Chapter 48: Restless Nights

Bucky didn't expect Mika to still be awake when he returned from checking the entirety of the surrounding area. He was nervous at first when he spotted someone sitting on the front steps, but he recognized her by the way she sat curled against the porch post, her hair fluttering in the light breeze and her fingers picking at whatever nail polish she had left. The lights were still on in the house, putting a glow behind her that once again made him feel like he was looking at his own guardian angel. She shifted as he neared, straightening up and smiling as he came to sit down beside her.

"It's late. You should be in bed." he murmured, letting her rest her head against his shoulder. His initial reaction was to put his arm around her, but he was still waiting for the moment when she would realize how dangerous he was. But instead of pulling away, she hugged his arm to her chest, his hand easily coming to rest on her knee.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. Didn't want to go to bed without you." she said softly. It was clear that she was tired, her eyelids heavy and her voice quiet, but here she sat, waiting for him to return. He pressed his lips to the top of her head, breathing in the soft floral scent for the thousandth time. Part of him wondered if this was the last time he would smell it, if he would go to Siberia tomorrow and not make it back. He pushed that thought from his mind; no matter what happened, he had to come back home to her.

"I'll be okay." he said. He wasn't fine now, but he had to hope he would be. Mika believed he could, and she hadn't led him astray yet. She idly rubbed his arm, soaking in his warmth. How he always radiated so much heat, she'd never understand. "Did you mean it? What you said earlier?" he whispered. He hadn't really meant to ask the question out loud, but there it was, hanging between them in the spring night air. She'd never lied to him, but the same part of his brain that told him no one could ever love him also told him that she only said it in the heat of the argument, nothing more.

"I did. I've wanted to tell you for a while, but didn't want to scare you off." she said, perching her chin on his shoulder and looking up at him, her doe eyes shining in the moonlight. His heart was in his throat, and he had to clear it before he could speak again.

"Say it again." he said. He had to hear it at least once more before he believed it. She smiled at him, scooting a little closer to him and quietly saying,

"I love you." Her grin was contagious, and he couldn't stop his own.

"One more time." he said, and she moved so she was completely against him, their faces close.

"I." She kissed his cheek softly. "Love." She kissed the other cheek. "You." She pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, pulling back much too quickly in case the affection was too much for him. He slipped his hand behind her head, pulling her back in for another, deeper kiss.

"I love you too." he said softly, resting his forehead against hers. He still felt it would be safer for her if he didn't come back, but damn if he didn't wish he could just run away with her and forget everything. That wasn't an option, of course. If that asshole was going to wake up the death squad, he had to do everything he could to stop them. For once, he hoped he didn't die trying.

"Come on. Bed time." she said, slowly prying herself away from him. He stayed in place, his hand falling to hers as she moved. She paused, looking at him for a moment before sighing. "You're not coming to bed, are you?" It was technically a question, but she said it like a statement. He shook his head, looking away from her and instead staring at the gravel in front of him.

"Someone needs to keep watch." he said, hoping that would be a good enough excuse. He should have known better than that.

"Bullshit. Steve and Sam can keep watch." she said. Her voice was still quiet and gentle, but stern enough to leave no room for arguments. He pressed his lips together for a moment before finally admitting,

"I'm sure to have a nightmare." He never knew how violently he moved in his sleep, he only knew of the torn sheets he often woke up to. He couldn't bear the idea of hurting her for the third time in two days. She rubbed her thumb over his knuckles, and while he remembered a time that the gesture would make him uncomfortable, now it only felt warm and soothing, especially given the day they had.

"Where will you keep watch?" she asked, her fingers still holding onto his tightly. He looked around them; the cottage only had one story, with one major road nearby. He shrugged.

"Here seems as good a place as any." he replied. She nodded, looking over to one of the windows in the front of the house. Through the curtains, he could just see some of the paintings hanging in the art room.

"Just sit where I can see you, okay?" she asked. She looked sad that he wasn't joining her, and to be honest he wished he could. But the risk was too big tonight. He needed to protect her, in every way.

"Of course." he said. She didn't know that he wanted her within eyesight the entire time as well. She squeezed his fingers, leaning forward to kiss his head again.

"Goodnight, my love." she said quietly, and his heart burned so hotly he thought it might burst.

