Pink.

It was pink.

Not just the entrance or the roof garden, the entire shrine was pink.

Hot pink.

With hearts scribbled on it in red. And a message in big, bold letters:

Happy Valentine's Day - Love, Yukari

It was very easy to see in the late twilight.

Reimu stared, feeling a vein bulge in her neck.

Sanae stood by her shoulder, tapping her fingers together. "W-well, uhm... it looks... nice?"

Reimu's shoulders tensed; her blood boiled. She took a very deep breath and said in a low, controlled voice. "Sanae, please go home."

"But, Reimu..."

"I'm about to use very vulgar language, and I don't want your poor virgin ears to hear it."

Sanae held up a finger, looking like she wanted to say something (probably something regarding their now weekly RvB sessions) but shrugged and turned away. "Just call me if you need any help."

"Will do," said Reimu, grinding her teeth down to the gums. "Will do."

5 minutes after Sanae left, she took a deep breath, then screamed to the heavens.

"YUUUUUUUUUKAAAAAAAAAAARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!"

- Some time later -

Reimu was sitting under a tree, leaning against its trunk and watching the sunset.

"I just don't get it," complained the young safe keeper of Gensokyo. "Everyone prancing around with those creepy smiles, way too much pink and red all over the place and you've got people cavorting romantically in the streets like they have no sense of dignity. What is so great about this stupid day?"

Reimu sighed.

"Spending all day with the one you love... simply enjoying each others company...," she sighed again. "Ah well. It's not like my special someone would just fall from the sky, covered in chocolate. That would be ridiculous..."

*BOOM*

Reimu covered her ears and tried to lock her jaw to keep her teeth from chattering. "What the fuck was tha...!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!"

Reimu dived to the side, just in time as a black and white blur crashed through the branches of the tree above her and fell right where she had just been sitting. Once the commotion was over, Reimu opened her eyes and took a cautious look, only to see Marisa, dizzily splayed on the ground and covered in chocolate.

She gawked at the witch, before looking up to the clouds.

"Not exactly what I asked for, but close enough."

Reimu walked up to the downed girl and poked her with her left foot. "Yo, still alive?"

"Urgh, what happened?" groaned Marisa, sitting up and holding her head in pain.

"You tell me, you were the one crashing into my front yard."

Getting back up on shaking legs, Marisa gave herself a look-over, sheepishly trying to straighten her mess of hair.

"I was just going with the flow and tried to make chocolate...," confessed the magician.

Reimu raised her right eye brow. "So basically... that explosion earlier was your kitchen blowing up and you were sent all the way here due to the blast?"

"... Yes?"

She shacked her head in disbelief. "I'm not even surprised anymore. Thank the kamis for your thick skull."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," interrupted Marisa the miko. "You have some spare clothes?"

Reimu sighed and turned around. "Follow me."

Silence.

"... Hey Reimu?"

"Yeah?"

"Why is your house pink?"

"Just shut up."

- A short bath and a change of clothes later -

Considering both of them had nothing better to do for the rest of the day, they decided to watch a PSA dedicated to this 'delightful' holiday.

Red vs. Blue - Valentine's Day PSA

The screen lit up, showing Caboose kneeing next to a river, hiding behind a rock as shots stroked the ground around him.

"Oh, boo ho."

"What's his problem?" wondered Marisa, pulling at the red hakama she's wearing, before Reimu smacked her hands.

The shoots stopped and Grif appeared on top of a ledge.

"Hey, what's wrong with you Caboose?"

"What? Nothing..."

"Nothing my ass," commented Reimu, sipping her tea.

"Come on, we've been shooting at you for like, twenty minutes, and you haven't run away screaming once."

Caboose sighed pitifully.

"It's just not like you," finished Grif, looking down at the blue soldier.

"Considering he's usually killing his own team, I wouldn't complain," stated the shrine maiden.

"Where are the others anyway?" wondered Marisa.

"I'm sad," admitted Caboose.

"Sad?"

"Sad?" they repeated.

"I know. It's just... do you know what today is?"

"Absolutely no clue. What day comes after yesterday?"

"It's Valentine's Day."

"It is?" wondered Grif, just as Simmons run up next to him.

"Looks like we're not the only ones not celebrating," said Marisa to Reimu, who just sighed.

"So we're basically just as pathetic as those guys. Great."

"Hey, what's going on up here?!"

Grif turned to his teammate. "Caboose is in a depression."

"It's called a foxhole, you idiot," chastised Simmons. "Haven't you learned any military terms yet?"

"No, I mean he's depressed."

Caboose moaned again.

"See?"

"Sad? Who gives a fuck, we're trying to kill him! Let him be sad when he's dead," turning to Caboose, he continued. "Hey, you! Stop having feelings!"

