Disclaimer: I own nothing from the Harry Potter universe, that all belongs to J.K. Rowling. Non Llewellyn however is mine.

Chapter 18

I startled awake at the sound of my alarm and as I blearily reached out to turn it off my mind struggled to piece together why I was so tired. It didn't take me too long to recall the evening before and after sparing a moment to curse Ernie silently for making me perform in front of people, I still near bounced out of bed and down to the kitchen with a smile on my face. I actually felt happy, or at least happier than I had in ages.

I smirked to myself wondering what state George would be in when he woke up but as I took a gulp from my glass of water I froze. Shit. My throat felt weird. It wasn't the scratching pain like I'd experienced before but I still felt a swooping feeling like a dull sense of dread settle in my stomach. Shit, shit, shit.

Even as I tried to shrug off the feeling my body was reacting as though I was panicking and I could feel myself start to sweat. My happy mood now most definitely gone I glanced at the clock before rushing to get ready, I didn't want to be late to meet Ron. We had a new surveillance point set up, this time to monitor the possibly not so abandoned cottage where Harry and I had seen CMG disappear into and we faced a long trek to get to it. We'd had to forgo magical methods of getting close to our set up simply because it was a far too obvious way of letting the cottage dweller know we were watching. Magic, for all its uses, gave off markers for those trained to see them and we had no doubt given the complex experimental magic CMG was using that he would know to recognise them.

By the time I'd shrugged into my auror robes and aparated to a small designated clearing I felt that I'd just about managed to calm myself. Ron was already there waiting for me and I almost did a double take. He looked dreadful. He was back to having huge purple bags under his eyes and it wasn't hard for me to guess he hadn't had any sleep last night. He looked miserable as sin.

"Alright?"

He grunted a moody greeting at me and I nodded before replying.

"Yeah, morning."

Or at least, that's what I'd tried to say. The words were hardly intelligible from the hoarse mess of noise that came from my mouth and my hand instinctively clutched at my throat where I'd actually felt my vocal chords react abnormally. It was like there was an extra layer of air coating them, like they weren't connecting properly. Even as I saw Ron startle at the noise I'd made I felt that sinking feeling of dread that I'd managed to push to one side slam back into me and my face crumpled. I just about managed to turn from Ron before I burst into tears.

I yanked my robe to cover my face as I desperately tried to stop them. I couldn't cry in front of a colleague like this let alone Ron, he'd only bloody well tell everyone else. My tears thankfully passed nearly as quickly as they came but even as I sniffed and rubbed at my face all I could feel was bitterness. That I'd been so stupid as to think that my voice had magically healed itself. How the fuck had I duped myself so thoroughly that I'd actually dared be happy? How many times did I have to learn that singing was something I just simply couldn't do now? The worst part of it was that I knew I'd actually sounded a bit good last night. And that once upon a time in my life I'd actually had a natural talent, but thanks to the Death Eaters I'd ever have it again. I closed my eyes as I tried to compose myself and instantly regretted it as an all too familiar scene appeared.

"Again. Make her sing."

"CRUCIO."

"Oi Llewellyn. Non!"

I let out a strangled gasp and swung around blindly at the feel of a hand on my shoulder and as I snapped my eyes open I was confronted with the face of a very startled Ron and I stumbled back a step. My eyes darted around as though I could reassure myself that I wasn't back in that room. Back with them. As I took in the sight of the gorse bushes, the feel of the wind snapping at my cloak and the cried of seagulls in the air my body finally decided to believe my senses in order to calm down enough that I could risk looking at Ron.

Shit that had been almost a waking flashback and I hadn't had one of those in well over a year. To cover my panic I tried my best to offer him a grimace of a smile.

"Sorry. Bad day."

He actually winced at the sound of my voice but just grunted his understanding and gestured for me to follow him.

I spent the walk to our hideout trying to keep myself calm. I counted my steps, my breaths, the number of birds I could see…anything really to keep me grounded in reality. As we got ourselves settled to monitor the cottage Ron startled me by speaking.

"What happened to your voice? You sounded fine yesterday."

I struggled to choke the words out against the all too familiar lump in my throat that indicated tears weren't far away.

"I sang."

"Luna said you did, she said you were good."

I let out a strangled harsh laugh.

"I'm not supposed to." I paused, wondering whether I should say anything more. I mean no one but the healers and Beckett knew about it. "M-my vocal chords are fucked Weasley."

I blinked, slightly surprised at myself as I'd said the words before I'd even realised I'd made up my mind. I waited for the familiar fear or panic to hit at me but it weirdly didn't and I counted that as one bonus at least. I hoped by telling Ron this he wouldn't think I was a complete emotional wreck for bursting into tears earlier. I rubbed at my face tiredly even as I recalled that. Merlin, I truly was pathetic.

"I can bloody well hear that Llewellyn. What happened?"

I froze at that question. I couldn't tell him. No one else could ever know what happened. As I thought of a reply I felt a bitter smile twist onto my mouth.

"Overuse."

Technically not a lie. In fact, it was probably an extremely accurate word just minus the context. I kept my eyes trained on the cottage, counting my breaths in and out where I was fully content to ignore Ron, to try and ignore everything apart from the view in front of me.

"I kissed Luna."

I startled in my seat. It seemed that Ron had other ideas and he continued to talk.

"I was jealous of Hermione and Fred. I-I never made her that happy. Like she was last night. I never gave her that."

And so he'd used Luna. Hermione was moving on and he'd wanted to prove that he could to. If I hadn't been feeling such a mess myself I think I'd have given him a stern talking to but as I risked a quick glance at him from the corner of my eye and saw just how miserable he was looking I guessed he'd already lectured himself. It was actually very unusual for Ron of all people to confide anything in me and I wondered if it was because I'd sort of confided in him.

"Luna said you were a wonderful kisser."

I heard Ron take in a sharp breath.

"She did?"

I nodded silently and I hoped that Ron had seen it. My throat had now moved on from feeling a bit weird to actively starting to hurt and I rummaged in my bag for my flask of tea and tin of treats that I always had ready for surveillance. I poured us both a cup and waved the tin over to Ron with a swish of my wand after having grabbed one cookie for myself. In truth I really wasn't hungry, I felt queasy more than anything and sure enough just the one small bit I tried to take felt like saw dust in my mouth.

