Awareness returned to Izaya slowly.
It was like a mudslide. As he began to awaken, the pain seemed to come back with it. He felt a throbbing all over, his eyelids as heavy as lead. For a few moments, he lay there confused. Izaya had no clue where he was. Or what happened. He racked his sluggish brain for answers.. But he couldn't seem to remember exactly what..
Suddenly, it came to him.
HARU!
His eye snapped open, jerking into a sitting position, only to cry out as intense pain exploded throughout his body, his whole world blurring out. He flopped back down, wearily blinking as his red eyes flickered around..
Where am I?! Izaya frantically thought. He slid his arm up, forcing himself to sit up again. He ignored his confusion and the pain, throwing it aside for what was the most important question.
"Haru..?" He whispered,"H-Haru?!" But no response came, and there was no crib in sight. His heart clenched in terror. Where is my son!? Where is he?!
"Haru!" Izaya croaked louder, his throat feeling like someone was rubbing sandpaper on it every time he spoke. His breath suddenly caught when he went to yell again, head spinning as he leaned over, coughing violently. His stomach lurched, and suddenly he began to throw up the small amount of food that was in his stomach.
A loud whimper escaped the wheezing young man. Everything hurt, everything was burning. He just wanted it all to go away.
The sound of a door slamming open made the raven jump, adrenaline flying through him again as he lifted his head. Instead of seeing his attacker, though, he saw a very familiar headless figure. The breath he didn't realize he had been holding was instantly released. He didn't relax, though, he still didn't know where his son was.
Celty's shoulders instantly slumped in relief, before she quickly rushed over to his side, pulling the soiled blanket off of him. She then grabbed water from the side table, moving to bring it to his mouth. Izaya growled in frustration. He didn't want help, he didn't need help. He needed Haru.
He jerked his head away, causing Celty to spill a bit of the water. She hesitated, before grabbing his face and gently trying to coax the raven to drink it. Izaya jerked his head again, using his left hand to slap the cup aside. Celty jumped again, before turning to him with what seemed like frustration.
Izaya didn't back down, starring firmly at her but unable to hide the fear within his eyes. "Haru.." He croaked,"Where's Haru!?"
Celty's anger seemed to fade away, realizing exactly why the raven was panicking. She moved, placing her pale hand on his shoulder in a comforting way before she left the room, leaving the door open behind her.
An eternity passed for the raven, leaving his fear simmering just enough to rise again. He knew he could only see out of one eye, and that the heavy cast would slow him down, but he was prepared to rip out his IV and bear the pain if it meant finding Haru.
Just as his weak, shaking hand was about to grab the tube in his arms, he heard a shrill cry. Adrenaline jerked through him again, his mind flashing back to what caused Haru's crying the last time. He's in danger! I need to help him!
"Haru!" He cried, wincing at the pain that flew up his throat. In response to his voice, Haru's crying suddenly ceased, before growing even louder.
"Dada!" The baby screeched,"Dada! Dada!" His voice got closer, until Celty came around the corner. The little raven's blue eyes connected to Izaya's, sending the biggest amount of happiness through Izaya that he had ever felt. Tears burned in his red orbs, falling down his cheeks like a waterfall.
Celty moved, and Haru instantly reached out for his father. Izaya did the same, taking the sobbing baby. Haru blubbered loudly, his fists tightening around the fabric of his father's shirt, and burying his sobbing face against his chest.
Izaya released a shuddering breath, holding the child close and pressing kisses all over his head. "You're okay, Haru," He whispered,"We're both okay.. We're safe.. I'll never let you go again."
Celty didn't dare move, not wanting to disturb the beautiful moment she saw before her. The two ravens glowed with relief, happiness, and love. Their bond was so strong, and Celty felt any doubts she had left fade away. Not that there was much left to begin with after what happened. He always seemed afraid of death, but he almost died protecting Haru.. She thought. I wish I could have met this side of him sooner.
A few minutes later, the stressed out baby had fallen asleep on Izaya, who continued to rub the baby's back comfortingly. Celty then took initiative, placing her hand on his shoulder. The bandaged raven jumped a bit, before turning to look up at her. His red eyes were filled with gratitude, and he weakly croaked,"Thank you, Celty."
Celty hid her surprise, and instead moved over to where the refilled water glass was. She then moved over, holding it out cautiously. Izaya chuckled, before reaching out with a pale hand, and taking the drink. He chugged down all the water, his other hand still holding Haru as close as possible.
