Santana gets the call into Shelby's office. She'd been bracing herself for it to come, but when it does, she's devastated. Shelby promises her that it's just something with legal, that they have to put her on administrative leave for two weeks while they work on the settlement, but Santana feels awful. She doesn't want to go up to Brittany's office and put her in a compromising position so she just takes a cab home. When she gets there, she tells her mom that she absolutely doesn't want to talk about it and she takes over with Liam and the twins, telling her mother that she'll be home for the next two weeks.
"Mommy Noodle, are you sick?" Liam asks.
"No, Sir, the hospital is just giving me a little break so I can spend time with my favorite boys."
"Is Mama getting a break too?"
"I wish she was, bud, but Mama's really busy, they can't spare her."
"Is she coming home to have dinner with us?"
"We'll see." Santana's smile falters. "But we'll make something good just in case."
Santana spends the day savoring the time she has with her boys but she can't help but be anxious waiting for Brittany to come home. Around 4:00 she gets a text from Brittany that just tells her she loves her and she knows the paperwork for her suspension has come across her desk. Sighing heavily, Santana tells Brittany that she loves her too, then starts dinner, trying to let Liam eat earlier than he normally does because she knows they feed him too late. After she eats with him, she makes a plate for Brittany and then she saves cleanup until after everyone is settled in bed.
She's just sitting with the twins, rocking them to sleep when Brittany comes in. She takes both Max and Oliver into her arms and Santana gives her a look of silent gratitude as she steps out and goes to Liam's room where he's playing with the trains in the floor. He pretends not to see her there and keeps playing but Santana crouches beside him and gently lifts him up into her arms.
"Time for books, Li."
"How about I read?" Brittany appears at the door.
"Mama! Mama! Will Mommy Noodle listen?"
"Of course I'll listen." Santana smiles, though smiling feels hard.
Brittany reads two books and then Liam falls asleep before she can finish the third. Santana kisses him goodnight and slips out of the room, giving Brittany a moment with him as she changes into her pajamas. When Brittany comes into the room, she doesn't say a word, she just wraps Santana in a tight embrace and for the first time today, she breaks down sobbing.
"Oh, honey." Brittany soothes, holding her close. "It's going to be okay."
"I've never been in trouble before." She cries. "My whole life..."
"Sue is coming back on Friday, she wants to deal with this herself because I'm ineffectual as acting chief when I can't get involved."
"What is she going to do?"
"She's going to deal with legal. You have a spotless record, they're just going to settle out of court. I promise you, you'll be back at work soon."
"I just...my job." Santana feels like she can do nothing but cry and she clings to Brittany like a lifeline.
"Let me take care of you tonight."
"You've had a long day..."
"My day hasn't been too long to take care of my wife who has had a much worse day than I have. Let me run you a bath and get you a glass of wine, then I'll give you a massage."
"Will you come in the tub with me?"
"If that's what you want, then yes."
Santana sits down, still sniffling, on the edge of the bed while Brittany goes into the bathroom and then goes downstairs, coming up with two glasses of red wine. They look at the twins sleeping beside the bed, and then they go into the bathroom, taking their alone time together. Once they're in the tub, Santana's whole body sighs into Brittany's and she just focuses on the feeling of her arms around her waist, drawing circles on her abdomen.
"Unique came to my office today." Brittany tells Santana quietly. "She heard what happened and she just wanted me to know that you've been her mentor and you always taught her to take the most pressing case first. Your department has your back and so does the hospital."
"I just...don't get why they had to suspend me."
"Because it makes the hospital look like they're taking the investigation seriously. As soon as there's an offer on the table then you're cleared to come back."
"It's just such bullshit. If there would have been enough staff in my goddamn department, this wouldn't have happened."
"I know and you're taking the fall for the hospital's mistake. They know that and that's why they won't keep you out long. Baby, I swear, if I could have done something..."
"Brittany." Santana sighs. "I know there was nothing you could have done. They don't even want you involved with it. Sue is coming back because it's such a disaster. And none of that even matters to me, I just feel so awful that I can't breathe."
"I know how much your job means to you, it means as much as mine does. I've been where you are and there's nothing I can say to make it better."
"Having your arms around me makes me feel like I'm not going to die. Not being able to go to you today..."
