Year 4: Listen To Your Heart
Chapter 32: October 2014
As October rolled in, Victoire kept waiting for the ball to drop in the dorm, but it never did. Even Ricky had stopped stealing Brianna's things and had resorted to playing with his chew toy, which Raina had bought for him months ago, but which he only now realized he had.
"This is weird, right?" Kara asked Victoire in confidence one night while Brianna was off with Cameron.
"Definitely," Victoire agreed. "All I want to do is scream at Caitlin for leaving her dirty socks on top of my trunk, but I know if I do I'll ruin everything."
"It's like Brianna's been possessed by an alien or something," Kara said.
"It's like all three of them are," Victoire amended. "Brianna, Caitlin, and even Raina for some reason."
"I feel like they're all ticking time bombs," Kara confessed. "One of them is going to go off soon."
"I just hope Brianna doesn't go first" Victoire said.
VvVvVvVvVvV
As Halloween neared, the students of Hogwarts became more and more excited for the annual Halloween dance. Though Victoire tried to share in the collective enthusiasm, she found that she just couldn't.
"I don't think I'm going to go," Victoire confessed one day while she and her friends were studying in the library. Cameron was off with Adrian and Caitlin, so Victoire and Kara were experiencing a rare moment alone with Brianna.
"What?" Brianna cried. "You can't not go, that would be a travesty."
"It wouldn't be the first time," Victoire reminded her, referring to first year.
"That was different," Brianna said. "None of us went."
"I don't have to go," Kara volunteered. "I can stay back in the common room with you."
"No, no, no," Victoire shook her head adamantly. "I don't want to ruin your night. Besides, I'll probably just have a cup of tea and head to bed early."
"I still refuse to accept your refusal to go to this party!" Brianna cried.
"It's not like you'll even notice," Victoire muttered. "You'll be with Cameron the whole night anyway."
"That is besides the point," Brianna waved the comment off. "The point is that this is supposed to be a fun night for us all to dance a little and eat some sweets and be together and you're going to waste it wallowing in the dorms."
"I just don't think I'm going to have much fun," Victoire sighed.
"Well then I need to know why," Brianna demanded, crossing her arms in front of her.
Victoire shrugged uncomfortably. "There is no why," she claimed. "This just isn't my year."
"Please tell me this isn't about Teddy again," Brianna pleaded.
At the mention of his name, Victoire's throat tightened and she looked at the ground to avoid eye contact with Brianna.
"Oh come on!" Brianna cried. "You're still not over him?"
"Can you keep your voice down?" Victoire requested, not wanting the whole library to be privy to her inner turmoil.
"Fine," Brianna said at a much softer voice. "But come on Victoire, just because you're still hung up on Teddy doesn't mean you can't have a good time at the party."
Victoire stared at the table. "It's just that – Teddy's going to be off dancing with girls all night, and I'm going to be stuck dancing with Derek Nelson or Lawrence Frobisher or someone, and you'll be off with Cameron anyway. So instead of putting myself through all that, I just figured I'd skip it and let you all enjoy your night without having to worry about me moping around the Great Hall."
Kara reached a hand and gently placed it on Victoire's shoulder.
"You know, I really wouldn't mind skipping the dance if it would make you feel better," Kara insisted.
"No," Victoire said. "That would only make me feel worse. Knowing that you could be having a good time, but weren't because of me? You should go to the party. I'm just going to sleep anyway, so there'd be no point staying."
"Okay," Kara said hesitantly. "If you're sure…"
"I am," Victoire assured her.
"Hold on," Brianna cried, raised her hands in outrage. "So we're just letting Victoire skip the dance?"
"Yes," Kara replied with a nod.
"What – why – how - ?"
"Brianna?" Kara said. "Just leave it alone. If Victoire doesn't want to go, she shouldn't be forced. How would you like it if we forced you to attend a Quidditch game?"
"That's completely besides the point," Brianna insisted. "First of all, I would have a terrible time and if Victoire went to the party she'd actually have fun. Secondly, you would never drag me to a Quidditch game because we all hate Quidditch, but we've always had fun at the Halloween party."
"No we haven't," Kara said. "First year none of us had any fun, and I'm pretty sure you were the only one who had fun second year."
"But remember third year?" Brianna asked, choosing to ignore Kara's dig at her behaviour in second year. "We all had a great time and Victoire even ended up dating Nathaniel for a while."
