Disclaimer: I don't own any familiar characters, and or anything pertaining to the world of the Hobbit. All, but my ocs, are owned by J.R.R Tolkien (who probably hates us for doing this to his work).

Chapter 37

Magdalen just wanted to be left alone. In the week since the dwarves of the grey mountain Magdalen had made her presence among the royal family scarce. She spent her mornings in the training arena with Dwalin when he was busy running security, which happened more often than not. The rest of her mornings and afternoons were spent in the library as Ori was away scribbing for the royal meeting that had proceeded in the week. Deamra would often visit her for lunch. Deamra would like and probed her asking Magdalen if she was okay. Magdalen would force a smile and tell her she never felt better. Deamra never seemed to believe her, but she left the matter alone.

In the evening she would visit with the Ur children taking them on long walks around the kingdom before they would all have dinner together. Though Poppy and Bofur never made her feel like a bother, some nights Magdalen would decline their invitation to dinner, she didn't want to intrude on family time. So she would sit under the tree in her garden, lying quietly staring up at the stars wishing more than anything she could go back in time and stop herself from kissing Fili.

Magdalen was a sensible girl. Growing up she never had an interest in romance or boys. In high school, she saw dating as a waste of time after her first boyfriend, Joe Everitt, broke her heart. When her friends would fall head over heels for a guy they had only talked to for a second, she would simply roll her eyes. She thought love was stupid. That was until she met Jack. Jack had changed her world. He was the first guy to really pay attention to her. He wasn't overly affectionate with her - which she liked- but still made her feel loved. Made her feel wanted. Then he shattered her heart. It hadn't hurt like she imagined I would, they had been together for almost two years. Yet she felt almost free after he stormed out of her life.

She never shed a tear for Jack. She had never shed a tear over a guy. Though it seemed different now.

It's not, stop moping about and get on with your life. He has. She muttered to herself as she closed the door of her apartment.

Today had been a particularly rough morning for Magdalen. The night before had been filled with nightmares and agonizing periods of sleeplessness. She had finally fallen asleep when the morning sun crept over the distant hills. In an unusual turn of events, Magdalen crawled out of bed at noon, something she hadn't done in a year. Magdalen slowly dressed for the day and slipped into the hall away wordlessly making her way to the training arena. The scowl etched on her face made anyone in her path steer clear. When she entered the training room some of the dwarves started to greet her only for their "good afternoons" to die on their lips.

Magdalen made her way to the weapons rack she grabbed a short sword.

"Girlie!" A voice snapped behind her.

Magdalen groaned, rubbing her free hand over her throbbing temple. She turned to face an angry Dwalin.

"Morning Dwalin." She lazily saluted him.

Dwalin wasn't impressed, he crossed his arms raising a thick brow. "Morning? Girlie, it's noon. You missed training." Dwalin scolded

Magdalen shrugged her shoulders, shielding her face from Dwalin's angry gaze. "I slept in Dwalin, I just needed a break for once." She muttered flipping the short sword in her hands.

Dwalin grumbled something under his breath as Magdalen turned glaring at him. "I told you a long time ago that I would stop training you if you wasted my time…." His voice trailed off in her mind when she caught sight of the figure that looked down on the training arena.

Magdalen felt a punch in her gut as looked up to see Dis, Tearsa, and Fili. Tearsa standing close to Fili, smiling up at him with love and affection. Magdalen looked away unable to keep herself from scowling. A hand covered her shoulder.

"Magdalen, are you listening to me?" There was no hint of anger in his voice as Dwalin looked upon her with pity.

Magdalen narrowed her eyes shaking off his shoulder. "Can we just train already?" She moved toward the dirt ring.

Dwalin stared after her, his eyes trailing where her sight had been set on moments ago. Above them, Fili and Princess Dis showed Tearsa around. Dwalin looked between Magdalen and Fili and felt a surge of pity. Magdalen had been off since Lady Tearsa's arrival, but so had he. Dwalin didn't trust Lord Amrus or his family. Dwalin had voiced his concern to his friend and king, but Thorin had elected to ignore it. Perhaps it was the heavy presence of Lord Amrus and his family that had thrown Magdalen off. Whatever it was Dwalin was going to help Magdalen feel better. He wouldn't admit it but he missed her charming smile and fiery soul. She remembered him so much of Freya. He had to remind himself at times that she was not his younger sister. Shaking his head Dwalin followed his young friend.

