Chapter 23: Words Around Him

Bucky didn't know what he thought would happen after his small confession, but it turned out to be less than he anticipated. Mika still smiled just as easily, still joked just as often. But to him, there was a huge weight lifted, even if the piece of his past he'd shown her was so small and inconsequential. It was an odd feeling, one that he identified as emotional closeness. He hadn't been close to anyone since 1943. It was kind of liberating.

Besides the emotional closeness, he also could not stop thinking about the physical closeness from their encounter. When was the last time someone hugged him? Probably 1943 again. He could still feel the weight of her arms around him, the warmth of her skin on his. She hadn't shied away from his elevated body temperature, or been scared of touching the spiderweb of scars covering his shoulder. It was a comforting gesture, which surprised him. He'd gone so long without affection from another human being that he assumed he no longer required it for his wellness. But he would need to take that under reconsideration.

Over two weeks had passed since the incident at the warehouse, but the entire area was still roped off for investigation. Bucky still went there every night, hoping that he would be allowed to work again, but each night he was turned away by yellow tape and darkened windows. At this point he wondered if he was, in fact, out of a job. He'd stored enough cash to cover his rent for a couple months, but it would not last forever. His new grocery habits weren't helping either.

Night had just fallen when he began his walk back, the darkness even emptier and quieter than usual. In his pocket, he felt his phone vibrate and heard it ding. Mika had taught him how to text, but he still couldn't figure out how to get the damn thing to stop making noises. He pulled it out, unlocking it to read her message real quick. Turns out that owning a phone meant that she was now able to increase the amount of random invitations she extended towards Bucky. Not that he minded, of course. Since he didn't have to look her in the eye as he responded, he didn't feel as bad about telling her no. Which he did, pretty much every time.

We're going out tonight. If you don't have work, you should come with!

He prepared himself to politely decline, as he had every time for the past couple weeks. But as he walked past the dark church a few blocks from the apartment buildings, he was reminded of a moment like this a few days ago, when he'd been having tea with Father Filip. Jones, I've seen you turn down three invitations from that girl over the past two weeks. Now, do you not like her? He'd asked. Of course Bucky had replied that he did, in fact, like her. After all, she was by far his closest friend. But he didn't see what that had to do with it, and voiced this confusion. Filip had laughed, shaking his head as if Bucky was some clueless teenager. The only advice he'd offered after that was, You're young, Jones. But you won't be young forever. Don't wait until it's too late to live your life the way you want.

Bucky paused on the street as the words echoed through his mind. He'd forgotten that Filip said that. And the old man made a good point. Mika's text still stared at him from the screen, the little blue line blinking as it waited for him to choose his reply. He knew, of course, that everyone must die someday. After all, many people had been led to their deaths by the metal of his hand. But this was different. It felt different, at least. Perhaps it was because he was the farthest removed he'd been from the Soldier, or maybe it was because he had an actual friend. Perhaps the Father was right. He stared at the text long and hard before carefully keying in, Ok.

He let the message sit there for a full minute before thinking fuck it and sending it. Of course, as soon as he'd pressed that little blue arrow, he immediately regretted it. He wished, with every fiber of his being, that he could take it back. What was he thinking, agreeing to go out to a bar? The logistics would be a nightmare, the risk too great. He was perfectly comfortable interacting with Mika, but her initial message implied that her friends would be there as well. And he was sure that her friends were nice. But he didn't know them. And he didn't know the bar. He didn't like not knowing things.

His spiralling thoughts were interrupted by his phone dinging again, Mika's name appearing on the screen. He swiped to open the message: YAY. Leaving in about fifteen minutes. You home?

Well, it was too late now. Mika was emotionally invested. Shit. What was he going to do? He knew that it wasn't a good idea for him to go out. But he also didn't want to see the look of disappointment on her face when he changed his mind. He could go out for a few minutes, probably. He could say hello, order a drink, pay and make his exit. She was usually understanding of his more unique qualities, so he was sure if he left after a short period she wouldn't question it. Part of him was pissed at how anxious he was over this situation, but he was too anxious to let it take up more room in his brain. It took him a moment to remember she had asked him a question, and he carefully typed his response: Not yet. Will wait downstairs.