"And look how that turned out," Victoire pointed out. "No, my mind is made up Brianna, so there's no use arguing. I'm not going."
Though Brianna wasn't happy with Victoire's decision, she ended up letting the topic go. There was no point arguing about it if Victoire wasn't going to change her mind, and Brianna had more important things to do – like find a Halloween costume.
"We'll have to find something when we're in Hogsmeade this weekend," Brianna declared a few days later. "I don't know what they'll have available so close to Halloween, but maybe we can figure something out.
"You know my mother is always willing to put something together, even if it's not for me," Victoire pointed out.
"Oh, we couldn't ask that of her," Kara insisted. "It was different when you needed a costume too, but if you're not going then we really shouldn't bother her."
Victoire chose not to mention the letter she'd received from her mother that morning, inquiring as to whether the girls needed costumes this year and whether they had anything particular in mind. She knew her mother loved making them, but this year she would have to settle for helping Dominique and her friends instead.
VvVvVvVvVvV
The night of the Halloween party arrived quicker than Victoire expected. After their last class, the three girls ascended to their dorm so that Kara and Brianna could get ready. For lack of inspiration, Kara had chosen to go as a dementor, throwing a black sheet over herself and cutting a hole in the top for her head. Meanwhile, Brianna had purchased an elaborate devil costume. Her clothes were red and skin tight and she had even found a spell that would cause her to sprout little horns.
"What are you going to eat?" Kara wondered. "All the food's down at the party."
"I've got some stuff in my trunk from maman," Victoire assured her friend. "And besides, I had a lot at lunch."
"That's true," Brianna agreed. "You must've had like… eight or nine sandwiches."
"Hey, they were small, okay?" Victoire defended herself.
"Whatever," Brianna backed off, putting the finishing touches on her makeup. "Alright, what do you think?" she asked, turning around.
"Very fearsome," Kara said.
"But do I look hot?" Brianna asked.
"Absolutely," Victoire assured her. "Cameron will love the costume," she added, knowing that was all Brianna really cared about.
"Are you sure you don't want to come?" Kara asked one last time.
"Positive," Victoire assured her friend. "Go on, I'm going to turn in soon anyway."
"But it's only dinnertime now," Brianna frowned.
"Yeah, well all those sandwiches made me pretty sleepy," Victoire joked.
Brianna seemed satisfied with this answer and dropped the subject. Victoire waved goodbye as her friends departed and then laid back on her bed, staring up at the canopy.
She didn't regret choosing to skip the dance. She knew she would only spend the whole night creepily stalking Teddy to see who he was dancing with and silently wishing he would dance with her. And she knew that that would never happen. She was trying to move on, she really was. It was just difficult. Over the summer, she'd thought she'd sorted her feelings out, but when she'd seen Teddy on the train on September first, all her old emotions had come flooding back.
Once the commotion outside started to die down and Victoire was confident that most of the house was in the Great Hall already, she ventured out of her dorm and down to the empty common room. It was rare that she got the common room to herself – truly to herself – and she was ready to take advantage of it.
First, she padded over to the corner where the Gryffindors kept their mugs and chose her favorite. Then she poured herself some tea from the nearby kettle, which was charmed to always stay warm and to always stay full of tea. Blowing on the tea to cool it a little before taking a sip, Victoire padded back over to the main fireplace and stretched out on the best couch in the room.
Victoire had never had opportunity to sit on, let alone lay down on this couch. While most of the good spots in the common room were unofficially reserved for upperclassmen, this couch was notoriously known as the seventh-year only couch. No underclassman would dare to sit on it, and if a fifth or sixth year tried, they were usually kicked off pretty quickly by someone in seventh. With the common room completely and utterly deserted though, Victoire could do whatever she wanted.
Victoire had contemplated bringing down some homework to work on tonight, but had ultimately decided against it. She wasn't behind yet, and even if she wasn't at the party, she wanted to enjoy her night as much as possible. So instead, she simply laid back against the pillows and serenely watched the fire in the fireplace crackle, slowly becoming absorbed in her own thoughts, so much so, that she didn't even hear it when someone descended from the boys' dormitories.
"Victoire?" a voice asked, startling her and causing her to spill her tea all over herself.
"Teddy?" she asked in surprise. "What are you still doing here? Why aren't you down at the Halloween dance?"
