I was so freaking excited about this chapter and writing it that I wanted to make quadruple fucking sure I did it to my own stupidly exact specifications. Whether my specifications are up to your lovely standards, well, we'll see. Regardless, I LOVED writing this chapter and I hate that I didn't have the time to churn it out sooner. Thanks for your patience and ENJOY!

He could feel her nails digging in to his arms, muscles flexing as he kept a tight grip on her waist. He was urging her on, encouraging the movements of her hips. The tight, wet heat of her cunt clamped down on his member and he felt a groan rumble in his chest. Her hair, long and unkempt, fell around her body, tickling his abdomen when she leaned forward to angle him deeper within her. She moaned, hips working, possessed by her need for him. Her lips found his, teeth biting so hard she broke the skin. Her desire was unapologetic but he was not one to complain. He would accept every bit of pain and every ounce of pleasure she bestowed on him.

She pulled back, panting harshly, fingers biting into his skin. Her eyes were alight with a roguish impulse.

"It feels so good," she yelped when he thrusted up, striking the edge of her cervix, "Do not stop!"

Never, he thought. He repeated the motion and another cry parted her lips,

"Ah, Lee-kun!"

Sasuke startled awake, nearly yanking his arm out from underneath Sakura. She was nestled against him, head on his chest and arm over his waist, still sleeping peacefully. He heaved a dense sigh and tightened his hold around her. He shifted his weight, raising his other hand to her upper back, and kissed the top of her head. He breathed in the floral scent of her hair, the oils that she used. She exuded warmth and comforted his frayed nerves. His guilt over the letter pressed upon him, but he found that he would destroy it again, burn it even, if given the chance. He was not ready to let go of her, but Lee's epistle had proved he was not the only one who desired her in such a way. He thought that his feelings for Sakura were unique, but perhaps he did pine for her like a pathetic child.

"Sasuke-kun," her nails raked down his muscular torso, lids fluttering open, "Is something wrong?"

"Go back to sleep," he kissed her forehead and stroked the tangled strands of her hair, "I'm sorry I woke you."

"You did not wake me," she whispered, a sly grin on her lips as she slid her thigh along his turgid member, "This did."

"Hn," Sasuke laughed low, a rumble in his throat, but he hid his eyes, turning them to the ceiling so that she would not see the truth that lay there.

"What is it, Sasuke-kun?"

"It is not important. Go to sleep."

"Your refutation only aids my suspicion. Do you realize that?" she propped herself up on one of his pillows to see his face properly.

"I did not," Sasuke smirked, "I thought you were always suspicious of me."

"Only because you give me reason to be," she said solemnly. He cupped her cheek and kissed her lips, but she put her hand to his chest and pushed him back gently, "I am too upset to sleep, Sasuke-kun."

"Then we will not sleep," he stroked the back of her hand with his knuckles. She considered him briefly.

"Tell me something."

"Tell you what?"

"Anything," she shook her head, exasperated, "Tell me something that is genuine and true. We are so close and yet I still feel you are very far from me, as though you are not real," she fell to a soft whisper, "At times, I think I have imagined you."

Her words struck his heart fast with a devastating accuracy. Sakura's gaze dropped and she chewed her lip as she waited for his answer. But silence was all that greeted her; it swelled within the space around them, smothering her. Sakura pushed off the bed, but Sasuke caught her wrist.

"Do not leave me," his words leaked the desperation he felt. He did not know what to say to her, but he did not want to allow that distance between them yet again, "I can not stand it, knowing that I am the cause of your pain and yet am unable to be your solution," he looked away from her, swallowing thickly, but kept a steady hand, "It is a conscious choice to keep parts of myself from you and it is one I must abide by."

He felt her tense beneath the pads of his fingers, felt her pulse quicken at her wrist.

"Does your brother know your secrets?"

"Yes," Sasuke hoped that admission alone would solicit her conviction. Tentatively, his eyes met hers, but she kept a guarded expression.

"Do you trust me?"