Our eight hour stint passed without incident. I supposed in a way I should have been grateful. We were actually in quite a peaceful setting and I didn't have to talk but all that did was leave me with my thoughts. I should have just said no when Ernie tried to make me perform. Then I wouldn't have known for absolutely sure that despite the passage of time my voice was still completely fucked. I mean I should have known, just screaming from a nightmare was enough to give me a sore throat for days I mean what the fuck did I expect?

I was pathetic truly, that I could delude myself this much. Perhaps this was all karma. I'd taken everything for granted so much before the war perhaps this was my penance. To never be able to do one of the things I'd absolutely loved. I surely deserved it. No one had been so pathetic as me, so wholly unprepared for war despite all the signs staring the magical world in the face.

Despite knowing I shouldn't, I kept up my internal diatribe and by the time I got back to the Ministry I was in a foul mood. I shot an irate glare at the overflowing outstanding cases tray. Stupid fucking Gilden was so fucking lazy he couldn't even figure out how to prioritise a case load. I'd worked so damn hard with Hopkiss and Aldred to get a new system in place, to literally streamline the process and Gilden had let it all go to shit.

I cast a dark glance at Beckett's door. This was his bloody fault too. If he'd just have left me to continue doing my desk work we wouldn't be so bloody behind on cases. A bright purple internal memo zoomed into the room and I snatched it out of the air. I'd been sure to check that Stent and Proctor weren't around before I'd stomped my way into the room and I was absurdly glad I didn't for once have to put on my brainless, giggling façade. I ripped the memo open and swore inwardly. Another fucking maintenance fault from Azkaban.

Why, just bloody sodding fucking why were we getting so many and what was being done about it? I felt a trickle of concern seep down my spine with the realisation that CMG, experimental magic and the ward failures could all be linked. I needed to know so much more about the wards at Azkaban than the information I currently had and I needed to know if the maintenance faults were normal or if there was something sinister behind them. I turned on my heel and stomped back out the room to head down a level to the maintenance team.

I supposed really that maintenance wasn't the correct term for them. They were the ones in charge of fixing wards at all Ministry owned buildings. These were normally minor things, really dead simple routine issues that meant the bulk of the people in this department were bored most of the time. I guess that was why they seemingly couldn't fix the Azkaban issue – it was too much work. I passed the door to the Obliviators department before yanking the next door open without even knocking.

There were only two very startled wizards in the room and I stomped up to one of them before thrusting the memo into his face.

"I need the maintenance records of the wards and shields at Azkaban from the time we took it over from the Dementors to today."

I felt inordinately pleased as the wizard shrank back from me, not that I could blame him my voice sounded disgusting.

"That's…that's a lot of records love."

"Then I'll give you until a week Friday. And don't," I leant in closer, "call me love. Are we clear?"

The slightly fat middle aged wizard nodded his head at me quickly as I snatched up a quill and a piece of parchment from his desk to scribble my details down on so he knew where to send the results.

Feeling slightly better I stomped back out of the room and back down the corridor. I was about halfway along when I heard a strange thump from one of the storage cupboards. I always found it weird that we had these but I vaguely recalled Percy mentioning it was easier for the house elves if each department had the items they'd need on hand to prevent them needing to retrieve them from a main storage area. I narrowed my eyes in suspicion after another thump before I yanked the door open. And immediately wished I hadn't.

I stumbled back trying to cover my eyes as a strangled, garbled attempted shriek left me. Answering squawks of dismay reached my ears and I stubbornly kept my eyes averted. I couldn't believe what I'd just seen and I felt myself blush furiously. I mean seriously, what had I done to deserve this? I mean fucking hell. Benson had been in the storage room shagging bloody Rita fucking Skeeter. Who, I now knew, practiced full bodily hair removal. Fucking hell my poor eyes. Poor me. I, urgh, fucking hell I don't think I could ever un-see it.

"We-we're respectable now Llewellyn."

I nearly snorted. Respectable? Fat chance of that Benson. I, very bravely I felt, turned my eyes back to them and I narrowed them at Skeeter before pointing an arm down the corridor where the lift was.

"You, go, now."

Perhaps it was my voice or perhaps I'd managed to convey some sort of menace in my look but she departed without a word and I turned to a quivering Benson.

"You, with me."

I escorted Benson to one of the interview rooms and I felt a brief pang of guilt as I saw how pale and scared he looked before I slid into a seat opposite him.

"Explain."

And Benson, bless him, leapt at the chance. It all came blabbing out of him. How Skeeter often called down at the auror reception desk to see if she could get hold of any information for a story, and that some three months back things had started to change. She'd actively started to pursue him. Poor Benson looked so amazed by that, like he couldn't believe his luck, that I almost smiled. I mean I didn't believe for one second that Skeeter was being completely sincere, what I really wanted to know was had Benson let anything slip about the auror department to her? He was adamant he hadn't.

"I wouldn't do that Llewellyn. It would cost me my job. I told Rita, I let her know that I couldn't have anything with her if she tried to get me to reveal confidential information."

I reached out and patted his hand sympathetically, an idea starting to form in my mind.

"I believe you Benson. I think it's sweet actually. At a time when most don't have a choice of who they end up with you two have that chance, that opportunity, to see where things go. I-I'm actually jealous."

Benson gazed at me with wide eyes.

"Are you really?"

I nodded softly, not wanting to use my voice more than I had to. I mean I was only partly lying. I mean Merlin, who could be jealous of someone being in a relationship with Rita Skeeter?

"Am I…can I still see her?"

I felt slightly alarmed he was asking me for permission and I rubbed at my chin as I pretended to consider it.

"Of course you can Benson. I won't tell on you. But remember, everything classified stays classified."

He nodded enthusiastically at my stern look.

"Oh yes. That goes without saying, of course. I mean I would never betray our department. Thank you Llewellyn, I-I owe you one."

Why yes Benson, you do.

