Chapter 8: Infiltration as a Masked Devil!
Part 1
"Say it again, Satou-sama!"
"L-Looking Cool is more important than Winning…"
"He totally gets it!"
After the battle I found myself in the bar, celebrating with the Crimson Demons who fought in the battle against the Devil King army.
I was treated with drinks by the Crimson Demons in exchange for me repeating that embarrassing line for their own personal amusement.
Beside me was Megumin, who had been attempting to drink the gifts of alcohol set before me on the table. I stopped her attempts as she was still too young to drink.
She placed an arm around my shoulders and spoke with a joyous glitter in her eyes.
"I'm so proud of you, Kazuma! Not only are you already an accomplished Explosion sommelier, but you have now also captured the essence of what it means to be a Crimson Demon! Fantastic! Truly fantastic! I will drink this beer in honor of your ascension from ordinary mortal to a glorious Crimson Demon!"
I snatched the mug of beer she was about to bring to her lips, and as a result, some of it spilled on her robes. She looked down at the robes, as if contemplating whether or not she was desperate enough to extract the beer from the soaked fabric.
"W-Well, I wouldn't want this beer to go to waste…"
She puckered her lips and made to bring the fabric to her mouth.
I've witnessed someone hitting the lowest of lows.
"Don't worry, Kazuma, I've got this!"
Aqua shot an arm passed me, her extended fingers almost poking out my eyes. A blue light flashed from her hands.
"Ah! The alcohol! It's all gone!"
"Fufu. While it doesn't work on human beings, as seen previously with Darkness, my Evaporation skill has finally made its proper debut!"
Darkness, who was sulkily drinking beer across from us, didn't hesitate to comment.
"...If only it could've made a 'proper debut' when I needed it most, during that incident in the arena. Then again, most of Aqua's powers don't have any real application outside of parlor tricks, anyways."
"Erk!"
Darkness, who was launched at least a hundred feet in the air, retrieved later once I had the Crimson Demons use Dispel Magic on her, was in a hostile mood, not only to me, but to everyone who managed to attract her scorn, which was not all that difficult a feat.
"Snap out of it, Darkness! It's Kazuma's job to sulk in the corner whenever something doesn't go his way, and taking his stress out on other people by throwing out snarky insults at them."
Megumin said this as she inspected her shirt for even a hint of alcoholic moisture.
"I see. So this is how you all see me. I've noticed that you lot don't have any gratitude whatsoever to the great me who is single handedly carrying this party. I see how it is. Well, then, I will relocate to that corner over there where Megumin's very attractive schoolmates have all gathered."
As I walked away, Megumin shouted after me, "Thank you for proving my point!"
I made my way to Megumin's schoolmates, but I was hindered in my confident advance when the village chief pulled me by the arm, and had me sit in his table filled with men around his age. I noticed, seated in this table, as well, was Hyoizaburo-san.
"Kazu-nyaaan~" drawled the drunk chief. "We couldn't have *hic* done it without you!"
I pulled away from his hand, as his grip strength exceeded what you'd expect an older man with a mage profession would possess.
"No, no, I just got caught along with the flow. No need for thanks! Now, if you'll excuse me…"
As I stood, I was yanked by my cape and forcefully returned to my seat.
"Now, now, Kazu-chwwaaaan~, no need to be shyyyyy~*hic*"
He proceeded to run his hand through the small of my back.
He was treating me like some kind of hostess in a cheap club!
"Freeze!"
Using a minimal output, I directed a frosty breeze from my finger to the chief's neck. He went 'eek!' before looking at me, and looking to the others. "Huh? What was I doing?"
"Please forgive the chief, Satou-san," Hyoizoburo-san said. "He sobers as quickly as he gets drunk."
This chief must be a pain to hang out with.
"Oh, Satou-san, you're here. Good, I meant to talk to you."
He shifted into a business mood so easily after having just molested me earlier.
"Excellent work in subverting the enemy's attacks, Satou-san. We have yet to encounter an attack from the Devil King army executed with the tactical complexity we've seen today. We believe that this 'mysterious tactician is responsible for this drastic overhaul in the enemy's military operations…"
"No, sorry, due to that disturbing side of you I witnessed earlier, it's hard to take you seriously."
"Eh? What do you mean? Wait, Satou-san, please don't go!"
In the end, I was made to stay with these old men.
"Satou-san, allow me to introduce you to the village's war council…"
Hyoizoburo-san, the failed magic item craftsman...
Tomigakuyo-san, the village drunkard...
Hikokujo-san, the 45 year old NEET…
For some reason, the 'war council' was occupied by losers.
"Don't look at me like that, Satou-san. Despite how they usually are, these three men are this village's top military strategists."
"Generals prosper when there is war, and shrivel into societal redundancy in times of peace," Tomigakuyo-san, said, as he poured himself a shot of Blue-Goose vodka. "It is time for us 'failures' to once again prosper."
When I thought about it, before I was sent to this world to combat the Devil King, I was nothing but an irrelevant NEET.
"I see that flash of recognition in your eyes," he said, as he poured me a shot of vodka. "You are one of us, Kazuma-dono."
I accepted the shot and downed it.
As I was a lightweight, and I already had several beers earlier, I was now several degrees of drunk, that state when everything and everyone seemed to have twins of themselves swimming around in your vision.
"Now, the war council's first order of business is determining the identity of that mysterious tactician…"
As I had the Farsight skill, I was able to observe the mysterious tactician's features.
Red hair, crimson armor, bat-like wings, horns.
I described these features to the 'War Council'.
"It could be a relative of the Devil King, or something," I said.
Her features resembled the Devil King's appearance, even right down to the crimson colored armor.
"Ah, those physical traits, that must be the Devil King's daughter."
"Yes, from the way you described this individual, it must certainly be the Devil King's daughter. Yes."
Tomigakuyo-san and Hikokujo-san seemed oddly confident about their speculations.
I remembered Buzucoily-san mentioning a magical telescope that could see as far as the Devil King's castle, but was primarily used by lonely men to peep on the room of the Devil King's daughter.
I started to wonder if the Devil King's daughter, with that powerful scryer in her employ, eventually sensed that there were multiple creeps from the Crimson Demon village peeping on her.
Maybe that was what she meant by 'vengeance'.
She wanted payback on these idiots.
