Cartwright looked at Kirk suspiciously. "What are you talking about, Jim?"

A million stories threatened to spill out. Kirk bit his tongue and reminded himself that Cartwright could not be trusted completely. "Lance, you're going to need to trust me on blind faith. We are still under attack and with no clear way to win. We might keep the Thyrians away, we might not. But I might have a way to stop this completely."

Interest sparked in Cartwright's eyes. It was pure excitement like the admiral found some dirt on Kirk. Cartwright was onto something, all right, and he felt that he had Kirk in his grasp. But he wasn't going to admit the whole truth about himself and Alyssa and how the Synprilox mission turned out. Everybody's name was going to stay clean, even Chancellor Amelia Synprilox. Kirk would make sure of that.

"You wanted me to be a part of the delegation," Kirk continued. He took the spotlight off of Cartwright. "You also wanted me to present some perspective since I dealt with parties like the Thyrians, when all diplomacy broke down. But this is different. Nobody understands this situation as much as I do. Nogura has probably fifty ships out there, minimum. It seems like he wants the many sacrifice. I prefer the one – me."

"Pretty," Cartwright allowed. "It was gallant of you to think of those capable ships and crews defending this end of the galaxy, Jim. The answer is no. No captain cannot take you onboard. Unless you have a legitimate reason why you alone can handle this hostile attack, I cannot endorse you leaving."

There was only one playing card left and it didn't involve Alyssa much. There was the device Lori left behind. Kirk felt bitter about lying to Cartwright about the issue, since it indirectly involved him, but there was no choice anymore. He took out the copy of the files Spock transferred from his pocket and threw it on Cartwright's desk. When he reached for it, Kirk's hand darted out and almost slapped it away.

"Recent developments," Kirk revealed mysteriously. This was the best way to deflect any attention elsewhere. "All of the information was recorded throughout Captain Elma's investigations and her tenure at Synprilox by Admiral Lori Ciana. As you know, she worked hand-in-hand with Admiral Ciana before the untimely…transporter accident a few years ago."

"Where was this found?" Cartwright asked. He was skeptical that Kirk was telling the truth and sought to probe further.

Kirk was flustered by the simple questioning. "Does it matter now, Lance? The problem is that the Thyrians are looking for revenge. Admiral Ciana told it all here. They had been allies with Synprilox before the Federation took control. Synprilox had been trading with Thyria. Once the Federation set their terms and Synprilox agreed, Thyria was thrown to the wayside. The material that was mined had been used for weapons. Synprilox was not the only one who used it. The minerals also created a radiation that has been slowly killing thousands, if not millions, of people."

Cartwright was shocked. "Jim, this would change everything." He almost spluttered out his words, so difficult was it for the admiral to talk. "This was not some random attack. The odd occurrences were not a coincidence. This was planned out."

"Yes, Lance! The Thyrians have used the old hostilities towards Starfleet and the Federation. They shared this sentiment with dissidents on Synprilox that did not make it to Keplar III. In turn, these people blamed us for the isolation. They took their anger out on Starfleet and the Federation. They had some right to."

"I understand, Jim. In retaliation, I suppose that the Thyrians used the radiation on Synprilox and declared an open war without anybody detecting who they are."

"Lance, I was one of the only Starfleet officers who was there, from beginning to end. You have to understand above all why I need to be the only one to communicate with the Thyrians."

"Yes, I see that." Cartwright recovered himself and stood up. "The answer remains the same. It will not change unless you comply with one condition."

Kirk hid his disappointment. "What is it?"

"You answer this one question. This will be the last time I ask you. Did you or did you not have a relationship with Captain Elma?"

The question almost knocked Kirk off of his feet. Previously, he easily brushed it off and managed to piss Cartwright off even more. It wasn't hard to lie about Alyssa. Now, he was on the spot and this meant life or death. Cartwright was giving him one more chance to not lie. But there was a loophole. Kirk saw it and took advantage of it.

"Anybody who stayed with Captain Elma easily had a connection with her," Kirk said with a smile. "Mine was filled with warmth and laughter. She trust me with her life and her children's. I trust her with mine."

