Just as Hannah had guessed, Clifford was one the covered bridge that connected one hospital building to the next. He was watching the people on the street below, coming from or going to wherever they were needed the most.
At least things were normal where August, Aurora, Lucy, and Olivia were concerned. It was good to have some stability.
The rest of the day had gone to hell in a hand-basket.
Clifford was trying figure out how to dig himself out of the JJ-shaped hole he'd fallen into, and he had yet to wholly digest the discovery of Hannah's pregnancy. Becoming a dad again at the age of seventy—especially when he was already a grandfather—was a hard concept to swallow. He wished his family could be some kind of normal. But no. On top of everything else, Katherine was missing, and Sandy was in town. What?
"There you are."
Clifford's thoughts were interrupted by Sandy's voice.
It was all he could do to not roll his eyes. "Yes, Alexandra?"
"Using my full name again, huh?" she sneered. "How did you not recognize Jenny? She looks like I did when we met!"
"I didn't recognize her because it was already a big enough surprise to see you after twenty-five years." Clifford shot back. "I have rather a full plate right now: Hannah and I were also blindsided by something at the doctor's office today. At least she was pleased after a few minutes. I'm enough of a man to admit that I didn't take it well."
Sandy not amused. "Is Hannah talking to you?"
"No. She said she won't talk to me until there's an update on Katherine, or I start giving believable apologies."
"For God's sake—what happened?"
Clifford paused. Though he and Sandy had been divorced for so long, he still knew that his answer was going to deliver some kind of blow. Hannah would also probably be irritated with him for telling… but it was better to seek forgiveness than ask permission.
Sandy pounced when Clifford was quiet for a little too long. "How old is Hannah?"
Clifford found his voice. "She's forty-six."
Sandy was relieved when her quick mental math about dates and facts checked out. By her calculations, she hadn't been cheated on because Clifford and Hannah had gotten together after the divorce. No fat had been to the fire. She then shifted into trying think of what could make her former husband so squirrelly.
Then she got it. "Clifford, is Hannah pregnant?"
"She is." came the blunt reply.
Sand didn't feel angry—only annoyed. "And that's why you reacted badly?"
"Can you blame me?"
In that moment, Sandy felt like what little goodwill she had been willing to show Clifford was no longer necessary. His jab of an inquiry had gotten under her skin. Sandy had also carried this man's children before. Things had gone quite wrong during the last time, however. Sandy found that she was very much Team Hannah."
"I can, do, and will blame you!" Sandy snapped. "Just give Hannah the apology that she's owed!"
Clifford stomped his foot. "We have grown children, and two grandchildren—the last thing we need is to go backwards, after all this time!"
"Backwards? You may be 'over the hill,' but your wife still has a long life ahead of her. Why can't you just be happy?"
Clifford was all too aware of how petulant his next words were. "The plans we had for her early retirement have been totally canned now. And why do you care so much?"
"Even though Hannah is partially responsible for keeping Jenny from her brother and sister, she's pregnant. I can be mature about this whole thing because I'm willing to try, so how about you?" Sandy put her hands on her hips. "It's not like we're going to be best friends, but the kid that Hannah is carrying is as much related to Jenny as August and Katherine are. Jenny would never forgive me if I didn't make some kind of effort."
"Then what do you suppose I would have to do so I could get into our daughter's good graces?"
"Ask her."
"Fine." he huffed. "Are you sure that asking me about recognition abilities is all you want to ask?"
Sandy heard the underlying theme of his town, and she didn't like it. "I've already done the math about when you made your second family!"
"All of it?"
"Quit stirring pots that don't need stirring—unless you really want to keep being a jerk just for me. Lord knows you're good at it."
She was challenging him at every turn, and he knew it. This was how their more terrible fights had always begun.
"It's fine that you care about Hannah, but why do you care so much about a baby that is in zero ways related to you?" Clifford pressed. "You've always been attached to kids—even after we were parents, and after Jenny. I can't be the only one between the two of us who can be blamed for the dissolution of our marriage. One occasion in particular comes to mind."
Sandy felt both a sucker punch and anger. She remembered with too much ease the 'occasion' he was talking about. It had been a truly terrible day. She couldn't believe that he was choosing now of all times to bring it up. Anger surged through Sandy's body because she'd let her guard down—after a quarter of a century apart, Clifford still had the capacity to be a jerk. Not all wounds could heal completely.
Sandy's first impulse was to slap Clifford across the face, but that would have undone her points about taking the high road.
"How dare you bring up that day! I didn't exactly make our last baby by myself, did I?"
"Have you ever told Jenny that she was almost a big sister back then?"
