Warning: This entire chapter is a sexual situation. If you're not comfortable with that, I completely understand, and hope you'll join us again for next chapter!
Chapter 41: Birthday Shenanigans, Pt. III (M)
Mika had never been kissed like this in her life.
Bucky was holding her so gently, as if she were the most precious thing in the world, but his kisses were hot and deep and burning with an affection that he hadn't shown. She'd seen glimpses of this from him before, but this was the first time that he'd allowed himself to express it fully. She wanted to let him lead, let him set the pace for their night, but she could feel his fingers flexing ever so slightly on her back, hesitating as he tried to decide whether to take the initiative. She almost wanted to laugh - both of them were stuck in their kisses, not wanting to overstep boundaries, but very much desiring for things to progress. It was just a matter of who was going to make the first move. She thought of all the times he asked before touching her, how he always waited for her permission. And she knew that even if he was the hesitant one, he was leaving it up to her.
Her hands traced from his shoulders to the front of his shirt, grasping it and pulling him with her until her back hit the island. He easily lifted her onto it, and then his grip softened as he pulled away. For a moment, Mika feared that he was going to change his mind. She was almost aching for him, and while she would respect his wishes, she could not deny she would be disappointed.
"Can we go slowly?" he asked, his voice low and raspy since his mouth had gone dry. He didn't want to rush things, he wanted to take his time and commit every bit of this to memory. He was willing to forget everything else in his life, but he wanted to remember this night.
"Of course. As slowly as you need." Mika whispered, smoothing the cotton of his shirt and looking at him with her big brown eyes. His heart leapt at the honesty in her face, and the affection she showed. He reached up, carefully laying his palm against her sternum so he could feel her heart racing. She could have anything she wanted, and she wanted him. He closed the space between them then, his hand going behind her head and his lips gently pressing against hers. This kiss was softer, more tender, telling of the feelings that he couldn't bear to say out loud.
Her hands ran over his chest, her fingertips light on the soft fabric until she reached the hem of it. They were still layered for the last of the winter weather, and she carefully moved underneath the cotton of the henley. He let go of her then, allowing her to pull the shirt up and over his head. The flannel underneath was easier to grasp and bring him back in for another kiss. His touch went to her legs then, sliding up her thighs to her hips. His thumbs toyed underneath the edge of her sweatshirt, and though she could feel the difference between his right and his left, the caress was equally delicate on both sides. He moved them up one inch, then two, and even if she wanted to just rip their clothes off and feel her skin against his, she waited as he slowly tugged it over her head, dropping it unceremoniously to the side and making her giggle. Her laughs were quieted as he once again pressed his lips to hers, this time a little deeper.
Her hands traveled to the buttons of his shirt, pausing for a breath before loosing the first one. When he kept kissing her without hesitation, she slowly undid the next one, and the next one, making her way down until it was completely open, and she was able to run her hands unhindered over his chest. Her fingers found the edges of his scars, and while her initial reaction was to shy away from them, she thought that might make him feel self conscious. She knew he thought his scars were ugly, but to her, they showed exactly how strong he was. She was sure they were a grisly reminder of his past, but she'd never known him without them. To her, they were a part of him. And she loved all of him.
"Should we move somewhere more...comfortable?" Bucky asked quietly, short of breath due to their kissing. Mika grinned, smoothing his hair away from his face. His heart was hammering and his eyes were alert, which usually meant that he had his guard up. But his hands were steady and his gaze sure, and she knew he finally felt confident in himself.
"We can go wherever you want." she replied, resting her arms on his shoulders. Bed, couch, kitchen island - she didn't care, she only wanted him. He gave her his mischievous half smirk, his arm circling her waist as he effortlessly lifted her off the counter. She clung to him with arms and legs, letting out a shriek as he purposely walked to her bedroom, but of course she didn't need to hold on that tight. To him, she was light as a feather.
He set her down next to the bed, and she immediately climbed onto it, standing on her knees and pulling him closer by the open edges of his shirt. She'd seen him shirtless plenty times before, and was this close to him the time she patched him up in the middle of the night, but this was different. Now she was allowed to feel the heat of his skin, the tone of his muscle, and the beat of his pulse as she touched him, her hands sliding over his chest and his shoulders to push the flannel off. It fell onto the floor with a soft thump, and for a moment, he stopped.