"Goodnight." he said, watching as she turned and walked into the house. It was much warmer inside than out, but still not as warm as when she got to be wrapped up in Bucky's arms. Sam was asleep on the couch, and the light under Nicoletta's door was dim. Steve sat at the kitchen table, his eyes on the man on the front porch. He looked to her as she walked in; she knew she should go to bed, but she paused to check in with him. She was still on the fence about Sam, but Steve? She knew she could trust him.

"Keeping watch?" Steve asked, fiddling with the empty coffee mug in front of him. Maybe that's what made her trust him; he always seemed to be concerned about Bucky.

"Said he's not going to sleep tonight." she said. She paused, a question on the tip of her tongue. "Were you there? When they found him?"

He nodded. "I got there just before they did. Tried to see if we could avoid all of this." he said, gesturing vaguely around him. He gave a single huff of a laugh. "This must be a lot, for you."

"I mean, I didn't exactly plan to get interrogated by the Black Widow when I got up this morning, but shit happens." she said with a shrug. She was sure she'd have a breakdown about all of this soon, but now was not the time. Steve raised his eyebrows.

"You met Nat?" he asked, genuinely surprised. She realized she had, in fact, forgotten to tell any of them about her brief arrest and great escape.

"Briefly. She um, may have helped me get out of that building?" she said, her statement sounding more like a question. She still felt like she hadn't completely participated in the conversation, and wasn't completely sure she followed the unspoken directions the spy had given her. He lifted one corner of his mouth.

"Sounds like Nat." he said fondly. They descended into silence, Mika still tapping against the chair in a semi-nervous state. She finally let out a breath, making her hands go still.

"Thank you for helping him today. I'll see you in the morning." she said, turning and going before he could respond. The day was starting to catch up with her, and she wanted nothing more than to shower and to sleep. Once she'd rinsed the day away, she crawled into the little bed in the corner, taking a look out the window to see if Bucky was still at his post. He seemed to be looking her direction, and she blew him one last kiss before turning out the light and drifting into a fitful sleep.

A red light flashed through the dark hallway, periodically illuminating its shadows and corners. She was alone on this floor, all the agents gone. And Bucky? Where was Bucky?

She thought she caught a glimpse of him at the end of the hallway, the metal of his arm barely glinting in the low light as someone dragged him around the corner. She didn't dare call out to him, instead taking off into a run. Her legs felt like they were made of lead, and her feet felt like they were dragging through mud. She knew she was faster than this; why couldn't she go faster?

She finally made it to the end of the hallway, but she was still alone. Her heart hammered against her sternum as she looked at the open door leading to the stairwell. That must be where they took Bucky. Her feet were free now, and she moved so fast down the stairs she spent the whole trip down afraid she was about to fall. But that didn't matter, she needed to catch up with them, needed to save him.

She reached the ground floor, but now instead of the office building, she was in the warehouse. On the opposite side of the room, she saw the man dragging Bucky again. She tried to scream, but her voice caught in her throat. She tried to run, but she didn't seem to be getting anywhere. Any time she almost caught up to them, he would disappear around the corner. Once out of sight, she could only hear his sounds of pain as they inflicted whatever torture on him. She couldn't breathe through her fear, and felt like her blood had been replaced with cement. She had to get to him, had to save him - but how could she, when she couldn't move? How could she save him, when she couldn't get to him? She could barely say anything, unable to speak over her heart caught in her throat. She could only get one word out: No. No, no, no-

Movement out of the corner of his eye caught Bucky's attention. At first he was afraid it was someone sneaking into the house, but closer inspection revealed it to be Mika tossing and turning. He watched for a moment, waiting to see if she would settle, but even through the darkness he could see her eyebrows pinching together in stress and her chest heaving as she tried to breathe. He took one last cursory glance around the front yard before standing up, quietly pushing open the front door. Sam sat awake at the kitchen table, Nicoletta across from him, and two mugs between them. She'd gotten up an hour or two before, but Bucky hadn't been able to understand their conversation. He bypassed them and the sleeping Steve on the couch, going instead into the art room, where Mika was still tossing and turning and mumbling in her sleep.

"Mika. Wake up." he said, sitting down on the bed and gently shaking her shoulder. She took a sharp breath as she awoke, her eyes wide with surprise as she tried to figure out where she was and what was going on. Once she caught back up with the present, she let out a groan, covering her face with her hands.

"Fuck. What time is it?" she asked, her hand dropping to his so she could hold it. He felt his heart constrict at the tender touch, once again fighting whether to pull away or to continue to hold it.