He could feel his nerves tingling as he kept walking, and not for the first time he found himself wishing it was the dead of winter. The cold always calmed him. The summer heat felt stifling in this nervous state. Mika wasn't downstairs yet when he got back to the building, so he stood against the wall to wait. He ran his metal thumb over the palm of his other hand, trying to distract himself from what was to come. With his enhanced hearing, he could hear her familiar footsteps as she made it down the last few floors. He pushed off the wall as she exited the building, spotting him and giving him a bright smile. She had on makeup, but it wasn't as dramatic as he'd seen before. He liked it.

"I'm so excited you're coming!" she said, putting her hand on his shoulder affectionately for a moment before stepping away and putting space between them. Surprisingly, the friendly gesture seemed to abate his worries for a moment. He took a deep breath, keeping his face neutral as he chose his words.

"I'll try at least." he said. If he was going to make a quick exit tonight, he needed to start setting it up now. That would lessen the surprise for her later, and make her less likely to try and convince him to stay. She shrugged, her hands resting on the strap of her purse as it crossed her chest.

"That's all I can ask." she replied, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. She was fidgeting; was she as nervous as he was? Or just excited, as she'd said earlier? He chose to assume it was the latter.

"You look nice." he observed. It was true - she had on a floral, lacy dress he'd never seen her wear. Granted, he hadn't seen her wear most anything besides leggings and t-shirts. With the tall shoes she was wearing, they stood eye to eye. In fact, she might be a little taller than him now.

"Thank you," she said, giving a little twirl to make the skirt of her dress flutter. "You look like you just came from work. Are you sure you don't want to go change before we go?"

He gave a dry laugh. He had a suspicious feeling that she would be appalled by the variety in his closet, or lack thereof. "It'd just be the same shirt, but a different color." he said, pushing his hands into his pockets. Mika let out a groan, her gaze going heavenward for a moment before she looked back at him.

"One of these days we're going shopping." she said, gesturing with her head to start walking north. She walked rather quickly for how tall her shoes were.

"I'm good." he replied, following her up the street. He wondered which pub they were going to, as there were three this direction that he'd seen in his nightly perimeter checks. She let out an indignant noise.

"Oh, that wasn't a question. I'm telling you, we're going shopping and getting you some real clothes." she said, giving him a pointed look. She seemed very serious. Again, her stubbornness was showing.

"These are perfectly real." he said back, gesturing to his clothing. He knew they weren't spectacular, but that was the point. They were made to be durable and nondescript. He didn't need to stand out. He needed to fade into the background.

"Real old man-like." she sassed, not knowing how deep the truth of her statement was. "Bucky, I say this with all the love in my heart, you dress like my grandfather."

"Sounds like your grandfather was a respectable and practical man." he said, grinning at his own response. He tucked away her comment about the love in her heart, he could unpack that later when he was alone. She crossed her arms, giving him an annoyed look.

"Always have an answer for everything don't you?" she asked lowly, her exasperation evident. He thought she was used to winning exchanges like this. He felt a strange sense of pride for getting the upper hand.

"Only most of the time." he replied, letting out a low chuckle. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"That doesn't change the fact that you dress like you're a hundred years old. We need to get you into something from, you know, this century." she said, and he couldn't help but laugh at her statement. He wanted to tell her that he wasn't one hundred years old, thank you, he was only ninety-six. But he held his tongue, figuring that sort of confession wasn't appropriate for this situation.

"I'll take it into consideration." he finally relented, knowing that he could easily talk himself out of it when the time came. She gave a curt nod, a triumphant grin on her face.

"Good. But it'll have to be another night, cause we're here." she said, pointing to a place up ahead of them. The brick building looked more stately than he thought it would, with an ornate golden knocker on a green door. His nerves, which had calmed with the distraction of walking and conversation, suddenly came screaming back. This was a mistake. He could hear the noise of the crowd inside, the shuffle of people and the low music. "Hey, you okay?"

The sound of Mika's voice cut through the impending panic. She was looking at him with concern in her eyes, her hand gently touching his elbow. He swallowed heavily, looking away from her for a second and clocking the area. One exit, that he could see. Minimal foot traffic right now, though that would probably pick up as the night went on. But he wouldn't be here that long. He looked back to her. She looked very worried now. He didn't want her to worry. That was supposed to be his job. "Yea, yea I'm okay. Just been a long time since I've been out like this." he explained. She gave him an encouraging smile.