When he brought the empty glass back down, Celty's PDA was in his face. [Shinra is going to check on you now] She said [He has things to explain.]
The feel of his son within his arms suddenly reminded Izaya that he never told Shinra about Haru. His eye widened, turning to look at Celty. "H-he knows?" He whispered, although in his mind he realized that Celty had no way to hide a six month old baby from her lover.
[Don't worry, he was a little shocked, but he thinks you'll make a great father. You already do.] The Dullahan comfortingly explained [He's just mad you didn't tell him sooner] This declaration caused the raven to lower his head in slight shame, knowing he probably should have told his best friend first.
He nodded, and Celty left the room. Less than a minute later, his lab coat wearing friend appeared. Izaya could feel the awkward tension in the room instantly, as if a million pounds of thick blankets covered them. In a desperate attempt to ease the feeling, he slowly asked,"Surprise?"
Shinra scoffed, rolling his brown eyes as he crossed the room. "This is no laughing matter, Izaya, we almost lost you," He firmly declared,"If you had called Celty any later, you would have died. What happened?!"
Shinra's cold hands began unwrapping some bandages, checking to see if his panic had broken any stitches. Izaya awkwardly whispered,"I got home and someone had broken in, an ex of an old customer. He tried to kill me, and then Haru. I couldn't let him kill my son, Shinra, no matter what."
The underground doctor was shocked by his obvious parental love for the child, although he was still attempting to understand it. He checked the several stab wounds, before he grabbed new bandages. "Izaya, you have to be more careful, even if you had saved Haru, he could have lost you," He whispered,"I would have lost you."
"I know," Izaya whispered, lowering his unbandaged eye to his son. "It was too close, I never want to have to worry that I won't be there to support him. I'm not going to let that happen again."
The doctor raised his eyebrows, realizing what he was saying. "You mean-" He began, stopping himself. "You really would change your life, all for him?"
Izaya looked at Shinra as if he had gone insane, and firmly declared,"When I adopted Haru, I made a promise to take care of him no matter what. If that means leaving Shinjuku and changing jobs, then so be it."
"But where would you go?" Shinra exclaimed, unsure of what plan the raven was formulating.
The raven looked towards him, a smirk coming across his face. "Where's the one place people wouldn't expect me to move?" He questioned.
Shinra's mind wracked for an answer. I don't understand.. He can live anywhere, he has enough money and there's nothing stopping him, he is pretty cautious and that keeps him safe. The thing that's constantly dangerous is Shizuo, but that's only a problem in.. A gasp escaped him, realization filling his whole being.
"Ikebukuro?!" He exclaimed,"Y-you're going to move here?!" The baby began to shuffle a Shinra's voice, causing the brunette to slam his hands over his mouth as to not wake the child. Izaya rocked him a little bit for good measure.
"Yeah, it's the best. Nobody is going to expect me to move here. I'll find a nice apartment, stay quiet, and figure out what to do from there," Izaya softly said,"Once I'm all healed, I'm going to start looking."
Shinra knew Izaya very well, and he could be a stubborn bastard. So, he simply nodded, and moved to the eyepatch. Inside, he was beaming. He always knew Izaya had a heart, and that he had the capacity to change. His dedication to Haru only proved it.
"What.. What happened to my eye?" Izaya suddenly whispered,"I don't remember getting hit there.."
Shinra frowned, feeling his stomach drop. "He slashed it, I'm guessing you didn't feel it because of adrenaline," He awkwardly replied.
Izaya went silent for a few more moments, before asking,"It'll heal, right?"
As he lifted the eyepatch, gazing a the painful scar underneath it, he sadly said,"No.. I'm sorry izaya, but you're never going to see out of that eye again."
At first, Izaya felt despair. He had lost his eye, he'd never see from it again, but he shook it off. "It doesn't matter, I'll get used to it," He explained,"Haru is safe and so am I, that's all that matters." He whispered.
Shinra smiled, warmth filling his heart at the obvious devotion towards the baby. "Don't worry, Izaya, you can stay until you find a new apartment," He declared,"I won't mind at all."
The raven looked a little surprised, before a smile climbed up his face. He returned Shinra's words with a gentle nod, and said,"Thank you Shinra."
