He turned to look at Erwin who was leading his horse to the stables. "Raisa went up there."

Erwin glanced at the top of the building. "It's a habit of hers."

"Are you gonna say anything to her?"

"No," he replied bluntly which earned him a disapproving frown from Levi. "What is there to say? Sometimes the best thing to do is to do nothing."

With that, he continued on to the stables. Levi tapped his finger against his thigh. Erwin had a point. He turned to continue inside to find some food, but something pulled at him. He marched right around and fired an anchor to the top of the building. He flew up and landed on the roof. Raisa was sitting on the other end, facing the open fields. She said nothing as Levi walked over and sat down beside her. He actually liked the view. It was serene, pretty. Then, Raisa finally spoke. "What?"

Levi said nothing. "What do you want?" she growled. Still, he said nothing. She threw her hands up in the air. "Look, I get it! I know how shameful it is. My entire squad died except for me. All of them died except me! I told Captain Donar not to engage the cluster of abnormals, but he didn't fucking listen to me. He ordered us to attack. And what happened? What happened?!"

She clenched her fist, the gold chain bit into her skin. The memory of her comrades all being eaten replayed in her head. "They would still be alive...if Donar had just listened to me."

She leaned forward, fighting back the tears blurring her vision. Her whole body shook with anger and sorrow. "What's wrong with me? I'm not like this. I'm never like this. I know they all fought honorably. They always fought like every day was their last. So...so why am I...?"

Levi watched her break down. She was right. He never saw her so distraught. He sighed. "Sorry. I don't really have an answer for that."

Thoughts of Furlan and Isabel flashed through his mind. But, they weren't the only ones. So many have died since he lost his friends. He placed his hand on Raisa's shoulder. "Some deaths hit you harder than others. And there will be more. But you have the strength to carry on. You carry the memories of your fallen comrades. That's what keeps you going."

Raisa had raised her head to look at him, tears streaming down her face. Levi removed his hand and stood up. "No one blames you for their deaths, and you shouldn't blame yourself either."

He turned to leave, but Raisa jumped to her feet. She grabbed his arm. "Wait!"

A cold wind suddenly swept through, blowing Raisa's hair off her face and drying her tears. Levi met her gaze. Whenever it was night, he avoided looking at her. Her appearance was strange in the darkness. But now, she seemed different. Her purple eyes glinted with various emotions. She seemed desperate, impulsive. He opened his mouth to speak, but the sound of someone flying up on top of the roof pulled their attention. "Lieutenant Raisa! Levi!" Moblit called as he ran over to them. "Commander Keith has given the order to mobilize! We're turning back to Shiganshina."

"What? Why?" Raisa asked, letting go of Levi's arm.

"Wall Maria," Moblit said with terror in his eyes, "has been breached."

Outside Shiganshina District, Wall Maria...

Jessamine hurried through the crowd of frightened people. She dragged her daughter along behind her, gripping the girl's hand tight. Everyone was gathered on the pier, shouting and begging to be let onto the ferry. Jessamine wormed her way through, ducking under flailing arms. Her daughter called out to her, crying about the tightness of her grip, but she ignored her child. She managed to reach the front of the crowd. Garrison soldiers were holding the people back, claiming the ferry to be full. She noticed a familiar face. "Henry!"

Henry looked her way and his eyes widened. She waved at him as she shouted his name. Henry ordered the men to let her through. Jessamine squeezed between the soldiers with her daughter, ignoring the foul cursing from the others. Henry stopped her from taking another step. "Jessamine, why are you still here?!"

"We couldn't get out! I had to sneak past the guards at the inner gate." She took a breath to calm herself. "You have to let us on!"

"I can't! It's already at capacity."

"Please, Henry," she begged. "If we stay, we'll die. Please! I've never asked you for anything."

"I can't, Jess. This ferry is about to take off." He placed his hands on her shoulders and started pushing her back. "There's nothing I can do. You have to go with the wagons."

"That's suicide-"

"Jess, I can't let you two on." The ferry sounded the horn. Henry glanced around at the soldiers. Jessamine pulled her daughter forward. The movement was sudden and hard; the poor girl almost fell. "Then take her."

Henry hesitated. The little girl was frightened. Her blue eyes were full of confusion and terror, and her cheeks held tear stains. She was smaller than most children. Henry gritted his teeth. "Fine. We'll let her on."

He stepped away to stop the soldiers from pulling the loading platform. Jessamine knelt down and turned her daughter to face her. She gripped the girl's arms tight, squeezing hard. "Listen to me. You're getting on this ferry. I can't go with you-" the girl shook her head "-stop it! Listen to me! You have to stay strong. I won't be able to protect you anymore!"