"I know." Brittany kisses her hard on the top of the head. "All I wanted was to be able to take you in my arms. But once Sue is back in charge, I can just be your wife and I can be by your side through all of it."
"I need that so much."
After they get out of the tub, Brittany wraps Santana up in a towel and leads her to the bed. Santana pulls on her softest, most comfortable pajamas and she lays down on top of the covers, letting Brittany sit on her back and massage every kink and knot out of her. Between the wine and the touching she manages to relax enough that she doesn't feel like her head is going to explode and she only cries a little while she's being massaged. When Brittany's done, she helps Santana under the blankets and Santana curls into her arms, falling asleep with her head on Brittany's chest, listening to her heartbeat.
She wakes up throughout the night to feed the boys and she never really settles into a deep sleep. There's so much stress bearing down on her and though she knows that Liam, Max and Oliver will be glad to have her home, she'll miss the hospital every second, the same way she misses the boys every second while she's there. In the morning, she wakes up to Brittany standing at the dresser getting dressed for work and she just watches her in the low light, knowing that this whole thing has caused an excess amount of stress for her as well. She hopes that maybe Sue will give her a day or two off when she gets back, let her recover from the long hours she's put in, let her just be with her family when times are trying.
"Mommy Noodle." Liam looks at her while she's feeding him breakfast. "Why are you sad?"
"Why do you think I'm sad, Li?"
"Because you was crying when you saw Mama in my bedroom and you have a frowny face on now."
"I'm sorry, buddy. I'll try to be happier, okay?"
"Mama says if we feel sad it's okay, but then she gives me lots of hugs." Liam stands from the table and goes to Santana's side, wrapping his little arms around her. "Since Mama's at work, I can give you all the hugs."
"Thank you, Liam." Santana lifts him into her arms and squeezes him tight. "I needed a hug from you today."
Santana goes through the routine of the day, cleaning up the house as best as she can since they haven't done it in awhile, nursing the twins, letting the three boys play in the living room, getting them down for naps, taking care of Liam's lunch, all the things that she thinks her mom probably does with much greater ease. While they're all napping, she sits on the couch and looks through one of her pediatric surgical journals, figuring if she can't be at work, she can at least be reading up on what's new. She's engrossed in an article when the doorbell rings and she jumps up, getting it before it rings again and wakes the boys.
"Mercedes." She opens the door. "You're on nights, why are you not sleeping?"
"I got enough. I'm here because I know you're feeling like shit and you didn't even want to call me and tell me." Mercedes comes into the house and sits down on the couch. "But we're here for each other for everything. So I'm here."
"Is it all over the hospital?"
"Girl, you know the interns gossip about everything. I heard it as soon as I got to the hospital last night but I didn't want to text you when I knew you were probably hashing it out with Brittany."
"Yeah, we were. Sylvester's coming back tomorrow, so..."
"A month ago, you would have been ecstatic about that."
"Well, it's hard to be thrilled when the reason she's coming back is because I fucked up. 'Ce, listen, can I tell you something I didn't tell Brittany?"
"Obviously. I'm here to be your sounding board."
"I'm afraid that her being married to me is going to compromise her eventual inevitable trajectory toward chief. This just sort of proved to everyone that she has a conflict of interest in the hospital."
"Oh, please." Mercedes rolls her eyes. "Everyone's got some kind of conflict of interest. If she was the real chief instead of the acting chief she would have been experienced enough to know how to deal with it. This was just bad timing, it's not going to ruin her career."
"The last thing I want is to compromise her dreams. But I know if I tell her that, she's going to insist that I don't and that she has this amazing dream having a family with me. Look, I get it, that's one of my dreams too, but career dreams are totally different."
"Brittany's a smart woman. If you were messing with her dreams, she'd figure out a way around it. I love you, but you're being ridiculous."
"How is it being ridiculous to worry about my wife's career, which she's been working her ass off for since she was in medical school?"
"Because if you think your wife loves her career more than she loves you, you're insane."
"I'll never get in the way of her success."
"She's going to be successful no matter what. We all know she's a shoe in when Sylvester retires. You never mess up. This whole thing is so stupid and it won't mess up Brittany's chance to be chief."
"Maybe I should change hospitals, go downtown to NYU."
