Oh my... ten chapters already? where has the time gone?! And it already has 27 reviews! You flatter me with your lovely comments, dear readers.

chapter 10

A toss up

"What's wrong?" she asked.

He wasn't entirely sure she had sensed his blush. He willed it to dim. "What do you mean?"

"Something's been wrong since you stopped by my house. Don't pretend otherwise. I can tell even without chakra that something isn't right."

He sighed out a lungful of air. Of course, she had noticed something amiss. She was highly perceptive, almost like a sixth sense to make up for her lack of sight. He leaned against the tree behind him and considered his words carefully. There was no use beating around the bush.

"Kai-san is reaching the end of his life."

"What?" she shrieked loudly, a protective hand cupped over the spot where the insect lay now buzzing with the same distress as it's mistress. "He- he's going to die? But-"

Her lip quivered and her attachment was more than apparent to his surprised gaze. He knew she had cared for the insect. He cared for his hive as well. But he carried so many and lost them to battle so frequently he couldn't afford to get so attached. She didn't have the luxury of that detachment. To her, this loss was deep and personal as losing a precious and dear pet and it would no doubt come harder when the time came.

"He was not newly hatched when he left. The time you had was more than generous. He lived an easy life with you rather than dying sooner in battle. He is ancient as far as their lifespan goes. How old? About 3 months."

"But he can't die! But what do I do without him? I don't want to go back to using my cane all the time. I can only walk without it because Kai-san is there to help. I can't use my chakra all the time. It's too tiring. I need him!"

She sniffled and choked on her sobs, her hand remaining over her beloved friend in an irrational attempt to protect him.

Shino wasn't sure what to do. He had never had to deal with a crying woman before. Hinata was the only woman he spent any time with and he couldn't recall her ever crying in his presence. He was at a loss of what to do and felt he must take control of the situation. Her sobs were tearing through his heart in a way that made him both angry and sympathetic. He wanted her to stop crying not because it made him uneasy but more so because he could see the pain he had caused her.

He considered his options quickly. He had thought of a worst case scenario if she took the news badly and he was confident that his plan would work well in his favor if all went smoothly.

"There may be another way."

Sachi paused in her sniffling to wipe at her cheeks and ask, "what do you mean?" Despite the tears, her voice sounded hopeful.

He took her right wrist, gently pulling it away to reveal the vigilant insect on the look out for what disturbed its mistress. He coaxed it forward to his hand with assurances to return it to it's home. Her left hand caught his wrist as the insect climbed onto his finger. Her small hand couldn't even encircle his whole wrist.

"What are you going to do?" she whispered with fear and worry in her soft voice. She didn't like being separated from Kai-san like this. He had become a permanent fixture in her life and she suddenly felt vulnerable and naked without the gentle tickle of his legs on her skin.

"I will return him. He won't remain in this world for more than a few days. But," he added hastily when her lips turned down in a grimace, "there is still time for him to procreate. Within the week the eggs will hatch and you may have one."

"But if they only live 3 months won't you have to continually replace them for me?"

"Not exactly. A male only lives a maximum of 3 months. A female kikai can live up to a year. But this does mean you will have to work harder to keep insects from flocking to you. The males will have a tendency to follow the females."

"I'll work harder. I promise!" With most of her sorrow dissipated she smiled at him. If this was the reward he would gladly take the upcoming consequences.

"It will take them some time." He summoned a female and let them scurry off to do as he instructed.

"Not that I'm complaining but why is it that you can't just give me any female? Does it really have to be from Kai-san?"

"Just like any species traits will be passed down to offspring. Kai-san's offspring will have a stronger instinct to protect you as well as an increased bond between you both. While the bond you share with Kai-san is strong, he had a will to be able to defy you."

"Like when I first told him to go back to you and he refused?"

"Exactly. A kikai born of one you are already attuned to will be more willing to obey your commands."

"I guess that makes sense." Sachi yawned and relaxed against the tree next to him. "What time is it?"

"Late. the sun has already set."

"I must be getting better at this if I used my chakra for that long."

"It is because you were using less in your observations today."

She hummed her response and sighed tiredly. "Can you see the stars?" she asked.

Shino peered over his glasses. Bright lights speckled the sky, dancing far out of their reach.