Cartwright thought that he had something. His dark eyes lit up. "I see."

Kirk patiently waited to see what else Cartwright would do and say. He hoped that the admiral would keep his end of the bargain. Doubt gnawed at Kirk though. Cartwright was doing nothing and seemed to be keeping everything in suspense, standing there thinking. In the end, after an uncomfortable silence, he nodded at Kirk.

"I'll notify Captain Styles," he informed Kirk. "One wrong move and we'll be transporting you out. If I don't see results, I'll personally see you in the stockade. Understand?"

"Of course, Lance. Now, if you don't mind, I do want to bring Riley with me."

"And he can stay with Styles too. Is that clear?"

"Crystal clear, Lance. You have my word that this will be resolved."

"Good." Cartwright paused. "We'll talk more about this issue about Captain Elma later."

Kirk did not want to talk with Cartwright about Alyssa, Ryder and Ali. The wound was too sore and he could not stand the salt being rubbed on it. He had other things to focus Easily, he pushed the image of the black-haired beauty from his mind. Seeing her in Sickbay in her state was enough to break his heart. Worse was leaving behind the children.

While Cartwright notified the Transporter Room, Kirk took his chances and hurried away before the admiral changed his mind. Riley followed closely behind with a quizzical look on his face. He heard the conversation between the admirals and stood there quietly as they argued. He would have defended Kirk until the end and even lied for him, even though it was true that Kirk and Elma had an affair. That was not the point here.

Riley did not see the sense of him coming with the admiral. It could some outrageous plan nobody had to know yet. But Riley was sure that the admiral had this down pat. There was no chance in losing.

Right?

They entered the Transporter Room and quickly took their places just as the orders came from Cartwright. The next thing they knew, they were on the transporter pad of the Kelvin. Styles was already there to greet them, twisting his rod in his hands, but Kirk waved it all away. Ceremony did not matter to the admiral. He considered saving their end of the universe payment enough.

"Status report!" Kirk barked as he disembarked from the platform. Riley followed closely behind him.

Styles was startled to hear the request. He recovered quickly, twisting his blonde moustache. "Admiral, the Thyrians have been driven –"

"I'm looking to see if they're still within our galaxy," Kirk amended rudely.

"Well, yes, Sir, they are."

"And how much more manpower do we need to drive them back to the edge of it? How many more ships are in the quadrant? How many more can come to our aid?"

"They are five more ships on their way, Sir."

"Keep them in the rear, Captain. Open a channel to their leader."

Styles was outraged. Bad enough that he was outranked on his own ship and ordered around like a junior officer. Worse, he had to take orders from an admiral who hardly logged a starhour in twelve years and did not understand their enemy. He twirled his customary baton in his hands and tried his best not to scream in frustration.

He had to say something though. "Admiral Kirk, we cannot –"

"Captain Styles, are my orders going to be countered or are they going to be obeyed?" Kirk eyed Styles gravely. He was annoyed with the captain already. "You are already jeopardizing this mission. This will mean life or death to our world as we know it. I would be loath to have to report this to Admiral Cartwright if there is anything left of it."

Styles took the hint. While he resolved to bring this up later, he took note of the scenario and nodded. "It will be done as you wish, Admiral. Three minutes, open communications will be on the bridge."

Kirk and Riley shadowed him there. The admiral did not think that the captain would succeed in reaching anyone in the Thyrian party and almost laughed at the absurdity of Styles now bending backwards to accommodate him under the threat of dealing with Cartwright. But something bothered Kirk too. On his way to the bridge, his memory caught up with him. Images of a dark dungeon underground filled them. Alyssa was there too, questioning a man who claimed to be one thing and was another.

He pushed them way through them. It was not the time to go back into the past just yet. It was a luxury he could not afford at this time.

"Admiral on the bridge!" a helmsman called out when they arrived.

"At ease," Kirk orderly sharply ordered. He turned to the communications officer to his right. "Are we able to reach the Thyrian party?"

"Yes, Sir," he replied quickly. "The Thyrian leader, Ghanstan, is requesting to speak with you specifically."

