APOV

Walking towards the building after having been off for a couple of days, I still felt a sense of dread despite it being a week since that night. I had received no calls stating I was fired, no letter that my employment had been terminated so getting up this morning for work, I got myself ready just like any other day.

Just like any other morning, there was a white rose sitting atop of my mailbox as I passed, this one in full bloom, so beautiful that I had to pick it up. I had received one every day so far, ever since I had found that leaflet about the job in my mailbox weeks ago.

I had left that one alone, not wanting to take someone else's flower but when another appeared by its side the next morning, I was taken aback by the need I felt to keep them. I didn't though as they were not meant for me.

"Samuel always gives me flowers" my elderly neighbour had stated when I had bumped into her at the mailbox one morning days later, the flowers starting to pile up now and look a little worse for wear at the lack of water they had received.

"How long has he been giving you flowers," I asked her expecting for her to say, all her married life as I collected the roses, ready to take them back to my apartment. If no one was going to claim them, I would.

"Since the day he died," She had told me, shocking me with her words. "That night after they had taken him from my sight, I found a pale pink rose on my pillow when I went to bed. The man never gave me not one flower when he was alive, he pops his clogs and I now live in a florist."

I could not stop the laugh that left my lips at her words. Was my own mother leaving flowers for me as white roses were a favourite of hers or was this something else? Did I have a stalker now who showered people with flowers before killing them in their bed? Whatever this was, it made me more aware of who was around and made me realise more and more each day how stupid I was to go to Christian's room.

I opened the outer door of the hotel, preparing myself for the darkness that was inside. Walking down the small corridor, I once again said my good mornings to the guard, one that was returned without shock or hesitation now.

Walking across the foyer, I smiled seeing a new girl behind the reception desk with Ros. Upon getting closer, I could see no anxiety on her face as I had had on my own on my first day and from the way they were speaking, they must have known each other well.

"Ana, this is Hannah, our newest recruit. She's a good friend of Riley's and for some crazy reason, she wants to work here."

"Hello" I smiled offering her my hand, her cold handshake not shocking me as I had felt it before.

"Hi Ana, Riley has told me all about you" she replied, smiling back at me.

I don't know how much he could tell her, how much he had learned about me in the few brief moments we had spent in each others company. I worried then that if she was his girlfriend, did she think I was stepping on toes for sharing a drink with him.

"Riley is nice" was all I could say to which seeing her nod she agreed.

"He is, he's a one of a kind. My best friend who I've known for a long time. Too long it seems when he teases me."

Knowing from experience what that teasing was like, I laughed. I also laugh when I think back to what I first thought of the cold hands of some of the people here.

I had thought this place was really a secret hospital, one that deals with unusual illnesses. I had thought that many times when I have been sat behind the desk waiting to check-in or out the next guest before quickly dismissing it as my hands too had grown cold with the air conditioning that sometimes blew from up above.

I also had another theory, one that was more likely with some of the public displays I had witnessed while doing my job. Unless there was a clinic for sex addiction in here then I think this is a hotel where pretty much anything goes, anything sexual that is. I work in a brothel, a sex dungeon, a large luxurious sex house and despite hoping that I don't run into him again, despite what goes on in those rooms up above, I find I actually feel comfortable working here. Strange I know, but I do

…

With Leila off today, Susannah swanned in just after one for the late shift. My hours usually finish at six although I have worked later than that when needed. Susannah though today will not be leaving until midnight, working the long shift that I would not like to do.

"I have a question," I asked when it was just Hannah, Susannah and myself, Ros disappearing to who knows where.

"What's that," Hannah asked me.

"I've worked here weeks now and yet, the reception staff are the only staff I ever see. No chefs in this hotel, despite food being available for us on our break. No housekeeper either, making sure the rooms are made. I am sure they are here somewhere but I've yet to see them."

"Maybe they have another entrance they come into," Hannah said. "I'm sure their uniforms are not up to the same standards as ours, so would not be allowed to use the front entrance like us."

"Maybe, you would think they would contact the reception desk at some point though, even if that is just to see how many rooms are filled tonight."

"Maybe they're not needed," Susannah said, sounding bored with the conversation as usual.

"Not, needed. I don't think I would want to stay in a hotel where I had to bring or wash my own sheets."

My words brought forth laughter from Susannah and I knew she was laughing at me. As usual, I was the result of her teasing so deciding I was not going to give her the attention she wanted to continue mocking me, I got on with my job.

The afternoon continued as I tried to get on with my work, ignoring Susannah in the process. Hannah was nice, speaking to all of us especially about the work she has done before.

"I worked in Ichor, one of New York's finest hotels although like here, only the best get in as the clientele is just as select as here. It's another part of the Grey Group" she ended, looking straight at me.