I tried to cover my surge of victory at things having panned out exactly as I wanted and I stood and indicated to Benson I'd walk him to his desk. You see the thing about Benson was that while he was the reception clerk he was often overlooked, and I knew just how that felt. But more importantly as the reception clerk he had access to all the comings and goings of the aurors in the department. He, weirdly, would know people's work rotas and that was exactly what I wanted.

As I made to leave him I pretended to pause to say something before reconsidering and shaking my head.

"What is it Llewellyn, can I help?"

"Oh it's nothing."

"No please, just ask."

"Well…" I took my time pretending to ponder. "I mean this isn't really for me. More for a friend. They need to know the rota of a certain auror, you couldn't help with that could you?"

Benson looked relieved.

"Oh is that all? Yes of course I can. Whose do you want?"

I couldn't believe my luck. After looking through Stent's Thursday rota, Hermione and I had figured out that her assailant had been Auror Tilden and I quickly gave Benson the name. Within five minutes I had Tilden's monthly rota.

"Benson, you're a star, you know that?"

I left him blushing slightly as I walked back to my desk. I still had a lump of gloom sat in my stomach but I at least didn't feel quite as furious as I had earlier despite how awful my voice sounded. I rummaged in my bag to fish out George's notepad with the idea to ask how he was only to see he'd already messaged.

{You're my hero. My Non in shining armour. You're perfect.}

{Ar you stil drunk?}

I sat back with a bemused smile. I wasn't sure what time he'd sent the message as the notepad didn't reveal that but he surely must have been. I read over my reply again and my face fell. Shit I really couldn't spell. Perfect? I was rubbish. I was about to snap the notepad shut when a reply came through.

{I was a bit. Not now though. Seriously Non you saved me from a day of hell.}

Well lucky him.

{Glad I helped.}

{You always do.}

{I can't remember if I told you on the walk home but you were amazing.}

I frowned in confusion. What had he thought had happened?

{Say what?}

{At singing. If I had a voice like yours I'd sing all of the time.}

I felt my face start to crumple again and I ducked my head so no others in the department could see even as I snapped the notepad shut and shoved it away from me as though I could hide myself from the words. I had used to sing all of the time.

It wasn't even bitterness that hit me this time but full blown misery and anger. Why the fuck couldn't Ernie have left me alone? Why the fuck did George have to keep trying to be so nice? Why couldn't I just be left fucking alone? I was sick of having to socialise so much, to have to pretend to be okay all of the time. If I hadn't had to socialise I'd never have had to sing and then I wouldn't be feeling so rubbish.

I angrily shoved the notepad back into my bag before I snatched up my notes on the counterfeit goods. I'd at least had a reply from the French Ministry to say they would get the information to me by the end of the week which was at least something positive and I threw myself back into work. I didn't want to think about anything else.

The next day I got up stupidly early, left a scribbled note for Hermione wishing her a happy birthday together with Tilden's rota before I guiltily went in to work. I didn't need to be in early and I really should have at least waited to see Hermione that morning but I didn't want to face any questions from her about my voice.

The rest of my week followed a similar routine. I'd get up early and work late and do everything I could to avoid seeing anyone. The cloud of misery that I'd felt settle over me only seemed to get worse until it was a struggle to even get out of bed. My nightmares came back so badly I'd had to place a silencing charm on my room as I was so worried Hermione would hear me and in that moment I bitterly resented her living with me. I couldn't even be myself in my own house any more.

It seemed that everything was irritating me. Hermione's hair was bloody everywhere in the bathroom, we always seemed to be on the cusp of running out of food, her books and parchments were everywhere downstairs. It wasn't even that she was messy it's just my house was so small and she had so much work it soon took up all the space.

Work wasn't any better. There was constant noise in the room so much so I found it hard to concentrate. Just as I'd be pulling on a thread of our investigation Ron would come barging in or Harry would be whistling stupidly to himself, and there were so many memo's zooming about the place. I'd even resorted to wearing my herbology ear defenders as a means to cut out the noise until Beckett has surprised me with an actual fucking dung bomb and then bawled me out for not being constantly prepared. I'd taken myself off to clean up in the shower and stewed there for a good half hour before I felt I could trust myself not to shout at him.

My planner went out the window given I was practically living at work. I hadn't gone for a run in days, I'd missed my shopping for food and potions supplies, I'd not had chance to do my breathing exercises and I hadn't even been able to face the stupid notepad to see George's last message about singing. I felt awful, truly awful and I knew when I was like this it was best just to avoid everyone. I mean I was miserable enough on my own I didn't want to share that around.

What made it worse was that I still had to pretend to almost fail at training. Usually when I felt bad I could train and prove to myself I was still capable but with Stent and Proctor stinking up the place I just didn't have that option to me either. I just wanted to lock myself away and hide, preferably under a duvet, until I felt at least marginally better.

By the following Thursday I was pretty much communicating in Ron like grunts to everyone except Benson who still seemed so thankful that I hadn't blabbed his secret relationship to Beckett that he was going out of his way to be extra nice to me.

"Get in here Llewellyn."

I cast a very carefully crafted blank look at Beckett as he glowered at me from the door to his office. I hadn't said a single word to him since the dung bomb incident on Tuesday and I nodded my head stiffly to show I'd heard before I made my way over.

"Sit."

God, he really did like ordering people around like they were dogs. I sat anyway.

As Beckett stared at me I pointedly stared straight ahead at the clock on the wall and waited for him to speak. Ten very long minutes later he let out an exasperated sigh.

"You're finished for the day Llewellyn. Go home, get some rest and come back in tomorrow morning."

"Why?"

I frowned at him in confusion and wondered if people could grind their teeth hard enough people could actually hear it as I took in how tense Beckett's jaw was.

"Because I just ordered you to. Do you understand what an order is Llewellyn?"

I bit back one of the sarcastic replies that wanted to slip from my mouth and I nodded my head instead and stood.

"Oh good, no answering back. Take this Llewellyn and be sure to drink it. When you start back stick to your actual rota, I don't want to see you skulking about the place when you shouldn't be here."

He'd thrust a brown paper package at me and I almost fumbled with it before I clasped it to my chest, nodded again and left his room. It didn't take me long to gather my things and I didn't even spare a glance at Harry and Ron before I took myself off to the aparation point and soon found myself at home.

