When Natsu awoke, he needed to make a run for the toilet immediately. He barely made it there before puking.
Going through his morning routine proved to be difficult as his body wouldn't stop trembling. It took him twice as long to take a shower, but at least that left him enough time to come up with a plan for the day.
Since the theory that having sex would prevent Gray's death wasn't correct, it would be advisable to figure out what else 'forming a bond' could mean, just like Gray suggested. Natsu was sure that if he threw the question to everybody around, then he'd probably only receive one or two different answers and a big discussion afterwards, so it would be better to ask everyone privately.
He also needed to think of a good excuse to ask them such a question. Would it be odd if he said that he was just curious? Or better, he could say that he'd made a bet with Happy, that they guessed their answers and would get a point for each correct guess. Whoever won would have to do the winner a favor, no matter what it was. Yeah, that sounded great. The others would think that Happy was trying to get more fish out of Natsu, knowing full well that he wasn't as dumb as Natsu when it came to relationships and feelings, and that he could probably win easily.
And why only pretend? He could challenge Happy for real.
By the time he was fully dressed, Natsu was in high spirits again, his worries and nausea forgotten.
Happy liked the idea of the bet very much. He surely thought that his victory was guaranteed, and he was probably right. With a huge grin on his face, he listened to Natsu's guesses.
The question they agreed upon was the following: 'What do you consider a strong bond between lovers?'
"Hmmm, let's see. Gajeel will probably say 'eating iron created by Levy'. Erza... 'eating strawberry cake'? Lucy will probably say 'spend a romantic evening together where one reads out a book to the other'. Or better yet, a candlelight dinner!"
"You have to decide on one."
"Then I'll take the candlelight dinner for Lucy. Wendy... probably a kiss."
Natsu knew that he was probably far off, and the confident grin on Happy's face as he listened to the rest of his guesses didn't do much to shatter that idea. Natsu purposely omitted Gray until the very end, as Gray was the only one he didn't want to be wrong about, and yet he had no clue what it could be. What would come to Gray's mind first when he asked for a 'strong bond between lovers'?
Natsu was disappointed in himself that even though they'd confessed so many times and gotten intimate already, he didn't know what Gray's heart truly desired, other than being close to the one he loved. He'd been talking about a life together with Natsu and Happy, so it had to be that, right?
"Gray will probably say 'moving in together'."
Happy nodded. His announcement that he thought everybody would say 'marriage' staggered Natsu. The option of marriage hadn't even crossed his mind.
Natsu nearly stumbled over his feet when the realization of what this theory would entail sunk in. Marry Gray? How the hell was he supposed to realize that? He had a timespan of exactly twelve hours until Gray lost his memories again. How the fuck was he supposed to go from being rivals to getting married within twelve hours?
More importantly, was Natsu even ready for such a thing? If by some miracle he managed to get Gray to marry him, and the marriage ended up saving Gray's life, would Natsu be ready to lead a life as Gray's husband? He'd never seriously thought about getting married. He was still nineteen, for god's sake! People didn't think about marriage at such a young age, did they?
However, Natsu was sure of one thing: He wanted to spend his life with Gray by his side, and nobody else. Then what harm could a marriage do? A ceremony and a formal recognition of the fact that they belonged to each other wouldn't change their feelings, after all.
"Natsu? Everything alright? Worried that you'll lose?"
"No way! Let's do this!"
It turned out that Happy's guess had been a very clever one, since he got almost fifty percent—mostly because of the girls—right, which earned him a decisive victory. The only time Natsu guessed accurately was when Erza answered that 'eating a strawberry cake together' was the first thing that came to her mind.
The only one Natsu hadn't asked yet was Gray, who was still unaware of what was going on around him. Natsu had kept the whole thing as subtle as possible, keeping his voice low and such. Truth be told, he was anxious. Because whatever Gray would answer, Natsu was almost a hundred percent sure that he was going to be determined to make it happen.
So, when he flopped down opposite of Gray, he tried real hard to keep his nervousness in check. Gray eyed him warily through many seconds of tense silence. Finally, he averted his gaze and resumed playing with his glass of water.
Natsu cleared his throat. "I have a bet with Happy. We guessed the answers of all our friends to a certain question, and the one whose guesses turn out to be more accurate wins."
Gray lifted his eyebrows. "Oh? Let's hear it then."
"What do you consider a strong bond... between lovers?"
"What kind of dumb question is that? The strongest bond between lovers is obviously marriage."
Natsu just gaped at Gray, unable to process the answer. He ignored Happy's wide grin in favor of dwelling on his spinning thoughts.
'Dumb... Obviously... Is he ready to get married? Has he thought about it?'
His curiosity got the better of him, and before he could think about his wording, he blurted out, "Do you want to get married?"
Gray jumped to his feet, letting out a startled "what the hell?" and staring at Natsu with his mouth wide open.
Why did he react that harshly when all Natsu wanted to know was if Gray would want to get married someday? Gray had been the one to bring up marriage in the first place, so why was he so shocked when being asked another question on the topic?
