The relationship between my father and I is strained, to say the least. After mom died, and he chose to have Rachel and Rebecca parent Jacob and I, while he went about his life in an effort to forget mom, I grew to resent him. Then, once he lost most of the use of his legs from diabetes, he expected Jacob and I to care for him, since our sisters had fled. I refused, which put a strain on our already rocky relationship, while Jacob obliged.
As I grew older, however, I realized that he was the only parent I had left, and I should have a relationship with him while he was still here. Every chance i got, I tried to become closer to him. Yet every time I tried, I would take two steps forward and three steps back.
Which brings me to the reason why I was up before noon on a Saturday morning, showered, dressed, and ready to leave the house. Once more I brush my hair, and then make my way to the living room where Billy is sitting in his chair.
"Bella said she'll be here around ten." Billy greets me, and I nod, checking the time. It's nearly ten now, so Bella's truck should be roaring up our driveway any moment.
In the kitchen I open a pop tart and start picking at it, trying my best to not get crumbs on my black constellation sweater. Jacob has obviously already been up and gone, judging by the silence in the house and the dirty dishes in the sink, so at least I won't have to worry about him trying to tag along. I'm already going to be dealing with Bella, and having Jacob there would make it even worse.
Halfway through my first pop tart, I hear the familiar sound of the truck coming up the drive, so I ditch the food in the garbage, tug on my boots and rush outside, shouting a hurried goodbye to Billy.
Bella is stepping out of the truck as I shut the door behind me, and she gives me an uneasy grin as she walks over.
"Hey, Rayna. Thanks for hanging out with me today," Bella says awkwardly, and I get the sudden realization that Bella may feel just as alone as I do.
"Someone's gotta show you the cool places around here, right?" I joke, and Bella gives me a real smile as she giggles a bit.
"Sounds like I came to the right person then," Bella replies, her smile still on her face. "I was thinking of going to the bookstore in town, is that okay with you?"
I nod, and walk over to the passenger side of the truck. Bella gets in the driver's side, and we take off down the road towards Forks.
"So, what do you usually do for fun?" Bella asks, turning on her blinker.
"Normally I hang out with Seth Clearwater. He's my best friend." I declare proudly, watching as Bella's face lits up in recognition.
"Clearwater, hey, I think Charlie does fishing with his dad on the weekends," Bella says, and then adds as on an afterthought. "When he's not working."
"Yeah, Billy goes with them too," I nod. "Seth and I usually hang out around La Push, or his house."
"How long have you known Seth?" Bella asks.
"We've been friends since we were in diapers." I smile, and then look out at Forks.
Bella and I smalltalk for a few more minutes, and then lapse into a comfortable silence. I'm used to Seth always filling in the gaps in conversations, so it's refreshing to have someone not always need to talk. Even if that is one of the things I love about Seth.
The library in Forks ends up being so poorly stocked that Bella doesn't bother getting a card, and I tell her Seattle has a fairly good bookstore. She says she'll be going there soon, and that I can go with her if she wants.
After the unsuccessful library trip, Bella asks if I would be okay going to the grocery store with her. She wasn't planning on going, but she said it would be better than us just hanging out at her house.
"Charlie doesn't really eat at home much. He normally goes to the diner." Bella says as she locks her truck, and we head into the Forks grocery store.
As we walk in, I notice a rather shiny black mercedes in the parking lot, and can't help but wonder who in Forks would have a vehicle like that. It looks out of place, surrounded by all of the other cars, varying in their degree of condition. None of them come close to the pristine shine of the mercedes though, and I know that Jacob would lose his mind if he saw it.
Inside, Bella heads straight for the bread and grabs other basic necessities, then we go over to the meat section. This part is crucial, she tells me, as Charlie is a big fan of meat. I laugh, because Billy is the same.
"Shoot, I forgot the garlic. Rayna, would you mind go grabbing two?" Bella asks, her face scrunched up as she examines two different New York strips aside a chicken breast.
"No problem," I sigh, and hurry out of Bella's decision making process. Never before had I seen someone that intense about meat, and I was glad to be able to dip out of it.
