DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.

Thinking (+ flashbacks, "Naruto speaking to Kurama in her mindscape," etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking

Minato knocked the heads of his two shinobis together. A crowd was forming but the Hokage flashed them to his office.

"What were you two thinking?" he asked in exasperation. "My student and an Academy sensei, fighting in something that I HIGHLY doubt was a sanctioned spar, right in front of the Academy."

Kakashi glared at the furiously blushing Academy sensei - Naru-chan's former private tutor - who was staring at the floor, looking like he wanted to be buried in it. He could arrange that. "She's MY wife," he snarled.

Minato slapped himself in the hitai-ate but wanted to slap Kakashi. "Baka!" Oh yes, he was definitely going to "train" Kakashi exceedingly hard tonight.

"What are you talking about?" Iruka asked genuinely, turning toward the jerk.

"Let's speak honestly, ne?" Kakashi requested quietly, dangerously. "You attacked me because you're jealous that I'm with Naru-chan."

"I att-," Iruka stopped himself, clearing his throat and masking his utter disbelief as well as the rest of his emotions. He couldn't believe that Hatake was saying something so similar to what Anko had accused him of. "That's ridiculous," he said after a moment, then turned his gaze toward his village leader for as long as he could. "One of my students ran away to investigate claims that… the boy had made earlier. I moved to find him and ran into you."

"Umino-san," Minato interrupted, having many more important things to do than deal with shinobi bozos, although these things did happen nearly hourly. "I think it's fair to assume that you have no romantic feelings for my daughter."

"Of course not, Hokage-sama. I have known Naruto-chan for a long time. …I need to apologize to her, in fact." Iruka stood up even straighter, looking thoughtful. "Her romantic inclinations are not my concern," he said, throwing a quick glare at Kakashi. "As long as he doesn't hurt her."

"Good," Minato sighed. "We're agreed on that - and you can quote me on it. So what's the problem?"

Kakashi was rubbing his lips through his mask as he thought about the whole thing. There were a few things that had been said while they had their little altercation. "You've got a thing for Anko?"

Iruka took a deep breath and waited for his Hokage to stop scolding his apprentice about, well: for forcing shit like this on the Hokage. As usual, Hatake looked as if the tongue-lashing hadn't phased him at all. "Anko and I have been in a relationship for the past three and a half years."

"Wow," Kakashi said. "Poor you." He chuckled while Iruka murmured threats at him. "So you know about Shisui-san?"

"What about Shisui-san?" Minato asked, unable to help himself. Oh, who was he kidding? He enjoyed shinobi gossip, even (maybe particularly) about their relationships. Living vicariously through them and all that.

Iruka couldn't believe he'd really have to talk about this in front of the possibly-resurrected Yondaime Freaking Hokage. "Hatake-san was said to have arranged a… date between Uchiha Shisui and Anko-chan."

"Maa, I did do that."

"I'll get you for that, you son of a bitch," Iruka mumbled low enough so that he believed the Hokage couldn't hear him. The Hokage, of course, had bijuu-enhanced senses, however.

"Enough," Minato said, pulling out a sheet of paper for Iruka. "Umino-san, I advise speaking to Mitarashi-san about this directly instead of resorting to violence against a comrade. It is Mitarashi-san we're speaking of, ne?"

"Hai," both men said.

Minato nodded and stretched his arm out over his desk, handing Iruka something that looked similar to a mission scroll. Iruka's mouth fell open when he realized what it was. "I saw you fighting Kakashi-kun. I want you to take the next Jonin exam. Every Chunin and Tokubetsu in the village who's served in that rank for two years or more will be required to take it. I think you'll do well. Better get to training when you're not teaching and setting an example for the next generation, ne?"

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. I'm sorry, sir."

