DISCLAIMER: I base my stories on Intellectual Property (IP) owned by BioWare™ and EA™. This chapter contains dialogue from Dragon Age Origins: Awakening

SPOILERS: I incorporate events from the games, the novels and the comics. If you have not played or read, please beware.

A SONG IN THE STILLNESS

Chapter 3: Better This Way

9:31 Dragon, Solace === Soldier's Peak

Alistair, known as Ser Alun to everyone at Soldier's Peak, dismissed the wardens and warden recruits from the sparring ground and headed to his apartment in the keep. Since Alistair and Zevran had arrived at the Peak, Liam had sent a few recruits each month, selecting the best warriors and light fighters from the many who wanted to join the now famous group of Blight Fighters. Alistair had snorted when he learned how many volunteered for the wardens after the Blight ended, recalling how few recruits Duncan could find before. Liam had no need to scour jails or the poorest corners of a city for recruits. The men Liam sent, and most were men, had the martial skills and determination to return the 'spawn to their lairs and keep them there. All the new recruits had lost family, friends or occupations to Urthemiel and his Hordes. Liam only accepted those who had nothing left but their skills and their intelligence; the others he sent back to their families, farms and businesses, telling them to rebuild.

While they sent recruits, neither Liam nor Anders visited the Peak after the Orlesian wardens' appearance, worrying that they would be followed, revealing the exact location and condition of the supposedlyruined fortress. To any inquiries, the wardens had admitted the existence of the old warden fort, saying it lay somewhere in the high mountains near Highever's border with Amaranthine and playing down its importance, saying it had been slighted – destroyed by King Arlen after its capture. They claimed it offered little to the wardens today beyond a training site. Only the three Regents, Loghain, as General, and Teagan, Alfstanna and Nathaniel knew the Peak had not been destroyed by King Arlen and still stood.

Alistair, before the battle, and then Liam afterwards, had persuaded the Regents to let the wardens repair and use the great fortress, which stood on Highever lands, while keeping its condition secret. Both Warden-Commanders assured the Regents that it would not be used against Ferelden or revealed to any foreign wardens, except those from Nevarra. They expressed the hope that, in return, the secret would also be kept from Fereldans. The wardens proposed running the Peak and the lands surrounding it, primarily mines, as a bann might manage a bannorn. Levi and his family would conduct trade and re-open some of the mines to create income. The wardens would hunt and fell lumber for sale and for the keep's use.

The Regents had agreed, but only if they formalized the arrangement and made the Warden-Commander the Bann of the territory, with Fergus as the Bann's lord. To hide its true status, they agreed to call it the Bann of Warden's Hill and describe it as a simple fort, set in the midst of ancient mining sites, which the wardens would explore and make safe. Fergus required a tax of a sovereign a year, payable on 26 Solace, when he would make an annual visit to the fortress. It's Warden-Commander Alistair's birthday, he had explained. Without his sacrifice, none of this would matter. As far as the Landsmeet would know, making the Warden-Commander a Bann made him responsible for a small parcel of land which provided a barracks and training ground for the wardens under Highever's oversight. The Regents believed the Landsmeet would accept this arrangement.

The agreement, creating the Bann of Warden's Hill, had occurred while Alistair recovered in the warden compound where only Liam, Anders, Morrigan and, later, Zevran knew of his survival. Once he could leave his bed, he had rummaged through the belongings Zevran had brought to his room, searching for the pills Lys had given him. Was it only a year ago, he had wondered? He had taken one each day to retard the taint's advance for most of that time; looking at the full pouch, replenished when they had passed through Highever, he considered taking the larger dose and ridding himself of the taint forever. He had smiled, remembering that Zev had agreed it would improve his disguise were he taintless.

Before he left Denerim, he had taken the larger dose for three weeks. Each day, he had felt the taint receding, the tingle in his blood becoming less when Liam or Anders joined him, but never quite disappearing. Both Liam and Anders had confirmed that they could no longer sense him after two weeks passed, but he could still sense them. Apparently, the taint, even when gone, left some residue which allowed him to sense it in others. It unnerved him to still have the taint sense, but Zevran had assured him it was a good skill to have, even if he had to mask it.

With Alistair's arrival at Soldier's Peak in Bloomingtide, the Drydens continued making improvements to the great keep, while he added a training regimen for the warden recruits Liam sent, thereby making part of the claims about the Peak true. He refined the design for the armory, sparring ground, and archery butts, as well as, reviewing Levi's plans and making suggestions for the barracks. To alleviate boredom, both his own and the recruits, he led them out to search for darkspawn in the old mines. They eradicated any darkspawn they found, sealed passages and, in the ones deemed safe, the Drydens opened new mining operations.