As I set the kettle to boil I unwrapped the package to see a jar of hot chocolate.

Huh, what does he think this will do, magically make me feel better?

I shrugged to myself even as I surveyed the room. I really needed to clean in here. I needed to harvest more vegetables from the garden too and check on the green house. Plus I needed to start a batch of potions as my money was running low and I soon would struggle to afford the more complex ones. Merlin I had my laundry to do too. I sat wearily at the table and rested my head on it and sighed. I didn't have the energy to do any of it.

As the kettle sang I tiredly flicked my wand and watched as a teaspoon scooped some of the chocolate powder into a mug before the kettle poured some water into it and a large glug of milk followed. I set the teaspoon to stir as I ran a hand over my face and moved to tuck my hair behind my ear. God I needed to wash it, it was at that lank horrible stage but I couldn't even face having a shower. I scraped it back from my face and tied it up before managing to stand and grab the mug, even as I summonsed my duvet down from upstairs. It was waiting for me in the hall and I dragged it behind me into the living room where I made a beeline for the sofa. I sank into it, wrapped the duvet around me and took a sip of my drink.

I mean it wasn't amazing but it was nice, and for the next half hour I sipped at it slowly and just did everything I could not to think. I just felt so tired, and so sad, and I just wanted everything to go away. When my mug was empty I yanked the covers up over my head and did what I'd been wanting to do and hid from the world.

I supposed I must have fallen asleep as a loud banging noise startled me into consciousness and I panicked for a moment when I was met with suffocating darkness before I managed to free my head from the duvet. I glanced around in confusion before my eyes widened in alarm to see George standing in the doorway.

"What are you doing here?"

Okay that came out a bit more rudely than I'd meant and I had to hide a wince as what had been almost concern on George's face morphed into annoyance.

"I came to see if you were okay. I did knock you know but you didn't answer. Why are you on the couch?"

I flushed as I automatically ducked my head and went to push my hair behind my ear only to realise it was still tied back. Oh god my hair was ridiculously greasy. I knew I had at least four spots on my chin and I was sure I'd been dribbling in my sleep. Fuck I must look terrible. I studiously avoided looking at George as I clutched my duvet closer like a shield.

"I was having a duvet day."

"Right. And the whole of last week, where have you been?"

"Working."

I muttered the word moodily as I traced the flower pattern on my bedding. I mean what was it his business anyway?

"You were too busy even to reply to a message or a letter? You've ignored me, Ginny and Luna, plus Hermione says she hasn't even seen you not even on her birthday."

I shrugged.

"Non."

The sharpness of George's voice had me looking up despite myself only to see he'd walked closer and was now hovering near the edge of the sofa and I felt my shoulders stiffen even as he frowned.

"What's wrong?"

Damn it he'd said that so softly, like he actually wanted to know and I felt my breath catch even as my eyes filled. Shit.

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.

"I've just had a really bad week."

"Couldn't any of us have helped?"

"I'm not going to inflict my bad mood on other people George. Look I'm going to shower, you can just see yourself out right?"

"No."

I paused in the process of adjusting my duvet as I'd stood and I glanced at him completely confused and not a little bit irritated. What did he mean, no?

"Go shower Non, I'll make you a drink, I'm not going anywhere."

I opened my mouth to argue but then took in the stubborn set of George's jaw. I mean I could argue my point but I really didn't want to be stood in front of him looking quite so disgusting any longer than I had to so I simply nodded stiffly before making my way upstairs.

I supposed the nap and hot chocolate I'd had had made me feel slightly better but I was honest to Merlin just feeling so irritable I bit my lip as I tried to think how to handle George. I didn't want to snap at him anymore than I already had. I rather childishly took longer in the shower than I usually did in the hope George would have gotten bored and left but I was disappointed to see he was still in the kitchen when I ventured back downstairs. Worse, he'd done the cleaning. I flushed in embarrassment.

"You didn't have to clean. I'm more than capable of looking after myself."

"I know you're capable Non. I was just helping, it's what friends do. And you know most people would respond with a thank you."

I bristled at his words, hating that he was in effect telling me off before I took a deep breath. I mean he was right.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now, c'mere."

George had walked a step closer and spread his arms to indicate a hug and I actually scoffed in annoyance.

"I don't want a hug George."

I tried to ignore a pang of guilt as his arms fell heavily to his side before he shrugged.

"Alright. Can you get me your planner? I have a gift for you."

I begrudgingly fished the planner out from my bag and after muttering his name I set it down on the table in front of us before I gazed on in horror as George began to tap at it with his wand and remove entries and I lunged for his arm to stop him.

"What the fuck George? Can't you just leave my stuff alone?"

"No."

He actually shrugged me off with a glare as he continued to tap at the words before he stalked out into the hallway and came back with a package.

"This is for you. And before you snap at me again I know you can look after yourself but sometimes Non you need to learn to accept help from people who would willingly give it."

I scowled heavily at his words and I ripped the paper from the package and then froze. It was a case of potions. My eyes traced over my planner. He'd basically just removed all of the entries for potion making that I'd put in there for the next month.

Oh.

I felt a hot, prickly feeling that felt a lot like shame. God he was only being nice.

"Oh." I rubbed at my face before I risked a glance at him. He didn't look angry, in fact he had that annoying carefully blank look on his face. "Thank you George but I can't accept it. Don't you need these for the shop?"

"We have plenty of stock Non so yes you can accept it."

"But-"

I was cut off quite rudely by George placing his hand over my mouth and I scowled.

"We could bicker over this for the next ten minutes but trust me, I'd win. Now can I please give you a hug?"

I opened my mouth to say no before I paused. I mean a hug wouldn't kill me and he had been nice despite me being completely horrible. I nodded hesitantly and George didn't wait another second before he hugged me. Helga it was actually…nice.

Normally I couldn't wait for our hugs to be over but for the first time I actively hugged him back and squeezed him hard around the middle. I felt a smile, my first one in days, tug at the side of my mouth at the startled sound he made before he adjusted his arms, one around my shoulder and the other around my waist as he turned it into a bear hug.

He felt nice, he smelt nice and again for the first time in days I felt a tiny bit more together and I bit my lip guiltily as I took a step back. Maybe if I hadn't ignored him I could have felt like this a bit sooner.

