"Kim!?" Jack calls for me as he charges up the stairs. He must be home from work.
"In my room, Jack!" I respond with a little giggle. This boy can be ridiculous. I'm also glad to see him being a little more… well, him, around me. He's been treating me like a kid since I moved in. I mean, I get that. I have been a bit crazy lately. Jack catches me cutting and then I bust open about my mom and that whole story.
"Hey," Jack says with a beaming smile, his head just peeking in my room.
"What's up?" I ask.
"Not much. Checking in on the job hunt."
"it's really not," I say with a sigh before blowing a strand of blonde hair away from my eyes. I look back up at Jack from his laptop screen to see him smiling. "What?"
"I found you a job," Jack tells me with a smug grin.
"Really? Where?!" I ask, unable to contain my excitement.
"You know the coffee shop and used bookstore downtown?"
"Of course I do!" Oh my God, he didn't!
"If you want it, you start Friday." He knows I want it. I love that place!
"That's the best news I've heard in so long!" I gush. I can feel the stupid grin on my face.
"So you'll take it?" Jack asks, his eyebrow raised.
"Of course I want that job, you long haired idiot!" I shout at him as I leap off my bed and pull him into a spine snapping hug.
"You're going to be doing a bit of everything. You'll make drinks, inventory the books and do customer service."
"That's awesome! I want to do all of that!" I can't believe Jack got me that job. It's pretty much my favorite place. "Friday, right?"
"Friday," Jack nods, his face moving my hair a little. Oh shit, I forgot I have him in a death hug.
"Sorry," I apologise sheepishly as I let him go.
"It's fine," Jack shakes off with a chuckle. "You've been trying so hard for a job, let alone one at Clay's Books and Beans." It's a stupid and clever name at the same time. What's not to love?
Jack works at the dojo doing clean up and little odd jobs for Rudy on Fridays and Saturday evenings, so it's no big deal for me to get a ride to work and home with Jack. Clay's Books and Beans is in the mall, too, so that makes it great.
I'm nervous as all hell because today's my first day. I know you guys are probably all like, 'Kim, it's a coffee shop and a bookstore,' but that's easy for you to say. I've been telling myself that since Jack told me about the job, which I still don't know how he got me, by the way. But seriously, I know it's just my head playing games and shit, but my inner voice is telling me I can't do this, that I'll just fuck it up somehow.
"By guys, have a good time at work!" Juliet tells us as she drops us off with a proud smile. She's dropped Jack off before, so why the… oh shit… she's proud of me.
"Thanks, Juliet," I tell her with a smile of my own, trying to hide how much I'm feeling right now. Again, I don't think you get it. Unless you know what it's like to never have a parent truly be proud of you and then have a role model and someone you've cared about for years all but tell you she's proud of you, how could you understand?
"Kim," Juliet calls my name quietly, stopping me with my car door half open. "You'll be fine. You got this," she smiles knowingly. I just smile back and take my leave.
As Juliet pulls away in her little green Volkswagen, I jog to Clay's Books and Beans. It's a little place, a few book shelves, a counter and five little tables. There's no such thing as a rush here. It's a used bookstore. I never know what I'll find or what'll come in.
"Hey, Kim!" Clay shouts as soon as I walk in. I've been a regular of Clay's since day one, so we're on great terms.
"Hi, Clay," I smile and wave but I'm actually trying not to die from nervousness. "How are you?"
"Absolutely wonderful!" Clay's so cheery all the time. I get the feeling that this is really his dream. "Yourself?" he asks. I follow the path of his eyes and see that he's watching my fidgeting fingers that are drumming the sides of my legs.
"I'm really nervous, to be honest." I can't tell him I'm good when he just saw the proof of my unsurity.
"You'll be fine, I promise. You've been a regular since I opened. You've helped people find their books. All you need to do is learn the coffee counter."
"I'm terrible at math."
"Kim, you're trying to psych yourself out," Clay tells me, his lips quirked to the left. I know it and so does he.
"Sorry. First job jitters," I apologise, rubbing my arm and biting my lip.
"You'll be fine," Clay tells me with a little smile. "Come on behind the counter. Make us some drinks to practice," he smiles and leads me over to the maple bar top.
"I've been trying to practice… at home." I'm still trying to get used to Jack's house being mine, too. When I say 'my house,' my dad's house comes to mind and I'm trying to shake that.