Sasuke would have retorted that it did not have anything to do with trust, but he knew that to be a lie. The sad truth was: he could not allow himself the luxury of putting so much faith in her. He knew how she would react; she would abhor him for his lineage. . . And perhaps even turn him in to the Emperor for it, as well. His silence then spoke for him and she ripped herself away, getting to her feet. He sat up, ready to follow her until she fixed him with her gaze.

"Sakura, please!"

"No, Sasuke-kun," she glowered at him from beside the bed, "I am sympathetic to your troubles and I understand that all pasts carry secrets, but do you think you can keep them to yourself your whole life? Do you feel control when you keep people at such a distance?" she did not wait for him to answer, barreling through the words before she could think, "Will you keep these things from your wife?"

Sasuke was silenced, though his response hung on his tongue, awaiting the moment he would let it loose. Her eyes flashed with sorrow and, oddly enough, fear. Her hands were fists, tightening as she shook with the tempest of her emotions.

"Well?" she prompted, though she feared his reply.

"I will not take a wife," he grit his teeth, hissing through them, "I do not wish to."

Sakura was surprised not by the relief she was overcome with, but by the tentative despair that worked its way within her. Would he not marry because of her? Or was it because -

"There is no one that so enraptures me as you do," he whispered, as if in defeat, "You excite me in ways that captivate my thoughts. My heart races for you and I crave your body against mine. It is not because I need release, it is because merely having you beside me - I am at peace in those moments," he swallowed, struggling to keep his eyes on her probing stare, "I fear the day that you will take a husband, because I know it will be the end of me."

Sakura fell against the wall, her legs giving out under the weight of his words. A long, heavy silence fell between them. Sasuke's guilt for loving her mingled with his deception and congealed in his throat. His admittance fell like bricks off his tongue,

"I read Lee-san's letter," he hid his eyes in shame, but Sakura was perplexed; she did not think he should be embarrassed by such an unimportant act. Of course he was curious, and there was nothing wrong with that. Nonetheless, she felt he was hiding something else and it prompted her to dig deeper.
"What did you think of it?" her throat felt dry, words scratching against her esophagus.

"I was disgusted with it," Sasuke spat, "We are too similar for my liking; he feels for you the way I do."

"He does not," she shook her head slowly, "I think that is impossible," her heart fluttered, mind racing, and head light, "Where is it?"

"What?"

"The letter," she clarified, "Where is it?"

Sasuke's eyes flickered to the mantle above the fire, then to her. He slipped out of the bed, abdomen clenched taut as he walked, disgraced, to the fireplace. He swept the tattered pieces of Lee's heart into his hand and brought them to Sakura. Taking hold of her wrist, he set the fragments with immense care into her hand. Her eyes dropped to her open palm, then shot up to his morose countenance. She slapped him, hand stinging with the ferocity she had placed behind the action. He took a step back from her.

"How dare you?!" her voice trembled with anger, fist closing around the shredded letter, "What gives you the right to do such a thing?!" he shook his head, the words vanishing from him, "Do you think you can control me in this manner? Do you seek to take and take and take from me until I have nothing left?! You cannot keep me to yourself when I can not keep you in the same way!" Sakura began to weep, turning into the wall, it being the only foundation she felt safe with in that moment, "You have my heart and my body - Lee-san will never possess me in these ways - what more could you possibly desire?! Is that not enough for you?!" her broken voice dropped to a whisper, "To know that you own me so completely?"

Sasuke frowned acutely; he was aching to approach her, to garner some sense of comfort from her and for her.

"I can not control how they feel for you, nor how you feel for me," he drew in a sharp breath, "You have no idea how greatly that scares me," she shut her eyes to the wall, but her ears were attentive to his spoken thoughts. He began to walk toward her, reaching his itching fingers out to clasp her shoulder. She turned at his behest, eyes fluttering open to look at him. Her lip trembled as she faced the wide, endless black of his gaze. Then, he kneeled at her feet, hands dropping to his sides, shoulders slumped, chest expanding with the swell of his breath. She watched him, expression alleviating as his did the same, "And I know one day you will not be mine."

