Chapter 15: Lady's Blessings on this Wonderful Town!
Part 1
"Puwah! Waitress, another one, please!"
"Sen…I mean, Aqua-san, I don't think you should drink so much at this time of the day…"
Darkness sighed. "Don't bother, Chris. Trust me. It's not worth your time."
We were hanging out at the adventurer's guild.
It had been a few weeks since that heist I pulled off with Chris and Aqua.
Since then, nothing noteworthy occurred.
We were now eating lunch, the usual affair of fried frog.
Glancing around, I noticed that Megumin had already finished her meal.
"Hey, Megumin. I'm not really hungry. Care to finish off my frog?"
"Well, since you offered...just don't regret it afterwards."
As if I'd worry over one measly fried frog after the astronomical fortune we attained.
I watched Megumin collect the fried frog from my plate and place it on her own.
Things have been a bit tense with Megumin and me lately ever since she invited me to her room for a 'talk', a rendezvous that never saw a continuation after it was briefly deterred, might I add.
And whenever I brought up the topic of this discontinued 'talk', there was always something in the way of it happening.
Girls' talk.
Girls' night out.
Girls' slumber party.
Girls…girls…girls…
Don't tell me…
…Megumin had become Yuri?!
G-Girls love?!
GL, GL, GL, GL, GL, GL…
"Hm? Is there something wrong with Kazuma? He's sweating?"
Darkness said this as she examined my face.
"N-Nothing…"
I hurriedly drank my beer.
"Excuse me, Satou Kazuma-sama? May I have a moment of your time, please?"
I turned to the person regarding me.
And promptly spit my beer out.
Megumin, who sat across from me, was at the receiving end of my ejection of fluid.
"…"
The fork in her hand was snapped in half?!
Just class change to 'Berserker' already, you brute!
I kept these thoughts to myself, as I turned to the person who caused such a reaction in me.
I could tell that Chris and Aqua had also stiffened at this person's presence.
A rather corpulent individual.
He had about eight folds of fat on his cheeks alone.
Maxim Bregor.
The merchant we had just robbed.
I projected through my face what I hoped was an expression of undisturbed neutrality.
Even though internally, I was going, 'shit, shit, shit, shit, goddamnit!'
"My name is Maxim Bregor. I'm a merchant who normally deals in precious metals. Um, I know that this is very rude, with me intruding during meal time, but I would very much like to have a chance to speak with Satou-sama. I have a proposition that I believe may be of interest to you…"
I was relieved to learn that this fellow was not confronting me about that heist.
It didn't even seem like he suspected a thing.
The correct action to take was to politely decline his request. There was no need to risk having my identity discovered.
But, I still felt some guilt towards this merchant we robbed.
"Well, why don't you have a seat?" I said.
His features lit up. "Thank you! Satou-sama, you will not regret this!"
Under the table, both Aqua and Chris were kicking my shins.
As if they weren't part of the guilty party, too!
As Maxim sat down, he offered a bow to Darkness.
"Dustiness-sama, it is an honor."
Darkness smiled, and said, "I'm curious to see what this proposition is about."
At those words, Maxim proceeded to take out what appeared to be a blueprint.
"First of all, I'd like all of you to please take a look at this."
A sketch of a building.
And from what I could tell from the anecdotes scrawled all over this blueprint…
This was…
"This concept is revolutionary," Maxim said, "An organized collection of different and various products and services concentrated in one place. Imagine the convenience, and the profit…"
Well, it was revolutionary in this world, for sure.
I was surprised that Vanir hadn't already stolen this concept when he peered through my memories.
A supermarket.
"Isn't this just a supermark…hmph?!"
I placed a hand over Aqua's mouth before she said anything unnecessary.
Maxim went on to explain the specifics, but I tuned him out.
I was already familiar with the concept of a 'supermarket'.
They weren't common at all in Japan, where convenience stores were the retail service of choice; more of a Western commodity, these supermarkets, I still had a basic awareness of them.
And yet, Darkness and Megumin, who had no clue about the other world, were looking on at Maxim in awe.
"Um, this seems like a good business idea," I said. "But why show it to me? I doubt that a wealthy and renowned merchant like you needs funding."
"…Ah, hearing such compliments from one such as Satou-sama…but you are mistaken. I do not need funding…"
He drew closer.
"…I need you."
I shivered.
I received flashbacks of those delinquents who called me 'Aniki'.
"BL, BL, BL, BL, BL…"
"!"
Aqua started muttering that again?!
For some reason, Megumin stood up from her seat, dropping the fork filled with frog meat she was about to partake in.
Her eyes started growing dangerously red.
"Oi, pal. Don't tell me that I need to have a 'girls' talk' with you, too?"
She said those words to Maxim.
Again with that 'girls' talk'.
Was that some kind of code word for something?
The other girls, namely, Chris and Darkness, started sweating as they turned their heads away and averted their eyes.
"D-Did she say…'girls' talk'?" Darkness said.
"No…not that again…please, anything but that…!" Chris said.
They started clutching at their necks.
W-What was this girls' talk about, really?!
"I'm…sorry? Um, I don't mean any offense…whatever it was I offended you with, Megumin-sama, I apologize."
As if realizing how unreasonable she was acting, Megumin sat down once more. "Ah, no offense taken…rather, please forget about that outburst."
