Ch 83

The Doctor reentered the bedroom with his wailing son, finding River in the same position she was before. "Hey, Riv." He murmured, voice quiet compared to their son.

She sat up a little more. "What's wrong?"

"He's hungry," the Doctor answered. "Again."

"Okay." She nodded, holding her arms out. "Where's Freya?"

He handed the baby over, then hesitated with the answer, not wanting to stress her more than she already was. His second thoughts reminded him that she'd probably find it less forgivable if he withheld the information. "I... Don't know."

"What?" Her face paled.

He explained the situation as the baby nursed and how Freya got upset. "Every phone call I've made was a dead end."

"We have to go find her." River looked worried, trying to get out of bed. Felix whimpered when River moved, milk dribbling out of his mouth.

"I'm already on it." He assured. "Please, you've got to stay in bed."

"I can't just sit here while our daughter is missing!" She was growing more upset, not even hearing the whimpering baby.

"I promise I'm going to find her, Riv, but you're no good to her if you push yourself to the point of injury."

She sighed, "But I want to help. I have to help."

He tried to think of some sort of compromise. "What if you stayed in the console and acted as my eyes and ears? I'll keep an earpiece in."

"Fine." She agreed.

Felix was starting to wail again, trying to get his mother's attention since she wasn't feeding him. The Doctor looked down at him. "He needs help latching on again."

"Oh, um..." River frowned, refocusing on the baby as she shakily repositioned him to nurse again.

She looked up at the feeling of the Doctor's hand on her arm. She met his eye, finding them as equally worried as she was. "Are you okay?" She asked softly.

He shook his head. "I feel like I'm saying all the wrong things to the kids."

She held her arm out, inviting him for a hug.

He accepted, mindful of Felix. "It's so hard to lie to them." There were things, of course, that were always going to stay private, like the events on Gallifrey and Missy. "I don't know how to help them understand. It's not as simple anymore as 'Mummy got hurt but she's fine now.' They ask questions that I can't answer. I... I don't want them to feel left out or like I've demeaned them."

"I know." She soothed, rubbing his arm and pressing a kiss to his head, "Maybe...we need to start telling them the truth—Amelia and Freya at least."

He nodded and they both sighed at the same time. The Doctor helped her sit back on the bed with Felix. He sat with them and held River close, wanting to comfort her as much as her touch did for him. She pressed her forehead to his jaw, the two sitting like that for a short while. Felix finished nursing, quiet and sleepy once more.

Vastra knocked after a while, coming to check on them. After the Songs explained to her what happened, Vastra offered to hold Felix for them while they searched for Freya.

The Doctor's phone buzzed and he pulled it out quickly hoping it was his daughter. "Jack's sent me the tracking number for Freya's Time Hopper," he murmured.

"Okay. Let's go find her. And we're taking those Time Hoppers away." River started to get up.

The Doctor kept an arm around River as they all headed to the console room. They walked slowly— River's body still ached and she wasn't entirely stable. Vastra voiced her worries while the Doctor wisely didn't try to change River's mind.

He gave River the tracking number when they got to the console. "The trouble about using a Hopper in the TARDIS and that she could be anywhere the TARDIS has been or will be within the last or next 100 years."

River's eyes widened, "Anywhere?"

"Yes." the Doctor swallowed. "Anywhere."

"Okay. If we think this through we can narrow things down. Why did she get angry?"

"I told her she had a choice between apologizing to Jack or having her Hopper taken away. She accused me of keeping secrets and 'treating her like a baby'."

"I bet she went to find out what happened. That's what she would do if she thought you were lying."

The Doctor's hearts tightened at the realization of where exactly that was. Scrambling for the controls, he punched in the tracking number and set the scan to look at the Mondasian colony ship.

Sure enough, Freya's location appeared on the ship. It looked like their daughter was on the level they had last been on. "Oh god..." The Doctor was stunned speechless, looking between the screen and his wife.