"I'm sorry for snapping at you George. It's usually safer to stay away when I'm in a mood."

"I'm not afraid of a bit of snapping Non. Honestly I think we'd all have preferred your snapping than you ignoring us."

I gave him a disbelieving look but he just chuckled at me.

"Look c'mon, it's Ginny and Harry's engagement party at The Burrow tonight and I know everyone wants to see you. In fact mum has specifically said if she doesn't see you within the next twenty four hours she's going to go to the Ministry personally herself to see that you're okay."

"She can't do that, don't let her!"

George outright laughed at that.

"Just come to the party?"

God I really didn't want to. I'd not had nearly enough time hiding under the duvet and being perfectly honest I was still really not feeling myself.

"I dunno George I'm not in a good mood, I don't want to be a downer on people when it should be a celebration."

"That's not possible because I'll cheer you up. C'mon let's grab your bag and go. I can tell you all about how Fred was so hungover last week he threw up on a customer."

I let out a startled laugh.

"He bloody didn't?"

"Oh he did. There'd been no hydrating potion waiting for him in the morning." George wore a smug grin even as he reached out and tweaked the end of my hair. "You seriously did save me Non."

I blushed lightly even as I nervously shifted on my feet.

"I need to get changed George I can't go to a party like this."

I gestured to my jeans and long sleeved top. It was pretty much plain as can be but George looked at me in bafflement.

"But you look nice."

"But-"

"Do you like what you're wearing?"

"Yes but-"

"Then you don't need to change."

He grabbed my hand then and started to drag me from the house and I only just managed to snag hold of my bag. He completely ignored my protestations as he took me by side along apparition to The Burrow. Merlin I'd forgotten even in the course of a week just what a force of nature he was.

He hurried me up to the house and barged the door open as he bellowed our arrival. It turned out that we were in fact quite early and Mrs Weasley and Fleur were in the process of still preparing the food in the kitchen. Fleur was looking stunning in a light blue dress and I ducked my head. God I must look awful in comparison.

"Bonjour Non, it is lovely to see you."

"Hi Fleur, how are you? I-oh!"

I gasped in surprise as Mrs Weasley enveloped me in a hug before she steered me into a seat.

"Oh Non it's been far too long since we've seen you and I'm sure you've lost weight. Here have something quick to eat, dinner won't be ready for a couple of hours. No, no I won't have you help George says you've been working non-stop. You have a break dear."

I struggled to shut my jaw as I cast an alarmed look at George but he just shrugged happily as he sat himself opposite me. Fleur cast me a sympathetic smile and I took a few moments to gather myself. Maybe it's because I was so tired but I didn't feel as nervous about being here this time which was good.

"Now Non, you must let me know when you're next free on a Sunday so we can have you over for a spot of lunch with George."

She'd placed a giant sandwich in front of me. It on its own would probably be more than I'd eaten in the last few days.

"Oh my work rota is pretty full on I'm not sure-"

"Why don't you check your planner Non?"

I paused at George's words.

"Oh you have a planner? That's a wonderful idea Non, yes let's see that."

I'd half removed the planner from my bag at Mrs Weasley's request before I paused again. I couldn't open my planner here I'd have to say 'George Weasley' to it for Merlin's sake. I snuck a glare at George and sure enough he was fighting a stupid grin. I took my time then to bring out my planner even as I slipped my wand in to my hand and under the table pointed it the sink and cast a wordless charm that saw water shoot out from the faucet and start spraying all around the kitchen.

I smoothed the planner out on to the table and plastered a reproachful look on my face.

"George, what on earth did you do that for?"

It took all my will power not to change expression or giggle out loud at the outraged look on his face. Mrs Weasley however didn't even pause in her reaction.

"GEORGE WEASELY!You turn that tap of this instance do you hear me? It's not enough that you aren't even helping Fleur and I prepare but you have to play another stupid prank. If I had a galleon for every time you and Fred have done something like this your father would never have to work again."

As George rushed to fix the tap I could see Mrs Weasley prepare herself for another tirade.

"Mrs W- I mean Molly, here's my planner."

It was amazing how quickly she could switch from angry to nice.

"Oh you are a dear Non. Oh look now a week Sunday, that's just perfect. Yes I'll go and put that in my calendar…"

As she bustled out of the room Fleur started to chuckle and I let a grin spread across my face as I glanced triumphantly at George who'd sat himself back opposite me and I inhaled sharply at the look on his face even as my insides swooped. On shit.

George wasn't angry. Oh no, in fact he seemed a little pleased. No, it was the smile that was slowly spreading across his face that worried me. It was weirdly more of a look I was used to seeing on Fred, primarily when he was plotting against Hermione.

"Well played Non."

My grin nearly fell off my face as I giggled nervously. Do you ever get that feeling sometimes, like you've bitten off more than you can chew? Or what was that muggle expression, like when you've caught a tiger by the tail and then didn't know what to do with it? That was exactly how I was feeling.

I grabbed my sandwich and took a bite as Mrs Weasley came back into the room and set about giving George tasks to do. As I ate I tried to ignore the calculated looks he was shooting at me, and the grin that spread across his face every time I caught his gaze. God but it was hot in here with all of the cooking, and I fanned myself with my hand as Fleur started to laugh again.

"Ah Non you are so funny."

I shot her a puzzled look. I mean, I hadn't even done anything. I did however decide to spend the rest of my time around George under high alert. I mean I already knew not to accept food from either of the twins but you could never be sure what else they were plotting.

Once the food was done we started to set up outside, a job that was made much easier when Bill and Mr Weasley arrived although little Victoire could cause a surprising amount of carnage when she set her mind to it. I made sure to keep away from George even if that meant me spending a lot of time near Mrs Weasley but as she nattered on at me I did in a weird way start to feel better.

I wasn't having to talk a lot and I wasn't feeling like snapping at anyone. The Weasleys were just so down to earth and with so little pretence it was hard not to feel at ease. We'd just managed to get everything ready when everyone else started to arrive.

Ron and Luna hovered to one side in what looked like a surprising serious conversation and Fred made a beeline for his twin where he listened for a moment before roaring with laughter and spinning around to grin at me.