She returned to her seat and started sipping on her iced neroid with her head lowered.
Megumin had always been weird.
But this abnormal level of weirdness that had manifested recently was a cause for concern.
"Anyways…allow me to clarify. Satou-sama, to be blunt about it, I would like you to allow me to use your name and likeness as a means to promote this new business endeavour of mine. Call it an endorsement, if you will. Of course, I will pay you handsomely in return, and I will even give you partial ownership of my business!"
My name and likeness…
Sort of like how an athlete or a celebrity promotes a product?
Well, in any case, it wasn't like I needed any more money than I already had.
Any other factor that would affect my decision would be…
…It would involve the matter of how I had robbed this same man who was now looking at me with eyes full of hope.
Uwa.
I was feeling really guilty.
Just in case, I used the 'Sense Motive' skill to see if Maxim had any ulterior motivations.
When I sensed none, the decision was all too simple.
No one would say no to money, no matter how much of it you already had.
And, considering the expensive tastes of Aqua, and the uncertainty the future holds for anyone, even heroes such as us, it was unwise to turn down a sound business opportunity.
And also there was the matter of the robbery.
Ah, the guilt was killing me!
I'm sorry!
Even though it was for a good cause, I'm sorry!
I stood from my seat and held out my hand. "You've got a deal. Let's discuss the legalities and all the other stuff some other time in a more formal venue."
Maxim smiled widely and shook my hand. "Yes! You won't regret this, Satou-sama! This marks the birth of our combined venture…the actualization of my vision…Kazu-Mart!"
Kazu-Mart…?
E-Eh?
"Pfffft!"
Megumin, who couldn't contain her laughter, spit out a mouthful of iced neroid on my face.
Part 2
"This is bad…"
While I was lounging around in the living room during one of those lazy nights, Darkness suddenly said this.
She had just returned from her noble duties, and as soon as she sat down on the couch while sighing wearily, she said something ominous like that.
I poured her some wine. She thanked me and eagerly drank it up.
"If that Lalatina who often has fantasies of being ravaged by all kinds of monsters says that something is bad, we should be appropriately worried, shouldn't we?"
Darkness seemed like she was about to make a perverted response…
But…
First she quickly glanced around.
"Is Megumin here?" she asked.
"She's upstairs, in her room," I said.
"Kuh! Yes, please insult me more, Kazuma! In fact, hasn't it been a long time since we've been alone like this?! Actually, recently, Kazuma, I've been a very, very bad girl, certainly I deserve some punishment and…"
"Darkness? What are you doing?"
Darkness froze. She slowly, very mechanically, looked up at the stairway above us.
Peering down, with her eyes shining eerily, was Megumin.
"M-M-M-Megumin…?! Since when were you?!"
"Darkness…how about we have a girl's talk in my room…?"
"No! Please, I beg you, anything…anything but that…!"
S-Something that would even have this masochist genuinely frightened?!
What was this girl's talk about, seriously?!
Megumin gave a huff and then descended down from the stairs.
She was wearing her pajamas and she looked like she had been sleeping by the way her hair was messily sticking out.
She then settled down on the sofa with us.
Or should I say, right between Darkness and I.
"…"
H-How awkward.
I coughed into my hand. "Um, Darkness, it seemed that you were worried about something? 'Ah, this is bad…' is what you said…"
Darkness eagerly leapt at the subject change.
"Y-Yes! Let's talk about that! Or, rather, this is something really important. I should have mentioned this sooner, actually."
Saying such irresponsible things, Darkness turned towards me.
"Quite frankly, the construction of these so called 'supermarkets' inspired by the framework of your 'Kazu-Mart' is destroying the functionality of the local businesses, Kazuma."
"…"
I was suddenly accused with something drastic.
Kazu-Mart itself wasn't really a problem.
Maxim was just a good guy before he was a good businessman, and even though those two aspects don't really mix all that well, he made it work.
Rather than compete with the local businesses, he chose to co-exist with them.
The prices were never sold lower than the local rate, so as not to steal away customers from the local businesses.
However…
There were other merchants who saw the success of Kazu-Mart, and chose to create supermarkets of their own in Axel, which was, thanks to our presence, currently booming with tourists and migrants.
Well, beyond the appeal of fame, people in this world infested with monsters valued and sought security above all.
And real estate in Axel was fairly cheap compared to other places, and yet, it was under the protection of the heroes who defeated the Devil King.
Naturally, people would gather here.
But, the problem with that was, there was a demand, but the supply came from these foreign businesses.
And as regulations of taxes were loose around here, the handiwork of nobles like Alderp who wanted to bend the rules for themselves, it was tough to control these new supermarkets.
"Well, certainly, the over-saturation of businesses set up by outsiders would do something to that effect," I said. "But, it seems that you're placing the blame entirely on me? Shouldn't the Dustiness family, who is next in line of the governing force here in Axel, or even that Alderp fatass, be the one in charge of setting up contingencies for problems like this?"
Hearing my deflections, Darkness crossed her arms and continued to glare at me.
"Before Axel had become such an economic hot-spot, we were actually encouraging such businesses to come to Axel, and our policies were designed to accommodate this. Nonetheless, we would have never, in our wildest dreams, expected such a drastic change."