Sandy's tone was begrudging. "No."
"Then don't throw all of your stones at me today, Alexandra." Clifford said coolly. "Jenny is going to have to learn some time that she has a baby sibling in Heaven."
Sandy sighed. Clifford was right.
Meanwhile, Emily's thoughts were torn between wanting to pour all her energy into finding Katherine and the missing children, talking with Andrew, and crawling into bed so she could sleep for a week. Why did things have to be so complicated? She loved her job and would never leave it for anything, but being the leader could be a real bummer sometimes. It was like the weight of the world was on her shoulders alone.
Emily found both of JJ's parents talking together on the otherwise empty covered bridge. But it sounded more like they were hissing at each other.
What bad luck for Emily to arrive in time to hear them discussing their third child.
She cleared her throat noisily. Sandy and Clifford both jumped.
"Emily, how long have you been there?" Sandy said in surprise.
The agent scrambled for a fast answer. "Just long enough to know that JJ has been a middle child for longer than she's known."
"And are you going to tell her?"
Emily's burden of secrets grew even heavier. "Uh-uh. My lips are sealed."
"Smooth. What did you need?"
"To have a chat."
Clifford straightened himself out. "Then allow me to go…"
"Actually," Emily said in a firm tone. "I need to speak with both of you."
"About Katherine's case?" he guessed, staying put.
"Partly. I've just spoken with Hannah, and she told me that Katherine came to D.C. with Olivia because the support group here has childcare. Is there anything else you feel that I should know?"
"No. Has Hannah talked about anything besides travel patterns?"
Emily paused—she was trying now to figure out how present her next bulletin point without stepping on JJ's parents' toes, or the like.
Sandy seemed to be reading her mind. Just as JJ often did.
"I do know about Hannah's baby because I figured it out." she said reassuringly. "Take a breath. Please."
"Thank you." Emily exhaled in genuine relief. "Hannah told me about the baby, and I'm genuinely happy for her, but…"
She hesitated again as she thought about wording again. Her next statement regarded JJ time, and before her were JJ's parents. Both of them. Emily had been in many a strange position before, but never anything like this. It was new.
"But what?" Clifford prompted.
"JJ always considered me her family, and for that, I know that she's going to care what I think about her new brother or sister. She'll also care about what I think of Hannah."
"What's your point? Jenny doesn't know about the baby."
"My point, sir, is that I'm putting it out there that if anyone in the family asks me whose side I'm on, it's Hannah's." Emily said adamantly. "She's really sad already because of your bad response. I won't be moved on this matter until you apologize to your wife, and put some serious effort into making up with JJ."
"Fine. How close are you with Jenny?"
"She's the best friend I've ever had in my entire life."
Sandy said to Clifford, "Emily has always been Jenny's last line of defense between whatever her version of normal is, and insanity. It's a 'one can't survive without the other' situation."
Clifford was privately impressed by this. "Okay, but now I have a feeling that Emily has been sitting on something else. Am I wrong?"
Emily was now being looked upon by both of JJ's parents. To say that the moment was disconcerting was far from doing the feeling justice.
"No, you aren't wrong." she sighed. "I love JJ so much that when I say that we'd be dead without each other, it isn't an exaggeration. It also means that if things had gone any differently, I would have married her."
JJ's parents both stared.
Clifford wasn't sure what to say because this was turning into an absurdly long day. As for Sandy, this admission simply made her love Emily even more.
Sandy hugged her. "I always knew I liked you. Does Jenny know about what you've just told us?"
"Yes, and the feeling is mutual on her part. Will also knows." Emily said. "I actually told them both since we've been at the hospital. They took well to it, and even asked me the same favor—separately—without realizing."
"What was it?"
"Will asked me to look after JJ and the kids if anything ever happened to him."
Sandy connected the dots. "Then I suppose JJ asked you to look after Will and the kids if anything ever happens to her?"
Emily bobbed her head. "That's what happened. I told said yes to both of them without hesitation."
Right then and there, Sandy decided that she would love Emily like one of her own from then on.
"I'm so glad that Jenny knows you." she told the younger woman.
"I wouldn't be who I am without her. She's both changed my life and saved me, many times over."
Emily watched JJ's parents take in her kind words about their daughter. It was like their anger towards each other was melting right in front of her.
So she took the conversation in a new direction, approaching Clifford first, holding the LaMontagne family portrait to him.
"This is JJ's family." she explained. "Her husband said that they're going to have a chat about how much they're going to let you into their lives, but he wanted you to see the this."
Clifford took the picture and admired it. His daughter's family was beautiful.
