Santana doesn't get sick. Well, that's not entirely true. Santana doesn't vomit. Instead, she walks around for three weeks feeling like she might every waking hour of her day, and gagging when she drops by the fertility clinic to have the nurse draw her blood and tell her that her hGC levels are rising really quickly. She's queasy and exhausted, and some nights, she falls asleep in Liam's bed before she even finishes reading to him. She aches everywhere, and her breasts, despite how they've healed, feel like hot rocks against her rib cage, angry and swollen.

They haven't told anyone yet. Together, they'd decided that, even before they got the results of the pregnancy test, and they've stuck to it. Santana is still concerned, though her raging pregnancy symptoms have at least convinced her that the blood work isn't wrong. She's concerned, because she's wholly responsible for this, because every single thing she does now effects not just one someone else, but her entire family, her wife, who she loves more than anything in the world. So they'll wait.

They sign Liam up for gymnastics. His physical therapist thinks it will be good for him to do something like that, and though Santana is nervous about it, nervous that he's so small, nervous that he still heavily favors his right arm, nervous that he might get hurt, she has to agree. He should tumble around on the mats, he should learn how to balance, he should laugh and play, before anything like that gets too intense for it to be fun anymore.

At six-twenty-two on Saturday morning, Santana wakes up to Liam's nose pressed against the side of her face. She slept like crap, and her head hurts, but she tries not to groan as she opens her eyes. He's wearing the new sweatpants they bought him for class on backwards, with his pajama top, and a grin splits his face. Headache or not, Santana has to smile at him, so excited he could burst, and she blearily pulls him up into the bed with them.

"Mommy Noodle! I gots gynnastics, okey?" He giggles, burrowing his face into her shoulder.

"You do, Sir, but not for almost four more hours."

"I gots dressed, see? I need you to do a shirt."

"We need a little more sleep." She yawns, tired eyes fighting to stay open. "And then I promise I'll get your shirt on for you?"

"But Mommy Noodle! I's awake already."

"Hey Li." Brittany rolls over, stretching her arms over her head. "How about I get you dressed, and we let Mommy sleep a little longer?"

"But she needs'a come to gynnastics and see me!"

"She will." Brittany gathers him into her arms, and Santana watches her kiss the top of his head and breathe him in. "But I need help making breakfast first."

"I help! I help!" He squirms and wriggles, nearly falling off the bed.

Brittany settles him back on the floor, and leans over Santana, kissing her forehead, "Sorry, baby, I figured I'd be up before him. I know you didn't sleep."

"No, seriously don't be." Santana shakes her head. "I'm glad he's so excited. I'm going to try to sleep for like…five minutes, but then I'll be down."

"Don't rush." She kisses Santana's mouth, smiling against it. "You need the rest."

Once Brittany ushers Liam out of the room, Santana's five minutes of sleep turns into two hours. She's actually surprised she managed to sleep that much, and she stretches her arms over her head, letting out a huge yawn. The week has just been extremely long, it's windy and rainy outside the window, and as much as she'd never miss Liam's first day of gymnastics, Santana could really curl up like a cat and hide under the covers until Monday night when she switches to the overnight shift.

Dragging herself out of bed, Santana goes into the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth. As she brushes, she gags a little, and sticks her head under the sink, guzzling water as quickly as possible to suppress her nausea. When she gets herself under control, she looks in the mirror and balks. So much for a pregnancy glow, that's for sure. Having barely been able to eat more than a few bites at a time, she looks a little sickly. Under her eyes are dark, and her cheeks are abnormally hot. Her hair is everywhere, but that's to be expected after a restless first half of the night, tossing pillows and turning over and over again.

Going back into the bedroom, Santana digs through her drawers, settling finally on leggings and an old Columbia zip-up hoodie. When she pulls her pajama top over her head, she looks at her abdomen in the mirror briefly, as she's done every morning since her blood test. It still looks the same, no swelling, no tell-tale sign that she's got a rapidly multiplying ball of cells in here. She's thin, and it's her first pregnancy, she's got a lot of time before she starts to show, and her eyes drift up to her bare breasts. For how heavy they feel, they look exactly the same. Still scarred, still lined, but she'd be lying if she didn't admit that she has a little bit of a fascination with her repaired nipple. Maybe it's a weird thing to say…no, definitely it's a weird thing to say, but it looks good, it looks real, and she loves having that there.

Leaving her flat stomach and her fixed nipple aside, Santana finishes getting dressed. When she gets downstairs, the house is abnormally quiet, and she peers into the playroom and living room, before she finally finds a note on the counter for Brittany. She wanted her to have some quiet, she took Liam to the park, there's a pot of coffee, and hard boiled eggs in the fridge. Maybe Santana swoons a little over that. There's just something about these every day wife things that make her feel this surge of love for Brittany, and pouring herself a cup of coffee and snatching an egg and an orange from the refrigerator, she sits down at the table to flip through their copy of the New York Times.