Typical.

Kirk stood in the center behind the captain's chair, facing the front. "Put it on screen."

The Thyrian poised himself in the same stance as the admiral. Ghanstan was oddly glad to see Kirk though. His smile was malicious and victorious all at once, but he changed it at once. He placed his green hands behind his back in his gesture of contemplation.

"It seems like we're at an impasse, Kirk," he announced. "What piece on the board is going to break the stalemate?"

"We can talk about this on your ship," Kirk offered "Break off your attacks. Leave this galaxy. It's me you want, not the rest of civilization here."

Ghanstan measured this gesture carefully. "Considering you have destructed one of my vessels already, Admiral, I cannot just 'break off' this attack you speak so viciously of. You made the first move many years ago. We shall make the last."

The admiral had to think fast. His instinct told him that the Thyrians did not care about the individuals, but total annihilation of everyone, and he had to think along their lines. "How much more satisfying will it be if I watched this with you?"

"What an interesting concept, Admiral." Ghanstan appeared considerate. "It will be worth my while. Prisoners do not last forever either."

Ghanstan conferenced with some people in the background in their language. The group was tight-knit, but their expressions were open. They did not like what was happening and argued with Ghanstan. Kirk wasn't sure if this meant that his suggestion was accepted or not or that Ghanstan was trying to gainsay them. However, he understood one thing: his escape and a destroyed ship did not go unnoticed. The Thyrian was going to punish him for the transgression. It would not be just watching his world crumble.

Just like their only escaped citizen, all those years ago. She had to be punished somehow. Her children and grandchildren will suffer the consequences.

Ghanstan returned to the center of the screen. "I think we've got all that we require, Kirk. Prepare for death."

The admiral would have protested and asked the meaning of the statement, but did not get the chance to. He soon felt the familiar sensation of being beamed. The last thing he saw was Styles moving to call for security and yelling in frustration. The image reappeared as he landed on the Thyrian ship, near Ghanstan. Next to him to share the death sentence was Riley.

Kirk was horrified. No! He wasn't supposed to come with me!

Ghanstan faced them. "Now that I have your undivided attention, Admiral, there are some thing we need to discuss. Come. Let us act lie civilized beings for once."

~00~

Alyssa worked well into the night, trying to find more answers about Ghanstan. Because she had found nothing except a few recent chapters, she sent some of her people out to research. Her men had exhausted every lead they had and found nothing more than the interrogation and some records from twenty plus years ago and that was little to go on. Ghanstan was another immigrant of many who settled on Synprilox, nothing more.

This terrified her. Questions of the worst sort rolled in her mind about Ghanstan. This person was a Freedom Rider and in the center of government affairs. He had been the most vocal and vicious of the bunch the chancellor had dealt with. It was surprising that he part of a conspiracy to murder and those reasons eluded the investigators. Alyssa knew there was a larger loop somewhere and it had to do with the attackers above their heads. There wasn't anybody who was going to tell her otherwise.

The security officer had other worries too. The worst of all was her personal life. Alyssa was terrified of what Admiral Ciana was going to do with her. The investigation and what Ghanstan's intrusion meant aside, Lori was sure to see through the façade that Alyssa was holding up. She was crumbling under the heavy weight Synprilox dealt her and did not have relief. She cast medical leave aside like a cloak and continued to work without sleep or rest.

Also, she had taken Kirk's affections from Admiral Ciana and was having his child. Lori Ciana was not a forgiving sort. She made her intentions about Kirk plain (as far as the rumors went). She used him for her own gain. It didn't get her anywhere with Nogura yet, as far as Alyssa was concerned. It didn't change that she was still Alyssa's superior and could make her life a living hell.

How much worse can this be?

She had to make her report and face the music. She was long overdue and had ignored contacting the admiral for weeks because of recent developments. Excuse erupted in her head. Alyssa dismissed every one of them. She resolved that she'll work the conversation through as best as she could. Kurt had taught her how to be a good officer. She had his example to use.

