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Kanan felt trapped while the shuttle floated through space. Kanan knew he soon needed to go check on Ezra and … Kanan gulped as he questioned what he would find, what he would be forced to resort to for survival and the survival of his friends.
Perhaps he should call Hera firs; tell her what happened and of his situation. But Kanan couldn't call the rebels just to send them into the arms of a sith and if he had to … kill Ezra, he did not want them to witness that.
"No," Kanan told himself, it would not come to that. The boy was strong he had shown that, he could reject the pull of the dark side … he hoped...NO the kid would fight it!
That settled it, he would call Hera. Kanan felt like his arms weighed a ton when he took his commlink up and activated it. Kanan had to take several gasping breath before he could muster enough breath to say anything.
"Spectre 1 calling Spectre 2. Come in spectre 2" he managed to say as he held back the urge to hiss in pain.
It was silent for a moment, Kanan feared there was something wrong with the communicator when he heard the other end come to life.
"Spectre 2 come in" he called again this time with more force.
Hope faded from Kanan for just a moment before a female voice answered.
"Spectre 2 to 1! Kanan, Is that you!" came Hera's voice, joy evident as she spoke. Kanan's joy in his heart was just so that it felt like it was swelling with happiness.
"Spectre 1 here. It's great to hear you Spectre 2, but now's not the time to catch up, we're in a imperial transporter heading towards Lothal, but we need help to get away before the Empire shows up." Kanan said all this so fast that he got light-headed from lack of oxygen.
"I see" was all the response he got, it sounded colder than her response earlier.
A twinge of guilt was in him for calling them, when he didn't even know if Ezra had fallen to the dark side, if he was a threat to them. Kanan pushed the feelings to the side, he would check on Ezra soon enough and figure out what to do then. It also took him a moment to regain his breath before he could answer.
"I am sending you coordinates … we really need you to come and pick us up. We need medical help asap." As Kanan said all this, he was having a harder and harder time breathing, but managed to type in the coordinates and send them to the Ghost. But just as he did, his side began burning if pain, resulted in him to cry out in the discomfort as he grabbed his side to relieve it.
"We will be there soon, and Kanan...it's great to hear you." Hera spoke
"Spectre 1 out," he finished.
With the com off, Kanan needed to check on Ezra, so he stood to go see how the child was doing, and hoped the kid hadn't turned as he feared. As he got up however, he collapsed onto the ground in pain. Kanan screamed as the pain spread through his body like fire suddenly. Kanan tried to get up but he did not have the strength to even raise his head.
Kanan realized that adrenaline had been kicked in during the escape and fight with the Inquisitor; which was why Kanan hadn't been in so much pain before; the the adrenaline was suppressing it. Now however, it left him with the after effect of aggravating and intense pain. All of Kanan's muscles ached, his nerves were screaming in protest, as his head began to spin as he tried to remain in reality. Kanan dimly registered that he felt blood running over his torso which indicated that his wounds had started to bleed again. Kanan tried to fight it so he could check on Ezra. Kanan had chosen to call on the rebels, he needed to know that it was safe for them, he needed to see what had happened to Ezra.
SWR
The darkness, it swam around in Ezra's mind as he recalled the power, the hate. It was like a fuzzy dream, and it left a bitter sensation in his brain. All he could recall was the dark emotions that consumed him, it sent an intense shiver all over him. It scared him being so cold, so alone. Yet he also recalled the power it had enriched him with, the very power he had used to make the Inquisitor pay.
"No" Ezra tried to reject.
Yet it seemed like darkness was seeping into his mind, begging to let him use it once again. Promising him power if he only allowed it.
"My parents would not want that" Ezra reminded himself sternly.
But the darkness would not relent and he was not sure he could keep it out. The darkness seemed to linger in him, wanted him to use it. All he had to do was .. to kill the jedi, then the dark side would provide him with power beyond his belief; the Inquisitor would pay and there was no one...
