Author's Note: So sorry that it took me so long to update. I've just been really lazy this week. For whatever reason I haven't been able to fall asleep at night so I've been sleeping during the day which takes away time I could be writing. I've just been on a weird sleeping schedule. I wanted to let you guys know that I'm officially going to be bumping up the rating to M. There's a sort of graphic rape scene in the beginning of this chapter so I think an M rating is fair. Also considering future chapters. I probably should've bumped it up to an M rating a long time ago given the language and violence in this story.
So I'm really excited to say but I'm going to finally see HAIM in concert this April. They're finally coming over here and I don't think the tickets are that expensive. I kind of want to get the meet and greet VIP package but tickets don't go on sale until tomorrow so I'll just have to wait and see how expensive those are. I can't wait to see them! One of my favorite bands of all time if you couldn't tell before since I named Part III after one of their songs.
bonnieandjangolove: Glad you love the story but I'm going to keep putting in the chapters about Emma's parents because the chapters do have a connection to Emma's present. The thing with Santiago and the mysterious weapon supplier do link into what's going to happen in Part III. So I get that it might be boring when you just want to focus on Emma and Peter but I'm still going to write it because it's important for the story.
sleepingAsAsheep: Steve and Steven Jr. aren't completely alike but as the story goes on you'll see that there are a couple similarities. I think Steven also doesn't want a family because he's afraid that any offspring he had would be targeted which he's kind of right to feel that way. I also wanted to make the beginning of Margot and Steven's relationship funny. She's convinced that she can be professional and stay away from Steven but that's obviously not going to happen. Steven doesn't really believe her and he's kind of amused by her. If you look at it one way it's kind of like how Emma's sometimes amused by Peter's antics. I still haven't made a complete decision over what will happen with Rumlow but we'll get there when we get there.
cabrera1234: It's funny you should ask that because I was just reading up on Peter's parents and they might make an appearance in one of chapters about Emma's parents...but I actually read that they were in the CIA. I'll double check just in case.
AppropriateLlama: I actually haven't read any fanfictions in a while. I've just been really hung up on writing this story that nothing else really appeals to me. I've read a few Spider-Man fanfictions but haven't found too many that I like. The ones I do like are actually really short and the author kind of stopped writing it. I wish there was more but at the same time I'm kind of afraid to read them in case they influence my story in any way.
Radioactive88: There will be more chapters of Margot and Steven to come. I'm not sure when the next one will come but not for a few chapters.
Mcduffie145: Good question! Emma actually can have children and Hydra wanted it that way which I'll explain more in upcoming chapters. It's something that will probably come up when Rumlow and the rest of Hydra makes a more consistent reappearance.
I know last chapter wasn't really an M rated chapter but maybe it is in another country? I don't know. I'm still bumping it up for violence for now but for future chapters as well...just to be safe.
Roxy: It's taking so long because Emma's just a really closed off person but the time when she finally divulges that secret is sooner than you think. It's gonna happen soon. I just wanted Emma and Peter to already be in a relationship when that happens. So just hang on a little longer.
ImsebastianstanButter: I'm still making the who should kill Rumlow decision. I haven't made it yet but I will when the time comes. Glad that you're all caught up.
artemis7448: I actually loved writing that dream sequence. It was so weird and also just fun to write. The dream sequence reminded of this Casablanca spoof that SNL did a couple years ago which is one of my favorite skits. I think JK Simmons played Rick and Kate McKinnon played Ilsa. Now whenever I see that scene in the movie my mind always goes to that Casablanca spoof. I actually recommend that everyone see that spoof. Well, if you've seen the movie then see the spoof otherwise you probably won't get it.
bonitalito: I'm bumping this story up to an M. I'm not sure if this chapter completely qualifies as a M rating or even the last chapter but I'm bumping it up for future chapters.
Tusia0095: What's funny is I actually started writing an Amazing Spider-Man fanfiction with a character that was basically Emma but she had a different name and I think she was a lot nicer than Emma which wasn't really realistic considering the past she had. I eventually scrapped it but I kind of brought it back when I saw the Homecoming movie come out and I really loved Tom Holland's Spider-Man. The character in the Amazing Spider-Man fanfiction was also Captain America's granddaughter but I actually like this version way better. I think I only wrote like 14,000 words of the original story. I still haven't made any final decisions about the who should kill Rumlow thing but I'm down to Peter, Steve, and Bucky. So many decisions. I don't think Emma's going to do it but maybe I'll somehow incorporate the idea of her just watching him die in silence. Someone else proposed that idea and I really liked it so we'll see. The chapters with Emma's parents aren't just fillers. They kind of tie into what's going to happen later in the story. The thing with Santiago and mysterious weapon supplier is actually somewhat important and I just included the side dialogue between Emma's parents because I actually enjoy writing it. A lot of people like it so I'll keep writing but I'm not writing it for no reason. It is kind of important to the story. I get that it might be boring if you really just want to focus on Emma and Peter. If it wasn't my story I'd probably be a little bored too...it really just depends, I guess. You can't please everyone.
DeityOfDeadlyRose: Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed the story. I don't like slow burns either but with a character like Emma it was just necessary. Trust me...I can't wait to write when they finally get together either which is basically going to happen really soon...like really, really soon. By the end of this chapter I think you can pretty much guess when. I'm not planning on ending this story anytime soon. There might be times where I take a month long break but that's only happened twice so far. I'm just more inspired to write this story than any of my others.
Panda Blitz: Thank you!
Keystone: I don't think the Defenders are going to be central to this story. There might be a chapter or two with one of them but not for a while. There's not a lot of the Defenders that I like except for maybe Jessica Jones. The only other ones that I like are Elektra and the Punisher but they're not Defenders. I think I would be interested in writing a chapter in which Emma and Frank meet or even Emma and Jessica meet. That's really interesting to me but we'll see. I know it's been a huge slow burn even though it doesn't really feel that way to me but I promise that Emma and Peter getting together is super close. You'll see by the end of the chapter that it's really close. I know I'm kind of evil for making everyone wait so long because we're like at about 500,000 words but it was never going to come easy for a character like Emma. It'll be worth it though...I promise. There's still no final decisions about the Rumlow thing but once I get closer to writing that part I'm sure it'll just come to me. I know that I can't please everyone and I just hope that people understand that.
She felt trapped under his weight as she froze in his clutches. He loomed over her and forced her to look him in the eyes. Emma remembered something she read in a biology book that Hydra assigned her once. She remembered reading that a rabbit or prey like animal would freeze in the jaws of a predator. Emma always wondered why the rabbit wouldn't try to escape or fight back but now she understood. She was just too scared to move.
"Margot." He grunted in her ear as he moved. It was almost like the beach…like the waves were moving back and forth but during a storm. Everything felt violent and dark, making Emma feel like she really was in the middle of a storm.
