LEXA | ALICIA

We wake up in each other's arms. Just like we did the other three times we woke up this night. But this time, unlike all previous moments, we don't lose ourselves in passionate kisses and endless lovemaking.

Morning has come.

I blink against the bright light that enters through the small skylight. With my cheek still resting on her chest, the steady beat of her heart underneath my ear more comforting than anything else, I can feel how she softly presses her lips on top of my head.

A smile creeps on my face, the subtle graze of my lips against her bare skin giving me away, and making her chuckle.

"What?"

"Nothing," I mumble.

She gently lifts my chin with her forefinger, making me look up at her. Her brows draw together as she narrows her eyes.

"Nothing?" she echoes. "With you it's never nothing."

I mirror her grin, then lower my head again, as I'm already missing her warmth.

"Some things are better left unsaid," I hum. "So the universe can't screw it up. You know, start throwing curve balls."

Clarke starts raking her fingers through my hair. "You really believe the universe has ears?"

"I wouldn't be surprised," I shrug.

With her hand still gently stroking me, she seems to give it some thought, before resolutely breaking our silence.

"Well, I don't care! I'm just gonna say it anyway. I'm happy. Right now, I'm happy. You make me happy," she goes on. "And yes, I know there's a whole lot of scary shit around the corner. I know a future can be over before it begins. Boy, do I know! But if it taught me one thing, it is to really live in those moments that matter. To really feel them, and acknowledge them. Savor and cherish them. Cause in a world like this, moments count."

Lost for words, I can only stare at her. I know she's right. I'm just... not there yet.

And Clarke knows.

As she suddenly rolls us over so I'm on my back, with her hovering over me, she brushes a lock of hair off my forehead and looks deeply into my eyes. "You feel it, don't you? Here," her hand moves to my heart, then to my stomach, "and here?"

I just nod.

Her smile returns. "Good. Then, with your approval, I'll say it for you."

I nod again.

"You are happy, too. You are. And you're allowed to be. You deserve to be. Whatever happened. And whatever will happen next." She leans in to kiss me, tenderly, before continuing with her lips still close to mine, "This night was ours - ours alone. So is this moment. No bullet, no sword, no death can take that away from us."

She kisses me again and this time I don't give her the chance to get away. Pulling her closer I deepen our kiss, savoring the moment like she told me to. When we do break apart, our eyes lock again. That's when I finally find my voice back. Kind of, at least.

Breathlessly I whisper, "I love you, Clarke Griffin."

Her beaming smile makes me gasp for air.

She slowly brings her hand to my face and strokes my cheekbone with the tip of her finger. "I love you, Lexa kom Trikru," she softly breathes, while she reaches my jawline and starts following its contours, her thumb now grazing over my lips ever so lightly. "And I love you, Alicia-"

She abruptly falls quiet.

"Clark," I help her out, with little success as I make her look even more confused instead.

"Yes?"

"No, not you. Me!" I giggle - highly aware that I'm ruining the moment right now. "Alicia Clark, that's my name."

For a few seconds she just stares at me. Then she cracks up laughing. "Are you kidding me?"

"I wish I was," I snort as well, and with that we're ready to leave the sentiment behind us for now and start this brand new day. Still shaking her head in amazement Clarke sits up.

"Let's find Luna. See how she's doing, and make a plan for today."

I follow her example and look around, absorbing the mess we made last night.

"How did she take it?" I ask.

"Not well," she sighs as she leaves the blankets that make our bed - or what's left of it - and starts dressing herself. I know I should do the same, but right now I'd rather watch her. "She wasn't too happy remembering herself. Even less remembering us."

"She's angry?"

Clarke doesn't get the chance to answer. A sudden, rhythmic knocking makes us both look at the door, though she noticeably less startled than me.

"Madi," she deduces, "I taught her how to tell me her name in morse code."

She stoops, picks up my clothes from the floor and tosses them at me. Without leaving my spot I quickly put on my panties and shirt, then pull the sheet over my bare legs since Clarke is already opening the door. It's not Madi though.

Luna steps in, raising her hands in some reassuring white flag kind of gesture, or just an apology maybe, since the entire scene doesn't leave much to the imagination. She quickly closes the door behind her.

"Madi told me where to find you, and how to get in," she explains. "Some kid you got there!"

Clarke flashes a grin. "She sure is something. How's Yumiko?"