Well, I also didn't see this coming.
"If bureaucratic means don't work, then why doesn't Lalatina-sama just strong arm these guys into taking their business somewhere else?"
This blunt suggestion was offered by Megumin.
"Enough with the 'Lalatina-sama'! And I can't just do that! I don't know what impression you guys have of aristocrats and nobles, but our duty is to serve the people foremost, and to act in all things in an honest and righteous way…"
Megumin and I looked at each other.
"Puwahahahahahaha!" x 2.
"E-Eh…?! Hey, I wasn't joking…it's true!"
"W-Well, maybe the dainty Lalatina-sama thinks as such, but before the return of the King, didn't Lalatina-sama know that the nobles of this land were basically acting as tyrants?"
I said this while remembering the exploits of that Alderp.
"E-Even though Lalatina-sama is usually like that, she is unexpectedly quite naïve!"
Megumin expressed similar sentiments.
Faced with our mocking of the nobles and their so-called 'righteousness', Darkness's face began to turn red in indignation.
"F-Fine! Although I can't exactly refute everything you said…I will show you how a real noble does things! I will solve this problem fair and square, just you watch!"
Darkness stood up while raising her chin proudly.
Megumin and I glanced at each other once more.
"Puwahahahahahahah!" x 2
"?!"
Tearing up, and with her face completely flushed, Darkness turned around and began running towards the door, outside.
"Hey…where is Lalatina-sama going out so late?"
Megumin said this in between fits of laughter.
"I told you to stop with the 'Lalatina-sama'! And I'm going back to my family's estate! I have work to do!"
Declaring such things, Darkness slammed the door with such force that we felt it ripple through to the living room.
"Do you think that we went too far in teasing her?" Megumin said.
I wiped away a tear that had fallen during my laughter.
"Nah. In any case, it seems that we lit a fire in her."
Megumin giggled, and it was that melodic, girly giggling I heard during that last night in the home of the Crimson Demons.
Remembering that time, my heart started to pound.
I didn't notice it, but the awkward atmosphere that had settled on us this past month or so had, all of a sudden, dispelled at this moment.
In that time, Darkness had come running back to the Dustiness estate.
Aqua was probably passed out in some bar.
And Chris mentioned earlier that she was doing some scouting on the merchants, looking out for any suspicious activity, or the presence of artifacts.
Megumin and I were alone.
"Kazuma…um, I feel that I have to apologize."
Megumin, who had been laughing earlier, was now looking down at her feet, as she fidgeted with her palms.
She suddenly said something like that.
"A-About what?"
Ahhhh…
Damnit.
I was getting embarrassed, too.
What was up with this?
As if that month of time we spent avoiding each other didn't even exist, it felt as if Megumin and I were dragged back into that time in her old bedroom...
"…It's no secret that I've been avoiding you," she said.
She laughed, but there wasn't any humor in it at all.
"W-Well. Of course I noticed that you were uneasy around me, but…I guess that I don't really find it so strange."
I was on auto-pilot as I said this. The thoughts that I tried not to entertain during that past month all came surging forth.
"Oh…Oh, really?" she said. "And…do you have an idea as to why?"
"Well…um, I guess that, for some reason or another, something kind of happened between us at the home of the Crimson Demons, right?" I said. "And because of that…um, things became a bit tense between the both of us…"
Yes, 'something'.
In that time, I started to become more aware of Megumin.
I want to get to know her better.
I want to talk to her more.
These thoughts easily flitted through my mind in that time.
But, as I wasn't sure exactly what to think about this strange development, I was hesitant to label it any more than an undefined 'something'.
"Ahem. Well, yes. I suppose that is what happened. 'Something' definitely happened…"
Megumin continued to speak vaguely.
Then she said,
"Um, in regards to that 'talk', which I kept delaying, my intention was to sort this out. To…try and at least acknowledge the existence of this 'something'. As for why I kept delaying it…I figured that, maybe, as long as we kept living this peaceful daily life, then everything would still turn out well, even if there are unresolved loose ends. I mean, loose ends aren't enough to unravel a knot, you know? At least, not entirely."
I couldn't disagree.
Leaving matters unaddressed was irresponsible, but doing so wouldn't be enough to deal any lasting harm in our relationship.
There were even times, during this past month, when I had almost dismissed those moments we had at the home of the Crimson Demons as something my imagination conjured in the heat of the moment.
As I was musing, I noticed that Megumin had been intently staring at me.
I almost flinched away from the brightness of her red eyes.
She licked her lips, to wet them a little, and then she started speaking again.
"Well, in any case, um…what I wanted to say was that…for now, we should definitely acknowledge that, yes, 'something' did, indeed, occur. As for what this 'something' is, I think that both of us are smart and capable enough to know what it might be, but for the sake of preserving what we already have…I think that we should still wait a bit more until we fully acknowledge what it is…and what it might mean…"
That's right.
Questions of how this happened, or why, or when this thing started to form between Megumin and I…
If we rushed into these things too quickly…well, it would be melodramatic to say that everything would be ruined.
But, at the same time, nothing would be the same.
However, even before, as I was anticipating that 'talk' with Megumin, I had already rationalized that maybe pursuing a relationship that could be defined as 'more than friends' or even more than that, at least, concerning Megumin, didn't seem so bad.
