You've gotta be grilling my bananas right now.
As if our lives aren't hard enough as is.
"What." Daryl deadpanned, his voice being all the indication needed that he doesn't believe what he just heard.
"At the CDC. Jenner told me." Rick admitted.
"Whatever it is..." Rick shook his head, before all but whispering in a tired gravelly voice, "We all carry it."
Wait so… let me wrap my head around this.
If we all carry it, then it's gotta be a non-lethal pathogen of some sort. It only takes over after death or after direct infection. So that means it's gotta be spread by not just bites or scratches.
"And you never said anything." Carol
"Would it have made a difference?"
Oh my god.
I dipped my head, running a hand through my hair, letting it settle over my mouth.
"That is not your call." I don't think I've ever heard Glenn sound so betrayed.
"Kay, when I found out about he walkers in the barn, I told for the good of everyone." Glenn spoke fast.
Rick looked at him like he's ready to square up. "Well I thought it best if people didn't know."
Glenn stared at him, mouth agape. Like he doesn't recognize the person he's looking at.
I understand why Rick didn't tell us. He's a cop. It's second nature to not share information that could cause panic. Doesn't mean it was the right thing. Or any less shocking.
But everything looks better in the rear-view.
Truthfully if I'd been in his position, I might've done the exact same thing. With one key difference.
I wouldn't have kept it from everybody. I'd have shared my suspicion with at least Rick, Daryl, and probably a few others I know can keep a level head (like Dale, or at the time Shane, maybe even Lori), but I wouldn't have told the whole group until I knew for certain.
I know from experience that not talking to people about the important stuff, is a good way to drive a divide between you and them. That used to mean ending up in isolation, now… it could mean our lives.
This affects everyone's safety. That — no matter if he only did it because he thought it was right — is not something I can let pass unchecked.
"I'm not gonna say it was the right decision,"Rick and the others looked at me. "I understand why you did it, but we're not kids Rick. We don't need to be sheltered from the truth. Keeping this to yourself put all of us —including you and your family — at risk. That was something we needed to know sooner rather than later."
"How was I supposed to know what that crazy son of a bitch said had any truth to it?" he almost bore his teeth at me, taking an understandably agitated approach with me.
Daryl stiffened and I grabbed his arm immediately before the signature Dixon attitude can rear its head. The last thing I need right now is to end another fight; at this point I might just let it happen if one breaks out and that won't be good for anyone.
"You don't need to know everything, nobody does or ever did. The whole point of sticking together is to take the pressure on each of our shoulders down to manageable levels."
"I know you didn't know for sure and that's why you were hesitant to say anything, but I need to know you understand that this ignorance could have cost us a lot more than it did. I don't know about you, but I'd rather keep our losses to as few and non-critical as we can manage."
Rick locked his jaw, glancing down. A dead giveaway I recognize by this point, as him giving in to at least giving some serious thought to what's been said.
However, turning his back and walking away without a word, leaving the rest of us to stare after his rigid back? That's new.
This new behavior has me worried.
Lori pat her son's head and gestured at me before following after her husband.
Carl came over by me and I ruffled his hair.
What did Jenner say when he was explaining while he showed us that research footage? It could be viral, bacterial, or fungal?
He was researching but maybe he was looking at it wrong. He didn't have a lot to go off of from what I saw.
Before we had showed up, he assumed it was spread by bite. I'm not sure if he knew about scratches too, but now I'm rethinking.
If we all carry it, and aren't walkers yet, then maybe it spreads differently than we thought.
It's more likely spread not by a bite or a scratch, but by bodily fluids or even through physical contact.
Not one of us hasn't been touched by a walker, or touched someone who was already carrying it.
It would make sense for it to be bacterial because that would explain how we all carry it, but aren't walkers. Our immune systems could be strong enough to fight it off but if we got a larger sudden dose of the pathogen like being bitten by an infected mouth riddled with the bacteria, or scratched by dirty fingernails also teaming in it, or ingested more of the infection — like if some of the blood got in your mouth during a kill and you accidentally swallowed it or something.
There's no way to find out anymore. Not for us at least. But I can't help thinking about it. Human curiosity, the curse and cure for us all.
Carl stepped closer to me, shivering and tugged on his shoulder, pulling him around my knee so I can get my arms around him, rubbing his back.
We should get the fire started sooner rather than later.
I looked at Daryl and he nodded. Eve speak strikes again.
"'Ey, grab some a them branches right there." Daryl pointed, in front of T-Dog at the edge of the road where one of the trees has fallen down.
I went to stand up and Carl shifted to help me. He is like the perfect height for this.
My legs feel like pulled taffy that's been set on fire.
I rubbed Carl's arm instinctively, trying to warm him up a little. Come on, bubba. Let's go get you warmed up.
"Eve, would you mind walking Carl and Beth here down to the campsite?" Hershel asked.
I nodded, and motioned at the young blonde girl to follow.
She moved from her place tucked under her dad's arm and came to my side, giving me a brief shy smile.
The dying grass crunched with my first step onto it, followed by the others and soon we made it almost all the way to the weary crumbling stone enclosure.
I sat the kids down near the middle and looked around with a more scrupulous eye.
It's not much but it's better than nothing.
It's mostly dead leaves and twigs but it's mostly flat, I don't see any hazards like exposed rebar or broken glass or anything so that's a good sign.
However, it's got two openings, on both sides. That's better than a bottleneck of one entrance but it makes me a little nervous considering how easy it'll be to get ambushed.
It's better than an open camp though.
If we dig a little pit for the fire, it'll help hide the light from people, wild animals, and walkers alike.
I walked (however feebly) to the other side, looking out.
There's another darker stone wall about 50 feet from this back entrance. The forest's kinda thin here but now I think I know why. It looks like a damn of some sort. A small one, for like a tiny lake or something. There's a little bit of water leaking off the top and looks like it's created a small gutter-like stream along the base, running off into the deeper forest.
I can't see much else very well from back here. Gosh why does the Georgia forest have to be so thick?
Sight lines aren't great right here, but they're better than the farm, where the trees came right up to 9/10ths of the property lines.
That makes me nervous, but we don't have much of a choice. It's better than hanging in the wind.
Still we shouldn't stay here longer than we have to.
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