In the forests near Drydenton, Levi's family harvested lumber for building, cutting the trees into planks in the village mill and transporting them through the tunnels to the fortress. Other Drydens remained in Drydenton to manage the charcoal kilns and the coppice which grew the trees they burned. Levi's scouts maintained an outpost in the old village, where guides met visitors and recruits for the trek through the tunnels. The Warden's Rest continued to serve travelers on the forest track which paralleled the North Road, regardless of destination. Scouts and wardens patrolled the approaches to the tunnels, sending the uninvited back to track or the North Road, itself.

First Alistair, and now Liam, insisted that Soldier's Peak must support itself. Ferelden needed to rebuild, not support the wardens, no matter what service they provided. That meant generating income to buy food and supplies they could not provide for themselves. As summer turned into autumn, the wardens, recruits and Drydens formed a close-knit unit bent on keeping Soldier's Peak safe and well supplied. Levi's family provided labor, goods, food, and a cut of their profits in return for a safe place to live and work. So far, the arrangement had proven mutually beneficial.

Focusing on training the new wardens and recruits had taken Alistair's mind off himself, so Liam, unsurprisingly, had been right telling him to keep busy. Zevran helped too. They shared an apartment, each with their own small bedroom adjoining the common room. Just finding Zev lounging before the small hearth or sharpening his blades when he returned from training made Alistair almost feel at home. It was not the life he had hoped for, but it would do for now.

Late in August a bird arrived with a letter telling Alistair of the attack on the Vigil and incursions elsewhere. In the letter, Liam also reported a possible darkspawn sighting in the Knotwood Hills, not far from Soldier's Peak. From the Peak, Liam explained, Alistair and his patrol could reach an old mine more quickly than any other wardens. Alistair could hear Liam's sarcasm across the miles, when the Warden-Commander proposed patrolling the hills south of the Peak as a cure for Alistair's complaints about boredom. Alistair had chuckled, but the brief amusement had passed and the melancholy he had been fighting returned, as he wished Liam was addressing him in person, not from Denerim. As much as he valued Zevran's company, it did not replace the camaraderie of his other Blight Companions, much less the ache he still felt even when he was not thinking about Lys.

9:31 Dragon, Kingsway === Kal'Hirol

Alistair and Zevran had made it a point to learn the route through the tunnels so, even without the Drydens' help, Alistair led the Knotwood Hills patrol to the outside quickly. Zevran had, reluctantly, remained at the Peak at Alistair's insistence. Despite the supply of Blight pills, Alistair argued that Zev had exposed himself to enough 'spawn and he left the elf to supervise the completion of the armory, apothecary and herb garden. While not a gardener, Zev knew potions and poisons and which plants should be cultivated, while one of Levi's cousins knew how and where to plant. Now, emerging onto the track leading to Drydenton, Alistair felt very alone, despite the six new wardens and two warden recruits surrounding him. He sighed and led the seven fighters and one mage towards the inn, at Drydenton, where they would spend the night, before moving on to investigate the darkspawn incursion.

After leaving Drydenton the next morning, no one sensed darkspawn until the wardens had traveled into the second range of the Knotwood Hills, well south of the North Road. As they walked, the terrain grew dryer and the vegetation more sparse, hamlets and farmholds dwindled, and even evidence of sheep herding, in the form of droppings, disappeared. One warden noted the hawks floating high above them and observed that they might set snares for smaller animals once they camped. Wiping the sweat from his brow, Alistair tied a rag around his head to stop the perspiration from dripping into his eyes, and agreed fresh rabbit or the like, roasting on a spit that night, would be welcome. He took a sip from his water skin. Glad it's Kingsway. Justinian would be unbearable. Fortunately, water, in the form of small, sluggish streams and the occasional spring, appeared in their path several times, allowing them to keep their water skins full.