As I turn down the produce section, I notice a stunningly gorgeous couple standing in front of garlic, exactly where I needed to go.
They are both female, although one is obviously a teenager while the other is around mid twenties. The older one has pale, beautiful features much like the younger one, and her heart shaped face, billows of soft, caramel colored hair remind me of the Great is small, slender, yet less angular and more rounded than her companion.
The younger one reminds me of a pixie, with her small stature, smaller than the other, and she's thin to the point where it makes me feel very very self conscious of myself. Her hair is cropped short and inky black, pointing in every direction which seems to contrast with her beautifully arched, long, delicate eyebrows. Her large eyes flit to mine, and I'm shocked not only by their odd golden color, but the way she looks like she was expecting me.
Yet the more I look at them, and why I looked at them for so long is beyond me, the more I could see there was something off about them. First is the fact that they both looked as though they either had broken noses, or hadn't slept in days. Plus, their features themselves are off, they look too sharp and fake; and their skin is lacking almost any pigmentation, except for the dark circles under their eyes. In the light of the grocery store, it almost seems like they're so pale that they glitter.
Everything about them puts me on edge, and the hair on the back of my neck stands up. My instincts are telling me run, and my body is tensing as though I'm about to fight.
The older one raises her head so her eyes bore into mine for a moment, and then flit away. Realization dawns on me as I see the same golden color as the other, and I feel as though the wind has been knocked out of me.
"Cullens," I murmur, almost inaudible to myself even. Yet as though they heard me, the two both instantly snap their attention to me.
I hold eyes with the pixie-like one for a few second, before she looks away. I see her mouth move, but just barely, and inhumanly fast, before they both abruptly turn away with their cart, and head towards the front of the store. Even the way they walk is inhuman, much too graceful and fluid.
I still have chills as I grab the garlic, but the urge to fight has passed and my muscles are no longer tense. I wonder if I reacted so strongly because of the legends, or because the legends are true and my Quileute blood knew vampires were near.
Either way, I hurry back to Bella so she doesn't worry why I've been gone for so long. When I reach her, she has decided to get both New York strips and the chicken breast, along with a few pounds of hamburger.
I put the garlic in the cart, and we check out. We hurry out to the truck and load the groceries inside, while Bella blasts the heat. While we had been in the grocery store, it had started sleeting, so it was wet and cold out, usual for Forks. The cab of the truck soon became warm and toasty and felt nostalgic, for I had been in this truck many times before.
Once we reach Bella's house, we unload the groceries and soon stand in the kitchen, a somewhat awkward silence filling the air between us.
"Sorry, I know this was probably boring for you, grocery shopping and an unfulfilling library trip." Bella apologizes, chewing on the inside of her cheek.
I look at the clock, and am surprised to see that it's already almost four o'clock. "Nah, it was fun. I don't usually visit Forks much, so it was kinda nice."
"Well, I'm glad you had fun," Bella says, and then looks at the time herself. "I should probably start making dinner for Charlie."
"Yeah, he's gotta be coming home soon, right?" I ask, and Bella nods. "You guys should come down to the Rez for dinner sometime. Get out of Forks."
Bella laughs. "Definitely."
She takes me back down to La Push, and I wave goodbye to her as she leaves. After today, I realize that Bella Swan might just not be so bad.
-o-
The rest of the weekend passes by uneventfully. I hang out with Seth on Sunday, and Jacob pouts until Tuesday about not being able to come with and hang out with Bella. Sometimes, I feel as though I'm the older sibling, and then I remember that technically I am, because of the whole reincarnated situation. Yet even though I've been reincarnated, making me over a hundred years old, I still have to deal with teenage hormones and all the lovely stuff that comes along with growing up.
Tuesday morning I wake up to a fine layer of snow covering La Push, and I dress with enthusiasm. I love the snow, and it drives my brother crazy. Since I know I'll be walking, I tug on a hat and mittens, then tug on my boots and trek over to Seth's house.
As I near Seth's door, something wet and cold smacks onto the back of my head, and I turn to see Seth doubled over in laughter. My eyes narrow as I quickly scrape together a snowball of my own, and lob it right at his face. He notices at the last second and stands up, making it hit his stomach.