At least, in a logical sense, I didn't have problems with it at all.
When it came time to do something about it, though, really…damnit all!
If only I actually had experience in these things!
Curse my NEET self!
"So…we're establishing that you know and that I know that, um…'something' definitely happened…and is probably still happening…?"
I said that last part as if it were a question.
Megumin blushed even more, if that was possible, at my insinuation.
"Well, exactly, I guess," she said.
It didn't feel like we accomplished anything at all, talking this vaguely.
But…at least this was a step above from directly disregarding it all.
I couldn't help but sigh in relief.
What a weight off my shoulders.
I still didn't really understand everything.
I didn't really know what to think.
But at least I was assured that Megumin and I could at least work through this together.
I began to turn away as I continued to bask in this euphoric feeling.
"But…please don't misunderstand."
Megumin said this as soon as I turned away.
And then she…
"?!"
A warm feeling on top of my hand…
Her hand on top of mine, just like the first night we 'shared a bed'.
But, the contact only lasted for five seconds.
Trust me, I counted.
"…Just be certain, Kazuma, that I don't intend to leave this matter unresolved forever. So…when that time comes, please be ready to explore this 'something' with me...OK…?"
And then she smiled at me.
A dazzling smile.
A beautiful smile.
She then stood up, and slowly made her way upstairs.
It all happened so quickly.
And I didn't expect it at all.
Truth be told, before this talk, I had already, slowly, began to accept that maybe the unmoving state of affairs between Megumin and I would continue on forever.
I was…starting to feel a bit lonely.
Geez.
Damnit.
When did I become like this?
But, at that moment…
I couldn't help but feel…
This feeling…!
"YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"E-Eh? What…?!"
Startled from my screaming, Megumin said this.
"Oh, sorry. I just got a bit excited."
"That's really too much! And why is Kazuma following me to my room?"
I had, indeed, followed Megumin up to her room without her noticing by using 'Lurk'.
My cover was blown only when the excitement was too much for me to handle.
"Hm? I thought that this was your way of inviting me? Now, should I take a bath first? Or do you want to watch me strip?"
"…Go take that bath, then head straight to your room and sleep! If you go right now, I promise to overlook this!"
"…You temptress."
"What?! How dare you say that! Go now before I make you meet Eris-sama again!"
Eris-sama was already rather occupied, though.
Rather than a cold bath, I immediately headed over to my beloved succubus-san.
I wouldn't be able to sleep otherwise.
Part 3
"Four…Five…Six…!"
"Keep it up, Kazuma! You can do it!"
"Oh? Kazuma-kun returned to his weight lifting routine?"
Chris said this as she watched me do bicep curls in the backyard.
"OK. That's ten reps, Kazuma! Now, slowly…ease the weights down…"
Coaching me was Megumin, who started talking to me as naturally as before.
It really didn't feel as if that awkward month had transpired at all.
She handed me a glass of water, which I eagerly drank from.
"Ahhh~~! That hits the spot! Aqua! Healing magic, now!"
"Yeah, yeah," she said.
She dragged her feet as she walked over to me. She placed her hands on my biceps, running her hands along them.
"Ouch! Hey, those are sore, you know?!"
"Oh, shut it! You should just be thankful that I'm using my holy powers for something as trivial as this!"
Muscle building was all about tearing muscles and having the body repair them into much stronger muscles, the body's way of ensuring that they don't break as easily in the future.
As such, bodybuilders usually require plenty of rest to allow their muscles to heal, and it is in that rest and repair time when the muscles actually grow.
But, with Aqua's assistance, I could speed up the progress!
It had been two weeks since I started using this method.
And I called this method with the appropriate name, 'Zenk*i Boost' training.
As a result of this training…
I actually found myself ogling a bit when I saw myself in the mirror.
I wasn't buff or even ripped, exactly.
But I actually had defined rows of abdominal muscles now.
Or, I guess you can call it a six-pack.
"K-Kazuma-kun, if Darkness hears of such an absurd training short-cut, she will be heartbroken. After all, she's spent years honing her body."
I chuckled as I wiped away my sweat with a towel Megumin handed to me.
"To work is to lose, that's what I always say. Perhaps it is due to that hard work that Darkness ended up becoming such a freak."
What was the point of going to a parallel world if you still ended up having to work just as hard as you would in your previous life?
That Tanigawa Kyouske we encountered during the heist was a prime example of someone who eventually snapped from all the work.
That was the excuse I went with~!
After the workout, I took a bath to get rid of my sweat.
And then I made sure to replenish all the lost calories and protein with foods that were high in nutrients and EXP.
I didn't even have to hunt monsters anymore and I was already gaining EXP and increasing my physical stats.
That's right.
This is a miracle method available only to NEETs.
"Ah, Kazuma. We were waiting for you."
Aqua said this with barely concealed impatience in her voice.
As I headed down to the living room, the girls were dressed up in their more formal clothes.
Oho?
"Hm? What's this? Did you all dress up for me?"
I examined the elegant, yet still fairly casual dresses of the girls.
There was that confession (?) from Megumin, but was I bound to trigger even more flags?
"Did Kazuma-kun forget? Darkness issued a meeting for the local business owners of Axel."