Alistair felt the gentle tug of darkspawn during the morning of the third day. From the top of a ridge, they saw the cleft in the earth Liam's message had described. Descending towards the old mine works, they halted periodically at Alistair's signal to look for evidence of darkspawn patrols. As they got closer, Alistair raised his hand, again halting the six wardens and two recruits. He turned and asked the wardens what they felt, not wanting to divulge his own latent sensing ability to those who believed he was not a warden. His wardens, new to the taint and unsure of their sensing, looked at one another to confirm what they felt. The mage, Adeliza, spoke first, telling Alistair she sensed taint and the others agreed, but finding no other evidence of darkspawn above ground, they used the abandoned mine's rickety wooden platforms and stairways to descend into its depths, the pull of taint growing stronger as they moved. Suddenly the sounds of battle rose.

"Darkspawn," one of the new wardens shouted.

Alistair halted his troop again. "Don't rush in," he ordered. "Let's see what's happening and how many there are." He smiled at the mage from the Collective, whom Liam had rescued from under the nose of the Chantry. Adeliza had herbal skills and a bit of healing, but her primal spells outdid Morrigan. "Adeliza, stay back and cast, don't get in the middle of the fight."

"And don't freeze us," another warden muttered.

"I did that once! And anyway, I've learned," the mage replied. "I'll only burn you, not freeze you."

Alistair chuckled. "That's reassuring, but, please, freeze me if you set me on fire."

The troops laughed nervously. "Yes, please put us out!" they chorused.

"Now, let's go slowly, keep your eyes on me, and follow my orders."

"Ser," they said.

The group moved carefully forward, watching the opening at the end of the passage.

"Doesn't sound like too many," one of the warden recruits whispered. As he spoke a group of darkspawn loped past, dragging a struggling dwarf behind them.

Alistair yelled, "Attack!"

The wardens rushed forward engaging the darkspawn. Several hurlocks fell under warden blades, a few ran, and the dwarf managed to pull free and join the fight.

"A timely arrival." she said, as the last hurlock collapsed. "You're wardens?"

"We are," Alistair said. "Well, not me, but most of us. We received reports of darkspawn in this area. Accurate ones, apparently."

"Too accurate," the dwarf replied. "The thaig below here, Kal'Hirol…it's crawling with them."

He looked at her armor. "You're Legion? I'm Alun, by the way."

"Sigrun, and yes my battalion came here through the Deep Roads to investigate the old thaig, perhaps to reclaim it, but I may be the only one left." She stopped. "How do you know about the Legion?"

"I knew the wardens who visited Orzammar just before the Blight. Heard their stories. I fought the Blight here," Alistair said, using a variation of the speech he had made up to explain his experience.

The dwarf squinted, looking down, away from the light that penetrated the canyon like sides of the mine. "I ran to the surface to escape the attack. The others, the darkspawn overwhelmed them." She looked back to the cave behind her. "I should have stayed."

"Nothing wrong with living to fight another day, Sigrun," one of the new wardens said.

"Nothing wrong with dying fighting the 'spawn either." She shaded her eyes, looking up into the sliver of blue sky above the cleft.

"First time on the surface?"

Sigrun nodded. "I'm going back. Are you-"

"We're heading down into the thaig. Do you want to join us?"

"I do. The darkspawn down there…they're odd. My commander believed they had breeders down there. They need to die."

"Broodmothers?"

Sigrun's eyes narrowed. "You know what they are? Most cloudheads don't."

"I know." Alistair's lips pressed together in a grim line. "We need to end them."

x==========x

Adeliza cast a final healing spell on one of the new recruits whose name she could not recall. The other wardens sat silently around a small fire on the ridge above the cleft. Both recruits had vials of darkspawn blood and more fighting experience against darkspawn than many wardens accumulated in a lifetime. Adeliza passed out the pills Alistair had provided to the two recruits and the dwarf.

Sigrun had returned to the surface with the wardens after a week spent in the thaig, where they saw opposing groups of darkspawn fighting each other. More troubling, some of the darkspawn spoke. Alistair had let the darkspawn fight, leaving only the victorious 'spawn for the wardens to defeat, and had brushed off comments from his troop about the talking hurlocks. They had seen the ghosts of dwarves, smith caste and others, who had once defended their Thaig against earlier darkspawn incursions with no help from warrior caste armies until they were overcome. Alistair used the excuse of thin Veils and too much death to explain the visions, the strange darkspawn childer, and talking darkspawn. He wanted Liam's input before he speculated any further on what they had experienced.

With the broodmothers destroyed, the strange childer killed, and the remaining darkspawn defeated, Alistair brought his small band back to the surface, setting up camp to allow his now-experienced wardens and recruits time to heal and recover. Sigrun, the only surviving member of her Legion battalion, joined them after Alistair offered her a choice: remain in the Roads and hope to find another Legion patrol or join the wardens and engage in the same fight, but from the surface. After much thought, as they trekked back towards the surface, Sigrun chose the wardens. Alistair handed her a vial of darkspawn blood.