"You'll have fun, I promise. We're just hanging out, your specialty." she said, her hand on the door. He took a deep, calming breath. Maybe this wasn't familiar to him, but it was to her. He could follow her lead here. He recalled some of the social etiquettes they'd shocked into him. All else failed, he could figure it out. He just didn't want to have to.

"For sure." he said, lacing his voice with sarcasm. If only she knew how long it took for him to "hang out" without over analyzing every moment. She smiled at him again, patting his arm and pushing the door open. His senses were immediately bombarded. He was overwhelmed with the cacophony of voices and music, the sound of glasses sliding across tables grating to his ears. He focused on Mika, following her to a table in the corner. Good, this one would give him an easier view of the door without being front and center. A group of people greeted her emphatically. There were less people in the pub than he'd anticipated, but still more than he was comfortable with.

"Bucky, this is Jonas, Maria, and Nicolae. And you already know Elena." she introduced him, pointing out her friends in turn. He tried to commit their names to memory; this would definitely be a test later. Elena scooted out of the booth, bouncing up to them. The scent of alcohol floated lightly around her.

"Bucky!" she cried, launching herself onto him and wrapping her arms around him. His initial instinct was to throw her, and he nearly tore the muscles in his back keeping himself still. His right arm went around her waist, holding her steady. He slowly counted his breaths in and out, trying to keep them steady. He must have looked a little panicked, because Mika grabbed her by the hips and pulled her away from him.

"Rude, you hug him before you hug me?" she asked, pulling her friend into a tight embrace. She threw Bucky a wink over her shoulder, holding the hug long enough for Elena to forget her initial mission.

"I can't help it, I wasn't expecting to see him out and about. You know how I am with surprises." Elena said, pulling away and sliding back into the booth next to...Jonas. That was his name. Mika slid in opposite of her, leaving the edge seat for him. She greeted Nicolae with a hug and a kiss on the cheek, settling into the booth seat and immediately taking some food from his plate. Nicolae and Jonas reached across the table to him, offering their hands to shake as they introduced themselves. He willed his face to relax, giving them an easy smile and he responded. This was fine. He could handle this. He'd just have to focus, to make sure his senses didn't get overrun. The conversation, the door, and the farthest corner. Those were his priorities.

"Who surprised you?" another voice came. He'd noted this man walking towards them, and was glad to see he appeared to be a friend. Good, he didn't have to incapacitate someone first thing. He didn't think that would go over well with his new friends.

"Bucky!" Elena explained, gesturing towards him. It took everything in him not to duck his eyes at the attention. Normal people maintained eye contact when they first met. He could do this. He could pretend to be normal.

"This is Alexei." Mika said, introducing them. There was a slight change in the intonation of her voice, as if her throat were a little tighter. This must be her friend that was...not her favorite. Bucky gave him stiff, polite smile, shaking his hand.

"Bucky is Mika's neighbor." Elena stated, as if the explanation carried some sort of weight. Alexei gave a laugh that sounded forced to Bucky.

"That's unfortunate." he said snidely, squeezing into the booth across from them. The rest of her friends seemed okay, but there was something different about this one. If Mika didn't fully trust him, then Bucky sure as hell didn't trust him. Not even a little. Maria leaned across the table, waving towards the bar until she caught the bartender's attention. The man nodded at them, finishing up a few transactions before weaving between the other patrons to their table.

"Gang's all here, huh?" he asked, giving them a warm smile. Mika scooted closer to Bucky, resting her elbow on the back of the booth next to him.

"Plus an extra. Hans, this is my friend Bucky." she said, getting his attention. Hans turned to Bucky, and his jaw went a little slack. At first he was worried that he recognized him as the Winter Soldier, but he didn't have the look of fear that all of his victims did. No, he had a look on his face that he didn't quite understand.

"Holy shit your eyes are so blue." he murmured, making Bucky's eyebrows shoot up toward his hairline. Elena busted out laughing, and the rest of the group joined in. Even Bucky couldn't stop a corner of his mouth from lifting up. Hans was different than the others as well, but in a good way. Something about him seemed more trustworthy somehow. He wondered if that was from his previous life; he remembered frequenting many establishments just like this one. He could always trust a good bartender. Hans grimaced, closing his eyes with a pained look. "Oh God, I said that out loud didn't I?"

