A/N: *EDIT*
Aaaaaand no one is reviewing.
Also, trolls are back with a vengeance.
Check the reviews if you don't believe me, its absurd!
Notifications are messed up again, pretty sure I posted this HOURS ago.
Yet for some reason it only appeared just now? I don't know what's wrong with the site.
That hurts. Really hurts, given the amount of flames I've had to delete time and again. Death threats, curses, nasty words you can't even begin to imagine. Which brings us to another matter:
Where did I do wrong?
I'm at my wits end here. I don't know what else to say. I thought everyone would be happy with daily updates. I thought I was making a difference. It really felt like that, you know? But somewhere along the lines, things changed in the blink of an eye. Not only did the reviews for Shielder vanish, but they were replaced with insults, foul language, and curses. Dozens of them, if not more. Look at the latter if you don't believe me, I left them up so people can see.
Do you want me to cry? Do you want to break my spirit? It feels like that sometimes, despite a few fans.
For every kind review is simply being drowned beneath a wave of vitriol, time and again.
What did I do wrong? Who did I upset? I just wanted make people happy.
I thought I was making people happy. I...I thought I was.
I'll probably be insulted for getting upset now, too.
But I wrote this, so...here, I suppose.
I hope you enjoy the chapter.
I used to enjoy writing.
I don't...enjoy much.
Not anymore.
"You embody that which I lack."
"And what's that?"
"Hope."
~?
A Most Unlikely Teacher
"You alright there, teacher?"
Scathach nearly recoiled when she first heard Naruto say that word. Her? How long had it been since someone-anyone?-called her such? She was no such thing. Teachers didn't send their students to die. Teacher's didn't bathe in the blood of their enemies on the battlefield. She hadn't taught anyone for quite some time. Not since the Hound of Ulster. Not since Setanta. Not since Cú Chulainn. The thought of her old pupil made her frown again. Was he here, too? Had he joined this war of his own volition, or had he been dragged into it by one of the factions? Likely the former. That one always enjoyed a good brawl.
Which brought her back to the matter at hand.
She did not consider herself to be teacher by any means or measure.
So when someone actually addressed her as such, well. Her reaction was purely instinctual.
"Do not call me that." she swatted her Master on the back of the head in recompense as they walked.
To his credit, Naruto didn't tumble forward into the least. He simply laughed as caught himself, bounded off an upturned cart for leverage and sprang back into the street-heedless of several early morning risers shooting him baffled looks-to return to her side. Only then did he finally register that she'd clobbered him at all. His reaction proved almost comical by comparison.
"OW!" a soft hiss greeted her as he rubbed the rising welt on the back of his skull. "Why'd ya hit me?! I was just being honest."
In a rare moment of exasperation, the Queen of the Land of Shadows threw her hands up in the air. "Because I'm not worthy of such a title."
"I think you are." to her dismay, her contractor refused to be swayed. "You gave me your spear, remember?"
"But I didn't teach you anything." she attacked the flaw in his logic ruthlessly.
"Yes, you did." Naruto argued. "You just don't realize it, yet."
Scathach most assuredly did not miss a step just now. It was the street's fault. Yes. That was it. These cobblestones were still slick from the storm and the blistering damage it had wrought to the town. That was it. That caused her slip, the tiniest slide of her right heel before she managed to find balance once more. So she blamed the street. Definitely. Not. Her fault. Not at all. Still, she couldn't quite conceal the spark of confusion his words had stirred in her just now. Her troublesome master was most assuredly smiling now, looking inordinately pleased with himself. Like a cat that just ate a canary.
Was...was he actually being cryptic?
And why did he persist on calling her his teacher?
What could she possibly have taught him to make him respect her this much?
Try as she might, Scathach couldn't find an answer. Thus, she was forced to draw her own conclusions. At the end of the day she was little more than a murderer; a wraith, one whom death had forsaken. Or had she died already? Theoretically, it shouldn't be possible for her to be summoned at all. She shouldn't be here. She was unable to be slain. Eternal. Immortal. Death feared her. Yet here she was, preparing for a war she knew next to nothing about, fighting another battle for the sake of another.
And then there was the boy-no, the young man-who had called here here in the first place.
She risked a glance at him from the corner of her eye.
Scathach knew him of course, else she never would've answered the summons in the first place. In a certain light he almost looked the same as he had on that stormy night. All that death in his world had torn the veil for the merest of minutes, allowing them to meet. She'd given him one of her spears on a whim, had seen that spark of raw potential lurking in him. He'd done much to cultivate it since she'd seen him last. More than that, he had cultivated himself; she could even sense that he was hiding his true appearance under a restriction of some sort.