"I hoped you would chose us. Also hoping we don't have the chance to gather any more blood today. You'll need this for your Joining ceremony."

Sigrun took the vial. "It's risky, huh?" Seeing his eyebrows raise, she added, "The other recruits mentioned it. Saves you the trouble of telling me."

He shook his head, frowning. "It is. You should make an informed choice. You can still change your mind."

"No risk to a dead person." She grinned at Alistair's surprised look. "Legion, remember?" He nodded as she put the vial in her pack. "It's better this way. I died when I joined the Legion and I should have died with my brothers and sisters the other day. What's one more death?"

x==========x

Returning to Drydenton and the Warden-Commander's Arms, Alistair informed his wardens that they would hold a Joining ceremony here, rather than waiting to return to the Peak. Avernus had found a way to preserve a small amount of prepared potion for Alistair to carry with him. He also recommended using the collected darkspawn blood as soon as possible to ensure the improved potion worked. The two warden recruits and Sigrun had their vials of darkspawn blood and Alistair had the new Joining potion; he saw no reason to wait.

Since all the wardens had been trained by the man they called Ser Alun, and he had overseen their Joining, none thought it odd that a non-warden should administer the potion. Some wondered why Ser Alun was not a warden, but, given his often-taciturn attitude and senior status, none asked. The wardens gathered in one of the large private rooms of the inn, forming a half circle around the three recruits. Alistair stood in front of them, holding a chalice.

Seeing the wardens' reluctance to meet the eyes of the recruits, Sigrun wondered if she had made the right choice. She had run from battle while her Legion companions fought and died, but now she faced real death by choice, not the figurative death one achieved when joining the Legion. She watched the other two recruits drink from the chalice, collapse, and survive, and then Ser Alun turned and offered the chalice to her. She hesitated, then straightened her shoulders, reached for the vessel and drank. Suppressing her gag reflex, she swallowed the vile brew and swayed before collapsing. Only partially conscious, she heard Alun say she lives, as he had for the other recruits, and felt herself lifted and carried to an already made up bed. A warden would sit by each of the recruits through the night as they slept. The remaining wardens got up early and helped the inn's cook prepare a huge breakfast.

"So, Darkspawn do talk. We didn't imagine it in Kal'Hirol?" Sigrun asked when she awoke to find Ser Alun sitting by her bed.

"Why would you ask?" Ser Alun replied.

"I dreamed of a talking darkspawn leading an attack on a farmhold."

The other two new wardens looked at Sigrun, then echoed her story. They too had dreamed of talking darkspawn and attacks. Alistair sighed, but refrained from commenting about seeing an Archdemon at his Joining. In truth, I'm not sure which is more terrifying. Talking darkspawn mean darkspawn who can think without the Archdemon. If they can control the 'spawns hive mind should we expect a Blight without the Archdemon? Instead, he confirmed that reports had come in about a talking darkspawn, but that the one the wardens had encountered at the Vigil had been killed, as had any they had met in Kal Hi'rol. He promised to let them know if any more news came from Denerim and suggested the new wardens and the three accompanying them join the others in the common room for breakfast. He added that they would spend the day in Drydenton doing some maintenance around the inn and return to the Peak the next day. A day spent on light work would let him observe the new wardens, allow time for recovery, and ensure none had suffered any other effects of the Joining. Only one recruit had died since they began using the new Joining potion, and that recruit had already suffered from Blight sickness, but Alistair still worried there might be unanticipated effects after only a few months use.

No sooner had they begun chopping wood, removing the soiled straw mats from the inn's floors, and preparing new straw mats to replace them, while the inn's own staff prepared fresh herbs to strew underfoot, than heads started snapping up and his own blood, untainted though it was, began to tingle. One of the wardens said, "I sense them."

Relieved that someone had spoken, so he wouldn't have to explain his order, he shouted, "Get your weapons." He and most others wore their leathers so they only needed to buckle sword belts, grab shields, don bracers, quivers, and gloves, and string bows. He herded the inn's owner, cook, servants, and housekeeper into the windowless scullery next to the large kitchen and shut the door, hoping they would follow instructions and bar it from the inside.