Just hearing part of his name had my hands clammy, my fingers going over the scratch on my wrist that will not fade away. Susannah told me she had had one once upon a time but hers went within a day. I'm beginning to wonder sometimes if what she has said is true or she is just bitter because no man will give her the time of day within these walls.

"Is Ichor like here?" Susannah asked Hannah.

"You mean the clients" she replied as I moved to the end of the counter to hand over the key to an elderly gentleman who either lives here on the fourth floor somewhere or stays here every time I'm on shift.

"No, I mean the rough sex, the bondage, submissives," she said aloud shocking me with her words.

I was going to tell her to be quiet for speaking like that in front of a guest but I was speechless at the lack of tact that was all Susannah.

"Do not worry my dear, she is desperate for attention, even I wouldn't give her one" the elderly guest spoke quietly to me, making me giggle before I watched him leave for the elevator, off to his room to do who knows what.

"Something funny" Susannah asked when we were alone again.

"He was just telling me a joke" I lied, still chuckling to myself.

My laughter soon stopped when Susannah turned her attention onto me.

"What about you Ana, would you like to be someone's pet."

"How would I be someone's pet, I'm human and I don't have fur."

"Silly Ana," she said, mocking me. "I'm talking about dominants, submissives, whips, ropes, chains. I'm talking about handing control of your life over to a strong man, playing the weak feeble woman."

"You obviously know nothing about BDSM if you think the submissive is weak. You also obviously know nothing about what goes on within these walls" Hannah said, standing much taller than before, her body shaking with anger she was barely holding in at Susannah's words.

"Whatever, I've seen what goes on in the club, I want a Dom of my own."

"You wouldn't last two minutes if you were taken to one of those rooms. You are certainly not worthy of being someone's pet."

My brain felt like it was being fried as I watched the conversation go back and forth, making the mistake of saying quietly although not that quietly, that I had no idea what they were speaking about, so the focus was back on me.

"Clueless Ana" Susannah said, shaking her head, mocking me for the last time.

I don't know what it was with this woman but I had had enough of being the butt of her anger and her jokes.

"I'm not clueless" I spat at her, my words stopping Hannah who was moving closer to Susannah and looking like she wanted nothing more than to knock her to the floor. I barely know Hannah but she was sticking up for me, unlike someone who was supposed to be my friend.

"Really, do you really know what goes on in this hotel," Susannah asked, trying to sound brave with the seething woman in front of her.

"What happens in the privacy of peoples rooms is their business, not mine."

"Naive, too."

"Just stop" I shouted, making the audience of guests we had garnered smile as I stood up to the bully. "I may not have been out there spreading my legs for the world like you have, so desperate for attention but I've seen and been through more than you could ever know."

Excusing myself, I didn't wait around for her reply as I told Hannah I was taking my break before I left the foyer, ignoring the fact that I was making my way down a dark corridor as I made my way to the bathroom.

Inside I cursed myself for letting Susannah get to me. She was the workplace bully, just like the girls at school who had made fun of me because I didn't have a mum. I have one, she is just not here with me now but that does not mean that I can't feel her.

My mind went back to the rose then that was sat in my locker, probably withering away in the heat. Thinking of that made me want to cry again, wondering who had left it and what trouble I was getting myself into by taking them.

Leaving the bathroom, my mind a little clearer now I had cried my tears away, I wondered why the sensor that picks up body heat had not made the lights come on. All corridors had them, all lights off unless it was used. They were trying to save energy, save the planet in their own little way Ros had told me. They will save energy on this corridor as this one seems to be broken. Sometimes I think this hotel was made for moles as they would be the only thing alive that would feel comfortable with it being this dark.

Halfway down I hit a wall, a solid cold wall. With a little light filtering in from the foyer, I looked up into the eyes of the man I had hoped I would not see again.

He was silent, a statue, his arms at my waist as he had caught me, stopping me from falling backwards when I had bumped into him. After a moment, he had still not moved, all except his eyes which seemed to be moving all over my face, taking every inch of me in.

"Sorry" I mumbled, apologising for walking into him, as I waited for him to release me. Only when I made to step back from him did he finally let me go but he continued to block my way.

"It is alright," he finally said quietly before startling me as he moved his hand to my face.

"Please don't."

"Your tears, I was only going to brush them away, not hurt you."

"No, you have already done that enough, already left your mark on me."

"I don't understand."

"No," I told him, turning my arm over to show him the mark, a mark that made his eyes widen, his hands soon cradling my wrist.

"I apologise, I didn't mean to hurt you. It should be gone" he whispered the last part but in the corridor, it echoed around the room.

"Is it you that is leaving me flowers then?" I asked before quietening as I realised what I said cannot be true. It can't be him as I received them before I had even started to work here.