"Well I was on my way down, but then I saw you here and thought I'd ask you the same question. I didn't realize I would scare you like I did," Teddy said.
"Sorry, I was lost in my thoughts," Victoire said. "Anyway, I decided not to go to the dance."
"Why not?" Teddy asked.
Victoire shrugged. If there was anyone she didn't want to share her reasons with, it was Teddy. "I just didn't really feel like it this year," she said vaguely. "Besides… Brianna is with Cameron, and I think Cameron was going to try and set Kara up with Joseph Alderton."
"Sounds like you made the right call," Teddy smirked.
"Yeah," Victoire agreed. "And it was going great until you made me spill my tea."
"I'm really sorry about that," Teddy apologized. "But it's not like I was trying to sneak up on you or anything."
"Alright fine, it was my fault for being so unobservant and not realizing you were in the room," Victoire surrendered. "Happy?"
"Happy that all blame has been removed from my shoulders?" Teddy asked. "You bet I am."
Victoire rolled her eyes. "Well go on then," she said, gesturing for the door. "You're going to be late for the party."
Teddy shrugged. "I can be late," he said.
"Well don't be late on my account," Victoire said. "You're going to miss all the fun."
"Honestly, these dances have never been much fun. Billy always tries to set me up with some girl I have nothing in common with, and then I spend the night trying to come up with things to say while she stares at her fingernails and plays with her hair," Teddy said.
Victoire tried to push the image of Teddy dancing with girls from her mind as she responded. "Well Billy's probably waiting for you now," she said. "You don't want to keep him and whatever girl he's found for you waiting."
"Honestly, I'd really rather not go," Teddy said honestly. "I was thinking about ditching even before I came down here, but now that I see you're ditching too, the prospect is seeming even more appealing."
"Well don't ditch on my account," Victoire repeated her new mantra. "I don't want to ruin your night."
"Ruin?" Teddy cried. "Please, hanging up here with you would be way better than going down there."
"Really?" Victoire asked, her heart giving a little flutter. She silently told her heart to calm down and be quiet, but it didn't care what her brain wanted.
"Totally," Teddy said. "But I think I'm going to need a little more than tea to sustain myself."
Victoire smiled. "Yeah, I had a big lunch because I knew I was going to skip dinner."
"Well how about I head down and grab some stuff to eat and you can change into some clothes that aren't covered in tea?" Teddy suggested.
"Yeah okay," Victoire smiled. "If you're sure this is what you want to do."
"Trust me," Teddy assured her. "It is."
While Teddy made his way downstairs to get some food, Victoire hurried back up to her dorm to get rid of her tea-drenched robes. She threw on a pair of clean pants and a sweater and ran her brush through her hair a few times before returning to the common room and grabbing a fresh cup of tea. Soon, Teddy had returned with a basket of sandwiches and pastries.
"Food was a good idea," Victoire said, grabbing a pastry off the top. "I'm starving."
"I thought you had a big lunch," Teddy commented.
"I did," Victoire agreed. "But that was hours ago."
Teddy laughed and stretched out next to Victoire on the couch.
"So," Teddy said. "What did you have planned for this lovely evening of non-Halloween-ing?"
"Nothing really," Victoire shrugged. "I was going to drink some tea and probably head to bed early. If you'll remember, I thought I was going to be alone."
"You're glad I'm here," Teddy declared. "Admit it."
Victoire smiled. "I'm glad you're here," she said.
"So tell me something," Teddy said.
"Hmm?" Victoire mumbled.
"You broke up with Nathaniel in December," Teddy said. Victoire nodded to indicate that she was following, but had no idea where Teddy was going with this. "So since then, has anyone… caught your eye?"
Victoire swallowed. "Nope," she shrugged. "Not really." She paused and debated asking her next question, but in the end found that she was unable not to, despite the fact that she was afraid to know the answer. "What about you?" she asked. "You and Beverly broke up in May. In all that time, has anyone…"
"Not really," Teddy shrugged.
Victoire felt relief flood through her. She knew that one day Teddy would move on with someone, but she was so glad that day hadn't come yet. She nodded and continued to stare at the fire.
"Your friends didn't want to skip with you?" Teddy asked a moment later.
"I asked them not to," Victoire clarified. "Honestly, I didn't feel like another night of exploding snap and truth or dare."