Tears streamed down from Emma's face as she felt his hands all over her…as she felt him inside of her. She just laid there and stared up at the ceiling, praying that it would be over soon. It was all she could hope to do while in his grasp.
She clenched her eyes close for a moment and soon enough the sounds of his heavy panting and the pain vanished. She was confused but was too scared to look. The blonde was terrified that she would open her eyes again and see him staring down at her with those nearly black eyes of his. Still...Emma eventually decided that there would be no harm from opening her eyes. When Emma opened her eyes she no longer saw Rumlow looming over her which gave her some relief but her relief didn't last long. Her vision was replaced with something just as dark and eerie looking. She saw dated carpeting, floral wallpaper, and framed family photographs on the walls. Emma realized exactly where she was.
The farm house.
She stood up from the carpet that she had been laying on and realized that she was in the living room of her old house. Her toy horses lay scattered across the floor as if she had abandoned them there like she used to whenever her mother fixed her lunch. The television was on but there was only white noise. She swallowed as she took in her surroundings, realizing everything seemed a little too still. There was nothing that felt out of place and that made her uneasy. Emma could even hear the familiar sound of wind chimes on the front porch and the faint creaking of the wind mill behind the farm house. Something inside her told her that something was very wrong.
"Mom?" She called out hesitantly as she looked around the house but there was no answer. Emma for some reason felt like her mother was there…like she might've been trying to tell her something. Emma walked towards the kitchen and that's when she finally saw her mother. The beautiful red headed woman looked exactly like she had looked the last time Emma saw her.
Laying across the floor, with her red hair pooled out across the carpet, was Margot Rogers. Emma's mother was far paler than Emma ever remembered her being. There was dark purple circles under her eyes and her lips were blue instead of their usual natural pinkness. Emma felt sick as she looked at the large cut across her mother's throat. The blood was still pouring out of the wound and Emma tried not to cry at the sight. It was like it was all the those years ago when Rumlow carried her away from the scene, not bothering to shield her innocent eyes from the horror he inflicted upon her parents.
Steven Rogers was sprawled out on the stairs just like Emma remembered. Emma couldn't even see his face anymore. There was just a gaping hole where his face used to be. He looked like some kind of creature that came out of a Guillermo Del Toro movie. He wasn't the man who used to read her bedtime stories anymore. He wasn't the man who used to take her to the county fair either. Emma glanced at the wall and saw the way his brains were splattered everywhere. She never forgot the way the blood and brain matter dripped down from the framed photograph of the three of them at the Watermelon Festival in town.
"Emma…" Someone whispered and Emma glanced back over to where her mother was. This time her mother's eyes were wide open as she stared at her. Emma looked at her mother in horror as the redhead seemed to be talking to her.
"Did let us die in vain…kill him." Margot Rogers told her. Her mother's voice sounded horse and it scared Emma. She didn't sound like the sweet and bright sounding woman that used to sing while she cooked in the kitchen. "You have to kill him, Emma. For us."
"I don't know if I can kill him." Emma told her mother, tears flooding her eyes. "I want to but I'm not that person anymore. I don't want to disappoint Peter."
"We're your parents. Is Peter more important than us?" Her mother asked her, more blood gushing out her wound. "You have to avenge us."
"I don't know." Emma said as she wiped the tears from her face.
"Look at what he did to us, Emma." Her mother rasped before she weakly pointed in the opposite direction. "Look at what he did to your father."
Emma turned around to look at what her mother was pointing at when she nearly screamed at the sight before her. Emma's father stood in front of her as he clasped his hands around her forearms. Her eyes became fixated at the large hole in the middle of what used to be his face. Blood oozed down from the top of the hole and slowly dripped down. Some of the blood even landed on her arms. Emma watched as a snake began to slither out of the gaping hole in his face. She could only watch in fright as it sounded like he mumbled something but she couldn't understand what he said due to his lack of a mouth. How could this be her father? How could he have turned into this?
"Look what he did!"
Emma woke up screaming from her nightmare and flinched when she felt arms on her. She struggled in the person's arms for what felt like an eternity as she thought of the gaping hole in her father's face. It was all she could see through the darkness of her room. She cried as someone wrapped her so tight in their arms that Emma didn't know what to do with herself.
"Emma, shhhh…It's me." He whispered softly and Emma immediately knew it was Peter. "It's okay…it was just a nightmare." Emma started to feel herself come out of the terrifying nightmare as she focused on Peter's face. His kind brown eyes were looking at her in concern and Emma's breathing immediately started to calm down. He pulled her closer to him and Emma rested her cheek against his as he rubbed her back soothingly. She was surprised she was letting him be this close but she desperately needed him more than she ever had before.
"Emma, you're fine. Nothing can hurt you." Peter continued to whisper to her and Emma might've even believed that.
"W-what are you doing here?" Emma asked him nervously as she started realizing that she was back in her bedroom in the compound. Peter pulled away to look at her. He hated how frightened she looked in that moment. This reminded him of the look on her face when Volkov mentioned Rumlow. She had that same terrified look on her face and it even scared Peter to see her like that.
"I went to get a drink of water and on my way back I heard you screaming." Peter told her honestly and Emma nodded before biting her lip nervously.
"Do you think the others heard?" She asked and Peter shook his head.
"You weren't that loud. I only heard you because of my enhanced hearing." Peter explained. Emma felt a bit relieved to know that no one else had heard her. Usually her nightmares weren't that bad but occasionally she had a really bad one.
"Do you want some water?" Peter asked her as he brought out the glass of water he had placed on her nightstand. Emma nodded silently and didn't say another word. She took the glass from his hands and took a long sip of water. Emma even felt a little bit better afterwards. Once she finished taking a sip of water she just stared at the glass of water in her hands, watching as the water splashed back and forth against the glass as her hands shook. Emma gritted her teeth as it only reminded her of the nightmare about Rumlow and her parents. Back and forth. Again and again.
"Are you okay now, Emma?" Peter asked her hesitantly. He knew better than to assume she was alright. The haunted look on her face spoke volumes.
"Yeah." Emma said one moment but shook her head the next moment as she furrowed her eyebrows. "No, actually. I'm not."
"What was the nightmare about?" Peter asked her curiously. "I mean, you don't have to tell me or anything…only if you're comfortable." Emma glanced down at the glass of water before looking back up at Peter.
"It's fine." Emma assured him. "It was just about my parents." Well, that wasn't a complete lie. The nightmare had mostly been about her parents and Peter didn't need to know about Rumlow anyways. That was her business and no one else's.
"Oh…" Peter trailed off as he tried to think of something appropriate to say. He never had nightmares of his parents but of course he didn't remember his parents enough to have nightmares about them. "It wasn't real, Emma. None of it was real."
"I know. It just felt very real." Emma said in response as she tried not to think about the images of her dead parents.
