A/N: Tearing through Chapter 45 rn and I am having quite the time with it! I would so love to be 90 percent done with writing the ski resort arc by the end of January. Hope that's not just me dreaming. In the meantime here's this chapter, another portion of the outline crossed off the list at last! I think if any of the ski resort chapters felt like a spot where I'd be okay to pause TPS and start HC again, it'd be this one. Except I simply must get to the karaoke part. It has to be done.

Thanks to ZainR for the review! Glad you liked the movie-watching fluff as much as I did! :D Though the movie choice, I have to agree with Naoi on this one... really, ski resort? (or, really, Caroline? ^^) Poor Shiruba's having a really rough go of it, huh? I love him dearly, but the fanfic brain sang "do you want to make a snowman" and I did, I really did. At least, if nothing else, it might've given him a wakeup call. Guy wasn't as humiliated as he was competitive. Masuda was over it and apparently so was Nezumi. ^^;

Enjoy!

[Chapter 44]: Brothers and Mothers

Hejjiguchi graciously accompanied them for a few more trips down the slope. When asked about Kurimu, he offered a perfect alibi – she actually felt bad for Fujimoto and had gone to check on him in the infirmary, bringing him a few snacks and comforts after she'd returned to the resort for a bathroom break. It was so in character of her that if he weren't in the know, Ayato never would've questioned it. In fact, he spent half a run down the trail debating with himself over whether it was the truth but only part of it.

A merry Kurimu rushed to meet them at the bottom of the slope after the third run and joined them for the fourth, adding a phone call with her mother to her alibi. This pacified Ami somewhat, and in no time they were laughing and screaming in sync as they skied down the hill together.

After a couple more runs as a full group, however, Hejjiguchi pulled Kurimu aside once she reached the bottom after him. Still a ways behind on the slope, Ayato watched this scene skeptically from above as it played out before his eyes.

Not much of a scene, really. The two were talking, and Hejjiguchi gestured back towards the resort, but Kurimu glanced back up at the slope for a moment before she shook her head. Hejjiguchi looked surprised and said something else, but Kurimu alternated between softening and looking troubled. She gestured up the trail and said something back, briefly clutching his hands. They spoke some more, Hejjiguchi's conflicted expression growing more visible as Ayato neared the bottom. He nodded and let go of Kurimu's hands before walking away with a wave.

"Hey – wait up, Souma-kun!" Ami exclaimed, coming up behind Ayato fast. "Where're you going?"

"I'll meet you guys back at the lodge!" he called back, turning around while walking backwards. "Think I'm done for the day. Man's gotta eat!"

"Now?" Ami hollered after him. "Will you at least meet us for dinner? Or for karaoke tonight?"

Hejjiguchi uttered a loud groan that Ayato felt deep in his soul. "Ugh… KARAOKE?"

"PLEASE?!" she wailed.

"Fiiiiine." He turned back around and at a brisker pace he went on his way.

Once they'd both stopped, Ayato turned to Ami with a shake of his head. "You have no idea the horror you may have just unleashed upon us."

Ami genuinely laughed. "Oh, give him a chance!" she replied, smiling. "He's a wonderful singer. You'll see!"

"Not if I throw myself off the mountain first," he countered.

"Don't say that!" Ami gasped, semi-laughing but also obviously concerned.

Yuri's voice came from behind. "Oh boy, what's he done now?"

"He's just being silly and dark," said Ami, turning to Yuri as the latter hummed knowingly. "Claims he'd rather die than hear Souma sing."

"Please don't die, Ayato," Yuri said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "If the rest of us have to hear it, so do you."

Ami giggled. "You two are the same brand of mean, do you know that?"

Yuri cackled but Ayato said nothing. He was still dumbfounded at Ami referring to him as silly. After the past few months, she was really building up an odd sort of tolerance to his demeanor, wasn't she? Though he supposed the same could be said for him.

Masuda having joined them, the group of five headed back up the mountain, and he didn't complain when they separated the two chairlifts by gender. Only watched thoughtfully as Yuri, Ami, and Kurimu laughed together in the seat in front of him.

It wasn't like he was ignoring Masuda next to him, anyway; he was doing the same thing.

Ami was sad when Yuri and Ayato decided to head back as well after a couple more runs, but she seemed to give them her blessing. He and Yuri walked off to do away with their equipment while Ami, Masuda, and Kurimu rode back up for "at least" one more go.