"Yes," he answered plainly.

"Are they really as special as everyone says? Are they that beautiful?"

"I suppose so."

"How do they make you feel?" She yawned again and leaned her head on his shoulder. He looked down at her. It was strange how easily she touched him in such innocent ways. It was as if she truly didn't care about the insects under his skin. It thrilled him.

Shino wasn't prone to perform eloquent speeches about the wonders of the universe. But she had asked him a question and found he was unwilling to deny such a simple request to a woman that was so sweet and kind to him. Perhaps the endorphins caused by her touch were to blame but he felt close to her in a way he had never felt with anyone else.

"Most feel infinitesimally small when they stare into space," he answered softly.

"I know what most say about it. But what do you feel when you look at it?"

He turned his eyes back to the sky and searched for an honest answer to her question.

"I feel there are wonders both great and small that exist for our enjoyment and too often we spend our lives looking in the wrong direction."

She hummed sleepily. Using so much chakra in one day was wearing on her. It took very little time for her to fall asleep on him. In such a calm atmosphere he wasn't surprised. His kikai shifted excitedly at the proximity. He wasn't entirely sure if it was the proximity to her chakra or if they simply echoed his own peaceful feelings of her resting against him.

He was about to quiet the swarm when she hummed sweetly and pressed against his side to seek more contact. Her glasses lay askew on her face allowing a downward view of her closed eyes. Shino could see her long eyelashes that dusted the top of her cheeks as she napped against him. His own eyes softened at the view.

The two insects flew back to their masters and Shino pondered waking her up. He needn't have bothered. As Kai-san buzzed his descent on her head and landed she shot up and hovered a hand over her beloved insect.

His heart warmed strangely seeing a woman not only accepting but attuned to the kikai. He had never seen anyone care for an insect so much, not even in his clan of bug masters. They respected them, yes. But they never formed such a dangerously temporary attachment.

Through such a small gesture Shino could see a glimpse into her soul. She had a love and respect for all life great and small. He had never met an individual that embodied the phrase "couldn't hurt a fly" more than her.

"I will take you home. Your chakra supply is low. It would be unwise to continue to use it until tomorrow."

"Yeah. You're right. Would you mind leading me back? It's not easy navigating in the woods."

"Of course." She took his arm and he proceeded to lead her back the way they came.

"It's a shame I can't use my chakra now. I'll bet I could find my way in the dark better than you could." She smiled at her little quip.

It was not pitch black. The light of the moon was more than enough to go by especially for a shinobi.

He stopped at the base of the steps to her home and she squeezed his arm once before letting go.

"I don't know how to thank you enough for what you're giving me. Kai-san is more than just an insect. He is more like freedom."

She stepped close, closer than most would find comfortable. He felt a weak wave of her chakra passing over his face as she leaned in. Her hand raised to gently capture his chin between her small fingers, using it as an anchor for placement.

Shino was sure he knew what she was trying to do and stood eerily still as his head dipped low. He could see her cheeks blazing an adorable shade of red even in the semi-darkness. There was an impossibly small nervous smile upon her lips as she stood on her toes. Shino's eyes blinked rapidly as she approached as if any number of them would clear her from his vision. His lips parted slightly in surprise and his hands removed themselves from his pockets in anticipation.

His own cheeks heated slightly, disappointed but undeniably pleased at the unexpected placement of her lips on his cheek. He couldn't help but think that at this proximity she would surely feel the heat of his cheeks beneath her lips. He closed his eyes, enjoying the tingling feeling of her skin against his, her soft cheek brushing the corner of his mouth. She pulled away far too quickly for his liking. It left him strangely unsatisfied and suddenly very desired as if it only took one woman for him to realize that he wanted to be wanted by someone.

"Thank you, Shino, for everything." She left him in the street with more on his mind than he would ever admit to.

Yes. He certainly did want to be wanted. Who wouldn't?

Without even trying this woman seemed to awaken a softer side of him. He had no delusions that he wanted to be with her in a romantic fashion. He would never have spent so much time and risked so much with his clan if he was not interested in her at all.

It was no secret that relationships within the Aburame clan were strained at best. So few people could even be in the same room with an insect without screaming and claiming their disgust.

