Oh the Wonder that Awaits (Forever Starts Today)
The day is February 12th, almost 9 months after The Conversation, when it finally hits Jake.
The whole squad is celebrating Holt and Kevin's vows renewal. He's sitting alone at his designated table inside the huge and so beautifully decorated room, sipping a glass of champagne as he watches Amy play with Iggy and Ava. The three of them are moving around on the dancefloor and he has to admit, his wife stilldoesn't know how to dance. Even the young girls seem to do better than her.
Yet it's the most adorable thing he's ever witnessed. They all seem to be having the time of their lives, swirling and giggling loudly. Jake can't help but laugh along with them.
Of course, with all the nieces and nephews and little cousins Amy has, this is definitely not the first time he's seeing her interact with kids. He's been looking at her interacting with them differently for the past months, though – trying to picture her with theirchildren, now that they talked about this very important part of their future they neglected before and she told him she wanted some.
(Minimum two,she said when they talked about it in more depth and Jake agreed. As a single child – at least until he found out about his several half-siblings –, he always wondered what it'd be like, not to be alone with his parents. Maybe life would have been easier if he'd had someone else to share his pain with – someone who would have understood him, going through the exact same trauma.)
Trying to picture himself as a dad too, and figure out if he's fully ready for fatherhood or not.
Amy and the girls stop dancing, waving at him with the biggest smiles on their faces when their eyes meet, melting his heart as he waves back at them with the same beam and he thinks he finally is.
It's not really an epiphany that suddenly occurs to him on the spur of the moment – rather the peak of months of thinking about it.
Still, it's clear to him now: he wants to start a family. With her. Have children of their own to share silly dances with and wave back at with goofy grins. He's sure of it – as certain as he's been on the day he became a cop, asked Amy to marry him, bought an incredibly expensive pair of sneakers. Sure, it's still extremely scary to him – they're going to bring a whole human beinginto the world who didn't choose to be born and who's gonna depend entirely on them, after all – but he learnt it's not such a bad thing.
He knows it only means he'll want to do better for their future child.
And damn right he will.
Suddenly, Jake feels the urge to stand up and join Amy on that dancefloor to tell her all about it, restless energy coursing through his veins. He doesn't need to though, because sheis the one to come back to their table soon enough – it seems like bedtime was coming for the girls and their respective parents took them away from her to tuck them in.
"These girls are so cute," she lets out with a dreamy sigh as she takes a seat next to him and watches Ava and Iggy hugging Holt and Kevin goodnight before sleep.
"They are," he agrees with his smile still bright on his features, looking in the same direction as his wife. She turns around to face him. That's when he blurts it all out. "I think I'm ready."
Amy frowns, looking confused.
"What for? You want to leave too? It's still so early," she retorts.
She doesn't seem to have understood what he meant – which is understandable, in a sense. They haven't talked about it in a while.
Jake chuckles lightly.
"No, not to leave." He brings out a hand from under the table and grabs hers, his gaze now turned soft and loving as he watches her intently. He takes a small breath before further explaining himself. "I wanna start our family. Now. I'm ready."
He sees as Amy's features soften immediately as well at the words. "You are?"
"Mmmhmm. I was watching you with Iggy and Ava and I thought 'I want this – for us'." He shoots her a knowing grin.
It's all it takes for Amy to lean over, breaking the small distance between their bodies and kiss him with her free hand cupping his cheek. Her eyes are shining with pure bliss when they part and they stay close, drowning into each other's eyes as they don't want to let go until something switches in her gaze and she draws away. She searches her purse and takes out a notebook and a pen.
"There's gonna be so much planning to do! We'll need to make binders and lists and read tons of books – I think my parents will let us borrow some…" she rambles excitedly.
Her enthusiasm makes Jake laugh.
"Easy, tiger," he mocks, though inside his heart is melting at the simple thought of getting ready for this new crazy adventure with the love of his life. "We'll have all the time to plan things. But maybe we can keep all of this for tomorrow and tonight we can start by, y'know, simply having sex – I'm still new to this 'wanting a baby' thing but I thinkthis is our best shot at making one?" He raises an eyebrow at her suggestively and this time, it's Amy's turn to chuckle. She lets go of her pen, blushing a little; he can see it starting at the tip of her ears.
(Secretly, he wishes for their future child's blush to look the same – because it's utterly adorable, the way her ears are slowly turning pink before it reaches her cheeks and neck.)
"Sorry, it's just… I'm so excited about this. We're gonna have a baby!"
"I know. I'm really excited too." Jake brings a hand to her cheek and strokes gently with his thumb, a soft smile lighting up his whole face before pressing a small peck on her lips. They're gonna have a baby(or at least start trying) – hearing the words out loud from his wife makes his heart thump with joy in his chest.
"You really are? For realz?" Amy stills asks, though. He can see that behind their shared happiness, there's still some concern hidden inside her eyes.
He's quick to reassure her.
"For realz. I'm as certain I want this as I was on the day I decided I'd ask you to marry me."