The brunette nodded in return, before he began to finish up the exam. The two friends went into a comfortable silence, simply thankful to be around each other, and thankful for the changes that were coming into their lives and themselves.
It would be a little over a week before his many scratches and stab wounds would be healed enough for him to move around without worrying about his stitches ripping, although a few of the deeper ones were still healing. His broken leg still needed longer to heal, but he could move around with crutches, something the raven was very thankful for since it meant he could escape the stuff old cot.
That was what led him to the couch, sitting with Haru in his lap while Celty typed on her PDA. She moved it in front of his face for him to read. [So, any idea on where you're going to move to?] She asked.
"No idea yet," Izaya replied, dangling some plastic keys in front of the baby. Haru's eyes widened with eye, reaching up to grab at them with a toothy grin. "I was thinking somewhere near you two, but smaller than my penthouse. Taking care of Haru will be easier in a smaller home, and I think it would be a better environment for him," He explained,"Plus, being close will make it easy for his auntie Celty and Uncle Shinra to visit."
Celty gasped, hesitating in surprise before shakily pointing at herself, trying to affirm his words. At his nod, smoke billowed out of her neck in happiness, throwing her hands over to hug Izaya's chest. Izaya winced a little from pain, but leaned into the hug. After a few moments, she ynked herself away.
She quickly held out her PDA, smoke flowing in embarrassment. [Sorry, I'm just so excited!] She exclaimed [I never thought I would be an aunt!]
Izaya smiled, opening his mouth to respond when Shinra jumped in. "I know, Celty!" He replied,"I never thought I would be an uncle! And just think, we can experience even more new things we never thought possible by taking on the titles of Daddy and Mo- URGH!"
The keys Izaya had previously been holding were suddenly whipped from his hand, and thrown at Shinra so hard Izaya was surprised that they didn't impale him. The underground doctor stumbled, falling to the ground with a weak groan.
Their theatrics caused Haru to explode into a peal of giggles, clapping his hands and kicking his legs all over. Shinra moved into a sitting position, looking at Haru in amusement. "Oh, you like when Uncle Shinra falls over?" He asked,"Like when I do this? WHoops!"
Shinra theatrically threw himself onto the couch, before bouncing off and crashing to the ground in a flurry of limbs. Haru exploded with laughter, falling onto his back in Izaya's lap with his whole face glowing in glee.
The doctor sat up, beaming from ear to ear at the laughter he pulled from the baby. I can see why Izaya loves him so much. He thought. Even getting a laugh from him is so rewarding.
Haru was panting a bit from his laughing, as his blue orbs turned to look at his dad. "Dada…" He whispered, before a large smile crawled up his face. He raised one hand up, slapping it down on Izaya's chest. Izaya gasped, falling back against the cushions dramatically, sending the baby into another peal of laughter.
He then turned to Celty, practically shivering with excitement as he slammed his little hand onto her shoulder. The Dullahan threw her hands up, falling backwards and allowing herself to roll off of the couch. Haru once again was a fit of giggles, falling backwards into Izaya's waiting hands.
The baby hesitated, before turning to look back at him. Izaya's red eye gazed back lovingly, before lifting the child up. Haru instantly wrapped his arms around the young man, his ocean eyes staring up adorably. "Dada," He whispered softly, making the raven smile and hold him closer.
Shinra and Celty watched the loving moment, before turning to look at each other. They knew that they were thinking the same thing.
I'm glad we get to meet this Izaya.
[So, how do babies learn to talk? When do they begin speaking in sentences?]
Izaya looked up at Celty in confusion. "It's… A little more complicated than that, Celty.." He awkwardly stated, rubbing at his healed skin. No more bandages covered his skin, but there were a few scars that were from the deeper stabs. Izaya didn't mind those, he just wanted his cast to finally be removed, but there was still a little more time.
His time spent with Celty and Shinra was education for all of them, helping Izaya learn more about his friends and what it meant to be human, and Celty was learning all about how humans grew up. It was amazing how many things the Dullahan didn't understand. Her questions ranged from asking what a diaper was to why placing him on Shooter wasn't a good idea.
Celty tilted her helmet curiously, before holding out the new message. [Like. How do humans end up learning to speak? Why do some learn other languages?]
