Chapter 27: Dreams, Dames and Hallway Hootenanny!
"Hehehe, this actually sorta feels nice," Lincoln giggled, his fingers gracing his neck and throat. Somehow or another his inner throat was vibrating, just like how Cliff purred.
"Pretty sure Lisa had a hand in this somehow. Weird how it's the first time I ever noticed it, hahaha. Maybe cause I'm so high I'm more sensitive to sensations...or I'm totally imagining this, ahahahha!"
He kept his hand on his neck, feeling along his trachea; the most intense vibration came along the the top of his trachea just by his vocal cords. He wiggled a finger down his throat, gagging for a second from his gag reflex. He suppressed it and felt around the buzzing; he found the tissue that rippled the most, something he hadn't had before.
"That is weird. Cool, but weird. I gotta remember to check with Lisa and somehow sucker her into telling me what she did."
Lincoln tried to get off his bed. It seemed to take forever to roll over to his side and slip his legs off his bed.
"Okay...steady Lincoln, steady man, you can do this...okay...one...one...what came after one? Oh yeah, one...two...threeOHSHIT!"
Lincoln fell butt-first onto the ground, his legs failing him totally. It hurt for a moment, but he just ended up having a laughing fit on the ground, then pulled himself up back to his bed, almost pulling all his comforters off.
"Yeah, hahahaah, I am sooo not going anywhere. I better entertain myself till Luna gets back from whatever it is she's doing," Lincoln said, his upper body and head wobbling back and forth like a bobble-head. He reached his arm down for the new laptop his parents got him recently and popped it on.
"Oh...oh crud...DAMN IT! What was the password again?" Lincoln complained, realizing he forgot in his high state.
"I thought I might possibly forget the password...shit, what did I do to remind myself if I...crap," Lincoln whined, trying several possible combinations.
"Let's see...Clincoln MccLoud...nope, darn it...GodzillaRulz6969...nuupe...GodzillaRulz7272...shit...DANG IT, WHAT WAS IT?!" Lincoln shouted, about to toss the laptop. Then the password hint popped up.
"Huh...it says...try the diorama dummy...what's that mean?" Lincoln asked as he turned to the Godzilla melee battle diorama Lisa made him he had sitting underneath his King Ghidorah figure dangling above still.
With all his might, he fell to the ground and pulled himself across the carpet. The few feet of distance felt like a million miles for his gelatinous arms. Puffing and blowing from what felt like a thousand push ups, he pulled himself up with all his might, and looked all over his diorama.
"Okay...okay Loud, you can do this...I...I...I'm starting to remember I did something," Lincoln mumbled, his eyes feeling red and tired as he inspected all the kaiju to see if there were any clues.
He took a moment to really inspect them all, before one by one, he found a number and letter under a tail and foot of each kaiju. Lincoln jotted them all down one by one on some scratch paper. He still had enough sense to follow the pattern and the numbering till he found the last missing number and letter combo. He transferred the letters one by one in order of their number, before a light clicked in his head as he read the password and got flushed.
"LunaMyLove4Ever...teeeheeee, ehehehehehhe," Lincoln giggled, feeling his heart flutter. "That is so corny but so awesome," Lincoln swooned, finding a momentary bit of strength to walk a step backwards with the scratch paper in hand, falling backwards on his bed as the laptop bounced up in the air and landed right in his lap.
He laughed, then diligently focused on entering the password with a big goofy smile on his face.
"Maybe a little internet searching will help get my head on straight," Lincoln said, now feeling his skin tingle. He hovered the center mouse on Google and wondered what to search for.
"Huh...maybe I can look up how many times high people dream of meeting the Gods that write their entire lives, ahahahaahahaha! That was sooo trippy, not like it's real, right? Or maybe...maybe it could be true?"
Lincoln began to try typing; nothing. He looked down and saw his fingers were typing in the air just above the keys.
"Pffft, ya dummy Lincoln, focus! Now...da fuck was I about to type? Something...something fanfiction...something...dang it!" Lincoln growled with a laugh, "I flippin forgot! Crud...maybe another search will help kick my memory back on. Let's see what I got in my Google favorites."
Lincoln navigated to his favorites, a huge list of YouTube videos. His vision blurred from all the writing so he just randomly clicked on a button and the YouTube video came up.
"Ooh! Brave Little Toaster, I love this movie!" Lincoln said happily, laying his hands back as he was playing the movie at full screen on his laptop. He was at the scene when the toaster, blanket, vacuum, radio and light characters were about to go into a musical out in the forest.
"Teeheee, Luna would get a lil kick out of this," Lincoln said, thinking how Luna would like the coming song. He couldn't help but imagine Luna was curled next to him as he watched the movie.
And as they were about to sing, something funny manifested in Lincoln's mind. The toaster suddenly morphed into a slivery version of Luna, taking on Luna's curves.
"Whoa," Lincoln mumbled, then seeing the vacuum turn into Lori, the Radio into Luan, the blanket into Lily and Leni into the light.
"Double whoa, the heck?" Lincoln said, rubbing his eyes as suddenly he saw this group that were his sisters in cartoony appliance form sing, "Time fly by in the city of light, time stands still in the country, there's no time for a fuss and a fight, as we travel the laaaaaand."
Then Leni and Luan's versions had their duet, "And I'd be, satisfied, just to be, not denied," before they all began singing. Lincoln couldn't help but bust out laughing when Lori sang in such a deep tone.
"AHAHAAHAHAHH! Holy lordie that was trippy," Lincoln cheered, pausing the video, "but yeah, that didn't work. Let's try another."
Still not totally able to discern the words on screen, he pressed another red tabbed YouTube link randomly.
"Here, what's this...Godzilla! Woooooo! No way that can get fucky!" Lincoln said, punching the air as a Godzilla compilation from the entire series played.
"Just...just gonna rest my eyes for a moment," he said under his breath as he closed his eyes to let the giant monster rumbles lull him to relax. In his mind he could picture the scenes from the movie, this one being from Terror of MechaGodzilla when MechaGodzilla and Titanosaurus were facing off against Godzilla.
"Hehehe, get em G-man," Lincoln said as his imagination started constructing and playing the scene.
Then another curious thing happened again. His mind started...adding and adjusting some major details.
Lincoln was suddenly thrown into the scene in Godzilla's place, becoming the Final Wars Godzilla, except his skin color turned from charcoal-grey to pearly white kike his hair with some of his facial features, and he was facing off with what looked like a metallic cyborg version of himself, only a female version with an intense look on her, and to her left was Titanosaurs turning into Leni but with Leni's hair streaming along its sides.
"Holy crap! What the heck is goin on?" Lincoln roared out as Godzilla, covering his mouth with his claws.