"What's everyone's names?" he inquired.
"JJ's husband is called Will. They named their sons Henry and Michael."
"The boys look just like Jenny did when she was little." he handed the photograph to Sandy so she could see it. "Wow."
Taking the compliment as a good sign, Emily added, "Hannah mentioned that you're a retired mathematics professor. What was your specialty?"
"Geometry. Why?"
"Henry is a math genius—he's actually due to take a placement test soon to get into a higher level math class at school. I've also heard that he loves to read the works of Einstein."
Even Sandy hadn't know this, and she couldn't help remarking to her ex, "It sounds like Henry has your gift."
"It does." he agreed.
Emily spoke next with near caution. "I'm not saying that this is a promise of anything, but it's just something to keep in mind when you do decide to talk to your daughter."
Clifford nodded courteously. "Much obliged."
Emily felt butterflies in her stomach as she prepared to tell JJ's parents the rest of the news.
"These are also from the LaMontagnes." Emily handed over the sonograms. "JJ's just found out since being admitted today that she's pregnant."
At this pronouncement, JJ's parents both felt their hearts jump. Even in their strife, they could still put their feelings aside to be happy about one of their children having another child of her own. JJ was their last living accomplishment. That made her worth pausing anything for.
"JJ is having twins." Emily pointed them out on the paper. "There's a baby here, and a baby here. See?"
They did.
Sandy handed the pictures back; all she could think of was getting to her offspring. "You said Jenny is in room 305?"
"Yes." Emily confirmed. "I just need to say one more thing."
"Hm?"
"Of course you two have a history together because of your daughters, but I did also just find you two fighting. The drama needs to be put aside—just for now, alright?" Emily looked from one person to the other with dead seriousness. "Be JJ's parents and show up for her. She's laid up in bed because of a major panic attack, Hannah is just feeling distraught, and Katherine has yet to be found. Focus on what matters. Please be adults today. If not for the sake of the situation or Hannah, then at least try for JJ and Katherine. I know you both can do it."
JJ's parents knew that they were devolving into pettiness, but they also knew that Emily was right.
Clifford broke the ice. "Okay, Emily—we'll act right. Where is my wife?"
"Back in the waiting room with August, Aurora, and Olivia."
"Thank you. I'll go join them now."
He turned and left.
Sandy regarded Emily once more, and this time through the eyes of a mother. Nothing else.
"Hey, are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Emily replied blandly.
"Okay, sure." Sandy's sounded unconvinced. "Just remember that I raised two teenage daughters—I've heard 'I'm fine' in every tone, ever. Does Jenny read you very well?"
Emily nodded. "She reads me like a book, and she knows me like the back of her hand. I know her the same way."
"And you really do mean it when you'd do anything for her?"
"Yes—I dropped everything once at a posting in London to help her out of a tight spot. She's come through for me like that more than once."
Sandy surveyed Emily further. "Just don't forget that Jenny is a good person to talk to whenever you want to get whatever it is you're 'fine' about off your chest, alright?"
Emily exhaled noisily again. "Okay, Sandy. Thank you."
She gave Emily's arm a gentle squeeze. "Are you close with your parents?"
"Very, especially now that I'm living in the same country as them again. Their house is ten minutes from my building. We have dinner together there, at least once a week when I'm not on a case."
"You're a wonderful daughter." Sandy hugged her again and held her out at arm's length. "I love you because you love Jenny, Will, and the kids. You'll always have a place in my heart."
Now Emily felt like she was going to cry, just from what Sandy was telling her—but she didn't get mushy this easily. What was going on with her? Was she pregnant? Was this her hormones in hyperdrive? What she wouldn't give to have a few minutes of quiet to figure it all out.
"Just drop me a line if you ever need anything." Sandy's eyes flickered towards Emily's middle, although only for the briefest of moments before she smiled at her again. "Take care of yourself. Do you promise me that you will?"
Emily returned the smile. Yes. I promise you I will."
Sandy gave her one last hug before excusing herself so she could finally search for JJ's room. This left Emily alone on the covered bridge.
Alone, with her thoughts.
Emily held both hands to her middle, and her breath caught immediately—even through her clothes, that area of her body felt firmer to the touch than it normally did. This gave her hope.
She looked down at her middle, and stroked it with her thumbs. There just had to be a life in there.
If she was wrong, she was wrong, but for now, she was choosing to believe. It was better than not trying.
"If there's anyone in there," Emily murmured. "This is mama, and I just want you to know that I already love you. There will never be a day when I don't."
The idea of even the possibility of her own child had her mesmerized.
So she stayed there for a little bit longer.