Ch 61
Outside the vault, River's back was to the doors and she was shaking. The Doctor exited, going to her quickly. "Hey."
"Hey..." She murmured, avoiding his eyes.
He moved to face her, putting his hands on her arms. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah." She lied, her figure still shook beneath his touch.
"No, you're not." He said quietly, pulling her to his chest and wrapping his arms around her.
She swallowed, pressing her face against his chest, "I don't want to go back in there, not today."
"Are you sure?" He stroked her hair soothingly.
She nodded, "It feels like right now she's just a reminder that we could lose this baby at any moment. He could be gone in a second and there is nothing we can do about it."
He was quiet for a moment, his hearts sinking at the mere thoughts of losing this baby. "If you take the TARDIS, I'll get Nardole to give me a lift home."
"Okay." She whispered, "Please, don't be long."
"I'll do my best." He kissed her forehead. She gave him a proper kiss before leaving in the TARDIS, quite obviously upset from visiting Missy.
The Doctor re-entered the Vault. Missy was tapping her fingers on the piano bench, "Well? Where is she?"
"Gone home." He murmured.
"Why? We were just getting started." Missy smirked.
"The kids called, they need her back at the house." He excused.
"Ah, duty calls. Well, tell her I didn't mean to upset her by shouting. Actually, that's a lie I did mean to upset her but I regret it now. See? I can be nice."
He said nothing for a long moment, examining the room. "Did you have a habit of killing children or was my family a special exception?"
It took her a while to respond, "I've killed many people, children included. It's not like I would seek them out, they were just...there, in my way so to speak."
He swallowed, letting his hearts ache for his lost children. "There's your next challenge then. I want you to think of all the parents who screamed and cried because you took their children from them... River and I included."
Her jaw tightened, "Fine."
He stood as he watched her, starting a slow circle around the piano. She put her head in her hands. After about 20 minutes, she looked up, tears running down her cheeks.
"You can understand why River and I are on edge around you." He whispered. He was in front of her now, hands clasped and resing behind him.
"Yes, I do see that now." She murmured.
"You have to think about your actions, not just after you've done them, but before. Apparently, that's a lesson you missed as a child." He whispered that last bit. "That said... I think perhaps you're starting to get somewhere. I'll have Nardole bring you Mexican tonight."
"Alright." She nodded, just as the Doctor's phone rang.
He reached into his pocket and moved to the door as he answered without looking at the caller ID. "Doctor Disco. If you're one of those new Uni students you can bugger off and talk to your own administration. It's summer and I'm busy."
"Dad?" Amelia's frowning voice came from the other end.
"Oh. Er... don't tell your mother you heard that."
"I won't, but can you come home? Mum's sick." She sounded upset.
He frowned, already leaving the vault. "Sick how? What happened?"
"She threw up. She told me she's okay, but I heard it. She didn't look good when she came home." Amelia had many scarring memories of her mother getting horribly ill while pregnant with her siblings. Though she didn't want to admit it, any sign of sickness in her mother scared her.
He could hear her worry clearly. "You know how to get the TARDIS to my office, yeah? Why don't you bring it."
"Okay." She sounded slightly relieved.
Amelia ran to the console room, the sound of the ship soon could be heard over the phone. The Doctor told Nardole to bring Missy food later and to turn the time accelerator back on before hurrying up to his office.
Amelia was waiting anxiously. He greeted her with a soft smile. "I'm sure Mum will be just fine, sweetheart."
"I think she's in her office." She opened the TARDIS door for him, "Can you check on her?"
"Of course. Why don't you fly us home?"
She flew the ship home, having gotten rather good at it. He complimented her flying before finding River.
Like Amelia said, River was in her office, looking over some papers. He knocked softly. "Amelia said you were sick."
"Hmm?" She looked up at him, "Oh, I'm fine."
He went over to her, protectively feeling her forehead with the back of his hand. "She said you vomited."
She didn't seem to have a fever, her eyes not leaving the papers in front of her as she responded, "I did, but I'm pregnant, it happens."
He removed his hand from her head, replacing it with a kiss. "Well, let me know if you'd like a ginger ale or tea or something to help. You had our daughter worried."
She finally looked up at him, "Did I? I told her I was fine."
"She called me." He finally sat down in a chair near to her.
"I had no idea." She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "I was so distracted by this stupid work thing." The papers on her desk were all concerning the archeological dig she was currently running.
"It's not your fault, she was just worried." He murmured, peering over at the papers on her desk. "You don't exactly have the best history of illness during pregnancy."
"I know and I should have considered that." She breathed.
He nodded slowly, hearing a creak outside the door. Knowingly he said in that direction, "Amelia, you can come out now."
The girl crept into the room. She didn't need to ask what happened, she had been eavesdropping the whole time.
He smiled softly. "Mum is just fine, you know."
She nodded, "I heard."
"She flew the TARDIS by herself today." He told River proudly.
"Did you?" River looked at Amelia, smiling.
"To get Dad," Amelia nodded, looking at her mother like she might find some sort of injury on her.
"Well I really appreciate your concern, but I promise there's nothing to worry about." River tried to comfort her, "Throwing up is a normal part of being pregnant, it doesn't always mean something's wrong."
"But doesn't it stop after a few months?" She fretted.
"Not always." She explained.
Amelia nodded, starting to relax. "Do I still have to leave the room when he's born?"
"Yes, we need you to help look after Terra and Arthur." River nodded.
"Can someone else do it?" Her tone was more questioning, not like a complaint. "I... I want to be there this time."
"Well..." River hesitated, looking at her husband.