The daylight was fading, the streetlights and decorations coming to life all around the resort. Here in Shiga Kogen, it seemed the holiday season was not quite over.

"Do you want to check out the shops Kurimu was talking about yesterday?" Ayato asked. That bakery sounded good, and come to think of it, he could smell it from here. Plus he'd been meaning to get his own copy of Kamisama Suzuko at the bookstore.

Yuri breathed in and rolled her shoulders. "Hmm, maybe tomorrow," she said. "My legs can't handle walking around and shopping right now. I just wanna go back to the lodge and sit by the fire with some cocoa."

The more he thought about it, the more it made sense. "Not coffee?" he teased. "Who are you and what have you done with Yuri Nakamura?"

"I drink more than just coffee!" Yuri shot back, poking him in the arm. "Are you calling me one-dimensional?"

"Oh yeah? I dare you to go without coffee for a whole week."

"We're not playing truth or dare!"

"So what? I still dare you," he said, laughing.

"You don't want to see me after I've gone that long without caffeine," Yuri warned.

"Why? Are you vicious and scary?" Ayato grinned at her, poking her cheek. "As in, more so than usual?"

She pretended to snap at his gloved finger, pushing him away. "Ami's right, you are mean."

"Says the girl who just tried to bite me."

They walked into the lodge together, sighing as they were enveloped in its warmth. But when they headed in the direction of the drink bar to fetch that hot chocolate, they spotted Nezumi and Hejjiguchi leaning against the counter talking to each other. Or Nezumi was talking to him – lecturing, even, while Hejjiguchi was arguing back, frowning at him and then his drink with ruffled resignation.

Finally, Nezumi made a face and said something a little louder that Ayato still couldn't make out above the fire and the lodge's dull roar. Whatever he said, it made Hejjiguchi even more defensive and he pushed away from the counter.

"Well, you know what?" he retorted. "You're just like your mom!"

Nezumi blinked twice, glaring at him as he stood up too. "Dude, what?!"

"Think about it!" Hejjiguchi singsonged, turning around and walking away. He slowed when he saw Yuri and Ayato cautiously coming toward him. Behind him, Nezumi was slinking off towards the front door, patting his pockets and searching through them for something before he slipped out into the cold.

Once he was gone, Yuri asked Hejjiguchi, "What was that about?"

Hejjiguchi scratched at the back of his neck. "Oh, you know. Unsolicited opinions from a big dope."

Ayato nodded sympathetically. "I've been there."

For whatever reason, this made Hejjiguchi smile briefly, even if it was a weak one. "Even he thinks I'm a jerk for not telling Ami."

"Well, what's taking you so long?" Yuri asked, crossing her arms at him.

"What, I'm supposed to tell her here?" Hejjiguchi shrugged helplessly. "I already told Naoi I don't want to ruin the trip."

"You're not doing her any favors by disappearing all the time," she remarked. Turning to Ayato, she said, "I'm going to go get changed. When I come back, let's get some cocoa before dinner, alright?"

Ayato nodded, watching her go. Only realizing at the last second that she'd left him alone with Hejjiguchi. What was he supposed to do with him? Offer unsolicited opinions? Provide sympathy? He made a face as she disappeared around a corner.

"Can I ask you something?" Hejjiguchi spoke up, startling Ayato into turning back to him.

Not really finding it within him to shut it down with a dry "no," he sighed and made a vague gesture at him. "Go ahead."

Hejjiguchi was silent for a moment, then sank down on the edge of the cushioned bench by the fire.

"Your brother," he said. "You grew up with him, right?"

On the surface, it sounded like a stupid question. But Ayato had a feeling there was going to be a lot more to this conversation, so he moved to sit down in one of the chairs.

"I guess," Ayato said. "Up until we were ten, at least."

"But I mean, you were twins, together from the start," Hejjiguchi pointed out. "Weren't the two of you close? I know you don't talk about him much, but… I dunno, I wasn't sure if that was because it hurt to miss him or something."

"After our father decided we were old enough to train in pottery, a lot of our childhood was 'all work and no play,'" said Ayato, sinking in his seat and trying to get comfy. "But yes, there were some good memories. Though even outside of pottery, it was always a competition with him. He was always reminding me he was the older and wiser twin – just because he had a few minutes on me." (Hearing this, Hejjiguchi gave a sympathetic laugh.) "But he was fun, I'll give him that." Ayato shrugged. "It's like I told Yuri once. He was my first best friend, and my first rival."

