There really was no one that Mary could talk to about this, she realized that really quickly.
Dean and Sam were out, she didn't feel comfortable enough to talk to them about her being pregnant and whether or not to have the child. She knew that it was a bad thing to think, they were her sons and this would be their sibling so she should be able to talk to them but the thought made her stomach churn.
Castiel was out as well. A team member or not he was an angel and she was sure that as an angel he would be pro-life regardless of the situation. He would be too biased in making sure that the kid was born so she couldn't talk to him.
Jack was still a child in so many ways, he pretended that he was mature the entire time but he was still so naive that this wasn't something that she could talk to him about either.
She didn't feel too close to either Jody or Donna either, she didn't want to talk to them about this.
Mary sighed and turned onto her side, curling on the bed and clutching the blanket around her tighter.
She had to think about this logically. She was in a dangerous situation at the moment, she was hunting and Michael was still as issue with her son, and she was running on caffeine and takeout. Nothing of which equaled having a healthy pregnancy for the child.
On the other hand...she and John had spoken about this. Once the terror that had been the pregnancy, labor, and raising of Dean had passed, they had talked about more kids in the future. Sam had been a bit earlier than they had expected, and if she was being honest with herself, he was earlier than they wanted.
Once they realized that she was pregnant it turned from terror to wanting. They had wanted Dean. They had wanted Sam. And when it was night and the kids were asleep they whispered about waiting a bit longer and then having another kid. Surprisingly John had put the idea that maybe for a girl.
Mary wrapped her arms around her stomach and curled in closer to herself. Almost forty years later and it had happened, she was pregnant with their third child and this time...this time…
This time she was alone, John wasn't here and it took everything she had not to go to the library to find a time travel spell and bring either herself to the past or John to the future again.
Weighing the pros and the cons of everything, the empty feeling in her chest, the churning of her stomach, she did think about going to the bathroom to throw up for a moment but thankfully it passed.
Her hand came up to the chain around her neck and she gripped at her wedding ring tightly, feeling the tears prickling in her eyes as she came to a decision.
Sighing she got up and went to her desk, turning her laptop on. She stared at the screen for a moment before she opened maps and looked for the nearest Planned Parenthood.
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