"Loud and clear." Nicolae said, still laughing. Hans pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a big breath before facing his audience again.

"Right, well, sorry about that. It's been a long night and apparently I have no filter. Anyway, now that I want to jump out a window, why don't I go get everyone drinks, hm?" he said with a laugh that was clearly fake and covering his chagrin. Bucky didn't understand why he was embarrassed; after all, his eyes were, in fact, blue. And not many people were usually brave enough to look him in the eye.

"Love you, Hans." Jonas cooed, wiggling his fingers as the other man stalked away, weighed down by his shame. Bucky turned to Mika, his brows knit together in confusion.

"He didn't ask what we wanted." he murmured so that only she could hear him. He also wanted to ask why everyone was laughing at his comment about his eyes, but figured he should cover one topic at a time. She gave him a half hearted shrug, as if she didn't really have an answer for him.

"He never does. I've stopped trying to figure it out." she said, as if that wasn't an incredibly alarming statement. Did she not realize that there were mind readers in this world? What if he was one of them? She got distracted by Nicolae's hand on her shoulder, pulling her into a conversation. They spoke with their faces relatively close, closer than usual. Her hand rested casually on his wrist, a familiar touch. Bucky thought it odd, but also figured that it would keep her occupied enough for him to run some reconnaissance. Hans was across the pub, dutifully mixing drinks and interacting with his customers. He did not give off the same dangerous impression that he'd felt with mind readers before. In fact, with his candor and demeanor, he seemed the most trustworthy of the bunch. He would be innocent until proven guilty. The two people in the opposite corner of the booth - Jonas and Maria - were talking animatedly with Elena, who was gesturing wildly with her hands. From context clues, they were discussing a recent movie. He recognized the title from the posters around town, but Mika hadn't chosen it for movie night yet. Despite meeting Elena multiple times before, she still made him uneasy, if only because she didn't seem quite as intuitive as Mika. Alexei was just observing, much like he was. But his eyes kept flicking back to Bucky. He was worried for a moment that he might recognize him, but that wasn't the look he had on his face. He'd seen men with that look before, and it was usually in the same context as his current situation, except usually he had a girl on his arm.

"Okay, here we go." Hans said, arriving back at their table with a tray of drinks. He sat the various glasses down in front of the group, saving Bucky for last. The rest watched, almost holding their breath as they waited to see what was chosen for him. The others had fancy drinks, carefully mixed and poured into their various elaborate glasses. And in front of Bucky, Hans put a simple clay mug filled with black coffee.

"What? Just coffee?" Elena asked, seemingly confused about the choice. He had to admit, coffee was what he wanted most at that moment. Hans gave her a bewildered look.

"Uh, yea? What else?" he replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Which, to the two of them, it was. Yes, he liked Hans. The bartender walked away, going back to his post, and the people around him continued their conversations. Mika tried a few times to include him in this, but his answers were short and cordial. He was having trouble focusing again. The pub was starting to fill now, the volume raising and the air becoming thicker. He took a sip of his coffee, the sharp bitterness helping to cleanse his senses. He was having trouble distinguishing the conversations, and his view of the exit was hit-or-miss with the flow of bodies through the space. He could hear his own heartbeat thumping with the bassline of whatever song was playing. It was getting too crowded. He was getting nervous again. This was a bad idea. This was a bad idea.

"Bucky!" Mika's voice cut through his impending implosion. His eyes snapped to hers, and he willed every fiber of himself to calm down. Or, at least, to appear calm. She looked like she was waiting for him to answer something, but for the life of him he didn't know what it was.

"Sorry, what did I miss?" he asked. Whatever had happened in the conversation the past few minutes, he had no idea. She smiled encouragingly at him, her hand reaching slightly towards him before she pulled it back and settled it in her lap.

"The dart board is open, we're going to go play." she explained, concern creeping into her expression. She opened her mouth to speak again, but Bucky cut her off. He didn't want her to question his current state of wellbeing, because he wouldn't be able to lie to her.

"Okay." he said, sliding out of the booth and immediately moving to avoid another patron. He gave a curt nod and begged his pardon, ducking his head down to hid behind the bill of his baseball cap. Mika slipped out from the booth as well, nodding her head towards the opposite corner of the bar. Nicolae led them through, taking Mika's hand as they tried to thread through the pub. He tried to follow her through the room, but there were a lot of people there now. Too many people. He stopped in the middle of the room as they tried to squeeze past another group, but he couldn't bring himself continue their path. The walls felt like they were closing in on him. He needed to go. Now.