He saw her staring and dared a smile, one she mirrored as they walked.
There was a weight to his shoulders now, a dirge of years that betrayed his youthful appearance. Hmm. That certainly hadn't been there before. He wielded her spear well enough she supposed; given that he was able to put up good fight when she'd attacked him. That intrigued her most of all. Perhaps he might be able to kill her yet. He was...adequate, and that was HIGH praise coming from one such as her!
Only then did she realize that he'd been speaking to her for quite some time now.
...teacher? Lancer? Hello?" a hand waved before her face. "Scathach! Are you in there?"
"I told you not to call me that." she muttered crossly, shooting him a mild glower for his trouble.
"And I deny your denial." he chirped.
They walked in companionable silence for another minute, neither willing to speak.
"Well, what is it, then?" a pale brow rose.
"Nothing." her student beamed. "I'm just glad you're here."
She considered rebuking him. In the end, she gave up and kept walking.
He most assuredly didn't see the small, secretive smile that plucked at the corner of her mouth.
Well!
So was she.
So was she, indeed.
(...0o0o0...)
The attack came at dawn.
They had taken a circuitous route around the length of the town, more a patrol than anything else to prepare themselves for the battles to come. Scathach hadn't expected an assault at all, rather, her thoughts were down and focused inward; as such, she wasn't paying proper attention to her surroundings when it came. The same, however, could not be said of her Master.
Because the boy went tense.
Scathach detected the rush of mana not a heartbeat later, a vicious and furious thing bearing down on them from the North like a freight train. Still distant, but rapidly approaching, angling to meet them even as they slowed. Bloodlust swelled in the air like a living thing, rendering the world almost flat and grey by comparsion. And her Master had been the one to notice it first. Well done. The Witch of Dun Scaith raised her mental estimation of him that much higher as she turned to face this onrushing foe.
They leaped back as one, a sixth sense compelling them to act, to leap, to MOVE-
And the street erupted.
A dark and jagged thing rammed into the street they'd just occupied at breakneck speed; striking with the force of a hundred men to send a towering plume of dust and dirt shooting into the sky like an earthen geyser. In the ensuing haze Scathach caught herself frowning, alighting atop a nearby lamp-post with all the skill of a graceful dancer. Below she heard rather than saw Naruto land atop the ragged ruins of a building. She heard the faintest rush of air rise from his palm, and quite suddenly, the fog of war vanished, replaced with crystal clarity.
She sorely wished he hadn't done that.
Someone struck him and his body crashed backwards through a wall.
"Aw, damnit." the rough, drawling voice of their attacker pierced the gloomy dawn. "I thought I'd kill him with that."
Something in Scathach-she never knew what-froze when she heard those words.
No.
She recognized that voice.
No.
That familiar presence.
No.
It couldn't be.
But it was. Though his body was hideous she still found it recognizable underneath it all; even gazing overlong at that bleak and blackened bur of dark steel and wicked spikes tapering offs into a tail. His broad chest was left bare, exposing a seething crimson tattoo etched upon the tan flesh there. Monstrous. Her very soul recoiled at the sight. Even the tattered hood he wore did precious little to conceal his identity. Those vicious red eyes betrayed him all the same, feral rubies framed by a once handsome and now marked face alongside a messy crop of wild blue hair. With that, her worst fears were confirmed.
...no. Not you." she whispered. "It can't be you."
Even the spear he held was twisted, warped by what he'd become. Its very form radiated an aura of blood and hate and madness the like of which she'd never known. Her gift to him, corrupted by the what he'd become, a curse, a blight, an aberration that she wanted gone from her sight. She couldn't say it. Couldn't speak his name; because that would be tantamount to admitting the truth. Ireland's child of light, corrupted into a bitter star of cold, absolute darkness.
Cú Chulainn.
"Hey, teach." Pearly white teeth flashed out at her in a ghastly rictus of a grin, garish in its arrogance. "You look good for a dead woman. Did you get better or something?"
Naruto clawed his way out of the rubble and stepped forward, drawing her pupil's gaze.
A glint of surprise, then anger burned hideous and bright in that wretched face.
"Ho?" he tilted his head. "You gave someone else one of your spears?"
Of course, Naruto wouldn't let that slide. "Who in blazes are you?"