"You're about to get your butt handed to you ya sexy beast," Leni-Titanosaurus said with what looked like a tranced lusty look, lording over white Godzilla-Lincoln. She was so much taller than him and he couldn't help but gulp hard, especially how Leni-Titanosaurus seemed to call him a sexy beast.
"Awwww, it's okay Godzilla-Lincy, I'll be gentle," Leni-Titanosaurus said, her tone sounding possessed and dangerous as she picked up Lincoln-Godzilla and throwing him in a huge hole in the ground. Female-Lincoln MechaGodzilla's eyes flashed its rainbow colored laser vision and shot missiles from her fingers and toes, blowing up the land all around him. Now his head was the only thing sticking out.
As he struggled out of the pit, an anthropomorphic moth with a monumental wingspan flew over and swirled all the dirt around White Godzilla-Lincoln, before it dropped down next to Lincoln.
"You okay bro? Take a sec, we got this," it said in a familiar voice, dropping its face down and pecking his nose in a little kiss. White Godzilla-Lincoln's vision cleared and it looked like an extremely busty and ass-heavy Luna in Mothra form, flying at full speed at Leni-Titanosaurus. A loud screech that sounded like Rodan followed behind her. It swooped down and pulled White Godzilla-Lincoln up to his clawed feet.
"There you go dude, now kick it into gear and kick their asses!" It said from his side, before a wing bounced off his head. He saw it to be a Rodan-like version of Lynn, swooping up violently high up and heading straight on with a cocky expression, right into Leni-Titanosaurus.
"...what the fuck is happening?" White Godzilla-Lincoln uttered, shocked and confused all to hell. In the distance he could have sworn he saw a huge golden flash high in the sky, bolts of lightening raining down in the distance as something eerie was cackling loudly.
"No way," White Godzilla-Lincoln grumbled nervously, recognizing the voice. The golden flash flew straight up in the atmosphere.
"Get ready buddy!" a gravely voiced called out suddenly from his feet. He looked down and saw a Clyde-like Anguirus come out. " I want to handle this one, aloooooone. I think I can reach her heart," Clyde-Anguirus cooed, before diving back underground and popping out in the far distance, dancing around on the surface to get the attention of the golden lightening storm in the distance, leaving a hole that a little Lana-Baragon peaked out of.
"Is this the fight? YES! Time to kick butt!" She said, shooting a lighting bolt from her horned head and running up to join the fight Mothra-Luna and Rodan-Lynn were having.
"Holy shit, the heck is happening?" White Godzilla-Lincoln mumbled, trying to get his bearings; he was so confused.
"We need to get that metal control panel off Leni-Titanosaurs dumby! Get in gear and form-up dunder-head!" A shrill voice he instantly recognized yelled. It was a Lola-looking Megaguiruis, hovering around Lincoln and shooting a patch of dirt in his face before joining the others attacking the Leni-Titanosaurus and female Lincoln MechaGodzilla."
"There is no way...NO WAY THIS IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!" White Godzilla-Lincoln roared out in mortified shock. To his right a huge blackish Lucy-like spider Kumunga walked slowly by. He looked down and roared out in fear, jumping straight into the air.
"Yup, this is me now, siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh," Lucy-Kumunga groaned, before moving all eight legs at full speed and spraying a huge amount of web at the two titans battling all the other titans.
"Good lord what's next?" White Godzilla-Lincoln groaned, before a huge furry form bounced to his side.
"WHOA!" He roared, stepping back to see a laughing Luan-like Kong gripping his shoulders jokingly.
"I just looooove to monkey around ya know? I'm the Queen of Konging, aahhaahahhahahhah! Get it?" Luan-Kong joked, White Godzilla-Lincoln gulping from how huge her breasts were, bouncing all over.
"Can't keep my audience waiting, I'm just apeping to get a good fist in, ahahahaha!" Luan-Kong giggled, before running full-speed and jumping straight into the huge melee happening in a gigantic pile of dust.
"I'm losing it, I'm friggin losing it," White Godzilla-Lincoln said under his breath. Suddenly a big robotic Jet Jaguar like version of Lisa flew from the sky and landed next to him.
"Then I'm afraid you'll need to "not" lose it, regain your composure and assist in trying to win this horrendous excess we call a "giant kaiju fight," Lisa-Jet Jaguar grumbled in a metallic robotic voice, before a stray missile flew right into her face, knocking off her metallic classes. She gave a deathly intense enraged look towards female Lincoln MechaGodzilla.
"...your CHROME DERRIERE IS MINE YOU DERIVATIVE KNOCK-OFF!" Lisa-Jet Jaguar yelled, flying full speed into the ever-increasingly intense fight of tooth, claw and lasers. A laser and a whole chunk of a building came flying erratically in White Godzilla-Lincoln's direction. He stood shocked, unable to move before a black flash and purple lasers shot at and pulverized the debris and lasers.
He turned and saw a blonde-haired, blue streak Battra-like anthropomorphic version of Sam. She came over and hovered above him.
"Is she okay?" She asked, looking over at the battle as Mothra-Luna picked Leni-Titanosaurus up by her tail and slammed her back, dropping a huge coat of sparkling purplish dust particles all over.
"She's...over there," Godzilla-Lincoln said, his eyes wide open, still completely baffled as to what was happening.
"Thank you," she said with a wink before flying next to Mothra-Luna and helping the others.
"What the heck is next?" Godzilla Lincoln complained, before several round bluish rings billowed from his right; it was a little Lily-Godzilla blowing smoke rings and waddling over to the melee, before a huge set of vines held her back. Godzilla Lincoln looked behind him and saw a gigantic version of his mother, Rita, in Biollante form, his father Lynn Sr. all decked out as the 1989 Godzilla, shorter than him but stockier and more muscular.
"Nope, you're not old enough yet sweetie," Rita-Biollante cooed.
"Ahhhhhhhhhh, but mooooooooooooooooooom, come on! That looks fun!" Lily-baby Godzilla whined.
"When you're older honey," Lynn Sr 89 Godzilla said, before they all left over a hill.
Godzilla-Lincoln's mouth dropped from the sites.
"Lemme guess, this isn't the end of it."
"Nope, not by a long shot kiddo!" An older voice said. White Lincoln-Godzilla looked behind and saw a 1954 Godzilla version of Pop Pop standing next to him.
"Pop pop?" Godzilla Lincoln called out.
"Heya sport! Gotta play grandpa and keep lil Lily occupied with some atomic breath fundamentals. Keep an eye out on that crazy bunch, will ya? They'll listen to you. Love ya kiddo!" 1954 Pop Pop said with a wink, nodding his head to the pile of fighting going on, before hurrying up after Baby Godzilla Lily, Biollante Rita and 89 Godzilla Lynn Sr.
White Godzilla-Lincoln just dug his tail to his side and scratched his cheek with a very confused look on his face.