"Alright?" Mika asked, just as breathless as he had been moments before. After being close to him for so long, she could see how he was noticing everything, processing everything. Patience, Mika, she told herself. All in due time. She'd waited this long, she could wait a little longer. His thoughts slowed and organized, and soon he was nodding.
"Alright." he said, resting his forehead against hers and putting his hands on her waist. He gave a low chuckle, grinning at her as his fingers tapped against her skin. "Just feeling a little...exposed."
"Well, you know, you don't have to be alone in that." she said pointedly, wondering if he could feel her heartbeat from where his hands were placed on her ribs. He looked so serious, and she couldn't help but think he needed to lighten up a little. Sex was serious, yes, but it was also supposed to be fun. "Though I understand, it's hard undressing in front of someone for the first time."
"I don't mind nudity. The logistics concern me." he said, carefully pulling up the edges of her shirt, but not taking it off completely. "Does that kill the mood?"
"I stopped listening after you said you don't mind nudity." she replied. It was untrue, of course. She listened to every word he ever said. But those were the only ones she wanted to focus on right now. He smirked then, his hands sliding up her ribs and her arms and taking her shirt with them. His eyes grazed over the lacy sight in front of him, his fingertips gently tracing over the edges, touching only the fabric and not her skin.
"You planned for this?" he said quietly, though it came across more as an observation than a question. The black lace shone in the low light from the living room, and dappled shadows appeared for a split second as far away lightning lit up the sky. He finally dragged his eyes back up to hers, an amused look on his face. She laughed breathlessly, biting her tongue and trying not to make another quip about age or pretend virginity.
"I hoped for this." she responded, which was the truth. He didn't need to know that she'd been wearing lingerie every day for the past two weeks, hoping things would go this direction. This was her last set; she'd decided that if tonight didn't happen, then he was just going to have to accept whatever mismatched undergarment set she had on when the desire struck. At least it was her favorite set, one that she'd been saving and had actually never worn for anyone else. Between her statement and the incredible sight in front of him, he found his mouth was suddenly a little dry again. He swallowed, licking his lips in an attempt to regain any dignity at having been floored simply by the vision of his girl in a bra.
"I'll try not to disappoint." he replied, a little surprised at how raspy his voice was. He cleared his throat and tried to drop his gaze from hers, but she stopped him with her hands on his face. Her skin was much warmer than usual, telling of her excitement as much as the sound of her heart.
"We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with." she said, her voice calm and assuring. But she couldn't help but continue confidently with, "But just so we're clear, I want to do everything you are comfortable with."
"Duly noted." he said, his spirit garnered at the encouragement. His hand traced over her hip and up her back, taking in the feel of her skin there as he said, "I would very much like to kiss you."
"Then kiss me." she replied. The give and take, the slow progression of things, was doing nothing more than turning her on further. The kiss he gave her was not the feverish ones they'd started with, nor one of the tender ones he'd given her earlier, but somewhere in between, enough to make her blood boil and her heart race with anticipation. She hooked her fingers onto his belt loops, dragging him with her as she laid back on her bed. He hovered above her, his knees between her thighs and his hands on either side of her shoulders, the metal one clicking quietly as he adjusted his position. His eyes traveled over her again, committing this view to his memory before he settled on top of her, giving a searing kiss once again. She wrapped her legs and arms around him, pulling him flush against her and enjoying being smothered by his warmth.
"Can I kiss you here?" he asked, tracing his lips down to her neck. His breath tickled her skin, and she had to hold back a whine to try and get him to go ahead and kiss her. She bit her lip, shifting against him and shuddering at the friction between them; she couldn't ever remember being this turned on before.
"You can kiss me wherever you want." she said definitively, and he needed no further permission. She pressed her lips together to try and suppress the noise of her response as he pressed his lips to her neck, his beard scratching against her skin and making goosebumps go down her arms. He found the pulse point on her neck, feeling the rate rise as he gently sucked on it. It wasn't enough to leave a mark, but it was enough to make her squeeze his hips with her legs and her fingers dig into his shoulder blade. He touched the clasp of her bra, feeling out exactly how it worked (much simpler than the last time he'd encountered one) before looking up at her with a silent question. But while he just wanted to ask if he could remove it, she thought he was asking something else. "Do you need my help to…"
"Oh, no." he said, easily popping the clasps open with his one hand. But he couldn't deny that he was still hesitant to remove it, somehow still afraid that he was going to do something she didn't like. She pushed the straps down, giving him the assurance to take it off entirely. He couldn't decide if he was in a dream, or if he was simply the luckiest man in the world. He slid a tentative hand up her ribs before taking a soft handful, her eyes fluttering shut at the contact. He pressed a kiss to her sternum. "Anywhere I want?" he asked, referring to her earlier statement.