"She's going to find Missy." River breathed. "Get the vortex manipulator. I'm coming with you."

"I thought we agreed you'd stay?" He fretted.

"But this changes things, I can't stay knowing that she's there."

He sighed, knowing he'd do the same thing in her position. "Vastra, please keep an eye on Felix? Contact us if anything happens."

The woman nodded, hesitant about letting River go.

He kissed Felix's forehead, taking River's hand. "I don't suppose there's any talking you out of this?"

She shook her head, "Not a chance."

He keyed in the coordinates on the vortex manipulator. "Okay... but please to push yourself. You're still healing."

Just as they were about to leave, an incoming message popped onto the scanner screen. The Doctor pulled the monitor around to read it.

Come retrieve your offspring before I boot her down to the lower floors for being irritating. -M

"Damn it," he muttered, showing it to River. River looked panicked, putting a hand to her head.

"River, are you sure you're going to be alright?" Vastra asked.

"I'm fine." She nodded, "Let's go."

Not looking convinced, the Doctor activated the device and the two of them dematerialized. Soon, they were back on the ship, in the same field they had left from.

The place looked absolutely demolished. Where trees and grass once stood, there was ash and soot. River was quiet and tense against the onslaught of recent memories.

"I don't think they're on this floor anymore," the Doctor whispered, still holding onto her.

"How will we find them?" She whispered.

He pulled his sonic out, scanning the area. "There's another solar farm five floors up. We should check there… Are you okay?"

She nodded solemnly.

He still looked worried. "We should find a lift."

"Do you remember where they were?"

"Em..." He soniced the air again briefly before getting a locked signal. "Few minute's walk that way."

"Right…" River sighed as they started in the direction of the lifts.

"They should still be working," the Doctor murmured upon spotting them.

They were silent as they rode up, trying not to let the recent memories drown them. When the lift doors opened, the scene looked much like the floor they had been on was supposed to look like: A green field was in front of them, a collection of cottages in the distance.

Before they could take two steps forward, guns were suddenly being pointed at their heads. "On your knees. Now!"

The two immediately got down. "We're here to see Missy." River spoke.

"How do you know about her?" A woman asked. It was the same blond-ish woman who had allowed them sanctuary in the house last time they were there. She seemed older by at least a few years.

"We were with her when she first arrived."

The woman lowered her gun. "You're... the Songs?"

River nodded, relaxing slightly.

The others followed her lead, putting their guns down as well. "Follow me."

River grabbed her husband's hand, following behind them. The two of them were lead towards the cottages, which they could see as they got closer were surrounded by barbed wire.

There was someone waiting for them on the front porch of one of the cottages. A woman dressed in Victorian attire, looking rather smug.

The Doctor's expression hardened. "Where's my daughter?" He asked when she was within hearing distance.

"Oh, will you hold on a minute? I'm trying to remember every detail of this moment: The day you two came crawling back." Missy smiled.

"You know we didn't have a choice," he hissed. "Where's Freya?"

"Upstairs. I had to tie her to a chair because she wouldn't stop trying to attack me."

"You what!?"

"Oh, calm down. She's fine! I, on the other hand, have a rather nasty bruise."

"I don't care." They burst into the cottage.

Freya was sitting on the couch, not tied up or trying to attack anyone. The time hopper was no longer around her wrist but in Missy's hand.

"Freya..." The Doctor started.

Freya crosses her arms and looked away, not speaking.

He glanced back at River. "Maybe you should—"

"What the hell were you thinking?!" River shouted.

The Doctor and Freya flinched, the latter squaring her jaw and responding in a similar tone. "I was thinking I wanted the truth! I guess that isn't a concept you or dad is familiar with."

"Nothing that we told you was a lie. We didn't tell you everything because we weren't ready to share it. It's not up to you to decide how much of this situation you get to know!" River was not taking the soft approach the Doctor hoped she would.

"Were you even planning on telling me about this?" Freya made a gesture to the room and Missy, who was now standing behind her parents. "About her?"

