This was going to be the most awkward dinner ever.

Yaz had tried to dissuade the meal from happening, given that there was a manhunt out for 'Samantha' still. Surely it couldn't be safe for Martha to even leave the TARDIS. Mickey had almost laughed.

'I've already wiped their cameras. They have no photographic evidence of her. You'll be fine.'

'But… how?'

'Wiping film, it's kinda my thing,' Mickey smirked, cheekily.

It was good that the police wouldn't be able to trace Martha, but it did make her wonder how Martha and Mickey were so good at hiding their tracks. It scared her a bit, in all honesty.

So here she sat, awkwardly, at the local Italian near her home. When she'd pictured pizza, she thought longingly of Domino's, but Martha had insisted on a more upmarket place. Yaz couldn't really say no.

Yaz still felt a bit queasy, but she knew lining her stomach would be a good idea. And she did love pizza.

They spent some time in silence, as they surveyed their respective menus. Man, Yaz could use a drink right now. But given that she'd been drugged only a few hours prior, it perhaps wasn't the best thing to do right now. Once their orders had been taken, there was no hiding. Time to talk.

Yaz took an awkward sip of her water, trying to think of something to say. She knew that in order to find The Doctor, Martha was her best shot, and she should do everything she could to get on with her. But, she couldn't stop the pang of betrayal eating at her.

Martha clearly felt as awkward as she did, as she almost mirrored Yaz in taking a sip. Martha set her glass down, took in a deep breath, and bit the bullet.

'Clearly, we need to address what happened today. Get it out in the open.'

Well, that's one way to break the ice. Yaz had to admire Martha's direct approach.

'Given that you drugged me today, yeah, I guess we should.'

'I will apologise a thousand times if that's what it takes, but Yaz, I've explained to you why I had to do it.'

'That's not really an apology, Martha.'

Martha sighed, resigned but accepting.

'You're right, I'm sorry.' She paused, and apologised again. 'I'm really sorry I drugged you today. It really was a last minute resort. I wouldn't have done it otherwise.'

'You know, you had me doubting you today. I felt so…' Yaz knew the word she wanted to say, but it felt way too big to say. After all, she barely knew this woman.

'Betrayed?' Martha answered for her. Yaz was surprised by her perceptiveness.

'Yeah, I guess. Look, I know we don't know each other, but we've both travelled with The Doctor. That's not something most people can say, and it was cool to meet someone who knows her properly.'

'It is cool. Yaz, you're a great person. And Ryan and Graham too. It's good to see that The Doctor still picks good people to travel with.' Try as she might, Yaz couldn't help but feel flattered.

'You think I'm a great person?'

'Of course! You're so resourceful. The way you jumped straight into action to try and find our friend. The way you immediately put The Doctor before your career, it shows you're incredibly loyal. The Doctor couldn't have picked a better companion, if you ask me.'

Okay, now Yaz couldn't stop blushing. She was meant to be mad at Martha, but the more the older woman spoke, the less angry Yaz became.

'You're just saying that,' she mumbled, casting her eyes down shyly.

'Yaz, I'm really not. I've only known you, what, a day? And I can already see why The Doctor picked you to travel with her.' She paused for effect. 'It is really good to meet you, Yaz. If you can forgive me, I think we could be good friends.'

This surprised Yaz. Martha was so cool, so effortless, so interesting, and here she was, saying she wanted to be friends with Yaz. Yaz, who didn't have many friends in the world. It was an offer too tempting to pass up.

'I'd like to be friends.' Yaz offered up, quietly. She still hadn't fully forgiven Martha, but she was certainly on her way to. Martha grinned.

'I'd like that too.' Martha looked like she could finally relax. Her shoulders released the tension in them that Yaz hadn't even noticed until then. 'It's great to see that she's not travelling alone. The Doctor isn't great when she's lonely.'

'What do you mean?' Yaz asked. She'd never thought about The Doctor travelling alone. Since she'd known them, she'd barely left her companions alone. Yaz loved it.

'The Doctor is brilliant. She's amazing. She is literally the most impressive person I've ever met. I mean, at one point…' Martha glanced up, realising she was about to spout off about her previous love for the Time Lord, but she cut herself off quickly. She brushed past it, but it didn't go unnoticed. 'That doesn't matter. The Doctor is incredible. But she's also fallible.'

'No one's perfect,' Yaz countered, not sure why Martha seemed to be veering down a negative path. Martha caught her eye.

'Quite right.' She paused. 'The travelling, hopping from different planets, experiencing all sorts of cultures, it's the stuff of dreams. And when The Doctor beckons you, and only you, it makes you feel special. Like you're important.' Martha looked off distantly for a moment, clearly remembering when it was her time with The Doctor. Oh, what she would have given up for that man.

