It takes four days before Santana will look at her own breasts. Their first night back at home, after careful cuddles with Liam, and a lot of icing, Santana asks Brittany again to look at them, and she does. She removes the bandages so gently, so lovingly, and she checks the incisions, checks if all, assuring Santana that it looks good. But Santana can't bring herself to do it right away. She fights with herself, wanting to know, but not wanting to see, wanting to see, not wanting to know, like some sort of deranged seesaw.
When she finally brings herself to look, Brittany is downstairs with Liam. Given the amount of painkillers she's been taking, Santana has been sleeping a lot, but when she gets up to go to the bathroom, she stands in front of the mirror, contemplating lifting up her shirt. She does it slowly, so slowly. Her nipple is covered with a fresh gauze pad, and the undersides of her breast are still taped up. Carefully, she cups her breasts, feeling the weight change in her hands, watching her fingers splay out over the remaining scars, pulled taught by the removal of the extra skin. Carefully, she pulls back the gauze on her nipple, gasping at the swelling, gasping again at the wholeness of it. Tears prick the back of her throat, but she pushes them down, hiccuping a little. She didn't have surgery for aesthetic purposes, but for the first time in sixteen years, she doesn't feel disgusted looking in the mirror. They're certainly not normal, by any means, but they're not…hideous.
After the first days of laying in bed, Santana eases back into her daily routine at home. She cooks dinner with Brittany, she does bed time with Liam, she goes over all the court paperwork, and she gets ready for her motherhood to become a legal reality.
They wait to tell Liam until the morning of their hearing. They'd discussed it, and figured it would be better to do it that way. To him, Santana is already his Mommy Noodle, to him, a piece of paper means nothing. But to Santana, and to Brittany too, it means a lot. It means if anything happens to Brittany—universe forbid—no one can take Santana's son away. It means Santana can get him medical attention, it means she can make decisions for him, it means that her parenthood is preserved always.
Carefully, Santana lays out Liam's clothes as Brittany gives him a bath. She's not quite well enough to bathe him herself yet—the bending and lifting is too painful—but she wants to be part of getting it ready. So she smooths out his little khaki pants, his deep red shirt, his tiny suspenders and blue tie. She takes his good shoes from the closet, and she sets them besides everything else. Her stomach flip flops with excitement, her fingers ghost over his collar, and she smiles, thinking this little boy she loves, all dressed up for such a big occasion.
"Mommy Noodle! I taked a bath in the morning!" He runs into the bedroom naked and giggling. "Smell me! I smell yummy! Like choc'late!"
"Mmm." Santana bends to smell his hair, wincing a little at the tightness on her sides. "You do smell like chocolate. C'mere, let's get you dressed, okay?"
"Okey! Where we goin' today?"
"Somewhere very special." Brittany steps into the room holding Liam's towel. "Remember how me and Mommy Noodle got married?"
"Yeah! We havin' a new weddin'?"
"No." She laughs, lifting him up in the towel to finish drying his hair. "But it's a little bit like that. We're going to go to what's called a hearing."
"You silly, Mama, I already hear good!" He pulls on his ear and giggles again.
"You do, buddy." Brittany kisses his head. "But this is something very different."
"We're going to—" Santana starts, and looks to Brittany, who nods. "We're going to see a lady who's going to tell us that I get to be your Mommy Noodle forever."
"Mommy Noodle, you silly! You already is Mommy Noodle!"
"That's true, I am? But you know what?"
"What?" He reaches out to play with her hair, and she leans in, wishing she could lift him up.
"The judge, the lady we're going to see, doesn't know that yet. She still thinks I'm only Doctor Santana, and we need to talk to her."
"I tell her you my Mommy Noodle, and I Sir! She silly!"
"I'd love that a lot, Sir." She kisses between his eyes. "We're going to get dressed up really nice, and then after, we're going to have dinner with Gramma and Grampa, and my mama too."
"Gramma and Grampa and Mari-bel! Okey! Le's go!"
As Santana dresses Liam, buttoning up his shirt, and tying his tie, she feels Brittany's eyes on her, she feels Brittany's smile, she feels her love, beaming from her. Once he's ready, he comes into their bedroom with them, and he sits on the floor, playing with his trains, while they get dressed. Santana slips into a loose fitting black dress, not wanting to irritate her breasts, and wanting to look more…mom-like. She stands at the mirror, straightening her hair, and she steals glances with Brittany, who slides into a gray pencil skirt and blue blouse, glasses on top of her head.
They take a cab downtown to family court. There's still snow everywhere, and finding parking will be a nightmare. Liam is nestled between them, peering out from over his scarf, and rolling Percy up Santana's leg. Her stomach rolls, her heart hammers, but it's all in the best possible way. They're doing this, they're really doing it.
Her mom and Brittany's parents are already at the courthouse when they get there. Maribel grins and kisses Santana's cheeks, while Whitney squeezes her hands and reminds her with nothing more than a smile of the conversation they had in Mexico. They don't need the support, not legally, but having them al here makes Santana feel so much more secure, it makes her feel like the judge can see what kind of family they have, how Santana adds to his life, how she loves him, and her mother loves him, so dearly.
They sit down beside Brittany's attorney—or, rather, their attorney. Liam wiggles in his seat, and Santana takes crayons from her purse, taping a coloring page from the table. It's a trick she learned, since he struggles to hold it, even still, with his right hand, and Liam's eyes light up, dragging the pink crayon across the page.