"Do you have nightmares often?" Peter asked her, feeling worried for her. He recalled the time she had a nightmare in the vault in D.C. Peter had never seen anyone wake up from a nightmare like that. He didn't think anyone could have a nightmare that was that bad. Emma sighed.
"Yes." She answered shortly without looking at him. "When Steve was here he'd help me with the nightmares. We'd talk about irrelevant things but also about what we thought our nightmares meant. It sounds stupid but somehow it really helped me get over them." Peter looked at the lost and sad expression on her face and wished that he could do something about it. He wished that he could somehow bring Captain America back just so he could make Emma happy again.
"I know it's not the same but maybe you could talk to me about the nightmare?" Peter suggested nervously. He didn't know how she would respond to something like that. Emma glanced back at Peter, her eyes resting on his face as she thought about his suggestion. It wasn't that she didn't trust Peter but it was just that she was afraid to let him know the horrors inside her mind. Even without Rumlow her mind was a pretty terrifying place. However, Emma quickly decided that she didn't need to tell him every single little detail…just a brief summary. Maybe it would even help her to tell him.
"They were already dead in the nightmare." Emma said suddenly much to Peter's surprise. Peter quickly put his surprise aside and listened to her intently. "But at the same time it was like they weren't dead."
"I don't understand." Peter said in confusion.
"They were dead but they were speaking to me." Emma further explained as she continued. "It was pretty messed up actually. They looked just as I last remembered…my mother's throat slit and my father's face blown off with his brains splattered everywhere. That's why it was so creepy when he tried talking to me."
Peter tried to imagine the image of Emma's parents but then realized he'd probably get nightmares just from trying to imagine them. He still couldn't comprehend the gruesome things that Emma saw when she was so young. Peter wished that she hadn't seen her parents like that. No one deserved that and especially not Emma.
"What did they say?" Peter asked her quietly. He didn't want to talk too much about seeing the gruesome blood bath scene of her dead parents…it was better that she forget about that. Emma shrugged as she tried to appear uncaring about the nightmare.
"They said they wanted me to avenge them." Emma told him and Peter tried to read the expression on her face but like always it was an impossible task to try and read the mind of Emma Rogers. What went on inside her mind was anyone's guess.
"Do you think they'd really want that?" Peter questioned and Emma shook her head.
"I don't know, Peter. I didn't really know them that well." Emma told him but he could tell this was something that was really troubling her.
"I don't think your parents would want that for you, Emma. The nightmare version of them wasn't really them." Peter said reassuringly as he locked eyes with her. Emma felt a hundred times better as he looked at her with those kind brown eyes. He made her feel like everything might be alright.
"Do you have nightmares too?" Emma asked him as she decided that she wanted to change the subject. Peter shrugged.
"Sometimes." Peter admitted before continuing. "I used to have them about Uncle Ben but now I've been having them over what happened with Fisher and Volkov." A look of concern came over Emma's face as she stared at him.
"You've been having nightmares about Fisher and Volkov?" Emma asked him in surprise. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"I didn't want to bother you with it. You're always so tough that I didn't think you'd care." Peter told her quietly and Emma didn't know how to feel about that. Was she really so cold that Peter would think she didn't care?
"Of course I care, Peter." Emma said as Peter stared at her in surprise and she suddenly felt very self conscious. "I mean, we're friends so it's fine if you want to talk about those sort of things."
"Fine. As long as you talk about your nightmares with me." Peter told her and Emma nodded in agreement.
"Sure." She said in agreement before something occurred to her. "Is that why you went to go get a glass of water? Is it because you had a nightmare about Fisher and Volkov?" Peter sighed before he reluctantly nodded.
"Yes. I can't sleep sometimes." Peter admitted. "I just…Well, I picture Volkov and what he did to Fisher and himself. It was all so terrible." Emma took his hand in hers and gave his hand a small comforting squeeze.
"I can't promise that you'll ever be able to completely forget but with time those memories will fade. Other things will take priority." Emma said truthfully and Peter just looked at her. It was times like these that Peter really thought she might feel something for him other than friendship. He just didn't want to risk anything by confronting her about that.
"I…uh…I should probably go back to my room." Peter said as his feelings for Emma started to feel a bit overwhelming all of a sudden. He started to leave but Emma grabbed his wrist, stopping him from leaving. He gave her a confused look as Emma started to feel somewhat embarrassed. She wasn't even sure why she stopped him but it was like a reflex or impulse. Emma just didn't want Peter to leave...she needed him.
"You don't have to leave." Emma told him hesitantly. "You could stay if you wanted." Peter's eyes widened because he couldn't believe what Emma was saying. Maybe he'd heard her wrong.
"What?" Peter asked in bewilderment and Emma blushed.
"I mean, since you're having nightmares and trouble sleeping you could sleep here if you want." Emma elaborated. "I don't mind." Somehow Peter knew what Emma was really trying to say. She wanted him to stay because she didn't want to be alone. Peter found that he really didn't want to leave her alone either. The look in her usually bright ocean blue eyes was slightly dimmed by the sadness on her face. She still looked haunted from her nightmare and Peter wanted to make her feel better.
"I'll stay if you're okay with it." Peter said as he swallowed nervously. Emma gave him a small smile before she scooted over in her bed, patting the space next to her. She lifted the covers, inviting him into the warm bed. Peter suddenly felt shy as he blushed.
"Are you sure you don't want me to sleep on the floor or something?" Peter asked her nervously and Emma rolled her eyes at him.
"Peter, I trust that you'll keep your hands to yourself. I'm not worried." Emma told him. "It's completely fine. Just keep to your side." It was true…Emma really did trust Peter. She trusted him entirely so she knew he'd never hurt her. It didn't matter if he was a guy and she was a girl. Emma used to believe that she'd never trust a man enough to let him in her bed but everything was different with Peter. He was different.
Peter chewed on his bottom lip nervously before he decided that if it was okay with Emma than it was probably okay to sleep in the same bed as her. He had slept in the same bed with her before that time she stayed over at his and May's apartment but that was different. Ned was in the room and Peter hadn't quite developed the feelings he had for Emma then. He slowly slid into Emma's bed while Emma watched him silently. His face reddened even more under her intense gaze.
"Is this okay?" Peter asked her softly and Emma nodded.
"Yes…if you feel comfortable?" Emma replied and Peter laughed nervously.
"I am. Your…um…bed is really nice." Peter said awkwardly as he tried to think of something to say. He winced because he realized how stupid that sounded. Emma just smiled at him in amusement.
"You know, it's probably the same exact bed that you have in your room." She told him and Peter nodded.
"Probably." Emma didn't know how long they laid there in silence within the darkness of her bedroom. They were quite a ways away from each other in bed but it still felt like the most intimate either one of them had been with each other. A couple minutes had passed before Emma decided to finally call it a night.