"Be on the lookout for an owl," Minato said slyly, thinking about how to best punish the sensei. Maybe Mitarashi-san could help him. "You're excused. And Kakashi-kun: your punishment is two-fold…"

Kakashi went home and found his wife in the kitchen, taking her frustrations out on vegetables. He threw himself on her, draping his arms over her shoulders. "Maa, your father's a meanie."

"No kidding," she grumbled. "What is the deal with you and Iruka-sensei?"

"Just a misunderstanding," he said as he pulled off his mask. He let her drag him around, finding it entertaining.

"You used a lightning wolf on him!"

"Only because he took his swords out and tried to get me," he said, sneaking a dumpling. He popped it in his mouth and let out an infinitely-satisfied but silly moan. "Your father's coming over for dinner, late tonight," he said, putting more weight on her to slow down a possible impending attack. Why he was telling her this when Naru-chan had knives right in front of her was beyond him. He must still have a hidden death wish.

"I'm gonna drug his food," she muttered. Kakashi chuckled and bit her ear.

"Bad vixen."

"Mhm!" Naruto continued dragging him around and she pulled out the additional things she'd apparently need from the fridge. "He didn't eat much fish when he was here last time… So, fish it is, then," she said to herself. "If he's going to be an ass, I'm going to make him teach me seals and the Hiraishin."

"Good!"

"Seriously? You think so?"

Kakashi nodded and finally stood up straight. "I do. Seeing you in that guy's Mokuton? I've never wanted to kill anyone so badly. Well… maybe when the Demon of the Mist and Ice Boy kidnapped you."

"So why did Tou-san stop you and my fox summons?" Naruto asked herself (for the dozenth or so time) rather than Kakashi. She knew he was pissed about how her father had reacted in that fight, too. "Wait! Did you really like me that much back then when we were in Wave?! Before - you know."

Kakashi gave her a look of disbelief as he pulled at the back of her hair. "If you recall, that's just before I admitted my feelings for you. Just before we finally kissed," he reminded her with a smirk, stepping closer to see if she'd do what she did last time. "Do you remember how you kissed me?"

Naruto hummed and felt her face heat up as she attempted to wash more vegetables. "Yeah, we kissed and more before that, but you were wasted," she taunted, seeing him get all pouty about it. "I think that second time, however, started when you asked me what I knew about seduction?"

Kakashi put his hand on the countertop, bending down so he could whisper in her ear. He'd found that her ears were very sensitive. "You complained that you didn't know enough. That you wanted me so bad - and for so long - but I was being a gentleman," he exaggerated. "You complained about being all hot and bothered every time you were near me…"

"You!"

"Hmm?" he chuckled. You're saying that's not what happened?"

"I don't know about that. I kinda remember somebody grinding into me with his… I don't know. Maybe I'm over think… sausage grinding or somethin'." Yeah, she was being silly.

"Maa, Naru-chan: you're right about that," he said, grinding into her just like he had at Tazuna's house but from behind. He turned her around, knowing that he was probably smiling like a fool. "Plus, I have the Sharingan and…"

"You have the Sharingan, and you're constantly using it to record me. When we kiss," she teased, "in the shower…" Kakashi shoved the veggies away and lifted her up on top of the countertop.

"You're damn right I do," he said as he looked her up and down with both eyes open. "I want to remember every detail of every time we make love. Of every time I fuck you," he growled into her ear, grateful that she was in only a yukata and panties. He pulled the tiny things off of her as he ran his tongue and teeth down her neck, managing to get them off as he licked and sucked on her skin until he was devouring one breast after the other. "Fuck: you are so beautiful."

"Let's go upstairs."

"No. Right here, right now," Kakashi argued and pushed her on her back, ordering her not to touch him. He ran lightning chakra through his fingertips as ran his hands all over her, both of them moaning loudly when he moved down to her silken folds. "Open up, baby," he ordered, pulling her legs further apart and making sure her feet were on the countertop, too. He pulled her ass down off of it, then unbuckled his pants. Grabbing his cock, he ran it across her slick heat. "So wet for me."

