Mercifully, Teddy's first lesson was not Herbology. He was not yet ready to face Professor Longbottom, for the simple reason that it was not the first time he would do so.
Longbottom had been a friend of the family for over eighteen years. He had been a student with Harry, Ron and Hermione and even in the same house as them (Gryffindor, obviously). For years, Teddy had known him simply as Neville, even Uncle Neville when he was younger. Now he was supposed to treat him just like any other teacher when he knew full well that 'Neville' would not do the same. This was the man who bought Teddy his first mini broom!
Teddy followed the Hufflepuff clump, lead this time by Monty Knox, to the Transfiguration class. They arrived on time for their double lesson, but it seemed their professor had not. The room did not give any air of magic to it, in fact it was silent and barren – more so than the classrooms at his primary school. They were dusty and grey, much darker in the torch light.
That was the one thing the muggle-born children couldn't stop staring at, on account of them floating in mid-air. Teddy was used to seeing such objects in his own house. He picked a desk next to Saffie and slumped down.
'Good, you're all settled in. Go ahead and open your books, I'll be a second.'
The class all spun their heads around, trying to identify where the mystery voice came from.
'It's in the cupboard!' pointed Kathy Thompson.
'You're close, young Miss. I am the cupboard!' replied the voice. 'At least for the time being. Give me a second.'
The antique cupboard began to shudder and crackle, increasing in violence by the second. Dust flew in all directions, followed by splinters and the entire structure collapsed in on itself. In its place a tall man of Indian descent spluttered more dust and brush himself (moderately) clean.
'Welcome to Transfiguration!' exclaimed the man with outstretched arms. The class were stunned silent with open jaws.
The man jumped on his desk with a deafening thud, took a deep breath and directed himself to them once more.
'What you have just witnessed is the incredible potential of the wonderful art that is Transfiguration! I am Professor Viaanvimal, and I will instruct you as best I can the ways of this very art.'
He jumped down from his table and began to walk down the middle of the desks.
'For that is what we are here to create. With our wands as the paintbrush and the world as our canvas we shall create true beauty!'
He took out his wand and began swishing wildly at nothing.
'This guy's a lunatic,' whispered Harvey.
Professor Viaanvimal clearly found it amusing to retaliate by pointing his wand at Harvey's textbook, transfiguring it instantly into a smoke machine. Said smoke machine blasted the poor boy in the face with dried ice. The whole class cackled in delight, even Viaanvimal himself.
'I apologise. I can be awfully mischievous. Old McGonagall has pointed that out on many a surprise inspection. Between you and me, I made this class more fun than she ever did.' He chuckled to himself. 'Alright, let's be fair to the Headmistress. She taught me everything I know. For example, today's lesson! How to turn a match into a needle!'
The class' faces faded.
'Hey, you've got to start somewhere. I can't be teaching you all the good bits in your first year. But now that you are sufficiently tantalised, let's get to business!'
Suffice to say that the ordeal was not a successful one. Even this simplest of all spells proved to be a challenge for the remaining hour and fifty minutes of the lesson. At least Castor and Lennox seemed to make substantial improvement by the end. Teddy left the class with several popped veins from excessive concentration, Viaanvimal's homework assignment and a match with a greyish tint.
'I don't get why you're so annoyed. Lennox was the best out of all of us and even he barely managed it,' denoted Saffie as the pair headed to lunch.
'You wouldn't get it,' snapped Teddy.
'Well, try me. Are we friends or what?'
Teddy sighed. 'Alright, but later. I don't want anyone else knowing.'
'Okay,' shrugged Saffie. 'Let's get some food down you.'
…
Next they had Potions with the Ravenclaws. At least the teacher seemed pretty normal this time. Professor Kadma Hale was an average height lady with her long black hair tied up in a ponytail that reached her lower back. Other than that, she was exceptionally normal in appearance, just as she was in demeanour.
'Many of you will be expecting me to sell you my subject like the other teachers will undoubtedly do. But I remember being in your shoes not too long ago, finding Potions to be a boring, tedious and infuriating practice. No doubt, the majority of you with feel this way at first. I can only guarantee that it is all uphill from here and that I won't make your homework exceptionally difficult.'
Boring, tedious and infuriating. Yep, that pretty much described the experience. With no lead in at all, the class were preparing a cure of boils; a ten-step process of the most precise recipe Teddy had ever attempted. He kept focusing on the Ravenclaws and how they were getting along. Mixed results. Good. That meant that Hufflepuffs weren't as sub-standard as he'd feared.
'That won't do you any good, you know,' warned a voice from behind. Teddy turned around to face the girl behind her. Like Professor Hale, this girl had long jet black hair, though she was much paler and with significantly less make-up on. Behind her square glasses, her green eyes seemed to stare into Teddy's very being. He fought back a shiver when the girl smiled.
'Are – are you a legilimens?' Teddy asked cautiously.
The girl gave a slight chuckle. 'Worse,' she cryptically responded.
'Well… um… thanks for the tip,' added Teddy, turning back to see if his pickled shrake spines were getting over excited, whatever his book meant by that.
'By the way, take the cauldron off the fire before you add the porcupine quills, trust me,' continued the scary girl.
'You haven't gotten past the Flobberworm mucus. How do you know that?'
As if to answer Teddy's question, Kathy Thompson's cauldron melted away producing a rather foul stench with the bubbly mess. Unfortunately, Kathy's knees were in the way an swelled up when exposed to the mixture. Professor Hale took her off to the hospital wing.
The scary girl went back to her potion, humming whilst stirring. She and Marlon Travers produced near perfect brews by the end. Both were Ravenclaws, of course.
…
Finally, the moment he had feared. Herbology with Professor Longbottom. Saffie was still in the dark about what was on her friend's mind. Teddy could tell she was aching to know, she radiated unwavering concern for his wellbeing despite having only met the day before. Clearly she was more of a Hufflepuff than he was. That was somewhat reassuring.
The pair were the last to enter the greenhouse. Teddy turned his hair back to its natural brown and let it grow long enough to conceal his face. Of course, they sat at the very back.
Professor Longbottom seemed fairly distant himself, barely projecting whatever it was he was saying. In fact he seemed to doubt whether to begin with Puffapods or Venomous Tentacula.
'Well, who can tell me the main property of the seedpods of a Puffapod?' he asked.
Saffie almost rose her hand to respond before Teddy shot her down with a glance.
'The seedpods flower when they come into contact with anything,' answered Lennox.
'Yes. Five points to Hufflepuff. Indeed, they're the hormonal teenagers of the plant kingdom,' joked Longbottom. Once again, the class all laughed.
'Yeah, well Lupin's already gotten himself a girlfriend, hasn't he?' added Lennox.
Longbottom stopped in his tracks. 'What was that?'
'Yeah, Lupin. Over there,' pointed Lennox. Teddy wanted to strangle him. It was too late anyway. He reverted his hair back to its usual turquoise.
'Well, I never. I was wondering when you'd show up, Teddy!' beamed Longbottom.
Teddy made a silent plea, looking Longbottom right in the eye, the same way he'd once done when he set his rug on fire on a visit one time. Longbottom held his gaze for an uncomfortable amount of time. Teddy would rather that Ravenclaw girl stare at him. She seemed to know less.
'I'm sure you'll do very well in my subject. Now, class, what was I saying about venomous tentacula?'