The quiet is nice, and it's definitely good for Santana's raging headache, but she finds herself missing Brittany and Liam.
—

It's strange being in the house alone. Santana can't remember the last time was was. Usually, if she and Brittany are on opposite schedules, Liam is there with her, chattering away, or at night, after Liam goes to bed, it's her and Brittany, talking, planning, kissing, just being. But she's alone now, or, at least alone with the person growing inside of her, and even as a person who spent most of her life alone, it's different now.

"Mommy Noodle!" Liam cries out, as Santana pours her second cup of coffee.

"She might still be sleeping, Li." Brittany tells him quietly in the foyer, but still loud enough for Santana to hear.

"Oh no! Is there a monster in the house?" Santana calls back to him, setting her mug down on the table, and waiting for her tiny tornado to blow into her arms. It takes less than twenty seconds, and then her does, appearing like a blur, and hugging her thighs.

"Mama! Mama! She's not sleepin' no more! Mommy Noodle! Mommy Noodle! I getted you this flowers!" He presents her with a bouquet of dandelions and long strands of grass. "I pickeded them!"

"You picked these just for me? Wow, Sir, I love them so much. Thank you."

"Be careful climbing on Mommy Noodle." Brittany warns him gently, stepping into the kitchen with Liam's sweatshirt in her hands. Looking at her, Santana smiles and shakes her head, informing her that she's fine.

"I so, so careful. I no break you, Mommy Noodle!"

"I know you won't. You're very gentle on my body. Good work." She kisses his forehead. "Are you very excited about gymnastics?"

"Yes! I gonna do so many gynnastics!"

"I'm sure you will." Santana smiles, her heart glittering at the way Brittany looks at her when she talks to Liam. "And look, I'm all dressed to go!"

"We can go now, okey?"

"I think if we go now, we'll have plenty of time to take the subway, what do you think?"

"Yes! Yes! We take that subway. Mama? We take that subway."

"Sounds like Mommy made a really good call." Brittany nods, laughing. "Lets go."

As he always is, Liam is beside himself on the train, kneeling on the seat to stare at the map, giggly as he talks to people who get on and off, just overall ecstatic that he gets to be there. Santana is still nauseous, and the rocking of the train doesn't make it much better, but she smiles at her son, thrilled to see him as happy as he is.

When they get to Liam's gymnastics class, he clams up a little. He's nervous around so many new people, though he's hardly shy, and he hangs on Brittany's leg while they wait to go into the gym. Once they're inside though, and he sees the brightly colored mats, he blooms, following the instructions of his teacher to line up. Once he's settled, Santana sits down against the wall, legs crossed beneath her, and pats the floor beside her, inviting Brittany to join her.

"How are you doing?" Brittany whispers in her ear. "You looked a little queasy on the train."

"I am. But it's…what it is. It means something is happening, right?

"I'd think so, yes." She nods.

"I guess I just really need to see it, Britt, I don't know. It's stupid."

"I don't think that's stupid at all. I imagine it's a strange feeling, knowing that you have something inside of you that's completely intangible."

"Maybe that's it. Or maybe I'm just a perpetual mess of anxiety. Either one."

"Have the over the counter sleeping pills helped you at all? I know your anxiety gets worse when you don't sleep."

"A little, I guess. Unisom isn't exactly Ambien, but it's better than nothing. Maybe working nights this week will be good for me. I swear, I'm nocturnal or something."

"Do you want to switch to nights permanently?" Brittany nods in the direction of Liam, who is rolling around on the mats. Even though it's nothing, Santana wants to stand up and cheer for him, but it's part of the rules that she doesn't.

"I love him so much." She sighs happily. "He makes me smile so much."

"You should have seen him this morning. It took him twenty minutes to pick those flowers for you. He checked half the dandelions in the park to get you the best ones."

"He did not."

"Oh, he totally did. Here—" Brittany hands her phone to Santana, nudging her to swipe through the pictures. She grins, looking at Liam bent over, pockets full of dandelions.

"I'm sorry I missed it." She shrugs a little, looking back up at Liam.

"Don't be, you needed the sleep."

"To answer your question…" Santana shakes her head a little. "I don't want to switch to nights. That would mean no dinners every night with you and Liam, no waking up to his sleepy little face pressed against mine…and weekends my body would still be on a weird schedule. It's probably not good to do to myself while I'm pregnant either."

"Alright. I was just checking. We can make things work, if that's ever something you want to consider doing."

"I really appreciate that, Britt, and I'll let you know. But…I'm pretty sure it won't change. I never thought I'd get to say this, but family time is really important to me."

"Mama! Mommy Noodle! Mama! Mommy Noodle! Mommy Noodle! Mommy Noodle! Look! Look! Look!" Liam cries out from the balance beam, where he stands with his teacher's hands around his little waist. "I doin' it! I doin' it!"

"Look at you go, Li!" Brittany cheers, breaking the rules, so Santana help but follow.

"That's my little guy!" She claps, hearing the delighted laughs of the other parents as she does. "I'm so proud of you, Sir!"