Without a second thought, he pushed through the crowd and to the door. The street was (miraculously) nearly empty, and the heat had faded since the sun went down. He pushed his hands into his pockets, trying to calm his racing heart. He turned towards the apartments, taking off with long strides. But he barely passed the edge of the building before he stopped. He couldn't just leave Mika with no explanation. But he couldn't go back in there either. He thought he'd done very well for his first night out, but it was time for it to end. He took a few paces back and forth before just stopping, leaning his back against the brick of the building and letting his head fall back for a moment. He took slow, even breaths, trying to remember the counting from yoga. He couldn't leave, but he could wait.

Footsteps sounded on the sidewalk, but they weren't Mika's. He lowered his head, glancing out from under his cap. A young woman was walking towards him, the clack-clack-clack of her sandals announcing her arrival. She had a floral shawl that was fluttering in the breeze, and her face looked as if she fancied herself in another place. Under the warm light of the street lamps, he couldn't tell if her hair was blonde or silver, but her eyes were definitely green. And they were looking right at him. He shifted his feet, preparing to fight and flee. No one looked at him like that without having an ulterior motive. His muscles buzzed as she continued towards him, time seeming to slow down. His breaths were calm now. Fighting was something familiar. Fighting didn't scare him. She stopped a few feet away from him, reaching into her pocket. He pulled his metal arm from his, the fingers curling and uncurling as his nerves lit on fire.

But she didn't pull out a gun, or a knife, or a baton. She just pulled out a carton of cigarettes, removing one with her pink painted lips before offering the box to him.

"You look like you could use one." she said, gesturing with the box again. Bucky didn't know what to do, and found himself carefully reaching out and plucking one from its place. He couldn't remember the last time he'd smoked a cigarette. She leaned against the wall next to him, fishing a lighter from her pocket and lighting up before returning it to its place. She didn't offer it to him, which was curious. He put the unlit cigarette between his lips anyways, the weight of it familiar. He didn't really care to smoke it, even though it would have no ill effect on him.

"Uh, thanks." he said, remembering his manners. His lips held onto it as he spoke, the skill returning instantly. Seemed old habits ran deep. The girl took a long drag from hers, the smoke billowing away as she tilted her face skyward and blew. The breeze took the cloud away from him, but he still caught the familiar scent of tobacco. He could taste it ever so slightly on his tongue, despite his not being lit.

"You waiting on someone?" she asked, looking at him with those laser green eyes. Her gaze was slightly unfocused, and Bucky had the feeling that she had partaken in more than just cigarettes tonight. She seemed to be on a different level of existence than he.

"Just needed some air." he said, speaking around the stick in his mouth. He heard his accent change with the habit, and suddenly he understood Mika's comment from the farmer's market. Seemed like the older the habit, the more James Buchanan Barnes came out. The girl nodded appreciatively, humming her agreement.

"Life's a lot sometimes." she said vaguely, as if she were giving a prophecy or a poetry reading. Her cigarette was already halfway gone. Thank goodness, he did not want this conversation to go any longer than it had to.

"True." he said, not knowing how else to respond. What did this girl know about life being a lot? She was just a kid. Granted, most everyone was a kid compared to him. She finally looked away from him, turning her eyes back to the sky.

"So what plagues you, mister? Past, present, or future?" she asked. He didn't like that. She asked too many questions, and was obviously not very predictable. Her disposition reminded him of a fortune teller he'd once encountered, though they did not look at all similar physically. More smoke smoothly slid from her lips. He stayed silent, not wanting to invite more conversation. He wanted her to leave. He supposed he could be the one to make a move, but that would mean leaving Mika behind, which he didn't want to do. He could go back inside...but he didn't want to do that either. "No answer? Must be the past then. The past is always the heaviest. You can't ever forget it. But you can't let it clamp you down. Remember that."