"Goodnight, Peter." Emma whispered to him and Peter smiled.
"Goodnight, Emma." Peter replied and Emma's eyes fluttered shut eventually as she began to sleep again. Peter didn't fall asleep for a good half an hour after that as he watched her sleep. He knew it was probably creepy but he couldn't help it. Emma looked so peaceful when she slept…a lot different than how she seemed when she was awake. He thought she looked a lot like an angel even. It was times like this that Peter wished that Emma could be his. At least he could pretend even if he couldn't be with her in real life.
In the later hours of the morning Tony Stark found himself looking for the two youngest inhabitants of the compound. Usually Emma and Peter got up fairly early for training but Maria said that they hadn't showed up. He became somewhat worried for them when they didn't show up for breakfast either although Tony would never admit to being worried. Tony thought that Peter might've been too hung up on the new gaming system that he'd gotten him for his birthday. May told him not to get the kid the gaming system because it would be a distraction but like always Tony didn't listen. Without even knocking, Tony swung open Peter's bedroom door expecting to find the teenager in his room but he was surprised to just see Peter's empty, unmade bed instead. The billionaire furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.
"McConaughey, where the hell are the kids?" Tony asked the AI system in desperation. "I didn't lose Peter, did I? God, May is going to kill me."
"Not to worry, Mr. Stark." The AI system replied. "Mr. Parker is located in Miss Rogers' room." Tony's eyes widened in surprise as he took in that bit of information.
"He's in Mini Cap's room?!" Tony exclaimed before he groaned. "Please tell me they aren't having sex or anything? Cap's gonna murder me and put my head on a stick."
Tony took a deep breath before he finally opened Emma's bedroom door, not knowing what he was going to find. However, he was relieved to find that nothing of the sort was going on. Tony didn't really know why he thought that Mini Cap and Peter would be engaged in those kinds of activities. He didn't think the kid had it in him to seduce Mini Cap. In all honesty it would probably be the other way around.
Tony was actually quite delighted by what he saw in Emma's bedroom. The two teenagers were fast asleep in Emma's bed but not only were they asleep but they were also cuddled up together. Emma's head rested against Peter's chest as Peter had his arms wrapped tightly around the blonde. They seemed to be at peace as they rested there in each other's arms. Tony even thought they looked cute and he never thought anything was cute.
"What are you doing?" Pepper asked her fiancee as she walked up behind him. Tony gestured for her to be quiet before he pointed inside the room.
"Look at them, Pepper." Tony whispered and Pepper peeked inside the bedroom curiously. Her eyes widened in surprise as she spotted the two cuddling teenagers. Emma Rogers cuddling? Pepper didn't think that was possible. Still…Pepper wondered if it was alright to leave the two of them like that. Was it appropriate?
"Is this okay? Should we let them sleep together like that?" Pepper asked hesitantly.
"What do you mean?" Tony asked in confusion and Pepper looked between him and the two teenagers as if it were obvious.
"Tony, they're teenagers. I know my dad would've flipped out if he ever caught me sharing a bed with a boy at that age." Pepper elaborated and Tony shrugged.
"Well, they're not normal teenagers, are they?" Tony responded before he rolled his eyes. "They're fine, Pepper. Besides…we shouldn't wake them up. I'm pretty sure Mini Cap would murder me and throw my body in the Hudson if she ever knew I saw her like this."
Pepper sighed as she decided to accept Tony's answer. It's not like she wanted to wake up Emma and Peter and feel the blonde's wrath either. Tony was right about Emma. Something told her that the blonde wouldn't be okay with them seeing her in such a vulnerable state.
"Fine. We should leave them be then." Pepper finally said as she looked away from the two sleeping teenagers. "I read somewhere that teenagers need all the sleep they can get." Tony smirked as he softly closed the door, making sure not to wake them.
"Something tells me that there's more than just sleep on their minds." He told Pepper suggestively as they started to walked back down the hallway. Pepper glared at him.
"Well, something tells me that Steve's going to kill you the second he finds out about this." Pepper retorted and Tony waved his hand dismissively.
"Capsicle needs to learn how to loosen up. I know sleeping in the same bed was considered sinning back then but it's not the 40s anymore." Tony said, not sounding worried at all. "Besides… he's one to talk. How did Steven Jr. and Mini Cap get here again? Oh, that's right…because Cap had premarital sex with lovely Aunt Peggy and knocked her up."
"Okay, I'm sure reminding Steve of that will definitely make the situation better." Pepper said sarcastically and Tony shrugged.
"Maybe Mini Cap will protect me." Tony said and Pepper gave him a doubtful look. Out of everything that could happen, Emma defending Tony was still the least likely. It didn't matter if she and Tony had made amends. Pepper was almost positive that Emma would even make the situation worse for Tony before sitting back and watching him get into even deeper trouble. Watching Tony in peril was one of Emma's favorite past times. Pepper had to admit Steve and the others coming back to see Emma in this new time in her life would definitely be interesting. She just hoped that none of them would kill Tony once they saw what was going on between Emma and Peter.
"How can you spend hours playing that stupid game?" Emma drawled boredly as she laid across Peter's bed, watching him play a video game on his new gaming system. She had spent the past couple hours in Peter's bedroom reading one of her books while Peter played his stupid video game. As boring as she found it, she couldn't help but find it adorable when Peter was so concentrated that his tongue poked out his mouth and a crease formed between his eyebrows.
The two had silently agreed not to bring up the night before as they went about their day. Emma was kind of glad to not have an awkward conversation like that especially with the way she felt about Peter. When she woke up in Peter's arms that morning Emma actually felt safe and content in his arms. She was surprised, of course, to find that they were so close together but Emma didn't really mind it. At one point she had even closed her eyes and fell back asleep. It was so easy to fall asleep in Peter's arms and Emma hadn't even wanted to part from him that morning…but she knew she had to.
"It's fun. You should try it." Peter told her and Emma rolled her eyes. A part of Emma wanted to go over there and beat the gaming system with a baseball bat but she knew Peter would be hurt if she did that. As much as it annoyed her that he was paying more attention to his video games than he was to her, Emma understood that his video games were important to him.
"I don't play games, Parker. Games are for children." Emma told him before a mischievous smirk came over her face. "Of course we could always play a different kind of game." Peter paused his game as he turned back to look at her curiously.
"What kind of game?" Peter asked her innocently and he could see the amusement in the blonde's eyes.
"An adult game." Emma said suggestively. "A kind of game that Pepper and Tony play." Peter blushed once he realized what she meant.
"S-stop talking l-like that. It's not a-appropriate." Peter stammered as he averted his eyes. Emma only rolled her eyes at him.