Happy shoved Natsu's arm and regarded him with a suggestive wink. "You're not wasting time, are you? Well, good luck." With that, he flew off towards the bar, where a red-faced Wendy was trying to distract Carla and Mirajane.
What had he done wrong? Gray was clearly expecting an answer, but what should he say?
'I only asked him if he wants to get married. I mentioned neither a time nor a partner, so why is he freaking out? Unless... wait. WAIT. Oh shit. Oh my god. No, no, nonono!'
Had he just accidentally proposed to Gray? This couldn't be true!
However, on second thought, there was nothing wrong with marrying Gray. After they spent some years in a stable relationship and both wanted to take things to the next level.
'Shit. What should I do?'
Gray still stood there, growing more and more baffled as the seconds ticked by. Looking around, Natsu noticed that they held the attention of nearly all their friends. As much as Natsu loved public displays of affection, and as much as he didn't mind letting their guild mates in on their relationship, this was off limits. So, he grabbed Gray's wrist and dragged him out of the guild, ignoring his protests.
They'd just closed the door when a furious Lucy walked up to them. "Which of you sneaked into my apartment while I was taking a shower? And what's the meaning of this?"
She raised the snippet for Natsu and Gray to see, and Natsu was startled when he recognized the text Gray had written on a torn-out piece of Natsu's diary the previous time. He would have to look into that, too, but right then with his mind already reeling he just wasn't capable of thinking about yet another issue.
"I'll explain everything later, I promise, so could you please give us some privacy right now?"
Lucy's eyes widened, but then she took in Natsu's hand around Gray's wrist, blushed, nodded, and entered the guild.
Gray shouted, "What the hell is this about? That was my handwriting, but I don't recall writing anything like that. And you're behaving strangely."
Natsu bit his lip. "Let's go somewhere more private. I'll explain."
Gray nodded, and Natsu let go of his hand, leading him to the backside of the guild hall.
His thoughts were in total disarray, and when he tried to figure out a way to explain the current situation to Gray without having to include the information of his death, he came up empty.
Plus, Gray should have all the details before he decided on something important like their wedding.
Natsu took a deep breath, mentally apologized to Gray for putting him through this yet again, and then told Gray everything, from the very beginning until the current day. It took him nearly an hour to explain the whole thing and answer Gray's questions. His nerves were raw by the end—the memories were just too painful. Gray holding him close during the last half was soothing, but it didn't make the pain go away completely.
"So... you want us to marry because you think that would prevent my death?"
"I'm... not sure about that, to be honest. I mean, I've never thought about getting married before today. It's a huge step, one I'd only be willing to take after years of being a couple. Well, under normal circumstances at least. If it can save your life, I'd do anything, including this. But we don't know if it can save you... it's just a guess."
Gray tightened his grip around Natsu and let some moments of silence pass by before he answered.
"I honestly don't know what to do. If the assumption turns out to be correct, then I'll live and we're married at the age of nineteen. I'm not sure what to think of that. If it turns out to be wrong, I'll die on the day we marry, everyone but you will forget it ever happened, and you'll probably go through much more pain than you already are."
Gray sighed, and then added in a much lower voice, "And I'm afraid you'll never want to get married again because you're traumatized..."
Natsu hadn't thought about any of the things Gray just said. He wasn't usually one for thinking about consequences of his actions, but in this case, he really should. A wedding would change their lives, regardless of the outcome, because Gray was right. There was no way Natsu wouldn't be affected by it if the assumption turned out to be wrong. He couldn't even begin to imagine how painful it must be to have his husband die in his arms.
A shudder ran through his body, and as a reaction, Gray ran soothing circles over his shoulder blades.
"Natsu... I'm sorry, but I'd prefer to search for another solution. I love you, and I don't want to fuck this up. I know it's already messed up because I don't even remember the first time we kissed or had sex, and I know that you're already scarred... For one, I don't believe in this theory, and two, I don't want to take the risk. If I knew that it would work, I'd do it."
Natsu pushed Gray away so that they could look each other in the eyes. Gray's brows were tense, yet there was an understanding softness in his eyes. This wasn't easy for him. And Natsu knew that what he was going to say wasn't fair, but he couldn't suppress the thought.
"Don't you care that you could possibly end my suffering if you just accepted?"
Gray took a step back, looking shocked, but also angry.
"You know that's not true, and you can't guilt-trip me into marrying you."
"I'm not guilt-tripping you, I'm just saying that it's an option, and it could work!"
Maybe Natsu was letting himself being deluded by the possibility, however low it might be, of saving Gray's life with this, but right then he didn't care. That Gray absolutely refused to consider it unless it was proven to work made him furious.
Because what was there to lose, really? Them being married at the young age of nineteen... well, who cared? They loved each other, and Natsu was sure they'd figure things out. It wasn't like the fact that they were legally married would change their relationship, right? If it didn't prevent Gray's death, so what? Natsu was already suffering as it was.
