Mary collapsed into Sams bed once more, clinging hard to the sheets as Millie curled into her side and Dean left the room long enough to get rid of the lockdown and call Sam to let him know where they were.

"Mama?" Millie asked, nudging at her slightly. It took Mary a moment but she managed to turn her head to look at her daughter.

"Yes baby?" she somehow got out, taking a deep breath.

Millie stared at her with John's eyes, and that realization made a shot of pain go through her chest. "Okay?" she asked, her thumb going back into her mouth.

Mary nodded, turning her body a bit more so that she could curl around and towards Millie. "I'm okay." she whispered. "Just...really tired."

Millie nodded importantly at that, thumb still in her mouth. "Nap?"

Nap. Nap sounded really good at this time. Mary gave a small nod and reached for her daughter, Millie eagerly cuddled up to her, curling into her chest as much as she could.

Mary's hand came to stroke at Millies head, her fingers sliding along her hair. Slowly her mind started to try to categorize Millie as best as she could.

She seemed like she was three, maybe four years old at the most now. She knew who Mary was and she seemed to either know who Dean was or at least knew to help him.

She was also powerful enough to destroy Michael and save Dean from whatever had happened to him during the attack.

That was worrisome, more to the point was how much older she was at the moment and how much she was skipping. Mary wanted to be selfish and have her baby, watch her grow up a normal pace that she hadn't been able to with Sam and Dean but now, like always, that opportunity was taken from her.

Mary felt the tears start to gather in her eyes and she curled more around her daughter, just holding onto her.

Why couldn't she have these things? Was it that selfish that she needed to be punished for it in some way?

She started when she felt small hands on her face and she looked up, seeing Millie staring at her. Her daughter was quiet for a few moments before she leaned in and kissed her cheek softly.

"Okay." Millie told her. "'s okay mama."

Mary blinked and then smiled, leaning in to kiss the top of her head.

"I know, it's okay." she whispered. "It's going to be okay."

Millie nodded again and curled into her again, nuzzling a bit more against her.

Mary relaxed a bit more, barely moving when the door opened. She slightly brought her head up enough to see Dean was standing there awkwardly in the doorframe.

"Called Sam." Dean said softly, not wanting to disrupt either of them. "He's on his way here, breaking every road law."

Mary breathed out a laugh, her eyes closing against her will. "Sounds like him." she murmured.

Dean seemed to hesitate but then she heard him come into the room, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry." he whispered.

"Nothing to be sorry for." Mary mumbled, trying to stay awake. "You didn't do anything wrong Dean."

"Michael was here because of me and because I said yes." Dean started to say, stopping when Mary reached out aimlessly and smacked his leg with the back of her hand.

"Stop, stop it." she mumbled. "You said yes to save Sam and whatever happened after that is not your fault. You wanted to save your brother and that's what counts."

She could tell that Dean wanted to argue but at the same time he wanted to let her sleep.

"Okay mom." he said, reaching for her hand and holding onto it.

Mary squeezed his hand back as best as she could. "Wake me when Sammys here." she mumbled. She didn't hear what Dean said, falling deep asleep, holding onto him and Millie.

I do not own Supernatural.

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