"Don't be silly, Parker. I was only kidding." Emma told him but Peter couldn't help but frown. After his dream the other night the longing for Emma to be something more than just a friend only seemed to be intensified. When she flirted it bothered him because he knew that she wasn't being serious. Sometimes Peter wished that she was being serious. He wished that she was actually interested in him being more than a friend to her.
"Come on, haven't you ever played video games before…or even toys? Something remotely childish?" Peter said as he pointedly changed the subject. He didn't want to think about the longing he felt for Emma to return his feelings. Emma shrugged.
"Hydra's idea of toys were sniper rifles and combat knives. Not the kind of stuff that was sold at any ordinary toy store." She said sarcastically and Peter frowned. He didn't like how she casually joked about her traumatic past sometimes...as if it was something to be taken lightly.
"What about before Hydra? When you lived with your parents?" Peter asked her and Emma tensed. It was rare that she talked about her parents. Peter sort of understood why she never talked about her them. She actually happened to remember her parents unlike Peter who didn't remember his parents at all. He was only two when his own parents died so it wasn't likely that he would remember them. She talked about her parents dying like she had last night and a couple weeks ago but she hadn't really shared much personal information about them...like about what they were like. Peter couldn't help but be curious about her parents.
"I used to have these toy horses that I played with." Emma said quietly. "I always wanted a horse ever since I could remember. All the older girls in Oklahoma were barrel racers so naturally I wanted to be like them."
"What's a barrel racer?" Peter asked curiously and Emma smiled as she recollected her dad taking her to the county fair. She remembered watching in wonder as one teenage girl in particular raced around the barrel on her beloved horse in only a couple of seconds. Her dad laughed at the bewildered look on her face and promised to get her a horse someday when she was old enough. Emma wasn't sure why she thought of that memory. She hadn't thought about that memory in years.
"A barrel racer is someone who competes in this sort of rodeo event in which people ride their horses around obstacles like barrels in a certain time frame." Emma explained and Peter was bewildered that Emma had ever been interested in something so…normal. Emma sighed before she continued talking about the toys she remembered playing. "I used to have this plush horse. Um…it was the from that movie…Spirit." Peter raised his eyebrows in surprise.
"You watched that movie?" Emma nodded.
"Yes, I watched it like a hundred times. It was my favorite movie." Emma admitted and Peter couldn't help but notice that there wasn't a day that went by that Emma didn't say or do something that surprised him.
"I'm sorry that you had your childhood taken from you. I wished that you could've been a barrel racer like you wanted to." Peter told her honestly and Emma stared back at him, blue eyes meeting brown. It was times like these that Emma felt the overwhelming urge to kiss Peter. She wanted to more than anything but that would only confuse the both of them.
"Things change. If Hydra hadn't taken me I'd probably want to do something else." Emma said but in all honesty sometimes she did wonder what her life would've been like if her parents had lived…if Hydra had never gotten a hold of her. She knew, however, that she shouldn't think like that. Having those kinds of thoughts would only depress her.
"Here." Peter said as he grabbed a spare controller and handed it to Emma. He could tell the memory of her life before Hydra made her sad and he desperately wanted to make her feel better. "Give it a shot." Emma took the controller hesitantly from his hand as she gave him an unsure look. She didn't know what she was supposed to do with it. Guns and knives she knew more than well but a video game controller? Emma wasn't so sure.
"I don't know what to do with it." Emma said as she stared at the controller with a mystified look on her face. Peter smiled at her before he placed his hands over hers. Emma's breathing hitched at his sudden closeness as she fought to keep the blush off her face.
"It's easy." Peter said softly as he started to explain what each button did. Emma listened to him but she wasn't paying so much attention to his words but rather the look on his face as he explained everything to her. He looked so happy and excited. Emma wished that he could be like that forever. She hoped that he would never change.
"Good God, Mini Cap, how much can you eat?" Tony asked as he watched Emma pile away a ton of food. If he didn't know about Emma's abilities than he probably wouldn't believe a girl like Emma could stuff her face with that much food. The Avengers and their associates were currently eating dinner in the recreational area of the compound. Emma didn't seem as offended as she should've been by Tony's comment as she smirked at him.
"You're just jealous that you can't eat this much without getting fat." Emma remarked and Tony glared at her. Everyone else at the table watched in amusement as Emma and Tony started to embark on their usual banter. No one else would talk to Tony like how Emma talked to him which only entertained everyone at the compound.
"I don't get fat." Tony retorted and Emma raised an eyebrow as she gave him a teasing smile.
"I don't know, Tony, you look you've been putting on some pounds in your old age." Emma told him before glancing down at his stomach area as if to emphasize her point. Tony shook his head before looking at her in disbelief.
"My old age?" He asked her. "How old do you think I am?" Emma feigned a thoughtful look before answering.
"You're about to celebrate your sixtieth birthday soon, aren't you? You'll be able to get the senior citizen special at that diner by the townhouse." Emma quipped and Tony glared at her again. Rhodey disguised his laugh as a cough while Peter tried not to laugh at Mr. Stark. He really admired Tony but Emma seemed to know just how to push Tony's buttons sometimes.
"Sixty?! You think I'm sixty?!" Tony exclaimed in disbelief. "And seriously?! Senior citizen special? You're making fun of my age when Steve and daddy dearest are like a hundred years old?"
"Yeah but they don't look old like you do." Emma retorted and Tony clenched his jaw. It always seemed like that girl had an answer for everything. She was just like father in that way…her real one.
"Listen here, you little-" Tony started to say but Pepper intervened before their bickering went on anymore. Emma was only finishing what Tony had started after all.
"Calm down, children. Okay? We're all friends here." Pepper said diplomatically as she smiled at the two. The strawberry blonde then turned to look at both Emma and Peter. "So how's school going for you guys?" Peter laughed nervously.
"School's good…we're actually starting to get ready for that decathlon trip next year. Mr. Harrington's still setting everything up." Peter said cheerfully and Emma knew how much he was looking forward to the trip. He had been talking about it all the time now. Peter would actually tell anyone who would listen about the trip. It was all he rambled on about when they were on missions and if Emma didn't secretly enjoy his rambling than she'd probably duck tape his mouth shut.
"London, right?" Darcy inquired and Peter nodded enthusiastically as Emma cut up her food as if the trip meant nothing to her. Emma honestly didn't care much about the trip since London was filled with some bad memories for her. London was where her grandmother's funeral took place and it was the place she had been right when everything seemed to go wrong with the Avengers...one of the last places she had been with Steve before he disappeared after the airport fight in Germany.
"Yeah, it's going to be so cool." Peter said excitedly. "We'll be there for a week and we'll see all kinds of things like the London Eye, Buckingham Palace, and maybe even that wax museum that has all those celebrities in it." It should've annoyed her about how much Peter blabbed but she was surprisingly calm about his talkativeness. That's just how her and Peter were now a days.
"They have my wax figure in there, you know." Tony said as he butted into the conversation. Emma rolled her eyes at him.