And I just so happened to be here, too, the guy who killed her father, which must've been quite the serendipitous discovery for her.
I was one of the two birds to her one stone.
But this bird would fly at the slightest sign of danger!
"I just remembered that my party and I have something to attend to...somewhere else. We will be packing our bags and leaving immediately. Thank you for your hospitality."
"Eh?! What's with the sudden change in attitude? Satou-san?!"
Part 2
My party heard what I announced and followed me out.
"Kazuma, were you serious back there? Why did you decide to leave all of a sudden?!" Darkness said. "Don't tell me that you wish to abandon these people in need?!"
The only real 'need' these idiots had was the 'need' in special needs.
"Meh. I don't feel bad about leaving, in fact, the quicker the better!" Aqua said. "The beer here tastes weird and it's colored red for whatever reason, and whenever I attempted to proselytize to a Crimson Demon, they kept saying that they were already in a karmic bond with evil gods or ancient spirits or eldritch entities, or whatever. I just don't get these guys!"
For once, I could share the same perspective as Aqua.
Though, that Crimson Demon beer was surprisingly good. The spicy flavor was an unexpected, yet palatable touch.
But I could agree with everything else.
"Well, aside from my family, I have no emotional connection to this place, or any place, really. I'm an eternal vagabond, drifting about from all corners of the world, like a crimson wind…"
This place had really amped up Megumin's chuunibyou powers, which was yet another reason to leave.
"Let's find Rain to teleport us out of here," I said. "Where is that girl, anyways?"
By coincidence, I heard Rain's voice from the street across from ours.
But, I wasn't even sure if this girl I was seeing was indeed Rain, at first.
She was walking beside a blushing Buzucoily-san, and she was rather touchy-feely with him.
No, more than that, her clothing…
"Oh, isn't that Satou-sama and everyone else?"
Crap. She saw us.
Holding Buzucoily-san's hand, Rain crossed the street in a hurry to approach us.
"Well?" she asked, gesturing to her ensemble. "What do you think?"
A bad dye job on her hair, as she attempted to dye it black. She also wore red colored contact lenses, which she was clearly unaccustomed to, as ske kept blinking and there was a pool of moisture gathering underneath her eyelids. And her outfit...replacing her Orthodox robes was a black overcoat, and she wore the Crimson Demon stylistic standard of a leather choker and fingerless gloves.
I was thinking, please don't do the introduction, please don't do the introduction…
"I am Rain! Number One Mage in Princess Iris' personal guard! One who has mastered the Intermediate rank in Offensive, Abjuration, Conjuration, and Teleportation magic! I am known as the 'Multi-Master' because of…"
I tuned her out.
She had already been corrupted by this place.
Yet another reason to leave. The insanity was contagious.
I grabbed her by the choker.
"Oi, wake up, Rain! Weren't you supposed to be the most normal person in the group?! What kind of twisted ideas did these Crimson Demons put in your head, for you to be acting this way?! We're getting outta here before your condition gets worse! Teleport us back to the capital!"
I would disappoint the king for pulling out so early, for sure, but I didn't have any more left in me to endure another day in this awful village.
No wonder why the Devil King's daughter was so pissed.
It'd be better if this crazy place ceased existing in this world!
"Eh?! T-Teleport back?! Why would Satou-sama want to leave this amazing place?! Try to convince him, Bufudyne-san!"
This Crimson Demon Weeaboo couldn't even pronounce the native names and yet she was already so emotionally invested in this place.
Buzucoily-san pulled me to the side, to have a private word.
"Kazuma-kun, please listen to a fellow NEET's request. I probably won't get another chance at this, so please let Rain-san stay here for a bit longer. For some reason, she finds my presence not only tolerable, but even pleasurable. Please, don't take this chance away from me. This is the once in a lifetime chance that the gods gift to losers like us. If I don't take it, then I might as well say hello to a lifetime of virginity."
Certainly, it did seem like there was a good mood around Buzucoily and Rain, and there was clear enough interest and some hint of physical attraction, as Rain was oh-so casually holding Buzucoily-san's arms, and pushing her body up onto him…
No, even as an inexperienced virgin, I could tell that there was definitely some attraction there.
Even so, it would be preposterous to sacrifice my own best interests just so Buzucoily-san could eventually, maybe, get lucky.
"No means no. And I'm sure you and Rain can work out a long distance relationship of some sort."
"Long distance?! Are you kidding me?! The only reason she's interested in me in the first place is because I'm the first exciting foreigner she encountered from a culture she had always been interested in! This situational attraction is bound to diminish at any point in time! If I let her go now, she will eventually lose interest in me and she'll meet some hot guy in the capital and the next time I'll see her, she'll already be three months pregnant with another man's child! Gaaaaah!"
This was the self-torture insecure guys go through when women inexplicably enter into their lives.
Deciding that there was nothing more I could do for him, I left Buzucoily-san to wallow in his own neuroticism as I regrouped with my party.
"Listen, Rain, if you want to stay so badly, you can always Teleport back after dealing with us. But for now, please return us to the capital."
And my reasoning was, if the Crimson Demons required our assistance in the face of a dire emergency, they could always send Rain or someone to come and retrieve us.
"...That sounds reasonable. I don't intend to stay here forever...but, at least for a little while…"
She looked to Buzucoily-san, who was ranting to himself where I left him.
We all held hands and gathered in a circle. Rain took a deep breath. She was looking quite nervous, as one would expect after the horrible ordeal we went through the last time we did a Group Teleport.
"Well, then...is everyone ready?"
"Wait," Aqua said. "Just in case we get trapped in stasis again, let me keep my facial expression neutral. I don't want to have a weird look on my face for all of eternity. That would be…"
Ignoring Aqua, Rain said, "Teleport!"
A magic circle formed on the ground below us, but as the mana started to gather, the formation collapsed. "That's strange," Rain said. "I'll try again. Teleport!"
This time, the circle didn't even form.
"Rain-san, are you having trouble, there?"
Eager to impress, Buzucoily-san was quick to offer his services. Rain explained her difficulty with the Teleport spell, and Buzucoily-san agreed to try it out himself.
"Teleport! Eh…?"
His attempt was a failure as well.
"I-I wonder what it could be?" Rain said.
"Maybe that Ethereal Realm or whatever has reached its full capacity. It's travel season, after all."
This helpful commentary was added by none other than Aqua.