Naru mewled as he continued teasing her. "Ano - Close the blinds!"

"I don't think so," he rumbled as he tried to decide exactly what to do with her. That was always the problem, and why shadow clones were invented, he was sure of it! Gently circling her clit as he teased her entrance with his cock, he made her cum - demanded it of her - then flipped her over. Pushing inside of her, he decided that was his favorite thing in the world. The way Naru would shout, how tight she was, the way her greedy little pussy: so juicy and hot was begging for him. "You feel so good." He lifted her ass so he could see himself sliding all the way in and out of her even better. "Fuck, Naru: we're going to be spending a LOT of time on this counter."

"You're blushing," he said later, cradling her face in his hands.

"Well, yeah," she agreed, trying to retie her yukata. "And I've gotta toss all these veggies," she mourned. She might be mad at her father, but that didn't mean that she was going to feed him screwed-on vegetables. Kakashi fell down to his knees and smiled up at her. "Gosh, you are SO handsome."

He hummed. "I don't know about that. But I know I love you."

"I love you, too." She bent over to kiss him, running her hand down his stellar abs and deciding it was her turn to take charge.

Minato arrived a few hours later to find Jiraiya writing in one of his perv journals as he sat on the ground, leaning against their home. "I swear to Kami, Jiraiya-sensei: if you were peeping on my…"

"Don't be disgusting. That's my granddaughter in there I looked away from! Although I did hear some interesting things." Jiraiya tapped his pencil against his chin. Damn! He had meant to leave, but as an author, just couldn't pry himself away from listening to such interesting conversations. Yeah: "conversations:" that's one way of putting it.

Those two really can't keep their hands off each other.

"I don't want to know!"

/

"I want you to begin training your Mangekyo with Shisui-san daily beginning after your mission, Kakashi-kun."

"And you're going to teach me the Hiraishin and sealing, old man," Naruto demanded as she gave her father a laxative-laced piece of pie that night.

Minato nodded, ecstatic to do exactly that. Naruto really was a wonderful cook, and she was being so careful to give him the biggest piece of the pie. How sweet was his daughter? Very sweet! He had been so worried that she'd been angry with him. "This, too, is delicious, Naruto," he said, smiling. It was too bad that his stomach was a little upset.

Jiraiya and Kakashi schooled their features, looking at each other and wondering if their teeth were black, too. Kakashi had his mask on, of course, but that didn't mean he wanted black teeth. Naruto looked away from her father and gave them a saucy wink. They got up and took their desserts to the engawa where Minato pulled a log out of a seal. "Alright, Kakashi. I'd like you to suck this into your eye."

Kakashi's eyes popped out of his head and Naru began laughing. What a weird thing to say.

Minato pretended to try to remember the name of Kakashi and Obito's jutsu. "'Kamui?' Does that sound familiar to you? It's a little-known ability of the Sharingan, only accessible to one set of eyes in every several generations, they say."

Kakashi nodded hesitantly, not realizing that his wife was paling dramatically. "I… felt the word in my head a few times," he said before scratching at his hair awkwardly. That was the best way to put it, though. What a strange thing.

Naruto closed her eyes as her head began pounding. Suddenly she was somewhere else: on the desolate battleground of the Fourth Shinobi War. Kakashi had been thrown or something, and Gyuki came flying out of his eye - almost like he was unraveling from it. "Excuse me for a sec," she whispered, staggering to get to the bathroom where she almost threw up. "What the fuck?!"

What an insane thought! –It was like I was there for a second, though! She threw water on her face and must have been in the bathroom for a while because her father came knocking. "Sorry!"

"It's alright. Are you ill?"

"Ah, I'm never ill," she said, still feeling queasy. "I'm just being a weirdo. Do you think you can excuse me for a while?"

"Sure," he said, then kissed her forehead, which definitely surprised her.