In the late afternoon, when Kirk was busy with the other delegates, she snuck away from her work. She wasn't able to go home for this private conversation and sought any console in the palace that would serve her needs. After talking with the chancellor, she found a solution. Amelia offered her the one in her personal office. While Alyssa knew that it was monitored the most, she still accepted it.

Lori answered almost immediately and sighed. "Commander, it's been a while. Why have you lapsed in reporting to me?"

"My apologies, Admiral," Alyssa said, gritting her teeth. She almost spat out that communication was a two-way street, but stilled those words and smiled pleasantly. "Things have been very busy here."

"Define 'busy', Commander." Lori turned her attention to another screen and typed something into it. "This had better be good."

"There has been murder, Admiral," the security officer replied gravely. "Starfleet officers have been killed."

"What?!" This caught Lori's interest. She did not face Alyssa though, only showing concern typical of officers. "What do you mean?"

"The local festivities turned up a discontented Freedom Rider," Alyssa explained weakly. "We have no other information."

"How the hell can there be no information about a member of the council?"

"I don't know, Ma'am, but we're looking into it. My men and I are using all time and resources. We also are rotating shifts to protect Admiral Kirk."

Lori peered at Alyssa carefully now. "Commander, have you even taken your medical leave yet?"

"No, Admiral, I have not. Things have been a little…well, they have been hectic with Admiral Kirk's visit. I have been monitoring his overall activities and ensuring that all Starfleet and Federation interests are present on Synprilox. Duty over self."

"Remember that duty, Commander. You hold everything in your hands."

"Of course, Admiral. I will never forget."

"And take some leave, will you? I do not want a sick security officer on my hands anymore. It's bad enough seeing you with the radiation. If the situation is as bad as it is and the attacks continue, I might send Admiral Kirk back in a few months. You said there was a colony for refugees. Is that right?"

"Yes, Admiral, there is. As soon as I finish this latest mystery, I will follow your advice."

"I can tell." Lori's eyes flashed disgust for a moment. She changed the topic suddenly. "When a love affair sours, you have to do everything you can to survive. Ciana out."

Immediately, the admiral cut off the communication. Alyssa was relieved in many ways that it went better than expected and that she kept her tongue. However, that last comment stung her, more than Lori's blatant statements about where her loyalties should lay. Lori knew something that she kept close to her heart and was supposed to be confined to the medical team on Synprilox. Alyssa thought that she kept her condition from the radiation quiet enough. With a sinking heart, she realized that it also means that Lori had knowledge of her pregnancy, but perhaps not who she was having an affair with.

I doubt it. Anybody who saw us would know.

Alyssa stood up. Her legs shook like Jell-O and her head spun. She almost fell forward, but managed to use the desk in front of her as support. She waited a few minutes before the feeling passed.

There was still one task left to her today. She remembered that she still had to meet Kirk and bring him back to his quarters. She hoped that they can talk and work some things out. If Lori knew her secret, then she was bound to tell him eventually. She had to prevent that, advice from the chancellor be damned. Kirk had a right to know and make decisions with her.

She left the office without a visible trace of illness. Immediately, she found her way to the council chamber and waited outside until Kirk emerged. She dismissed the guards behind him and took control. The two walked quickly to Kirk's rooms and closed the doors behind them.

Alyssa glanced left and right, paranoid. She felt that everybody knew. Somehow, their secret got out and she was going to be forever scared for their lives. There were always people who were discontented with change and thought nothing was done for them. There was always an assassin, ready and willing to poison, stab and shoot. And if there were more people like Ghanstan, there was going to be trouble.

She checked every corner and swept the area for microphones and other listening devices. She found the one that she knew was connected to the chancellor's office. She flipped the switch off and disconnected the wire gently. She figured that Amelia will understand. She'll explain everything to her later.

Kirk was mildly amused by the inspection "Think we're safe now, Commander?" he joked.

Alyssa faced him. Tears filled her eyes. She did not expect such a silly comment to bother her so much. She wiped her face with her tan sleeve.

The admiral was too cautious to make a move. He went with the most neutral question. "Is there anything wrong?"

"Oh, Jim." Alyssa rushed over and clung to him.