But also look at what she had given up.

Martha shook herself out of her reverie, and back to the present. Martha could almost see a younger version of herself reflected back at her in Yaz. The wide-eyed eagerness, the loyalty, the thirst for knowledge. And, she couldn't be sure, but she also wondered if Yaz had a thing for The Doctor. She wouldn't be surprised.

'So why aren't you travelling with her now?' Yaz asked directly. Every time Martha spoke about her time with The Doctor, there was an edge, a sadness to the way she carried herself.

'It's a long story.'

'I want to hear it.' Yaz extended her hand out, as if to shake hands. 'Friend.' Martha smiled, and shook hands with Yaz. Seems the forgiveness was coming along nicely.

'There were a few reasons. One, was that there was one particular adventure that left my family scarred. A certain encounter with The Master…'

'Oh my god, I've met him!' Yaz couldn't help but call out. Martha's eyes widened in horror.

'You have?!' She exclaimed.

'Yeah, dark skin, manic smile, completely bananas. Murdering psychopath. Not hard to forget.'

'He was blonde when I knew him, but the rest of that description is spot on. But… he can't be…' Martha sounded so wounded that Yaz couldn't help but put a hand on hers in comfort. 'He was dead. He died. His wife shot him. The Doctor mourned him.' Yaz shook her head sadly.

'I'm so sorry Martha, but assuming it's the same guy… he's very much alive.' Martha remained in shock for a few more moments, before trying to steel herself into a more neutral stance.

'Right. Okay. One problem at a time. First we get The Doctor back. Then we deal with him.' She almost spat out the word 'him.' There was so much venom in her voice, Yaz nearly recoiled.

'So it was The Master that made you leave?' Yaz asked softly.

'Well, sort of. He tortured my family for a year. Once it was all over, they needed me to take care of them, and that meant I had to stop travelling.'

'Oh Martha, I'm so sorry. That must have been really hard.'

'It was. Good news is, they're okay now. More than okay. Their recovery has been a long road, but they are getting better each day.'

'That's really great, good for them.'

Martha looked at Yaz, questions burning in her eyes.

'Do your family know The Doctor, Yaz?'

'Yeah, they've met her. Even helped bring down some huge spiders trying to take over Sheffield.' Martha gave her a funny look, and Yaz continued. 'Yeah, that was a weird day. She's been to tea at mine a couple of times. My parents like her. My sister thinks she's weird, but then she's not wrong.'

'Do they know about the space and time travel?' Martha asked. Yaz chewed her lip nervously.

'Not exactly, no. Mum gets a bit suspicious, but I tell them I've been seconded when I go travelling. It's just easier.'

Yaz didn't understand why Martha was looking at her so sadly. Why she was asking about her family so much.

'I didn't tell my family. Then The Master got hold of them and tortured them. All because I was connected to The Doctor, and they were connected to me.' Yaz's mouth fell open in shock. She felt horror as she imagined The Master going anywhere near her unsuspecting family. 'It's not The Doctor's fault, Yaz. But, she does attract danger. It's all fun and games, until it's not.'

Yaz couldn't help but think of Grace.

'Ryan and Graham are family. Graham was married to this lovely lady, Grace, who was Ryan's Nan. She died the night we met The Doctor. She died trying to save Ryan and me, but ended up falling. So not The Doctor's fault, but…' she didn't have to say it. Martha knew.

'The Doctor is worth the monsters, Yaz. But sometimes, you have to think, is it worth the damage it does to those who are left behind?'

'Why are you telling me all this?' Yaz asked, now wishing she hadn't asked about the nostalgia trip.

'You asked why I wasn't travelling with The Doctor anymore. That's a huge part of it.'

'But what about the Doctor? Who picks up the pieces after you leave?'

Martha let out a huge sigh she'd been holding in. She hadn't wanted to tell Yaz the whole truth, but now she felt like she owed the younger companion more honesty.

'Yaz, there's another reason I had to leave. I'm not sure you're going to want to hear it.'

'Why not?' Yaz asked, feeling the knot returning. To be honest, it had never really left.

'Okay, before I do, I just want you to know that I'm happily married to Mickey, and love him to bits. This was over 10 years ago, and it doesn't affect anything now.' Yaz looked at her in confusion. Where was this going?

'Okay…just tell me.'

'Alright.' Martha took a deep breath, already hating this. She always looked back at this part of her life with embarrassment, at how young and naïve she had been to not see that her love was unreciprocated. 'When I travelled with The Doctor, I was in love with him. Deeply.'