His warrior and light fighting wardens he placed in front of the single door into the stables, with the mage and archers in the open windows of the loft above them. They had a steep hillside at their back behind the stable, leaving the darkspawn no chance to flank them or attack from behind. No sooner had they taken positions than the darkspawn struck.

"Take out the emissaries first," he yelled, searching with his templar sense for the telltale signs of mana. When none appeared, he felt relieved, but only for a moment, as an ogre stomped out of the trees towards his troop. "Adeliza," he bellowed, calling on the mage, "focus on the ogre. Archers, take out its eyes. The rest of you, focus on the other darkspawn." As he spoke, he sidled along the stable wall, hoping to get behind the ogre, sever a knee or ankle muscle and bring it down. Before he could reach the ogre, he saw Sigrun appear out of nowhere and slice across the ogre's left ankle, eliciting a roar as the ogre tried to spin and swipe at the nimble dwarf. Its leg collapsing under it, the ogre fell, as Sigrun rolled away to her right, stood, and sliced through the monster's right ankle. Unable to stand, the ogre's arms still posed a threat as it grasped and flailed at anyone who approached. Waving Sigrun off, Ser Alun circled the beast, staying out of reach, until he stood above the head which lurched from side-to-side trying to see anything that threatened it. Out of its sight, Ser Alun moved forward and plunged his blade into the ogre's eye socket when the chance arose. The ogre lay still. The other wardens soon brought the genlocks and hurlocks down, but the two new wardens, struggling with two shrieks, fought on. Adeliza sent a lightening blast that jumped from one shriek to another, while Sigrun, again appearing out of nowhere, stabbed one in the neck while the other wardens thrust their blades into the second shriek's abdomen. Both fell. Sigrun sliced each across the neck, just to make sure they died.

"Where did they come from?" one warden asked. "It seemed like I felt nothing and then the awareness came over me at strength. In the mine it crept up, getting stronger as they approached."

Alistair pondered how to answer. "I'm told," he said, "by experienced wardens, that the ground can hide their approach. If they come from underground you may not sense them until they emerge. We should look for a cave in the area and, if it connects to the Deep Roads, we should seal it."

In fact, they found a cave the next day, postponing their return to the Peak to find and seal it against future incursions so near to the Dryden village. One warden suggested they should search for more caves; Ser Alun assured him they would set up patrols to do just that, but, first, they would return to Soldier's Peak, so he could file a report, via bird, to the Warden-Commander, and re-supply before setting out on any further patrols.

The more he observed her the more Sigrun reminded Alistair of Taina. Both were casteless and rogues, but it was more than that. Sigrun, from her experiences as a Legionnaire, also had natural instincts that made her a good leader. He would put her in charge of one of the patrols seeking out other darkspawn lairs. As they marched back through the tunnels, he watched her make note of their route; he had no doubt she would find her way in and out without guides on her first trip. She still had her stone sense and would not lose it if he could help it.

x==========x

"What do you mean he's not here?" Alistair asked Levi, his voice rising. "And what assassins? How could an assassin even get in here?"

The Dryden family leader shook his head as he sat with Alistair on the steps leading up to the Keep's entrance. "The assassin came in with one of our caravans. He had worked with us for years. How could we know he was a Crow? Zevran said someone called Master Ignacio had agents all over Ferelden, some he didn't use for years like this one. Zevran caught him and killed him, but he said he would only endanger us…you…and left to go to Antiva and, as he said, settle this matter. He left a note for you." Levi handed him a sealed parchment with only the letter 'A' on it.

Alistair took the note and retreated to his room, which seemed empty without Zevran lounging by the hearth, warming himself against the chill Fereldan winds. He broke the seal and unfolded the parchment.

Caro,

I must settle the charges against me by appealing to my own House Arainai. I can convince them Ignacio should never have offered me the contract, given that a Cousland was involved, but that will only clear my name for now…and possibly only with my House and its allies. As First Talon of the Crows, the other Houses should leave me alone if House Arainai demands it, but one can never be sure with Crows. I hope my House will act in my favor, that all will be forgotten and, one day, if all goes well, I can return to you.

The contract remains a problem, caro. Nothing my house does will cancel the contract itself. Ignacio's House will believe the contract against you and Liam in effect, unless someone cancels it. Arl Nathaniel Howe can do that as Arl Rendon's heir. Perhaps Liam can ask him, yes? It would not hurt if Lady Delilah supports her brother. That will solve one problem, keeping you and Liam safe.