"Oh?" Clay asks me, probably looking for examples.
"I made mochas, machiotos, and I tried playing with some lattes and stuff."
"Just for you, or for Mom and Dad?"
"Jack and some friends. I've kind of been guard dogging the coffee pot and making them go through me for service," I say with a smile, looking over a stainless steel cooler door. I've seen Clay and other workers get things from down here, but that's not the same as knowing the cooler.
"Everything okay down there?" Clay asks, peeking over the counter, an eyebrow raised.
"Oh yeah," I make brief eye contact as I come back up. "What would you like?" He's probably going to ask for something I didn't mention practicing.
"Hmm…" Clay scratches his bushy red beard, his eyes focusing on the menu behind and above me, written in fancy but readable cursive in chalk on the blackboard. "Can I have a Dirty Mean Bean?"
I close my eyes and run through the back of my mind, trying to find the concoction.
"Got it!" I snap my fingers and go to work. A Dirty Mean Bean is a mocha with three shots of espresso and a cocoa powder sprinkled on the cool whip, topped with two gummy worms. Yeah. We're a fun place.
"There you go," I smile and slide Clay the drink I made while describing it.
"Let's try it." Clay picks it up and takes off the white plastic lid. "Looks good." He takes a sip and smacks his lips a few times, a thoughtful look on his face. "You pass!"
"Yay!" I almost squeal excitedly.
"How was work?" Juliet asks me when she picks up me and Jack. Jack looks at me offers me to speak first.
"It was awesome!" I tell them both, the smile on my face nearly reaching my ears. I can feel it. "It was slow, so it was a good day to train. I even got some time to do homework. I got paid to study. Jack, how was your day?" Thanks, Jack. Now back to you.
I look over to Jack, and I'm guessing by the quick jerk motion of his head and the slight blush on his face… I just caught him looking at me?
"It was alright," Jack recovers after clearing his throat. "Just the usual." Not to take away from Jack, but I don't see how it could be exciting. He does good work that needs to be done, but it can't be a lot of fun. "I was just made Rudy's partner in the dojo."
"Wait, what?" I backtrack.
"Yeah. Rudy wants me to teach his younger and beginner classes."
"Oh my God, Jack! That's amazing!" I'd hug him, but I'm going to do that thing where I overanalyze everything. I could be wrong, but I swear I caught him looking. This may not seem like a big deal, but this is me and Jack here.
"Hey Jack?" I ask quietly, feeling a little nervous about this. His door's open, but he's not home. I'm about to leave, but his bathroom door opens and there he is. In a towel. I can't do this. Not like this. "We'll talk later," I say quickly and haul ass out of there.
I close my door and go straight to bed still fully dressed. I need a break from Jack for a while, I think. I didn't know living with Jack would complicate things. Are things complicated? Am I just overcomplicating things? I really need to sleep on this.
My alarm clock goes off early. Dwayne Johnson's The Rock Clockapp wakes me up at 6:00 a.m. with his "Good Morning Sunshine" song.
I toss the light blanket and sheet off with a huge exhale. Waking up an hour early was my idea, but I don't really like it. I'm officially in Operation Dodge Jack.
With only three sit-ups, I power myself out of bed and pick out my clothes for the day before trudging to my connected bathroom that seems like a dream, given the house I grew up in.
I struggle to get the bedhead curls out of my hair before getting dressed and brushing my teeth. In no time I'm working my way down the stairs like a cat, so as not to wake the rest of the house.
I make a quick PB and J, eat a banana, and get the coffee going for Shawn and Juliet before I slip on my sneakers and head out the door.
"Yo K.C., what are you doing up so early?" Shawn's voice freezes me in my tracks.
"I'm gonna head to school early, get some homework done." What is he doing up so early?!
"Jules told me you had enough time to do it at because it was slow. Congratulations on the new job, by the way.," Shawn says with an honest smiles. He's not even pissed that he just caught me lying? "But seriously, what's up with the early Exodus, K.C.? You're not being interrogated. I'm curious."
This is Shawn, one of the coolest and most laid back people I know. He's a little hair brained and crazy, but a lot smarter than most people think because he chooses to act the fool. Anyone that really knows him knows that. If I can't talk to Shawn…
"I'm trying to avoid Jack for a little bit," I tell him straight up.
"Would that have to do with Jack's increasingly hard time dealing with his crush on you?" Shawn asks knowingly and my jaw drops. "Thought so."