"Would you listen to yourself?" Mercedes crosses her arms over her chest. "You've got a good ten years until Sylvester retires and you're talking about leaving Pres? It's your home. I think you really need to talk to Brittany about this."
"She's got so much on her plate right now..."
"You're always going to be her first priority. You and those kids. Before you start coming up with weird plans, talk to her."
"Why do you always have to be right?"
"It's a gift, obviously."
"Do you want some food or something?"
"I was actually hoping to see the kids while I was here. You've been hiding them away."
"Oliver has his neurological appointment next week. I've been such a wreck about work that I forgot to be a wreck about my kid."
"At least you're home..."
"I had the day off. So does Brittany. I made sure my mom was still coming to watch Max and Li even though I told her to take time off indefinitely."
"Are you nervous about the appointment?" Mercedes asks, fiddling with one of the couch cushions.
"It gnaws it my insides like you wouldn't believe. I started thinking about it this morning and it's just...one more thing out of my control."
"He's going to be fine."
"Mercedes, I'm a pediatric surgeon. He has an identical twin brother, I can see his development in comparison to Max's. He's behind, I'm concerned. This is just one of the many things I haven't talked to Brittany about."
"You need to have some serious heart to heart with her. This isn't like you when it comes to her, it's like you with everyone else."
"You're right." Santana sighs. "This job has just been hard on our relationship and I'm trying not to dump my problems on her."
"Dump your problems on her. She's your wife, you're legally allowed to do that."
Mercedes stays until after the boys wake up and Santana is grateful for the extra set of hands when she is nursing. Liam situates himself at Santana's feet for most of the afternoon and she tries not to get frustrated while she's attempting to do things around the house. Brittany texts her that she should be home for dinner and Santana makes pasta, thinking that it's easy even with Liam being clingy and the twins alternating crying. When Brittany walks in the door, Santana feels relief that Liam runs to her. As much as she loves her sons, sometimes it's a lot being with them alone all day and she loves that Brittany is home, loves that she can pee without someone in the bathroom with her.
"Mama, 'Cedes came over." Liam announces excitedly. "I made her pictures and Max frowed up on her."
"He did, did he? Sounds like someone still has trouble keeping his milk down." Brittany kisses Liam, then picks up Max. "Mama's home and Mommy's cooking dinner. Do you want me to take over, honey?"
"I'm good." Santana shakes her head. "Just about to drain the pasta."
"Can I steal a kiss?" Brittany comes over to Santana and Santana turns her head, letting Brittany catch her lips in a lingering kiss. "I missed you all today."
"We missed you too. A lot."
"So how does everyone feel about me having next Monday and Tuesday off?"
"Really?" Santana feels like her whole body sighs with relief. "That's the best news I've heard all day."
"Really, I talked to Sue today and she told me to move my surgical calendar around. I thought a long weekend would be nice."
"Did you have something in mind to do?"
"No, I think we both deserve a break and it won't be a break if we drive up to Boston. I think we should just do things around here, you let me cook and maybe make your breakfast in bed."
"Britt."
"You've been pulling double duty for weeks. Let me take care of you a little this weekend."
"Mama! I can help." Liam insists. "I'm a good breakfast maker. I can put the waffles in the toasty all by myself!"
"Well then I'll definitely need your help." Brittany laughs. "Look at you, growing up on me while I've been so busy at work."
They eat dinner as a family and Liam chatters all through it. Brittany lets him pick one show to watch after dinner and he sits on the couch transfixed by Paw Patrol while Santana and Brittany bring Max and Oliver upstairs to bathe them. When they come back down, Santana holding Oliver and Brittany holding Max, the show is just ending and Brittany tells him that it's time for bath. Rather than taking the twins upstairs right away, Santana leans back on the couch and positions them so they can both nurse, always feeling calmer at the last feeding of the day than she does at any other time.
When she's finished, Santana brings the boys into Liam's room so Brittany can kiss them goodnight and then she lays them down in her bedroom, watching as they fight the sleep. Once they're down for the night, Santana joins Brittany in Liam's bedroom again and she listens to Iggy Peck Architect until Liam falls asleep. With a kiss on his puckered cheek Santana smiles down at him and then Brittany follows her back downstairs where they'll put the house back in order together.