"Anywhere you want." she reiterated, and he dropped his head to start pressing kisses over the delicate skin in front of him, his tongue tasting the more sensitive areas of her. Her back arched at these ministrations, her hands holding him longer in the places that she preferred. Her legs were fidgeting, moving her hips in an attempt to get some stimulation in other areas. He listened to her silent demands, his hand moving down to her thigh. Before he could verbally ask if this what she wanted, she interrupted with, "Please."
"As you wish." he said, his hand dropping below the waistband of her leggings and making her gasp, her hips moving ever so slightly in time with his motions. He was pleased to find that she was responding very readily to their activities, his certainty in his actions solidifying. While he would still ask, she was making it apparent that she did, in fact, want this. And he did as well. He wondered exactly how much societal norms had changed in the past seventy-five or so years, and decided to test his luck. "Anywhere I want?"
"Anywhere." she breathed, as if she knew what he meant. He removed his hand, instead taking hold of her leggings and kissing his way down her stomach before sitting back on his heels.
"You know, back in my day," he started, slowly peeling off her leggings and underwear. "only certain kinds of people were willing to do specific acts for their partners."
"And were you a certain kind of man?" she asked, not bothering to hide the hope in her tone. He smiled, pressing a kiss to her knees before prying them apart.
"Never understood what was so wrong about making my girl feel good." he said lowly, making her heart skip a beat or two. He kissed her thigh, then a little further up, and a little further up, stopping just short of where she wanted him, only to ask, "Is this something you want?"
"God yes, Bucky please." she said, not caring how desperate she sounded. She was aching for any sort of touch from him. He pressed his lips to her then, and she couldn't stop the moan from escaping her, though she tried to muffle it with a hand over her mouth. It took a few tries for him to remember exactly what he wanted to do, but the noises she made also cued him into what was effective. Again he remembered a time from before he was the Soldier, but found that the taste of her was better than anything he encountered before, and the quiet responses from her practically music to his ears. Her fingers tangled in his hair, and from her lips flowed a stream of curses and gasps, punctuated by his name and the occasional God! or yes. It was and embarrassingly short amount of time before she started feeling the familiar build deep in her stomach, and while she tried to warn him, he already seemed to pick up on it, moving his tongue in a way that made her fall silent and see stars as she reached her peak. Her thighs squeezed his ears tighter than his hands squeezed her hips, his movements unrelenting until she collapsed against the pillows, panting and pushing her hair away from her face.
He couldn't stop himself from smiling as he crawled back up to kiss her, proud that he'd not lost his touch. "Told you I wasn't a virgin." he murmured, making her laugh and hug him close.
"Well it's certainly not the first time you've done that." she replied, kissing him fully and trailing her hands down to his belt. His abs tensed as she did so, but he didn't stop her and she unbuckled it and unbuttoned his jeans. They fell slightly over his hips, but she didn't push them off quite yet, instead returning her hands to his shoulders and guiding him until he was laying on his back, his hands already gripping the sheets in his nerves. Mika noticed, of course, and paused with her hands on his pants. "Alright?"
"Alright." he replied, and she gave him a look that said she didn't believe him. He gave an apprehensive laugh, running his hand through his hair. "Excited, I guess. A little confused."
"Confused? Why confused?" she asked, pulling his jeans off, but leaving his underwear on. She didn't want to move too quickly, and his earlier actions were able to give her a little more patience now. She sat between his knees, her hands running over his legs as she waited for his answer. She could feel the spot on the back of his calf where they'd burned the tattoo from him, but he didn't flinch as she ran her hand over it.
"Just don't remember being on my back very often." he answered honestly, and then it was her turned to be confused. She assumed some things were different than the last time he'd partaken in these activities, but perhaps it was more than she bargained for. She laid against his stomach, looking up at him with her head cocked to the side.
"Well, you can sit if you want. Or stand. Or be on your knees. Whatever suits you, really. I just figured you deserved to relax a little bit." she explained, pressing a kiss to his stomach. She saw the moment as he understood her meaning, his surprise apparent for a split second.