"We weren't ready to talk about it, Freya! It's not up to you to decide how much information we share with you! If we want to keep something private then we have that right. You don't have a time hopper so you can undermine our authority!" River hadn't ever been this angry at one of her children before.

"We're a family, we shouldn't have to keep things like this private!" Freya was just as loud as her mother, red-faced at this point as angry tears sprung to the corners of her eyes.

Missy mimed drinking a cup of tea as she delightedly watched the fight play out.

"This isn't hiding our Christmas presents, this is- this is your life! This is my life! This is the woman who tried to kill you when you had Arthur and succeeded and she almost did it again!" Freya continued. "You could have died, again. I could've lost another brother—how could you keep that from us? How can you be so selfish?! You-you could have just disappeared and never come back and neither you or dad would've said a damn word!"

"Do you want to know what happened? Is that what will make you happy?"

"Do you think I trekked out to ship full of Cybermen because I didn't want the truth?" Freya hissed.

"Fine! Here's the whole fucking story since you think you're so ready for it!" River was spilling everything before the Doctor could interrupt. "Missy's regeneration energy was reinstated by the new Gallifreyan council a few years ago. There was a new one because your father destroyed the old council in cold blood when Rassilon forced me to miscarry and nearly killed me in the process."

"You were—!?"

River put up a hand, not finished. "Missy got herself into some sort of trouble with the Executioners and your father was called to watch over her for a thousand years. We put her in a vault under the university and later in the TARDIS when complications arose. We didn't want you four to constantly be worrying about her like we were so we decided not to tell you. We accelerated Missy's time so she was almost finished with her sentence." She was talking at fast, not able to stop herself. "We were trying to teach her to be good but she fucked us over by tampering with the controls and sending us here to give her a final test. The stress sent me into preterm labor and your brother would have died if Missy hadn't helped. Your father and I weren't ready to talk about it, we haven't even talked about it with each other let alone with you. So are you happy now, Freya?!" She looked like she might explode, furious and upset.

The three others stared at her. Freya stood and ran from the room out the back door. River didn't move, just letting her go.

"Is one of you going to go after her, or should I?" Missy spoked up, tapping her chin.

River turned to glare at Missy before she and the Doctor followed, the latter shocked into silence.

The back door was open and Freya could be seen racing across the green fields away from the house. She was already small in the distance, not seeming to have a particular direction aside from away from them.

They started after her at a jog, though river hardly had the energy or the strength to run. The Doctor wanted to keep pace with River, but Freya was much faster and he was worried they might lose track of her. "River, do you want me to run ahead?"

She shook her head, "Let her go. She'll tire herself out eventually." They slowed to a walk, out of breath already.

"Why... why did you tell her all of that?"

"Because she needs to learn that there are reasons behind our lies and why we don't always tell the whole story." River's expression was hard. "She shouldn't have pulled this stunt if she didn't want to hear the truth."

"What I mean is that I thought we were going to tell it to her in a more," he paused to think of the word, "controlled way."

"I don't know. Being here...it's so hard." Her shoulders slumped as the weight of her outburst started to settle.

"My love, I think you should go back to the TARDIS. I know you're worried about Freya, but this place isn't good for you. Being near Missy isn't good for you... and after what just happened, I think you need to let me take care of this part."

"I'm fine." She tried to insist, though there were tears in her eyes.

He stopped them, putting his hands on her shoulders. "River, you're not. You're really not." He hadn't really seen her this upset since Gallifrey, and certainly not this angry. "And as much as I know you want to help with this, you need to focus on yourself."

"But we only have the one Vortex manipulator," she pointed out.

"Missy has Freya's time hopper." He pointed out, then thought for a moment and added, "And if we're not back in two hours, then you'll know where to find us."

"Okay, fine." she gave in.

He kissed her cheek. "You can watch us from the console. I promise I'll shout if there's trouble."

River sighed, squeezing his hand before punching in the VM coordinates and disappearing.