"This is getting eerily like "Destroy All Monsters;" all it needs is...WHOOAAAAA!" White Godzilla-Lincoln roared out, diving to the ground as an enormous yellow-golden flash flew above him, heading for the huge monster melee pile. Wings even bigger than the fight itself flew out, wings like a demonic dragon-bat, rippling with electric current, shooting blasts of lightening and thunder around the engagement.
"WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!" Shouted the huge golden form in the dust, wings flapping the dust back; all the monsters froze. Looking down on every single one was a Lori-like Ghidorah, dwarfing any sibling-monster, her three heads laced with nothing but controlling rage and fury. The lightening from her wings rocked the ground, her roaring and wind gusts spreading all over and destroying a huge line of skycrapers in the far distance.
"Oh shit," the whole group of monsters said under their breath, except for Leni-Titanosaurus. Megaguiruis-Lola pulled off the metal device sticking out of her neck.
"Oh, thankies!" Leni-Titanosaurus said with a happy grin to Megaguiris-Lola, before Ghidorah-Lori let the entire group have an unbelievably colossal lightening shock, sending them all flying.
"HOLY SMOKES!" White Godzilla-Lincoln roared out in fear.
"I'M IN CHARGE NOW, I'M IN CONTROL, AND YOU DISTURBED MY BEAUTY SLEEP!" Ghidorah-Lori yelled out with all three of her heads, swinging one of her tails over and tossing Clyde-Anguirus into the pile of monsters she just manhandled.
"Sorry guys...ow," Clyde-Anguirus groaned, on his back as the others were hurting badly. Ghidorah-Lori started to prep another gigantic series of lightening strikes on the monsters; they were terrified and frozen, knowing the hell and pain about to be imparted on them.
White Godzilla-Lincoln felt a sudden bubble form in his abed stomach...rage, fury, protection. Luna-Mothra, Leni-Titanosaurus, Luan-Kong and Lynn-Rodan were the closest to Ghidorah-Lori's strike ability, and just as Ghidorah-Lori was about to unleash a barrage of deadly strikes, White Godzilla-Lincoln ran over as fast as he could in front of them, tanking a full blast direct hit from a million lightening-strikes face-first.
"LINCOLN!" They shouted, trying with all their might to reach him but the lightening and destruction blocking them from reaching him.
Minutes later, as Ghirdorah-Lori's cataclysmic attack ended, and the lightening and golden hue of death dissipated, they saw White-Godzilla-Lincoln, still holding his ground, scratched and charred but standing, and his dorsal plates lit up a pure brilliant blue, his eyes glowing a violent enraged furious flurry of whites and blues.
He let out a roar that echoed the landscape and caused landslides and damaged buildings and skyscrapers to collapse all around him and the other sibling and friend-monsters. They felt his power suddenly boil over.
And in that moment, right after the roar, White Godzilla-Lincoln shot a direct bluish-white atomic beam dead-on in Ghidorah-Lori's body, sending her crashing hundreds of miles backwards way across the distant horizon, still holding his atomic breath at full blast, destroying everything within miles of its blast. An unholy atomic cloud formed from the area Ghidorah-Lori crashed.
A small Muto version of Bobby suddenly flew by them.
"Sorry guys, it's her time of the month again, ahhaha," Muto Bobby said embarrassed, before zooming full speed for the atomic cloud, seemingly to control and comfort Ghidorah Lori, shouting back "SUPER SOOOOOOOORRY AGAIN! FREE CHURROS AT THE MARKET FOR EVERYBODY!" Bobby-Muto zoomed full speed to the atomic cloud, seemingly to control and comfort what would be a more pissed off than ever before Ghidorah Lori.
White Godzilla-Lincoln cut off his atomic breath and collapsed onto the ground with an enormous thud.
The scene got dark; nearly all the other monster sibling and friends dissipated from White Godzilla-Lincoln's field of vision...except for one that his vision could barely make out.
Luna-Mothra flew over to his side, followed by Lynn-Rodan.
"Our hero," Luna-Mothra cooed delicately as she snuggled up to him.
"You did it bro, you saved us all," Lynn-Rodan said happily as she nuzzled her beak into his chest.
"Awwwww, you saved us Godzilla-Lincy! Thank you thank you!" Leni-Titanosaurus said with a giggle as she plopped down and wrapped her body around his head to let him rest on her.
"You really do flame to please, ahahahahaha, get it?" Kong-Luan suddenly laughed as she dropped down by his legs. All four sister-kaiju surrounded him "That should knock her out for awhile, though I dunno if any amount of sleep's gonna golden her hue, hahaha."
"Ow, everything hurts," White Godzilla-Lincoln chuckled.
"We love you bro," Luna-Mothra said with a nurturing voice, all four of them leaning in, kissing his face all at once.
Meanwhile, Lynn was lost in her own epic escapade. Even though she was twirling on a boogie board, in her world she was riding a surf board-like cheese wheel through a megatsunami of milk, twisting and twirling in the waves through the Grand Canyon, spiraling and kicking random assortments of balls to and fro off the canyon walls, with a score board hovering next to her as the points amassed by the millions.
"GET SOME, FUCKIN GET SOME! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lynn roared out in confident joy, spinning on the balls of her feet, kicking footballs, soccer balls, swinging and hitting base balls, tennis balls and volley balls with her bare fists.
The milky tsunami swirled higher to her left and pulverized a gigantic skyscraper sized cheese roll tower, falling all over and around her as she surfed the cheesy destruction, her smile reaching across both sides of her face. She used several of the balls heading towards her to knock out several boulder-sized chunks of cheese floating towards her, causing them to gyrate and spin into the cliffs; that upped her score by a billion points each.
"Come on, COME ON, BRING IT ON!" She dared the cheesy destruction and milky megatsunami all over. The milky wave sweeped over several of the three-thousand foot canyons onto the plateaus.
"OH SHIT!" She cried out, her cheese wheel about to crash into a large pointed outcrop of sandstone sticking out in her direction. She jumped over to a random cheese wheel floating by, and saw her cheese wheel collide with the rocky outcrop, completely collapsing into a pile of powdery cheese and string cheese strands.
"Whoa, I almost died...COOOOOOOOOOOL!"
She looked way in her horizon; the milky megatsunami was surging over one of the lower canyons like the biggest waterfall of all time.
"...I'm about to go over a waterfall...sharp rocks at the bottm? Most likely...bring it on," Lynn whispered over-confidently and smugly, as she gripped her toes hard into the cheese, her fingers as well, kneeling down as a series of thousands of sports balls hovered in place above the colossal waterfall, ready to descend on her the moment she went over.
And then the moment.
With a huge wily smile plastered on her face, she went over, seeing the entire canyon all around her being surged by the milky megatsunami and cheese destruction.