"Oh, you don't have to." he whispered, reaching up to tenderly rub his thumb over her cheek. She furrowed her brows, sitting back on her knees. She'd never, never, had a man tell her she didn't have to.
"And if I want to?" she asked, and she could see his stomach tighten with the visceral reaction the question gave him. He took in a long breath, sitting up so that their faces were close.
"Are you sure?" he questioned, and she remembered his earlier comment about a certain type back in his day. Was that why he was so hesitant?
"Why wouldn't I be?" she persisted, and his eyes dropped as he shrugged. "I mean, if you don't want it, it won't hurt my feelings, I promise."
"I've just…" he paused, trying to figure out exactly what he wanted to say, exactly how he wanted to admit this to her. "It's not something I've experienced before." Besides the obvious state of vulnerability, there was also a concern of the unknown. But would she offer it, if she didn't think he would enjoy it? Her eyebrows shot up at the confession.
"You're telling me, that you would give women the best time of their life, and not a single one felt the desire to return the favor?" she said, shocked at his words. He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck to try and dissipate the warmth there. This was, by far, the most candid he'd been in...perhaps his entire life. She pushed him back onto his back, kissing him and reaching down to palm over him. His body responded readily, and he let out a small noise of surprise and pleasure. "Well nowadays, it's only polite to reciprocate."
"Is it?" he asked, still uncertain, and not wanting her to do anything she didn't want to. She grinned, nodding emphatically.
"Is it so wrong to want to make my boyfriend feel good?" she said with a grin, pressing a kiss to his chest. "Is it something you want to experience?"
He took another deep breath before going with his gut (or perhaps, a little lower) and nodding. She smiled, kissing down his chest as her hands pushed down his boxer-briefs, eventually taking them off completely and leaving him exposed. And while his heart did flutter with nerves for a moment, overall he felt excitement. She put her hand on him first, the sensation leading him to take in a sharp breath. Her movements were slow, careful, steady. She wasn't trying to speed things along, which he was happy for. She wasn't exactly known to be patient, except when it came to him. When he seemed used to that, she leaned forward and took him into her mouth, just a little bit at first, and then a little bit more. He felt like a jolt of electricity traveled through him, but this time in a pleasurable way, as opposed to when he was hit with actual electricity. He blinked away the stars in front of his eyes, his hands gripping her sheets tightly as she did things with her tongue that he never imagined. He thought he might be embarrassed by his reactions to what she was doing, with his toes curling and his chest heaving, but he couldn't focus past the amazing feelings radiating through his body. And from her view, him so blatantly enjoying what was happening was only getting her more eager for what was to come. He had nothing to compare this feeling to from his time before, and he thought that if things went for much longer, then they might not actually make it to the sex part. He sat up and pushed her off, and for a second she looked worried before she realized why he'd stopped her.
"Thoughts?" she asked, moving so that she was straddling him, sitting on his thighs. The smirk on her face told of how proud she was of herself. She pushed his hair back so she could see his piercing blue eyes, waiting for his answer, and he let out another laugh, resting his forehead against hers as he closed his eyes for a second.
"Fucking brilliant, honestly." he said, and she threw her head back in laughter, giving him ample opportunity to kiss her neck again and make her laughter turn into a sigh. His right arm circled around her as he asked, "Do you still want this?"
"Very much so. Do you?" she asked, putting her hands on his cheeks so he was looking at her directly again. He ducked his head for a moment to press a kiss to her chest before returning his eyes to hers.
"I do." he replied. Again, the words that had been plaguing him for the past however many days ran around his head, I love you, I love you, I love you. He laughed in a self-deprecating manner, shaking his head. "I'm not sure how long I'll last, but I very much would like to do this with you, yes."
"It's okay, I probably won't last long either." she replied, biting her lip to prevent herself from rambling about how she loved him, how she wanted him more than anything, how they hadn't even actually had sex yet but it was already the best time of her life. She might have thought before she knew what it was like to be in love with someone, but it wasn't the same as this, wasn't as good as this. She wanted to hold onto him with two hands and never let go. She moved her hips so they were closer together, her arms going around his neck as his hand dropped to her hip, gripping her tightly as she carefully worked them until they were joined. He let out a low groan, and she a high pitched whine at the contact. Just like touching her, holding her, kissing her, this was somehow so much better than it used to be. The sensations were overwhelming, the feel of her skin and the smell of her hair and the sounds she was making as she moved up and down enough to make any thoughts about training or logistics or perimeters completely dissolve. He didn't dare try and hold her with his metal hand right now, not trusting himself to keep control of it.