Kanan!" Ezra thought to himself, his concern for the man made him push the darkness away. Ezra had to find Kanan, make sure he was okay. That was when a light shined, it was almost blinding, but it also made Ezra feel warm. The darkness seemed to retrieve all though not fully disappear. It was that comforting warmth that finally broke Ezra from the dark hold surrounding him, and helped him enter the light to consciousness.
Once Ezra woke up in the hold, his head began throbbing, and his wrist ached from still being restrained. Ezra rose to his shaky feet and headed to the cockpit to talk to Kanan, his cuffed hands grabbing his migraine filled head. Ezra's head was lowered so he didn't get a good look at Kanan in the cockpit at first. As the pain slowed down a little he started limping into the cockpit.
"Kanan, How do you know if you've used too much of the…" Ezra began to ask as he lifted his head to find the man on the floor, curled up, and in immense pain. Kanan's eyes were closed, he did not move at all, and some his wounds had reopened and started to bleed again.
"Kanan!" Ezra shouted in worry, almost thinking he was dead. But his eyes were open as he tried to take in steady breaths.
Ezra reached out in the force and found pain radiating from Kanan and there was no reply to his. Rather it was because Kanan was too weak, or if was because the force suppressant Ezra did not know.
"Ezra!" Kanan shouted suddenly as he woke up from his unconscious state.
Ezra noticed that Kanan was shaking and almost seemed afraid of … him. Yet at the same time dangerously determined at something.
"Look at me" Kanan demanded between clenched teeth in a futile attempt to ease his pain, as he raised a shaky hands towards Ezra.
Ezra was confused by the strange command but bend down and looked at Kanan. Ezra would As their eyes met Kanan seemed to relax a little more; in fact relief shined on the man's face as he began to smiled. While Ezra found it odd for the man to smile in their situation, Ezra did feel lighter by the gesture and smiled himself.
They're on their way." Kanan seemed to be warning Ezra.
"Who?" Ezra questioned, wondering who 'They' were.
The more Kanan repeated it, the more confused he became, but right now Kanan talking was for the best. At least it meant Kanan was alive. It seemed like it was the wrong thing to think for in that moment, Kanan finally blacked out from the pain, before he could respond.
Ezra was not happy about this, in fact he was terrified. Kanan and him were floating in space with the Empire probably try to find them and-,.
"The Beacon!" Ezra realized as he began to realize how the Empire could find them.
Ezra went over to the control panel and saw it, the blue lights with the basic writing of 'beacon' underneath.
Ezra's heart raced as he tried to turn it off, but Kanna never told him how to do this part, he didn't know if there was a button!
In his panicked state, Ezra did the only thing an eleven year old could think of; he took Kanan's lightsaber from his belt, leginted it, and stabbed the beacon light through the panel. Sparks flew, but it accomplished the intended goal.
Ezra began to steady his own breathing as that matter was resolved, but Kanan was still hurt, they were still floating in space with no hope of rescue. Kana had said 'they' were coming, who was they? Ezra wondered could 'they' mean emperials? No it must not, Ezra could not do anything to escape it. All Ezra could do was wait for Kanan to wake up and have him think of a plan. That was if Kanan woke up.
SWR
Hera was sitting in the pilot seat, looking out the window that displayed an infinite amount of stars. The ship was attached to Sato's command ship, but none of them had the desire to joining Sato's crew in that moment. It had been a month since they had left Kanan behind, and none of them had really gotten over it; Hera most of all dwelled on the matter constantly.
For the first week and a half they had tried to find Kanan, but with no clues and the danger of attracting the Empire's attention, Ashoka had urged her to stop searching at least actively. Hera had reluctantly agreed. When she had explained it to Zeb and Sabine, she had received the coldest, hardest, most disbelieving glares she ever had gotten from them. The Crew had not voiced against it, but every time she saw them they glared defiantly at her. It was clear that they by no means agreed with the order and she feared a rift between them had been created. She herself also felt like her heart was slowly becoming ice cold because every time she looked at Kanan's empty cabin she felt a sting in it. Even Chopper seemed down over this and had not zapped anyone in an entire month, not even Zeb. Zeb in turn had not complained or shouted at the droid during the month, not even once.