That grin grew. "Berserker. Also, your death."
Rather than attack-and Scathach was fully prepared to intervene if he did-the whiskered warrior drew himself upright, shouldered his lance, and stood. A fist rose to his cheek, wiping a smear of bloody dirt away from his chin as he turned to face his attacker. Stoically, he took hold of a dislocated shoulder and popped it back in with a soft hiss of pain. Blue eyes narrowed into hooded slits, but once again, he made no move to approach at all. She silently commended him for his restraint.
"Look," he began slowly, choosing his words with great care as he rolled his right shoulder, "whoever you are...I don't have any quarrel with you. Just let us pass and we'll be on our way."
"Really now?" Berserker tilted his head. "Aren't you the least bit curious?"
"Why would I be curious about someone like you?"
"To see if you measure up." Cu grinned.
"To what?" his hackles rose again.
"Why, the real deal, of course." that grin only grew. "After all, you're just a kid with a sharp stick. Do you even know how to use that thing?"
Naruto absolutely hissed.
If there was one thing he couldn't tolerate, one insult he absolutely could not stand, it was that one. He'd worked for his strength. To mock all that he'd done, all that he had sacrificed to get this far...he couldn't stand it in the least. No insult, however frivolous, however cruel, could compare to stand in the face of such slander. His pulse quickened. His heart began to pound, roaring in his head like the call of a great beast out for blood. Foul scarlet draped itself over his vision, dappling the world in crimson.
"Take that back." the words were a growl.
Cu cackled. "Make me, runt."
Naruto stepped forward, and when Scathach tried to stop him, he eeled out of her grasp and started forward.
"What are you doing?! Stop! You don't want to do this!"
"I do."
"Why settle for one?" Cu tilted his head as he too, stepped forward to meet him. "Lets make this interesting. You always said you wanted to die, right, sensei?"
A rush of air at her back served as her only warning.
Instinct saved her; years of honed training brought her spear around to deflect the cruel stab aimed at her neck. Her former pupil leered at her across their intertwined lances, sneering as she began to slide back under the overwhelming strength he possessed. When she struck out of him with her secondary weapon, that hideous jagged tail curled up and caught her wrist, ensnaring her further.
"Allow me to grant your wish-GACK?!"
Berserker's would-be lung found itself stalled as Naruto's booted foot slid between his ribs and catapulted him away into a building. It barely slowed him at all. Rather than barrel through a crumbling wall, the mad lancer jolted upright again, gave himself a mighty shake and laughed. His smirk reminded Scathach of hungry wolf rather than a deranged dog. Once more that dark, exultant peal of laughter flashed across his marked face and burst out into the early morning light.
"Well! Color me surprised! Looks like you can move after all!" he clawed a thin line of blood out of his eyes. "A little fight in ya, eh? I like that."
His prey dropped into a stance.
"Give it up, kid. You're no Servant. You're only human."
Naruto grinned, a sharp, sharkish smile that looked almost inhuman.
"You're right. A human has no chance. Unfortunately for you...I'm not human."
A tan arm rose ponderously and slammed into his stomach like a roaring sledgehammer.
Blond hair turned white. Horns sprouted. An eye opened in the center of his forehead as his once tan skin turned ghostly pale, the color of ash against flesh. His mouth opened in a wordless roar, perfect teeth sharpening into dangerous fangs. All the while his body convulsed. Wide, rippling eyes bloomed through blue as his body shook. White robes wrapped around his unassuming attire, completing the ghastly look. Scathach sucked in a sharp breath as the mana flowing through her doubled, then tripled, leaving her skin buzzing with unrestrained energy.
By the spirits, what was he?
"Processing. Breaking limits." he recited the words on rota, cold and cruel. "Seals unlocked. Body unshackled. Chakra paths unblocked. Eyes opened. Release restraint level...
"ZERO."
Cu barely had time to blink before a the blunt end of a spear hammered into the side of his face and dented his cheek. This time the blackened Berserker actually flew through a building. Granted, he was up just as fast, but this time he was decidedly limping. That was a marked improvement to the paltry kick Naruto had delivered before. Unfortunately, it had the added effect of riling him up like never before.
The mad wolf outright roared.
"Aha! That's more like it! C'mere, brat!"
Without thought to his own safety he lunged at him.
An arrow caught him in the side, strangling his assault in mid-leap.
The impact was nothing short of explosive, just as swift as it was abrupt.
By contrast, the startled squawk he gave was satisfying; most satisfying indeed.