"Well.. Babies learn to speak from repetition. Like, Haru learned Dada because I always refer to myself as 'Dad' around him," He explained,"If Haru had grown up in America, he'd learn English. If he had been raised by wolves, he would bark. He won't really talk very well until after he is eighteen months."
[Could he learn other words right now?] Celty asked curiously, tilting her head even farther, causing Haru to stare at her in confusion from area on the floor.
Izaya nodded, moving to grab his child. "Simple words, yes, but it'll take a lot of repetition for him to understand them enough to say it. I've heard him mumble some things or try to say them, I'm excited to see what his second word will be!" He exclaimed, red eye gleaming excitedly.
Celty moved into a thoughtful position, while Izaya placed the baby in her lap. "Can you watch him? I'm gonna go get his baby food," He asked. Celty nodded her helmet, taking the babbling child into his arms.
Izaya thanked her, before getting his crutches, and leaving the room. Celty watched him go, before she turned to look at the child. He was still babbling, and most of it was not close to understandable. It got the wheels in her non-existent head turning. His second word? She thought curiously. I know what I want his second word to be.
Celty grabbed her PDA, flicking the automated voice on before she typed out a small massage for the child. [Haru] It began, gaining the baby's attention as the second part began. [Say Auntie!]
Haru stared at the PDA silently, taking it all in and making Celty giggle with excitement. She went to play the message again, when a lab coat wearing arm came to stop her. "No, that's not going to be his next word, Celty," Shinra firmly declared.
He practically flew around the couch, kneeling down in front of the baby. "Haru, can you say.. Uncle?" He asked.
Celty gasped in horror, realizing what the man was trying to do. [No!] The robot voice exclaimed [His second word will be Auntie! I met him first!]
"But I knew Izaya longer, and therefore and more closely associated with the Orihara family. So Uncle will be his next word. Uncle, Uncle, Uncle!" Shinra exclaimed.
[Auntie! Haru, say Auntie!] Celty declared competitively, while Shinra exclaimed his displeasure by sounding out every letter of his sentences. Haru simply watched the two adults go back and form, as if he were watching a tennis match.
"Uncle!"
[No, Auntie!]
"No, Uncle!"
[No, Auntie!]
"What in the world is going on?"
The two whipped around, noticing a confused Izaya standing in the doorway. Both adults quickly looked away, their faces turning pink. He narrowed his eye, before realizing what was going on. "Are you guys really.. You're competing over what Haru will say next?" He asked.
Celty pouted, turning away, and showing her PDA to Izaya. [Shinra thinks Haru will say Uncle, but I know he's going to say Auntie! I've spent more time around him!]
Shinra let out a loud laugh. "Very funny, Celty, but we all know the truth," He said in a cocky tone,"Haru will say Uncle first because he loves his uncle more, don't you Haru?"
"No!"
"See? I knew Haru would- WHAT?!"
All three whipped around to face the baby, who was now smiling from ear to ear. His body was quivering with excitement as he threw his hands up and yelled,"No!"
Shinra's mouth opened and closed several times like a fish, while Izaya simply laughed. "It looks like he chose another word to copy!" He exclaimed, red eye glowing with amusement.
The two others slumped, before turning towards each other with a strong wave of competition between them. [One day, we'll find out who wins] Celty declared.
"Yes we will," Shinra sneered.
"No," Haru helpfully added once more.
"What?!"
It was near the end of Izaya's recovery, and he was scrolling through apartment websites while feeding the child. Looking for a new home turned out to be much harder when you were a parent.
"What kind of apartment doesn't allow kids?!" He demanded,"It's outrageous and soulless, that's what it is!" He waved the plastic spoon in anger, before shoving it back into the orange baby food.
[Well, it's near some offices so maybe it's for professional workers only?] Celty suggested. [The website says that children cause too much damage to stay in their apartments]
Izaya scoffed, muttering,"I'll give them some damage to think about.." Shinra, who was cleaning medical equipment nearby, merely rolled his eyes and mouthed 'Mama Bear' to Celty.
Izaya quickly pointed the baby food towards Shinra. "I saw that! Don't make me come over there and-" Before he could finish his sentence, there was the sound of loud knocking on Shinra's door that caused all four of them to jump.
"Oi! Shinra! Open the door!" A gruff, but very familiar voice yelled out, and Izaya felt all his blood run cold. Oh god. I recognize that voice.