"Non! Come here!"

I cast a nervous glance around hoping that Hermione would turn up to save me but as the seconds passed and she didn't appear I reluctantly made my way over to them.

"You've been holding out on us Non."

"Er, I really haven't Fred."

He chucked an arm over my shoulder with a laugh.

"Course you have. Never had you pinned as a sneaky one. What's your course of action George?"

I shot George an alarmed look. Oh God, what had I done? George took his time to ponder the question as he reached out to pull me away from Fred before placing his own arm around my shoulder. Ordinarily I'd have frowned at him but I was too concerned about his response and I felt my anxiety churn as he smiled slowly.

"Oh, she'll find out."

"I will?"

He nodded.

"But – but not tonight, right?"

I'd never felt so relieved to see his lopsided smile as he gave me a squeeze.

"Not tonight."

I near sagged in relief and even managed a giggle at Fred's crestfallen look.

"I can't believe it, disappointed in my own twin," he shook his head mournfully before levelling me with a serious look. "You need any tips of how to deal with him you come to me. I know all his secrets."

"Oi!"

"Fair's fair dear Georgie, I know you helped Hermione on the weekend."

I glanced back and forth between the two as they continued to bicker and I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face. Merlin I'd actually missed them.

"Oh Non, there you are!"

I spun around slightly startled by Hermione's voice but she was prevented from hugging me by George's arm and she stared at him in annoyance.

"Are you alright? I've not seen you for days."

"Yeah all good, just really busy, sorry I missed you last Thursday," I shifted guiltily, "Did you have a nice birthday?"

"Oh yes it was lovely thank you. And thank you for my gift."

She reached out and squeezed my hand and I managed a smile.

"Any time."

"Oh hey I wanted to ask you, what happened to the radio?"

My shoulders stiffened before I could stop them. Oh shit, that.

"Radio, what radio?"

Double shit, she'd captured George's attention.

"Non's radio, I got home on Tuesday and it was all smashed up."

That was because it was either reducto the radio or take my anger out on the piano and I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I'd broken the latter.

"Oh ha," I gave a nervous chuckle, "I dropped it. I didn't have time to clean it sorry."

Hermione didn't look like the believed me at all.

"Right…"

"Oh look our dearest baby sister and her needing to be threatened husband to be, come along let's go say hello."

Fred grabbed Hermione's hand and hurried her over while George and I walked more slowly behind.

"Um, 'needing to be threatened'?" I cast a questioning glance up at George.

"Of course, it's a big brother's sworn duty. Course Ron won't do it, Charlie's not here, Bill's far too above such things, and Percy's lectures go on too long to be effective. Fred and I however are perfectly suited to the task."

As the twins exchanged wicked grins I actually felt sorry for Harry. Then again, he'd faced down You Know Who so I'm sure that he was more than a match for them.

Ginny grabbed a hold of me then and for the next hour or so my life was lost to her. If I thought the twins were a bundle of energy sometimes I forgot that Ginny could be just as bad. I felt absurdly guilty that if it hadn't been for George I wouldn't even have attended her engagement party. She was so happy though it was infectious and it was at times like this I remembered just how much I liked her. I could never understand why my brain found it so easy to forget but then again it did seem to like to play tricks on me.

"And of course Non, you'll be one of my bridesmaid's right?"

I choked so badly on my glass of wine it snorted out of my nose. Ginny nearly fell of her chair laughing even as I tried to stop my own as I desperately mopped at my face. God I hoped no one else had seen that.

"You want me to be a bridesmaid?" I was a bit stunned. "But Ginny I'll be rubbish at it I-ouch!"

I rubbed at my mouth in shock.

"Oh Merlin sorry Non I only meant to cover your mouth I misjudged the force."

Ginny looked so appalled at herself I giggled.

"Look one rule of being my bridesmaid, which you are going to be you know I won't take no for an answer, and that is you are not allowed to talk yourself down."

I gaped at her in outrage.

"But Ginny-"

"I know, I know it's your go to move to deflect any positive attention or comments I get it but in my presence, no negative talk about yourself do you hear me?"

I gaped at her. There was so much wrong with her sentence I didn't know where to start. I didn't use it as a bloody deflection.

"Please Non, you're one of my closest friends. Also, from a purely selfish point of view I need you to save me from Fleur and my mum. They're nightmares about wedding planning. Please say yes. Please?"

God damn it she'd turned the puppy dog eyes on me. No wonder Harry could never refuse her.

"I'm just amazed you'd ask me. Course I'll be a bridesmaid if you want me to silly. I'd be honoured."

She launched herself at me then which took me completely by surprise. Ginny wasn't exactly much of a hugger either but she seemed so damned happy to be engaged, like her marrying Harry was now somehow real, that she couldn't contain herself.

The evening was a good one, and it turned even better when Ginny and Harry said that there were two other announcements. Bill quite very calmly stood to say that he and Fleur were expecting their second child. The real surprise however came from when Percy stood. We all by this point guessed what his and Audrey's news would be but he was so overcome either with nerves, pride or happiness I couldn't tell that he couldn't get the words out and when Audrey serenely stood and announced she "up the duff" the celebrations went crazy.

I'd never seen the other Weasley siblings mob Percy with hugs like this before and I took the time that they were all distracted to sidle up to Audrey and Fleur to offer my congratulations. Mr Weasley was stood beaming with one arm around Mrs Weasley as she sobbed with happiness into his shoulder. I mean I know I'd thought it before but they really were such a nice family.

I barely had chance to congratulate Bill before Percy had crushed me into a hug.

"I'm going to be a dad Non, a dad!"

"Yeah you are Perc, congratulations."

I realised I was beaming back at him and I wondered at what part of the evening my smiles had changed from forced to completely natural. I managed to disentangle myself from Percy so I could find George who was busy whispering something to Audrey as she doubled over laughing but as he caught my eye he hurried over.

"Thank you."

I blurted the words before he could even say anything and he frowned at me in confusion.

"What on earth for?"

I glanced around nervously hoping no one would hear me.

"For making me come. It's such a good evening, I'm glad I haven't missed it."

As a beam spread across his face I knew what was coming next and sure enough I was soon caught up in a hug.

