The last thing Draco wanted was to spend Friday night crossing the Forbidden Forest in the presence of Fantastic-Potter and Granger. At least he had Theo's company that had been joined with Harry for this assignment. It started to rain softly but enough to deeply irritate Draco. He had to finish his mission, which was nowhere near complete. It was all fucked up and here he was, hunting down a centaur's tears and following in the footsteps of the Chosen One and brilliant Fucking Granger. How he wanted to get out of this miserable school, leave it all behind, everything he knew. Never again have to put up with Granger's irritating mania such as her irritating habit of moving her lips as she reads silently; or her disorganization with the papers splashed by the table, real chaos for such a tiny person; or the fact that she barely touches her breakfast because she is too busy reading or doing her homework or serving as moral and emotional support for her ignorant and incompetent best friends. Anyway, he wanted to get away from it all.
"Hey Drake, Pansy wants to organize a small party next weekend." Theo said walking side by side with him.
"Only Slytherin?" he asked. "Please say yes."
"I think she wants diversity." Theo said laughing.
"She wants to fuck someone new or make a fool of someone." Draco said annoyed.
"Yea, you know. Everyone is doing their best to pass time." Theo said almost in a whisper. "To get through I guess."
"What are you doing then?" Draco asked curiously keeping an eye on Granger and Harry who were absorbed in their little private conversation. Pathetic.
"Just being with someone you know, kill the loneliness. Keep the madness inside. It's nice to talk to someone about… stuff, or whatever."
"I supposed."
"And you, what are you doing?"
Draco kept looking at Hermione. Something so fucking stupid. "Well, hunting centaur tears apparently." They both laughed like the old times, for some seconds, and then they were sucked to reality.
After half an hour of walking through the darkness and density of the forest, Draco's senses were growing clearer and alert. His legs began to shiver, and he felt himself growing colder and colder. He knew what was happening. The mark on his arm burned her skin and intense pain ran through his veins. This was His warning or His arrival, however, Draco's body was giving up little by little, but he kept walking, not catching the attention of anyone, not even his friend, who was his side, completely absorbed in their thoughts and the depressed ambient between them.
Maybe Draco had managed to spend the rest of the night unnoticed if Hermione had not caught abruptly in the middle of the way, and during screaming, she stepped back and stopped in the middle of his arms. He froze with her warm touch.
"What the fuck is going on?" Theo said excitedly.
In front of the group was a centaur on his deathbed, moaning in pain and blue blood sprouting from his mouth, chest, and stomach. The path was soaked with its bright blood and a horrifying, metallic scent hung over the air. He smelled death, suffering, and despair. Harry hurried to rescue the animal dying, removing his wand, and casting some spells that would heal him. Draco knew this smell perfectly, it was the new scent of his house, it was the smell of innocent death kills on his dining table, his living room floor, his bedroom bed.
He closed his eyes briefly, holding back the vomit that came to his mouth. He needed to get out of there, but if he ran out, he would make Potter suspicious, even more than he already was. The brand was still burning, and it felt hot and cold at the same time, his heart was pounding against his chest and he thought he might faint right there. He needed something, an escape. Unconsciously, he touched both sides of Hermione's arms, which remained quite close to him after having walked back a few steps. She was trembling slightly with the situation in front of her, but if she felt Draco's touch, she said nothing and stayed still, close to him.
Amidst the strong odor of death, Draco tried to focus on the perfume of Hermione that was quite strong. She smelled like vanilla and something exotic, maybe roses and a patch of rain. After a few seconds, he felt her body relax, though he could still hear the small sobs he let go from time to time.
"Harry ... there is no point." She sighed as she looked her best friend in the eye. Harry was stunned, paralyzed in time and space. This was his first contact with death since Sirius died. The agony sounds of the poor animal felt like knives stuck in his heart, which made him remember everything. Harry continued to shift his gaze between the centaur and Hermione, who somehow knew what Harry was feeling and shared with him his pain and loss.
"I'm so sorry. So sorry." Harry repeated softly, mostly to himself, lowering to where the animal lay.
No one was indifferent to the agony and suffering of this animal. They were stuck in this kind of trance when watching a fantastic animal dying in front of them and the world was oblivious to what was happening there, with them. But deep down, seeing death so close, reminded them of the coming war or of those who they have already lost. It reminded them of the fear and despair that was palpable in the air when they returned this year to Hogwarts. It reminded them of the secrets and murmurs in the corridors, the threats of Voldemort's arrival, the deaths of Muggle towns, and entire families swipe from the earth because of hate. It reminded them of the burden they carried and from which they could not escape. Everything became clear at that moment, everything they tried to ignore over the past weeks or months, by studying and working like crazy; or screwing around just to numb the fear; or obsessed over something to try to fix this; or just stopped eating, sleeping, living reality.