"Mama, I tell her now?"
"Not yet, Li." Brittany whisper-laughs, hugging him to her side. "I'm going to talk to her, and then Mommy Noodle, okay?"
"Okey! I give her my pitcher?"
"I think she might like that a lot."
"All rise for the Honorable Judge Scanlon." The bailiff announces, and Santana takes her eyes off of Liam to look forward. Behind her back, Brittany grabs her hand, and she squeezes it tight.
Santana knows it isn't like the movies. She knows there's no cross-examining, or intense questioning, she knows that the judge has already reviewed their paperwork, that they'll just give a statement, that they'll agree to raise Liam together, and request a new birth certificate, nothing too intense, but still, her knees still buckle a little in anticipation of it all.
"Dr. Lopez, Dr. Pierce, Liam Pierce, please approach the bench."
"I got a seat, Mommy Noodle." Liam whispers. "I no need a new one."
"It's a different kind of bench, Sir, we don't have to sit. We're going to stand up and talk to Judge Scanlon now, okay?"
"Okey! I need my pitcher!"
"Here we go." Santana quickly takes it off and hands it to him, stepping out when Brittany pushes her chair in.
"State your names for the court." Judge Scanlon tells them, when they've reached the bench.
"Dr. Santana Maria Lopez."
"Dr. Brittany Susan Pierce, and my son, Liam Connolly Pierce."
"That's me! Liam! And I made you a pitcher!"
"You made me a picture, huh?" Judge Scanlon leans over the bench and accepts the pink tiger that Liam hands over to her. "Well thank you. Now I'm going to ask a few questions to your moms, alright?"
"And then I tell you this is my Mommy Noodle?" He hugs Santana's leg, beaming. "She not Doccer Santana no more."
"Thank you for telling me that, Liam. It's very helpful." She smiles. "Now, Dr. Pierce, your intention is to allow for the second parent adoption of Liam by Dr. Lopez?"
"Yes it is, your honor." Brittany nods. "She and I were married last month, and she's an active mother figure to my Liam."
"And you understand that a legal adoption means you share equal legal, medical and financial responsibility and decision making about Liam with Dr. Lopez, even if your marriage should end."
"Yes, your honor, I understand that."
"Now, I have to ask, because there's record of a kinship adoption in the paperwork you sent me. You adopted Liam yourself in 2014?"
"Yes, your honor. My sister and her husband left custody of Liam to me when they passed away. I chose to adopt him, rather than simply continue legal guardianship."
"I'm sorry for your loss, Dr. Pierce."
"Thank you, your honor." Brittany nods. "But I consider myself very lucky that I have Liam, and I know my sister would be thrilled to see a mother like Santana in his life."
"Dr. Lopez." Santana steps a little closer at the sound of her name, and wrings her hands in front of her. "Do you understand the responsibilities of adopting Liam Pierce? That you will be equally responsible for his heath and well being, his financial, educational, and emotional needs, regardless of your relationship with Dr. Pierce?"
"Yes, your honor." Santana looks down at Liam, gaping up at the American flags that hang above the bench. "I understand completely."
"And you believe yourself capable of fulfilling those obligations, as well as providing love and emotional stability for him?"
"I do, your honor."
"And are you seeking a name change on his behalf?"
"Oh…I…" Santana turns to face Brittany. "No, I don't think so."
"Excuse me, your honor." Brittany looks back at Judge Scanlon. "I'm sorry to take advantage of your time, but can we have a moment?"
"Go ahead." She nods, and Brittany steps back, gesturing for Santana to come closer.
"Santana, is that something you want?"
"Wait, what?"
"Do you want to hyphenate his name? I know we decided to keep our own names, but that doesn't mean Liam shouldn't have yours too."
"Britt, I can't ask you to do that, I mean…"
"You're not asking me, I'm asking you. Can we give our son your last name?"
"I…really?"
"Yeah, really."
"Okay…yeah. Yeah, I'd love that."
"Good." Brittany grabs Santana's hand and kisses the back of it, before stepping back in front of the bench. "Your honor, I'd like to request a name change to include Santana's."
"Alright then, I'll have you fill out another form to submit with the request for a new birth certificate." She writes something down, and Liam stands up on his tiptoes, not completely aware of what's happening, but interested, nonetheless. "Dr. Santana Lopez, your petition to adopt minor child Liam Connolly Pierce is granted."
"Oh my God." Santana covers her mouth. She's not surprised, she knew this was just a formality, but still, it takes her breath away.
"Liam." Judge Scanlon looks over the bench at Liam, holding up her gavel. "Would you like to bang this for me?"
"Yes! Yes! I do it!"
"Okay, Li." Brittany beams, lifting him up, here you go."
Liam debates what hand to use, and takes it with his right one first, trying to wrap his fingers tightly, before, switching to his stronger hand. He giggles with glee as he hammers it hard, and he wraps his little arms around Santana when he's done. Santana hugs him back, as tight as she can without hurting herself, and Brittany leans in to kiss her lips, as they both shed tears. Her wife, her son.
"I telleded her you my Mommy Noodle, and I bangded the hammer!"
"You did, Sir." Santana kisses his face over and over. "And you did a great job."