"Hold on, I have a suspicion," Megumin said. "Our opponents have shown themselves capable of using the Planar Binding spell. It would not be strange to assume that they also have casters who can use Dimensional Anchor, which belongs in the Advanced Abjuration branch."
Megumin explained that Dimensional Anchor was an AoE spell that could affect one designated area, and anyone within the afflicted area at the time of casting would be restricted from performing or being the recipient of a spell or any such magical effect that involves the traversing of one plane of existence to another, i.e. any spell in the Teleportation branch.
"So you're knowledgeable about schools of magic outside the esoteric spectrum of Explosion magic. Color me impressed," I said.
"I'll color you with your own blood if you keep speaking to me in such a condescending way," Megumin said.
"This is probably the Devil King Army's doing," Darkness said. "Kuh! They are so resourceful! I wonder if they are as creative in their interrogation and torture methods, as they are in the principles of warfare. But, even if they catch me, and torture me for information, rest assured that I will hold steadfast and…!"
As Darkness went off on her usual spiel, Aqua spoke up.
"Oi, Kazuma, let me just remind you, before you forget again, that I can use Sacred Break Spell. I can easily take care of this anchor thingy if you let me!"
"No can do, Aqua. Dimensional Anchor is a magical construct that exists in the Ethereal Realm while simultaneously intervening with the physical realm. Unless we can somehow unroot the construct from the Ethereal Realm, we must either wait for the spell to naturally expire, or find the casters and have them deactivate the spell."
Aqua came up with a seemingly viable idea, but Megumin immediately shot her down.
"I don't get it," Darkness said. "Can't we just leave through the forest?"
The forest where high-levelled monsters like the One-shot Bear and Grey Wolves were only at the mid-tier of the local hierarchy, Darkness suggested that we go through a place like that.
At this point, it would be shameless to ask the Crimson Demons to escort us through the forest, and doing so would be ill advised, in the first place, as the Devil King's daughter would take this opportunity to attack us in a disadvantageous environment.
I heaved a heavy sigh. Going up against someone strategically competent, for once, proved to be a troublesome task, the enormity of which I couldn't have anticipated.
I found it strange how the daughter of that supposed Devil King, who we easily defeated after we found him playing around with the panties the girls left out to dry, could prove to be such a capable person. Here's an example of genealogy's overstatement in the worth of a person.
As we didn't have much of a choice, and all our escape routes were blocked, I announced that we would stay in the village and help the Crimson Demons fight. The only way to get out without going on a suicide rush to the forest was to deal with the Devil King army. And the best way to do so was to team up with the OP Crimson Demons, who weren't good for much else outside of their sheer combative superiority.
"Ah, Satou-sama went out to rent rooms for us earlier, didn't he?" Rain said. "So, what are our arrangements like?"
In Funifura's house, they had two rooms for rent, and each room had a queen sized mattress.
The arrangements I had in mind where Darkness and Megumin rooming with each other, and Aqua and I rooming with...each...other…
"..."
I had completely forgotten about Rain.
I was not used to inputting Rain in my calculations for room accommodations, and things of the like. However, I did not want to offend Rain by telling her that I had forgotten about her altogether, and I certainly didn't want to degrade my reputation, which was tainted with my allegedly 'unforgivable' conduct towards women, to a state lower than it already was.
"Actually, in consideration for you ladies, I have rented a room at a different venue. Megumin, I'm sure you know where Funifura's house is located. That is where you girls will stay."
Rain seemed to be impressed by my gentlemanly conduct. Darkness nodded her approval, and Aqua gave me a pat on the back and said, "You're not so bad after all, Scum-zuma!"
However, there was one perceptive girl I could not deceive.
"...You forgot about Rain-san, didn't you?" Megumin said.
I was caught red handed.
Part 3
"So as you can see, this guy here is an idiot. Please let him have a room for the night," Megumin said.
"Y-Yeah, there's no problem," Yunyun said.
We were at the chief's house. Megumin sent Buzucoily-san to escort the girls to Funifura's house, while she accompanied me to the chief's estate. I had resolved myself to sleep on the streets as I didn't want to embarrass myself any further, but Megumin would have none of it.
And so here we were, begging Yunyun for a place to sleep.
"A-Actually, now that Megumin is here also, perhaps we can have a slumber party, like we used to!"
Yunyun offered this with much more confidence than I was used to seeing from her.
"...What are these lies you're making, Yunyun? When have we ever had a slumber party?"
Yunyun, who had just been so enthusiastic in making that suggestion, deflated at Megumin's scathing words.
I chopped Megumin on the head. "Oi, this is your chance to make up with Yunyun. You two have been having a lover's spa...I mean, some problems with your completely platonic friendship, right? This is your chance to clear the tension."
Yunyun looked to me in gratitude, and then looked to Megumin to see her reaction.
"No matter how you look at it, it's Yunyun's fault that things are awkward between us, right? She suddenly showed up and started blabbering on about 'losing to me as a rival and as a woman', or whatever. And plus she did something creepy like getting the same haircut as me…"
"I wasn't intentionally trying to copy Megumin's hair style, OK?! I just wanted an image change, and the end result just so happened to be this way!"
The two continued to bicker for awhile until Megumin eventually relented to stay. Her reason was that it was already late and she was too lazy to go all the way to Funifura's house.
"So, don't get the wrong idea, Yunyun," she said. "I'm only staying because of a necessity."
"O-Ok, Megumin! Now, you didn't bring any sleepwear, did you? Let's see, you can use some of my older ones, though they might be too big for you…"
She was being all tsundere about it, but Megumin and Yunyun once again rekindled their roman...I mean, friendship.
The chief was already knocked out in his room, said Yunyun, who had to drag her intoxicated father all the way to his room, as she didn't know the Teleport spell yet...well, not like she could use it with Dimensional Anchor in effect.
"Um, Kazuma-san, sorry, but I couldn't find any unoccupied rooms," Yunyun said, after looking around the house. "I figured that the spare guest room would be sufficient, but I had forgotten that my father started using that room to store unused equipment…"
"It's no big deal," Megumin said. "He can just sleep in my parents' room."
"I'm more than willing to join this slumber party, though…"
"...Just go to my parents' room right now, you perv."
Leaving the girls, I headed to the room I was delegated to at the last minute.