Even the few that were unafraid did not seem to covet a relationship with a shinobi known to house insects within their body.

Shino had held no rose colored delusions growing up. He knew in all likely hood he would end up in an arranged marriage. As the clan heir, he would be required to take his father's position as the leader and produce an heir of his own sometime in the near future. He had all but resigned himself to a loveless marriage and life. Even if he did find a woman to love him, he assumed his luck would have it that she would be incompatible or from her own clan line that would not allow them to be together.

Sachi seemed all too good to be true. Not only was she unafraid of insects but she held a respect for them equal to or greater than himself. With the kikai's unrestrained desire for her it was clear her genetics were compatible with that of himself and his clan. She also did not belong to a clan, leaving her free to marry whomever she chose.

But all of the cold and calculated details didn't matter. She was without a doubt a good woman. She was unreservedly kind and empathetic. She understood things about him that others could not. She knew what it was like to be different and she did not pity him for his pessimistic views he knew others had about him.

He had spent much of his youth observing others. The way that couples so freely touched each other left him slightly jealous that he would never have that as he operated under the assumption that no one would want to touch him for their disgust of the insects he housed.

But Sachi seemed to give it no second thought. There was not even the slightest tremor in her hands as she touched him in such innocent ways such as a hand on his arm. It was subtle but it told him that she was not doing it only to prove that she can; to prove that she could overcome feelings that held her back. She simply desired to be near him. She held his arm or shook his hand just as easily as she hugged her mother or ruffled her brother's hair.

There was nothing Sachi had to overcome in her friendship with him. She enjoyed her time with him. He didn't need to ask to know that. With her honest personality and candid speech he was sure to know if she didn't want him around.

When she had learned of the disgust others felt for him she did not simply state "that's how people are." Instead, she had proved to him that not everyone thought of him in the same way. Despite the fact that they could not correct everyone on their views, the two did not have to agree with what the masses thought about them both.

Though he had never thought about it, he had operated under the assumption that all blind people required much help in their daily lives. But Sachi had proved to be very self sufficient and her natural aptitude for chakra control had surprised him. And revelations about her were enlightening him, proving to him more and more every day that even his own assumptions about himself were wrong. He was not nearly as stoic and cold as he portrayed. He learned he had a softer side to himself that he had never known.

His lips curved upward in a semblance of a smile. He had never thought of himself as a know-it-all or an arrogant, proud man incapable of admitting his oversights but with all the times she had unintentionally proved him wrong he was beginning to wonder if he was quite as analytical and realistic as he thought. It was a very humbling experience.

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Sachi had managed to suppress her nervous jitters until she was safely tucked away in her room. She could hardly believe she did that! She buried her face in her hands and groaned.

Shino probably thought of her as such a frivolous, innocent thing now that she had kissed him on the cheek. She had so desperately wanted to kiss his lips but she hadn't had the courage to do so. He hadn't shown her anything but friendship since they met, despite her mother brashly stating otherwise.

She wanted Shino to know she was interested in him and now she feared she had given him mixed signals. A kiss on the cheek was the sort of thing friends and family do.

Now she wasn't even sure how Shino felt about her. She had assumed he thought of her as a friend but when she had leaned in close she could hear his heart beat faster and his kikai shifted restlessly. The sharp intake of breath he took when her lips pressed against his skin was confusing. She wasn't quite sure if it was surprise or any number of other emotions that caused it.

She dressed for bed and thumped down on the mattress, too tired to care about laying down properly. She reached a hand out to her clock while she buried her face in her pillow. 11:14, it read. They had certainly been out late, no wonder she was tired.

The short nap she took at the pond wasn't long enough to help her at all. Even so, she appreciated the warmth and comfort Shino had provided. It was lovely to hear and feel the vibration of the insects within him as they lulled her to sleep. He made her feel safe even in the middle of the woods.

She could tell he was a good man at heart with a hard exterior, something she knew shinobi strived to become. He was kind to her and had a few strange quirks that she found endearing. She would have to try harder in the future to make sure he knew what she wanted from him.

She turned her head to the side breathing deeply to replenish the oxygen in her lungs from the time she held her face in her pillow. She fell asleep with thoughts of Shino playing in her mind.

Feel free to tell me how much you hate or love being teased.