He didn't realize that she nearly flinched at someone other than Kakashi suddenly being that close to her - or maybe it was the black teeth that freaked her out, she later thought. –That was her doing, though.

"You can come by the office around noon to talk about the Hiraishin?"

"Okay, thank you." She walked upstairs, feeling really dizzy and hoping that the men wouldn't mind cleaning up after dinner. She fell into her pillows and was out cold. Naru didn't wake up until Jiraiya carried Kakashi up to toss him in bed. He was chakra exhausted and shivering, and since Naruto couldn't get him cognizant enough to do it himself, she forced his teeth onto her arm and carefully used her chakra to bring his jaw up so that he'd latch on to her.

"You okay?" Naru asked the next morning.

"Yeah, I feel great," Kakashi admitted. "Thank you, Naru-chan. You really shouldn't have to do that," he said guiltily, feeling like an ass for feeding on her chakra. –And being addicted to it: the whole thing aside from when they did it for fun. It amazed him that he could come back from being thoroughly chakra-exhausted to feeling normal - better than normal - after sucking on his wife for a while, however. He liked sucking on her, so that was more than convenient.

Her being "convenient" didn't sit well with him, though. Also, not being strong enough on his own…

"You know I like sharing with you. What did they do to you last night to put you in that state?"

"Maa, before sensei got a little… sick," he said, giving her a playfully dirty look, "they had me try to teleport that log back and forth to what I'm calling the Kamui dimension with the Sharingan. Sensei and Jiraiya-sama had to attack me to get it to work the first few times." So far he could only twist the log and make part of it disappear or rather, go elsewhere.

Naru gawked at him before shaking her head and doling out miso soup and eggplant shakshuka, trying to decide if she should avenge him or thank her father and grandfather. She just wanted Kakashi to be okay.

"It was that taxing, huh? What am I saying," she asked herself in a lower voice, "I can't even imagine having an ability like that." Although I can apparently imagine Kakashi sucking a bijuu into and out of one of his pretty eyes.

Maybe I really should be an author: I seem to have a wild enough imagination.

Kakashi was already an hour late to meet his team for his mission, so he convinced his little wife to have what turned out NOT to be a "quickie" at the breakfast table.

Best. Breakfast. Ever.

Naru watched him leave - after she all but begged him to take care of himself and come back to her. With the Akatsuki being out there, and with people knowing that they were married, Naru was really afraid that he'd be targeted. She was worried enough that it quelled her jealousy in not being able to do missions right now.

Jiraiya showed up to go over some interesting toad stuff before she met her father to look at the Hiraishin and some other helpful seals. Hilariously enough, the Hokage was wearing a mask that was similar to the ones Kakashi wore and highly put out with her for staining his teeth.

Meh, the black stains would go away in a day or so. If she left them alone.

"Sensei," Minato scolded, "I can't believe you told Kakashi-kun that!"

"I didn't know! Seriously, Mini, I never 'got' the whole Hiraishin thing - and of course, I never needed to, being the great, gallant Jiraiya: Great Toad Sage of Mount Myoboku - slayer of men, lover of ladies…"

"Blegh," Naru interrupted, "you said 'great' twice; that means I get to cut you off."

"Thank Kami," Minato breathed. He never really knew how to stop his sensei from going on with that pseudo-nonsense and usually let him tire himself out.

Naruto scratched her cheek as she looked at her father's notes. "So there's no 'Namikaze Clan' thing in the seal. But if it's a Senju technique, coming from Tobirama and all, how does Kakashi use it?" She could see the seal for what it was, she just couldn't "get" it: something wasn't connecting. "Oh geez: tell me we're not related: me and Kash. I don't want to have like, two-headed babies with three eyes each or something."

"You know, two-headed babies are common among Uzumakis," Jiraiya said as if reciting facts that needed to be shared. "They have to be birthed at the exact same time, right through the snatch only or what used to be the…"

"I'll pound you, old man! You've told me this same bullshit in another lifetime but I won't believe it this time," Naruto said hotly. "And don't say words like 'snatch.'"