"We need to do something." Draco said softly.
" I will do it." Hermione said, stepping forward.
A part of Draco did not want her to go, the closeness between them and the light touch on Hermione's arms was what Draco was keeping from having an attack any minute.
"Hermione, you do not have to." said Harry, touching her on the shoulder. Hermione lowered herself slowly to the animal dying and pulled out her wand. The animal nodded softly, and Hermione's eyes filled with tears. She tried one last time to save the poor animal and put her trembling hands in the body of the centaur, trying to remove the suffering. A wave of pain and agony struck her body, all hope vanished from her and for a moment, she thought she was really going to die. No light at the end of the tunnel. Nothing was comfortable.
"Hermione, stop! You're bleeding!" Harry screamed and pulled her out of that trance. Her head ached, and she could not get up off the floor. She felt the blood flowing from her nose to her white blouse.
Draco withdrew his wand and cast the Avada Kedavra's curse, ending the suffering of the poor animal, who looked into his eyes with a suspicious and understanding look. Hermione let out a small cry and grabbed her head that was exploding.
"Fuck. It hurts." she said desperately. Harry tried to stop the blood from flowing from his nose but in vain. He looked terrified and Hermione noticed how small he truly was. Just a boy, really.
"Shit. What are we going to do?" Theo asked trying to keep his calm and failing.
"Potter, help me grab her." Draco told Harry as he tried to lift her off the floor. Face to face, he took Hermione's hands that gripped her head and placed his hands on her delicate face removing all the pain the centaur had given her. His body felt warm, too warm with the amount of magic that was running through her veins, and he almost managed to forget the burning of his dark mark, which seemed to hurt more and more as Draco looked into Hermione's eyes or touched her. The color returned to Hermione's face and the pain slowly faded away from the young witch.
"Are you okay man?" Theo asked Draco as he finished the healing spell. After all, Snape's private lessons were good for something, other than healing wounds and intense bleeds caused by the Dark Lord to his family. He felt the ancient magic running through his veins, but there was something different this time. He already performed this kind of spell once on his father after a little dispute with Voldemort. Sure he felt the pain he was channeling as his own, but this time, he felt something else. If he focused he could feel Granger's magic flowing through him, even now. There was something foreign and powerful fighting his way out out of him. Demanding to get out, to be seen, or to be absorbed.
"Yes. Just dizzy." He said dropping his hands from Hermione's small face. She looked at him, startled, with eyes wide open. He nodded to her, like a silent agreement between them: you welcome, but don't mention it to anyone.
"What did you do?" Harry asked, suspiciously. "That spell doesn't work in humans."
"I guess I'm that good, Potter." Draco said sarcastically.
"Look. A tear." Theo said pointing at the centaur who lay there. The group exchanged a guilty look, Harry took the vial and kept the tears that continued to come out of the poor animal's open eyes. When they had enough, he closed his eyes to rest in peace. Draco wanted to vomit.
"We should bury him." Hermione said, weakly, grabbing Harry's arm for support. Draco wondered if she was feeling his magic flowing through her too. He thought she was because she kept looking at him suspiciously and unsure of herself.
"Yes." Harry agreed. "But no magic. Theo, help me with this." Hermione let go of Harry's arm and hold on to a tree. The world was turning around her and something hot was flowing through her. Almost screaming inside of her, in a violent and intense manner.
Harry and Theodisappeared into the woods, taking the heavy centaur's body to a flat spot. Hermione and Draco were completely alone in the deep silence of the forest, with only the torch lights stuck on the blood-spattered floor. The echoes of the animals and other magical creatures only made them feel more isolated.
"Thank you for saving my life." Hermione said shyly, looking down at the floor.
"I could not let you die in pain, even if you think I'm a monster." said Draco.
"I never thought you were a monster." Hermione confessed, embarrassed by all this conversation. She must prefer bickering with him about anything.
"Good." Draco merely said. He never wanted Fucking-Potter to show up so much as he did now.
"How did you do it?" She asked. She had to.
"You're not the only one with brains in this school, Granger. I know that shooks you by the kind of people that surrounds you." Draco said. He was pushing her and she was not in the mood for it, he knew it. But he had to know if she was feeling any of the magic stings he was feeling.