Stuck at just the right angle, the arrow took him low and hard in the waist; then momentum seized Berserker hard and sent him tumbling away into the street. Blood spattered across the cobblestones with every impact, a wicked velocity that sent the mad warrior crashing through building and cart alike until he finally tumbled to a halt. He'd only just risen again when another arrow found him again-spearing him low in the leg with a visceral red spatter that brought him to one knee.
"Oi!" Berserker snarled, propping himself up on his spear. "What the hell?! Who did that?!"
An absolute behemoth crashed down atop him, planting a giant foot on the warrior's mangled leg, drawing another grow from the crazed hunter. Even as Berserker surged upright, a giant hand closed around his ruined leg and flung him away, spear and body alike, uncaring for the outrage in the former's shriek.
Scathach's eyes got.
Really.
Big.
To call the man a giant would've been a disservice, for he was larger than any man she'd ever seen. Tall and broad shouldered, he wore little in the way of any true armor, eschewing almost entirely in the favor of the taut skin of a golden lion to protect his back from harm. His tan skin gleamed in the early morning light, rippling beneath a sleeveless red tunic and a pelt of furs to conceal some semblance of modesty. Even that stern visage bore a hint of nobility, from the firm set of his jaw to the dark mane of hair spilling over his back.
And the eyes...there weren't even words for those furious, burning slits. It was not a god, but it was close. Very close.
"Retreat, Berserker of Black." his very words shook the ground underfoot. "This is no longer your battle."
"Aw, screw it." Cu actually swore. "I'm not ready to fight you, big guy."
In a flash of golden dust, he began to retreat; his corporeal form vanishing like so much ash the on the wind. No one was fooled by it; he was simply dematerializing, running away to fight another day. Scathach cursed at him silently, cursed herself for not being able to do more, cursed the shock that had caused her to hesitate. Not again, Never again. The next time they met she would not allow herself to hesitate. She would strike his head from his shoulders, slay him where he stood.
But those red eyes glowered still, at her and Naruto both, but so furiously at her.
"Just you wait, Teacher!" she flinched. "This ain't over! I'll be back!"
The demigod stood silently for a long, ponderous moment.
Only when Berserker vanished did he deign to move.
Then he turned and Naruto tensed.
"Please, be at ease." his voice was a slow moving avalanche, "I mean you no harm; we are on the same side. I am Archer of Red."
A breath blew out of Scathach that she hadn't even realized she'd been holding.
She had no desire to face something that could cripple Cu with a single shot, much less force him to retreat. There was only one Servant that wielded such skill and strength with a bow that tall, and a pair of swords so terribly large, one entity that wore a golden lion's pelt over his shoulders as thought it were little more than a harmless cloak. If that didn't narrow it enough, there was the Servant's sheer size and those raw musculature to consider. No, the list of names had been narrow to begin with, but their savior had just narrowed the field all the further. She almost smiled.
Archer of Red knelt before them. Even then, he towered over Master and Servant alike.
Scathach raised a brow. "Ah. You must be Heracles, then. Quite impressive. You're Archer, you say?"
"Indeed." came the effortless, answering rumble. "Though I served my lord as a Berserker in a previous life."
His gaze shifted to an unlikely blond as he said lord, leaving no doubt of whom he spoke.
Naruto and Scathach exchanged a disbelieving glance.
Finally, the former found his voice.
...excuse me?"
A/N: There.
Scathach is best teacher, feel free to convince me otherwise.
Folks asked for Berserker!Cu, and they got him. He's Berserker of Black, if it weren't obvious. Before anyone complains this is a different sort of Berserker Cu. He runs hot, and he can't stand seeing the sight of someone with Scathach, much less wielding her spear. We didn't really get to see him fight to his full strength in this chapter, but ohhhhhh its coming.
Will he be redeemed?
Or perhaps broken further? Who knows.
Then we have True Archer Heracles, who is an absolute MONSTER of a Servant. Yes, he's from A Most Unlikely Card, if that wasn't obvious. Of course, Naruto doesn't recognize him, which brings the zaniest of shenanigans about. There, I've said all I'm going to say. Keep voting for Servants, because the roster fills out again next chapter.
I own no references or quotes.
I don't have it in me to ask for reviews.
No previews. I don't have the heart for them.
I'm sorry, but that's the long and short of things now.
I'll see you guys and gals later, I guess. Maybe. I don't know.
Have a nice day/evening, wherever you are, and may your life be brighter than mine.
~Nz.