"We'll think about it," he told her, "but we can't make any promises. We don't know exactly how things will go, so if we do need you to be with your siblings you've got to be okay with that."
"Okay." She nodded.
"Will you let your siblings know we'll be eating dinner in an hour?"
Amelia nodded again, leaving the room.
He looked back at River, glancing at her desk papers once again. "You're not going on that dig soon, are you?" She'd been talking about it for at least a month and he knew the team was already fully hired.
"We're supposed to start excavating the site next week. I was planning on only supervising because of this," She gestured to her belly, "But it's starting to look like I'm going to need to be more involved now."
"More involved as in...?"
"They're going to need me out there every day helping with the digging."
He looked unsure. "Are you sure that's a good idea?"
"I don't know." She murmured, "I know that I probably shouldn't, but I've been looking forward to this dig for so long." It was clear in her voice that she was frustrated.
He was often just as worried as Amelia, though wouldn't admit it. The dig was reminding him uncomfortably of the Library. "I want you to bring precautions."
She raised her eyebrows slightly, having thought he'd be more against her going, "You think I should go?"
"You've been planning this for weeks. You shouldn't cancel it all just because you might have to get your hands dirty. You're not going to break from digging." That last part was said more as a reminder for himself than to aid his point. Logically he knew she wasn't made of glass just because she was pregnant, but irrationally he wanted to keep her away from anything with the potential to so much as scratch her. He also kept in mind the work she'd been doing for this project and the excitement she had whenever she talked to him about it. "And it's just a simple restoration anyways... Nothing too dangerous, right?"
She smiled, starting to feel better, "Of course, it's nothing dangerous, just restoring the site and doing a bit more digging to see if there's anything else to uncover."
"And you'll be there for," he paused to remember how long she'd said before, "two weeks?"
"Two and a half." She murmured, "My complete pudding brain of an assistant messed up the paperwork." She the slight annoyance in her tone returned.
The corners of his mouth twitched upwards at the insult that he so often used. "Two and a half weeks." He echoed. "I'm going to have to sneak a few visits."
"You'd better. Baby and I are going to miss you."
He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "We really do need to think of a proper name for Baby."
She smiled weakly, "Yes, we certainly do. Any ideas?"
"Actually, Clara suggested one I thought might work."
"Hmm?" She watched him, listening.
"Felix."
"That's a sweet name." She beamed.
He couldn't help but smile back. "In high consideration, then?"
"Yes, very high."
She leaned in for a kiss. He pulled her close and they shared a proper one. She hummed against his lips, eyes fluttering shut. They were both a bit flush when they pulled away.
"I should start dinner." He murmured.
"Stay. Please? We can order take away."
"I've still got to call now if we want it to be here in an hour." He reminded and pulled his own mobile from his pocket. "What are you in the mood for?"
"Hmm, Chinese? We haven't had that in a while." The children usually requested pizza for take away.
"Do you think that'll bode over well with the kids?"
"No... I suppose we should order pizza instead."
"Tell you what, why don't you pick the toppings?"
"I'm afraid if I do that then we'll be hearing a few complaints from our children." She murmured.
"Well, we can order a plain one for them." He offered.
She shook her head, "It's okay. You don't have to order anything special for me."
"And why is that? " He challenged, tucking a stray curl behind her ear.
"I'm not really in the mood for pizza. The thought of all that cheese… it's making my stomach churn." She breathed.
"Do you want something else from the restaurant?"
She shook her head, "I don't think Felix wants anything Italian tonight." She gave him a soft smile.
He felt his hearts swell. "I think that name is going to stick."
"What do you think, my love? Do you like the name Felix?" She ran her hand along her abdomen, speaking to the baby. A light, bubbly blue and a kick was the response to Rivers touch. "I think he likes it." She smiled, looking back at her husband.
"It means happiness." He hummed.
Her smile widened, "I love it."
They stayed in her office and chatted for a while, during which the Doctor called for the food.
"How did the rest of your time with Missy go?" She asked after a while.
He shrugged, glancing away. "We had a talk about thinking before doing. She's starting to get it... I think."
She touched his cheek to comfort him, "That's good. I'm sorry I didn't stay."
He leaned to her touch. "It's alright. I don't expect that you're comfortable around her. Little steps are fine." She nodded, kissing his forehead. "I really want this, Riv." He leaned his forehead against hers. "I want to believe she can be good."
"I know, darling, I know." She murmured, rubbing his arm, "But you mustn't get your hopes up. She's unpredictable and so we have to stay grounded."
"That's the trouble with hope isn't it?" He scoffed at himself. "Hard to resist."
She hummed, looking down at her lap. He put a hand over hers, the other placing over her belly. "I want her to be good too." River murmured, "Even though I don't like her, I want her to be good. I don't want our children to live constantly afraid. I don't want our baby to be born into a life of being afraid and on the run from her."
He nodded, feeling Felix shift beneath his touch.
Though Arthur and Terra didn't know anything about Missy, Amelia and Freya still had the occasional nightmare about her, their childhood experiences with the Time Lady sticking with them.
"No matter what happens, I'll be here." She assured, "Felix and I will be happy to distract you whenever you need. And you know, I think he already likes you best."
He smiled, meeting her eyes. "I'm glad to hear it."
She smiled back, "He's the happiest when you're around. Like right now, I think his little hearts are going to explode with happiness since he knows you're here." She teased.
"Are you sure you're not projecting?" He teased right back.
"Are you suggesting my hearts are going to burst because you're here?"
"I thought you were being poetic." He said innocently.
She laughed, "I'm sure you did."
He kissed her and they spent a short while chatting and feeling the baby move before the food came.