The worst was when she had nightmares about the whole matter, her mind filled with the possibilities of what Kanana was going through. Often she saw him in her dreams begging her to help him, or him laying bloody and beaten on the floor, she would always wake up alone in her cabin crying. Logically she understood his choice, but her emotions refused logic. A part of her wanted to just find Kanan and rescue him and damn the consequences. Never before had Hera cared so little about the rebel fleet. Hera would give up her place in the rebellion, if it meant she could have Kanan back. Yet she knew Kanan would have spoken against that, he had sacrificed himself to secure their freedom, but she still felt miserable about him being in the hands of the empire.
Hera was going over possible missions to occupy the crew time when her commlink came to life. The Twilek wondered if the communication between the crew had come down to this. Calling each other over the commlinks, they hardly uttered words to each other any longer. First nothing was heard then
"Spectre 2 come in" Kanan's weak voice was heard.
She completely froze it was not possible, she shook her head and focused.
"Spectre 2 to 1! Kanan! Is that you!" her joy shined through. Could it be him?
Hera desperately wanted it to be him but then another thought came to her. Kanan called her Spectre not Hera, was it a trap? Could Kanan have broken down and being forced to call her to capture them too? Could Kanan be trying to warn her that it was a trap in some secret code?
"Spectre 1 here. It is great to hear you Spectre 2, but nows not the time for catch up, we're in a imperial transporter heading towards Lothal, but we need help to get away from there before the Empire shows up." Kanan said sounded out of breath. What had those bastards done to him?
"I see" she replied a bit coldly.
'We', Kanan had said 'we', like him and the empire? There was a silence on the line for a short moment. Was he receiving new instructions from the people forcing him to do his? It even sounded like Kanan had a twinge of guilt in his voice, could her fears be valid?
"I am sending you coordinates … we really need you to come and pick us up. We need medical help asap." Kanan said.
There was that 'we' again. Like he was really trying to warn her that he wasn't alone. Another thing that worried her was that he said medical help asap. It filled her with worries of what state he was in if he would ask such a thing.
"We will be there soon, and Kanan...it's great to hear you." Hera spoke
"Spectre 1 out" Kanan replied sounding completely exhausted. With that the communication went silent, only a slight hum was heard, indicating it was still on and she could just hear high pitched breathing.
Then Hera heard a sound she never wanted to hear, Kanan cried, and he was crying out in pain. it was the most horribly thing she had ever heard. Hera never wanted to hear that sound ever again, and for a moment she froze unsure what to do, her instinct and heart screaming to help him. Hera saw the location coordinates that had been sent to the Ghost, wondering what she should do with it when she heard something else; the sound of a lightsaber penetrating metal. The signal was now gone completely, Hera tried to contact the signal to no avail, she had to keep herself from calling out.
What could have made Kanan scream so badly, so loudly? What had those bastards done to him? Would all her nightmares turn out to be true? Was Kanan trying to fight his capturers off? Should they go? It could be trap where they all ended up being captured in a futile attempt to save him. Hera couldn't risk the crew's safety, but neither could she just leave him to his fate, to his death, judging by that scream. Hera couldn't lose him, she wouldn't, Hera's mind was made up, they would not leave him a second time. She opened the commlink again, for a short moment she wanted to try and contact Kanan again, to hear his voice again, but she forced herself to focus on contacting the other's.
"Zeb can you go get Ashoka to come join Sabine and me in the common room? I need all three of you" did she call at both Zeb and Sabine.
"Will do Hera" came Zeb's reluctant voice over the commlink. Sabine did not even answer.