His fingers reached out to touch her calf, slipping beneath her robe and skimming along her flesh. She shivered as he went higher, goosebumps following his fingers. He squeezed her hip and ran his hand over her stomach, thumbing the underside of her breast. She arched off the wall, urging into his hold, letting the remnants of Lee's note fall to the floor. He took her movement as invitation and loosened her silk enough to press his lips against her abdomen. His teeth bit down and he began to suck, bruising her tender skin. Her hands flew to his neck, winding around him, knotting her fingers in his hair. He wrapped his arms around her as she was wracked with roughened sobs.

"I do not wish to know a life without you in it," Sasuke's voice was hoarse, scrapped by emotion, "But I see it in my thoughts and in my dreams. It is so clear that I know it can not be far off. Still, I wish for you every moment of every one of my days," his eyes were boundless, filled to no foreseeable capacity with the passion he kept only for her, "I hope no one will ever possess your heart as I do, if I do, but I know there are things I can never have with you and that is my undoing."

Sakura's fingers quivered greatly as she was caught in his entrancing gaze. She shuddered under the vigor that lay there, no longer repressed by his corrupted control. He was hers, if she so desired. And she did, Kami, she did.

"I love you," her words bubbled up, spilling over her lips, "I'm in love with you. I am certain of it."

Their eyes locked briefly before Sasuke shot to his feet and took her lips with his. She clambered for a steady hold on him as he commandeered their ardor, steering them to the bed. They fell back on the sheets, hands flying everywhere, pulling at cloth to find the contact they craved. They parted for a breath, but he dove to her neck, drawing her skin into his mouth to suck harshly. Her fingers dug into his back, raking over his shoulder blades and the sinew of his muscles as she moaned. Her mind was becoming clouded, but, even still through the haze of arousal he brewed within her, something flared to the surface.

"Sasuke-kun," he did not answer her, mouth traveling lower to pull a stiffened nipple between his lips. He was intent on ravaging her, razing her with a pleasure that imprinted him upon her very soul. She cried out for him. His tongue left a warm, wet trail on her skin as he slipped lower. He kissed her hipbone, leaving his lips there for a long second. She reached for him then, "I need something, Sasuke-kun," her fingers stroked his cheek, the reddening of his skin decreasing, "I need something real," her cunt ached with him so close, but the longer she looked into his eyes, the more she found herself desperate for the truth, "I do not want you to lie to me when everyone else already does so."

Sasuke sighed, a defeated sound she did not know him capable of making. He kneeled on the floor between her legs, hands resting at her hips.

"I do not want you to know the truth about me," his breath was hot against her thigh.

"Then, I cannot do this," she shook her head and sat up quickly. She pulled him up by his chin, lips hovering over his, "I cannot do this with you, Sasuke-kun," she kissed him deeply, passionately, and parted with a frown, "When you are ready to be honest with me, then I will be here, waiting for you."

Sakura turned, slipping out of his arms as tears slid over her cheeks. She took up her sash, tying her robe closed, and walked to the entryway. Sasuke pushed off the bed, coming to his feet, and watched as she stopped at the door, fingers trembling as she tried to clutch the nob, but she failed to find her grip. Her fingers continued to slip over the cool metal.

Finally, she paused, placing her hand against the door as she inhaled shuddering breaths. She did not want to leave, did not want to suffer as she struggled against the threads that tied them together. She knew she would fall apart as soon as she left that room. And if she fell apart, she wanted it to be in his arms.

But Sasuke did not know that, all he saw was her back to him, and he panicked,

"I lost everything that night," he blurted out. His heart raced and he tried to steady himself with a deep breath, "When the Akatsuki attacked Konoha, I lost my family," his words were strained against the lump in his throat, "I can not lose you, too."

Keeping her hand against the door, Sakura turned to look at him with befuddled eyes.

"What are you talking about, Sasuke-kun?"

"They came to my village first," he sounded so lost, so much like an animal wounded; and she was the vicious hunter, "They burned down our homes. They killed the elders and enslaved the children," Sasuke winced and shut his eyes for a moment. His whole body tensed, then he exhaled, looking to her once more, "Those pyres could be seen from miles away and the Hokage did nothing," his voice dropped, darkened as memories obscured his onyx orbs, "I lost my entire clan that night."