The girl listened intently as tears flowed once again. Jessamine grabbed her face. "Your name is Raske, do you hear me? Vanessa Raske! Say it! What's your name?!"

The girl sniffled and blubbered. "R-Raske. Vanessa...Raske."

"Good." Jessamine noticed Henry walking back. She hugged her daughter and whispered something into her ear. Henry reached them and grabbed Vanessa's shoulders. "She needs to get on now!"

"No. No! Mama! Mama, no!" Vanessa tried to fight against his hold as she was dragged towards the boat. Jessamine watched helplessly as Henry loaded Vanessa onto the boat. Vanessa still called out for her. Jessamine let her own tears flow. Henry walked back to her and helped her up, guiding her back to the dock. The soldiers pulled the loading platform away, and the ferry began to roll forward. Jessamine could still see Vanessa. The girl was still calling for her. She almost fell over the edge, but a boy pulled her back. Jessamine hugged herself as she whispered. "What have I done?"

Scouts Headquarters, Ehrmich District, Wall Sina...

Levi leaned against the wall. Everyone was celebrating Erwin's promotion as the new Commander of the Scouts Regiment. Erwin's first order of business was promoting others, and declaring he would re-structure the Scouts for more efficient expeditions. He glanced out the window and noticed the balcony a ways down. He pushed himself off the wall and left the great room. Compared to the loud chatter inside, the hallway was dead quiet. He walked to the end and found the door to the balcony. Outside, Raisa was leaning on the guard rail, staring out over the city. He quietly shut the door behind him, but she noticed him anyways. "Hey, Lieutenant. Party not wild enough for you?"

"Seems idiotic to have a party," he said as he walked up beside her. "Considering Wall Maria fell a couple weeks ago."

Raisa shrugged. Levi leaned on the guard rail as well. He was close to her, but they weren't touching. "I've heard the government is organizing some sort of operation to retake Wall Maria."

"I heard the same," she said with a sigh. "Hell of a time to get promotions, huh?"

"Are you still part of Erwin's squad?"

"No." Raisa took a swig of her ale, and took a step to her right, closing the space between them. "I'm a Captain, now. I get to lead my own squad. I'll be reporting to Mike since he's a Section Commander, now. I'm pretty sure Erwin is gonna have you take my place as his bodyguard."

Levi snorted in disappointment, taking a step to his left. Their elbows now touched. "What a great honor."

"Relax. It's not as bad as it sounds." She carefully leaned against him, pressing her shoulder against his. "You'll probably get promoted to Captain in no time."

"I don't know about that. I'm not as loyal as you." He drank from his mug. The ale was smooth and bitter.

"It's not about being loyal, it's about-"

"Kissing his ass?"

Raisa snorted obnoxiously. "Is that what you think I do?" She chuckled, shaking her head. "Shit, if I did that, Erwin would've demoted me so hard that I'd be back in the Cadet Corps. He does not like brown-nosers. Plus, it's a waste of time."

"And disgusting," he added.

She furred her brows. "You know people don't actually shove their noses up an ass, right? It's just an expression."

He frowned at her, annoyed. "I know that. I was just...nevermind."

"Just trying to be funny?" She leaned in close, smiling mischievously. "You're not very good at it."

Levi wanted to say something. But her face was too close. She gazed up at him with a knowing, flirty smile. He leaned in and kissed her. A soft, sensual kiss. Raisa slid her hand up around his jaw and kissed him back. They turned to face each other full-on, and Raisa laced her arms around his neck, her hands reaching up into his hair. Levi moved his hands onto her hips then slid them up around her back, pulling her closer against him. He could taste the ale on her tongue. Their kissing turned more passionate. Raisa nibbled on his bottom lip, and Levi pushed her against the guard rail. She lost her balance for a moment and she hit her mug with her elbow. Raisa broke away and caught the mug before it fell out of reach. "Damn," she said, impressed. "Talk about lucky."

Levi peered over the guard rail and noticed two people walking below. Hange and Moblit. He raised an eyebrow then smacked he mug out of Raisa's hand. The mug sailed down and nailed Hange right on the head. Hange cried out, clutching her head as Moblit fussed over her. Raisa frowned at Levi. "What the hell?"

"Couldn't help it." He grabbed her hand. "Come on."

He led her back into the hallway. It was still empty. Levi turned left and headed towards the officers' apartments. Raisa followed willingly. "Uh, where are we going?"