I must stay away for a time, my friend, for I fear, since the attack came at Soldier's Peak, that some will wonder why I was there and wonder about the mercenary I befriended. They might think you live. Silly, yes? You look quite dead to me, but I must convince any who disbelieve in your death that they are mistaken. Then I must stay away from you - at least until I am certain no one follows me in hopes of finding you. As I mentioned…if all goes well, we will see each other again.

I am sorry to leave so abruptly, but others will follow if I remain. Besides, I hate goodbyes. So messy. Take care my friend. I shall miss you.

Z.

Alistair felt his eyes fill and he brushed his knuckles across them. His last friend, his last contact with…everything. Dead. I am dead. No one can approach me without revealing my secret and putting themselves in danger. He had not thought he could feel so desolate, but he found Zev's departure left another hollow in what was left of his heart. He tossed the parchment onto the coals and watched it crumple and burn.

Sitting at dinner that night, he did not notice Sigrun watching him. The dwarf recognized his expression. She had seen it in the eyes of dwarves capitulating to Carta demands or joining the Legion, having lost everything. She wondered what losses Ser Alun had experienced.

9:31 Dragon, Harvestmere === Soldier's Peak

Morrigan had visited the Peak twice since Alistair arrived. Both times she had shape-shifted and flown to Avernus' tower, keeping her visit invisible to the Drydens. In August, she had come to stay, arriving in human form as she feared that shape-shifting might harm the child and desiring to hide her pregnancy from prying eyes, including her mother's. Now, on an unusual warm day in Harvestmere, Morrigan walked along the rampart which joined the main building at Soldier's Peak with Avernus' tower. The man she approached, leaning over the parapet to stare into the dense forest, did not turn towards her. "What now, Morrigan?" he asked. Usually the mage did not join him on the ramparts. They had met here only a few times, the last being in August, but he knew she observed him. He could feel her mana when she peered out of the tower's window.

"You've come here every day since the…since Zevran left."

"It's quiet. Except for the servants who bring Avernus' food, no one crosses this part of the battlements."

"But you relish the company of others." Her brow wrinkled, as she regarded him.

He met that look, and then raised his shoulders and sighed. "Alistair enjoyed the company of others. Alun does not. I'm a ghost, Morrigan. Everything I say about myself is a story. Nothing is true, except my skills. When I train, I can relax because everything I do during training is true, but afterwards, it's all a lie. Ser Alun spends his time alone, either ordering supplies, exploring the depths of the dungeons and the Deep Roads portal, tending to armor, or hiding here, where no one else comes."

Morrigan chuckled then. "Except me."

One side of Alistair's mouth quirked up as his eyebrows raised. "You know who I am. I can be me. Odder things may have happened, but not often. I won't reject your company," he said quietly and nodded towards her belly. "You're feeling well?"

"Yes, but I, oddly, agree with you, it does get lonely. Even I find this place…isolating. T'is difficult to wander the woods here, as I did in the Wilds. I can no longer shape-shift - t'would endanger the child." She rubbed the bulge beneath the full-length gown she wore. "He has become quite active. I look forward to the birth, when Liam will join me."

"That's still the plan?" Alistair asked, recalling their conversation two months ago after he had discovered Morrigan in Avernus' tower with no plans to leave until after her child's birth. They had spoken then, just before the bird had arrived from Liam ordering him to Kal'Hirol and telling him of the talking darkspawn in Amaranthine.

"Avernus as mid-wife," he had quipped, chuckling, when Morrigan explained her plans. She had sniffed, saying that Anders and Liam would visit the Peak just before her time and stay until the baby came. A slight frown had formed and he had asked why they wouldn't come sooner.

"If you must know, darkspawn still roam Amaranthine. Taina has gone to Vigil's Keep to set up a post and find the source, with Arl Howe's support."

"Arl…ah, Nathaniel."

"T'is his title, is it not?"

"Just hard to get used to. There's a period called the Thaw after every Blight," Alistair added, addressing her other comment. "Is this different? Does Liam even know?"

"T'is different, or so Liam thinks. A greater number of darkspawn and…they attacked the Vigil, killing many of the Nevarran wardens Liam had sent there to help Nathaniel. Anders and Denis arrived in time to drive them off, but many died and much damage was done. Anders said one darkspawn spoke to them."

"Spoke? As in used words?" Alistair said.

"Usually speaking involves words, Alistair."

"Well, one could speak gibberish, you know, ooglabootia ringalingadingdong."