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Lynn screamed as hard as her lungs could in overjoyed adrenaline as the balls above descended on her like missiles. They were moving so fast she had to use every reflex, every bit of speed and strength and endurance to kick, hit, twirl, bounce and ricochet every ball that came at her. Maintaining her stance, she got every single one, and for every ball after the last the score increased billions and billions, till now the digital readout was just infinitely rotating.
It suddenly said in an all too familiar white-haired teen's voice, "you're one ball short of eleventy-infinity Lynn! One more ball and you win the record score!"
A wooden bat that had red bioluminescent streaks formed in Lynn's hands. She grabbed it hard with a deviant smile, as she saw a moon-sized purple baseball descending fast from space.
"Think you can do it Lynn?" The young voice asked.
Lynn winked to the score board boastfully.
"Bring it...the FUCK on!" Lynn chortled in glee, as she got her stance, still falling off down the near-infinite height of another surging milky waterfall. The purplish moon-sized baseball seemed to growl and make a thunderous laugh at Lynn, as though defiant of her.
"Tiny puny little pipsqueak," it said in a raspy tone.
"Come closer you fucker, you're mine," Lynn growled back with absolute confidence; the purplish moon-sized baseball came at her and made a frownish look with its mountain chain on its face, barreling full speed at Lynn.
"LET'S DO THIS!" Lynn yelled as it moved a mile a second towards her, scorching the landscape all around it till it was within four seconds of hitting Lynn.
With her tongue sticking out, cocky expression on her face, confidence oozing out by the gallons, she swung.
Her swing sounded like entire suspension bridge snapped and fell with dozens of ten thousand megaton nukes going off simultaneously. The land warped, the milk and cheese boiled away, all while the swing met the purplish-moon's nose, causing the moon to give a raspy horrific roar in pain. A crack the size of the canyon Lynn was in formed from the moon's nose, circling the entire circumference in seconds.
"HE WILL BE MINE! HE WILL BE!" The moon boomed, before the cracks had red light pour out, and within an instant, the moon exploded into a fiery red array, trillions of pieces and chunks flying all over in an astronomical explosion that mostly went back out into space.
"...never," Lynn mumbled, breathing heavily, her throat and body so very sore. She fell backwards on her cheese wheel, which somehow managed to survive, which was still in free-fall motion.
So was the scoreboard.
"Eleventy-infinity...I did it," Lynn weakly said as she found herself passing out onto the still falling cheese wheel.
"I got you," a voice called out from above. Lynn opened her eyes and saw a form, cloaked in her squinty vision a whitish aura with wings and what seemed like bunny ears descending on her. It scooped her up and flew up high in the air above the canyon.
"How...how'd I do?" Lynn asked weakly.
"You did it, you got the highest score ever for all time, eleventy-infinity...and you get your prize," the form said back to her in a familiar teen voice.
"My prize?"
"All yours...no one else's Lynn."
"...you're my prize? You...who I think you are...please...please... be who I think you are?" Lynn pleaded lowly, as she tried to focus on her vision.
Then the form kissed her deeply as it carried her along. She felt her tongue caress a chipped tooth.
"My...my prize," Lynn giggled, "I, I love you...Lincoln."
"I love you too Lynn."
Her version became clear; it was him, and she felt herself blush so hard her body glowed a rosy red; her whole body began glowing an array of reds.
"It suits you," this flying Lincoln chuckled as Lynn's rosy red aura meshed with his white aura, forming a flowing slurry of pinks, reds and whites.
"Shut up nerd," she cooed before pulling him back in and kissing deeply as the clouds above yielded to the color-show patterns of their passions.
Lincoln opened his eyes, his surroundings coming back in full force.
"Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, that was...whoaaa," Lincoln groaned, seeing his room, his laptop powered off. He felt his face, checking his mouth for jagged teeth. He traced his face for any dragon-like features, pointed ears, feeling his butt for a tail, his back for dorsal plates. Nothing there.
"That has got to be the single most wacked-out Godzilla dream I've ever head, especially with all my friends and family being in there like they were," Lincoln groaned, his head feeling like a trillion sensations, mostly fuzzy though.
He got out of bed, his feet not feeling the ground.
"Good lordie I'm still hovering, I'm friggin hovering like there's no ground under me, gosh what a sensation," Lincoln giggled nervously as he dug his feet into the carpet. He reached for a pair of socks Lynn bought him, black and orange ones with orange patterns along the toes and ball, and slipped them on. They were the thin breathable ones.
"Nope...nothin, still feels like I'm just hovering."
He took a step, his body motion feeling like it was a water jug packed with gold fish.
"Oh god this feels weeeeeeeiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrird. I need...I dunno what I need, but I...I'm pretty sure I need Luna. This is fu...fu...what's that word again?"
Lincoln took one delicate step at a time, his body acting like it was about to keel over any second. Several tenuous steps later he was out his door and in the hallway. It looked like the red carpet went on forever as his depth perception made the room twirl all around like a fun-house.
"Okay Lincoln, easy bud, just stay on your feet...you can do this, you can...uuugh," Lincoln said, seeing the red carpet shrink back from the edges of the wall as thin as a gymnastic balance beam.
"Oh god damn it!" He growled, wiggling his body and toes so he didn't fall off as he flailed his arms; they felt as weak and flabby as gelatin.
"Oof, you got it man...you...you got it...you got it...hoooooly crud," Lincoln stuttered in terror as the sides of the thinned out carpet's edges turned into an endless dark pit.
Lincoln began sweating, his body quivering in terror from what felt like a tightrope walk across this vast gulf along a three-inch wide red carpet.
"I can do it...I can do it...Luna's over there...oh shit," Lincoln whispered in sheer horror as he felt his body rocking back and forth from what felt like a gust of winds coming from behind him.
"OH SHIT I CAN'T DO IT, I CAN'T DO IT!" Lincoln screamed, his eyes tearing up as he felt like any second his socked toes and feet would lose their grip.
"DANG IT, I'M SCREWED!" Lincoln cried out as he felt his body wobble too much to the right. Winds were beginning to bombard him furiously. The pit became even darker and more endless.
He couldn't help but look behind him; it was a colossal tornado of biblical proportions, miles upon miles wide, in the near distance heading right towards him.
"...I'm fucked," Lincoln cried out with a crack in his voice, frozen in place. He closed his eyes as he felt a blast of wind from the never-ending tornado strike him. He closed his eyes, tears of terror pouring out as he felt himself fall off the carpet, his body balling up.
"Gotcha!" A voiced called out. Lincoln felt himself caught by someone.
He opened his eyes and saw Lynn's smirking face. She was holding him bridal style. He took a moment to digest what was going on.
Everything was normal, the hallway, the carpet, all the doors, nothing was what it looked like minutes ago.