Bucky continued his silence, watching her from the corner of his eye as she dropped the butt of the cigarette to the ground and stomped on it. You can't let it clamp you down. Very unusual wording. His distrust grew. She thanked him for the smoke (which was weird, since she was the one who offered) before gliding away, looking like she felt like she was floating. He watched her as she drifted down the sidewalk, blinking in and out of existence as she passed under the street lamps. As far as interactions with strangers went, this one was by far the most bizarre. Part of him felt like it was a hallucination.

His thoughts were interrupted by the pub door opening, the noises from inside spilling onto the sidewalk. Mika walked out, looking the opposite direction before turning and spotting him against the wall.

"There you are, are you okay?" she asked, concern coloring her face. She walked up to him, crossing her arms over her middle. He wondered if she was stopping herself from reaching out to him. He'd noticed over the past couple weeks that she did that a lot.

"Yea, just needed a second." he said. She came and leaned up against the wall next to him, on the opposite side of the strange girl from a moment ago. She studied his face for a moment before speaking again.

"Those things can kill you, you know." she said, gesturing to his mouth with a grin. He'd forgotten the cigarette was still between his lips. Guess the strange girl wasn't a hallucination then. He lifted one corner of his mouth, amused at her joke. He took it out, eyeing it and turning it between his fingers.

"Couldn't tell you the last time I actually smoked one." he said, wracking his brain for the memory. He didn't think he could recall it even if the whole Hydra thing hadn't happened. She tilted her head to the side.

"You used to smoke?" she asked, curious. He'd realized pretty quickly into his liberated life that smoking was not as commonplace as it used to be, so her surprise wasn't unfounded. He nodded.

"All the time. Everyone did. We didn't know how bad it was." he explained. The last statement may have given too much away, but it was too late to take it back. He flicked the thing into the trash can across from them, the ding echoing through the quiet night. Her eyebrows raised.

"Nice shot. Sure you don't wanna come play darts?" she asked, nodding towards the door. He shook his head.

"I appreciate your invitation tonight. But this sort of thing is…" he recalled the girl's words from earlier, "...a lot, for me."

She gave him an understanding smile, and once again he noticed her gripping the skirt of her dress as if to keep her hands busy. "That's fair. Let me go grab my purse, and we can head home."

"Oh, no, you don't have to-" he didn't want to ruin her night, but she shut down his statement with a look.

"It's not a big deal. Gives me an excuse to go home and binge watch something on Netflix. I'll be right back." she said, turning on her heel and marching back inside. She weaved through the packed pub back to where the darts were, picking up her purse and putting the strap across her body.

"Whoa whoa whoa, where do you think you're going?" Elena asked, putting her arm around her shoulders. Mika slid hers around her waist, laying her head against her shoulder dramatically.

"I'm not feeling well, so I'm going to go on home." she said, giving her most pitiful look. It was a lame excuse, but an effective one. Elena whined dramatically.

"But what about Bucky?" she asked. Mika almost scoffed since her best friend had made her priorities known, but stopped herself. It didn't matter, she was distracted and that was the important thing.

"He's going to walk me home right quick, but I think he may come back out." she fibbed. Elena was quickly transforming into Drunk Elena, and Drunk Elena would forget about this little conversation until approximately two o'clock in the morning. She shrugged, accepting her answer and giving her a rough hug and a wet kiss on the cheek.

"Okay, see you later! Love you bye!" she sang, going back to the group. Mika waved goodbye to the others, sliding up to the bar and handing Hans enough cash to cover her drinks for the evening.

"So, do I have any chance with your new friend?" he asked, giving her a hopeful look. She patted his hand affectionately.

"Sorry, Hans, I don't think so." she said sympathetically. He let out a dramatic sigh.

"Such is life." he said, only looking a little bit sad at her answer. "Have a good night, I'll see you around."

"Bye, Hans." she said, turning and pushing her way through the crowd until she was back outside. Bucky was still waiting for her outside, and he almost seemed surprised when she came back out. "Ready?"

"You sure?" he asked. He seemed hesitant, which she thought was weird. He was very ready to leave a second ago. She nodded.

"Absolutely." she said. Truth be told, she was tired and ready to go to bed. This was the perfect excuse to leave early. She waited for Bucky to push off from the wall before they started walking back towards the apartment. She went to link their arms together, but stopped herself, remembering his personal space and also the face he'd made earlier. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, stuffing his hands in his pockets as they walked home. The summer air was pleasant, and she didn't mind the quiet as they walked down the streets and eventually up the stairs. She leaned against the wall after unlocking her door, giving him an innocent smile. "Would you maybe have a minute to make peppermint tea for me?"