"To your room," he answered.

"What's wrong with yours?" she asked, genuinely confused.

"The captains rooms are single suites." Levi stopped suddenly. He turned to look at her. "Are you okay with this? Do you want to see where this takes us? Or, am I being too forward?"

Raisa blinked, then smiled sweetly. She stepped closer and kissed him. She took the lead, pulling him along. "Let's go."

Luckily, there was no one in sight. They remained undisturbed as they found Raisa's room at the end of the captains' wing. They hurried inside. As soon as Raisa closed the door, Levi pinned her against it. He grabbed her hands and held them up over her head. He kissed more aggressively, hungrily. Raisa pushed her pelvis against his. She slipped her hands free and wrapped her arms around him as she pushed off the door. They continued kissing as they walked blindly across the room. Raisa unbuttoned Levi's shirt and shoved it off of him. Her hands roamed over his bare skin, feeling his abs, his chest, his back. They were close to the bed when Raisa suddenly dropped to her knees. She unbuckled his belt and pulled his pants off, leaving him completely naked. She raised her hands to touch him, to pleasure him, but he stopped her. He helped her to stand. He trailed kisses from her mouth along her jawline to her neck. She moaned softly in his ear as he quickly unbuttoned her shirt. He leaned back as he grabbed the bottom of her camisole.

He froze. His eyes fell upon her tattoos. Raisa said nothing as Levi studied them. "What are they?"

He traced his finger over the strange designs. Strange writing he had never seen before. The foreign words were tattooed under left collarbone. He pushed her shirt off, revealing more on her arms. Bands of strange runes and more writing. He noticed an unusual looking compass on her left forearm. Raisa removed her camisole. One the left side of her abdomen, an entangled serpent eating it's own tail trapped in a circle. Raisa swallowed, nervous.

"My story," she finally answered. "They detail my victories, my achievements, my milestones. Some of them are prayers and ancient spells. Some of them are to honor the old gods of my mother's people."

Levi studied each one. He circled her, finding more on her back. She had a long rune spell going down the length of her spine, from the base of her neck to her tailbone. Levi reached around her and undid her pants. He slowly pushed them down, helping her step out of them. His hands roamed around her body. Raisa enjoyed his touch, leaning her head back to rest on his shoulder. "Do you hate them? My tattoos?"

Levi gently grabbed her chin and turned her head to face him. "No." He slipped his hand down between her legs. "You're beautiful. Every inch of you."

Raisa exhaled in a mixture of relief and pleasure. She fell forward onto the bed and Levi crawled on top of her, still pleasuring her. He touched her experimentally, studying her response until he found her sensitive spot. Raisa gripped the sheets tightly as she pushed her backside against him, feeling his hard desire for her. Moonlight from the window fell on them. Levi noticed she had a few more tattoos on her legs. They intrigued him. He leaned forward and kissed her shoulders as he re-focused on her pleasure. She moaned as she swayed, grinding against him. Levi pressed his forehead against her back, gritting his teeth from his own rising pleasure. He suddenly removed his hand and sat back.

Raisa took the moment to turn over. She climbed onto his lap, and resumed kissing him. She reached down between them and guided him inside. She moaned ever so softly into his ear as she felt the entirety of him inside of her. Levi ran his hands up and down her back, relishing in the softness of her skin. Raisa wrapped her legs around his waist and began rocking her hips. They held onto each other, her violet eyes gazing deep into his dark blue ones. Levi met her rhythm. His hands were on her hips, helping her bounce and rock. They kissed once more, running their fingers through each other's hair.

Levi suddenly leaned forward, pushing her to lay down onto the bed. Without breaking their connection, he readjusted him onto his knees. He hooked her right leg onto his shoulder as he leaned forward, taking control. He thrusted deeper and harder. Raisa arched towards him. She reached up and pushed against the headboard of the bed. Her moans grew louder and louder with each thrust. Levi tightened his hold on her leg, and changed his rhythm. Slowing down to prevent himself from coming, causing Raisa to whimper in protest. "Don't stop," she begged. "Don't stop."

He resumed his powerful pace. Beads of sweat rolled down his face, dripping off his chin and landing on her chest and mixing with her own sweat. Somehow, it turned him on. The moonlight made their bodies glisten, almost sparkle. Suddenly, he came. Levi caught himself on the headboard as he lurched forward. With the final, powerful thrust, Raisa gasped. She held onto him as her own euphoria unleashed; her body shivering from the climax. For a long moment, they remained frozen in place. Their heavy breaths filling the quiet room.