He could feel as things progressed, bringing back feelings he never thought he'd experience again. Her hand moved between them as she helped herself; normally he would consider that his job, but right now he was doing well just to hold onto her and not completely lose himself at how good everything felt. He tried his best, lasting as long as he possibly could, kissing and nipping at the skin in front of him. Her fingers were digging into his back, and beside the fact that it physically felt amazing to be this close to him, her heart was singing as he leaned into her, as her name tumbled from his lips and into her neck. It wasn't long until she was going over the edge again, tightening around him and holding her breath. That was all he needed for his release to rock through him, his hand firmly moving her hips so they could each ride it out. God, even this was better with her.
After they'd both come down from their high and were left gasping for air, she gave him the softest kiss he'd ever experienced, the perfect ending to the night. She smiled, running her hands over his arms, the metal one cold against the hot skin of her hand. "Alright?"
"'Alright' doesn't even begin to cover it." he said, trying to untangle his hand from the sheets so he could hug her and noticing that a large rip now ran along the side of the bed. "Ah, shit. I tore your sheets. I'm so sorry."
She laughed, much harder than was warranted, before climbing off of him. "That's how you know it was really good." she said, still giggling as she tried to get her legs underneath her. She gave him one last kiss before going to the bathroom, closing the door behind her and leaving him alone in the silence. It suddenly felt cold and quiet now that she wasn't there. He sat on the edge of the bed, getting his breathing and heart under control before picking up his underwear and pulling them back on. Again, his instincts told him to leave. He was clearly too vulnerable, too attached, too compromised. But he took a deep breath, and shoved those feelings down. He had a slice of happiness, and he was not going to waste it.
The bathroom door opened, and he looked up to see Mika sauntering out from it. She was still naked, her hair a complete mess, and the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. She stepped into her underwear as she walked back to him, settling on his thighs and leaning her head against his. The metal arm was still cold against her hand, and she ran it down the forearm before taking his hand and placing it against her sternum, sighing happily at the cool temperature. Bucky sat in awe; that arm had done nothing but harm until he came here, and now Mika was sitting here, unafraid of it, using it to cool herself down. The beat of her heart was just strong enough to register the pressure sensors, and he couldn't help but pull her close to kiss her soundly.
"Thank you for tonight." he said, cradling her close to his chest. She smiled, pressing her lips to his cheek.
"Oh, thank you for tonight." she said with a laugh. She bit her lip for a second before asking, "Will you stay with me tonight?"
"Of course." he said, without thinking about it first. This was the best he'd felt since the day he found out he was drafted, and he was not ready for it to be over. I love you. She smiled brightly then, getting up and going to grab his flannel from the floor. He thought she was going to hand it to him, but instead she slipped her arms into it and did up some of the buttons, and he had to admit it looked much better on her. She bounced on the bed, pulling him back onto it and immediately laying her head on his chest. He put an arm around her, his thumb tracing over her shoulder.
"Hey, Bucky?" she said quietly. He pressed a kiss to her head, his heart leaping at the tone of her voice.
"Yes, Little Bird?" he asked, wondering if she was about to speak the words that had been in his head recently. But somehow he knew she wouldn't, knew that she would let him be the first to say them.
"I really, really care about you." she said instead, hoping that would get her meaning across. She hugged him tightly, and he responded in kind. "Thank you for sharing tonight with me."
"Anything for you." he replied. Part of him knew that this was it, this was the perfect moment to tell her he loved her. But he could already feel her beginning to fall asleep, and he felt like he wanted to just bask in the moment they just shared before taking another step. He could always tell her tomorrow. Or the next day. Or every day after that, as long as she was willing to have him. He settled further into her bed, holding her close with a confidence he hadn't had before. The rain still fell outside, a gentle lullaby from Mother Nature herself.
Somehow, he knew there would be no nightmares tonight.
Hot diggity damn, look at them go! I personally love saucy situations like this, cause it's a good chance to show communication and character growth and relationships building and changing. What did y'all think?
Thank you so much! For the reviews! I'm seriously obsessed with hearing what y'all think of this. And it totally fuels me to get them. Y'all are amazing and I love you.
Also, I'll be posting the prompts eventually! The story will be called "Shiny and Sweet" (cause I think I'm clever) so keep an eye out for it!
Please let me know what you thought of this chapter!
-XM