"Ladies and gentlemen, here you have a sample of the famous love and charity of the red team," sneered Reimu. "Or rather lack thereof."

"Apparently he's upset because it's Valentine's Day,"

"It's what?" asked Simmons in confusion.

"Oh kami, we're just as bad as Simmons, of all people," groaned Marisa. "That sucks."

"Valentine's Day," Grif repeated, noticing that his fellow soldier is still clueless. "Valentine's Day? The day we celebrate love? And romance?" Still clueless. "You know, girls?"

Simmons jerked up. "Oh, oh- oh yeah, right, yeah, duh, I totally know about that day," he began, obviously sweating under his armour. "I celebrate that day all the time. With all kinds of ladies."

"Your mother doesn't count," smirked Marisa, earning a giggle from Reimu.

"You don't have to try and impress me," deadpanned Grif.

"Oh you just don't know any of them and uh, I didn't talk about it because you know, that wouldn't be cool," tried the maroon trooper to save his face.

"That's just embarrassing to listen to," cringed Marisa.

"Yeah, I'm sure. So why didn't you know what Valentine's Day was?"

"Oh, I just didn't understand what you said."

"Well, what'd you think I said?"

"Valentine's... doy?"

"Dude, just stop. You're not fooling anyone."

"Ah yeah, I can see how that would throw you off."

"Boo hoo hoo," cried Caboose.

"And he's still at it," noted Reimu.

Grif turned back to his supposed enemy. "Oh come on, man."

"I'm all alone now. Church was always my valentine."

"Wait, what?" asked the girls in unison.

"Why don't I believe that?" asked Grif.

"Why don't we believe it either?" added Marisa in agreement.

"It's true. We had a tradition."

- START FLASHBACK -

- Cut to Church in the past, with Caboose approaching from off screen -

"Hey, Church. Happy Valentine-"

"Get the fuck away from me!"

- Cut to Church in the past, with Caboose approaching from off screen -

"Church. Would you be my-"

"Get the fuck away from me!"

- Cut to Church and Washington in the past, with Caboose approaching... you get the idea -

"Hey Church, Agent Washington. Nice weather."

"I guess, okay," Church agreed cautiously.

"I wonder if we'll find all those mean computer people today."

"Whatever, fine."

"You know, because, today would be a great day to find them, since today is-"

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"

- END FLASHBACK -

"Yeah, that's what I thought," grinned Reimu, while Marisa snickered.

- Cut back to Caboose in the depression/foxhole near Grif and Simmons in the present -

"I miss him so much!" finished Caboose.

"Well, you probably shouldn't," stated Grif, unimpressed by Caboose's story.

"He loved me!"

"Like a pimple on his ass," added the blonde witch, smirking.

Simmons joined the conversation. "Yeah, I have no idea why you'd think that."

"If he didn't love me, then why on every Valentine's Day did he give me my very own heart?"

"Wait, was that meant literally?"

"That was your heart!" groaned Grif. "After he pulled it out of your chest! Don't you remember? It would always take Doc hours to sew it back in."

"Fuck, it was," groaned Reimu. "Caboose is even harder to kill than most youkai if he can survive that."

"Man, he used to bitch about that so much," remembered Simmons nostalgically.

"Looks like Eirin is getting some serious competition," said Marisa, somewhat impressed.

"And now it feels like it's been ripped out again, but you know more symbolically this time, instead of like the regular way."

"Would you feel better if we made fun of you and called you names?"

The girls laughed at that.

"Sadly, it probably would," grinned Reimu.

Caboose turned to them again. "Would you mind?" he asked hopefully.

"Not at all, you stupid fucking shithead," said Simmons, sounding a little bit too happy.

Caboose sniffed. "Thanks guys. You're the best."

As the screen turned black, Reimu turned to Maris, deep in thought.

"Hey Marisa."

"Yeah?"

"Happy Valentine's Day."

Marisa smirked. "Happy Valentine's Day, Reimu."

Happy Single Awareness Day!

Character Introduction

Name: Eirin Yagokoro

Race: Lunarian, Goddess (hinted)

Age: over 1.500 years

Occupation: Pharmacist

Eyes: Grey

Hair: White

Special Features: Rumored to be actually a Goddess of Knowledge

Title: Brain of the Moon

Special Abilities: Danmaku, Archery, Can create any type of medicine for any occation

Notes:

Eirin Yagokoro is the founder of the lunar society and the only one capable of creating the immortality granting Hourai Elixir. She followed Kaguya into her exile in Gensokyo, after choosing to stay with and devote herself to the former princess.

A a genius of medicine, she's currently acting as Gensokyo's premier pharmacist, selling medicines at her clinic Eientei.