"Shortly after five." he said softly, making her groan again. He pressed his lips together for a second before asking, "Were you having a nightmare?"

"Yes, it was horrible." she said, sitting up slowly. He felt his heart descend slightly.

"What was it about?" he continued, fearing what would come out of her mouth next.

"You." she said, sending his heart directly into his shoes. But then she surprised him, draping her arms around him and squeezing him tightly. "They kept taking you away, and I kept running after you, but I couldn't keep up. I couldn't save you."

He had no response. He'd fully prepared himself to hear about a nightmare with the Winter Soldier, fully expected her to dream about nearly getting killed. But no, she'd been worried about him. He put an arm around her and pressed his lips to the top of her head, unable to speak over the surge of emotions in his chest. He had to protect her at all costs, but he knew now that he also had to do everything he could to come back to her.

"I'm okay." he reassured her, unable to speak any louder than a whisper. She hugged him tightly again, burying her face in his neck and just breathing in the scent of him. After sitting out all night, he smelled like the clean air and trees of the country. She wished she could keep it just like this, just like this moment; for a second, she chose to pretend that he wasn't running off somewhere to save the world, that he was just waking her up for another day. But too soon he was pulling away, his hand going to her cheek and lingering for a breath.

"Guess we might as well get up, huh?" she asked as she leaned into his touch, hoping that he would say no, hoping that he would tackle her into the bed and hold her and tell her to go back to sleep. But she knew that would not be the case.

"Might as well." he agreed, his hand trailing down to her arm to hers. She nodded, pulling herself out from the tangle of the blankets and getting up. His eyes traced the length of her legs before he dropped his gaze, looking at his hands as she pulled on some leggings and socks. "Your sister was up when I came in."

"What? She's never up before the sun." she said, shocked at this turn of events. Bucky shrugged; sure he'd never known Nicoletta to get up early, but he hadn't known her that long.

"I suppose housing a couple super soldiers will change things." he said, making her laugh. She opened the door, going across the dark living room to the kitchen. Steve was awake now, helping Sam at the stove with something that smelled pretty good.

"Coffee?" he asked by way of greeting, gesturing at the French press to his left.

"Please." Bucky said. Steve nodded, grabbing a couple more mugs and going to fill them.

"Where's Nicoletta? Bucky said she was awake. I didn't believe it." Mika asked, taking one mug gratefully and going to put sugar and milk in it.

"Nicky? She mentioned something about a shower." Sam said without looking at her, focusing instead on scrambling some eggs. Mika paused the stirring of her coffee.

"'Nicky'?" she asked, the name feeling foreign to her. Sam gave her a confused look.

"Yea. Nicky. Your sister." he responded, not sure why she was reacting the way she was.

"Her name is Nicoletta." she said. Next to her, Bucky and Steve were trying very hard to pretend like they were working on something and certainly not laughing at this interaction.

"I know. It's just a nickname." he explained slowly, his tone making Mika bristle even more.

"You haven't known her long enough for a nickname." she said, her overprotectiveness coming out. Not even Bucky had given her a nickname yet. Sam shrugged.

"Circumstances I guess." he said by way of explanation, not knowing how else to handle it. He kept looking to Bucky and Steve for help, and they kept avoiding his gaze.

"They were up most of the night talking. That might have helped." Steve said lowly, making the whole kitchen stop moving. Sam looked like he was about to offer an excuse, but Mika ignored him, turning on her heel and stomping across the house.

"Nicoletta!" she yelled, her voice even louder in the early morning hour. They could hear Nicoletta respond to her in Romanian, her voice light and teasing as if she knew it would piss Mika off more.

"What did I do?" Sam asked, looking once again at Steve and Bucky.

"She's, uh, very protective of her." he explained, going to help find plates and bowls for the food.

"Told you you'd get in trouble." Steve added. Across the house, they could hear the girls yelling at each other. Eavesdropping wouldn't help, considering they didn't speak the language, but that couldn't stop them from finding other routes.

"What're they saying?" Sam asked as Bucky laughed at something going on in the other room.

"Sure you wanna know?" he asked in return, perking an eyebrow. Sure, the argument wasn't really that bad, but this guy just invited him to mess with him.

"C'mon, man." he said in a tired tone. Bucky bit back a grin, looking at Steve.

"I'm curious too." Steve said. Dammit, no help from him. Bucky sighed, listening to the conversation in the other room.