"Why would we care about some stupid wax figure of you? You're annoying enough in person. The only reason that I'm going on this trip is to get away from you." Emma told him and Tony smirked at her.
"You love me, Mini Cap. Everyone knows it." Tony said smugly as he grinned at her. Emma glowered at him but didn't say anything. She knew Pepper wasn't going to take kindly to anymore bickering from her and Tony.
"Aren't you excited to go to London, Emma?" Jane asked her curiously and Emma didn't look very excited at the prospect of going to London.
"Did you know they used to throw their waste into the River Thames? That's centuries worth of human waste piled up in one river." Emma deadpanned and everyone knew it was typical of Emma to be so cynical. "I've been there before. It's nothing impressive…I've seen nicer cities."
"Your grandmother was from England though, Em. It could be exciting to go there." Darcy told her as she tried to get the blonde to see the bright side of things.
"And she never went back. Gee, I wonder why?" Emma said sarcastically and Darcy gave up. Emma was so blatantly pessimistic sometimes. Peter, however, didn't look dismayed as he looked over at her.
"It won't be so bad, Emma. Besides…they've got a ton of art museums there that you'd like." Peter said as he tried to cheer her up. "I heard the National Gallery has Da Vinci, Monet, and even Van Gogh. Not to mention there's also the Tate Modern."
Emma realized that Peter was right. Maybe the trip wouldn't be so bad given the fact that there was a lot of art and history in the city. She had always wanted to go to the Tate Modern anyways. It was on her list of top art museums she wanted to visit someday. Steve and Sam were supposed to take her to the Tate Modern after her grandmother's funeral as a distraction but everything with her father and the accords started happening so they never got the chance.
"I guess you're right. The Tate Modern has these sound sculptures that I've been interested to see in person." Emma admitted reluctantly and the others seated at the table were surprised. It was seldom that the blonde was ever agreeable...but maybe that was just the charm of Peter Parker. Maybe Peter could get Emma to do things she'd never consider otherwise.
Peter just smiled at her as he went back to eating his dinner. Little did the teenagers know that they had the complete and undivided attention of a certain billionaire sitting at the table. Tony watched them curiously and wondered when those two would finally get together. A part of Tony really wished that Cap could come back to see all this. Boy, he'd love to see the look on Steve's face when he learned that Mini Cap and Spiderling we're crazy about each other. Hell, Tony would even like to see the look on daddy dearest's face when he found out.
It was a couple hours later when Emma and Peter were watching a movie in the recreational area of the compound. The others had left them to their own devices. Emma and Peter usually had their movie nights every weekend at the compound but this time it was Emma's pick. Much to Peter's dismay she had picked one of her boring old movies…Casablanca. However, as the movie went on he quickly became enthralled as he recognized a line that the character Rick repeatedly told Ilsa, the other character in the movie.
"Here's to looking at you, kid." Peter said quietly although it sounded more like a question on his lips. Emma tore her gaze away from the screen to look at Peter. She noticed how there was a confused look on his face as he locked eyes with her. "You said that to me before." If Emma appeared to be bothered by his statement she didn't show it.
"So?" She retorted in a bored tone but Peter was sure it meant something.
"Before I went after Liz's dad you said that same line to me. Why?" Peter questioned and Emma just stared at him. Could she tell him the truth? Could she just tell him she said that line to him because she loved him…because she saw Humphrey Bogart say it to his loved one so she decided to do the same? Emma didn't think she could tell Peter because she was scared of losing him. So she lied instead so he wouldn't leave her. Emma shrugged nonchalantly as if none of it meant anything to her.
"I was out of it, Peter. A building fell on top of me so I barely remember much after that." Emma lied and she sincerely hoped that Peter wouldn't be able to see through her lies. Sometimes he had a talent for detecting her lies. However, tonight didn't seem to be one of those nights as he seemingly bought it.
"I don't really like this movie, Emma." Peter said honestly after staring at her for a moment. He decided to change the subject after it became obvious that he wouldn't be able to get anything else out of her. "It's depressing. They go through all this trouble and they don't even end up together?"
"Life doesn't always have a happy ending like Star Wars." Emma retorted.
"Star Wars doesn't always have a happy ending. Was Kylo Ren murdering his own father a happy ending? I don't think so. What about Anakin turning to the dark side and Padme dying of a broken heart? Those don't sound like happy endings to me either." Peter quipped and Emma rolled her eyes. He was such a dork sometimes.
"It was happy for Darth Vader, wasn't it? He got do whatever he wanted without Obi-Wan or a wife nagging him. He sounded like he got what he wanted…although if I were him I would've killed that wrinkled up old man years before. No old man would get to tell me what to do." Emma told Peter smugly, fully aware of how much that sentence would infuriate Peter. She watched in amusement as his face got all red as he huffed. It took him a few seconds before he realized that Emma was only trying to rile him up. He glared at the smug looking blonde and wondered how on Earth he could love her…well, he supposed she wouldn't be the Emma he loved if she didn't try to rile him up.
"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response." Peter told her before bringing the conversation back to the movie that had just ended. "Back to Rick and Ilsa…Why couldn't he have just fought for her harder? How could he just let her go like that if he really loved her?"
"Don't you see, Peter…the whole thing was a lot bigger than the two of them." Emma said as she locked eyes once again with him. "There was a war going on which left them with no time to be selfish. She would've died or been imprisoned had she stayed there with him. That's why Rick let her go…because he loved her that much." Peter analyzed the expression on Emma's face as he tried to determine what was going on in her mind which was a nearly impossible task in itself.
"I thought you didn't believe in love." He said to her and Emma swallowed nervously before answering.
"I said love was a weakness not that I didn't believe it was real. I stand by that belief." Emma told Peter which was the truth. Sometimes she really thought her love for Peter would be the death of her.
"I don't think it's a weakness. I believe it's a strength." Peter told Emma honestly. He really believed that too because he found that his feelings for Emma only made him want to be a better person…more understanding and more motivated even. Despite the fact that he didn't think Emma reciprocated his feelings he was sure that loving her made him stronger.
"It ruins people." Emma said bitterly. "My grandparents got their hearts broken by time and they were never the same again…my grandfather might never recover. My parents fell in love and got themselves killed. If they hadn't fallen in love than they might both be alive and well today." Peter shook his head furiously.
"If your parents hadn't fallen in love than you wouldn't be here, Emma." Peter didn't like some of the things Emma said sometimes. Mostly because he hated the way she talked about herself…as if everyone else was better off without her there. Peter knew he wouldn't be better off without her.
"At least they'd still be alive." Emma retorted and Peter glared at the stubborn blonde. He suddenly grasped her wrists in his hands, immediately grabbing her attention. She gave him a surprised look at his sudden forcefulness. Peter always had a way of surprising her in the strangest of times.