"Britt?" Santana looks over at her, where she sits putting Liam's Legos back in the bin. "I know you have off Monday and Tuesday..."
"I still have off Thursday." She reassures her wife. "Monday and Tuesday are just a little gift from Sue."
"I'm...feeling really concerned about the appointment."
"You are? I didn't know that."
"After everything that happened between us, I was trying not to add any extra stress onto all the stress you already had. It's bad enough I did that professionally..."
"You really didn't." Brittany shakes her head. "And you're my wife, Oliver is my son, if you're worried about something that concerns him, that takes priority over my work."
"He's developing slower than Max."
"I know." She puts the last of the Legos in the bin and comes over to Santana. "I see it too."
"I accept that he might have special needs, I don't want you to think I'm like...not. I just hope that I'm a good enough mom to take care of him the right way. I already know you are."
"Santana, can I tell you something?"
"Uh huh." Santana wipes the tears that form at the corners of her eyes and looks up at Brittany.
"Way back when you first met Liam, one of the first things I noticed about the way you interacted with him was the way you dealt with his arm. You were always really gentle with it, but you also didn't treat him any differently because it didn't work properly or because of his burn scars. That's how you're going to be with Oliver. And you're going to be his advocate, you're going to make sure he gets everything he could possibly need."
"I want to be that."
"You will, because you've been it for Liam in the short time you've been his mother. I have no doubts that you're amazing."
"I'm really scared of what they're going to tell us."
"Whatever it is, we're going to get through it together. I know it's harder because we're surgeons and we're fixers but it's going to be okay."
"Britt?"
"Yes?"
"Do you think that being married to me is going to hold you back in your career? I know that's totally unrelated, I've just had a lot in my head."
"Santana, what are you talking about?"
"I'm just afraid because of everything that happened in the last few weeks that having your wife work in the same hospital will keep you from getting promoted to chief. Honestly if that's the case, I'll transfer to NYU or Methodist or LIJ because—"
"Honey." Brittany strokes Santana's arms. "You being my wife is not holding me back. You need to stop getting so stuck in your head."
"It's impossible. I'm an anxious wreck."
"I really mean it when I say I want you to relax this weekend. You're all over the place and it's not good for you."
"I think...Britt, I know you have work in the morning—"
"Do you need to take an Ambien and get a good night's sleep?"
"I think so. I just feel like I haven't had one since I was pregnant. All I do is toss and turn."
"I'll get up with the boys. We have plenty of milk in the refrigerator, you should sleep."
"Are you sure it's not too much?"
"I've been neglecting what I need to do at home. I have one more day of work before my long weekend, I can handle it on limited sleep. Sue will be back, I have no surgeries. Me being there is just a formality."
"Thank you. I just feel like I can't do tomorrow without some sleep. I don't know how my mother does it all day."
"She sleeps. She's not on duty all night long, you are. I don't expect you to deal with the twins twenty-four seven just because you're not at work."
"I feel so guilty when they're near me and I don't nurse them."
"Honey, you're human and sometimes you need a break. You nurse them every night, they'll be fine with bottles tonight."
"Thank you." Santana sighed heavily, putting the last of Liam's toys away. "I just need a this."
"Are you tired? Do you want to go up to bed now?"
"Kind of. As much as I want to spend time with you tonight, I think getting to bed early will be good for both of us."
"I'd agree with that. And this weekend we'll have lots of time."
Once the downstairs is in decent shape, Santana and Brittany go up to the bedroom. While Brittany washes up, Santana changes and watches the twins as they sleep. They're such beautiful babies and sometimes it makes Santana feel like she's going to cry just looking at them. She never thought she'd make such perfect things, she never imagined that she'd love the babies she grew inside of her as much as she does, but here she is, completely enamored, no matter how overwhelmed she is.
"They're the sweetest, aren't they?" Brittany whispers.
"They really are just...something else. They're growing so fast I'm scared I can't even keep track of it."
"I love that you had them. I know that after they were born everything got difficult, and I don't know if I ever told you that you carrying our babies was one of the best things that I've ever seen."
"I wanted to do it. I think I just needed to feel like I was doing something big. My whole life has been work and then you gave me Liam and I wanted to give you something in return."
"I love you so much, Santana."
"I love you so much too."