"Ha! You believed it before, though, ne? And as far as refraining from using the word 'snatch,' I could say…"

"That's enough," Minato demanded, not wanting to hear things like that either. "Please stop being shameless," he sighed. "Alright you two, the Hiraishin might be a Senju-invented and enhanced technique, I suppose, but it's not like someone else can't use it. You're overthinking things…"

An hour later and Naruto still felt like a dunderhead.

Minato wasn't sure what to think. Naruto had used the Hiraishin in the Fourth Shinobi War as if it were a bloodline she had been using all her life - and to his knowledge, she hadn't been familiar with it before they first used it together. "I know you can do it, Naru-chan, really. Just… put it into action." Naru's face screwed up in a way that made him both melt and laugh. "You look so much like your mother."

"Welp, that's it: I'm outta here," Jiraiya said, jumping out the window. Naru tried to grab him but wasn't motivated enough.

"That old turd," Naru frowned as she watched him all but dancing down the main thoroughfare of the village from the big window. She turned around and saw her father's soft expression, quickly looked away, and scratched at the back of her head. Sighing heavily, she flopped back down into the chair across from him. "So why don't you want your house back? The estate."

That was easier to discuss than the whole deal with Tobi.

Minato was surprised although his expression quickly turned thoughtful. "The only occasion I had time to see it was with your mother. Sometimes," he said, taking a deep breath, "sometimes I regret taking this position. I could've had more time with her," he admitted before trying to smile and bouncing his pencil eraser on his desk. Naruto looked like she was about to leave soon, so he quickly continued. "And now, I wish I had more time with you."

"Oh. It's fine," she replied, smiling despite everything. "Although you avoided me and immediately took off after you got resurrected or whatever, so your words don't match your actions, old man."

Minato chuckled and scratched his chin, glad that one of the real issues they had between them was out on the table. "I wanted to take care of things, myself so that you could lead a better life."

Naruto hummed. "Sounds like bullshit. Sounds like… Madara or something. Tobi: whoever. Bah! My mind gets all funky whenever I think about that." She crossed her arms, hating that she was like this. She DID clearly remember Itachi advising her not to do things alone.

"Naruto," Minato began with concern, "Shikaku-kun or Jiraiya-sensei told you that seals were placed on your mind when you were young, yes?"

"WHAT?!"

"Oh for heaven's sake," Minato said in disbelief.

"That's fucking," she began, thoroughly ignoring her father asking her not to curse. She was who she was, and cursing was how she expressed herself. "...Just what I need. Who did it?! Danzo?! Was he the one that caused me to be this way? I thought I was like this because of my TBI or whatever. –I'm gonna dig his beheaded ass up and kill him again. And his head!"

"I don't think it was Danzo, Naru-chan – and I thought you'd already been made aware of this."

No, Minato had a feeling that Obito or Zetsu might have poorly sealed his daughter's mind. The seals had been so sloppy, but all together, they had really done a number on his little girl. He'd read her file more closely than he had any shinobi's in his forces, naturally, and between her record and the information that he had from Shikaku, Jiraiya, and Tsunade, believed he had a decent understanding of what had happened. Although he really needed to interview Uchiha Itachi…

Naru clicked her tongue and sat back in her chair even though she was still pissed as hell. "What does that even mean? I mean, how can somebody seal a mind? And… can't we just unseal it? I don't get it. Tsk! Hmmm… Why am I such an idiot?! I mean, I'm an Uzumaki, and… do you want your stuff back? And I mean, the house, plus all your stuff… I just…"

Minato waited for her to wind down, remembering another Uzumaki whose mind used to run in circles, her tongue unrestrained. "You're so much like your mom," he said quietly. "I've been thinking."