Hejjiguchi nodded thoughtfully, twisting at his lips for a moment. "Do you think…" he said, then hesitated before beginning again. "Do you think you'd rather have known him from the start, like in the formative years of your life, and lost him when you did… or meet him for the first time when you're a teen and you've both lived separate lives, so you now have a brother for the rest of your life but he'll always be a stranger to you?"

Hardly any of that registered with Ayato; he wrinkled his brow in bewilderment. "…Wait, what?"

"Uh…" Hejjiguchi closed his eyes, grimacing. Possibly aware he made no sense. "Would you rather have known and grown up with your brother, so you actually had a brotherly relationship with him up until his death, or have him still be alive but you haven't known him at all up until today so it's much harder to form that bond, and… I dunno…"

"I think I'd rather have the one with the living brother?" Ayato said, still a bit confounded. "If we're long-lost twins, why would it matter how long it takes us to meet, as long as we get to have more than ten years together? It's never too late to form that connection. We'd probably still have things in common." Still confused, he looked over at Hejjiguchi. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason," he said, averting his eyes.

Unsatisfied, Ayato gave a slight scoff. "I don't see how this has anything to do with Kurimu…" A sudden, disturbing epiphany took over him. "Unless… please tell me you two didn't find out you're related somehow…!"

"No! No, no," Hejjiguchi assured him, looking back up and shaking his head with a mix of alarm and humor. "But believe me, you're right to worry. Given my dad's history."

"What do you mean?" Ayato asked, curious despite himself.

Hejjiguchi's humor faded somewhat, his eyes darting away again. "Do you think he's right?" he asked. "Nezumi. Am I being a jerk about this… this thing with Kurimu and Ami?"

Couldn't he keep his thoughts on one thing at a time? "You're being stupid," Ayato offered.

Hejjiguchi gave a wan smile, coupled with a weak chuckle. "Yeah, but you always think I'm being stupid."

"Exactly," Ayato replied. "I'm unsurprised. And I'm trying to stay out of it."

A sigh from Hejjiguchi, long and deep. "Well, it runs in the family, I guess," he admitted. "Being stupid about relationships. Like, my mom and dad, you know, they married young. And I guess that's not always the problem, but they were just… always fighting. I know it bugs you how loud I listen to music sometimes – that's just a habit from back then. They'd be yelling at each other and I'd have to put on my headphones and crank up the volume to drown them out."

Ayato blinked in surprise. Lighthearted, goofy Hejjiguchi had that kind of home environment? He never would've suspected…

"That's going to kill your eardrums one day," he warned, to which Hejjiguchi gave an uncaring scoff. "But I get it." Then he furrowed his eyebrows at him. "Your mother actually yelled back?"

"Oh, yeah! Louder than he did," Hejjiguchi said matter-of-factly, his own brows shooting up his forehead. "My mom… had a lot of highs and lows. I grew up watching her become more and more unhappy with my dad. Like, if she wasn't sleeping or painting or trying to take care of me, she was arguing with him. That's most of my memories of her. Sleeping, painting, arguing." His eyes turned distant, faraway in a memory, as he leaned back against the wooden frame. "But she wasn't the problem. Not the only one."

Had? Wasn't? Ayato frowned as the words started standing out to him more. "I can't help but notice you're using past tense," he said cautiously.

"Yeah, well…" Hejjiguchi crossed one leg over another, swinging his foot a little. "Let's just say she was right to feel insecure. She was right to be suspicious." He flung out his arms in a shrug. "I mean, she wasn't even my dad's first love, you know? Up until the end of his second year, he had a high school sweetheart named Erena. They were best friends, like me and Kurimu. Thick as thieves. My mom had a crush on him from the moment she moved to Akuma in second year, but she didn't talk to him until they were away at the same college together because she was convinced he and Erena would start going out again. That, and she was really intimidated by her. Think… Ami or Kurimu going up against Yuri."

"They wouldn't stand a chance," Ayato said automatically, shaking his head. Maybe Ami was strong with her tackle hugs and her firm grip, but he could easily imagine Yuri flipping her to the ground by the arm. It was such a vivid, impressive mental picture that he felt some concern for the girl, in any hypothetical future fights she and Yuri might have.

Hejjiguchi chuckled, no doubt thinking about it as well. "So, anyway, when I was thirteen, the fighting got even worse," he said, turning sideways and kicking his legs up on the cushioned bench. "'Cause it turns out, Mom found out from one of her friends that Erena had a son my age who looked a lot like my dad in the face."

