Chapter 5

"Alright students, have a great day and remember test on Friday. Meaning only a two more days to study!" Hiccup's professor yelled as everyone walked out of class.

Hiccup stood at his desk gathering up the last of his things while Astrid stood beside him at her desk packing her book bag in an expert fashion. He glanced over at her and shook his head as he watched her, rigid and precise, just like her and the way she carried out this bodyguard job. It had been a week since the day in the deli when he had begun to feel optimistic about the arrangement between them and in that week Hiccup had come to realize that his optimism was very premature. While Astrid was cordial to him and his friends they really hadn't made any progress in knowing anything about her. She was still a complete enigma to him.

The only thing he had learned about her was that the girl liked schedules and order. Two things that Hiccup did very poorly, which had resulted in the two butting heads on several issues. Mainly her total control and his seeming lack of it. He was slowly beginning to feel like he had a nanny, a deadly beautiful one but still a nanny.

"Hey Hiccup!" His classmates Olaf and Fen walked up to him and Astrid.

"Hey Guys, what's up?" He finished packing his bag and looked at the pair.

"We wanted to know if you wanted to study at our place for the test. We could use a bit of that Haddock brain power." Hiccup chuckled nervously he knew he was in the top of the class and could probably help them but the feeling of anxiety that was beginning to bloom in his chest kept him from answering them right away.

Astrid watched the interaction with a critical eye and mild annoyance. She thought about the last week with Hiccup and the only word she could describe it was, 'tiring.'

Every single decision she made, all of which were to keep him safe, he questioned. 'Why do we have to take this route Astrid?' 'Why are you following me into the bathroom? Do you always drink so much?' She heard in her mind, nasally voice included.

She had hopes that they would find common ground but it seemed that her and Hiccup Haddock were just too different. Though she did note that his stutter had all but stopped around her. 'Thank the Gods' It only seemed to come up now when he was nervous, which happened to be right this instant.

One of the most frustrating oddities that she still couldn't understand was Hiccup's anxieties toward pretty much everything. Other than school and the house the pair went very few other places. Once they went to the library but even then he didn't want to stay, just grab the books and go. Even at the house him and his friends shared he preferred to be up in his room like a recluse. The most peculiar part about it no one mentioned anything about it, as if it was normal behavior. They all just smiled and nodded at him and let him be his strange hermit self. Never pushing him. Coddling him.

'It was all very frustrating.' She thought as she continued to watch the interaction. Just then she saw Hiccup's tell, he nervously scratched his neck and the stutter began. 'He's going to reject them.' She thought bitterly.

"Well-uh-well I don't know I'm uh pretty busy. So-sorry guys." The two men shook their heads and gave him a nod before walking away. Hiccup began to turn towards Astrid when he heard Olaf mutter to Fen "I knew he wouldn't come," before walking out of the classroom.

Astrid watched as Hiccup heard what they said, his face switching through several emotions: anxiety, hurt, embarrassment and finally a fake mask slid into place and he looked back up her way. "We should get going I have a lot of studying to do." Astrid said nothing and followed him as he walked out the door. Somewhat concerned but mostly please she didn't have to get any push back from telling him it was time to go.

The two walked into the front door after a rather tense ride, Hiccup only making one comment about her driving and one complaint about her taking an alternate route home. Heather greeted them in the kitchen where she was chopping vegetables at the counter. "Hey Hiccup, hey Astrid." Hiccup gave a small wave before heading up the stairs for what Astrid was sure the rest of the night.

Astrid hung back in the kitchen and watched Hiccup ascend the stairs, waiting until he was out of view before turning to Heather and staring her down. Heather, feeling the burn of Astrid's gaze immediately stopped chopping and looked up at her.

"Why do you do that?" Astrid asked point blank.

Heather's eyes darted around the room obviously searching for some kind of clue as to what Astrid meant. "Dooo what?"

"Treat Hiccup like that?"

Immediately clarity passed through Heather's eyes, she sat the knife down and stared at the chopped vegetables as if she was gathering her thoughts. Astrid knew Heather would be the right one to broach the subject to, the girl was getting a degree to be a therapist and work for Berk's government helping its soldiers. So if anyone was going to be able to explain the inner workings of Hiccup Haddocks mind it was Heather.

After a long pause she finally spoke, "Hiccup has been through a lot…we…we just all decided to let him live the way he wanted to. Not force any help on him."

Astrid's eyes narrowed at the raven haired girl. She had read Hiccup's file cover to cover and the only bad thing that had ever happened in his life was his Mom and Gobber's disappearance. So the only reasonable answer would be it had something to do what that but was that really enough to screw him up so badly. She didn't think so.

"Everyone has been through a lot. Why coddle him?"

She let out a small chuckle, "You're right you, me, everyone has gone through a lot but not everyone reacts to it the same. Hiccup…well Hiccup became the Hiccup that's here today after his Mom and Gobber disappeared…" she took a breath, "he started to change. His dad tried to force him into getting help but…well that only made it worse. So we all came up with the plan that everyone would move in here and we just try and support him."

Astrid's annoyance for all parties involved in this plan even the General grew exponentially. 'How could they just treat him like that? He maybe alive and well but in no way is he living his life.' She thought as her piercing gaze turned into a glare.