Naruto waited, but her father seemed to have gone off into his own little world. "That sounds dangerous," she eventually half-snarked. Her father looked up at her and half-grinned.

"I can't do it alone - or maybe I don't want to?" he asked himself as much as Naruto. "From what I've been told, everything foreign that can be has been taken off your mind. And as far as the house goes, I don't need something so large. Your mother and I never moved in, and didn't plan to until you were a little older… Maybe… Bah! You and Kashi wouldn't want your OLD MAN…"

"Wouldn't want my old man to do what?" Naruto asked in a low voice.

Minato cleared his throat and looked out the window before looking back at her. "Your words hit me hard, Naruto," he admitted and saw her shoulders draw in. "You were right. And grandchildren? I - I would like to be there for them. I don't know if it's possible," he added quickly. "I'm not an Uzumaki, and the Kyuubi's chakra is a LOT, but then again, we've been together for over three decades, really," he said, with his hand over his seal.

"You're taking care of him?" Naruto asked hesitantly. She realized at that moment how odd it was that Kurama wasn't going off on him. Neither side of Kurama was going off on either of them or on each other! "Are you alive in there?" she asked him, deciding to momentarily appear in her mindscape.

"Baka!"

Naruto couldn't help but smile. Both Kuramas had said that at the same time. She put her fist out toward her father and after a moment, he reluctantly did the same.

Bumping fists did it, of course.

"Naruto," Kurama's half - well, obviously a little less than half of him - the one that was behind Minato's open seal, greeted her. "You look well."

"I'm okay," she said awkwardly. "I'm going to hug you now."

Kurama looked either hesitant or sick, but Naru bounded over and hugged his snout. That was when some of his siblings (those that had some chakra within her) appeared and began harassing/greeting him.

"Naruto?" Minato asked, having NOT expected this.

"I guess I've got some people -er, bijuu that I need to introduce, huh?"

15 minutes later, Genma knocked on the office door. Minato's appointments were backing up. Naruto picked up the scroll that contained Senju Tobirama's notes on his version of the Hiraishin, doubting if they would help but determined to (make her clones) read it all. "I guess I'll see you later?" She knew she was leaving without a lot of answers.

Actually, she had more questions now than when she came to see him a couple of hours ago!

"Tomorrow: same time," Minato agreed, "but let's meet at the barrier division."

"Okay," she agreed, a little excited about that. And since he was being somewhat reasonable, she decided to make a peace offering. "You can come over if you want," she said without looking up at her father before looking over at Genma: that made it easier. "You can come too if you want dinner or something. I always make too much. Oh!" She reached over and tapped her father's cheek and held back a few chuckles when he ran his tongue over his teeth. She could see him doing it through his snug mask. "All gone!"

Minato got up and moved to a narrow mirror that was behind the door. Hesitantly, he pulled the mask up and looked at his teeth which were no longer discolored. "Thank you, Naru-chan. That was impressive fuuinjutsu."

"Is that what that was?" Naruto asked, much to Genma's amusement. "Laughing at me means no food for you!"

Minato watched them argue teasingly with many thoughts running through his mind. As Naru gave them a lazy wave - so much like Kakashi: they are really rubbing off on each other - he spoke. "Raikage-sama and Bee-sama have asked for your attendance in Kumo. I could Hiraishin you there, but I have to get Raikage-sama's permission first."

The ONLY reason he was considering it was because he'd just met a bunch of bijuu in her seal. All of that chakra was something he could only imagine Naruto handling.

"YES," Naruto shouted, pulling both of her fists down through the air. "DO IT! Pleeeeeeeeeeease?"

"We'll see, Naruto! Now get out of here." He did NOT laugh when she used the seals for the Hiraishin and crashed into the nearby wall. "Perhaps without tearing up my office?"

