Birds of a Feather Collection
Intimacy
— You fell for him a long time ago. But you know better than to say anything.
Having close relationships wasn't your thing. You liked having your space, your privacy your own time to be alone. You were never the kind that liked to go out to parties or mixers, to school dances, or work outings. Spending time along was always your thing. It was peaceful, simpler.
It did get lonely from time to time. You'd admit that much. Having no one to trust and to talk to about your worries or your accomplishments or simply your day was kind of dull. No one to celebrate with, to cry with, share pains or frustrations with. It boring. Lonely. And it sometimes hurt you to realize just how alone you'd become by choice.
Which is why Hawks' sudden intrusion into your life was so unexpected. Forceful even. But also welcomed.
You liked it, having Hawks as a friend. He didn't care what you said about work or life, or how much you complained about this or that. Honestly he did the same though he was a little less conspicuous about it. Overtime you two shared a space in each other's mind. Nothing romantic–god knows you never imagined him like that–but it was oddly assuring to have him by your side.
His presence gave you a sense of security you seldom felt anywhere. Like you could talk to him about anything and he wouldn't judge, only try to give you advice or feedback to the best of his abilities. And you tried to do the same for him. But it was hard sometimes. The times he shared about himself it sounded rather superficial; something only shared to have something contribute to the conversation. You'd poke at him for more, wanting to know more about him. Most of the times Hawks brushed of those comments like only he could.
He did cave once. About how he felt on being a hero. Hawks told you things you never knew about him, hinted at others you could only imagine from what you got. But you felt proud and most of all special. Proud to have his trust. Special to know that he acknowledged this trust enough to confide in you such feelings.
You liked having Hawks as a friend. It was a special kind of bond that you loved having. You loved having him around.
And then one day you realized you wanted more than just friendship. You wanted him to love. But for as strong as those feelings were, you couldn't say anything. You could tell how much he valued your friendship. You didn't have the guts to risk losing him or the bond you had.
But it slipped sometimes.
"Y/n?"
It took you a moment to realize he was calling you. Humming in response after a moment, you distracted yourself by carding your fingers through the feathers of his wing closest to you. Hawks didn't mind. He said it was calming to feel your hands through them. Because of that, you had no qualm in doing it.
"You spaced out on me there."
"I did?"
"Yeah. Said you needed to tell me something and just…didn't."
"Oh, sorry about that."
"So?"
"So what?"
"What was it?"
You wouldn't tell him. You didn't want to lose him as the close friend he'd become. The only one you had that was close to you.
"Was gonna say that you won't believe what they told me do to at work."
So you didn't.