Oh.

'Oh, okay.' Yaz replied, not sure how to respond. Now she felt the knot tighten, so tight that she had lost any appetite she had had.

'I can see that doesn't fill you with joy,' Martha remarked astutely. Damn, was Yaz so easily readable?

'What do you mean? I'm neutral. I'm…'

'Totally hung up on The Doctor?'

'I… I… don't know… we're friends…' She hadn't planned on coming out to Martha, and now she really didn't want to. However, it looked like Martha saw straight through her younger counterpart.

'Yaz, it's okay. I should reiterate, I 'was' in love. I'm not anymore.' Okay, the knot loosened a little. Not completely, but a little.

'What happened?' Yaz asked quietly. The idea of The Doctor with someone else filled her with a deep dread, even if it had happened in the past. Martha chuckled sadly in response.

'Let's just say, his heart was set on another. He didn't look at me the way I wanted. Sure, he liked me as a friend. But nothing more.'

Yaz knew that pain alright.

'I'm sorry, Martha. That must have been really tough.'

'It was, at the time. He didn't mean to, but he would go on about Rose all the time, and I felt like I could never measure up to her.'

'Who's Rose?' Yep, the knot was tightening again. Yaz had heard the name mentioned before, briefly.

'Rose Tyler. The golden girl. She was the companion before me. I used to be so jealous of her, but then I actually met her and was blown away. She was amazing.' Wow, if Martha was jealous of her, Martha, who was incredible, then Rose must be out of this world.

'So what happened to her?' Yaz asked, trying to not let the anxiety creep into her voice.

'She ended up in a parallel world with her family, and a human version of The Doctor. She got her happy ending.' Martha was wistful, but sounded genuinely happy for Rose. Yaz tried to process the words 'parallel world' and 'human version of The Doctor.' It was a lot to take in.

'Good for her,' Yaz uttered.

'Anyway, it came to a point where I just couldn't take The Doctor not loving me in the way I wanted. So, I got out. He was understanding, and we remained friends, but for my own sake I had to get out.'

Yaz nodded in understanding. She fully understood now how someone could walk away from The Doctor. If they were in pain, if they had responsibilities higher than The Doctor, then it was the right decision. But where did that leave Yaz?

Martha seemed to clock Yaz's internal conflict.

'So, what about you, Yaz? Are you one of the lucky ones to be loved by The Doctor?'

'I… I don't know.' She paused. 'I mean, before she vanished, we sort of… kissed. A few times.' She looked up at Martha, checking that this was okay to discuss. Martha looked genuinely happy for her.

'Oh my god, Yaz, that's so exciting!'

'Are you sure you want me to talk about it? Given your history…'

'Oh Yaz, you're adorable. As I mentioned earlier, I'm happily married to Mickey, and have been over The Doctor for a decade. So go, on what was it like?'

Yaz wasn't sure how to respond. Her relationship with The Doctor was still so new, but her feelings were a lot deeper than they should be for a relationship so young. She'd barely come out to Ryan, and now The Doctor was gone. Everything just felt wrong.

But Martha was becoming her friend. Besides, Yaz had been dying to talk to someone properly about the night before. Why not give Martha a shot?

'Okay, so… it's still really, really new. We only really discovered each other last night, but…' Yaz couldn't help but smile, for the first time since The Doctor's disappearance. 'I shouldn't kiss and tell… but… she's very good.'

Martha looked like she was trying to suppress a squeal. It was good to see that the sophisticated agent could be just as dorky as Yaz.

'Yaz, that's so exciting!'

'Yeah, it was… have you ever… you know, kissed her?' Yaz asked, nervous again.

'Only once, when we first met. It was to save my life. Genetic transference or something. Hardly romantic.' The knot was starting to ease more.

'To be fair, that does sound very Doctor-y.' Yaz contemplated. Martha smiled.

'So, who started it? Did she kiss you?'

'Actually… I kissed her first…'

'Wow.' Martha said, genuinely impressed. 'You're gutsier than I ever was. What led up to it?'

'Well, we'd been drinking on a night out…'

'The Doctor on a night out? Now that's something I have to see!'

'And you will, when we get her back,' Yaz said confidently. She continued her tale, confidence suddenly increasing. 'We'd bumped into my ex and we had to pretend to be in a relationship together…'

'Why?'

'Well, you've met Ryan. He sort of blurted it out by accident.'

'Oh god, I can just imagine it.' Martha grimaced.

'Anyway, we broke away and went for a midnight picnic. I started telling her some… pretty deep stuff about myself. Cue tears. You can imagine, drinking, seeing an ex, emotions were everywhere.' Martha nodded in understanding, letting Yaz continue. 'The Doctor listened to me, and then launched into one of her empowering speeches. I'm guessing your Doctor did that too?'