"Don't say things like that about yourself." He told her seriously and Emma was slightly stunned by the emotion in his eyes. It was that same surprising dominance he showed whenever he tried to take control over a situation. He reminded her of Steve in that way…Steve would usually tell her the same thing. "Promise me that you'll stop talking like that, Emma. Please?" Emma was left breathless by the look in his eyes. She wasn't sure why he seemed so demanding but she felt inclined to take his request to heart.
"Fine. I will." Peter seemed satisfied by her answer and returned his attention to the screen. Emma gave him a curious look as something about Peter began to bother her.
"Have you ever been in love?" Emma asked him randomly, causing Peter to look back at her in shock.
She didn't blame him for being so shocked since Emma wasn't completely sure why she had asked him that question. Well, Emma kind of knew why. She had always wondered if Peter had real feelings for Liz. Emma wasn't as accustomed to social norms as most people but she knew enough to know it was probably bad that she was glad Liz was gone. She was glad the pretty older girl moved but she still wondered from time to time if Peter might've cared deeply for Liz. She joked around a lot about him being in love with Liz but Emma was kind of scared that he might've actually been in love with her.
"What?" He questioned and Emma shrugged.
"Well, you seem so pro-love that I'm just curious." Emma told him and Peter gave her an odd look, scrunching his nose up in a way that Emma found adorable.
"Pro-love? I don't think you can be pro-love…love isn't a thing that you can just be for or against. Everyone's felt love for someone or something." Peter said.
"Yeah, except for serial killers." Emma told Peter with a teasing smirk on her face. "I don't think Ted Bundy loved people…well, maybe he loved killing people so that counts for something." Peter really couldn't believe Emma's weird humor sometimes. Her kind of humor was something that made you laugh but feel bad for laughing afterwards.
"Do you think I'm a serial killer?" Emma asked once again but this time more bluntly. Peter was snapped out of his thoughts about Emma's humor to give her another surprised look. This time he couldn't tell whether or not Emma was kidding. She had a complete straight face.
"What do you mean?" Peter asked in bewilderment.
"I've killed a lot of people so does that make me a serial killer? That question never occurred to me before now." Emma muttered but Peter didn't think she was upset by any means…just curious. How many girls in the world asked someone whether or not they were a serial killer? Not many…probably only Emma.
"I don't think you're a serial killer…I mean, serial killers enjoy killing people. You didn't enjoy killing people so that makes it different." Peter told her and Emma was somehow doubtful.
"I wished I had been a serial killer instead of an assassin because at least it would've been my own choice. It could've been like a fun game with a cool serial killer name and everything…I'd probably have a menacing name like the Zodiac did. I wonder what kind of serial killer I would've been? The kind who chops people into little pieces and eats them or maybe the kind that has sex with their dead victims?" Peter stared incredulously at her before Emma started laughing at him. The look on Peter's face was too priceless to Emma. It was times like this that Peter wondered why he was attracted to Emma when she said the weirdest things. He supposed it was because it was just Emma being Emma.
"That's not…uh…very funny. You can't just joke about serial killers like that." Peter told her and Emma just looked at him as she calmed down from her fit of laughter.
"Why not, Parker? I think it's hilarious." Emma said teasingly before a more serious look came over face. "Don't think I didn't notice how you deflected that question about love. So what is it? Have you ever been in love…in love with Liz maybe?" Peter ran a hand over his face out of frustration because the last thing he needed was for the girl he was in love with to be asking him whether or not he was in love with a different girl. How could Peter get himself out of this one without revealing his true feelings for her?
"I was never in love with Liz, Emma." Peter said tiredly and Emma analyzed the expression on his face. As far as she was aware she could tell that he was telling the truth. Peter was a terrible liar so there was no way he could fool her there. Emma then pretended to examine her nails as she tried to remain uncaring about the whole thing.
"Really? Not even a little? You sure drooled over her a lot." Emma remarked and Peter groaned.
"God, no. Okay? I just…well, how do I say this without sounding like a jerk?" Peter said before he finally confessed the truth. "Fine! I liked her because she was Liz Allan, the prettiest and most popular girl at Midtown." Emma gave Peter a bored look.
"You're right. You can't say that without sounding like an asshole." Emma deadpanned and Peter rolled his eyes at her.
"Yes, yes. I know how it sounds and I'm sorry for sounding like an asshole." Peter said and Emma smirked at him.
"Well, if Liz Allan was smart she should've used her good looks for manipulation." Emma said vaguely and Peter looked at her questioningly.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I was taught, for example, that if I needed to then I could use my good looks to get morons like you to do whatever I wanted." Emma told him and once again Peter had to question whether or not Emma was being serious. Peter furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He probably should've been offended that Emma just called him a moron but at this point he was used to her name calling. She called everyone names. Peter was just glad he wasn't a narcissistic asshole like Mr. Stark used to be to Emma.
"Wouldn't that be like using men for your own gain?" He questioned and Emma looked at him like the answer was actually quite obvious.
"Well, they shouldn't be stupid enough to fall for that shit. Anyways…men use women all the time and then women use men just as often. It's a never ending cycle. Look at Pepper and Tony. He'll never admit it but Tony will do anything for Pepper. It's actually pretty sad to watch." Emma said cynically which only seemed to confuse Peter even more.
"What are you talking about? Don't girls like it when a guy does stuff for them? " Peter asked her before his eyes widened in realization about what he just said. "Wait…I didn't mean it like that. I-I actually meant-" Emma just rolled her eyes at him as she interrupted him.
"I don't care about your accidental sexism." Emma told him before continuing. "It's a power trip, Peter. Some women think it's fun and it probably is."
"That's kind of messed up." Peter told her and Emma shrugged.
"I guess so but don't worry…I'd never manipulate you." Emma said to him and Peter's eyes scanned her face as if he were trying to decide whether or not she was telling the truth.
"Really? How would I know if you were manipulating me or not?" Peter asked her but she could tell by the smile on his face that he wasn't being serious. Emma gave him a mischievous look as she leaned in a bit closer to him.
"That's easy." Emma started to say and Peter was suddenly very tempted by her close proximity. He tried not to let his eyes drift down towards her lips. She always made him incredibly nervous when she was this close to him. "First, I'd tell you that I thought your dorky Star Wars shirt looked good on you." Emma whispered and Peter swallowed nervously.
"Then I'd say that how hot I think it is that you're into Star Wars." Emma told him flirtatiously and Peter could feel his heart pounding against his chest. She was so close to him that Peter could practically feel her warmth. The overwhelming urge to kiss her became almost unbearable to him. That dream he had of her made him yearn for Emma even more. He hadn't been able to get that dream of her out of his head. Emma put her hand over his as she locked eyes with him. Everything suddenly became way too much for Peter between Emma's closeness and her flirtatious tone. He just couldn't handle it anymore.