Hera raised from the seat and walked to the common room. How was she going to present this? Since the mission, life on the Ghost had gotten quite depressing. As the Mandalorian entered the room, Hera decided to just roll with it.
"You called us Captain Syndulla." Sabine asked rather coldly as she sat at the table, refusing to even look Hera in the eyes.
Hera could feel Sabine's anger filling the room while the girl silently looked to the floor. Since Hera had given the order to stop their search for Kanan, Sabine in particular had demonstrated her dislike of the situation by referring to her by her title and last name. Hera normally never pulled her rank on them but she did in this case, which had only broken her heart even more to do so. But Sabine kept arguing with her, coming up with impossible way's to find their leader. Hera in her distraught state had yelled at someone she considered her daughter.
"WE'RE DONE SABINE,HE'S GONE, SO DROP IT, THAT'S AN ORDER!"
Hera had known it was a mistake the second the words had left her mouth, the look of hurt and pain in Sabine's eyes had almost made her cry. Before she could explain or apologize Sabine had stormed out and Hera could see how angry and hurt she was. Sabine had been so shocked, not only at the order but for Hera yelling at her, that she had refused to call her Hera ever since. Every time Hera had tried to approach Sabine about it she had asked if the Captain wished anything else and then walk off as soon as she was excused. The one time Hera had managed to meet Sabine's eyes they were like daggers aimed at her with intense anger burning behind the retina's, it was evident she had been close to pour all her anger out on her. Sabine was like a daughter to her, and for Sabine to be so angry with her twisted her heart. Especially in a time where the man she loved was missing. The matter was almost bringing her to tears, she had to try to fix this crazy mess. This wasn't just about saving Kanan, but about saving her family now too.
Hera sighed in dismay at Sabine's continued stubbornness, "Sabine please just call me Hera" she said as gently as she could.
"A superior is not called by their first name Captain Syndulla. I learned that at the Academy." Sabine replied right back. The anger and pain in her voice was clear.
"Sabine this is not the Academy," Hera pleaded.
"Oh really? Is that why Captain Hera Syndulla ordered us to stop searching for Kanan. Leaving him behind, just like the Empire does to their men. What makes you different from them, Huh!?" Sabine spatted, her held in rage finally coming to surface after weeks of suppressing it.
"We left him with the Grand Inquisitor and now he has Kanan, I know what the empire does to people who don't agree with them. Do you know what they're probably doing to him? Torture, Hera, they are torturing him, or he could be dead from torture!" We left him to that!" Sabine said in anger and full of pain.
"Sabine we had to. It was …." Hera began.
"FOR THE GOOD OF THE REBELLION I KNOW, THEY SAID THAT AT THE ACADEMY AS WELL CAPTAIN SYNDULLA" Sabine scremad. Tears ran down her cheeks, "YOU ALWAYS THINK ON THE REBELLION! WHAT IF YOU THOUGHT ABOUT YOUR FAMILY FOR ONCE?! I THOUGHT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE BETTER THAN THAT" Sabine screamed and stormed out and nearly collided with Ashoka and Zeb as they entered the room.
"Sabine" she called after her but the girl either didn't hear her or would not listen.
Hera's heart hurt even more than before as she sighed before she turned to Ahsoka and Zeb. Hera looked to Zeb, but knew he would not explode on her like Sabine, in fact he was almost opposite, he had almost stopped talking to her at all. It was always just yes, no or I will do that, he would not make a conversation with her any longer. Hera knew that he was not angry at her like Sabine but he was not happy with her either, he just reduced her to a person he answered when asked from her which was almost even worse.
"Thank you for coming Ahsoka" Hera greeted, trying not show how much the argument had hurt.
"Of course, but what is it about Hera?" Ahsoka asked in anticipation.
Hera took a deep breath before telling them with a smile on her face, "I was contacted by Kanan or at least I think it is him. Coordinates were sent to the Ghost so we can pick him up." she began.