Naruto slumped while making sure her nose was still in the right place on her face: she'd hit that wall hard! "What a drag…"

Konan really didn't want to give Nagato the documents that she'd just retrieved from Ame's main gate. But no matter his recent mixed signals, Nagato was her friend and village leader. "Konoha has sent a peace treaty." Konan doubted that anyone else would see that Nagato's expression had changed, but she'd known him since they were children.

- Since Yahiko had found them both and had saved their pitiful lives back then. Now the man she'd always loved was a mindless, empty puppet for Nagato to use. Sometimes she wondered how her life had come to this.

Nagato sighed heavily and read through what the Hokage - the Yondaime Hokage, it said, oddly enough - had sent him.

He closed his eyes as he finally finished and read an attached, more personal note to the peace treaty.

"He, Namikaze Minato, knows who I am. Although in his note, he, too, has addressed me as an Uzumaki: Uzumaki Nagato."

Konan swallowed thickly, her anxious mind full of questions.

"Why would Zetsu have failed to bring us this information?" Nagato asked himself out loud more than his partner. He had a strong feeling that Konan was wondering that, too. Although she has always said…

Reluctantly, Nagato met his best friend's eyes. Konan hadn't been the same since the Chunin Exams that were held in Konoha. "You have never trusted him. Zetsu-san, I mean."

Konan's expression fell. She nodded her head because she hated Zetsu. Maybe it was that bit of being a sensor in her, perhaps it was simply his snarkiness and superiority that bothered her, but she couldn't deny it. Lord Pein used him as he did the others, to further their goals, but she would never put it past Zetsu to turn traitor. –If he hasn't been one all along. "What are the Hokage's terms?"

"They are favorable to Ame," Nagato admitted. "Konan-chan," he said carefully, "what Konoha has put in writing would provide guarantees to our people. Protection. Secure trade. Compensation," he added, although the Hokage had openly said that monetary compensation for previous Ame losses would have to be negotiated both internally and externally and occur over time, something that as a leader - it should have been Yahiko - he understood well.

"Nothing can compensate for lives lost," Konan said firmly.

"But compensation and guarantees could mean future lives saved."

Konan looked up at Nagato in surprise. "You sound like Yahiko," she said breathlessly.

Nagato's lips turned upward, and he realized how long it had been since he last smiled. "You honor me."

Konan stepped up, hesitantly taking his hand as she read through what Konoha had sent. No matter how much she disliked or even despised Konoha, she wanted to stay true to Yahiko's dreams. Too soon, she was forced to use her jutsu to hide the peace treaty because - of course - Zetsu showed up to ruin things.

"My lord," Zetsu said, bowing to the tool: the Ame fool he and Obito were using. He grinned at Konan, who looked like she wanted to destroy him.

"Zetsu," Nagato replied, looking particularly sour, Zetsu noted. "Why are you here?"

White Zetsu chuckled, knowing that Black Zetsu couldn't wait to annihilate these two. "I have news! Black Zetsu has recognized Kyuubi's chakra within the Hokage. The Yondaime Hokage!"

Nagato averted his eyes from Konan, who looked shocked. He glared at his plantlike subordinate. "Is this true, Black Zetsu? You have seen this, yourself?"

"I have. You do not seem surprised to know that Namikaze Minato has returned from the dead."

Silence followed his words until Konan stepped forward, putting herself between Nagato and Zetsu. "Much in the shinobi world is unknown and might seem impossible to civilians," she began - although she wondered how the Yondaime Hokage did it, too. She supposed it was too late for Yahiko, after the way they desecrated his body…

"But Pein-sama is a god," White Zetsu said gleefully. "How would something like 'resurrection' get passed a god, I wonder?"

"Who said it did?" Nagato replied, knowing very well that he sounded arrogant and spiteful. "If there's nothing else, you may leave."

"Mou! So mean," White Zetsu continued to grin maliciously as he sunk back into the floor.

Nagato sighed and looked at Konan, who looked terribly conflicted. "We have much to discuss."

If he was a god, maybe Zetsu was an oni.