Magdalen rolled her shoulders, shaking her wrist to loosen some tension. She needed to fight, she needed to release the anger that had been building up. Dwalin stood opposite of her, his hands resting on his belt.

"Get into position." He commanded turning into her teacher rather than her friend.

"Let your senses take control," Dwalni's voice floated around her.

And so she did. Magdalen rolled her sword letting her muscles take control. She took a deep breathe listening to the space around her. Heavy footsteps pounded behind her, and with that, her body flew into fight mood. She let out a cardinal roar as she dropped to her knees, driving the hilt of the sword into the attacker's stomach. The dwarf groaned, stumbling back. Magdalen bared her teeth as she shot up. With the lightness of her footfall, she was on the dwarf in an instant. The dwarf raised his sword taking precious swings at Magdalen, which she met each time with more intensity. The dwarf before was bathed in a red haze as she let her anger take control. Her movements slowly became less structured and more feral.

"Magdalen!" A distant voice called to her.

The voice seemed to morphed between voices that were familiar and unknown. Magdalen felt lost in her mind as she just let her body fight. A rough hand jerked her away from the fight throwing her on the ground. Dwalin breathed heavily above her.

"Magdalen!" He snapped.

The visions of red faded, Magdalen stared up at Dwalin. Coming back to her senses Magdalen looked around to find all eyes on her. Her eyes shot up to look at the dwarf she had been fighting. A wave of shame smashed into, as she took in the small cuts, bruises, and dribbles of blood she had left him with. She stood up brushing away the dust, picking up her sword once again. Dwalin stared at her like she was a wild animal. She looked away from his gaze. Dwalin dismissed the dwarf thanking him for his participation.

Magdalen walked away from Dwalin, standing at the edge of the ring. She squeezed her eyes shut, pressing the tips of her fingers into her neck. Magdalen just wanted to feel okay again, she wanted to act as nothing had ever happened. Like Fili had. But in that lies the problem, Magdalen felt as if she never be important to him. Just a summer breeze passing through his fingers. She felt used, she felt broken.

"Looking for a challenge?" A voice called from behind her.

Magdalen stood upright, her spine straighter than it had ever been before. Slowly Magdalen looked over her shoulder to find Fili standing at the edge of the ring, Tearsa, and Dis standing beside Dwalin. There was a sudden deafening silence as the paired stared down each other. Magdalen could hear her heart pounding in her ear. She only stared at Fili for a moment, he wore his hair in a low ponytail. The way she had told him she had liked it weeks ago in the confinements of her garden. There she had ran her fingers through the soft locks of his hair, now all she wanted to do was pull it out.

"Well?" His voice taunting her.

Magdalen looked away, tighten the grip on her short sword.

"As you wish, Prince." The word cut through the air like a knife. Fili nodded turning to pick a weapon from the wall, she didn't watch him. She didn't need to, she already knew what he would pick. Fili favored the Falchion, liking the wide body of the sword. Magdalen glanced at Fili as he stepped into the ring with her, flashing a smile at his mother and Tearsa. Dis didn't seem pleased with her son's antics, folding her hands tightly in front of her skirt. Her lips pressed into a thin line, as she gave Dwalin a clear look of displeasure. Dwalin seemed to share her feelings but only shrugged his shoulders.

"Be careful, my love." Tearsa smiled calling out to Fili.

Magdalen's eyes jumped to Fili's. His face seemed to pale as he didn't move his eyes from her face. Magdalen's lips pulled down into a deep frown. Her knuckles turned a startling white color. Fili looked as if he wanted to reach out, to say something to Magdalen. But she didn't want to hear any of it.

"Let's do this." She grumbled taking her position.

Fili nodded slowly standing opposite of her. They began circling each other, analyzing the others move waiting, calculating, the first attack. The world around them faded and it was only the pair of them. "Magdalen just let me explain," Fili said so only she could hear him.

Magdalen puckered her lips, letting her arm lung forward attacking his right side. Fili yelled dodging her movement by only inches. The force of the attack made Magdalen step forward, Fili taking the opportunity twisted his arm around Magdalene's shoulder, hooking his leg around here's taking her to the ground. Warm pain shot through her left rib. His chest hit hers painfully, knocking the breath out of her. His eyes widened looking down at her pinned under him. She felt his warm breath brushing her face, she felt his heart beating against his chest. She felt him.