Kirk thought that this was uncharacteristic of Alyssa. She had panic attacks and anxiety that plagued her and even depression that hung over her head. When she overcame it, she was coolheaded, calculating and sometimes coldhearted. For her to childishly hold onto him like that was disconcerting.

He returned with gesture with hesitation and pressed Alyssa's head against his shoulder. He found this was a mistake. His uniform was soon soaked with Alyssa's tears

She started mumbling things into the cloth. At first, they were only grunting sounds without any meaning. Then, jumbles of words spilled out and were strung along randomly and then with some sense. She talked about their safety and then something about Synprilox. There was a mention of Keplar III and how much she yearned to be there. She added in something about enemies, their positions and the relationship.

Kirk could not make out the whole meaning. He tried listening closely and soon found an incomprehensible story of woe. Then, he put the chapters in order. Yet, he did not find the root problem. He tried again.

It was when Alyssa talked about children. Kirk froze and gripped the back of her shirt tighter. All of a sudden, it made sense. Everything fell into place…and their lives just fell apart and shattered into a million pieces.

Kirk felt like he was struck hard. He did not know how to respond. He allowed Alyssa to continue her ranting. As it grew louder and more understandable, he hoped that nobody heard beyond his doors. But even Alyssa realized that she was worsening. She softened the blow and controlled her tears. The secret was no longer with her. Kirk now knew.

When Alyssa had calmed down a minute later, Kirk separated from her and sat on the nearby bed. He put his head into his hands, trying to process the revelation. It was utterly impossible. He was devastated and it wasn't because he was going to be a father. Their careers were going into two different directions and he couldn't do anything about it. He wasn't even going to be on Synprilox for much longer and Alyssa was exiled to the dying world.

Alyssa did not know what to do. Her misery was spent. She thought about comforting him instead of catering to her private pity party, but she was waved away. She waited a few minutes before inching forward. This time, Kirk took her into his arms. She was relieved. He wasn't angry, just surprised. She could deal with that.

"What are we going to do?" Kirk asked her gently. "You can't leave Synprilox yet."

"No," Alyssa conceded. "Lori Ciana will have my ass, Jim. She loves my work and uses me, but she will keep Starfleet's secrets if she has to. Leaving me here to rot and cheating Synprilox is one of her many talents."

He ignored the jab. "I love you, Alyssa. I cannot leave you now."

"You have to, Jim. We might not have a choice. I cannot hold you back. This isn't going to look good with Starfleet and Synprilox. I can make lame excuses and hold my own. I cannot afford to lose you."

"You cannot tell a man to stay way from his own child!"

"And you can't believe that Lori Ciana will accept this new change in your career. You cannot marry me, Jim. Even if this went past Starfleet – the model of military tradition and acceptance of all sorts of practices – then Synprilox will not accept it. You are well known as a savior and a slave master. Anything can be used against you. A child is the easiest tool of an enemy, especially your own. One of mine can be hidden. Don't you see that?"

"What the hell do you expect me to do, Alyssa? Stay away and pretend it all never happened? That we're chaste and just an admiral and a commander? You might be alone and –"

"Die?" Alyssa laughed bitterly. "I do not fear death, Jim. The Grim Reaper is my friend. Dammit, I risk my life everyday. I am a security officer. I am not supposed to last long. This disease will probably kill me long before a phaser or a knife will."

Kirk was disturbed by her bluntness, but saw the sad reality of their situation. He had to shake away the morbidity. "Promise me something," he demanded. His voice shook.

"Anything." Alyssa could not deny him.

"Always keep me in the loop," Kirk stipulated. "I understand…I see why I have to stay away. I cannot accept it. I don't want to. But our lives are at a great divide. Mine is on Earth. Yours is here on Synprilox. Nobody is going to transfer me here and you are having a hard time leaving. At this point in our lives, we do not have room for a family together."

"I'll die here, Jim," Alyssa whispered. "I'll be another body. But the children will be safe. I swear."

"No. I will get you all out of this situation." Kirk was sure of his vow. "It may take me years, Alyssa, but you will never have to worry again. We will be together. I promise you that."