PIECES AND HEARTS
"Y-your majesty… W-what can I do for you?"
"At ease" he said watching the woman parting her stance, although the tension didn't disappear from her shoulders. "What is your name?"
"M-Ming, your majesty"
"Ming" He had walked straight inside wearing his hooded robe, just as the sun peeked over the horizon. Stumbling over three disgruntled guards, before finding her familiar features patrolling the top floors. "You've been working here long?"
"Huh… Six months, your majesty"
"There is no need to call me that, please" he asked. She was clearly nervous for which he was somewhat thankful. It would do him no good to have someone questioning the presence of a royal, here of all places.
"Right, huh, sir" She said licking her lips.
"Thanks, I was wondering if you could do me a favor."
"Anything for a Fire Prince" She was smiling more eagerly now and Zuko couldn't help but join in, producing a small basket.
"Make sure to search it, and if anyone asks, you were given an order understand?" Ming frowned, she reached out but hesitated in taking it. Her eyes weary and Zuko couldn't really blame her. "It's for General Iroh, he might be a traitor, but he is still my uncle and he deserves a nice meal once in a while. I hope you can understand."
"Of course, sir."
"Thank you" He was about to move away when he stopped short, a memory from long ago suddenly striking him with its bitterness. Gulping slowly, he brushed away the feel of his tears and looked back at Ming. "One more thing, I don't think the general and I are on the best terms, would you please not mention this came from me? I would really appreciate it."
"Oh, huh… O-of course sir."
Smiling sadly, Zuko offered her a nod and sneaked out of the prison by the same path he came from, avoiding the guards as best as he could. Out in the sun, he walked all the way back to the city, watching the populated streets flooding with nobles. They went around in their fancy clothes, chatting about the state of the world. You think there will be new colonies soon? My son would do well ruling one. Ba Sing Se has so many riches, I wonder what will arrive here now. The Fire Lord is surely to declared the war over soon, my children will finally come home. I say we take care of them, you know? Those rebels, our forces have been far too lenient. Earth kingdom people are all trash if you ask me. And so it went, with them barely realizing how sheltered they were, how mistaken. It made him sick.
Closer to the palace, he made a turn.
Zuko went to her.
It wasn't an easy choice.
Honestly, if he could choose, he would've come back before this whole mess even started, but now that it was done, he felt no other path beyond doing the right thing, and that might mean breaking one of his best friends' heart.
As he walked inconspicuously through the street, Zuko tried to think the words through, over and over again he rehearsed them in his head. Guards tried to stop him at the gates until he removed his hood, their behavior changing immediately, servants arriving out of nowhere offering apologies and compliments that would have amused him if he wasn't so nervous.
She was waiting for him
Of course she was, either that, or she was simply bored out of her mind, using the divan to stretch herself out.
"Zuko, what a surprise."
"Hi Mai" he greeted her, watching the gigantic living room. It was empty, for which he was glad. "I was wanting to see you."
"Well, I'm glad you did" she got up, but he held her back a little bit. Her passive expression became confused, her brows knitted. "What is it?"
"Is there a private place for us to talk?"
"This is private, you thought I was going to kiss you in front of people or something?"
He couldn't help but chuckle, yes this was Mai all right. Agni, he missed her. "You're right, sorry"
A frown etched itself in Mai's face as she looked him over, Zuko felt almost naked under her scrutiny, she knew there was something happening, of course she knew. This was the same woman he made his head of intelligence once.
"I have to talk to you about some things" He finally said, unable to stand the silence.
"Things huh? Please tell me you're not getting sappy Zuko, you know I hate that"
She offered him one of her small smiles, fleeting. "Actually, I think I might be, but that is not the case now"
"What is it then?" He took a deep breath, quietly asking permission to seat across from her. His hands were sweating, at his back he could feel the sun sinking to the west over Capital City. "You're different."
He blinked looking over her, silently asking for clarification.
"You're different. I mean, you were different before, after you joined Azula, but ever since we arrived you're different again. Back at the ship you were nervous, now you stand there seeming so sure of yourself" She frowned again, leaning back over the soft cushions. "I take your father said some nice things to you or something."
"No" He thought he would start this with explanations, with long speeches and justifications, reasons and more reasons, the same way he would need to convince a council or a mayor about new politics. Instead he caught himself blurting out the truth. "I'm going to join the Avatar"
The cup fell and shattered on the ground, the scream of a thousand pieces of porcelain spreading across the floor as Mai's features remained completely blank. Almost immediately a door banged open and a skinny young servant hurried to see the mess…
"Oh, my, mistress Mai, what happened?" She said going to clean, until Mai raised a hand.
"Leave us..."
"But..."
"I said, leave us." She never raised her voice, but Zuko could tell she was angry all the same, it was all in the rigid way she moved, so unlike her more elegant motions. When the door closed again, she fixed him under her gaze. "Is this your idea of a joke Zuko? Because you know I hate jokes."
"I'm aware of that."
"The Avatar is dead, you killed him."
"That was a lie, Mai, Azula said that so I can fall in disgrace when he shows up again alive."
"So what, you're doing this just to get back at her?"
"I think you know me better than that" immediately she looked away, and Zuko felt the balance tipping. This was dangerous, he repeated to himself. One false step and he could end up in prison, or worse. His uncle was always teaching him how to be patient, and he liked to think he learned over the years. He waited for Mai.