Izaya whipped around, grabbing Haru and moving to face Shinra. "Shizuo-" He croaked, just as the knob began to clink back and forth violently. Celty instantly jumped up, lifting Izaya into her arms, dashing into the nearest room she could find.
Just as she did, they could hear the sound of the door being roughly opened. Celty quickly placed the raven down, leaving them alone in the room. Izaya shuddered, holding his son close as he pressed his ear against the door and listened in.
"Shizuo! What happened to you?" Shinra's voice exclaimed, followed by a clinking of metal.
He heard Shizuo grunt, and reply,"Got in a gang fight, some asshole didn't want to pay and thought he could jump us." There was some rustling, before someone stopped. Shizuo was constantly making growling noises, frustrated with something, but it even reached down the hallway. The thought of an angry Shizuo realizing Izaya was right there… It filled him with fear.
The noises outside were starting to make Haru panic, he let out a soft whimper, before scrunching up his face, and starting to cry. Izaya jumped at the noise, moving away from the door to rock the child back and forth. "Shh… It's okay.." He whispered as quietly as possible.
"What was that?" Shizuo grumbled in annoyance,"Why is there a baby here?"
"I'M WATCHING THEM FOR A FRIEND!" Shinra yelled in a panic, and then obviously realizing how loud he had been. "Aaaand… I j-just put them down for a nap.. But obviously they're a bit upset about it.. Kids, right?"
Shizuo didn't respond for a while, before he slowly replied,"Yeah.. I guess?" But he went silent again and dropped the incident, causing Izaya to let out a huge sigh of relief. It was quiet for a few minutes, before he heard some loud sniffing noises that caused the raven to freeze up again.
"Why does it smell so disgusting?" He snarled,"It smells like the fucking flea was here!"
Izaya quickly moved his hands to cover Haru's ears, before continuing to listen. He heard Shinra laugh awkwardly, and say,"W-well, he was here.. B-but he left now! He's gone!"
"Good," Shizuo snarled,"It's been a long day and I don't want to see that bastard right now. He'll make everything worse."
Silence again, before Shinra spoke up again. "Izaya wouldn't want to bother you, Shizuo," He tried,"I know he wouldn't."
"And just where would you get a stupid idea like that?" The blonde snapped, causing Izaya to tense up all over again.
"W-well.. Izaya told me he didn't want to, and he.. He's changed since you last saw him, Shizuo," He replied nervously.
A loud slam rang through the raven's ears before Shizuo yelled,"Bullshit! Izaya just told you that to try and cause trouble!"
"People can change, Shiz-" Shinra began, before getting interrupted.
"Yes, people can, but not a fucking monster like him! No matter what he does, now matter how hard he tries, I know everything he does is a lie. That's all he'll ever be, a lying fucking monster!"
Izaya frowned, lowering his head and slumping against the wall. His heart felt like it was being squeezed and stabbed constantly. It hurt, because Izaya knew part of it was true. It didn't matter what he said, no matter how selfless he became, no one would ever trust him. Because of the horrible things he did in his past… No one will ever see me as anything but a monster.
Shinra eventually finished, and Shizuo left with a grateful thank you. But his words were still resonating within the raven, and everything happy he had been feeling before had faded away with those negative words.
After they were sure Shizuo wasn't going to come back, Celty brought Izaya and Haru back out. The Dullahan patted his back and held out her PDA. [Sorry about that, we weren't expecting him to come over]
Izaya ran a hand through Haru's messy black hair as he quietly replied,"It's okay Celty, thank you for hiding us quickly," He responded. Celty nodded her helmet, before getting up and heading over to Shinra.
The raven watched her go, before lowering his head to his knees. He wanted to voice his worries, let them understand what had upset him, but would they understand? Izaya sighed, pulling the laptop closer on the coffee table to keep apartment hunting when he noticed a notification on the screen. It was an email.
Izaya moved forward, clicking the email and allowing it to open. Inside of it was a simple question. [Are we still doing this?] It read, Izaya wracked his brain in confusion, trying to remember who the email was from.
Suddenly, it came to him. Oh.. The girl from that forum website. One of my suicides.. He realized. At first, he was about to type back and cancel, but the dark feelings that had been squeezing his heart suddenly rose up again. Shizuo said he was a monster.. So why didn't he just act like one? If it made his pain go away, it would all be worth it. He leaned forward, and typed out his reply.
[Sure, when do we want to meet?]