Ayato's eyes grew a fraction wider, and he straightened up in his chair with interest.

"My dad had no idea he even existed, but he had to fess up that a year before I was born, the time he ditched Mom for a few days after fighting with her on Christmas, he went to a holiday party in Akuma and hooked up with Erena. She didn't know he was married at the time and he didn't tell her." For a moment, Hejjiguchi's features scrunched up in distaste and disbelief, shaking his head as if he still couldn't make sense of it. "She found out when she finally looked him up to let him know about the kid, but by that time, he and my mom were already expecting me, sooo…." He sucked in a sarcastic breath through his teeth.

"What's… what's the age difference there?" Ayato asked curiously.

"He's two months older," said Hejjiguchi, and he gave a weak laugh. "He calls me the guilt baby."

"Well, he's a bastard, so…" Ayato shrugged.

Hejjiguchi's laughter grew louder – appreciative and more genuine. "You're telling me!" he said, grinning from ear to ear.

Ayato felt obnoxiously proud at having cheered him up. Like his mother, he seemed to have strong highs and lows. And as grating as his highs could be sometimes, they suited him a lot better than his lows.

And yet, he had to ask. "But what about your mom? What happened to her?"

"She left," Hejjiguchi said immediately, like it was right at the front of his mind and yet it was no big deal. "Divorced my dad and packed her bags. Left a note claiming I looked too much like my dad and my brother, and just kinda took off somewhere. I don't know where she is now." He crossed one leg over the other. "But that summer, Dad took me to meet the Nezumis, and we moved to Akuma the next spring to live closer to them. And as of lastJanuary, Erena is now my stepmom."

Ayato gawked at him. "Nezumi? Nezumi is your brother?"

"Half-brother," Hejjiguchi corrected. "And stepbrother. Important qualifiers."

"I can't believe I never figured it out," Ayato said, more to himself.

"Don't worry, it's not a matter of you not paying attention," said Hejjiguchi. "I just don't really talk about it much. We've never really acknowledged each other as actual siblings."

Ayato frowned, thinking back over their interactions over the past few days. The kicking on the bus, the protesting over sharing a room, the merciless dares… You sure do act like brothers. The comment was waiting in his mouth, ready to burst, but he swallowed it back down. Somehow that didn't feel like the right thing to say.

"I'm sorry about that," he said honestly. "And your mom, too. For leaving like she did."

"Thanks." Hejjiguchi exhaled slowly, puffing his bangs from his eyes. "I mean, I don't blame her. For the note, yeah, she could've at least said a better goodbye, but… but I don't blame her for leaving him. Or even me. She was already miserable before she found out he was a cheater. And, just… I dunno. To have to look at someone every day when their face is a constant reminder of something painful..."

The words squeezed uncomfortably at Ayato's chest as he thought of his own mother. The way she slipped up on his name, the way she looked at him so sadly sometimes. But six and a half years later, she was still here. What was the difference between his mother and Hejjiguchi's?

For a terrible moment, Ayato almost wished Kimito had a mistress too, if only so that it would be the final straw for his mother. Assuming that would even do the trick.

"She left because your dad made her miserable," he said. "Not you."

Hejjiguchi uncrossed his legs and swung them back around on the bench, facing forward. "But like, she's right, you know?" he said, gesturing at himself. "I turned out to be even more like him than she thought. Lying and betraying one girl I care about while putting the other in an awkward position. Nezumi called me a real player, and it just… it feels dirty. Like – being a free spirit is one thing, but it's another thing to hurt people with what you're doing. I can tell Masuda's getting really frustrated with me." Then he waved a hand over at Ayato. "And you – I mean, you just kind of treat it like it's a stinky diaper you're holding at arm's length. You know, like our friendship."

Ayato couldn't help himself; he started cracking up. "That's exactly what it is!" he managed between snickers. Catching a subtle shift in Hejjiguchi's expression, he quickly amended, "The secret, that is. Not our…" He trailed off, uncertain.

Hejjiguchi lifted his eyebrows at him in surprise. "No?" he questioned, starting to laugh. "You can't even say it! Though I guess that is on brand for you, refusing to admit how you really feel about people."

"What are you talking about—"

"Hey, you're not the only one," Hejjiguchi said with a shrug. "It's hard, you know. To be sure about someone. Like, how do you let yourself get that close to anybody when you know how bad things can get?"

