Depa POV
When Anakin contacted me about an emergency session, I feared the worse thinking that he had somehow gotten entangled with the Dark Side. But he showed up at my office at 1400 hours with Ahsoka in tow, and I realized that this was not about Anakin at all. Ahsoka looked pale, underweight, tired, and simply defeated. I realized that something had happened to her.
"Come on in," I said.
She and Anakin walked in. Ahsoka slumped down on the couch, and looked like she was about to fall asleep. Anakin sat beside and propped her up against his chest so that she could participate during the session.
I sat down on one of my chairs, and got out my notebook to take notes. "What's going on?" I asked.
"Thanks for squeezing her in," said Anakin, sitting by Ahsoka. "Her husband was going to bring her, but he had maneuvers today."
"Her husband is?"
"Captain Rex Tano under my command," he said.
"Oh, okay." I observed Ahsoka, and she was avoiding my gaze. "Ahsoka, you do not look like you have been taking care of yourself. That's not like you. What's wrong?"
Ahsoka shrugged and looked like she was going to curl up on the couch and go to sleep. She had dark circles under her eyes, and she looked like she could barely keep her head up. She leaned into Anakin and wrapped her arms around her midsection, like she was protecting her baby.
"Snips, can you talk to Master Depa?" asked Anakin.
She shook her head.
"Okay can I explain what is going on?"
She nodded and a tear rolled down her cheek. I used the force to hand her a tissue and she grabbed it.
"She had not been taking care of herself at all really," said Anakin. "Rex has been doing everything, cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping. I have tried to take her out, sparing, meditating, even working in the hanger. Also, Padme's tried shopping and taking her out to lunch. She won't talk, she won't eat, she won't sleep. We don't really know what to do with her, so I thought we would try coming to you."
"Sounds like you have a lot of people worried about you, Ahsoka. Can you talk to me?" I asked.
She shook her head, and picked at the fringed of her Jedi robe.
"You clearly do not want to be here," I said. "Where would you rather be?"
"My bed."
"Why?"
"It's safe."
"What scary out here?"
She said nothing and kept picking at her Jedi robes.
"What happened?" I asked Anakin. "Something started this."
"We went on that damn mission to capture Palpatine, and he hurt her."
"How?"
"He shocked her with force lightning."
"Was there a sexual component?"
"No, but she lost the baby."
"Oh," I said, getting the full picture. "And she has not eaten, or trained, or anything since."
"Yeah," said Anakin.
"Lets see, that mission was almost a month ago."
"Right."
"Has she been like this the whole time. Does she respond to anything?"
"She will answer a direct question, if she hears it. Sometimes you have to get her attention first. But other than that, no. Rex says she will get up at night and flip on the HoloNet, and it will be reruns of the Senate that day, or something that she has no interest in. She will just sit there on the couch and stare at it like a zombie or something. Then, when he asks her about it, she can't even tell him what she is watching."
"Does she pay attention during flying or can she carry out a complicated task?"
"No, I mean she can fly fine, but she can't pay attention or remember where she was going."
"Ahsoka, do you mind if you let Anakin or Rex fly until you can focus? You're not in trouble. The fog will lift soon."
"Fine, okay," said Ahsoka robotically.
"Also," said Depa, "I don't think she can fight like this. She needs to be barred from missions. I will put a medical order to the Council. She can get injured."
"I won't get injured," Ahsoka protested weakly.
"Still, we should not take the chance. I think we should let you rest until you feel better. What you are going through is called depression, and it sounds pretty severe. I can give you some medicine to help, if you want."
"What will it do to me?" she asked.
"Help you want to get up, maybe not make it so hard to be around people."
"Okay, I'll try it."
"Let's start with Zoloft. We will start with 50 mg and then we go all the way up to 200 if we need to."
"Okay."
"She should have been barred from missions to begin with," said Anakin, angrily.
"I know, but women don't stop who we are because we are pregnant. That is not how women work."
"But then she would not be like this," he said. "How do I fix this?"
"You don't," said Ahsoka robotically.
"What's that, Snips?"
"Sometimes Palpatine wins. That's what happened with Order 66, and when he turned you. There was no fix for it. He just won. Those next few years, after I found out that you were Vader, I tried to stop it. I tried to think of things that would turn you back, but I knew in my heart that nothing would work. Like now, there is nothing to do. My baby's just gone."