"Oof George, not so tight, honestly I swear you Weasleys are addicted to hugs."

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

George pulled back slightly and laughed down at me before he led me back over to the table. It was clearly going to be one of those nights where everyone stayed up talking and I shifted a bit nervously. I was really tired but I didn't want to break up the party early.

"Non dear, could you come and help?"

I glanced up slightly startled to see Mrs Weasley beckoning at me from the back door and I hurried over.

"Hi Molly, what do you need help with?"

"Oh nothing dear I just thought you could do with a rest. You looked so peaky when you go here and Harry's said you've had a dreadful cold all week. Why don't you have a quick nap? We'll all still be here in another half hour or so."

I nearly gaped at her.

"How did…?"

"Non, I have seven children, I know the signs. Here I'll show you where to rest."

I had no choice but to follow Mrs Weasley up the stairs. I'd assumed she was showing me to Ginny's room but she carried on to the floor above and I felt nerves shoot through me at the letters F and G on the door.

"Oh er, Molly, I don't think I should-"

"Here you are dear, have a nice snooze on George's bed, I'll come and wake you in about forty minutes."

She honest to Merlin all but shoved me in the room before shutting the door behind me and I stood there frozen in place. I mean what if the place was booby trapped? And by that I meant what if there were random joke products dotted about? And just how was I supposed to tell which bed was George's?

The evening light filtering through the windows helped as I glanced around and it soon became apparent which bed belonged to which twin. Fred's still had a giant peeling F on the wall above it whereas George's G had been replaced over the years with parchment pieces covered in his writing, quidditch posters and a large number of burn marks. Fred's was less crowded but even he had notes and quidditch displayed everywhere.

I hesitantly made my way to George's bed and sat down experimentally. So far so good, nothing had jumped out at me, or exploded or caught fire. All good. I felt a bit weird though about sleeping in his bed so I made sure to stay on top of the covers. I nearly moaned however when my head hit the pillow. By Helga it was so comfy and it smelt amazing. It smelt just like George had that day at the quidditch match. I had to make sure to ask Mrs Weasley what she used to do the laundry.

I was a bit apprehensive about sleeping as I didn't want to have a nightmare while I was here so I made sure to try and keep myself to a snooze as that way I could wake up if I felt a nightmare coming on.

Despite my intentions I must have drifted off and I only started to come to when I heard the creak of the door. My mind was hazy and I wondered just why Mrs Weasley wasn't saying anything. I mean she said she'd come and wake me, right? I heard a heavy tread step closer. That was not a Mrs Weasley foot step and I felt a surge of alarm and as a heavy hand clasped my shoulder I bolted up right and felt a shooting pain in my head as it collided with the figure and I scrambled for my wand.

"Lumos"

I muttered it quickly then let out a cry of alarm as I saw George sprawled on the floor by the bed his hands clutching at his nose where there was an alarming amount of blood dripping on to his t-shirt.

"Oh shit! George I'm sorry, you startled me. Shit."

I scrambled from the bed and over to him as I tried to help him sit up. God he was bleeding so much. I yanked my arm from one of the sleeves of my top and tried to hold it to his nose as he visibly winced.

"Oh George I'm really sorry."

To my amazement he started to laugh.

"S'ok. I should have made more noise when I came in. Is your head okay?"

It was throbbing like crazy but I just shook my head at him

"Its fine, I'm more worried about you. Shit George, I think I've broken your nose."

George chuckled thickly.

"I noticed."

"Well I can fix the break but I'm not so great at stopping bleeding."

"Thas ok, mum knows the right spell. Help me up?"

It was rather awkward trying to help him stand while also trying to keep a garment pressed against his nose to stop the flow but I managed it and I quickly helped him downstairs. Mrs Weasley let out a slight shriek before she hurried forward but it took only two quick spells from her and she had both the bleeding stopped and George's nose fixed.

"I mean it will bruise dear but no damage done, still handsome as ever."

She'd finished wiping his face clean and smoothed his hair back from his head in a blatantly motherly gesture and I was amazed to see George blush.

"Oh but look you've got blood all over your clothes. You too Non, here pass them here and I'll give them a wash before a stain sets in."

I froze for a moment. I mean yes I had a vest top on underneath the long sleeved one I was wearing but it was a lot lower cut than my tops normally were but as Mrs Weasley gazed at me expectantly I reluctantly handed my first top over and had to fight against crossing my arms over myself. I mean I knew I was being absurd, and it's not like my boobs were even that big it's just that normally what with auror robes or my t-shirts they just never normally were on display at all.

"C'mon Non let's go back outside."

George snagged an arm around my shoulder and I flushed to realise he'd had nothing on under his t-shirt.

"Er George, it's nearly October, won't you get cold?"

"Don't be daft Non, haven't you heard of this marvellous thing that can keep you warm?"

His eyes were a bit bright and I eyed up the numerous empty bottles stacked on one of the tables.

"What, alcohol?"

George chuckled before leaning in to whisper in my ear.

"Magic Non, magic."

Instantly I felt a warmth settle over me from his arm. Of course, a bloody heating charm. I rolled my eyes at his cheeky grin and he took that moment to yank my on to his lap as he sat at the table. God, he really was a bit drunk.

"George don't be stupid I can sit at my own seat."

He completely ignored me as he decided to address the table.

"Non head butted me and broke my nose"

Startled laughter soon turned into borderline hysterics from Fred as he took in George's still red nose and his state of undress and soon the others joined in and I started to try and protest my innocence.

"It's your fault George you were," fuck what was the word? "Looming over me."

"Oi I wasn't looming, all I was going to do was shake you awake."

We continued to bicker even as a bottle of beer found its way into my possession. It must have been creeping towards midnight and even with the warming charm George had placed on us I felt myself shiver.

"You know if you let me put my arm around you, you wouldn't be cold."

"If you let me up from sitting on you George so I could go get a jumper I wouldn't be cold either."

I'd made repeated attempts to escape all of which had been foiled, mainly from George shooting me a pathetic look and saying how much I'd hurt his nose. Guilt tripping was horrible.

"I don't understand how you aren't cold at all either charm or no George. You should at least be wearing some sort of clothing."