Ayato considered, then gave a little harrumph. "Is that why you call your stepbrother by his mom's maiden name?"

Hejjiguchi blinked. "Well, he didn't take our dad's last name after our parents got married."

"If he did, would you call him Hejjiguchi then?" Ayato scoffed, piquing a brow at him. "Or maybe that would be too confusing, so you'd have to call him by his first name. But how then would you distance yourself from him? I assume he lives in the same house…"

Squinting, Hejjiguchi waggled a finger at him. "You know, I feel like you're trying to get at something—"

"You're keeping him at arm's length so he never feels like your actual brother," Ayato observed. "You think this marriage is just another relationship doomed to fail. This way it's not as big of a loss, if there's no family to fall apart."

There was a pause, as Hejjiguchi's features scrunched in contemplation. Briefly he gave an affected eyebrow raise and a slow nod, as if conceding that it was a good point. But then he chewed on his mouth a little.

"I really do sound like a pessimist right now, don't I?" he said, and shook his head. "They're good together, him and Erena. They don't fight like he and my mom did. But you can't blame me for being a little skeptical. He loved them both but he cheated on my mom and he treated Erena like a one-night stand." His leg started bouncing restlessly. "I mean, she was his best friend, right? Like, at one point? And my mom was his wife. And yet he lied to her and he reduced his first love to nothing but a dirty little secret."

He rubbed his hands on his knees, settling his legs. Ayato was quietly relieved.

"And I just remember thinking when I found out about it… why couldn't he just tell her the truth? You know, man up and face the consequences before she found out the hard way?" Hejjiguchi said with a sigh, which turned into a groan as he massaged his temples. "Do you know how annoying it was to hear those exact words just now from Nezumi?"

"That's very good brotherly advice, actually," Ayato said seriously. "Did he say whether you were supposed to do it before or after you pushed her down a hill?"

Hejjiguchi gaped at him in shock, before promptly bursting into laughter. "He's so stupid!"

Ayato joined in, wheezing, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. "Did – did he say which one you're supposed to push?"

"I don't know, man! The one I'm practically in love with or the one lovin' on Masuda lately?" Hejjiguchi cackled, grinning from ear to ear. "'Cause in my case they're not the same—"

He faltered, then, looking astonished at himself. It was quite plain that he had not expected to say that. Nor had he considered its implications before. He looked over at Ayato, who inclined his head with a half-smirk, confirming that he had heard it too.

"Hey, guys!" said Yuri, coming up to the central open fire from the side. Hejjiguchi jumped, unsettled. "What were you two laughing about just now?"

"Oh, Hejjiguchi here thinks it's funny to push innocent girls down a slope," Ayato said, trying to compose himself and wrangle his smirk into an expression of firm disapproval. Then he did a double-take and took a moment to admire her outfit – a well-fitted green long-sleeve shirt, covered halfway up by a thick black belt, and a black skirt and leggings to match. As he looked her up and down, his thoughts briefly warred between is she dressed warm enough and shut up, she can wear whatever she wants – including more of this.

"I don't believe that for a second," Yuri said, crossing her arms under her chest. Ayato swallowed and averted his gaze to the fire. "Is he messing with me?"

"He'd like to," Hejjiguchi said.

Red-faced, wide-eyed, and glaring, Ayato reached behind his back and tossed a pillow at him. "Hey!"

"Don't be gross!" Yuri hollered, swatting at his head after he dodged it with a laugh.

"You two are so cute when you attack me together," he said lovingly.

"Whatever." Yuri gave him a suspicious look, her cheeks still flushed, but it died down after a moment. "We were going to get cocoa. Want anything?"

"Nah, I'm good." Hejjiguchi waved them off with a wink. "You two kids have fun."

With that, he trotted up the platform steps and headed for the door. They watched him go, and then Yuri turned and motioned with her head for Ayato to follow. "You coming?"

Ayato nodded, falling into step behind her and watching as she strode toward the drink bar with a determined swing of her hips.

He really could use that cocoa, actually. His mouth was feeling a little dry for some reason.

Preview:

"I told you it works!"

"What, am I supposed to yodel or something?"

"This band saves lives…"

"I'm not really that good."

"I'll do it."

"I guess we'll find out."

"It's all I'm going to talk about—"

"SOUMA HEJJIGUCHI! Front and center!"

[Chapter 45]: Karaoke Night.