"Karabast he contacted you? Wait until I tell Sabine" Zeb exclaimed in joy and smiled for the first time in a month and ran out.
Ahsoka smiled as well but as soon as Zeb was out, she recalled what Hera had said.
"'Think it was him'?" Ashoka questioned.
"It was his voice but he kept calling me spectre and saying we, he … he cried out in pain. I fear he is forced to contact us in another effort to capture us. But I think we should go for it."
Ahsoka looked troubled by Hera's idea, "Hera, if it is a trap then you risk not only the crew's safety, but also the Squadron as well. There was a reason I asked you to abandon the search."
Hera was not letting this drop. "That was when we had no leads. Now we have one, Kanan contacting us, contacting me!
If he did make it out, then he could be in trouble, needing our help. This crew can't go alone. I heard the sound of a lightsaber cutting through metal. I tried to call back but the link was completely dead. Kanan could be fighting Imperials right now! We can't leave him to that, he would come for us, for you. We need your help if the Inquisitor is really there, fighting him. Please Ahsoka " Hera was pleading for Ahsoka to come on this mission; but rather she came or not, the crew was going and that was final for Hera.
Ahsoka was silent for a little while.
"The more you describe it all, the more it sounds like a trap Hera" Ahsoka protested.
"Ashoka we will be cut to shreds if it is the Inquisitor, we are not force users but we are going no matter what. I can't leave him to the fate, his cry when the conversation was over, was horrifying" Hera said steadfast and winced.
"Kanan crying out in pain could of been forced by his captors, in order to cause us panic and react irrationally," Ahsoka pointed out.
"I am willing to take that risk. Kanan deserves at least an attempt to get him back" Hera answered a little frustrated.
The rational part of her mind knew this but she did not care, why could Ahsoka not understand this?
Ahsoka looked at her before a small smile on her face.
"Hera, when I gave the order to stop the search, I wanted you and your crew to stay away in an effort to protect you. However, I see now how it hurts you to be separated from him. You need Kanan, he's a part of your team, part of your family, but please be prepared for the worst. In case this does not go well, I need you to know all the possibilities. If he screamed we might find him in the hands of the Inquisitor torturing him, worse the Inquisitor might kill him right in front of us just to prevent us to get to him or cause us harm" Ahsoka warned.
Hera nodded and shivered at the mention of those possibilities but even then she could not help but smile, she so hoped it was him.
Ahsoka was about to leave when she called her back.
"Ahsoka we need medical supplies and to have a full medical team standing ready. If it isn't a trap … Kanan asked for full medical support asap" she said feeling her heart drop by that.
Ahsoka nodded and began to leave before she stopped at the door and gave Hera some advice.
"Sabine feels the exact same way about this crew as you do. Be honest about those feelings, don't try to hide them from those you care about"
As Ahsoka finally left to get the medical teams ready, Hera was left alone as she sank into her seat. She had to steady her heart for what was to come. Hera knew all possibilities of how they could find Kanan, but at least then they would know what happened to their leader. Hera would know what had happened to the man she loved, she only hoped that none of her nightmares turned out to be true. Soon she started walking back to the cockpit to set the coordinates into the Ghost prepare it for flight.
"Is it true?" she heard Sabine's ask in a barely audible voice, and looked at the young woman.
Sabine was standing in the door and for the first time in a month, Hera saw hope and happiness in the young woman.
"It is Sabine, but I need both you and Zeb to gear up for battle. I could very well be a trap set by the Empire. Ahsoka will accompany us for the same reason, as back up."
Sabine's face became hard as she mentioned the possibility, and Hera could tell Sabine was thinking of the same thing that also plagued her mind too, of what they could find. Sabine was about to leave when she called her back.
"Sabine you and Zeb need to be prepared for that fact it could be the Inquisitor forcing Kanan to do this to capture all of us. Even if it is Kanan, and he did escape, he might be..." she gulped before she continued "in really bad shape. Kanan asked for medical supplies, he … he screamed out in pain" she managed to get out.