"Whoa dude, and I thought I was tripping," Lynn giggled, using her leg to twirl Lincoln around. She used a free arm to close her door.
"Lynn...is that you?"
"Last time I checked doofus, what were you-"
Lincoln hugged Lynn so tight it caught her off guard.
"Oh my god THANK YOU Lynn! I was about to...fall off in a crevice?" He said as he stammered, questioning his explanation.
"Dude, is that why you were like, lookin like you were standing on a balance beam?"
"Yea...yeah...holy crap that was a messed up hallucination, I thought I was about to die. You...ya saved me though."
"Hehehehe, I do that a lot, don't I," Lynn smugly said with a wink. Lincoln took a second to inspect Lynn, and something was, off to say the least.
She looked sweatier than usual, and she was only wearing really skimpy under-armor shorts and a bra.
"Uuuuuuuuuuuh," Lincoln grumbled, his eye twitching from how uncontrollable his hormones got from seeing Lynn look like this. Her hair was no longer in a ponytail but free and flowing, and was rather shiny.
"Lynn? You umm...ya know you're in nothing but your shorts and bra, right?"
"...shut up," Lynn mumbled as she found herself frowning and blushing, turning around full-speed and running right into her door.
"Damn it! OW!" Lynn yelled, as Lincoln couldn't help but laugh from that. Lynn tried getting angry, but as she frowned, she couldn't help but start laughing hard too. She fell on her butt next to Lincoln as they both lost it laughing.
They laughed for what felt like hours when it was just at most a dozen seconds.
Lincoln keeled over on his hands and knees, trying to pull Lynn up though he was still teary-eyed from laughing hysterically.
"Brooooooooo, oh broooooooooooooo," a sing-song voiced called out, Lincoln quickly turning around to see it was Luna calling out to him like she was looking for him. She looked high beyond belief, now wearing a half ripped t shirt with McSwagger on the front, and similar looking underarmour shorts as Lynn, even though it looked like it was stretched beyond its limits. Why she was in different clothing Lincoln didn't know.
"Luna? Over...ehehehhe, over here," Lincoln giggled, him and Lynn were still trying to control themselves.
Lynn managed to use a push-up position to push her back up again, still laughing her butt off.
Luna still seemed to be looking for Lincoln even though she was just down the hallway; she looked like she was looking in a maze for him. Lynn pulled Lincoln up slowly, but couldn't help but notice Luna bending over calling out for Lincoln under the red hallway carpet. Her colossal derriere was wobbling and on show, and Lynn couldn't stop herself from staring straight at it.
"Hoooooly...heck that's a big butt," Lynn said as quietly as she could, still laughing, blushing even more as the thought of slapping Luna's ass surged her mind.
Lynn suddenly dropped Lincoln, falling hard on his butt as she zoomed to her room and came back out with two basketballs. She walked over slowly as she pushed them together and held them next to Luna's posterior.
"NO WAY!" Lynn mouthed, seeing her ass was much wider than the two basket balls together. Lynn looked over to Lincoln, nodding for him to come over.
"Duuuuuuude, you gotta see this! Look!" Lynn harshly whispered in her giggles. Lincoln covered his mouth as he tried with all his might to not blurt out laughing.
"Ohhhhhhhhh Lincoooooooooln, my little brotatoooooooo," Luna cooed out in a song. Lincoln was right behind her with Lynn, still holding the basketballs as they both kept trying to control their laughter.
Suddenly Luna backed up fast, her ass knocking both Lincoln and Lynn backwards, as she herself lost her footing, twirling in a circle as she fell backwards, her ass landing in both Lincoln and Lynn's face.
"Whoa dude! Who'd I bumper car this time?" Luna called out, her eyes twacked out, her body wobbling. She looked down, seeing the bodies of Lincoln and Lynn under her.
"Pfffffffffffffffffftttttt, AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAA!" Luna roared out, rolling on her side to let them up as they too were cracking up. All three were now hysterically breaking up, out of control, tears rolling out as their bodies were getting red, flushed, tears of joviality streaming out.
"BROOOOOO, YA GOTTA WATCH OUT FOR ME ASS MATE! AHAHAHAH!"
"AHAHAHAHAHAH! HOW CAN HE LUNA? YOUR MOON IS BIGGER THAN THE MOON, AHAHAHAHHAHA!" Lynn cried out chuckling.
"AT LEAST IT GOT A MOON AHAHAAH!"
"AHAHAHAHAAHA!" Lincoln cried out, before he mumbled, "but, but...butt, get it? HAHAHAHAHAH! But...Lynn's got an ass too, see?" Lincoln said as she turned Lynn around. "Right there, there's her ass! aAHHAHAHAHAHHAA!"
Lynn couldn't help but laugh hard and wiggle her butt around. Luna giggled as she leaned down to look at it.
"Heheheheh, tiny but perky, and ooooh? Pretty damn muscular and round too! Looks like you've been doing squats more there sporty?"
"Yeah, see?" Lynn giggled as she slipped down her back underarmour underwear, showing her cheeks to Luna, round and perky, freckled, muscular and toned extremely well but with a rather noticeable bounce to them too.
"Hehehheheheheheheheh, like mine but miniature, ehehehehe," Luna mumbled as she felt a sudden urge to do something.
"Lynn! Put those away you knucklehead," Lincoln blurted out with a laugh, before Lynn gave a wicked smirk. She twirled around and showed her ass to Lincoln as he froze in place.
"Awww, come on Linc, we just kissed Luna's ass, sure ya can't kiss mine? Heheheheh."
"I volunteer," Luna said, giggling as she leaned down and gave a powerful kiss to Lynn's left cheek, letting her huge tongue droop out and caress a good chunk of it. Lynn and Luna laughed hard as Lincoln blushed crimson red. He then gave a wily smile, leaned down and gave Lynn's right cheek a very long lick and a tiny nibble. Lynn screeched as Luna gave a wink and a nod.
"Cheeky bastard," Luna said giving him a thumbs up, before Lynn quickly pulled her underarmour up, "duuuude, you got some balls on ya, I'll give you that."
"You think he's got cojones Lynnsanity, he's got an even bigger dick," Luna mumbled under her breath.
"I know," Lynn replied, Lynn and Luna now falling backwards into the wall as they laughed harder than ever before. Lincoln was still giggling before that registered in his mind, and then he froze in place, his eyes bulging out.
"Holy crap these drugs are NOT good, they're making me...making us all flirty as heck," Lincoln thought as he tried to reign in his actions and mind. He was suddenly twirled around as both Lynn and Luna each gave him a kiss on his cheeks.
"Now we're even," Luna and Lynn said in unison, both laughing as Lincoln was now trying to grapple his laughing fit and come back to reality.