"Sasuke-kun," her breath caught in her throat as something sickening prickled at the nape of her neck. She felt suddenly as though their roles had been reversed; she now the prey backed into a corner, vein opened for him to feast upon, "You are an Uchiha?"

He couldn't bring himself to speak so he nodded in a movement almost imperceptible, but she had been watching him closely. She choked on a breath and on a sob, fumbling for the brass knob. He shut his eyes when she yanked open the door and flinched when it slammed.

Sakura could not quell the anger that boiled to life in her stomach as she rushed to her room. She clutched the handle of her door when she pushed it shut. Her breath came in sharp and fast, heart battering in her chest.

An Uchiha. Within the walls of the palace.

She wasn't safe. She needed to alert somebody, another guard, her father - someone. She turned the lock on her door, even though she knew he had been given a key. A key that was meant to keep her safe, but one that had been put in the hands of an Uchiha. Her stomach churned as she considered that thought; she wasn't sure if he was an Uchiha. . . Or if he was just Sasuke.

Which man had she just professed her love to? Which man held her heart?

It was impossible to tell.

As she pondered that, she realized that even though she had a seething hatred for him in the moment, there was a feeling curled deep within her heart that she could not shake. While she felt the severity of this truth opening beneath her in an endless, dark hole, she felt she wanted to run to him, comfort him and be comforted in turn. An incredible revelation of unimaginable weight had just been placed on her and all she wanted to do was go to Sasuke and tell him, to confide in him, even though he was the source of her pain.

She groped along the wall for the mantle of the fireplace in the cold, dim space. She found the flint and steel then knelt on the floor, striking the firewood to life. The heat of the blaze did nothing for the ice that spread through her. She thought she might sit and contemplate for a while, but truthfully she was too perturbed by Sasuke's admission and, really, she wished she could simply slip away from the whole evening.

She got to her feet and trudged to her bed. Roughly, she pulled back the mussed, silk sheets to climb in, but stopped short when the fire lit up a dark spot on the bed. A flush came to her cheeks as she thought her release must have hit her so roughly that her wetness had sullied the bed. Sakura could picture them on the sheets, his mess of hair between her legs as he dragged her through a scorching orgasm. She swiped her finger along the patch and recoiled when it stained her skin red. She ran her fingers over the fitted sheet and found dried streaks of blood from where Sasuke had gripped the fabric. A hand flew to her stomach; it was not her time of the month yet. Her cycle would not begin for another week. What could - ? She felt her knees go weak at the realization of where the blood had come from.

His fingers had been like a piston as they drove into her, so precise and sure, seeking only to heighten her enjoyment. But there was that pinch, that slight pain - well, she had been too consumed with pleasure to have given it much thought. . .

Sasuke had taken her innocence and they had been none the wiser. Her entire body quaked and her stomach roiled with nausea. The cold sweat of fear perspired on her skin; the burden of her virginity was gone, but in its place began an anxiety that threatened to asphyxiate her.

She was unfit for marriage and unfit for the throne. She clutched her hand over her mouth to prevent the curdling scream that fought to be set free. The blood drained from her face; she was unfit for any other man, but that was no epiphany to her.

She had known that truth from the moment she had set her naive gaze upon him.

Sasuke had opened his eyes, watching the door as though she might stride right through and straight into his arms. He had known what to expect and it had hurt worse than the slap to his cheek, but still he thought he could be the one to wipe her tears away. He loved her, did love her, and she had walked out on him. How foolish of him to think she could still be so amicable. There was no doubt in his mind that she was thoroughly disgusted with him now, afraid of him, too, even.

He needed to leave, not just that room, but the palace as well. Perhaps he could travel to Naruto or hide out with Jiraiya. He was sick of hiding, but what else could he do? Sasuke grabbed his pack and pulled out his uniform.

Sakura continued to wait for the remorse, for the regret of allowing him this intimacy with her. It never came. Perhaps there was something wrong with her. Was she sick for loving him? Was she sick for craving his touch and his words so that she might bask in that love? She drew the sheets up to her pillows and walked out of her bedroom with no formulation to speak. Sasuke stood in the hallway, bag slung over his shoulder, hesitating by the front doors. She froze, despondency taking hold of her.