Liam absolutely loves gymnastics. When it's time to leave, he becomes indignant, and Brittany has to lift him, wailing, from the ground. They know that he's exhausted from waking up so early, and from running around all morning, but still, he's inconsolable as Santana vetoes the subway and steps out off the curb and hails a cab. He cries and hiccups all the way up Broadway, and nothing either of them can say to him calms him down. Finally, when they're a block from home, he falls asleep in Brittany's arms, red faced and swollen.

Santana pays the cab driver, and Brittany gets him inside, bringing him up to his room. Downstairs, Santana considers making lunch, but the thought of anything in the house turns her stomach. Instead, she refills her water bottle, and she sinks down onto the couch, lifting their recently delivered copy of The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians from the end table, and opening to the first page. She notices, when she does, that the book isn't as crisp as she'd expected, and when she inspects it further, she notices pages earmarked, and then unfolded. Realizing that Brittany has already read it, her heart thumps in her chest, and a smile spreads across her face, tamping down her anxiety as she begins the first page.

"I'm sorry I folded up so many pages."

"You read all of these pages? Seriously, how do you find time to do the amount of reading you do?"

"When you and Liam were napping on the couch together last weekend, I didn't really want to leave, so I just sat and read."

"No, but really, are you a speed reader? Because I swear, you just absorb information like no one I've ever seen."

"A little." Brittany laughs, squeezing the orange in her hand and sitting down beside Santana. "Right now though, I'm really focused on knowing everything there is to know about what you're going through. I know you're anxious, and I'm making it my job to be the most supportive spouse there is."

"Brittany?"

"Yeah?"

"Seriously though, why are you like this? I honestly want to know what your parents did to make you this incredibly sensitive and compassionate person, full of so much love. You make me feel cherished, and just…safe, every day."

"I love you, Santana, and that's what I have to offer you."

"You're basically the most brilliant plastic surgeon to ever live, you're gorgeous, you're kind of rich…I think you'd have been a huge catch even if you weren't. Which…makes it more amazing or something, I don't know."

"Someday you'll see what a catch you were for me. And you'll see how much I love your big heart, and the total joy you bring to my life."

"I'm not sure anyone has ever used those words to describe me."

"I know." Brittany sighs, as Santana scoots over and lays her head in her lap. Setting her orange on the table, Brittany runs her fingers through Santana's hair, and Santana hums contentedly. "But I mean them. The joy you bring into my life, and into Liam's life is like nothing else, and I'm so lucky to have you."

"Mmm, feels good." Santana closes her eyes at the sensation of Brittany's hands on her scalp. "Helps the ick feeling. That should be a medical term."

"Absolutely." She laughs.

"Brittany?"

"Yes?"

"I've been thinking about what to do with the baby after they're born. I can't even believe I'm already talking about this, but I've just been thinking about how that day care is swarming with germs. If we're both going to go back to work after six weeks, I don't know if I'm comfortable putting a newborn in there."

"I agree with you completely. I think we're going to have to figure out something new anyway. With Liam starting preschool in the fall, I'm just not sure how we'll be able to manage that schedule change without coming up with a new solution."

"Are we…I mean, are we considering a nanny? I'm new at this kid thing, so…"

"I had someone part time in Boston." Brittany nods. "More of an on-call kind of thing, when last minute things came up at the hospital, and my parents couldn't take Liam. They were really good about working with my schedule, but sometimes, it just wouldn't work."

"I feel like…I don't know, Brittany, I feel like having someone full time is different. I don't know if I'm comfortable with that either." Santana purses her lips, and thinks on it. "I wonder if my mom would be willing to help out at all. I feel like maybe I'd feel better about that, than a stranger. I don't know."

"There's nothing I want less than to make you do something that you're not comfortable with, sweetheart." Brittany presses her thumbs into Santana's temples gently. "And I like the idea of having your mom to help. She's so good with Liam."

"She is. I swear, I think she was really convinced she's never have grandkids, and now she's beside herself over him. Not that he's not really easy to beside yourself over. But, I think given that, she'll be a really easy sell."

"My parents are coming down the weekend after next." Brittany nudges Santana's cheek a little. "You'll have had your first ultrasound by then."

"I was thinking about that before." She yawns and arches her back. "I think we should tell them."

"You think? I'd like to, but not if you're not ready."

"Honestly, once I know there's a heartbeat, I feel comfortable telling them. Our friends, work, Liam, I'd rather wait until after twelve weeks, but our parents are okay. Then I can talk to my mom too, prepare her to maybe step in when Liam starts school."

"So many big things are happening this year." Brittany marvels, leaning down to kiss Santana's lips.

"I guess we didn't waste any time, did we?"

"No." She shakes her head, laughing. "And I'm glad we didn't."

"Do you care if I sleep for like…an hour?" Santana turns her body, and settles her head more comfortably in Brittany's lap.

"Go ahead, I'll just finish this book, and maybe I'll actually start the novel that's been sitting under the magazines for six months."

"Okay, Evelyn Wood." She yawns again and stretches out. "I'll leave you to it. Let me know what you learn."

"Of course, honey. Goodnight."