Fili stared down at Magdalens flushed face. A pink flush painted her tanned skin, sweat made her skin shine. Her hair was tasseled and had come loose from her ponytail. Strikes of hair cling to her forehead. She was warm under him. His face only inches from her, sapphire eyes staring down at her. His hand resting beside her head supporting the weight of his body.

"Please, Mi Dushin-Mizim." Fili pleaded it was so soft-spoken. It felt as if he had whispered them into her soul. For a moment she thought she just might let him explain.

That moment passed.

Magdalen stared up wide-eyed before narrowing her eyebrows.

"No." She growled, grabbing his hand knocking his off-balance. Flipping him over, so that she had him pinned. She grabbed his hidden dagger from his thigh holster. She pressed the point of the knife into his throat. Fili didn't look afraid as he looked up at her. Magdalen bit down on her lip so hard it left a metallic taste in her mouth.

"You don't get to call me that anymore," Magdalen said brutally.

Fili reached up as if to touch her check, Magdalen felt like a deer in headlights. She only blinked feeling the warmth of his hand touch her neck, unknowingly lowering the dagger. Fili's hand curled around her neck jerking her head into his. Magdalen screamed folding her forehead as she slipped off Fili. Fili stood up holding his sword into her shoulder.

"Magdalen I had to do what I had to do." He began. "Believe me, I wished we could have had more time."

Magdalen looked up at him. "You knew we would end?" Her voice was small. She felt like she was the size of a needle.

He looked away, not answering her question. She didn't need it answered. Magdalen pushed away from the sword, feeling the sting of metal slicing her palm. Fili quickly took the sword away from her bloodied hand. He reached forward to help her, stopped by her dark gaze. Magdalen placed her hand on her knee painfully pushing herself up, cradling her left rib. A river of blood connected from the corner of her lips to her chin.

"I'm done." She grimaced feeling the waves of pain coursing through her body. Fili reached to grab her, but Magdalen stumbled back. Her hands began to tremble.

"Fili, I'm done." She snapped at him.

His hands lowered, his eyes filled with sadness. "Magdalen, I'm sorry for what I did." She ignored his diatribe walking pasted him.

"We were a mistake." His words hit her ears as she came shoulder to shoulder with him. Fili said nothing else walking away from her, returning to Tearsa's side. Tearsa smiled up at him throwing her arms around him in congratulations. Magdalen didn't move. With a few simple words, her whole world shattered. Was she a mistake? When she had kissed in Dale, it hadn't felt like a mistake. When they held each other under the stars, it hadn't felt like a mistake. When he first offered her friendship, it hadn't felt like a mistake.

Magdalen was on a warpath. She stormed to over to the weaponry rack where Fili was putting away the practice weapon after he had detached himself from his fiance. Dis seemed to notice Magdalen's laser focus, reaching out to comfort the clearly upset young women. But Magdalen ignored her coming to stand beside Fili. He jumped back surprised by her sudden appearance.

"Is that what I was too you?" She snarled.

His words echoing pain in her chest.

Before he could answer she began to stalk off. He called for her, her grip around her dagger tightened. Spinning on her heels she threw her knife, watching as the blade missed Fili burying itself in the wooden rack behind him. He yelped jumping out of harm's way, though she knew what she was aiming at.

Magdalen marched toward him, no one observing the fight dared intervene the angry woman.

They were only inches apart, she felt tall towering over him. "Is that what our kiss was, a mistake." She hissed.

Not waiting for his answer she retrieved her knife. No one spoke watching the tiny human stalk away from the training arena. Dis gaped at Magdalen, she had never seen her so angry before. And her anger had been caused by her son. Dis marched over to Fili who only stared at the stairs Magdalen had disappeared from. Gently she placed her hand on his shoulder making him look at her.

"What have you done, inùdoy?"

Poppy and Bofur had taken notice of the mood shift in their dear Magdalen. And as any worried parents would, Poppy and Bofur had come up with a plan of attack. While they weren't Magdalen's real parents, they had taken it upon themselves to take that role on in her life. Despite her begin a full adult, that didn't stop them. Magdalen's mood had always improved around the children, so one night during dinner they asked her to watch Daisy for the day. Of course, she accepted without hesitation. Poppy couldn't handle the blank look in her eye's any longer, they were willing to try anything to get back their Magdalen again.