The lights were still on inside, which was a relief, as I didn't want to feel guilty over waking them up. I knocked on the door. Yuiyui-san, after a few seconds, opened it.
"Oh! Satou-san! What are you doing here? Did you have trouble finding a place to stay?"
I explained my situation, as vaguely as I could, as I didn't want to embarrass myself needlessly, to Yuiyui-san.
"You're always welcome with us! Come in!"
In the living room, seated around the table, was Hyoizaburo-san fiddling with some an unfinished magic item, and across from him, watching intently, was Komekko.
"Ah, papa. You made a mistake. If you attach that many mana circuits to the elemental enabler, even the most subtle of catalysts will create a violent reaction. And I suggest switching out those one-way directive crystals, they look a bit too big."
"A-Ah. I see. Thanks for the advice as always, Komekko."
I felt sorry for this father who was not only financially reliant on his eldest daughter, but also possessed less talent on his chosen craft compared to his five year old daughter.
More importantly, this little girl was indeed going to be someone great. I was sure of it.
"Ah, Satou-san. You're here. You suddenly left the bar, we were all worried. We were afraid that the chief offended you in some way," Hyoizaburo-san said.
Leaving aside the fact that the chief had molested me while he was drunk, there was also the revelation that these Crimson Demons were to blame for this altercation with the Devil King's daughter.
"Well, in any case, please chat with us for awhile before it's time to sleep."
Not seeing any harm in it, I sat beside Komekko as we watched Hyoizaburo-san work.
I almost didn't sense Yuiyui-san coming up behind me and placing a hand on my shoulder.
"So, Satou-san, coming back to our topic earlier...when do you intend to marry my daughter?"
I immediately regretted ever letting my guard down.
"Yuiyui, are you still on about that?" Hyoizaburo-san said. "Although somewhat instigated by that misunderstanding, I meant what I said about Megumin being a grown-up now. I mean, with all she's done, with all she's accomplished, it would not be appropriate for us to meddle with her life as if she were still a child."
"Oh, I understand all that, dear. But I'm not meddling because of parental reasons...I'm meddling as a woman who only has the best interest of another fellow woman in mind..."
Yuiyui-san smiled knowingly, after having said such cryptic words.
No, they weren't really all that cryptic. It was quite obvious as to what she was referring to.
I was still an inexperienced NEET, though, so unless I had a direct confirmation, I couldn't formulate my own conclusions myself.
I was about to ask Yuiyui-san to elaborate, but at that moment, there was a knock on the door.
"...It's me, Megumin. Yunyun and I started fighting again and I got kicked out of her room. I need to stay the night here."
Lately, it seemed as if probability operated in such a way as to bring about these developments straight out of a rom-com.
Yuiyui-san winked at me before opening the door.
"Oh dear. And what did you and Yunyun-chan fight about, now?"
"Honestly? I don't even know. I was just talking about how I wanted to grow my hair out longer and she completely flipped out on me."
I couldn't tell if those two were close, or not.
"Well, if Megumin intends to stay here, I suppose that our rooming arrangements would need some switching up. Hm, this may prove difficult…"
"...I don't see what's so difficult about it, mother. Komekko and I will sleep in one room, while father and Kazuma sleeps on the other."
"Megumin...my poor Megumin. Perhaps living amongst the city folk have dulled your senses? Can't you tell, as a Crimson Demon, that the narrative is clearly set up as to have you and Satou-san sleep together in the same bed tonight?"
Hyoizoburo-san nearly dropped the item he was working on...no, he did drop it, but Komekko caught it just inches from hitting the ground.
Not that it really mattered. That piece of junk wouldn't sell, anyways.
"Yuiyui?! What are you saying?! This is your daughter you're talking about! Although, my sense for the theatrics as a Crimson Demon do tell me that, in this kind of scenario, due to coincidental but somewhat contrived circumstances, the male and female lead would normally have no choice but to share a bed together..."
"...I can't tell if you're in my side, or what," Megumin said, to Hyoizaburo-san who was conflicted between the two concepts of abiding by his racial traits, as a Crimson Demon, or protecting his daughter, as a father should.
I raised a hand. "I have no problems sleeping with Megumin."
"You don't have any input in this," Megumin told me.
As we were all arguing, Komekko, whose presence I had almost forgotten about, went over to Yuiyui-san. She pulled on the hem of Yuiyui-san's dress.
"I want to sleep with onee-chan," she said.
I remembered that it had already been a year since Megumin left home. Komekko was undoubtedly craving some alone time with her big sister.
"Well, I guess I don't mind rooming with Hyoizaburo-san, then," I said, as I was touched by the sentiments of Komekko.
"... Don't say it as if you're making a compromise. That's the way it should be," Megumin said.
"What a shame," Yuiyui-san said.
Hyoizoburo-san released a relieved sigh.
I thought that this conflict was resolved, but the one who had seemingly resolved it, Komekko, chose not to restore the conflict, but to expand upon it.
"I want to sleep with the new onii-san, too."
"N-No, Komekko, while I'm sure that you're curious about Kazuma, there'll be plenty of chances to play with him tomorrow. But for now, let's sleep together with mother, OK?"
"No, I want to sleep with onee-chan the new onii-san."
"D-Don't be difficult, Komekko!"
Komekko stared blankly into her elder sister's eyes. She looked down at Hyoizaburo-san's magic item, which she had caught earlier, as it fell. She went to work on it, rearranging wires, replacing pieces with the spares laid out on the table.
"W-Wait, this item she's making is…!" Hyoizaburo-san said. "Everyone, get down!"
A beam of energy shot forth from the item, but just as it was about to hit Megumin, it stopped in its trajectory and stabilized.
"...Oh my god…"
This little girl just assembled a freaking Lights*ber.
"I want to sleep with onee-chan and the new onii-san."
None of us could say anything back.
Part 4
As an adolescent boy, I had finally achieved one of my lifetime goals.
I was in a bed with two girls.
Nevermind the fact that one of them, sleeping in the middle of the bed, was a dangerous little girl who had just constructed, and threatened us, with a functioning laser-based weapon that was synonymous to a certain popular sci-fi franchise.
Oh, and the other girl was Megumin. So, it didn't really count.
Komekko was telling a story about a crayfish she caught in a river and how she cooked it as a stew with green onions that she 'borrowed' from a neighbor's backyard. Megumin, to the right of Komekko, was nodding along to Komekko's story, but I doubted that she was actually listening.