"Mika's saying it's too dangerous, Nicoletta says that it's not a big deal." he translated loosely. Steve gave a huff of a laugh, almost as if he agreed, but Sam made a face that said he didn't. He stayed quiet, though, waiting for the next lines. Bucky laughed at the next piece. "She says you're too old for her."

"Me? You're like, a hundred!" Sam said, indignant. He was not old, thank you very much.

"Don't worry, Nicoletta made that point." he sighed. He felt a jolt go through him as the conversation turned, and the shock must have registered on his face, because both Sam and Steve looked at him with curious and expectant faces. "Nope, not translating where they've gone to now."

"Seriously?" Sam asked, once again indignant. Bucky shrugged; he didn't care how curious they were, the conversation had turned very personal and he was not about to share that.

"I'll let them tell you if they want." he said, going to plate the food as the sisters finally came back in the kitchen, looking a little salty but overall back in good graces. Nicoletta gave them a bright smile, going and kissing Bucky's cheek before looking at the food.

"Oh good, it's all ready! I'm starving." she said, picking up a plate and going to the table as if she and her sister hadn't been screaming at each other moments before. The boys all looked at each other for a moment and decided collectively not to comment, instead joining her with their own food. It was tense for a few minutes, but the tension melted away as they all tried to pretend that it wasn't an extremely odd and terrifying situation surrounding them. The sun was just coming up over the horizon when Steve's phone buzzed. Everyone grew quiet as he picked it up and stepped away from the table, the air changing as they realized this little bubble of normal was about to pop.

"That was Sharon. We've got to go meet her now if we want our gear." he said, coming back into the kitchen and crossing his arms. He was going back into Captain mode, and the rest would have to follow suit. Sam immediately got up, going to pack what meager things they had and get the details from Steve.

"Then I guess it's time to go." Mika sighed, pushing back from the table. Bucky looked at her seriously.

"You're staying here." he said in Romanian. He thought they talked about this, thought she understood that coming to Germany was one thing, but where he was going now was completely different. She blinked a couple times before responding to him.

"How else is the car going to get back here? How do you plan to get to the airport?" she asked him. "I know I can't go wherever you're going, but I'm at least going to make sure you get off safely."

"I believe you. I also believe that you're going to try and stow away on the plane." he said, giving her a pointed look. She let out a sharp breath, borderline pouting.

"I hate when you figure out my plans." she said in resignation. "Fine, no stowing away. But I am seeing you off. Please at least give me that."

Bucky thought for a long time before relenting. "That's fair." he said, pushing back from the table. Sam and Steve of course had no idea what they said during the exchange, but Nicoletta was gazing at them sadly from across the kitchen. She'd been washing dishes at one point, but now the water was simply running while she looked like she was trying not to cry.

"Please be careful?" she said to him in German, subtly reminding Bucky that she was also very concerned for his well being. His throat constricted tightly; he didn't deserve their affection, but he'd be damned if he let it be in vain.

"Of course." he agreed. He got up and went to her, for once initiating a tight hug. She held onto him dearly, pretending she wasn't crying.

"You better come back. It'll break our hearts if you don't." she said, still speaking so Mika couldn't understand. Mika pressed her lips together to keep her own emotions in check, instead getting up and going to gather the couple things she needed to take with her today.

"I'll do my best." he said. He had to leave it open ended, because he had no idea what they were going to find once they reached Siberia. But he had to be hopeful, if only for the two girls that cared most about him.

"Do better than your best." she said sharply, pulling back to put her hands on his cheeks. The gesture was comforting and familiar, so similar to what her sister did all the time when she wanted to command his attention. "You know I've become very attached to you. You'd be the best brother-in-law ever."

"I'll keep that in mind." he said, laughing to cover up his chagrin. He couldn't even think about such a future right now. They had more important things to deal with. Nicoletta nodded, planting a firm kiss on his cheek before clearing her throat and stepping away.

"Good. Now go...save the world or whatever you're doing." she said. He smiled at her and nodded.

"Thank you, Nicoletta. For everything." he said sincerely. Her eyes filled with tears again, but she blinked them away.

"Of course. Be safe." she said. He turned, spotting Sam and Steve at the door and Mika leaning against the wall, all of them pretending they weren't eavesdropping. Nicoletta stepped past him to go send them off, her arms open wide to engulf both Sam and Steve in an embrace.