"For a moment I forgot you are truly an asshole. Nevermind my question." She just said, angrily. She did not where that anger was coming from. This was Malfoy. It was not like she expected a truthful answer from him. Then why she was feeling so angry over this?
Suddenly they heard a noise and several voices that could not be Harry's and Theo's. Draco felt a sharp pain emanating from his mark and panicked. It's them. He knew they were doing missions to the school grounds, making a sort of map to the future attack. The forest was a perfect place to hide, or to collect allies.
He looked at Hermione and his panic increased. He knew what they would do if they found her. A wave of nausea and fear rushed through his body and without a second thought he gripped Hermione's hand and ran out, ignoring the resistance and the protests of an angry and weak Hermione.
"Malfoy? What the fuck?" she yelled.
It took all of Draco's effort and strength to reach the end of the forest and see Hagrid's cabin. The mark had stopped burning. Finally, they were safe. They? He immediately unclenched Hermione's hand, as if it were burning him.
"Hey! Harry's back there, how are they supposed to know we're back?" Hermione stormed.
"I don't care. Deal with it." said Draco, walking away.
"What the fuck! Malfoy, what's your problem?" Hermione said, walking too fast, which made her head spin. "Can you fucking wait?"
He hated himself right now. He wanted to do something stupid, impulsive. Shout or hit something. Get out of his mind. He did not recognize himself at this moment, nor could he understand where this worry came from the stupid know-it-all Granger, the girl he hated most in the whole school, and whom he apparently could not get away from all night. Everything seemed wrong, he might have gone mad at last.
"Draco?" Hermione said slowly approaching, as if he were a wounded animal, waiting to be comforted. He wondered how disturbed he must look at the moment for her to call him Draco.
His eyes widened in amazement. His name sounded so strange out of her mouth. From her lips. Sounded wrong but also comforting, in a natural way. Hermione's scent swiftly invaded him again and he could not think again. Why her smell was so intoxicating and present all the time? He couldn't help the urge that begged him to be closer to her, that was pulling him to her.
"Look." He said, trying to collect his thoughts. "I heard something, I thought we were in danger and clearly you can hardly walk so I had to bring you with me. It was this or had to justify why I let my classmate die in the middle of a forest on a Friday night. " Draco said so fast, unconscious that he was screaming at her.
"Fine. Just go on then. "Hermione yelled back. "I will stay here."
"Fine!" Draco shouted again.
"Fine!". Hermione yelled back, letting all that hot anger that was boiling inside her. It feels nice, just for once, to shout it out.
At that moment, they were closer than they wished, mere meters away and panting with the shouting, tired of this night that seemed not to end. Hermione's face was still contorted with pain, a remnant of the pain of the centaur. Draco felt he was losing control over his life, his emotions, his behaviors. Something that is not like him, since he spent his life pretending not to feel, to behave in the right way, to show nothing of truth, and at this moment, it seemed that everything was ruined because of that damned centaur. No, because of Voldemort, who was always present, behind his head breathing, reminding him through intense and sporadic pains throughout the day that came from his mark. Just like now as he looked desperately at Hermione, who looked as confused and tired as he.
"Are you okay?" Hermione asked, for some motive that it was beyond her reason. How could she not worry about the boy who saved her life and who is in obvious suffering? But even so, even if this was her Gryfindor morals talking out loud, why can't she just back away from him?
"'I'm fine. Just leave me be. "Draco said ignoring her and walking away to the castle.
Her head screamed to say nothing, to just let him go away, solve his problems alone, just as he wanted, but there was a part of Hermione who wanted to help what Malfoy was dealing it. As much as she hated to admit it was difficult to separate the hateful and arrogant boy she had always known, who had bullied her years, from the person she had come to know him for the past week. Something clearly troubled him, and he was not the same hateful boy, his behavior change, he was quieter but also mature. And she could not let go of the fact that he was someone who saved her life when he was not obliged to do so, who took away all the suffering and pain that she was feeling when Hermione knew that he was already in pain. She felt his cold hands in her arms, and his breathing quickened when he touched her. Something was going on with him and Hermione needed to solve it.
"Dumbledore can help you, you know." She said softly, and Draco stopped refusing to face Hermione. "He's reliable. Whatever it is, it does not have to be this way."
He did not know what to do. How could she know he was a death eater? Did Potter know too? They knew and everything was at risk.
"I don't know what you're talking about, but you better go to the infirmary. Clearly, that centaur has fucked up your head, more than already is." He said dismissing her and leaving without looking back.