"Ha ha ha, very funny, let's...let's...those brownies are kicking our butts right now guys."
"Can't be worse than it kissing our butts, HA!" Lynn blurted, Luna high-fiveing her, saying, "nice."
"Ha ha, but seriously, we were...da fuck were we doing?"
Luna and Lynn looked at each other confused.
"Got no blimey idea bro."
"Me neither...and what were we laughing about again?" Lynn asked, still having mini giggle fits that infected Lincoln and Luna.
"I...I don't know, I can't remember," Lincoln snickered, shaking his head, trying with all his will to remember. Nothing.
"Fuck me we're fucked, ahahahaha!" Luna blurted out as she wobbled back up.
"Is that a request?" Lynn replied back with a devlish smirk.
"You couldn't handle all this," Luna said with her own grin, wobbling her huge ass around in front of Lynn. Lynn felt her smile saturate with saliva from the sight, suddenly pulling Luna's arms behind her back and slamming her groin into Luna's backside. Luna's eyes went wide for a second, before she sneered back.
"Pfft, ya barely made my ass wobble," Luna said, winking at Lynn before Lynn, sticking her tongue out determined, suddenly slammed several times as hard as her drugged out shaky body could muster, making Luna's ass and body wobble hard.
Lincoln just froze, petrified from the sites, as a huge surge of blood shot from his nose.
"Hehehehe, there ya go, that's how you pound a big ass...your turn," Luna cooed as she surprised Lynn with an unusual amount of speed, grabbing Lynn's waist and slamming her own groin into Lynn's body several times in humping motion, suddenly picking Lynn up off the ground.
"As if, good luck rocker," Lynn cooed in an unimpressed tone, before Luna gave her own determined, defiant look, and suddenly tossed Lynn up and down her groin like she was a rag doll, surprising Lynn and making her squeak several times.
Lincoln had several cartoonishly huge, Clyde-like blasts of blood shoot all over the red carpet.
"Hehehe, think we got bro riled up?" Lynn said in a goofy lustful grin.
"Teeheee, I think Lincoln wants a turn," Luna growled sensually, Luna letting Lynn go as both devilishly tip toed to Lincoln. Lincoln felt like a baby deer in a den of Lions...and couldn't help but feel so turned on.
"Awwwwwww, look at him, you can see his shorts gettin tighter...he soooo wants it," Lynn said.
Lincoln felt his hormones raging and ready for anything, but in the one functional faculty of his mind he tried to come up with something to stop what was about to happen. His mind worked overtime in microseconds, planning and processing what he could say to delay what was about to happened...not that he felt he didn't want this, but that this was going down a possible road of no return.
"LUNA! Ya...you made any good songs lately?" Lincoln yelled out in a blurted question.
"Hmmmmmm...ya know, I think your big sis did think of some songs while I was gone," Luna hummed. "I think about...sixety-nine songs I think?"
Luna looked at her hand; a really squiggly "69" was written, with a huge permanent marker. She kept looking on her body; one 69 was on her other hand, then, thinking really hard, remembered something.
"I, I think I wrote that number soooo many times on me so I wouldn't forget, but, yeaaaaaaaaaah, I came up with sixty-nine new songs maties, ehehehehe," Luna boasted, Lynn looking impressed, almost mock-swooning Luna.
"Way to go rocker-chick! We gotta hear you jam those out sometime," Lynn giggled with a blush, Lincoln following in suite.
"Yeah, I wrote it all down and recorded the mock-melodies for dem all. This brownie shit is a fuckin explosion of inspiration. Although...some classics ya can't beat," Luna said with a devious, devilishly playful grin towards Lincoln, then to Lynn. Lynn blushed and gave a retaliatory "bring it" look.
"Uh oh, the hell's goin down now?" Lincoln thought, feeling his hormones detect something else bubble up in this situation.
Luna suddenly pulled Lynn over and whispered in her ear, "play along with me, gonna screw with bro big time."
"Hehehehe, any chance to screw with him, ahahahahhah!" Lynn said, both now in this nefarious field, Lincoln both dreading yet totally turned on by what was possibly going to happen.
And then Luna hummed a little tune and did a little beat boxing, before she lusciously sung, "This was never the way I planned, not my intention. I got so brave, drink in hand, lost my discretion. It's not what, I'm used to just wanna try you on-"
"Lu...Luna?" Lincoln mumbled, another surge of blood about to almost cause him to pass out. Lynn was just swaying to the beat, not conscious to the lyrics.
"I'm curious, for you," Luna sang directly at Lynn now, Lynn looking in Luna's eyes now before she caught wind of Luna moving closer and closer to her face, eyes widening as her went limp in excitement for a moment.
"Caught, MY ATTENTION!" Luna sung loudly before she swept Lynn off her feet and pulled her back, locking her lips with Lynn's, letting her huge tongue reach down into Lynn's mouth into her throat. Lynn moaned so utterly submissively as her eyes bulged, her breath frozen, her body red as crimson fire, and Lincoln squeaking from the sights, slamming backwards into the wall, his shorts feeling tighter than they have in a very long time; he felt himself pre-jizz all over.
"HOLY SHIT!" Lincoln cried out, unable to believe what he just saw as Luna bear-mauled Lynn, pulled her tongue out of Lynn as their saliva was dripping off each other's tongues and mouths, a huge amount of saliva, and she sang full blast, "I kissed a girl and I liked it, the taste of her cherry chap stick!"
She reached down to plant another kiss on Lynn, then kept going on, "I kissed a girl just to try it, I hope my boyfriend don't mind it," Lynn's head falling into Luna's bust as Luna winked at a moritifed and severely aroused Lincoln; he knew he failed and was now just riding what seemed like an endless roller coaster of tempting the laws of providence.
"It felt so wrong, it felt so right, don't mean I'm in love tonight," Luna continued, before Lynn cracked her neck, got an arm free and pulled Luna's head down, force-making out with her this time, then her finishing the lyrics, "I kissed a girl and I liked it," before Luna made a huge grin with Lynn, both finishing off with, "I liked it."
Both fell on the ground laughing more uncontrollably then ever before as they saw Lincoln squirm, his fingers nearly digging through the drywall of the walls around them; he looked like he was trying to hold himself back.
"Is...is it over?" Lincoln weakly called out, nervously laughing while a single strand of blood dribbled out of his nose, before a huge surge swooshed out onto the red carpet.
"HAHAHAHAHHA, bloody hell mate, literally," Luna laughed, her and Lynn high-fiving now, "I think we really fucked with him," Luna laughed.
"Yeah, we totally fucked him," Lynn said with a smirk, Luna keeling over laughing, seeing what Lynn unintentionally said.
"Yeah yeah, whatever guys, now let's figure out...oh dang it I'm like, waaaaaaaay light headed," Lincoln moaned as he wiped away the blood on his face.