He gave her a sly grin. "What, can't make it yourself?" he asked, pretending he wouldn't even though he'd already put his keys back in pocket. She shrugged.

"It never turns out quite as good as yours. Yours is the best." she said smoothly, giving him her best puppy dog impression. He rolled his eyes at her antics.

"Full of shit." he said, stepping towards her. She smiles, pushing the door open and walking inside. He followed her in, letting out a huff of a laugh as she tossed her purse to the side and kicked off her heels. She hopped onto the kitchen counter, swinging her legs as he started making her tea. She needed a way to get out her nervous energy.

"I'm sorry tonight wasn't very fun." she said, looking down at her hands and picking at her nail polish. He turned, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms.

"No need to apologize. It was fun." he replied. She gave him a knowing look, perfectly aware that he was not being entirely truthful with her. He sighed, accepting that the jig was up. "I can't tell you the last time I went out to a bar. It'll take a little getting used to."

"That's fair." she said, looking back up at him. "Honestly, I'm proud of you for coming at all."

He let out a hmph, shaking his head. "Smartass." he said, pushing off the counter as the kettle began to sing. With his hands busy and his back to her, he seemed to build up enough bravery to ask her, "Is Nicolae your boyfriend?"

"Nicolae?" she asked, letting out a giggle. "No. He was my first friend here in the city. Very much just a friend. Why?"

He turned back to her, the tea set and steeping and his expression reading as if he were trying to solve a confusing math problem. "You two were just very...close. But it seems I'm a little rusty on some social cues."

"You're fine." she said in a reassuring tone. After all, she knew she had a tendency to be a little more friendly than most people. "I've been told I'm a bit overaffectionate with my friends."

His brows furrowed. He'd added another variable to his math problem. "You aren't with me. But we're friends, right?" he asked. He didn't seem hurt, or offended. Only confused. Mika almost dissolved into tears right then and felt like a knife stabbed her heart, but held herself together.

"Of course we're friends. Really good friends. I just didn't want to make you uncomfortable. I know that your space is important to you and I didn't want to do anything to make you uneasy or nervous or..." she over explained. She pressed her lips together, stopping herself from rambling any further and making things worse. She never thought her giving him space would be the issue. He nodded, accepting her explanation, but his expression remained the same. He tilted his head to the side, seeing the problem from a different angle.

"I don't think I'd mind." he finally said, his voice quiet and confident. Mika perked an eyebrow. That was certainly a surprise.

"Really? Cause you didn't see your face when Elena jumped you earlier." she pointed out. He snorted, shaking his head.

"Elena is something else. I don't know her. She's too unpredictable. It's different with you." he replied. He reached behind him, grabbing her tea and handing it to her. She took it gratefully, sipping the hot drink carefully. As per usual, he'd made it perfectly. Damn him.

"You're not wrong." she responded, alluding to the portion of his statement regarding Elena. An idea struck her. She put the mug down on the kitchen counter, sliding off so her feet were on the floor. "Well, only one way to find out. Come here." she continued, holding her arms out. He hesitated for a moment before stepping toward her, letting her arms go around his neck and her chest press against his. He paused for just a moment before allowing his right hand to rest on her upper back and pull her just a little bit closer. He could feel his heart hammering against his sternum. Or was that hers? He couldn't quite differentiate. He let out his breath, relaxing into the embrace. Her skin was warm against his, and the scent of flowers surrounded him. It was just as comforting as it had been the other day. And while he had to make sure not to squeeze too hard with his enhanced strength, he didn't feel like he was going to hurt her. When she pulled away, he felt oddly cold, but neither anxious nor compromised. He felt calm, and comfortable, and in control.

He felt...good.

Thank you thank you thank you to everyone for your fave/follows and especially your reviews! I can't tell you how much it fuels me to hear y'all's thoughts on this story. I know this update took a minute, I'm sorry - a lot of real life issues have been going on. But hopefully things will be a little bit smoother now! I hope y'all liked this installment!

Also for those who have seen Infinity War...don't worry lads, I have a plan.

Oh, and if you want more Mika/Bucky content outside this story, check me out on the tumblr under the username whindsor. There's plenty fun lil one shots there.

-XM