Civilization (I'll Stay Right Here)
By Kachimoochi
Chapter III
Friends for Life
Anaximander had finished his latest project, building a volcano.
After deciding that his planet of Anaxivia appeared too "innocent", he decided to add a bit of feistiness to it, in the most brutal way possible. Though he could have manufactured artificial humans to suffer the payload of the volcano, Anaximander still had a bit of mercy left in him; we're all the hero of our own story after all. Still, Anaximander had never seen a volcano erupt, so it was a bit of a win-win situation.
Anaximander and Kaisar sat on patio chairs a decent way away from the volcano, counting down the release with slices of cheesecake, a hologram for Kaisar, of course.
"Kaisar, I don't know how you made this cheesecake, but you are truly a gift from god" Anaximander exclaimed with a full stomach.
"Only the best for sir, sir" Kaisar said.
"Ahhh, come now Kaisar, I order you to act extactic, you know not many personal robots, or Geth for that matter get to see a volcano erupt in their lifetime, you might say we are literally making history" Anaximander said, marveling at his latest accomplishment.
"It is easy for you to say sir…you didn't have to manually enter the volcano and check it's ph level to trigger the release…you know if I had hair it would have been singed of…and if I didn't activate my shields I would have ruined my paint job" Kaisar whined.
"I said I was sorry didn't I?, besides I thought you would sent a hover drone to deliver the trigger, I didn't think you'd be stupid enough to enter a volcano youself, what if I'd lost you, you know I'd be lost without you". Anaximander said sincerely.
Kaisar began to play back a recorded conversation that had happened mere hours before their impromptu celebration
"Kaisar, will you please make yourself useful and deliver the trigger into the volcano, I've been sitting here for hours now, let's get this show on the road, just activate your shield and you'll be fine, if you fall in and melt, I'll get you a new body, NOW BURN RUBBER!" the recording yelled.
The Geth gave Anaximander an accusatory glace, Anixamander shyed away feigning embarrassment.
"Ehhh…..sorry about that…but hey, you're still okay, right?" Anaximander tried to defend himself.
"Whatever eases Sir's conscience…Sir" Kaisar softly spoke.
"ERR…me to uninstall your guild protocol, you're using it way too often, preserving my inner humanity isn't worth this kind of torture" Anaximander finally decided.
As if by heavenly command, a messenger bot flew in front of Anaximander, no doubt delivering his latest adventure.
"Right-o, what do we have today"
"Sir, you are receiving an intergalactic message from Nasir Robertson, shall I read it aloud?"
"Proceed"
" BEGIN Hey ol buddy ol pal, looks like Civilization has called upon the services of Robertson and Co. once again. He didn't give me too many details over the comm, meaning that this must be a real important mission. I guess eavesdroppers can exist between galaxies, or perhaps moles. Anyhow, come by Rexavion IV ASAP, the code hasn't changed so you'll get in just fine. See you when I see you. END"
Anaximander stretched on the patio chair and started to prepare himself with weapons, armor, technology, and information using his personalized omni-tool.
"Sir…does this mean we can't watch the volcano?" Kaisar asked
"You know the old saying Kaisar, BROS BEFORE VOLCANOES, we'll watch it later, bring forth the Futura, I still need to gear up" Anaximander said buried in his tool, choosing a loadout.
"Hmph…all that for nothing" Kaisar grumbled as he summoned the car with one arm, and did his best to clean his armor with the other.
All members of Civilization possessed their own armories, if they could imagine the technology, the sky was the limit. Anaximander's friend Nasir for example was into Exosuits, he favoured being able to fire lazers from his hand and fly on command. Anaximander himself perfered weapons of the old age, ancient fighting tools that would only confuse the enemies it was used against. His signature tool of destruction was called an MP-40, a weapon from a dangerous time in human history, though he hoped to clean its legacy through his use.