"Why are you telling me this?"
"Because I thought you should know..." He paused. "Because I think you deserve to know."
"You want me to go with you?" She questioned and now he hesitated.
"I want you to choose your own path, Mai, despite what I do with my life."
He watched her hands brushing something inside her sleeves. Was she thinking of throwing a knife at him? "And you want to join the Avatar, why?"
"I think it's the right thing to do, I think the rest of the world is afraid of us. I saw it with my own eyes, and there is so much more than that. I believe we can be a better nation, one that doesn't rely on violence and cruelty, but something more, something stronger. A place where our people are safe and Ty Lee doesn't need to hide who she likes."
Her eye twitched, was she surprised he knew?
"I'm your girlfriend, shouldn't I get a say in this?"
Now his heart sunk. He couldn't escape this, he really couldn't. Speaking was worse than thinking it, because he didn't want to break her heart, he didn't want to hurt her and mostly, he would hate to die with a knife in the eye. Suki would be so mad if he did. Before he could say anything though Mai had taken one look at his lowered shoulders and snorted, he tried to speak anyway.
"Mai… I care about you a great deal but, I don't think I can love you like that." He looked down and closed his eyes. He was not sure what her reaction would be, but he knew she deserved his respect more than anything.
"You're breaking up with me"
"Yes"
"You're breaking up with me so you can join the Avatar?"
"No" He meet her gaze halfway, trying to let her know this was his decision. "I want us to break up because you deserve someone who is better for you Mai, I'm not that person. I'm not sure I ever was. I like you, I enjoy your company a great deal, but I can't lie and say our relationship is going to work out in the end."
"That is a pretty big talk coming from a traitor."
"I've always been one I guess" he said smiling wearily.
"If you don't love me, why did you come back then?"
I do love you, he wanted to reply, but that would blur too many lines and this conversation was already hard enough. His heart sinking, he thought of a boat so long ago, Azula's words. "I… I came back because Azula threatened my uncle upon our departure from the Earth Kingdom" He explained, watching her fingers twitching, her shoulders tensing slightly. He did his best to keep his body relaxed. As far as Mai knew he was a traitor and a liar, it wouldn't be any good to suddenly expect a fight.
"Do you love someone else? That peasant from Ba Sing Se, perhaps?"
"Peasant? What are..." He blinked, assaulted all of the sudden by the memory, yes, Jin. "No, I mean, currently I do love someone else, but is not her."
Mai's expression, which had eased for a brief moment when he denied her claim, suddenly took a turn for the somber. Downcast she rose from the divan in silence, walking towards her room.
"Mai..."
When he realized what was happening the knife had already hit the floor a finger away from his toes. Her voice was devoid of anything. "Leave"
He did.
The crew of thirty was reunited in the bowls of the ship, a small number of people, basically the essential for a vessel of that size, and now she was just hoping they would keep being thirty.
Taking a deep breath she stepped into the deck, walking amongst the men in her own scarlet robes, loose pants, and soldier boots which fit her just right. Thank Agni for the Fire Nation's unisex military policy. The golden fans were the only thing identifying her as a Kyoshi Warrior, and she displayed them proudly at her hips.
Standing before the crew, Suki took a deep breath. She could do this, she had led armies before, troops, small and big. This was nothing, and yet the fate of the whole world might depend on her success. She paused, letting the buzzing of whispered questions continue for a bit until General Jee shouted for silence.
"You all gathered here today must be aware that I was a prisoner until a moment ago, am I correct?" Nods. "Well, General Jee must have gone to you weeks ago, and he probably let you all know you were been called by your old leader, Prince Zuko. Am I to believe you're all loyal to him?"
More nods, and watchful eyes.
"To all of you, my name is Suki. I'm a Kyoshi Warrior and I come from the Earth Kingdom. I'm also an ally to your Prince, however what I'm about to tell is not a matter of loyalty, honor or duty in any way. The decision I'm about to ask of you, in full knowledge of Prince Zuko from the Fire Nation, is one each must make for themselves, am I clear?"
More whispers, this time though, a skinny, short man stepped forward, raising his hand. Suki nodded.
"What exactly are you saying, lady?"
"I'm saying that this ship is as of now, in service of the Avatar, and the balance of the world." Silence, deadly horrible silence, filled the space of the hold. "I know many of you have heard that the Avatar died in Ba Sing Se. I assure you it is not true. Whether you believe it or not though, you must decide what you're going to do. You've all traveled the world, you have been living in the Fire Nation for months, you know about prison camps, the policies and the war. I won't go on about that. I also won't speak about what Zuko wants, General Jee said you all served under him at some point, and so you also know his story and the kind of man he is."
"If any of you do not wish to commit treason, or believe Ozai to be the best for the Fire Nation, there will be no existing records of your association with us. You'll be set free at the shores of Fire Fountain city, and from there you can do as you wish. If you join us, be aware of what that will mean to yourselves and what you believe, be aware this will be a fight with consequences and danger." She took a deep breath, almost feeling like she was Fire Lady again. "In the end, what I'm asking is for you to help me free not only the world, but your own country, I'm asking for courage, faith and even a bit of snark."
There were a few smiles at her last words and she decided that was the moment. "If you choose to stay, please raise your hand."
Silence greeted the end of her speech, and for a long while she could hear the crew whispering amongst themselves, the muttering growing and diminishing as they slowly came to a decision.