Poppy had dropped off Daisy early in the morning before heading to her meetings for the day. Pressing a kiss into Daisy and Magdalen's she was off. Magdalen and Daisy had breakfast in her apartment together, and going over the day's todo list. Much like Magdalen Daisy enjoyed books, and was overjoyed when Magdalen told her that they would be working in the royal library. She practically dragged Magdalen through the halls as soon she was done stuffing her face.

"Daisy, you're going to rip my arm off," Magdalen said dramatically as they reached the doors of the library.

Daisy giggled rolling her eyes at Magdalen's dramatics. Magdalen winked at her pushing out the doors, leading the small dwobbit to her and Ori's office. Daisy eagerly greeted Ori running up to him to explain what she was doing with Magdalen. Magdalen laughed, Daisy had certainly grown out of her shell. Daisy became enamored with the book's Ori had been studying, and Ori had become enamored with explaining the book to Daisy that Magdalen had left the two alone as she went about her business.

Deep in the depths of the library, Magdalen hummed to herself going through the stone shelves retrieving various books. She heard Daisy in the distance call her name, "Here!" Magdalen yelled over her shoulder not looking up from her list of books. Heavy footsteps approached from behind her.

"You know I've heard of the strange girl with no memories, who seemingly won over all of Erebor in a matter of months." A women's deep voice whispered in her ear, Magdalen jumped turning to find not Daisy but Tearsa.

She looked regal as ever, dawning Durin blue robs and golden accessories. Tearsa stared at her for a long moment, circling around her like Magdalene was her prey. Magdalen opened her mouth to ask her what she was doing when she felt fingers brush over the ends of her hair. There was a slight tug on her Clan braid. Magdalen protectively shielded the braid.

"Tell me how does someone so unimportant sneak their way into the good graces of King Thorin. I'm born from Noble blood, yet he keeps me at an arm's distance. Offered the old bat a few favors for a warm bed and food?" She laughed when Magdalen pushed her arm away. Magdalen stared at Tearsa in disgust at the suggestion.

"Come now, it was only a joke. I was hoping you and I would be good friends, after all, you seem very close to my fiancé." Tearsa let the words hang in the air, watching Magdalen's face for any reaction.

Magdalen swallowed her pride, bowing her head. "I wouldn't call us friends. The prince is just kind to all of his people." A cool hand clasped on Magdalen's forearm.

"Then why don't we keep it that way." Tearsa's voice was low. The hand around her forearm tighten, Magdale stared wide at Tearsa. A dark fire danced in the dwarrowdam's eye that told Magdalen she was dangerously serious. "I don't know what you mean." Magdalen's voice was stern, never cowering away from Tearsa's sharp gaze.

Tearsa snorted rolling her eyes. "He is my fiance, my future King. I will not have my future and the future of my people in jeopardy for some human whore, who has eyes on the prince. I am the future Queen, I will make your life a living hell." The grip on her forearm was painful, but Magdalen's face never changed.

"Stay away from the prince." Tearsa spat in her face.

Magdalen gaped at the lady, before narrowing her eyes.

"Don't worry I will." She snapped the book closed in her hands.

Tearsa hummed satisfied with Magdalen's answered. Magdalen raced past Tearsa wanting this conversation to end as soon as possible.

Magdalen stopped at the end of the aisle looking back at Tearsa. "You deserve each other." She said through the tears that were bubbling in her eyes.

She didn't wait for a response as she raced down the aisle, dropping to her knees when she felt she had gotten a good distance away. Her chest tightened and her breathing short. The walls of books were slowly creeping to her, she pressed her eyes closed waiting for the shelves to shame together.

"Maggie?"A small voice called to her.

Magdalen's face snapped up to find a concerned-looking Daisy staring at her. Magdalen wiped away her tears, covering her sadness with a gentle laugh.

Daisy cautiously approached her. "Maggie is everything okay?" Daisy stood in front of Magdalen, unsure of how to comfort the sad adult.

"I'm fine." Magdalene smiled up at Daisy.

Daisy sat next to Magdalen wrapping her arms around Magdalen's neck. Magdalen did her best to keep her emotions under control. Wrapping her arms around Daisy's small frame, Magdalen squeezed Daisy gently.

"Never grow up, kid," Magdalen whispered, pressing a soft kiss into Daisy's dark hair. "It sucks."