Seeing how my eyes roamed on their bodies, Chris covered up her chest as she said that.
Umu.
How precious.
As if there was anything to cover up!
"Oi, I can vaguely sense what Kazuma-kun is thinking?!"
"Regardless, you should hurry up and dress, Kazuma. Darkness also invited us to the meeting."
Megumin said this as she stood up, carrying a black leather purse with her.
"And for whatever reason? I may be the partial owner of Kazu-Mart, but Maxim takes care of the day-to-day, anyways."
"Ah, I forgot. Even though the narcissistic Kazuma has that store named after him and his face is all over the products, and the female employees all have to kiss a picture of Kazuma every time they have to clock in for work, even so, Kazuma refuses to do any work for that store aside from frivolous changes to the employee code, is that right?"
"I-It's not like I can do anything about the name! And that last part is merely a means to cultivate workplace morale! I actually have quite a bit of fans now, you know?!"
Megumin gave a face of 'what can I do'. Then she said,
"Let's put the matter of whether these fans of yours actually exist or not. However…your number one fan is right here, and I'm asking you to go and help your friend Darkness out. Will you…do that for me?"
Hmph.
Thinking that I'd fall for something like that.
This loli was underestimating me!
"Ah, do you think that I should go with a blazer, or just my cardigan?"
Seeing my submission, Megumin gave a smug smirk.
As if to say 'how easy'.
To the side, Aqua and Chris started giggling.
…Let the NEET who had gone on a date with a real 3D girl cast the first stone.
Part 4
"Ah, Kazuma! I am happy that you could make it. It thought for sure that you would ditch the meeting, saying something like 'this doesn't concern me'. I'm sorry for doubting you."
Darkness said this as she smiled in relief.
Behind me, Aqua and Chris were snorting and giggling behind my back.
Damn them!
"Of course we showed up," Megumin said. "We'll always be here for Darkness."
Megumin said this as she smiled gently at Darkness.
We were ushered into a conference room in the Dustiness estate.
Darkness was wearing her 'Lalatina' clothes.
Inside the conference room, the owners of the local businesses were already gathered.
They were looking about nervously, unsure of what to do at a noble's home.
The maids were serving everyone tea and snacks, but no one seemed to dare touch the refreshments, as if they feared breaking some kind of etiquette only nobles were privy to.
It didn't help that Darkness's father, Lord Ignis, had also joined the proceedings.
He was watching over Darkness warmly, seemingly proud of his daughter taking the initiative to better the lives of the people.
No, rather, wasn't it a mistake bringing these people here?!
Look at them!
The old man who ran the liqueur store was sweating buckets.
The wife and husband who ran the bakery, who always fought over the most trivial things, were quietly talking to themselves and referring to each other with '-san'.
Ah!
Oh no!
The lady who sold croquettes and gave Aqua a job that one time attempted to make a show of drinking her tea, but she spilled iiiitttt!
"Ah! Let me help you!" x 2.
The butcher and the shoemaker, who were both publicly courting the croquette lady, rushed in to wipe the spill with their handkerchiefs.
But they just tipped over the whole tea pot instead.
"Oh no! The tea will spill over to the sandwiches!"
The old man who owned the liqueur store lifted the tray of sandwiches before the spilled tea could reach it.
"Ah! Shiiiiitttttt!"
But as he had been sweating profusely, the tray slipped from his fingers.
The sandwiches flew in the air, and its trajectory…
"…"
Lord Ignis soon had sandwich fillings all over his fancy clothes.
"Ah, no…I…"
"No, please don't worry so much. I will just go out and get changed. Rather, I feel terrible if you look at me as if I just killed your children. Please stop already."
Lord Ignis said this as not only the liqueur store owner, but everyone else who wasn't involved in that unfortunate sequence rose and began bowing their apologies to him.
Goddamnit, this is the worse!
How cringe-worthy!
As a NEET who had a dark past, I was sensitive to awkward social atmospheres like this.
This is literally hell for me!
But, just as I was about to hastily excuse myself, Darkness had already walked over to the head of the table.
"Welcome all! Thank you for coming to my humble abode!"
Is this girl retarded?!
I always had my suspicions, but this Dumbass-tina was even dumber than Aqua sometimes?!
Why was she pretending like nothing had happened, even as the maids were frantically attempting to clean the mess?!
And what was up with that 'humble abode' crap?!
"Well, you might all be thinking that this choice of venue was a bit much."
Darkness said this as she gave an apologetic look.
Eh, so this was some kind of intentional tactic?
Somehow, I couldn't help but give my attention to Darkness as she spoke.
With an even, reassuring tone of voice, she said,
"While this may be intimidating at first, I want to get to a point where the citizens of Axel can consider my home as their home too…just as the citizens of Axel have made it so that I would feel that their home…is also my home…"
She regarded each of us, making eye contact with every person in the room.
When her eyes settled on mine, she gave me a wink.
E-Eh?
What was that?
Even though I was so agitated, I couldn't help but feel…almost serene.
She turned to the croquette lady.
"Madame. Your croquettes are delicious. I like how they are not too salty and how you've perfected that crunchy on the outside, fluffy on the inside texture. And also, I am indebted to you for taking care of a party member of mine during a time of financial need."