"So I did catch him looking at me in the car yesterday."
"You probably did," Shawn confirms, closing the case file he probably stole from Juliet. "So…"
"I… I don't know." What do I do now? One of my best friends, the guy I'm living with, has a crush on me. I had my suspicions, but..
"It's okay, K.C. Don't feel like you have to do anything different. Don't act like Jack is going to try to pull something."
"I know he won't. I just know how much it sucks to like someone and not have them reciprocate in the same way. If you don't mind, Shawn, I'll head off to school. I think I need some girl time with Lusa."
"Sure thing, kiddo. I'll pick you up after… It's Saturday." Oh what the fuck!
I stand there keeping eye contact with Shawn and Shawn staring back. "Was this as awkward for you as it was for me?" I finally ask.
"Oh yeah," Shawn says with a chuckle.
"I made coffee."
"Just go inside," Shawn tells me, flicking his head towards the door.
"Yeah, okay," I agree quickly and scurry away.
Me and Lusa are hanging out in her room playing Mario Kart. It was nice to be told I don't have to ask to go hang out with friends. Juliet just told me to be responsible. My dad was really controlling. Just this little touch of freedom is so damn liberating!
"You alright over there, Kim?" Lusa asks me, her eyes briefly leaving the game.
"Oh yeah," I sigh as I compose what I want to say. "Night's can be pretty rough, but day to day, I'm actually doing great."
"That's good," Lusa nods before brushing a strand of long dark hair from her eye. She probably didn't expect me to open up like that, but she doesn't seem to be brought down by it or trying to avoid it.
"So living with Jack is going well?"
"It is. He's great and Shawn and Juliet are the coolest. I never thought I would be so pumped to have a job."
"That's great, Kim. I knew you'd bounce back."
"Thanks, Luse," I say happily, the race still in the front of my mind, Lusa in first and me right behind her. We always play team games because Lusa's better than me and because we've seen Talledega Knights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby a few too many times.
"Nah, but seriously… you're dad can go fuck himself. Your mom is awesome and you're a good kid. He's the wiener bag."
I can only laugh and shake my head at Lusa. Whenever I have guy problems or family issues, Lusa's always good for a video game or a movie to get my mind off things. Everybody needs a Lusa.
I walk into work and there's Clay, happy as ever. He's standing behind the counter, a drink in one hand and an open book on Marx in the other. He had a book on Senator Joe McCarthy just yesterday, so you can see the irony in that.
Yes, I'm seventeen and know who they are. That's one thing I can say about Chuck: the fucker kept me well read. He tried to get me to read a bunch of stuff on local history, but I never cared about the gold rush.
The door opens and my first customer is Jack. Clay immediately excuses himself to the backroom, leaving me to wonder what he knows and how. But then again, it is Clay…
"Hey, Kim," Jack briefly smiles and runs a hand through his hair as he looks up at the board. Who is he kidding. He's having a mocha.
I start making it while he continues to scan the board. He always does this. He'll look for five minutes and always get the medium.
"Yeah, I think I'll just have the… and you're already making it," observes aloud and I smile at him.
"What's up, Jack. I know you're not just here for coffee.
"I could be."
"But you're not."
"Okay, fine," he gives in. My anxiety is currently on red alert, folks. Jack looks around and sees it's us and one couple at the back of the little seating area by the entrance. I cross my arms and wait for him to begin.
"I talked to Shawn this morning."
"So did I."
"I know. That's what we talked about."
"So you know I know?" I ask, sliding him his drink. "That'll be $4.00 please." Jack hands me a five, I give him one back and he puts it in the tips. I smile briefly and resume my crossed arm position.
"So where does this leave us?" he asks and my answer is going to kill me once I see his reaction.
"Where we are now," I tell him quietly, biting my lip and rubbing my arm. "I'm sorry, Jack."
"Don't be. It's what I expected. I just had to know for sure," he tells me, completely emotionless and begins to walk out.
"Jack…" I weakly call after him. Jack's lack of emotion and feeling is never a good thing.
"We're cool," Jack tells me in the same dead voice as he leaves.
"You okay, kiddo?" Clay asks, coming back out, a tight lipped expression on his face.
"So you heard that?"
"Mhmm."
"All of it?"
"Mhmm. Need a hug?" Clay asks, worry in his eyes.
"I'm fine, Clay, I swear. But yeah, I'll take that hug."