Komekko showed no signs of wanting, or needing, to sleep.
By some miracle, however, at least two hours later, Komekko finally ran out of gas. She snored lightly in her sleep.
Megumin looked over at Komekko. She stroked Komekko's unevenly cut bangs. "When was the last time Komekko had a proper haircut, I wonder? And the clothes she wears are my tattered hand me-downs. They have this peculiar smell about them. Young girls shouldn't have weird smells on their clothes! Seriously, what are my parents doing?!"
"We could just relocate your family and have them live with us in Axel. Their quality of life will definitely improve if we do that."
"No, this is home for them. Crimson Demons rarely leave their homes. I guess, Yunyun and I, who chose to adventure, are an exception."
I noticed this earlier, as well. It was a shame, since Crimson Demons were practically built for adventuring and combat, and yet here they were, fooling around in this village.
"That's sort of a waste," I said. "I know that these may sound weird coming from me, but these Crimson Demons are a lazy bunch, aren't they?!"
"I know that you have a bad opinion of Crimson Demons," Megumin said. "However, there's something that could be admired by our stubborn...I mean, diligent stance for individualism. Do what you want to do, whether it be to go out to the world and make something of yourself, or to enjoy the peaceful days in the boundary of this village. Most people don't really get a choice, they think they do, but not really."
For some reason, her speech reminded me of the Axis-cult's 'doctrine'.
"And your choice was to go out to the world," I said.
"Of course! I wanted to go out there and see how far I could go with Explosion magic, testing it against tough enemies, forming a party to make use of my abilities...although, now, I suppose I've already succeeded that goal...I mean, I even beat the Devil King. Actually, it was a bit hard for me to wrap my head around it, that we actually killed the Devil King. I mean, wow, really?"
"I'm glad to see that you're as eloquent as usual," I said.
She stopped stroking Komekko's hair. She shifted her body so that her sides were leaning against the bed and her head was propped in her arms, and she faced me.
I copied her movements and I could see half of her face beyond Komekko's. The perspective effect was sort of surreal, with Megumin's face, parallel to mine, appearing to merge with Komekko's side profile.
"What do you think about it, all this business with us being heroes, about how we defeated the Devil King?"
"I hadn't really thought much about it," I said. "It feels good, I guess, knowing that someone like me actually did something so...well, consequential. I mean, this is the kind of stuff you dream about as a kid."
Especially so when you were a kid who grew up on RPG's and Fantasy novels.
I went on to say, "But sometimes, I admit, it can be a bit overwhelming."
"I see. It seems that you feel the same way."
"It depends. What are you feeling, exactly?"
"Well, I'm feeling that, with all the things we've done, now that I accomplished all the things I've always dreamed of doing, isn't it time to settle down a bit? Take a break from all the action and excitement, and just spend some time enjoying the peace we spent a year of our lives fighting for. I mean, we defeated the Devil King, and all, but now our daily life has been compromised in the process."
I thought about Axel again, for the second time since we visited the home of the Crimson Demons. It had been awhile since I tended to the graveyard of our resident ghost in the mansion. Our ghost-san must've missed the taste of Aqua's hard liquor, too.
"Well, that's good to hear, thank you for your honesty," I said. "But why are you telling me all this? This stuff is usually reserved for your girl talk with Darkness and Aqua, right?"
"...And how would you know about what we usually discuss in our girl talks, Kazuma?"
For the sake of self-preservation, I kept quiet.
The momentum of our conversation was interrupted by my thoughtless intervention. Megumin turned to lie on her back. I did so as well.
I stared at the roof for awhile, trying to lull myself to sleep.
My attempts to do so was disrupted when I felt something warm creep up on my hand, before finally making contact.
With a somewhat awkward stretch, Megumin brought her hand over Komekko's body and held it on top of mine.
She turned her head to me, with eyes gleaming a faint but steady crimson glow.
"I wish that all of us can live together in peace from now on."
I felt my heartbeat speed up.
Although I didn't think of Megumin in any special way, my body was reacting to a physically underdeveloped girl like her.
Well, despite all her eccentricities, Megumin was still what I would describe as a 'beauty'.
What helped, too, was that I already had Megumin 'service' me many times using a certain dream service.
And so, with that justification...
I wrapped my hand around Megumin's.
"...Megumin, while I do appreciate your advances, I don't think we should do this with Komekko here. Unless you're really into that sort of thing…"
"Can you drop your perverted shtick for once?!"
Part 5
The next day, we all convened at Funifura's house, where Sakunori-san served us a delicious breakfast of miso soup, fresh rice, and grilled Purplefin Walloper.
We discussed our individual plans for the day.
"I've always wanted to visit a popular blacksmith who resides here, in the home of the Crimson Demons," Darkness said.
"Megumin promised to sight-see with me," Aqua said.
"And I have plans with Bewlyscully-san," Rain said.
Rain was still clad in the clothing of the Crimson Demons, bad dye job and all.
I hoped that Rain would grow out of this Weeaboo stage already.
"And what do you have planned today, Satou-san?" Funifura asked.
I received word from Hyoizaburo-san that there was a 'War Council Meeting' sometime at noon, to discuss the measures in how must face the Devil King's daughter. Until then, I had time to kill.
"You could just sight-see with us," Aqua said.
I looked at Megumin. For some reason, she was avoiding my gaze.
If she was acting awkward, just because of the somewhat intimate talk we had the previous night, then I couldn't help but feel awkward about it as well.
Well, I was drunk, at the time, after drinking all those beers and the shot of vodka Tomigakuyo-san offered me, but Megumin had no excuse, and she was the one who initiated that heart-to-heart conversation, in the first place.
Furthermore, this little girl had the gall to hold my hand while saying such bittersweet words.
I wish that all of us can live together in peace from now on
She had uttered a line usually reserved for normies.
This must be what 'youth' was like.
When I thought back to it, I started feeling shy, myself.
I couldn't help but recall the feeling of her hand on mine...
Making a big deal out of some casual physical contact, this was the main reason why I was still a virgin.
Darkness, noticing the awkwardness between Megumin and I, started looking at us suspiciously.
"Come to think of it, Megumin never returned last night, even though she said she'd come back after dropping Kazuma off at Yunyun's house."