"Yeesh, we really caused brotato to pop a vessel, eheheheheh," Lynn giggled, wiping her and Luna's saliva still on her chin, Luna doing the same.
"Say...what did we just do?" Lynn asked, "these drug brownies are like, giving me the memory of a dead fish."
"Yeaaaaaaah, same here...literally just forgot what we did like five seconds ago...taste like I made out with someone," Luna said, tasting her lips. While dabbing her lips she saw Lincoln struggling to cover his nose.
"Yo, Lynnsanity, take care of bro will ya? You're good at taking care of nose bleeds and such, k?"
"K rocky-Lunboa, ehehehehe."
"Dude, that's so bad Luan would have come up with that, eheheheh."
"She did," Lynn giggled.
"Figures, ehehehe, and bro? Once Lynn's all done with ya...I need to show ya privately all "69" songs I came up with; I'll be waiting bro toes potatoes, all cleaaaaaaaaaaaaned up and ready," Luna giggled with a sing-song tune, barely able to plant herself on her shaky legs and meander to her room and shutting the door.
Lincoln could tell from the way she said "69" and "all cleaned up and ready" that she was thinking of something else...something more sensual.
"Jesus, at this rate I might loose it so bad I may actually fuck her," Lincoln groaned under his breath.
"The fuck ya say dude?" Lynn asked with an goofy grin and eyebrow out, like she heard something. Lincoln froze like petrified wood.
"Fuck someone? Dude, your girl around or somethin?" Lynn smirked.
"NO...No! I...I...I-"
"Pfft, dork, chill bro, she can get a piece of your huge cock later, eheheheh," Lynn sneared as she rolled her eyes, Lincoln's nose spurting a little more blood on his arm.
"Yeesh dude, if this is what you're like with a nose bleed, I'd hate to think what you jizzing in your girl's mouth might be like for her," Lynn floated out absentmindedly, turning her head forwards and remembering what Lincoln tasted like that night in the bathroom; she slithered her tongue out in the yummy thoughts and butterflies from how hot it was to her. Lincoln didn't seem to hear her cause he was mumbling under his breath "stupid friggin nose."
"Oof, thank god he didn't hear me...wonder if he would get hornier if I said that to his face," Lynn thought.
As Lynn had Lincoln stand by the sink as she tilted his head back to hold off the blood going down his nose, she grabbed a few hand towels to wipe the blood off his arms and face. Funny enough not a drop got on his shirt.
"Oops, hold up," Lynn mumbled, spitting in the hand towel and wiping a patch of semi dried blood on the tip of his nose.
"Yuck," Lincoln mumbled.
"Suck it up dude."
"Yeesh, this day, huh Lynn?"
"Huge cheese wheels chasing us, sewer rides through groddy sewage and milk, sneaking into my high school after it's out and almost getting caught showering with your sis, faking out my roller derby buddies that you're my cousin, and now all fucked up on dope brownies a la Luan and Luna? Pretty normal day if ya ask me dude, eheheh," Lynn chuckled, now getting his cheek.
"Yeah...weird...weird hallucinations...say Lynn? Isn't all that a little too crazy?"
"Pfft, it's all crazy, it's a crazy world, so ya gotta roll with the punches, and punch back harder till the world knows you're the winner, why?"
"Well...I think I sorta met God."
"Pfffffffffffffffffft, yeeeeeeeah right dude! AHHAHA!"
"Lynn, it was, like, suuuuuuuuuuper trippy. It was...I dunno."
"Spill the beans Linc, what's up?"
"Well, it was like, when I met our God, it was like...he summed our entire world as nothing more than a fanfiction."
"Fanfiction? Ain't that the shit that Lucy reads secretly at night? For that Princess Pony junk?"
"Yeah. So this god is like this average adult guy, mid-twenties, and everything we know, what we do, did and will do and go through...he's writing it. It's like, you think you got free will, but it's really him writing us, so we don't actually have free will. It's all super confusing. But yeah, I met our God cause...well, he said that he doesn't know the next layer of his universe, if they got a God or not."
Lynn just looked at him like he was completely looney.
"Yeah, I know, it's wacky."
"Wacky? Geez Lincoln, that's what I call one fucked up trip. And really dumb, ahahahahah! Ya must have been reading some fanfic or thought about it, and hallucinated about it. I mean shit, I've been losing it too...I think, though I'm pretty sure I got an awesome eleventy-infinity score somewhere."
"Eleventy-infinity what?"
"Never mind. But seriously, that's a goofy idea dude."
"Ya think so? It's like, all this crazy intense stuff, all the drama and tragedy, it sorta makes sense."
"Yeaaaaaaaaaaaah, but Trump being president was once a joke in a cartoon, and now?" Lynn asked in a leading tone.
"Yeah, I get ya, maybe I'm just...all more fucked up than I thought."
"Nah, you're good dude, just them brownies Luan scored. They're pretty good ahahahahhhaha!"
"Maybe I shouldn't think on it too much."
"There ya go! Cause seriously? It's friggin stupid that everything we know and are is a fanfiction, aHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Ya think?"
"I mean, come on, what kind of a loser do you gotta be to write about us?"
"He said we're based off a cartoon, so we're just one variation of thousands, if not endless versions of our universe."
"Like that Rick and Morty cartoon? I love that show, Rick's kick-ass!"
"I guess, I never got into it honestly."
"Ah man, really? We gotta binge the whole show together sometime Linc."
"I tried the first episode, and saw that butter robot opening of one...I dunno, it's funny but...it's really depressing too. Like, when I met that God in my dream, it was like, all the things I'm doing and have done, how much can I own up to that? Is it all me? It just sorta messed with me. And...well, maybe nothing really matters...we're all just specs on a computer, here one moment...gone the next," Lincoln said with a deflated, somewhat saddened tone as he looked down towards his feet.
Lynn pulled his chin up and looked in his eyes with a supportive, nurturing smile.
"Well, if that's really the case and we're nothin but letters and pixels on some asshole's computer or whatever, this pixel matters to me a lot," Lynn cooed, hugging Lincoln tight as Lincoln felt his heart flutter, utterly speechless from how sweet Lynn just got.
"Thankies Lynn."
"All better? And tell anyone about my sweet side and I'll kick your ass straight into Mr. Grouse's upstairs window from here," Lynn winked. Lincoln laughed as he held onto Lynn tightly, his legs becoming jelly without his knowing.
"And besides, why would that God ya think you met be writing about us anyways?"
"For a bunch of people, he enjoys it a lot and so do quite a few other people online in his world."
"Yeesh, what a bunch of dorks, hahahahhahaha! Ya think they'd get a job or join a sport, not stay locked up in their rooms all day jerking off to porn and shit, aHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!"