Luna shows her a weak smile - the first one I'm witnessing, I realize, at least in this lifetime. "She's alright. She can't really walk yet, but it looks like she'll be fine."

Clearly relieved, Clarke exhales and relaxes her shoulders. "Great. Now let's make a plan-"

"We already have a plan," Luna interrupts her, "We're going home. Today!"

"You just said she can't walk yet," I frown.

"That's right. That's why you and I are going to find us a car." She turns to Clarke without waiting for my response. "I want you to stay with Miko, prepare her for the trip."

I jump up, drawing her attention again. "Why should we look for a car? There's not a drop of gasoline left on this entire planet!"

"Well, luckily for us, our new friends brought a whole new stock from outer space. Madi gave us two cans - two gallons of liquid gold to bring us home," she refutes my point as she looks at me again, her eyes now on my legs. "So chop-chop, lover girl, put on your pants. We've got an appointment at the dealership!"

Unable to keep from laughing I shake my head. "You haven't changed a bit, have you?"

She glances at Clarke, then back at me. She doesn't join my laughter. "I have, actually, and you should be glad about that," she grumbles. "Now, come on, we don't have all day."

I swiftly put on the rest of my clothes, kiss Clarke goodbye and follow Luna outside. There are two cans of gasoline at the door. She picks them up, shoves one in my hands and disappears between the trees without waiting for me. I quickly run after her.

"Luna, wait!"

"Magna," she replies without slowing down. When I'm almost caught up with her, she looks at me over her shoulder. "Luna is dead. Let's leave her there."

A sorrowful sigh escapes me. "I get it. Clarke told me what happened. But..." I lay my hand on her shoulder, yet she shakes it off like it's burning her.

"But nothing! You wanna cling on to the past? Fine, your choice. But I won't." Without blinking she draws her knife and stabs a legless Walker that's blocking our way. As soon as she pierces his skull, silence returns - with the exception of the soft rustle of the wind in the trees. "Bringing the dead back to life has done no one any good. I'm not gonna add one to it."

I look at the gross puddle of human brains at my feet. The days that this made me hurl are far behind me. Still, it's not a pretty sight.

"Please, don't compare yourself with... them," I sigh.

Luna - or Magna, I correct myself - steps over the mutilated half-body on the ground and continues her way. I rush to keep up with her.

"Listen, I know things are different for you. That you've got people from back then to hang on to," she says as soon as I'm next to her again, her voice a little milder now. "I don't blame you for that. Just don't ask me to do the same."

We reach the main road and keep following it for a few minutes in silence, before I turn my head to look at her again. "You're not going to help us, are you?"

"What makes you think that?"

"Because you're mad," I raise my shoulders in some half-shrug. "I don't know exactly what happened between you and them, but you seem to have quite some reasons to hate their guts."

Magna moves the heavy can from one hand to the other and wipes her hair from her face. "You're right. They hardly deserve my help. Let alone my forgiveness."

"And with Clarke being one of them...?" Afraid of the answer, I don't finish my question.

She stops walking in the middle of the road, taking me by surprise by the abruptness. "Clarke is with you," she states the obvious. "And you- well, you are you. You and I grew up together. We were both doomed by our blood. Killing my brother was the worst thing I ever had to do, but I knew that killing my sister would top that."

I stay quiet, let her talk.

"We never saw each other again after I fled. But I had my spies in Polis. I heard what I needed to hear. You were the one who refused to track me down. You let me live. Don't think I ever forgot about that!"

"Well, except for the last hundred and thirty years," I blurt out chuckling. Regretting it straight away I'm about to bite my tongue, but then I see that I don't have to: I actually made her laugh!

"Well, yeah, except for that," she smirks.

I raise my brows. "So, you're saying what? That I'm important to you?"

"Believe me or not, but yeah," she shrugs. "You are."

"Not as important as Raven, though?" I wink.

The palm of her hand hits my shoulder before I can dive to avoid it, making me stumble backwards. "Shut up," she grumbles, "How was I supposed to recognize you? You aren't exactly twelve anymore!"

"Yeah, let's leave it at that," I laugh as I start walking again, having her following me for a change, albeit just for a second. "And hey, there must have been some recognition, right? During that fight yesterday?"

"That was some long-lost routine, indeed!" she smiles at the recollection.

I open my mouth, about to point out that our past really wasn't all that bad, but I change my mind as I don't want to push it. Besides, we need to get back to business as we just happen to find a car on the roadside, its key still in the ignition. Of course it doesn't work.