"I stayed over at Yunyun's," Megumin said.
"Weren't you and Yunyun fighting? Did you two make up?" Aqua said.
This nosy goddess was only perceptive in inconvenient times like this.
"A-Anyway, Funifura wanted to know what my plans were, right?" I said. "I'm planning to have this robe I bought a while back worked on by an Enchanter. And I figured that there was no better place to do so than at the home of the Crimson Demons."
This robe I bought along with the Boots of Speed, just after we defeated the Devil King, when Megumin was bored and invited me out to go shopping for gear, I still had no idea what to enchant them with, but I could at least get some sort of idea by consulting with a professional.
"Ooh! Maybe you can enchant it with an invisibility spell," Aqua said. "That'd be useful!"
"Oi, don't give this pervert any ideas," Darkness said.
"Thanks for the suggestion, but the Lurk skill is more than sufficient for my routine peeping operations..."
"You just said something I can't ignore!"
As we all had differing agendas, we decided to split off our own ways after finishing Sakunori-san's breakfast. Funifura volunteered to lead me to the 'Number One Enchanter of the Crimson Demon Clan!', as she didn't have any particular plans for the day.
"I usually help my dad in the shop, but I have the day off. He crafts mage equipment like staffs and the sort. In fact, I helped build Megumin's staff, which was a thoughtful gesture on my part that I wish she'd be more grateful for."
I asked what her friends, Dodonko and Arue, did for a living.
"Um, Dodonko is also helping out at the family business, but as for Arue...she's trying to become a professional writer, which is an admirable ambition and all, but we don't have any publishers exclusively based in the home of the Crimson Demons, or any sort of printing press. And for some reason, even though I personally think Arue's stories are well written, she keeps getting denied by publishers outside of the village…"
To a fellow Crimson Demon, I understood why Arue failing to get published wouldn't make much sense, as she seemed quite intelligent and talented, but without even having read Arue's stories, I could tell they were all confusing tales about Evil Gods and seals that contain 'world-breaking' power, all sorts of typical chuunibyou fantasies expressed into prose.
No sane publisher would want anything to do with that.
"Oh, we're here, Satou-san."
The store was called 'The Black Dog', and if Funifura hadn't assured me that this was an Enchanter's store, I would have dismissed it as some kind of seedy adult shop.
We entered, and a service bell rang. Inside, it was unnecessarily dark and there were candles covering every available surface. A fire hazard, surely.
"Ah, I have customers, and it seems one of them is quite the celebrity."
Emerging out of the shadows was a diminutive man, a couple of inches shorter than me. He wore a leather overcoat, had a black pirate eyepatch, and fingerless gloves with metallic studs on the knuckles.
"Satou-san, allow me to introduce you to…"
"You can call me by my code name, 013. Or perhaps you've know me by another name...no, I doubt that you've had. Nobody I've told that name to has lived long enough to tell another living soul…"
"I'm pretty sure that name is 'Black Dog', right?" I asked.
"Y-You! How did you…?! Who the hell are you?! Who sent you?!"
I was a guy with two functioning eyes. I saw the sign as I entered the shop and made the easy connection.
This guy needed to calm down.
"W-Well, um, Black Dog-san…"
"Don't call me by that name."
"013-san, Satou-san wants your opinion as the village's best Enchanter," Funifura said.
I showed Black Dog the robe. The fabric was green colored, like my old cape. As it was hooded, and the length of the hem reached only up to the waist, I thought that it looked more like a hoodie than your traditional mage robes.
To emphasize the similarity, there were strings drooping down the collar, too, but tied at the end of each string were blue Manatite crystals, the rechargeable kind Rain taught me about, before.
"I see. As this fabric was made with Mystic Spider web-silk, it can absorb even Advanced level enchantments. And these two Manatite crystals here is what powers the enchantment. As they are rechargeable, you can keep refilling the crystals with mana if the enchantment ever wears out."
He hadn't even taken any tools or asked me for details about the item. As expected of an expert.
He led us to a work table, and laid the robe upon it. He turned to me and asked, "Now, what did you have in mind?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. What do you recommend?"
"...You strike me as the indecisive type. If a girl made a move on you, I bet you wouldn't act upon it, or even realize that you were being hit on."
"Are you sure that your occupation is an Enchanter, and not a Diviner?!"
So was that act of Megumin holding my hand actually meant that she was hitting on me?!
"No, I was just joking. If I touched upon a sensitive topic, then I'll apologize."
Even more so than normal Crimson Demons, this guy was intolerable.
"Anyway, since I am familiar with your fighting style, as I've read about it on last week's issue on Adventurer's Weekly, I can recommend some enchantments that you might be interested in."
Black Dog recommended to me three Enchantments.
One was an offensive type, one which raised the offensive capabilities of spells.
The second was a defensive type, a warding enchantment that would increase the effectiveness of my armor.
The third could be described as a defensive enchantment, but rather than constant protection, it provided an emergency measure against deadly strikes, decreasing the chances of a Critical Hit landing.
Although quite viable, these options were really bland and uninspiring.
"Those are some really boring enchantments!" I said. "I was expecting something really amazing and unique from a Crimson Demon Enchanter, but this was all you could come up with?!"
"Oi! I resent that! And why would you go to a Crimson Demon for enchantments, anyways?! Our specialization is offensive magic, get it?! Arch-Wizards are offensive magic specialists!"
This guy was basically saying that his career and talents were obsolete, based on the market he was situated in.
I'd have been better off if I asked Wiz, a powerful Lich, for the enchantment instead. Then again, Wiz also specialized in offensive magic, with an emphasis in crowd control type spells. And I haven't heard of Liches having any inherent proficiency with Enchantment magic.
"Well, it's not like you have much of a choice, Satou-san," Funifura said. "It's better to have this robe enchanted now, as we will have many skirmishes with the Devil King army from now on."
She made a good point. I could always buy another robe when we come back to Axel. I had to make do with these uninspiring enchantments.
Knowing myself the deadly applications of this world's unbalanced Critical Hit mechanics, as I demolished Prince Jatis's legendary armor with a single tap from my partner, I decided to get the last enchantment, which protected the user from Critical Hit strikes.
It wasn't 100% protection, but it was better than having my body collapse into irrecoverable bits due to a lucky strike from some mob monster.