"And you be safe as well." she said, holding them in a much closer hug than they were anticipating.

"Yes, ma'am." Sam said, ignoring the way Mika was looking at him as he hugged her sister.

"We'll get them back to you." Steve agreed. Nicoletta patted them both on the back before finally letting them go.

"Good. And you better come visit soon. And bring some of your artwork next time." she said to Steve, making him blush slightly. She pulled Mika into a hug, winking at Sam over her shoulder. Bucky noticed, but chose not to comment, figuring one fight was enough for the morning.

"Thanks for everything, Nicky." Sam added (if only to piss Mika off just a bit) as they opened the door, filing out into the quiet morning. She stepped onto the front porch, arms crossed as she watched them pile into the little blue bug, waving towards the rear view mirror as they drove away.

This time, the drive wasn't awkward. Even if it was just as silent, this time it was because everyone was tense. Mika couldn't help but feel a little ticked, as everyone in the car knew exactly what was going on - except for her. She didn't know who Sharon was, she didn't know where they were going, and she didn't know what the plan was. All she knew was that Bucky was about to be in a lot of danger, and she was going to have to just wait for him to get back.

Turns out, Sharon was the badass blonde that had kind of arrested her. As soon as she stepped out of the Audi, Mika sunk down behind the seat, trying to hide her face. Sam and Bucky both looked at her, trying to figure out what she was doing.

"Alright there?" Sam asked, his face unamused. He was also in soldier mode, but there was something else with it. The best Mika could gather, he didn't like the plan. And he was not trying to hide his feelings at all.

"She, uh, kind of arrested me. And I may have...oh shit, what's the word…" she looked to Bucky, saying the word in Romanian. His eyebrows shot into his hairline.

"'Escaped'? You escaped arrest?" he asked.

"I think I was supposed to?" she said, and while it was supposed to be a statement, it came out as a question.

"The hell does that mean?" Sam asked sharply. Bucky was looking at her intensely as well. Mika looked up to find Sharon staring at the car. She could very clearly see both Mika and Bucky, but made no move towards them.

"I'll tell you later." she said, waving awkwardly to Sharon. The blonde looked confused, turning to talk to Steve. There was still a strained air in the car as they watched the two talk, their gear barely poking out from the trunk. Bucky was methodically rubbing his metal thumb over his palm, shifting ever so slightly in his seat. This was taking too much time, they needed to get on their way, before anyone else found them.

"Can you move your seat up?" he asked Sam, trying to get some sense of space in the tiny car.

"No." he said shortly, which Mika thought was pretty rude. She scooted as far towards the door as possible, trying to give Bucky a little more room as he moved to the middle with a sigh. She was just about to comment how this looked like more than just a brief meet up between colleagues when she saw Captain America straight up kiss the badass secret agent lady. Her jaw dropped, Bucky's eyes grew wide, and a grin split across Sam's face. It was so surreal, that after everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours, he was taking a minute to kiss this woman. The thought was so precious that it made tears well up in Mika's eyes, and she held her hands to her face as Steve looked back at them. She was overemotional about the moment; Sam and Bucky, however, had identical grins as they gave him approving nods.

"Fucking finally." Bucky muttered, laughing to himself at his joke. Mika didn't quite understand the context, but figured Steve wasn't exactly known to be a lady's man.

"You have no idea." Sam added, his tone dry. Steve gathered all their equipment, and the three of them conspicuously watched him as he walked back to the car and put the stuff in the trunk. Sharon spared them one last glance, and Mika felt like she took that moment to stare into her soul before getting back in the Audi and driving away. Steve got back in the car and didn't say anything at first, blatantly ignoring all of their eyes on him as they waited for a response, or an explanation.

"Shut up." was all he said, putting the car in gear. Their laughter was enough to diffuse the tension for a brief moment, and Mika wondered if in another time, another life, they might have all been friends. But then they spotted the sign detailing how many kilometers away the airport was, and reality settled around them again.

Now was when things got tricky.

Yikes! Shit's about to go down!

I'm so sorry for not updating last weekend, y'all. I ended up going out of town short notice, and work has been craaaazy since it's end of the year. This wasn't my fave chapter, but I hope y'all still enjoyed it nonetheless!

Thank you so so so much for all your wonderful reviews! They seriously are so inspiring and bring my cold dead heart back to life. Please let me know what you thought of this chapter! And merry christmas, if you celebrate that sort of thing!

-XM