George casually reached up to scratch at his nose and pretended to wince and I rolled my eyes.

"George you know you're a-a"

"A what?"

I frowned furiously.

"You're a word I currently can't think of, but I will."

A chuckle that was not George's reached me and I flushed slightly to see that Bill was watching us, but he gave me a kind smile.

"How's your ward research going Non, did the books I sent over help?"

"Yes and no. I've got even more questions now I think. Thank you so much for letting me borrow them. You know I never thought I'd say it but I really miss the Hogwarts library."

"What, doesn't the Auror department have one?"

I glanced over my shoulder at George's question and shook my head at him.

"It apparently used to but it got practically destroyed under You Know Who's regime."

"Why don't you just go to The Magner Liber?"

I blinked stupidly at Hermione's voice.

"The what?"

She scoffed before laughing.

"Oh don't be silly you have to know about it Non. It's the main public magical library, its right near Greenwich. Surely you've been?"

You know it didn't happen often but sometimes I didn't like Hermione. She was so all knowing she often made assumptions that people knew everything she did she could be really dismissive if not downright patronising when she found out they didn't. I felt a lot of eyes on me and I shifted awkwardly in my seat, or well on George really.

"I've never even heard of it."

This was one of those moments that I hated because I knew it was one of those things that had my father still been alive he'd have told me about. I hated being ignorant because of my circumstances.

I could see Hermione was about to laugh at me again when her mug of butterbeer exploded and splattered across her face. Oh god had I done that by accident? I really didn't think that I had. Loud laughter from Fred however soon revealed the culprit although he sprang back in alarm from the table when Hermione brandished her wand.

"That's it Fred Weasley. I've had absolutely enough of your stupid, ridiculous and quite frankly shitty jokes."

"Shitty? Steady on now Granger that's a bit much."

He was still retreating down the garden, hands half raised in surrender and I shared a slightly startled glance with George after they'd disappeared from view.

"My money's on Hermione."

"Damn I was going to say that but I suppose I'm duty bound to back my twin."

I giggled at his words and was pleased to see everyone else had turned back to their own conversations and that the awkward moment had passed.

"I can take you there, if you like? To The Magna Liber?"

"Oh you don't, you don't have to do that George."

"I'd like to."

I had to fight against twisting my fingers nervously even as I wanted to wrap an arm around my midriff as a way of guarding myself against nerves.

"Well, okay, but I-I don't know when I'll have time to go."

"Monday afternoon. We cleared your planner earlier remember."

I bit my lip. That was fairly soon. I didn't know after how I'd been sleeping if I could calm myself down enough to go.

"It's a giant library Non. It's very quiet, there are very few people there, and it's full of books."

I shivered and I wasn't sure if it was from the cold or George's words near my ear. I mean really it sounded like a wonderful place. I was just still trying to work through the mild embarrassment that I hadn't known about it.

"Don't you have to work that afternoon?"

"It is one of the very many perks of being your own boss Non, that I get to decide just when and when not to work."

"Oh," I felt a hesitant smile grown on my face, "Well okay then I'd like that."

George smiled back at me before giving me a one armed squeeze which I rather embarrassingly answered with a yawn and he chuckled.

"C'mon Non, let's get our clothes from mum and I'll take you home"

"Oh you don't have to- "

I stopped talking abruptly at the look George shot me. You know I still didn't know him well but I was starting to learn when it would be pointless to argue.

I said a quiet goodbye to everyone that remained before I hurried back into the house after George and quickly shrugged into my long sleeved top where I frowned. It didn't smell like George's pillow at all.

"What's that face for?"

"Oh" I stuttered slightly, "I thought it would smell nice like your pillow."

"My pillow smelt nice?"

Have you ever had one of those blushes, that's not an instant one but is slow growing when the full realisation of what you've said hits you? Well one of those was happening to me as I hastily made my way to the front door and decided to pointedly ignore George's question as I felt my face finally settle into what had to be a shade of crimson.

"I can aparate myself home you know."

It had come out snappier than I'd intended but George just chuckled before he latched a hand on to my arm.

"Oh I know, I'm just returning the favour."

When we reappeared into the Welsh countryside it was to discover it was pouring with rain and even as we both conjured charms to protect ourselves it was hardly enough to keep us dry for the short run up to the front porch.

"Did you have a good night then Non?"

George's eyes crinkled when he smiled and I couldn't help but smile back.

"I did, I really did. Thank you again George, and I really am sorry about your nose."

"It was my own fault Non"

He took a step closer and I began to prepare myself for a hug.

"You know Non I-"

"Exhibitionist!"

I blurted the word, I think startling myself more than George and I giggled to myself as his eyebrows near shot into his hairline.

"Say what?"

"The word that you are that I couldn't remember before. That's what you are. An exhibitionist."

I nodded my head firmly even as George's jaw gaped somewhat before he chuckled and shook his head slightly ruefully.

"Well I suppose that's fair."

I hummed my agreement and managed not to tense at all as he hugged me.

"Thank you George."

I felt him sigh.

"You don't have to-"

"Thank you."

I gave him a squeeze for emphasis. I don't think he quite realised how much he'd helped. Hell I don't think I realised that it was possible for anyone to help me as much as he had today.

"You're welcome."

It was only a quiet murmur and I nearly missed it as George pulled away and I turned to open my door.

"G'night George."

"Night Non."

He rubbed the back of his neck briefly before he turned, wand raised to protect him from the weather and disappeared into the night. I stayed at my open door for a moment, just listening to the rain before I shook myself.

I needed to get to bed, then get up early and get started on my planner again. I felt a smile spread across my face as I caught sight of the box of options again. At least this time things would be a bit easier.

A/N:

Hello to all my new followers, it's great to have you on board.

If any of you have taken the time to review – THANK YOU. Sorry if I haven't responded by private message this time, I've been a bit pressed for time and I have extremely limited internet access at the moment.

I hope you like this chapter. It was a struggle to start with but then soon turned in to a monster chapter. There should hopefully be more about the investigations Non's working on in the next chapter but I have to admit George is an exceptionally demanding character, he doesn't like to be left out!

I'd love to read your comments so please let me know what you think.

Diolch,

Yav