After my purchase, as I was heading out, Funifura suggested that we continue shopping for anything I might need. In terms of gear, I already had the high-quality Elven light armor set, and the boots of speed. Also, my partner and my shortbow had proven reliable, or at least, serviceable, so far.
I eventually decided to buy some helpful magic items, like teleportation scrolls, Manatite crystals, and health potions.
We bought those items from a General Goods shop, which, in a magic based society like the home of the Crimson Demons, served as your standard magic item store.
I also purchased a leather carry bag that could be worn around the waist to hold these miscellaneous items.
I tried my new equipment on, my hoodie-like mage robes and my carry bag.
In terms of power-ups, I realized that mine was rather tame.
Rather, it was very disappointing.
What kind of mid-season power-up was this?! Normally, the protagonist would get a new power taught to them from a previously defeated enemy, or they'd receive some new equipment from a legendary blacksmith who suddenly appears, right?!
Furthermore, as I walked around with the carry bag around my waist, the bag itself was positioned behind me, dangling over my butt, and as I walked around, I'd constantly receive a spanking from my new bag, the contact making a noticeable noise.
Slap...slap...slap…
Funifura and I avoided eye contact as I kept getting spanked by this leather thing.
Part 6
It was noon, which meant it was time for the 'War Council Meeting'.
We were to meet at the chief's study.
I was the last to arrive, as Hyoizaburo-san, Tomigakuyo-san, and Hikokujo-san had already arrived.
Tomigakuyo-san was already drinking, Hyoizaburo-san was tuning up a magic item, and Hikokujo-san was pretending to read the job listing in the local newspaper.
Once again, I doubted the legitimacy of this supposed War Council.
"Ah, our general has arrived," the chief said.
When was I appointed as the general? Rather, I wouldn't want to be perceived as the leader of this group of losers and burn-outs.
"I have good news for you, Satou-san," the chief said. "The interrogation of our prisoners went smoothly. After all, our...methods are very effective."
Their methods, I was sure, involved a judicious use of the lie-detecting bell.
"We have gathered that the Devil King army has casted a Dimensional Anchor spell on the entirety of village, and even the outskirts, including the forest…"
"Oh, yeah. I know that already. I tried to ditch this village yesterday with the teleport spell, so that's how I found out."
"Y-You were trying to…?! Ha ha. That's a funny joke, Satou-san," the chief said. "Anyways, we've also learned that the Devil King army has made an encampment in the forest. They've also created a sensory barrier around it, so that anyone who was not Devil-kind entering the forest would be detected, and they would be picked off by the sentries."
The chief brought out a file and took out a folded document from it.
"The prisoners have drawn map of the Devil King occupied forest, including the location of the sentry posts, and the encampment itself. There is a route leading from the encampment to the village in which the high-levelled monsters are being repelled by several warding spells lining the path. The Devil King army plan to use this route as a means to directly attack us without having to worry about fighting One-shot Bears and Fire Drakes along the way."
These prisoners were way too cooperative. I was beginning to think that there was way more involved in these interrogation methods than I anticipated.
"It's good that we have a basic knowledge of what we're dealing with here," Tomigakuyo-san said. "But the Devil King's daughter is a smart one. Once we successfully divert her attack when she attacks, she will know that we know where her secret routes are. And I think she'd also assume that we managed to extract this information from her soldiers, already. Who knows, she may have made some adjustments to her layout. *Burp!* Excuse me."
Hikokujo-san, who I didn't think was listening, said, "We need a way to make sure that the information we have is still accurate."
"I think at this point, we can assume that they have already assumed the worst, and changed their layout," said Hyoizaburo-san, who had given up on his magic item, as it was producing a wierd smoke. "I'll tell you what we need, some reconnaissance."
"Oh, what a great idea, Hyoizaburo," the chief said. "But our village is full of magic users. It's not like we conveniently have someone with thief skills among us who can go and survey the forest!"
I had a feeling that they had already discussed this previously. I was being conspired upon by this War Council of losers.
Didn't that mean that I was the biggest loser?!
"Wait, wait, even if I do have Thief skills, you just said that there's a sensory barrier that can sense when someone who is not devil-kind is entering the forest, right? Obviously, there's no way I can…!"
I stopped mid-sentence.
I remembered that I received a strange item from Vanir.
"It seems that you have an idea, Satou-san."
Part 7
"I'm going in, take a peek around, but that's it, OK?"
It was nighttime. With me was the War Council and my party. There were others who wanted to see me off, but we didn't want to make the Devil King army suspicious by having a large amount of people gathering in one place.
"I can't believe that Kazuma is acting heroic for once," Aqua said.
"Yes, it's very commendable," Darkness said.
"I can't help but think that there's some kind of catch, though," Megumin said.
Well, yes. She was completely right.
The incentive of getting this whole thing over and done with made up for the risk involved in this solo-operation.
And as long as I had that I should be relatively safe.
I took out the peculiar mask from my new carry bag. It was just like Vanir's mask, in design, but it was all black.
We ran some tests on it early on, with the village's foremost magic item crafters running some identifying spells on the mask. And they determined that it did indeed have the ability of cloaking the user in a demonic aura, having one seem as if they were of the devil-kind.
I put the mask on, and as I did so, Megumin let out an uncharacteristic 'Kyaaaa~!'.
"I-It's so cool! That mask is so cool! For once, I've begun to see Kazuma as a man!"
"Oi, I'm doing this all for your sake, OK?! So have some appreciation for the brave me!"
I thought for sure that Megumin would fire back, like she usually did, but she smiled gently instead. "You're right. Kazuma is doing this dangerous thing because he wants to live a peaceful life with all of us from now on, right? So, you were listening to me last night. I'm glad."
Recently, this little girl was displaying a 'dere-dere' side.
Even though I didn't remember setting off any flags with Megumin.
Perhaps, the gods decided to reward my vigilance with some well deserved romance in this fantasy world?!
Rather, it was strange that I, the hero who defeated the Devil King, wasn't already swarming with female admirers already!
As I was entertaining these fancies of mine, Darkness looked at Megumin and I with a suspicious gaze.
"Wait...there's this mood between you two again?! And what was Megumin referring to when she said 'last night'? Did something really not happen between you two?! Hey!"
Darkness started to charge towards me. I yelled to Aqua who was closest to Darkness.
"Oi, Aqua, save me and I'll buy you some expensive wine, or something!"