"Ignore the problem, you think that's the solution?" Astrid bit out through clenched teeth, her hands balled at her side.

Heather quickly returned Astrid's glare and chastising response with one of her own, "should he just drink them away then? Is that the solution you recommend? Hmm?" Her arms crossed over her chest as she waited for Astrid's reply.

For a brief moment Astrid was at a loss for words. No one had seen through her as quickly as Heather did. Even though Heather knew nothing of her past and the sins that she had committed, she felt like everything was on display that very second. Every horrible damn thing she had every done or seen. 'I should have known she's much more perceptive than the others.'

Taking a moment to gather her thoughts and emotions Astrid gave Heather an obvious look up and down before nodding and gave the other girl a sardonic grin, "whatever works right?" Not wanting to hear anymore insight from Heather, Astrid, immediately turned and grabbed her favorite whiskey from the counter before heading outside for a long evening with her thoughts.

The next day went similar to the previous, other than Hiccup throwing a fit about Astrid following him into the bathroom, something she thought he blew way out of proportion. His childish attitude starting to strain her nerves more today than ever. Probably a result of the conversation she had with Heather last night and the memories it drudged up for her.

'Who cares it's just pee.' She thought with an eye roll as the pair walked into the house near dinner. Today was one of Hiccup's longer days which meant everyone else was already home by the time they arrived. Which is why they found all the other house occupants currently lounging around the living room talking or watching TV.

Ruffnut saw the pair first and jumped up from the couch to greet them. "Hey Hiccup…Hey killer." Astrid cocked an eyebrow at her greeting, "how was school?" Astrid shrugged and Hiccup gave a noncommittal noise.

"Great awesome, sooo we were wondering if the two of you wanted to come to a party tomorrow?" She asked and motioned to all the occupants in the room as they gave a small nod in agreement.

One thing that Astrid prides herself in is not getting surprised often. Over the years she had had more enemies then she could count try and get the jump on her and none of them surprised her as much as the question that just left Ruffnut's mouth. She briefly wondered if her talk with Heather yesterday spurred this olive branch of sorts. 'Maybe they are going to finally stop treating him like a child.'

Giving a glance over to Hiccup she quickly realized that no matter how great an opportunity this was that they were giving him, he was going to say no to his friends. Say no to living his life and break out of his shell. Her anger began to grow as he tell went into full swing, hand behind the neck, eyes darting, nervous laugh. He was fully panicked and it pissed her off.

Whether it was from all the frustrations of the last week, the conversation with Heather or just her own short temper in dealing with certain solutions, Astrid didn't know, but at that moment it didn't matter; she was fed up. She wanted this group to be honest with their friend, stop handling him like he were glass but most importantly she wanted Hiccup to own up and be honest with himself. Realize he was not living any sort of normal life.

She thought with a tinge of anger, 'Thor knows, some of us haven't had the luxury to hide away from our problems we've just had to live with our horrors and move on.'

A million thought were running through Hiccup's mind and his heart was racing after the question Ruffnut had just asked him. 'A party? Tomorrow? Uh, Thor…I…I…' his normal anxiety starting to take hold.

"He won't go." Came a cold voice from the other side of the room causing all eyes to snap to Astrid. Her narrowed eyes fixated straight on Hiccup who look looked back at her confused.

They stared at each other a moment before he found the ability to say anything, "wha-what was that?" Hiccup felt like something was crushing his chest when he asked the question. She sounded so cold and detached, not anything like the Astrid he had known the last week.

Never breaking his gaze she answered him, "you won't go." She said slowly, enunciating every word. "Just tell them…oh wait you don't have to, they already know. They're just to scared to say anything." Hiccup eyes widened in shock at her words and he gazed around the room only to see looks of guilt forming on all the people in the room. At this point he couldn't hear much over his rapidly beating heart as his eyes finally found their way back to Astrid's cold ones. The one who was the cause of this distress. Quickly his panic was turning to anger. 'How-how dare she? She doesn't know me!'

"Wh-where do you get off saying what I-I will or won't do?!" His voice raising and his motioning his hands between him and his blonde bodyguard.

Astrid gave a cold chuckle, "I've been around you for a week and I can already read you like a book Hiccup. Your stuttering and nervous actions, your reclusiveness, your anxiety and fear and Thor damned your complaining! We all have had shit in our past Hiccup, grow up, move on and live your damned life!"

Almost immediately Astrid regretted the words that had tumbled out of her mouth. She hadn't meant to say it, well she did but not like this…never like this. She just wanted him to so badly stop living in a broken state, she should know considering that's how she's been for the last ten years.

Knowing that her anger didn't solely stem from Hiccup, and his want to fade into the background of his own life. That most of it came from all the horrible events she herself had to push through, all the shit she had to just get over and move on from or peoples lives would have been forfeited. Including her own. All the pain she had to bury deep inside and keep her mask of indifference firmly in place. Only made what she said worse. It was then that a horrifying realization hit her like a herd of yaks, she saw herself in Hiccup. Fearful, anxiety driven Hiccup…

Unfortunately for Hiccup, Astrid couldn't even begin to make him understand that pain and realization so instead she had done what she did best, lashed out. Something she had perfected over the years.