"Flowers, what flowers," he asked.

"Roses, white ones."

He released my hand, shock filling his face as he took a step back from me.

"I know nothing about the roses" he stated, his voice firm now as if he was angry with me.

Looking into his face though, I saw a flash of pain before he shook it away. Not wanting to be here any more, especially in such a confined space I once again moved to step around him only for him to yet again block my way.

"Excuse me."

"Ana."

"Are you here to terminate my employment?" I asked, wondering why he was stopping me from going back to my job.

"What, no. Why would you think that."

"After we spent time in your room."

"It is not my room," he said defensively.

"The room you take women up to then" I replied, getting angry now which just got worse when he huffed out a laugh.

"If only you knew."

"I don't think I want to know thank you, especially after being placed in the same club as Susannah."

"Susannah talks too much, thinks things have happened when they've not."

"Are you saying that you didn't lure her up to your room, lay her on the same bed that you did me?" I asked.

"Susannah was never taken to any room, she was a means to an end, you."

"Was treated just the same. Now if you're not here to fire me, could you please get out of my way as I have work to do and I still have a few hours yet to do it."

He moved out of the way, not saying a word as I stepped past although I could feel his eyes on me all the way down the corridor. Only when I reached the end did his words stop me.

"Who are you."

"What," I asked, turning around.

"I asked you, who you are."

"I'm Ana, I'm no one."

Not saying another word, I left him, going back into the lighted foyer.

I took a few deep breaths trying to compose myself as I walked towards an even busier reception area than it had been before. Were people waiting for round two of my argument or as I watched them wanting to check in, none waiting in front of her, were they expressing how happy they were that someone had finally put her in her place.

Whatever it was, I did my job like I was paid to do.

…

Walking home from work, my eyes adjusted easily to the dark as I had spent my last hour going through tomorrows bookings, making sure everything was ready in the dimly lit office.

I felt like I was hiding in a way in the back but if I'm honest, I needed the space. Needed it from Susannah and I needed it from him.

She had tried to apologise but I ignored her, not wanting to hear it at the moment. I felt she was mocking me because I had led a sheltered life until I came here, she knows nothing of what happened to me.

The streets were lit, although in places the bulbs were gone, knocked out by someone or something. Despite being out in the open, I enjoyed the breeze on my face, the space that being in that hotel doesn't bring.

For the first time this evening, I have second-guessed myself about working at that place. I do enjoy it there but maybe its time I looked somewhere else as being around certain people is giving me nothing but heartache.

Entering my apartment, I flicked the light on before putting the rose into the vase on my kitchen counter, thankful that it had survived the day. Opening a few of my windows, I welcomed the fresh air as I moved around getting ready for bed. Having been a warm day, it was stifling in here and despite the noise coming in from outside, the faint beat of the music from the club half a block away, to the man in the building opposite who liked to strum his guitar all night, my bedroom window at least would be staying open tonight.

Removing my clothes, I threw them one at a time toward the hamper, grumbling when my blouse fell to the floor. I would get it in a minute, I told myself, the shower beckoning for now. Under the spray, I washed away all the stress I had gone through today. Yes, I had argued with Christian but it was Susannah's words that had upset me more.

Climbing into bed, I pulled my laptop towards me. While I waited for it to set up, I looked back to my dresser, smiling at the faces on the photos smiling back. Seeing my parents faces, knowing how much they love me despite one no longer being here, was the calming effect I needed

Once it was all up and running, I bravely typed BDSM into the search bar. What came up made me shake my head, not at the contents I was seeing but at myself.

Susannah was right, I am naive and have a lot to learn in this world. Flicking from picture to picture, each one showing me more and more that it was not for me, made me think of a delivery that I had signed for earlier that day. Where did the chains and barbed wire come into all this? Realising I was opening my mind to questions, I would have no answer to, I closed down the laptop, picking my parent's photo up instead.

"Goodnight, mum, dad" I whispered, placing a kiss over the glass on each of their faces.

Putting it back down, I looked to the photos of my mother and me which was taken so long ago. She was laughing at my giggling face as she had just covered my face with kisses. I miss her so much and often wonder how life would have been if we had not gone off the road on that rain-filled day.

Laying down in my bed, I turned off the lamp. I was exhausted, more so than I had felt in a long time so closing my eyes and enjoying the slight breeze that was filtering through the window, I finally drifted off to sleep.

….

Unbeknownst to Ana, a bird had landed on the fire escape outside her bedroom window just as she had arrived, a large bird, one of prey that had followed her here and had been watching her move around her apartment. As bird became man, keeping to the shadows, it was time for him to step inside.

Thank you for reading.

Christian has a few shocks coming next chapter when he finally realises who Ana is.

Until then, which I'm hoping will be Monday, take care.

Caroline.