The croquette lady blushed and lowered her head. "Ah, no…it was no problem at all. I-I'm glad that you like my croquettes…"
She turned to the couple who ran a bakery. "Madame and sir. Please do not take offense at this, but the way you bicker, even though it seems like you have a dysfunctional relationship to others, and there is currently a betting pool going on for when you two will divorce, I sense a closeness in you two, a real genuine connection. I…hope that my future lover and I will have a candid relationship like you two have."
"Ah…no…that is…wait, what betting pool?!"
"See? It's your fault! I told you that the neighbors are gossiping about us!"
"Hah?! I bet it was just that blabbermouth friend of yours spreading all these lies!"
"Why you…!"
Darkness continued on. She had something to say about everyone.
What was this?
Was this that same Darkness?
The one who always said 'kuh!' before going on a long rant about how she wants to be ravaged and defiled?
No, no.
Even if there was a thing called gap-moe…
This gap was more like a chasm!
After regarding everyone, she then smiled, all the while maintaining a confident, seemingly immovable posture.
I was reminded of the time she had resolved herself to become the last wall against the 'Destroyer' attack, standing firmly in front of the town to protect its inhabitants.
All this time, in our party, we had someone like this protecting us.
Then, she began to speak once more.
"Now, I would like to discuss the pwoblems we have….ah…"
"…"
'Pwoblems'.
S-She stuttered.
"Kuh!"
Oh, no.
There it was.
"…Such a blunder…everyone is looking at me…what had once been respect is turning into contempt?! I bet you are all thinking 'ah, what a fake noble! Instead of a noble, you are actually a filthy sow?!'…ah, noooooo~~! Shoemaker-san...the way you are looking at me, I bet you're thinking. 'Ah, this filthy sow doesn't even deserve to lick the boots at my store'. Right?! N-No, do you already know...about the time I went over to your store and licked the shoes at the discount box!"
"No, I...what?! So that's why they were so slimy?!"
Before Darkness could confess to all her deviant crimes, Chris stood and threw a rope at her.
"Bind!"
But, Lord Ignis instinctively reacted, jumping in front and taking the hit for his daughter!
"Ah?! No, I didn't mean to…"
Taking over Chris's blunder, I took out my own rope…
"Bind!"
This time it hit.
"..."
But…
The 'Bind' skill that relied on the 'Luck' stat for its successful execution…
Following the trend of all my 'Luck' based skills, 'Bind' also had a perverted side effect.
"Ah, no...I didn't mean to."
I said this as all the women in the room glared at me.
"Huff...Huff…ah…Kazuma...when it comes to this...you really are the best…"
Somehow the rope had formed into an intricate and incredibly kinky pattern that emphasized all of Darkness's curves.
Showing a face that would be censored in all forms of media, Darkness seemed to spasm before she limply collapsed onto the ground.
"…"
For a few minutes, none of us could say anything.
Part 5
"…A-And that is the end of my presentation. A-Any questions?"
After that disastrous end to her introduction, the rest of the meeting was continued in a strained silence that was filled only by the stuttering discourse of Darkness.
"…Y-Yes, that report was concise. We all understood it well."
The shoemaker said this.
Everyone, while still averting their eyes, could only nod along.
Wishing to bail her old friend out, Chris raised her hand.
"Well, I for one, love this idea very much, Darkness," Chris said.
Of course, she would say that.
After all, she also had knowledge of the other world.
What Darkness presented to us was the concept of a 'mall'.
That was, combining the businesses of Axel in one operation, pooling resources and cutting individual cost while also receiving investments from the Dustiness family.
And, apparently, myself and Maxim, as well.
After all, they planned on using Kazu-Mart as the basis for this operation.
Aqua raised her hand. "Ooooh! You can call it 'Kazu-Mall'!"
She said something unnecessary.
Megumin stroked her chin. She was leaning back on her chair and she had planted her feet on the table.
What impudence.
"Certainly, it could work. But, rather than attempting to compete and crush the competition…wouldn't it be better to just ask the merchants to invest in this company? That way, they wouldn't be competing with the local economy, but rather, assisting in its growth, and they wouldn't have to worry about their own businesses failing. It's much safer to invest in a project like this. It's a win-win for all."
"T-That's right, Megumin!" Darkness said. "As expected of the Crimson Demon clan!"
"Tsk, tsk, tsk. You should always expect this level of genius from someone of my nature. For I am…!"
"OK, thank you Megumin," Darkness said, cutting her off. "Kazuma, can you discuss this with Maxim-san?"
I nodded. I was sure that Maxim would just go with it. It was a good business opportunity even if you cut out how the town would benefit from this.
Everyone else also seemed excited. Some, who were probably struggling to make ends meet recently, started crying tears of relief. They were now also shaking hands with one another, and some even gathered the courage to shake hands with Darkness and Lord Ignis.
Speaking of whom…
"Uuuhuuhuhuu~ Lalatina…I'm so…prouuuuuuuddddd~!"
Well, he was acting like how a father would, I suppose.
…
…
"Leave the construction to me!"
"Uuuooh! Let's go, Aqua! Just like the old days!"
Aqua said this as she led our former construction crew buddies to get to work on the building of 'Kazu-Mall'.
Aqua, ever the genius in the weirdest skills possible, was absurdly adept when it came to construction projects.