Morrigan rubbed her temple. "Sometimes I think you have become tolerable and then-"

Alistair laughed. "-Morrigan, you have made my day. I haven't laughed in weeks."

"I am so pleased to have amused you."

Upon his return from Kal'Hirol, he had not visited Avernus' tower, being preoccupied with sending out patrols to search for roving darkspawn bands, sealing their lairs, and, when she returned from her patrols, exploring the dungeons and Deep Roads access with Sigrun. Thanks to her experience in the Legion, the former Legionnaire had worked with Mikhael Dryden to repair the damaged dwarven door to the Deep Roads so it closed and locked. In the dungeons themselves, they found old prison cells, what might have been a torture chamber (whatever it takes, he had thought, recalling the ghostly battle between Sophia Dryden's wardens and King Arlen's troops), old documents, supplies - including runes, what appeared to be a container of Archdemon blood, lyrium dust, potions, and enchanted armor and weapons. He also had Sigrun evaluate the tunnel to the sea; he did not want it collapsing on Levi's family as they brought in goods from the small dock at the tunnel's end.

Levi had encouraged him to bring in more supplies by sea from Amaranthine, Higheverport and, sometimes, Kirkwall. Levi's own contacts sailed to the tiny harbor from Fereldan ports, but, at Levi's suggestion, Alistair had begun a correspondence with a dwarf in Kirkwall who could supply him with almost anything he required, particularly things which Levi could not provide, including lyrium for the warden mages. According to Levi, the dwarf had contacts with a whole network of dwarven merchants throughout the Marches; even more important, while a bit expensive, he could be discreet. The ships he sent directly from Kirkwall would never reveal their destinations. Or their passengers, he thought.

"Alistair!" Morrigan's sharp tone brought him back to the present. "Liam mentioned the talking darkspawn you met in Kal'Hirol. He said that more had appeared in Amaranthine."

"In my last report, I told him we'd found no further talking darkspawn. It's troubling that he has," he said as she crossed her arms, "but I've thought of something else since."

"How incredible," Morrigan said.

"Right - me thinking. Anyway, tell him he should write to Fiona and ask her about talking darkspawn. She met one once."

"Truly?"

"Truly."

"I shall tell him but, why won't you?"

"How does Ser Alun know Fiona? Or that he should ask her? My reports are not secret."

"Ah, of course. I shall let him know." She looked at the young man, a long scar running from his temple, just above his left ear, down along his left jaw. He had a scruffy beard and had let his reddish blond hair grow back into the short style he had worn at Ostagar, but she suspected many of his companions from that day would still not recognize him. He had lost all his boyishness. Fine wrinkles had formed around his eyes, which she realized looked more gray than the hazel she remembered. She recalled Mel telling her that they changed color with his moods and that gray meant angry or upset. His once ready grin rarely appeared.

"You must miss Liam," Alistair said, changing the subject. "And he, you."

"I do miss his company, although I've been busy with my own research and helping Avernus."

"Your research?"

"In the library at night when no one else is there." She smoothed her hand over her belly and stared at Alistair.

"What? Food on in my beard? I thought I cleaned it before I came out."

Rolling her eyes, she huffed. "I thought to explain to you why you live. Liam and I thought you should know."

"Oh? Something you did, I assume?"

"Yes, and I would think you would be grateful." When he said nothing, she continued. "T'was an ancient ritual, performed just before the Archdemon's death."

"You knew when the Archdemon would die?"

"Not exactly. I believed you, Liam and your allies would prevail. We performed-"

"-we? Liam?" His voice rose slightly. "Liam agreed to this?"

"To save your life, or the life of whomever killed the Archdemon, yes, he agreed," she said, re-crossing her arms.

"And what did you get?" he said, not quite glaring at the witch.

"We got a child, conceived of the ritual and ready to accept the Old God, Urthemiel's, untainted soul."

"Your child is an Old God?"

"No. Our child will carry the soul of Urthemiel." She frowned. "Beyond that, there are things I do not know or understand, hence the research."

He laughed. "Something you admit not understanding! Your mother sent you with us to capture an Old God." He made it a statement. "She didn't explain why or what she planned, did she?"

"She did send me, but she will NOT have my…our son. T'is why I am here. Why I will conceal myself and Kieran-"

"-Kieran? You know it's a boy?"

"Yes, and we will make sure my mother does not find us."

"So, this research…it's about an old god child?"

She had glared, but conceded that she did seek to know more before the child was born, warning him not to reveal what she had confided. Liam believed Alistair should understand why he lived, that it would help and assure him that, indeed, the Archdemon, Urthemiel, had died.