'Oh yeah, all the time.'

'So, anyway, she's babbling away, and I just couldn't help myself. It just happened.'

'How did she react?'

'She was pretty stunned for moment. I thought I'd made a huge mistake… but then she started kissing back.'

'Yaz, that's amazing! Then what happened?'

'A police officer saw us trespassing and started chasing us. So we legged it.' Martha laughed at the story.

'That's so The Doctor. Sounds like she just can't help herself. Romance, with a dash of action.' Yaz laughed.

'It was hilarious. We were running so fast, and then we hid from the police officer. We got away.' She paused, realising she was approaching the saddest part of the story. 'We watched the sunrise, and that was the last time I saw her.' She could feel her eyes welling up again. Martha reached across the table to squeeze her hand in comfort.

'Well, that sounds like an epic first kiss. And you know what, Yaz? There will be many more. Because we are going to get her back.'

Yaz smiled at her, grateful for the thought. She squeezed back and let Martha retract her hand.

'So, does The Doctor make it a habit to, you know, kiss new companions to save their lives?'

Martha seemed to contemplate that for a moment.

'Depends on the companion. My Doctor was very… er…kissy. I suspect Rose would have had one. Jack certainly did. I know Donna said she had a go, but that was her saving his life. The way she told it was bloody hilarious…'

'Who's Donna?' There goes the knot again. Another name on the list.

'Oh no, there was nothing romantic between Donna and The Doctor. She pretty much told him that from the start, and I loved her for it. She took no shit from him.' Martha paused, thinking about her friend, the woman who saved all the universes. The woman who could no longer remember what she'd achieved. 'She was the companion after me. We were good friends.'

'What happened to her?' Yaz asked patiently, knowing that Donna's ending was going to be sadder than Martha's.

'She's still alive. The Doctor ensured that. Donna saved everything in creation. But she took on too much power, and it was killing her. The Doctor had to wipe her memory of him to save her life.'

At least she was still alive, Yaz thought to herself. But to be forced to forget about The Doctor? About all their adventures together? That sounded like hell.

'That's awful.' She didn't know what else to say. The Doctor's previous companions all sounded like such powerful, inspirational people. But then they ended up either heartbroken, hurt, forgetful, or worse.

It couldn't have been easy on The Doctor either. To have to lose all those people, while she lived on. It was torture.

One day they would have to lose each other, she realised. If she hadn't lost her already.

'Is that why you keep warning me?' Yaz finally asked, looking up at Martha. Martha blinked in surprise, and looked a little guilty.

'How old are you, Yaz?'

'I'm 20.'

'Oh god, you're even younger than I was…'

'Age is just a number though!'

'No, no, it's not the age gap I'm worried about it.' Martha paused, then stared directly into Yaz's soul. 'I mean, you still have your whole life ahead of you. You haven't finished your probation yet, and it's important for your life to go on. The Doctor shouldn't be your whole world, y'know?'

'She's not! I have my police work, I have my family. I have Ryan and Graham.'

'Okay, that's good Yaz. It's just, I know how intense life with The Doctor can be. I just want you to know that there are options, if… if, you wanted space from her.'

Yaz thought about what Martha was saying. Their situations were different, and Yaz's family hadn't gone through hell like Martha's. She could see how Martha would feel resentful towards The Doctor, but that wasn't Yaz. At least, not yet. But would it be, one day?

One thing at a time, Khan. We've got to find the beloved alien first. Worry about the future later.

'Thanks Martha, I appreciated what you're saying to me. I've got a lot to think about.'

Martha looked relieved.

'Hey, Yaz, you know what? I haven't actually seen a picture of your Doctor yet. Can you show me one?'

'Sure!' Glad for the change of intensity, Yaz got out her phone. She scrolled through some of her photos, and came across a few candids she'd taken of her friend on their adventures. She handed the phone over to Martha. Martha swiped at the photos, drinking in new images of her old friend. She smiled.

'No fair. How come she gets to be attractive as a man and as a woman?'

Yaz shrugged her shoulders.

'You know, Martha, sometimes life just isn't fair… she is gorgeous though, isn't she?'

'Very. Damn Yaz, you are one lucky human.' She looked up at Yaz, and handed back her phone. 'And The Doctor is a very lucky woman.' Yaz put her phone away, smiling shyly.

'Thanks Martha.'

The air was certainly cleared between them, and by the time their pizza arrived, they both knew that their friendship would grow strong.

It was just a shame that two certain stalkers were about to make their night more complicated.