And she also had the ability to raise workplace morale with her party tricks.
Really, if she wasn't so mentally deficient, she could be quite the great person.
Beside me, Maxim smiled joyously as he looked over at his creation now gaining more dimensions and how the people of this town cheerfully worked together to construct it.
"…Ah, I chose to go into business exactly because of moments like this," he said.
I looked over at him. He had a satisfied smile on his face.
"I couldn't become an adventurer. My stats were low, yes, but I was still more than willing to try it out! But, I have a particular condition."
He touched the folds of fat on his body.
"My body is like this. For some reason…it builds fat very easily. It is also hard for me to build muscle. Well, I still wanted to be of service to the people, and so I decided that being a merchant is the next best choice! Money…I realize that it can be evil. But it can also bring a lot of good. As…you see here."
Maxim's condition…
I wasn't an expert but could it be some kind of testosterone dysfunction?
Well, whatever it was, Aqua could fix just about anything.
And, hell, with the new 'Zenk*I Boost' training I invented, Maxim could even build his body to the point where he can finally take up adventuring, if he still wanted to.
Well, for now, I didn't want to get his hopes up if for some reason Aqua couldn't pull through.
"By the way…Satou-sama, I found this lying around in my hotel room the day after an…unfortunate incident."
He then threw me something.
"…"
Wine tasting appreciation club.
Senior Member: Aqua.
It was some stupid club card.
"Well, I assumed that there was a good reason, and true to my gut, you are a good man…somewhat twisted, but a good man. I'm glad I listened to my gut! But please, let's just talk it out next time, OK?"
Smiling wryly, Maxim gave a wave before he kept walking away.
I looked at Aqua's club card.
I decided to rip it up to shreds and mix it up in her drink later.
Part 6
Grand Opening.
It really should have taken longer, but after less than a week of effort from Aqua and her crew, and some use of the 'Golem Creation' spell, the installments to Kazu-Mart were completed.
Congratulations! Your Kazu-Mart evolved into a Kazu-Mall!
O-Or something.
"Uwa…Kazuma's face…is everywhere…"
Megumin made this remark as she saw my face displayed on a banner marking the glorious grand opening of Kazu-Mall.
"It's a necessity, OK?! I told you, I have a lot of fans!"
"Muhahahahah! Line up, line up! The 'Aniki' merchandise is now on sale!"
Vanir had taken to renting a space at Kazu-Mall to sell these disturbing things called 'Aniki dolls'.
"Ah…a chibi doll version of Aniki?! Shut up and take my money!"
"P-Perhaps I can do this and that with the Aniki doll?!"
"T-This one comes with a skirt?! The cross-dress version of Aniki is…?! Hnnnnnggg! L-Let's see if we can peek up the…"
Megumin looked at my ever increasing delinquent fan base.
"Oho. I see. You have a lot of fans, indeed."
"…"
Megumin and I took to strolling around Kazu-Mall.
We came in with Chris and Aqua, but we lost them in the crowd.
"I can never lose Kazuma in a crowd because I am very familiar with the shape of your back."
That was what Megumin claimed.
As we let ourselves drift through the flowing traffic, something caught Megumin's eye.
"That looks fun. Look, Kazuma, a bunch of people are trying out that contraption."
That 'contraption' was a photo booth.
Aside from his own little store, Vanir made other contributions to Kazu-Mart.
Namely, the creation of mall like fixtures from the other world.
Things like vending machines and escalators and gatcha machines.
And a photo booth.
"Let's go check it out, Kazuma."
Could she really not read the atmosphere?
The people lining up for the photo booth were all couples.
In fact, just looking at them irritated me.
But…
As I was being led by Megumin, who was gently pulling my arm.
And as we joined the line of couples.
With Megumin still holding onto my arm, clutching at the fabric of my cardigan, even as we already joined the line.
W-What was this?
I couldn't help but feel nervous?
Really? Megumin-san, are you sure?
You're not just playing with my poor innocent virgin heart, are you?
Thinking these pathetic things, I attempted to calm my heart down as the line slowly decreased.
A couple ahead of us happened to turn around and saw us.
The woman saw Megumin and then gave me a wink.
"Ah, what a cute girlfriend you have. You're very lucky, young man."
See?!
This was it, wasn't it?!
What did Megumin expect when we came here?!
I looked towards Megumin, who I was sure would have a violent reaction at the woman's words.
Instead she merely smiled and thanked the woman for her compliment.
Still smiling, she turned to me.
"What is it? Kazuma?"
Ah, of course she noticed something.
I turned my gaze away even as she invaded my personal space, looking up at me.
After a while, she let out a breath.
"Sorry if I'm being kind of wilful. But…it's been awhile, you know? Since we just hung out like this, I mean. Ah, I'm not blaming you. It was my fault for being hesitant in all sorts of things. Let's forget about that awkward time though. Rather…I want to make up for lost time. Is that OK with you?"
"…"
"Kazuma…?"
"Y-Yes. Sounds good."
I only managed to squeak this out.
She giggled in that same girly, melodic voice.
Ahhhh….
What is this?
What is this truly?
Such a sweet feeling…
I didn't even realize, but we were next to go up to the booth.
The couple we talked to earlier came out.