"Finally, I'd tell you how much I want you to-" However, Peter didn't let her finish as he threw her hand off his and stood up from the couch abruptly, his heart racing and his face an embarrassing shade of red. Emma laughed at the look on his face but Peter didn't weakly scold her like he had the last few times she teasingly flirted with him. He sent her an angry and frustrated glare.
"What's wrong with you?!" Peter said angrily and Emma immediately stopped laughing, becoming curious at his angry reaction. Most of the time when she teased him like that he got all bashful but never angry.
"Relax, Parker, I wasn't being serious or anything." Emma told him, not understanding why Peter seemed angry. Peter huffed as he continued to glare at her.
"No, of course not. You're never serious." Peter spat as he clenched his jaw in anger. Emma glared right back him as she tried to determine what had Peter in this particular mood all of a sudden. He was fine a couple minutes ago. What caused him to be in such an abrupt and sudden pissy mood?
"I don't know what your problem is! It's not like I was actually hitting on you." Emma said as she defended herself.
"You don't get it, do you? You always do this…you always make fun of me and tease me." Peter shot back at her. "I'm sick and tired of it."
"You're being too sensitive, Peter. You know that I didn't mean any of it." Peter scoffed.
"That's the problem! You never mean it." Peter shook his head furiously as he was overwhelmed by so many feelings. Confusion, anger, love, and frustration. There was only so much that he could take. "I don't understand you! I don't know why you do this to me!" Emma just glared at Peter.
"Well, I don't understand you either! I don't get why you're so angry!?" Emma argued as she tried think about whether or not she did something wrong. She always teased Peter but he had never lashed out like this before. "It's almost like you wanted me flirt with you for real."
"Don't you get it?! You taunt me all the time and it's so frustrating because I know you can never really feel that way about me. You're showing me something I can never have. I'm angry because I love you!" Peter blurted suddenly, unable to to help himself as the words seemed to tumble out of his mouth. "I'm in love with you, Emma."
Emma stared wide eyed at Peter for what felt like hours. She had never been more shocked in her life than she had in that moment. Peter stood there heavily breathing as he calmed down from his fit of anger. His heart was pounding against his chest and the shock took over as he realized what he just said in the midst of all his anger. Peter prided himself on controlling his feelings for Emma but he seemingly let the one secret he had been holding in to come out. He was never good at keeping secrets but this secret had been an exception for a while…until now.
Emma froze as she tried to process what Peter had just told her. Had she heard him wrong maybe? Had she imagined what he said…that he loved her? It couldn't have been something he actually said. Emma had secretly wanted Peter to feel that way but she hadn't really thought he ever would. She stared at him, probably looking like an idiot, as she tried think of something to say. What Peter told her didn't really seem to compute for her as she sat there staring at him with a dumbfounded expression on her face. The blonde was completely speechless.
Peter was embarrassed at what he just said especially as Emma stared back at him in shock…almost as if she were horrified by what he just blurted out. Peter blushed again but not in anger. He was completely humiliated by his own big mouth. Whatever friendship Emma and him had was now ruined by his declaration of love. Everything had been going so well between them but he just had to ruin it, didn't he? Tears of embarrassment welled up in his eyes as he looked away from her. He was unable to look her in the eyes any longer.
"I need to be alone." Peter told her quietly before turning back around and heading for the stairs. Emma watched him leave with the same shocked expression on her face. She could've called after him to stop or wait but she didn't. Emma couldn't bring herself to tell him that she loved him back.
What was wrong with her?
Sunday was the day they returned to the city as usual but the car ride back home wasn't filled with chatter like it normally was. Things were horribly awkward as Peter and Emma sat in the backseat of the car while Happy drove them home. Emma couldn't catch any sleep the night before as her mind went back over what Peter said. He loved her…that's what he said to her the night before after all. Could it really be true? Could Peter Parker actually be in love with her? It seemed like it might've all been a part of Emma's imagination but she could tell it wasn't. The way Peter avoided her company Sunday morning proved to her that she hadn't imagined it. This was certainly something she never expected to have to deal with and she was more scared than ever before.
It had been terrifying admitting to herself that she loved Peter but that was when she thought he didn't feel the same way. Now that she knew he was in love with her that changed things. She knew that she could've told him that she felt the same but what would that mean? Where would they go from there? Did that mean that Peter wanted a romantic sort of relationship with Emma? More than likely. Did that mean things would be far more complicated than they already were? Probably. Emma just didn't know what to do.
She could tell him the truth but that was more terrifying than anything. Emma loved Peter but she didn't know if she could have any sort of relationship with him. How could she when she knew she could never be the kind of girlfriend that he imagined for himself? Maybe Peter was just disillusioned by the idea of loving her. Maybe he only thought he loved her because they spent so much time together. Peter was gravely mistaken if he thought she was anything like Liz or Betty. Emma couldn't be like that…not even for him.
It just wasn't in her nature.
"Tony's been acting weird lately…at least towards me." Emma said as she tried to make small talk with Peter. He looked to be entirely focused on his phone and didn't even look up at her when she spoke. "I guess it might be because of the wedding. There's apparently a lot of planning to be done even if Tony and Pepper haven't set a date yet." There was still no answer.
"Have you finished your history homework yet?" Emma inquired as she continued to try and get his attention. "If you need any help you only need to ask. I know how boring history is for you." Emma realized then that Peter probably wasn't going to respond to her small talk. She was going to have to stop beating around the bush and confront him about this. Emma leaned in closer to him so that Happy wouldn't overhear her from the front seat. Peter stiffened from her close proximity.
"Maybe we should talk about what happened last night?" Emma suggested and Peter swallowed, still not meeting her gaze. "Peter, I don't want things to be weird-"
"They're already weird, Emma." Peter told her scathingly as he interrupted her. "I don't want to talk about this. Just forget it." Peter then pointedly ignored her as he plugged in his earbuds to listen to music. He obviously didn't want to talk anymore and Emma couldn't even pretend that she wasn't hurt. Peter turned to face the other direction and Emma was forced to look out the window on her side so Peter wouldn't be able to see the expression on her face.
She wanted to say she loved him but she just didn't know how. When she told Steve she loved him it was easier. There was no complications from it and Emma didn't have to worry about what it mean later on down the road. Steve and her were family so it was quite easy to tell him that she loved him. Peter, however, was much different. Emma didn't know what telling him would mean for the both of them. She was scared. It was times like these that Emma wished that Steve was here to tell her what to do. He'd know what to do in a situation like this. She tried to think about what he would tell her to do but Emma wasn't sure. She didn't think he would tell her what she wanted to hear. Emma continued to stare out the window as she wondered where her grandfather was...if only he was there with her. He'd know exactly what to say.
Emma never needed Steve more than she did in that moment right then and there.