"Liam wanted you to know." She pulled her cape around her folding her arms to hold it in place and watched as Alistair turned and stared out over the forest. A hawk screeched above them. He seemed to have forgotten her. "Alistair."

"Sorry, Morrigan, my mind drifted."

"T'is unfortunate I am such dull company, then."

"It's not you, Morrigan, it's me. I'm a dead man and I look back to times when I thought myself alive. I should have died killing that beast. I'm grateful, or should be, but-"

"-you miss the elf."

"He has a name. Zevran. And yes, I miss him." He shut his eyes and ran a hand through his short hair. "And Lys."

"I miss her too," Morrigan said softly. "I never had a friend before."

They leaned on the bridge's rampart, staring silently into the dark forest for a long time before Morrigan spoke again. "You once asked me what I would do if my mother died."

"You said you would laugh."

"And I would, but, I understand now why you would ask such a question. I did not laugh when I learned of Mel's death. I searched, Alistair, because I did not believe it. I flew into every space I could find. I did not find any sign her or Kai. I would like to think that means they live somewhere, but I believe the harsh truth is that they are dead."

"I think so too, Morrigan. I'd be out there searching, if I thought otherwise." His laugh this time sounded more like a bark. "I've never had to live without hope. Even when the Chantry held me prisoner, I had this tiny spark of hope. I don't anymore. Lyssie's gone, I have no friends, no family, at least none who know I'm alive or can acknowledge me; I can no longer be a warden…there's nothing." He saw her frown deepening. "Oh, don't fret, as if you would." His smiled, or grimaced. "I'm not doing away with myself…I'm neither brave or cowardly enough to do that. I'm here, so don't send a bird to Liam. I just don't feel…useful."

"T'is reassuring to know that. Liam would…he regrets leaving you alone, but-"

"-yeah, it's dangerous for him to come here and maybe lead the Orlesians to the stronghold or me. I get it, Morrigan."

"If you wish to meet here, I would converse with you-"

"-don't Morrigan. This meeting is one thing, but if you promised to meet me for Liam or Lys' sake - you'd be bristling with unspent lightening spells in no time."

Morrigan bit her lip to stop a smile. "Most likely, Alistair. You do annoy."

"Thanks," he said. "I aim to please. Give Liam my best next time you write. I've stopped writing. I'm leaving it to Levi or Sigrun, now. Safer."

"You will see him in two months."

"Right. I'll look forward to it." He walked back to the keep, away from Morrigan and Avernus' tower. Morrigan shut her eyes to keep back tears, a new sensation for her, and laid a hand on her belly. You almost had a friend, Kieran, but that baby died without ever seeing this world. She watched Alistair enter the keep. He never knew. She never knew. Our babies would have been born within weeks of each other. T'is better this way, for him not to know, but still sad.

Morrigan made her way back, leaning forward against the wind which had risen as they talked. She recalled placing herself as close to the Archdemon as possible during the battle, pleased that Alistair had sent Mel to a ballista, well away from the beast. Her own pregnancy was the newer of the two, so the new life in her should attract the Old God's soul, but better, she had believed, that Mel remain farther away. Farther away, not dead, although, before he collapsed, Zevran had seemed sure both Kai and Mel had survived the battle. The darkspawn fled, they did not fight their way out. T'is unlikely the women had to fight again. Zevran said Mel had used the ashes on Kai, but that they both breathed. How could they disappear with no trace?" The witch shook her head as she pulled open the door to the blood mage's tower. We searched and found nothing. Leave it. People disappear in battle, or so the histories tell us.

x==========x

It's better this way, Alistair thought as he hurried down the tunnel to the dock where the Chained Maiden, a small galley out of Kirkwall, would arrive that night with no cargo to deliver. No one save Alistair knew it would dock. Alistair had written to the dwarf in Kirkwall requesting that a galley dock in secret on Satinalia Eve to load a special cargo. Load the two chests and an oddly sized crate waiting on the dock and deliver it to a certain dwarf at the Hanged Man in Kirkwall, had been the only instructions he provided. No one in the Keep would notice his absence for a day or more. He always left celebrations early.

A/N: Thank you for reading and to those of you who reviewed, favorited or gave kudos. Thanks to my wonderful betas Kira Tamarion and Elyssa Cousland whose efforts make this a better story. Any errors are mine. I hope you continue to read and enjoy.