Levi eventually sat back, lowering her leg off of his shoulder. He pulled out of her and fell onto the bed beside her, his limbs and muscles exhausted. Raisa rubbed the back of her thighs, massaging the strain she was beginning to feel. They laid there, breathing heavily and staring up at the ceiling. Levi realized something. "So...you're a pagan?"

Raisa continued to stare up. "Does that bother you?"

Levi rolled onto his side to look at her. He reached over and softly turned her head to make her face him. "Nothing about you bothers me."

"Do you mean that?" she asked. Levi shifted his gaze to her many tattoos. As his answer, he scooted closer and pulled her into another breathless kiss.

Trost District, Wall Rose...

Vanessa sat against the wall in the refugee center. She stared at the bread in her hands. She hadn't eaten since yesterday. She should be hungry, but her stomach was silent. She felt empty, hopeless. The sound of footsteps approaching pulled her attention, but she dared not to look up. "Hey," said the kind voice she had come to hate. "I got us some extra bread."

His voice was crackled, like he wasn't done with puberty. He was only a few years older than her. He squatted down in front of her, but she still didn't raise her head to look at him. She didn't want to. "You haven't eaten that one, yet?" he asked. He sounded disappointed. "You need to eat. Otherwise, you'll just waste away."

He reached over and tucked some of her hair behind her ear. His touched repulsed her, but she didn't flinch. She didn't move a single muscle. "You're so...pretty. I love you hair. It's...what is it called? Auburn? Yeah."

He leaned forward and pressed his nose to her head. Vanessa glared down at the bread in her hands. She hadn't bathed in days. The boy leaned back. "You smell so sweet."

He lowered his hand to her lap, caressing her knee. Vanessa slapped his hand away. The boy blinked in surprise then frowned at her. "Hey! What was that for?"

"Don't touch me," she warned.

"You ungrateful little shit. I saved your life!" He lashed out and wrapped his hand around her neck. Vanessa clawed at his hand, but his grip was firm. "You would've drowned in the river if it weren't for me. I've kept you alive. I've given you food. I deserve something in return. Don't you think so?"

He pulled her to him and forcibly kissed her. Vanessa pressed her lips tightly together. She didn't want his help. She never asked for it. The fury inside of her unlocked something deep and ancient in her body. She reached into his pocket and curled her fingers around a handle. The boy gasped suddenly. He glanced down. Vanessa held a knife in her hand, and the blade was buried deep in his side, between two of his ribs. His hand slid off her neck. "Wha...why do you...?"

Vanessa twisted the blade and the boy yelped. He fell onto his side, blood seeping out of his mouth as he struggled to breathe. Vanessa glanced around, no one had noticed them. The boy opened his mouth to scream, but Vanessa pounced. She pressed her hands against his throat with all her strength. The boy tried to shove her off, but his body failed him. Vanessa stared down at him, unleashing her rage, her hatred. The boy's eyes grew bloodshot. She pressed so hard she heard his spine break. Within moments, he stopped flailing. Then he stopped moving. She continued pressing. Her arms began to shake, and she slowly took her hands off. I killed him. I did it.

She glanced around again. No one had noticed a thing. She calmed herself. Her heart was racing, pounding in her ears. She got up, spat on the boy, and ran off. She didn't where, but she needed to get away. She headed for the entrance, and turned sharply. "Ah!"

Vanessa collided with a blond girl carrying an armful of food. They both fell back onto their rears. "My food!"

The blond girl glanced around at the food lying on the ground. She sighed angrily and started picking it up. Vanessa blinked. She moved to sit on her knees and started helping the girl. "I'm sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going."

"It's fine," the girl said. She glanced at Vanessa, and her frown softened a bit. She recognized the look on Vanessa's face. The face of a murderer. Vanessa handed her the last piece of bread. "Thank you. Well...see ya."

Vanessa watched her walk around her and into the building. She furred her brows. The sound of marching footsteps drew her attention. Three men were walking towards her. Two of them wore the standard military uniform, carrying rifles. The badges on their jackets showed a green unicorn over a silver shield. The third man wore a black trench coat. He was tall, but his face was hidden by a hat. "Hey, there, girl."

As the trench-coat approached, his face became clearer. He had a thin beard around his jawline and small gray eyes. He had a devilish smile and he knelt down in front of Vanessa. "Man...never in a million years did I think I'd find Jess' kid."

Vanessa's eyes widened in terror. The man held out his hand. "Come on. We got a lot to talk about."

End of Chapter 3