"You're gonna get it now, Black!" Seth shouts, and I laugh.
"Bring it, Clearwater!" I shout back, and start booking it towards school.
The entire way there consists of us throwing snow at each other and slipping on ice, but that doesn't stop us from running. Seth hits me almost every time he aimed for me, whereas I got him maybe one out of five times.
Even with my terrible aim, we still manage to end up fairly wet as we arrive at school. As we enter, I see Jacob, Quil, and Embry standing near their lockers. With a grin on my face I take my hat off and shake my head back and forth at them, making cold water droplets fling onto them.
"Rayna!" They shout indignantly, and I respond by taking off my mittens and flinging that water onto them.
"See you after school!" I grin, and hurry off to my locker with Seth.
"You know, they're going to get you back for that," Seth laughs.
"I'm counting on it," I respond mischievously, and Seth just shakes his head at me. I put my jacket in my locker and smooth out my constellation sweater, the same one I wore on Saturday. Seth got me it for Christmas, and it's one of my favorite sweaters.
The rest of the school day consists of everyone buzzing over the snow, and several people making plans for a snowball fight. Knowing La Push though, the snow will be too mushy for us to have any sort of successful snowball fight whatsoever.
Just as I thought, when we leave school, the snow is all but gone. Brady and Collin are disappointed, and still scrape together enough snow to have a mini snow fight. Mainly with each other though, because Nikkita ditched them the minute she saw them reach for the snow, and Seth and I left for our houses. The snow fight we had that morning was enough for us, since our things were still wet.
Of course, once I reach my house, I am descended upon by the three idiots, in other words Jacob, Quil, and Embry. They pelt me with snowballs, which turn to mushy messes once they hit me, and I slip on the ice during the onslaught.
My elbow cracks onto the pavement, sending waves of pain up my arm, and I groan at the feeling.
"Shit, Rayna, are you okay?" Quil hurries over to me, and offers a hand to help pull me up.
The pain radiating through my arm makes me a bit more testy than I normally would be, and I yank on his arm hard enough for Quil to slip and end up next to me.
"I'm peachy." I grumble, and carefully stand up, then walk into the house.
Billy is watching T.V., so he doesn't see me at first. That gives me time to change into dry clothes, and fuzzy socks before heading out and greeting him.
"Hey, dad." I say, and tie my damp hair up into a bun.
"How was school?" Billy asks, his eyes still focused on his game show.
"It was fine, did some meth, shot up some heroin. Also, I got engaged to a stripper, so, I'm sure you'll love the wedding." I list off, walking into the kitchen to get a glass of water.
"That's good," Billy says, and I hear the commercials come on. "So, whats her name? Something classy, I hope, like Glitter?"
"No, but close. Sparkles." I respond dryly. Billy chuckles as he rolls into the kitchen, and I fill my glass with water.
"Bella got in a car accident today," Billy begins, and he says something else but I don't hear him.
It's as though time slows down, my blood turns to ice and my chest tightens. I feel my heart thud in my chest as the blood rushes to my ears, my eyes fill with tears and the glass slips out of my grip and shatters on the floor but it doesn't matter, because Bella got in a car accident and that can only mean that she's dead because that's what cars do, they malfunction and kill people, and then they're gone forever and there's nothing you can do to change it or help it-
"Rayna!" Billy's concerned voice breaks through my thoughts.
I blink and realize I'm on the floor clutching a shard of glass, letting it cut into my palm as I grip it tightly in my hands. I release it, glad that I hadn't yet brought it to my wrist.
"Bella is okay, Rayna," Billy assures me. "She's unharmed, not even a scratch on her. A van slid on the ice and hit her truck, but managed to miss her."
Billy says the last part darkly, and I don't know why. I don't pay much attention to it anyways, though, because I'm angry at him for freaking me out like that.
"You know how I react to that sort of stuff, yet you couldn't first tell me she was okay?" I demand, wiping my eyes of my unshed tears.