Sabine face grew even darker and Hera started to fear that she had made a mistake to tell her the last part.
"I know what the empire is capable of thank you for the warning" Sabine answered coldly.
"Sabine please I know you know what the Empire is capable of. I'm just is trying to be realistic. I know you miss Kanan, but I don't to get your hopes up to just have it hurt you even more than this whole mess already has," Hera took a deep breath before she continue "partly because of me."
"I thought you got me," Sabine blurted out, "I know this might sound crazy but you were the first person I trusted when I joined this crew; You and I seemed to be on the same page about everything. The this happened, and I thought you would be the last person to give up on Kanan. I thought you cared about him, about us."
Hera was angered Sabine thought she didn't cared, but maintained her cool.
"Sabine, Kanan, this crew, means everything to me!" Hera exclaimed, as tears welled up in her eyes, "When we ran out of leads, I thought of every possibility that you did, and my heart shattered when I was asked to call of the search. But I knew Kanan wouldn't want us captured, or his sacrifice would have been for nothing."
Sabine eyes widened in sadness as Hera made sense to her. In truth, Hera had tried to tell her this, but now was the first time Sabine was actually listening.
"But now we have a lead, and good or bad, at the end of this, we'll know. Okay?" Hera's voice cracked as she tried to maintain her composure.
Hera noticed Sabine eyes clenched, as well as her fist, but it wasn't in anger at Hera.
"I'm sorry," the Mandalorian apologized, "I just miss him. I already lost one family, I can't lose this one." Sabine couldn't hold it in, as her tears streamed down her face.
Hera placed a firm grip on the Mandalorian's shoulders for support.
"I know Sabine, and I'm sorry too. I hurt you, I hurt you by giving you an order to leave Kanan to his fate. I hated myself for leaving Kanan to that; but as a leader you sometimes have to see the bigger picture and think about the safety of the crew and the squadron. We risked to attract the attention of the Empire if we had kept looking. It broke my own heart to do just that and even more to ordered you to do so. I treated you like a soldier, not like a teammate, or like a family member. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that, but I was so upset by it all, and you refused to listen to me. Sabine, I cannot promise that something like this won't happen again; but I can promise to talk to you about a decision, and not order it." Hera rationalized and looked at Sabine.
Sabine was quiet for a little while, before wiping her tears away, "Thank you, and I promise to listen to you. You had a good reason, but I dismissed it as not caring. I should have known that wasn't true."
Hera smiled at Sabine's words, "I will always care, not matter what."
Sabine then surprised Hera, and flung herself at Hera for a hug. Hera smiled in both relief and joy as she hugged Sabine back. Both girl's let their last bit of tears fall before they regained their composure.
"No matter what happens Hera?" Sabine asked in regards to Hera's words being true despite what they would find.
Hera smiled, "No matter what happens," She assured Sabine.
Both girls smiled.
"Now, I need you to gear up. I have asked Ashoka for medical supplies so while I pilot you and Zeb should help her set them up so it is ready for use" Hera said.
Hera hesitated before she added.
"Sabine … Kanan might be in really bad shape, he screamed in pain and sounded breathless. I heard sounds of a lightsaber like someone was fighting. I need you be prepared for the worst it could be … it could be that we found the Inquisitor torturing him and will kill him right in front of us" the admission costed her much. Sabine's face became dark for a moment.
Sabine nodded and left for Hera to go to the cockpit. Despite not knowing what they would find, Hera felt lighter than she had in days. Now that Sabine and her were honest about what was bugging them, Hera's dark cloud of despair had faded as she got Sabine back to her side, back to trusting her. Now Hera was ready to find Kanan, she just prayed it was in a state she could handle.
A/N What do you think will happen when Ezra meets the crew? A big thanks to all the readers and a special thank to Lynn Friedman-Kinsey for your super nice comment both Charm and I enjoyed it.