They were giggling and I didn't fail to notice that their clothes were wrinkled and their hair was a mess.
And there was obviously a hickey on the guy's neck.
The woman winked to me again. "Go get her, champ."
The guy patted me on the shoulder. "Go forth. Be a man."
Is this really it?!
This is really that kind of scenario?!
I started to get dizzy.
The world normie only knows.
What a scary place!
Things like doing this and that in karaoke and net-cafes, I thought that was just a myth?!
"Kazuma, what are you shivering like that for? Come on, it's our turn."
Megumin dragged me inside in one motion.
My knees were so wobbly that Megumin's pull made me trip towards the booth.
"Whoa!"
We both fell inside.
"K-Kazuma…"
No, girl, don't look at me with those eyes?!
From outside, I could hear people whooping and cheering for some reason.
"Yeah! Go for it you two!"
"Make sure not to leave any pics behind!"
OOOOOHHHHHH MMYYYYYYY GOOOOOOODDDDD!
Was this really happening to me?!
The virgin me?!
Satou Kazuma?!
Yes, I am Kazuma.
This very same Kazuma?!
"K-Kazuma?! Are you OK?! Your eyes are kind of dilating for some reason?!"
"Ahah, no, I'm fine," I said this as I stood. "Ah, this is Megumin's first time so let me show you how it works…uh! I mean!"
In my excitement, I said something that could be misinterpreted.
My hands shaking, I reached for my coin purse.
I tried to slip in an Eris piece.
But, I missed and it fell on the floor.
"Whoops, maybe another one."
Another miss.
And another one.
Another one.
Another one.
Another one.
"Godamnit!"
I took all the coins I had and threw it on this blasted machine.
Clink!
"Muwahahha! Thank you for using the Wiz Photo Booth, sponsored by the Wiz Magic Item Store!"
Somehow, one of the numerous coins I threw managed to slip through the coin slot.
Just one of the instances where my 'Luck' stat affected my daily life, I supposed.
Vanir's voice continued to echo throughout the booth.
"This booth has the great functionality of taking 'Future Photos'! That's right, this isn't just any photo booth! This can take photos of thy future!"
"T-The future?"
Megumin said this, with some wonder in her voice.
"That's right! The future! If thou are curious, and willing to pay an extra Eris piece, then press the red button! If thou wish instead to take a normal photo, press the blue button!"
"W-Well…Kazuma, how about it?"
Megumin asked me this question as she looked at the buttons presented to us.
The future…
Hmm…
Rather, wasn't this the perfect chance?
With so much uncertainty around us, some kind of guidance would be helpful.
And if things got too awkward, we could just laugh this whole thing off as some lame gimmick Vanir invented so he could feed off the misery of others.
Yes…
In that case…
I took out another Eris piece.
"Kazuma…you're really…?"
Megumin looked up at me with an unreadable expression on her face.
But her eyes were glowing red again.
This time, steadily…I placed the coin in.
And then…
My finger…
Above the red button…!
I pressed it.
"Kazuma, you actually…you actually pressed it?!"
Snapping out of her daze, Megumin grabbed me by the collar and shook me back and forth.
"Oi! You're acting very much like Aqua when she panics! Just pause, Megumin pause, OK? Calm down!"
Hearing my words, she eventually regained her composure.
And then suddenly, Vanir's voice came up again.
"Thy future is determined."
"Meguummiiiin~! W-What do we do?"
"Calm down, Kazuma!"
This time, I was the one to panic.
After even more of this, we both finally managed to muster up the courage to check the photos.
"Let's see, the film is coming out," I said.
After pulling it out, I held the film firmly in my grasp.
I turned to Megumin.
"Um…well, I have it," I said.
Megumin could only nod.
She was avoiding my eyes.
"Are you sure…you want to look?"
I said this, even though at this point, I thought that it would be kind of a waste not to.
No, I resolved myself to look.
Megumin leaned back on the walls of the photo booth.
"Hah…even after we were talking about proceeding slowly...we're doing something like this."
"Well, maybe it just shows us ten years in the future, happily smiling with everyone, or something."
"That would be…really nice, actually."
"And well, even if there's…involving us...you know, in that case, I wouldn't hate it so much."
"…Really, that's the best you can say."
Megumin's shyness soon turned into a hostile expression.
What did she expect me to say, really?
With our relationship being so vague, I didn't exactly have much to work with here!
She sighed. And then, as if mustering up a lot of courage, she snatched the film from me and went straight to looking at it!
"…"
"Um, Megumin?"
"Ah…"
She made that kind of noise.
She gave the film to me, and then she slumped even more into the walls, eventually sliding down.
She held her face in her hands.
What did she see?
My heart beating…
My hands sweating…
I finally looked at the photo.
"…"
"We need to dispose of that devil once and for all."
"…Agreed."
It was a picture of fried frog meat.
As if sensing our distress, Vanir's voice echoed once more.
"That will be thy meal for tomorrow! For a prediction of tomorrow's weather, please insert another Eris piece…"
"Hiyaaahhhh!"
In the end, we had to apologize to the others behind us in line, who wouldn't be able to use the machine after Megumin trashed it into pieces.
Chapter 15 END
Next Chapter: Succubus's Blessing on this Indecisive Virgin!