"I didn't think you would react so strongly, Rey." Billy's eyes are kind as he looks at me, but I can see the worry in his eyes.
"Whatever. Well thanks for letting me know." I push off the ground and head outside, ignoring Billy's protests.
The snow has melted now, for the most part, and I feel myself becoming more numb as I walk through the woods and down to First Beach, stopping at my tree before I go. There, I pick up my bag covered with a tarp, and bring the whole thing with me. That is when I notice I still have the shard of glass in my hand.
When I reach my destination, a driftwood tree with roots sticking out like the legs of a huge, pale spider, I drop my pack and begin setting up for the night. First I lay down the tarp, so the remaining wetness won't bother me. Then, I take out my two sleeping bags, lay one down as padding and lay the other one down for me to sleep in, and then I tuck my thick blanket and pillow inside the sleeping bag.
Remaining in the bag is my spare tarp, to set up over my body to protect me from any rain or snow while I sleep, another warm blanket, and toilet paper. I have this bag setup for times like these, and I've used it more than I thought I would, and more than once I've forgotten to bring a space heater. Of course, I once again forgot the space heater.
I know how stupid it is, sleeping on a beach while I have a perfectly good bed at home, but I can't be around Billy right now. Or Jacob, because he would side with Billy. And yeah, I know I'm over-reacting, but doing this makes me feel as though I have control over my life. That's also why I cut myself, to feel like I have control and to help bring me out of my flashbacks to my past life.
Eventually, it gets dark out, and I crawl into the sleeping bag and tuck my blankets around me, effectively keeping the chill out. In fact, I seem to have done such a great job that when someone shakes me awake in the morning, I'm half out of my sleeping bag with my bare arms sprawled out on the ground.
"Are you okay?" A soft voice asks me, and I groggily open my eyes to see the scarred face of Emily Young.
I watch as her eyes trail across my scarred arms, and widen at the ones I made last night before I fell asleep. I quickly find my sweatshirt and yank it on, ignoring Emily's concern.
"Are you okay?" Emily asks again, this time her voice kinder and more gentle.
"Yes." I respond sleepily, and blink at the bright light of the morning sun. "How did you.. Why are you here?"
"I run on First Beach every morning," Emily says, her eyes still full of concern. I hate that look. "Are you hungry? Do you need a place to sleep?"
"No, I have a house. I just needed to be alone for the night," I yawn, and start gathering my things into my bag. "Do you know what time it is?"
"It's nine thirty three," Emily looks around, and then back at me. "Do you want to come to my house for breakfast?"
I know she must be taking pity on me since she saw my arms, so I decline. "No thanks."
"Please, I would feel a lot better knowing you've had a hot meal," Emily bites her lip, looking at me with her kind eyes.
"No," I say firmly. "I'm going to go home now"
Emily backs away as I stand up and quickly roll up my things and shove them in my bag, then take a few steps towards the woods. I see Emily's eyes widen in horror as she takes in my feet, clad only in fuzzy socks with no shoes.
"I promise, I forgot to put shoes on before I left my house." I assure Emily, since I get the feeling that she was about to start freaking out.
She opens her mouth to say something more, but I hurry past her and head home. She's nice, definitely, but much too clingy for my taste. I put my bag back in its place, after wrapping it in the tarp. My socks squish on the forest floor as I walk, and I can't wait until I'm able to change into dry socks.
When I get home, Billy is gone so the house is empty. There's a note on the table from Billy, and I toss it in the trash after I read it.
Jacob, if Rayna is not home by the time you get off from school, call Old Quil. Rayna, if you read this, you are not allowed to leave the house until I get back.
Sure, now he starts to care.
-o-
I hope you guys liked this, sorry it's a bit late. Heads up, i'm probably going to skip through Twilight and dive into New Moon, since that's when the fun really begins :)
I'll update once I get five reviews :) thank you to FlowerChild23, Tanner Clark, and makayamann51 for reviewing last chatper! Also, makaylamann51, lets just say our minds work fairly similarly ;)
Thank you to everyone thats followed and favorited as well! And dont be afraid to leave any suggestions in a review.
-TheFlyingGraysons