"Ah come on, that's a bit of a generalization, don't ya think Lynn?"
"Ah who cares? It's not like it's true, eehehhehe. And if it is, so what?" Lynn growled with a smirk, suddenly flipping off in the air.
"HAAHaHAHAH! Try and stop me you asshole! Fuck you! Suck my dick! Suck my dick, and suck my bro's huge dick! AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!"
Lincoln couldn't help but laugh a little, Lynn grinning like she won the contest with the air and the universe.
"See? We're good nerd. Now, up on your feet...and fuck I can't remember what the hell we were suppose to do," Lynn said, wondering what they were about to do.
"I have no clue, but I'm starting to see...lots of you Lynn," Lincoln said, his vision suddenly producing six Lynns side by side, all talking in unison.
Lynn chuckled as Lincoln tried reaching out for one of the Lynns; he missed by several feet.
"Over here doofus," Lynn said, reaching out for Lincoln, but suddenly was seeing a bunch of Lincoln's too, padding her hand in the air near his head.
"Oh damn it, now I'm seeing a ton of ya dork."
"So how much longer do you think we'll be out of it?" Lincoln asked, wobbling on his legs.
"Beats me Lincoln. It's...not soo bad actually," Lynn said, suddenly trailing off, feeling her body get super weak. Her head felt light, specks of stars in her line of sight, and wobbled like a spin top.
"Oof, think I overdid it back there dude, ehehehhe, I'm...goin doooooown," Lynn mumbled, Lincoln lunging over to catch her before her head slammed the bathroom floor. He slammed his back instead and let Lynn's head fall on his stomach.
"Nice reflexes bro, and soooooorry, ahahahahahah!"
"Let's take a minute," Lincoln winced in pain, laughing more from the pain than groaning.
"Yeaaaaaaaaaah...let's," Lynn trailed off, feeling her cheek caressed on Lincoln's abbed stomach.
"Mmmmmmmmmm...comfy," Lynn giggled internally. She was faced away Lincoln's stare. She couldn't help but smile being snuggled like this with him, even if it was on the bathroom floor of all places, though some of the memories from when they were both in it rushed her.
"Heheheh, I think that's where Lincoln's cum made me slip, ahahaahah!" She uttered under her breath, looking by the pattern near Lincoln's feet. She couldn't help at notice how close she was to his groin.
Her eyes widened when she saw Lincoln's junk was visibly on full blast, though it seemed like he wasn't totally conscious of it.
"Gosh, I wonder how that would feel in me," Lynn squealed in her mind, trying to imagine how she'd fit herself on him. She watched plenty of porn of big guys smashing smaller women, but the videos versus real life, that was a challenge she was always wanting to try, especially since she knew how tight she was down there.
"Mmmmm...is he out of it?" Lynn wondered, looking quickly to Lincoln; his mouth was gurgling spit as he seemed passed out.
Her eyes widened. She stretched her leg and used her toes to close the bathroom door, locking the lock on it.
Her breathing intensified, her drooling increasing, body flushed red. She slowly inched an arm to slowly inch down Lincoln's shorts, going millimeter by millimeter to see if any of the motion would wake Lincoln up from his passing out.
As she got to the shaft and caressed the thickness at the beginning, she felt her womanhood quiver violently.
"Lincoln's junk...oh my god it feels sooooo muscular...so...so...so," Lynn trailed off, suddenly feeling utterly gross.
"This...this isn't right. Not...not like this," Lynn grumbled remorsefully.
"It was one thing when he was pounding my throat...this...is a whole other," Lynn concluded, pulling her hand out slowly as she put her face in her hand.
"I'd be knowingly taking advantage of Lincoln while he wasn't conscious...god, I might be monstrous perv, but...I don't wanna be a monster."
Lynn shuttered as she felt a wave of shame from how tempted she felt to go down on Lincoln right then and there. She felt like even if she had these intense lusting feelings for Lincoln, she couldn't just do that to him, not in his sleep.
"God, talk about a mood killer," she nervously chuckled under her breath, laying her head on Lincoln's belly button and looking up at the ceiling; it was morphing into a slew of trippy colors and shapes, though this didn't seem to phase her at all. She turned to Lincoln and gave a deep, heavy stare to his face.
"Even when I'm tripping my balls off dude, you still keep me grounded doofus...I...I love you Lincoln...so much," Lynn uttered so quietly under her breath, before giving his tummy a quick kiss. She stretched her arms and legs out and snuggled his side, Lincoln slightly snoring away.
"Heheh...doofus."
Lynn looked at a clock on the wall ticking away. Barely an hour passed since they got home.
"What a day...with bro..."
The bathroom door suddenly slammed right open. Lynn and Lincoln were jolted up by the crashing sound and all sorts of chaotic sounding honks and an assortment of crazy cartoony sound effects.
Both were utterly speechless.
"Hooooooooooooooly shit," both groaned in unison. Right in front of them was the busty clown-costume wearing, unicycle-riding, confetti and balloon- animal making, horn honking and goofy-laughing older sibling with a toothy grin cheek to cheek, eyes laced with carny mania and chaos.
"Luan?" Lynn asked in a bit of fear.
Luan, are...is that you?"
"Hahahahah, just me plunging into action! AAHAHAH, GET IT?"
"Uh oh, what now?" Lincoln dreaded, now wide awake as Luan hovered around the entrance to the bathroom with a strange unpredictable look of mania and chaos in her eyes. A weird, ominously increasing sound of intense carnival like jazzy music suddenly was getting louder and louder behind Luan, before it came from all sides of the bathroom.
"Brace yourself dude, I see like seven Luans on a unicycle right now...I'm fuckin trippin my balls out...you...you're seeing this, right Linc? You're hearing that music?"
"You hear it too Lynn?"
"Holy fuck she's high! Like scary high!"
"Awwwwww, does someone have a sinking feeling?" Luan said with a mocking whiny tone, before throwing a whoopie cushion at a bewildered Lynn and a rubber chicken at Lincoln.
"I thought you'd be more wet to see me, eheheheheh. Don't go blasting air or choking your chicken yet folks! Now sit back, relaaaaaaaax like ya just had ex-lax, WAM HA! And take some pamphlets, "Luan giggled as she threw a few papers with crayon and marker writing to a perplexed and unsettled Lynn and Lincoln as she made herself sound like she was preparing for a musical number, "and prepare your minds for a deployment of my good ole fashion gauntlet of ultraviolet enjoyment, peppered with a pounding of poignant musical ballet! No need for valets, as I'll be your palette to the inlet of my wacky cassoulet, now prep yourselves ladies and toilets, I'm about to spoil it, this springlet is about to go from dribblet to dropping a mothafuckin mallet! Hope you enjoy this bit, cause I'm a about to drop a skillet on this fillet! HIT IT!"