"Hmph! Ever since Kazuma put that mask on, he started to stink like a Devil! I'm not doing any favors for a Devil like you!"
I was saved instead by the village chief, who restrained Darkness with a Hold Person spell.
"Let us not make too much noise," he said. "Now, Satou-san, I believe that it is time for the Masked Devil to strike."
"Uoooh! That's a really cool name! Good job, chief!" Megumin said.
No, that Masked Devil thing was too similar to Vanir's moniker. Rather, wasn't it exactly the same?!
But I didn't care about such things so I let them say whatever they wanted.
I didn't expect her to, but Aqua casted some long lasting buffs on me. Megumin had me do some 'cool poses' for her while I wore that mask she adored so much, for whatever reason. All this while, Darkness was still suspiciously eyeing me and Megumin.
What, was she jealous of me and Megumin?
Had my popular period finally arrived?
R-Really?
I fell into a state of contentment after finally reaching the peak of my youth…
I couldn't help but let a chuckle out.
"He's already laughing like a Devil! If I didn't know that this was Kazuma, I would have rained down a series of God Blows and Sacred Turn Undead on this masked freak!"
I left before the trigger happy Aqua lost her restraint altogether.
I walked to the outskirts of the forest and just before entering, I looked back to the others.
"Just go in already!" Aqua said.
Easy for her to say.
The forest at night had a terrifying atmosphere.
But as I had an audience behind me who would surely make mean comments if I turned back at this point, I forced myself onward.
I used Lurk to hide my presence and Farsight, which had a night vision feature, to navigate through the dark.
I followed along the route which was supposedly safe from monsters. As the route was linear, with no detours, I progressed with haste.
As I had yet to encounter a monster so far, I assumed that the Devil King army still intended to use this route to attack the village.
Or, they could have created another route aside from this one, and left this route as it was to confuse us further.
I took out a map. According to it, I should have encountered an outpost by now. I did spot a watch tower, but no one was manning it.
The Devil King's daughter took precautions, as expected.
As I had no way of determining the locations of the new outposts, I followed the map, hoping to encounter the encampment.
It wasn't located too deep into the forest, but as I was still in unfamiliar grounds, I approached cautiously.
An encampment was harder to relocate than some outposts, and after some walking, I finally caught sight of it.
I saw a circle of tents, dimly lit by small Manatite crystals dangling from wire lines around the encampment, reminding me a little of Christmas lights.
The tents, and the almost whimsical lighting, gave the impression of a traveling circus, rather than a military base.
The Lurk skill silenced my footsteps, but I didn't want to risk it. Crouching, I sneaked past the foliage as I circled around the open clearing where the tents were pitched.
Detect Magic alerted me that there were privacy wards set around the clearing. Upon entering the boundary set by the privacy wards, I began to hear sounds from the encampment.
It was the sound of music and celebratory cheers.
Due to the efficiency in which they executed their attack, I had expected the military base to follow the trend of rigid professionalism, but I found them in this party mood.
I had seen a patrol group earlier, but they had yet to reach the area I infiltrated. Taking the chance, I advanced further.
The music became more distinct, and as I crept past the encirclement of the tents, I saw, positioned in the middle of the encampment, a wooden stage and around it, a crowd of cheering Devils.
As I drew even nearer, I could hear the music clearly.
A feminine voice.
A familiar voice.
"Shoot your heart~! Love to Love, Devil Gun~! Heart to Heart, all your heart belong to me~! Loving and Loving! Devil Gun~! Shot, shot, shot~! Dreaming Fantasy~! Dream to Dream! Yeah! We're Fantastic Dreamers~!"
On the stage, dressed in a frilly black dress, dancing with a microphone in her hands, was the Devil King's daughter.
Was this really the brilliant tactician I had so much trouble with?
This faux-cutesy person wearing such a girly dress?
Although I've never been to one, I could tell, as a Japanese, that this performance before me was an idol concert.
These devils didn't have any sense of tension at all, having a concert in the middle of the war.
The Devils were clapping along with the song and cheering their leader on.
"I love you, Maouko-chan~!"
"Shoot me with your love-love Devil Gun, Maouko-chan~!"
"I'll die for you a hundred times, Maouko-chan~!"
The Devil King's daughter, this 'Maouko-chan', finished her number, and after wiping some sweat from her bow, flashed a devilishly cute smile to the audience.
"Nyaa~! Is everyone enjoying themselves?!"
Cheers arose from the audience.
"I can't hear you~!"
The cheers were thunderous. I had to cover my ears, and they were still ringing afterwards, as the cheers died down.
"Thankies for your support~! We will take a quick intermission, so don't go anywhere~! And if you do, Maouko-nyan will be sad, OK?"
After Maouko and her backup dancers cleared the stage, the crowd started murmuring among themselves, discussing the concert.
At this point, I had already confirmed the location of the camp. Thinking that I've accomplished what I set out to do, I made to make my retreat.
But, as soon as I turned around, I bumped into a body…
More specifically, it was a squishy and plump part of the body…
In front of me was a woman, tall and beautiful. Her physique was just my type.
If she meant me harm, my Detect Enemy skill would have went off.
For now, I decided patiently wait for an opening, rather than to react immediately.
But, as I was formulating plans in my head, the woman started speaking.
"Oh? Who are you? I've never seen you before. And that mask...and you smell like Vanir-san too?! Wait, don't tell me... Vanir-san, did you resurrect into a new body?!"
She had mistaken me for Vanir.
I didn't know whether to consider this development as a fortunate or an unfortunate one.
I was never great at imitating voices. She assumed that I was Vanir in a different body, and with that in mind, I spoke in my regular voice, but with Vanir's distinctive style of speech.
"Yes, it is indeed moi, the great Vanir! Now, forgive me, mademoiselle, but as there were some complications with my resurrection, my memory is not so clear..."
I felt a bit proud of myself for coming up with that lie.
"Hm? I've heard rumors that you were thoroughly defeated by the same party who killed the Devil King. But to think that it'd be to this extent...! Oh, forgive me, your memory is still unclear, right? I am Sylvia, a chimera, a Devil King leader like you. Now, Vanir-san, come. We need to orient you immediately. I will take you directly to our new leader..."
Chapter 8 END
Next Chapter: Let's Begin Life as a Devil King Army Leader!