Since it was an ancient weapon, it fired projectiles called bullets, which had little effect in the 23rd century, so naturally his weapons were modified to fire energy blasts, with little cooldown time. Being the dopey hipster he was labeled by society on Earth, Anaximander still dressed professionally to battle, on this occasion he chose a navy blue double-breasted jacket with matching pants, and a top hat. Did he look dopey? Perhaps. Did he feel powerful? Without question.
The Human and Geth duo boarded the Lincoln and exited the atmosphere of Anaxavia with great haste. The car began to slightly modify itself for space travel simultaneously, adding shields and miniature wings to its sides. Its weapons of course were hidden, for the element of surprise. When they approached the outer space of their galaxy, Kaisar entered in the coordinates of Rexavion, the pin number to enter the galaxy, activated the internal mass effect relay, and manually piloted the Lincoln the entire way. Anaximander preformed an important duty as this happened, he slept, gathering his strength for the adventure to come.
In an hour of so they approached the customized the homeworld of Nasir Robertson, Rexavion. It was an Earth-appearing planet containing only two continents, most members of Civilization modeled at least one of the planets in their galaxy after Earth, for familiarity's sake. They landed at the coordinated offered by the controllers on the smallest of the continents, and in no time landed on the doorstep of Anaximander's best friend.
As the car landed they saw a man waiting down below, around the same height and age as Anaximander, but with a slightly darker complexion. He wore casual clothing covered by a chrome exoskeleton, no doubt the latest model of combat armor. He stood beside a robot of his own, but this was no Geth. It was modeled after a human woman, with blond hair, equal complexion, wearing a pink sundress, EVA Nasir called her.
This wasn't unnatural to the citizens of Civilization. Existing in a society of galaxies where woman was forbidden got lonely, even despite the horrible treatment by the hands of them. All men possessed at least one companion robot by their own design, beside the ones who preferred their own company, or the company of other men. Anaximander was no exception, for he indeed possessed a harem of female robots, for every mood he would say. Nasir however possessed only EVA by his choice, for he had literally dreamed of her years before his liberation.
The two humans hugged one another in greeting, while the robots shook hands formally, and they all exchanged pleasantries. They walked through an environment which modeled a 21st century Earth city, populated by much the same modeled humans which populated Anaxavia, a ghost city would seem unnatural. Before long they arrived at Nasir's mansion, while the Lincoln was parked into his garage.
"I get the feeling that this isn't going to be one of our easier missions" Anaximander commented.
"Life isn't all castles and classic cars Anax, the rest of us have to work you know, speaking of which what the hell happened to Kaisar?" Nasir questioned, commenting on Kaisar's scorched paint
"Well…we were in the middle of my latest creation until you interrupted us"
"Sir made me fly into a volcano" Kaisar said in a deadpan voice.
"What!?" said Nasir, shocked.
"That isn't the whole story, if you must know my latest creation was a volcano, and I needed something to drop a ph formula into it to trigger an eruption, I DIDN'T ask for Kaisar specifically, I'd never do that to him" Anaximander spoke convincingly.
In an instant Kaisar began to play the recording of their previous conversation, to which Anaximander looked away embarrassed, and Nasir rolled his eyes to
"All I'm saying is that you should treat you're A.I. better, if you just use them as slaves, were no better than the women we escaped, take me for example, I treat EVA like a princess" Nasir spoke confidently.
"Forgive me if I'm not romantically interested in my A.I., but I mean they are immortal anyways right?" Anaximander retorted, in a desperate attempt to defend himself.
"And here I thought you cared, after everything I've done for you, and after everything I LET YOU DO TO MY BODY!" Kaisar exclaimed dramatically, his posh accent making it all the more hilarious.
"Alright…if we're done with "Bash Anaximander for all his life decisions and personality flaws" hour, can I be briefed on the mission please? Anaximander pleaded.
"Sure, sure. Step into my office for all to be revealed" Nasir spoke with half lidded eyes and a smirk.
Nasir and EVA walked arm in arm into the mansion, followed by Kaisar and Anaximander, still arguing over Kaisar showing the voice recording.