"Do you intend to leave?"

He turned, startled as though he had been lost in thought, but he quickly pulled on a guarded expression.

"I think it best," he tightened his grip on the strap of his bag.

"I will not tell anyone, Sasuke-kun," she realized the verity of her words as she uttered them. She began to speak again, to add that she would not tell anyone yet, but she could not be sure she wanted to turn him in.

"I will not ask you to keep my secret. Unlike you, Naruto had no choice in the matter," he shook his head solemnly, "I will not condemn another I care about. You can wash your hands of this, and me."

Sakura swallowed harshly and looked away. She did not want to. Even now, she felt a devastating ache taking over her heart, cracking her open until she stood vulnerable before his startlingly stoic eyes. She did not want to see him in uniform, walking out of her doors to desert her. She wished they were naked; tangled within each other, in her sheets, in their words, nothing but a breath between them. So she spoke again, stalling and entreating him to stay with her for just a moment more,

"Did you know him?" tears were welling in her eyes again and she spat the name out like a bad taste on her tongue, "Itachi?"

"Yes," he spoke slowly, carefully, though he thought it might be better to just get it over with. There was no avoiding it now, this was it, the nail in the coffin she would bury him in. He grit his teeth, but exhaled softly and said, with a resigned look, "He was my brother."

Sasuke saw the affect that simple statement had on her. He watched her break, caught the realization as it flashed in her eyes that he knew, he had known all along, and still he had let himself develop feelings for her. And worse yet, he had let her fall in love with him.

"It changes nothing for me," he said quietly, scrambling for purchase in the chasm that was quickly swallowing him whole, "I still - ,"

"You are worse than they are!" she said suddenly through her disquieting sobs. He flinched from her, "You are worse than my parents who lie to me like I am a child!" tears stained her painfully beautiful features, the porcelain of her fair skin cracking under the pitiless truth, "Did you expect to keep this from me forever?! Or did you not wish to know me that long?!," she drew in a sharp breath, "Do you want me dead?!"

"Never," he spoke with a plea, "My brother's actions were not my own. I was a child!"

"But you carry the name of your traitorous family!"

"And the burden of it! Of which I, too, did not choose," his eyes bore into hers, but she had become blinded by her hatred.

"I will not permit you to leave these premises," her voice was unstable and rough.

"I can not stay here!" he protested.

"You will!" she snapped, "If you ever felt anything for me, you will stay here tonight!" she took a breath that caused her entire body to shudder, nostrils flaring as she pinned him under her unyielding gaze.

He tried to fight off the urge to set his pack down; it was a response he did not have to give thought to. He knew his feelings, though she was not sure of the depth he held for her. But he could not tell her now; she could not know that he loved her, too. It would be too painful to watch her recoil from those words so fragile and true. She asked for something real, but much like she had once told him, they could not have one without giving up the other. And so it came down to his honesty or his love. He supposed he would have been devastated with any outcome, left to ruin when she was forced away from him either because they were not meant for the other or because she could not stand the sight of him once she knew who he really was.

"Very well," he muttered, casting his eyes to the floor and retreating to his room. He hesitated to shut the door, but Sakura made the decision for him when she stalked back to her own space, slamming the wood behind her. He pushed the door closed and sank to the floor in his room with a heavy thump.

He felt suffocated, enclosed in her hand in a way that no longer made him feel coveted but rather helpless. Still, he could place no blame on her. She was not at fault for hating him. And she was most assuredly not at fault for hating his family. But there was nothing that he could do about her feelings now. That lack of control he confessed to her earlier was now a carriage thrown off the beaten path, hurtling toward a crag that would send him into the oblivion of an ocean. He could not help her hatred and she had every reason to despise him more than any other person would. She had been right; they were so close - too close to each other, he thought. The problem was their paths had already crossed long before they had even met; and he could not escape fate, try though he did.

After all, his clan was the reason she had never known her own brother.