We use about half of a can to see if it solves the problem, which it does, before filling it up with the rest of the gas. With Magna behind the wheel and me in the passenger seat we make our way back to Madi's camp.

"You haven't answered my question yet," I remind her when we're almost there.

She turns her head. "You want to know if I'm going to help you?"

"Yes. Me and Clarke?"

"I am," she nods, "You and Clarke. And the kid, if she wants any help. I mean, she was just out of diapers when this whole thing was happening. Can't really blame her for anything."

"How about Raven?" I can't help but tease, drawing a deep sigh from her.

"You really can't stop, can you?" she murmurs, before briefly looking at me once more. She takes in a long breath. "Okay, fine, whatever. If she'd ever be in need, yes, I'll help her, too. Of course I would... But the rest of them can rot in hell!"

I answer her grumpy face with a playful grin. "Fair enough," I nod. "Now, let's return to the present. There are some people waiting for us!"

Magna stops the car. From here it should be less than a mile, which we'll have to walk.

We do so without facing any problems and before we know it we're back at the glade. When Magna crosses it to get the others, my mind wanders off to the day of our conclave. The day she ran away. What if she hadn't? Would I have fought her? Killed her when I got the chance? I probably would. Even though she was my friend - my family. I would have done it, cause nothing was more frightening than not doing it.

They called her a coward, but the truth is I wasn't half as brave as she was.

And now she's about to save me again.

Sooner than I'd expected the three of them show up, with Yumiko leaning on Clarke and Magna for support.

"No Madi?" I carefully ask.

Clarke shakes her head with sorrow in her eyes. I don't ask any further.

The car is waiting where we left it. This time Magna climbs in the back, together with Yumiko, who rests her head on Magna's lap. I dangle the keys in the air.

"You got your license?"

Clarke forces a smile. "Just years of experience in a 4x4. It's okay, you drive."

The drive back to Hilltop, as we learn the settlement is called, takes about an hour. We don't talk much. Clarke keeps staring out of the window, her face clouded with sadness. I rest my hand on her knee and she covers it with hers, telling me without any words that it isn't me. I wish it was though. Then at least I could do something to make her feel better...

"You two wait here," Magna speaks up when I stop the car in front of the gate. "I'll try to find our leaders, ask them to come and talk to you. Come on, babe."

She helps Yumiko out of the car and through the gate, while Clarke and I get out as well and take a seat on the hood. I look to my side.

"You're okay?"

"Not really," Clarke sighs, before looking back at me. She bites her lip and I can tell she's trying to smile again. "But I will be."

I caress her back. "We're not giving up. You hear me? Her home is with you."

"With us," she corrects me.

Smiling for the two of us, I nod. "With us. And it's going to be right there."

She follows my gaze to the closed gate. The gate that's between us and our future.

"You think it's gonna work? She's gonna help us?"

I cock my head. "I think she's gonna try. Let's hope that will be enough."

Right then the gate opens again. Magna walks towards us, together with the woman we met two days ago. Tara, if I remember correctly. When they're getting closer they slow down, both looking over their shoulder to the man who apparently came along with them, but now lingers at the gate. He doesn't move. Instead, he just stares at us.

"Jesus, come on, let's just hear them out," Tara tells him.

It gets him in motion, but not for long. After only five steps, he stops again.

"I'm not talking to her," he states, his voice cold and determined.

His eyes are on me. There's no doubt about that. But why? Have we met before?

I don't recognize him, even though he has quite a striking appearance. He has a full beard, and long, light-brown hair, tied in a knot. He looks strong. Not so much muscular, but athletic. I reckon he's around thirty, thirty-five maybe. I can't imagine we shared the playground together.

He takes another step forward. "She doesn't get anything from me," he tells Tara, before looking straight at me again. "You took enough already!"

My mind keeps racing. He doesn't seem like someone I'd easily forget. Then again, I met so many people these past few years, it would be a miracle if I'd remembered them all. Maybe it was in Mexico, at the hotel. Or in Texas, at the stadium? Or at the dam perhaps?

Catching us all off guard he suddenly closes the distance between us, until he's only two feet away from me. Without blinking, his eyes are peering into mine.

"You have know idea, do you?"

"I- I don't," I stammer, "You're sure we know each other?"

"Oh, I'm sure," he slowly bobs his head. "Maybe you should dig a little deeper... Heda!? "

... ...