"Whatever you're thinking right now, you need to knock it off."
"Why? Why can't we just try, and if it doesn't work, you'll forget anywa—"
"Haven't you listened to what I said? I don't want to get married because of a theory that doesn't sound convincing at all!"
"How is it not convincing? The prophecy says we need to 'form a bond', and half the guild said that the first thing that came to their mind when hearing of a 'bond' was marrying. Even you said the same thing."
"I recall you asking me for a 'strong bond between lovers', not just a 'bond'. A bond could be anything, from laughing together to buying a friendship bracelet to kissing or holding hands. The options are endless, and they don't need to be romantic at all. Or did Lydia say it was a romantic bond?"
"N-no..."
Gray let out a sigh, took a tentative step forwards, and put his hands on Natsu's shoulders.
"I can understand that you're desperate and already at a point where you're willing to try anything as long as it seems like it could help. That's exactly why you should rely on me now. Organizing and executing a wedding usually takes months, and we have half a day. Even if I accepted right away without any further explanation, we'd still have to at least buy rings. We'd have to get an appointment for the same day with the marriage registrar, or convince Makarov to—"
"Alright, alright, it would probably be very difficult to arrange, I get it. But aren't you just searching for excuses?"
Gray's brow tensed. "I'm not. I'm trying to explain why I think that this assumption isn't correct. You're free to believe me or not, but you have to stop what you're doing. I know you can make it happen anyway if you really want to. You could just invent something and make me marry you because I believe your lies. But that wouldn't be a loving th—"
Natsu slapped Gray's hands away and glared at him, because what the hell?
"Do you really think I'd ever do such a thing? Just how low is your opinion of me?"
"This has nothing to do with my opinion of you. You're growing more and more desperate, and I think I know best what somebody who thinks he has nothing to lose can cause..."
Natsu gritted his teeth. "Don't you compare your tragic childhood to this situation! Those two are totally unrelated!"
Gray let out an unhappy sigh and hung his head low.
"Sorry... I'm just... worried about you. About your... state of mind."
"If you're that worried, you would try to help me and just say y—ugh!"
Gray's fist hit hard, causing Natsu to sink to his knees while clutching his stomach. It wasn't only the fist that had hit him hard, but with it also the realization of what he'd been about to say, about to do. Just a few minutes ago, he'd said that he wasn't trying to guilt-trip Gray...
'And here I am, doing exactly that... Shit!'
"You're overstepping boundaries. I said 'no'. I know I could be wrong, and if I am, I'll hate myself for it forever, for putting you through even more pain. But right now, I'm convinced that my decision is the right one, and you have to respect that."
Why was Gray still that calm? He had every right to freak out, yet there he was, only giving Natsu a punch, raising his voice a bit, but otherwise being calm and reasonable. How could he still think straight when he was supposed to be angry? Natsu deserved far more than a punch.
"Why... aren't you beating me into a pulp? I... was about to do something... bad."
"I don't beat up somebody who's not fighting back. If you feel the need to be punished for what you did, then stand, promise you won't bring up the issue again unless it's confirmed that it'll solve the problem, and kiss me."
Natsu's head bobbed up. "How is kissing you a punishment?"
The faint blush on Gray's face was just too adorable, and it brought out fond memories which overshadowed Natsu's gloomy thoughts for the moment.
"It's not a punishment per se, but it's something I want right now, and I thought I could just slip it in..."
There was no way Natsu could deny Gray his wish, so he got up and took a step forward.
"I won't bring it up again. Sorry."
Gray nodded approvingly, and then he tilted up Natsu's head so he could seal their lips. It was their first kiss of that day, and thus started out as a hesitant and careful one. Natsu let Gray take the lead, relaxing into the gentle touches that accompanied it. It took Gray a while to grow confident enough to poke his tongue at Natsu's lips, demanding to be let in. Natsu happily welcomed the intruder, and soon the kiss grew hot and needy, their hands roving all over each other's bodies.
When they parted, a string of saliva stretched out between them, which Gray hastily broke, looking flustered. The last time this happened, Gray had been flustered as well—was it something that embarrassed him?
"L-let's go back inside. We still owe Lucy an explanation," Gray muttered.
"No need to be that flustered. I've already seen you in all kinds of intimate situations."
"Sh-shut up! This is new to me."
The blush on Gray's face intensified, and Natsu couldn't resist.
"I've already heard you moaning, seen how your face looks like when you're experiencing sexual plea—"
"Yes, okay, thank you for pointing that out! Now, how about we go back inside?"
Natsu only managed to wipe the smug grin off his face when they entered the guild.
I have to say I'm disappointed when it comes to reviews on this website. The stats show that 50+ people read the last chapter, yet there was only one who commented (thanks, mushi! 3). Is it really too much to ask to take a few seconds to leave a comment? It can be only one word for all I care. I'm just... really sad is all.
To all the ones who ever left a review: thank you! You're my motivation to keep going!