"You mean we're not going to play exploding snap tonight?" Teddy exclaimed in mock-disappointment. "I was so looking forward to that."
"We can play if you want to," Victoire rolled her eyes. "But it's not much fun with two people."
"Alright then, truth or dare," Teddy said. "Aren't you just dying to know where I go on Wednesdays after class?"
"I didn't realize you went somewhere on Wednesdays," Victoire admitted. "But now that you've brought it up, I'm curious."
"Well since we aren't playing truth or dare, I don't have to tell you," Teddy said.
Victoire shook her head. "Truth or dare?" she asked good-naturedly.
"Truth," Teddy selected.
"Where do you go on Wednesdays after class?" Victoire asked.
"To visit Hagrid," Teddy confessed. "We have tea and rock cakes. Well, I pretend to eat the rock cakes. They're kind of inedible."
"That was terrible," Victoire said. "You made it seem like something good. Now I've gone and wasted a turn."
"You didn't have to ask that question," Teddy pointed out. "You chose to waste it."
"I didn't know it was a bad question," Victoire defended herself. "You made it seem like it was this big mystery."
"Well if you want another question, you're going to have to let me ask one first," Teddy said.
"Fine," Victoire rolled her eyes. "Ask away."
"Truth or dare?" Teddy asked.
"Truth," Victoire chose.
"Would you have preferred to spend the night on your own like you'd planned?" Teddy asked.
Victoire shook her head. "No, I'm actually glad you decided to join me."
Teddy smiled. "Good," he said.
"Okay your turn," Victoire declared. "Truth or dare."
"Truth," Teddy chose.
"What is your deepest darkest secret?" Victoire asked, raising her eyebrows questioningly. "Something even Billy doesn't know."
Teddy shifted uncomfortably. "My deepest darkest secret?" he asked.
"Yup," Victoire confirmed. "Something really deep."
"And really dark?" Teddy asked.
Victoire chuckled. "That's how it works."
"Alright," Teddy decided. "Are you ready?"
"I'm listening," Victoire replied.
"Okay, here goes," Teddy took a deep breath. "I'm deathly afraid of butterflies."
"Wait seriously?" Victoire laughed. "You're afraid of butterflies? That's ridiculous!"
"Hey, don't make fun of my fear," Teddy said, affronted.
"Sorry," Victoire apologized. "I'm sure butterflies are very frightening."
"They are," Teddy agreed seriously.
Victoire laughed. "Alright, go ahead," she prompted him.
"Right," Teddy said. "Okay, truth or dare?"
"Dare," Victoire decided, since nobody had picked dare yet. Also she didn't really want Teddy to turn her last question around on her.
"Hmm," Teddy mused. "I dare you to... come to Defence with me tomorrow."
"But I have my own classes," Victoire pointed out.
"Come on," Teddy insisted. "It's not like you'll miss anything. Besides, I want to see how long it'll take Professor Derlid to realize you're not in my class."
"I'll get in trouble," Victoire insisted.
"No you won't," Teddy assured her.
Victoire hesitated. "What period is it?" she asked.
"First," Teddy replied.
"I have Charms," Victoire said. "I can't miss Charms. I'm terrible at Charms. If I miss the class, I'll never catch up."
"You'll probably miss like, ten minutes of Charms," Teddy pointed out. "And I'll help you catch up."
"I don't know…" Victoire muttered.
"What happens if you refuse a dare?" Teddy asked.
"You don't," Victoire replied simply.
"Well then I guess I have my answer," Teddy smirked.
Victoire rolled her eyes. "Fine," she allowed. "I'll go to Defence with you tomorrow. But keep in mind that dares are meant to be immediate."
"Okay," Teddy said. "Next time I'll come up with something else."
"So there's going to be a next time?" Victoire asked.
Teddy shrugged. "Maybe," he replied.
Victoire and Teddy stayed up much later than Victoire had intended to. She'd meant to head to bed around nine, but they were having too much fun that she didn't want to leave. Eventually though, Victoire started nodding off on Teddy's shoulder and he suggested that they call it a night.
"I'm not tired," Victoire protested with a yawn.
Teddy chuckled. "Clearly you are," he said. "Go on."
Teddy lifted Victoire up and propelled her towards the girls' staircase.
"I'll see you in Defence tomorrow," he added.
"Okay," Victoire replied, too tired to come up with a witty retort.