'Damn it.' Was all she could think further as she watched Hiccup break apart in front of her.

As Hiccup listened to the venom laced words that tumbled out of Astrid's mouth, he felt his world getting smaller and smaller. Each word she said piercing his heart with unbelievable accuracy. To make matters worse was the fact that they were coming from the girl who he was slowly developing a small crush on. While the two butted heads, were complete opposites and he knew nothing about her. He couldn't help but feel something for her. 'Well did feel something.'

With his heart beating wildly out of his chest and his breathing ragged he glanced one more time at Astrid, the girl who had just crushed him and took off running. Sprinting as fast as he could up the stairs and into his room before slamming the door. Cutting him off from the world, off from his friends and mort importantly off from Astrid.

Astrid stood there staring at the vacant spot where Hiccup once stood, still able to see his broken green eyes staring at her. No one dared to utter a word during the whole exchange or after. Clearly afraid of Astrid's wrath, or maybe they agreed with her and just didn't want to say so. Whatever the reason was Astrid didn't feel like finding out. So like the previous night she stomped towards the kitchen grabbing her favorite bottle of whiskey again but this time marched up the stairs and into her room beside Hiccup's; slamming her door in the same deafening fashion as he had done. Taking a swig of the bottle, she was ready to drowned out all the memories and emotions she currently had swirling inside of her. The freshest one being the broken look on Hiccup's face that she had single handedly caused.

"Hiccup…Hiccup…" Heather gently knocked on his door an hour after the explosive conversation downstairs. When he didn't respond she gave a pointed glare to the door that rested next to his. Wishing she could give Astrid a piece of her mind.

Heather knew what they were doing to Hiccup wasn't helping him, it was a bandaid but she also knew Hiccup's Father didn't want to push him again. The last time he did so ending in a disastrous fashion. So they had all agreed to just be there for him and hope that someday enough time would go by and he would come out of this strange place he was in.

But Astrid had been right, what they were doing wasn't helping, if anything it was only making him worse. As time went on his anxiety and fears seemed to be ruling his life, where his adventurous spirit and love for life once did.

'Though she didn't have to be so damn mean about it.' Heather thought with another glare to the door.

Ever since Astrid had come into the house, Heather had been observing her silently. The first violent outburst the day they met being her fist red flag and as she watched she saw many more spring up. The drinking, her social issues, her hyper awareness even more than required to be an effective bodyguard. They were all signs of PTSD, Heather should know, she was specializing in treating it. No two cases of PTSD were the same and for Astrid it looked like she was still able to complete her job. At least until she met Hiccup and if Heather had to guess the reason Hiccup got under her skin so much is because Astrid saw a lot of herself in him.

Shaking her head she turned back to Hiccup's door and knocked again, "Hiccup, its Heather please open up…" after another minute of waiting Heather heard the lock click and the door opened to reveal a red eyed Hiccup trying to give her a weak smile.

Slipping carefully inside, Heather immediately pulled Hiccup into a hug. The two went way back to when at thirteen she became a refugee of Berk when she escaped from her old home, Berserker island. Stoick had been the one to personally save her and bring her to Berk, something she was forever grateful for. So while they found her a permanent foster family she lived with the Haddocks and by the end of the few months there her and Hiccup had practically become siblings. Even after she moved in with her new family their bond grew.

Heather released her grip and maneuvered the two to his bed to sit down for a very long overdue conversation. She rubbed his back a bit while Hiccup took another swipe at his eyes, "Hiccup I'm so sorry about what Astrid said, she had no–"

"She was right." Came his gravely voice cutting her off.

Heather's eyes brows furrowed, "what?"

He looked up and met her eyes, "she was right…I mean she told me in a horrible way but…she was right, about everything. Is-is everyone really that scared to say anything to me?" He looked pleadingly into her eyes, begging her to be truthful to him. So for the first time in two years she was 100% straight with him.

"Yes…the-the thing is Hiccup, we know how hard loosing your Mom and Gobber was and it was easier to not upset you than have you slip into a depression again. We just…" she took a breath and composed herself before continuing, "we were wrong, Hiccup. I'm sorry…but I will say I do miss the old Hiccup…everyone does." He nodded and ducked his head down, it was then that Heather began to worry about what the impact of this information might do to him.

Just as she was sure she would have to give Stoick a call, Hiccup lifted his head and looked right at her. "Well I guess there's only one thing to do now…" a small smile began to spread across his face.

"…what?" Heather asked almost scared of the answer.

"Something crazy."

Looks like happy fun times are over for a bit for Hiccup and Astrid.

I really wanted to spend this chapter getting in to why Hiccup is so OOC and why it bugs Astrid so much.

Speaking of Astrid, I wanted to address her PTSD. PTSD is a very personal thing, no two people have the same symptoms and triggers. I used personal experiences with family members and friends to write her character in this story. So hopfully her actions, as confusing as they might be at times, ring true to anyone who has ever suffered from this disorder.

As always thank you so much for the reviews I do read them all and they mean a ton to me.